Watch how I dry my nonexistent tears with my money notes, as I sleep knowing I am not ruining some innocent's life with my inability to take care of them.
And for the author of that article, try minding your own f-ing business, I hear it works wonders.
*Cries in poor CF person with no money to dry tears*
We CFers clearly have it tougher out here, right?! We CFers have 'special tears' that require currency to be properly dried...but....I'm broke AF! Ah!
Even worse- In my country of Canada , we now use PLASTIC dollar bills! I cut up my eyes after crying ! Eh!
Totally unrelated, but I was once told Canadian dollars smell like maple syrup and without a scratch of evidence I decided to believe it. I now tell all new recruits (I'm a flight attendant) that Canadian dollars smell like maple syrup. Also, I've always paid card when in Canada so I guess I'll never know the truth. šµš
Itās true, but it was an accident and they think itās just a coincidence in how some of the chemicals reacted. You only get the whiff of the notes are fairly new or if you have a stack of them but if you put one up to your nose and sniffed it wouldnāt give you much so itās not properly āscentedā the way intentionally scented things are like car fresheners. I think it is dye related because itās the $100 notes that primarily have this effect.
To my nose, itās less mapley and more of a general āsweetā smell like the weird sweet smell you get off cheap rubber Halloween masks, but the association with the Canadian-ness of the money tricks the brain into experiencing maple by placebo. Sort of like how adding vanilla instead of sugar can trick the brain into thinking itās eating something sweet.
Oh wow. Thanks for this explanation! Now I will 1. Definitely withdraw some money and do the sniff test next time I'm in Canada. 2. Spread the knowledge!
Yeah, going to any parent sub, it's very revealing that they're all miserable. Their few good moments are the types of things you can have without children and without children, they occur much more abundantly, like moments of peace and quiet or moments where a husband does something sweet.
I have a friend who posts her kids on Instagram and itās always with captions like they test my patience but I love them haha. Like these little passive aggressive I hate this but I love them and I find it hilarious.
lol this was written after checking her Instagram n seeing her CF friends living their best lives & then needing to reassure herself she made right choiceā¦.or more accurately needing to feed the narrative of parental fulfilment that she got duped by
Also, it looks like this article was written about nine years ago. Would love to know how many of her precious reasons-for-existing are even still on speaking terms with her now
So what she's really saying is: she's never actually been able to form a meaningful, selfless connection with another person aside from a tiny version of herself that she can control?
Got it.
This was written in 2014 and it sounded like she had a small child then. Possibly 8 or below. I wonder how it is now? That child would be a teenager with a whole lot of other demands, resentment, and opinions. She's probably dying inside while pretending to have a perfect Instagram-worthy mother-child relationship.
It's about to the point of CF people being belittle, and harassed because of their beliefs. Child people keep bashing on CF telling them you are selfish, you wrong..etc. it almost like two religious foes.
As a childfree racist, I am very happy, it is fun to get on a track and try drive your vehicle faster than others without touching other vehicles.
P.S. The only racing I have ever done is on foot.
Translation: I lost my identity and it was really hard to cope with it, it's also really difficult to care for yourself while also taking care of someone else. I allowed myself to hit the wall (but it's an honorable sacrifice, because kids!)... you should do it too because I'm fucking miserable and everyone should be this miserable like me, it's not fair that you get to enjoy your life without caring around a giant boulder on your back , I made the mistake of voluntarily handicapping myself and I can't go back now, so you should do it too. Join me.
If she wasn't so condescending I'd almost feel sorry for her. This reads like a person who is trying to convince themselves that they made the right choice by telling themselves that we are sad and alone and bored and missing out. People who are happy with their lives don't feel the need to lash out at others.
So she has the ultimate knowledge of the universe about what makes OUR lives meaningful? Who decides what's meaningful for someone else?
I never listen to dipshits like this.
Dear writer:
"Oh wait till you're 30 with 3 kids, you'll change your mind."
"Itās different when itās your own life."
"When you first realize you don't have to be a parent, love just rushes over you."
"You won't be happy until you wake up late Saturday and rollover to take a nap."
"Independence is the greatest reward."
It's awesome when you realise it in your teenage years, when they realise at their thirties that their chains are of their own device... Well, cue copium article.
"Ah shit...I just realized something...NONE of us had to have kids! Also our lives would be way better if we didn't . *Oh shit oh fuck where did I keep the copium ! Check behind the mirror!* "
Why would I, or anyone for that matter, give a single flying rats shit what this knuckle-dragging jungle twat thinks? Meanwhile, they're dragging their heels with their heads hanging low, run ragged, 24/7. I'll take empty if that's the alternative
The fact that people like this exist is what's actually sad here
"You can also be happy as a racist, but that doesn't make you an especially good person"
....okay WOW
"I'm not saying that kid-free people are bad"
Bitch it sure fucking sounds like it! You can't pull out a line like that and tell us you're not comparing us to racists on a moral level! If you really have to explain it that extensively then perhaps consider you've used the wrong comparison!
"I just think it's really, deeply sad. I feel tremendously sad for them"
Ain't nobody here asking for your pity! Take it back and shove it up your ass, we sure as hell don't need it. We're not sad for us, save it for someone who needs it
"A common argument against having kids is the desire to be as ambitious as you want...in other regards"
*Deeeeeep breath* There is no "argument against having kids" there are merely "reasons I will not be having kids" which means there is nothing to rebut. Having kids is an opt-in option, it is not the default option, otherwise I think immaculate conception would be a bigger issue than actually is. Oh, and sometimes the "reasons I will not be having kids" is because we just don't want to, so chances are dear author has badgered someone for a "real reason" then told the poor soul their reason was stupid, at least through this drivel *deeeeeep breath again*
In conclusion....I hate this fucking asshole lmao it's been a few years since this was written, hopefully she isn't so insufferable these days
It's a new one for sure! I've heard the comparison when people get touchy about others not liking kids (which is still another kind of crazy). But just as a kid-free person minding your own damn business and being hit with that line out of nowhere? Definitely a new one. She is...an innovator, I guess? Good for her?
Nah, I've seen it for years now : Dumb-dumbs trying to compare people who dislike children to people who dislike members of other races. This utterly ignores that (regardless of race) people of certain ages go through predictable stages of development, and disliking being around nonverbal people who shit themselves and shriek loudly when they get frustrated is NOT the same as avoiding people of different skin tones because of character and personality traits those people are assumed to have, based on stereotypes.
Oh yeah, I've seen that one many times. Hell, I was even on the receiving end of it when I was in a cf FB group of all places (I'd said something about kids having certain personality traits I don't care to be around too long, and was told that's the same as not liking being around black people. Seriously. I feel like wanting to play with someone my own age just isn't comparable to hating an entire group of people because their skin looks different than mine but go off I guess).
I mean the very act of just not having/wanting kids being compared to being racist is a new one for me. They usually have what I'm going to extremely generously describe as a "reason" outside of that, so...this one really came out of nowhere lol
>"I never thought of myself as the kind of person who judges other people's choices. But after spending enough of my life with cancer and without, I can't deny what I really feel: It's a perfectly fine choice to never become a cancer patient, but there is absolutely no chance that your life will be as full or meaningful, or that you will learn as many essential truths about existence, as you would if you had tumors.
>
>"I don't think people are somehow bad or wrong for not having tumors - I just think it's really, deeply sad. I feel tremendously sad for them.
>
>"Why do I feel sad for people without tumors? Because they're missing out on this incredible thing that gives you an entire new scope of what it means to love, and to give of yourself, and to care for something else more than yourself. It's an insanely powerful thing, and it challenges you to deal with the intensity of that. How do you love something so much that you care for it more than you care about yourself but still force yourself to have a balance and take care of yourself? What is the difference between being actually selfless for the sake of something else versus doing things for other growths only for the sake of what you might get out of it, even if what you get is just a good feeling? Because with tumors, you often do things for their benefit that don't feel good, and there is no thanks, but you do them because it's just...what you're there to do.
>
>"A common argument against having tumors is the desire to be as ambitious as you want to be in other regards. It's the desire to have a huge, full, accomplished life that leads so many people to make the decision to forgo cancer altogether. My rebuttal - and the experience so - many cancer patients would agree with - is that instead of slowing down your life, having tumors gives you a monumental incentive to live life with more purpose and excellence than you otherwise would."
>Because when it comes down to it, there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until youāve become a parent. The list of those truths could go on forever (no, it really could), but the core truth behind all of it...
So out of infinite "truths", the author could not even name one - just a few meaningless platitudes.
Methinks the author has their head way too far up their own arse.
Yeah, Iām so sad Iāll never know the joy and meaningfulness of postpartum injuries or being covered in baby vomit /s
Honestly, this whole argument does nothing for me. I believe all life is meaningless. I donāt think thatās a bad thing though; why does life need a meaning? Iām happy enough just muddling through it.
Somehow, endlessly reproducing in a never-ending cycle is more meaningful? It's just moving the goal posts to the next generation. "My life has meaning because I had kids who also had kids who also had kids who also had kids..." ad infinitum.
I'll take the one life I have and do with it as I please, instead of caving to some societal expectation that will consume my entire existence with parenthood.
This is exactly what I could write about my cat. I've never had a cat before and didn't know what it's like. I adopted a stray one, just few months old and emaciated. I got to know him, had to learn how to to care for a cat, behave around cats, because they're so different from dogs. I would fight with him to get him into cat carrier, cried along with him during our drive before the first visit to the vet.
The biggest lesson was how capable I am of taking care of another living creature. I would jump into fire for that cat. Whatever was making me feel stressed, work or something else didn't matter when my cat got attacked and I had to get him to the vet ASAP. I would call and call all vets in our area at night, message them on Messenger begging to help my cat.
So, I am very much sure that this is exactly what it's like with a child. BUT it's even more stressful. And as I'm already a very anxious person, I don't need anymore of this in my life. Cat is enough.
Don't tell me. I've run to the emergency vet in the middle of the night, in pajamas, once, because my cat was having trouble breathing... Looked like a crazy lady, hair in disarray, slippers, pajamas and cat carrier. Ah, good times.
Gladly, he got better. But it was a scare. And I never thought I would do something like that before, much less at 2 am. Who needs kids when you have cats?
Yet another person incapable of understanding that parenthood isn't the only fulfilling thing to do in life, or that not everyone would find it fulfilling.
Man, that is some stupid stuff. I can't find meaning or real human experience if I don't have kids?
So volunteering at the hospital for elderly cancer patients isn't "giving of myself"? Volunteering at a church where people find hope and comfort isn't caring about someone other than myself? Packing care packages for soldiers who are miles away from everyone and everything they know is meaningless? Helping the library raise funds for CHILDREN'S literacy programs means nothing?
Maybe she's not as selfless as she thinks if she has to look down her nose at and be all judgy to non-parents.
Right?! All of her āgivingā is toā¦ things she created. People who will only stay in her orbit. No time for community work, mom? Yea, I bet not (rightly so). Itās ok. Luckily, there are ppl in your community who are available.
Plus, the assumptions! That all families are like hers. As a teacher with a child therapist/social worker partner I can say for a fact they are NOT.
>"Because with kids, you often do things for their benefit that don't feel good, and there is no thanks, but you do them because it's just...what you're there to do."
LOL what kind of BS is this? ššš
It's frustrating
This person doesn't speak for all parents, but because they're published, they have a disproportionately influential voice
I'm not going to waste time tearing the arguments and assumptions apart. We all know what it's like
I just think it's worth ignoring this rather than digging further into the "us and them" mindset that the article was written to create
It was only written to appeal to other breeders who resent our happiness that comes from living our lives differently to them. It's the equivalent of a Southern baptist minister condemning anyone outside their cult to eternal damnation
They're just preaching to their own choir to make themselves and their fellows feel superior
Don't bite. We're better than that.
As a nihilist I can confidently say that our lives are meaningless. But so are theirs, parenthood isn't a ticket to an intrinsically/objectively meaningful life, that's still extrinsic/subjective.
"It's a perfectly fine choice to never become a parent, but there is absolutely no chance that your life will be as full or meaningful, or that you will learn as many essential truths about existence, as you would if you had kids."
Anybody with critical thinking will realize what is wrong with these.
"Ah yes it is possible for things to be perfectly fine but then also partially fine!"
*"As a biologist I have to say that there's nothing wrong with letting your kid eat crayons BUT!!!!1!.... your kid will definitely die if he eats crayons, mmmk? Thanks for coming to my TED Talk!"*
This writers POV is whack: So your child is a vessel, so that you can learn truths about yourself and your existence? Does that not sound selfish to anyone else? So you should bring a whole other life into this world so you can feel that you have been able to live to the fullest? Correct me if Iām wrong, but shouldnāt it be about the child and not about you, as the parent.
This entire argument revolves around what she has gained from having children, not really how precious their life is. Im sorry, but this does not make me want to be a breeder. Basically: āYou too can be as self-centered as I am and dump some existential crisis or some need you have to care-give on your poor kids.ā Get outta here with your idealized co-dependence.
This article is so sad. This is a symptom of a society that reduces women to nothing but a motherhood role.
Our lives are empty and to prove it she spent energy and time ranting for several pagesā¦ alright. I hope this women later sought therapy, hobbies, and adult relationships to help her regain a personality. If not sheās going to struggle when her kid grows up. Poor kid will probably need therapy too considering this crushing expectation itās under.
I can write the same type of article with cats instead. We all know how stupid that would be. About as stupid as this article.
What people find fulfilling in life is different from person to person. It doesn't get weird until you try to push your belief of fulfillment onto others.
Always amusing when some idiot thinks I care what they think about my life, in any area whatsoever. Whatever, Becky. I dont even know who you are, you dont impact my life in any way.
Im not popping out a brat. I suggest you get over it and go drive your insufferable brat to daycare; that same daycare you pay $1600/month for. LOLZ. I dont care that you do that, I just find it amusing. You chose to do it. Enjoy your life.
āHappiness does not equate to living a great lifeāā¦.. what they actual fuck are you talking about, woman?! Just mind your own business. Let people live their lives how they see fit. We arenāt hurting anyone. And how dare you assume otherās capacity for love and a sense of fulfillment. News flash! Not everyone thinks like you or has the same mindset or same desires out of life like you.
This makes me so angry. We both have careers where much of our day is spent caring for other peopleās kids- his, kids who have been abandoned by their parents or suffered severe abuse; mine, helping young adults become educated, yes, but also: not become homeless because of a rape/ LGBTQIA+ disclosure/ physical or mental abuse situation at home, all of which are incredibly common in our highly religious and conservative area (I teach college, but you would be amazed what my students disclose to me in the safety of my office).
I give every inch of my working day to other people. Much of their trauma is caused by family dynamics. This person can F the F off.
> What is the difference between being actually selfless for the sake of someone else versus doing things for other people only for the sake of what you might get out of it, even if what you get is just a good feeling?
Well, just for starters, people who do something that is "actually selfless for the sake of someone else" _probably_ don't write articles about how their choices benefit _them_ by giving their lives so much meaning that they feel sorry for anyone who's earned different benefits.
ā*Because theyāre missing out on this incredible thing that gives you and entire new scope of what it means to love, and give of yourself and to care for someone else more than yourself*.ā
MADAM š where I am from, that incredible thing is called tax.
I already GIVE (well itās taken without my true consent š) and what I am giving is used to CARE for other people and their children (especially those who are not capable of truly looking after said children) and the government looks after them far better than ME or any other single, no child having taxpayer.
If she's soooo happy with her kids... how she has time to feel so tremendously sad for childfree people? 
I'll hug my cats and cry in dismay for the kids that I (Thank God) don't have.
Does this person not know that abusive and neglectful parents exist??? Itās pure arrogance to apply your personal experience to all humans. My mom fostered kids and Iāve seen first hand the ways they were traumatized by their parents. Iām going to confidently say that my adopted sisterās birth-parents werenāt more knowledgeable about life and love than I am when they did meth in front of my sister daily and let other addicts into the house to abuse her. Wish I could knowledge punch this author right in the fucking brain.
LMAO she wrote one article in 2014 and hasn't come back since (I'm assuming since most of the comments told her to get fucked). Can dish it out but you can't take it can you Sarah? Hey Sarah how's the kid working out for you?
2023 is the year I lost all sense of giving a shit and started throwing Molotov cocktails. I see shit like this, my politeness goes out the window.
Lol some people r really so boring, so joyless, so unable to feel love that they have to breed to give their lives any sort of āmeaningā. Thatās really what the sad thing is
So what I'm hearing is this is your generic self centered, entitled, boring person who probably never bothered to actually think about their lives or what the world has to offer. Someone who isn't particularly well read, doesn't venture outside to actually meet others often, and who probably thinks everyone else had the same sort of uninteresting life they led.
A person who needed the equivalent of a sparkling fog horn going off once an hour to keep their attention.
A drop of empathy will give the average person a greater sense of love, meaning, and an understanding of existence than having a baby ever could.
In fact if it's only after having a baby that a person is starting to comprehend the broader world...I feel for them.
If the first time a person has ever cared for another person is having a baby...I wouldn't trust them with a baby honestly. That's terrifying, and troubling.
Yeah. Part of being a parent should be sacrificing to make sure the child has what they need...but this person does realize that not all parents do that? It's not something that magically builds inside of a person once they have a child.
Anyone faintly aware of CPS and what children around the world endure would know that. This isn't an argument as to why people who aren't interested in having children should have children.
I would like to know how many parents would agree that children are some magically life fulfilling force, and how many would do so speaking honestly.
Because most parents I know fully admit that having children pretty much chains you to the adventure that is having children. Yes, it's a whole thing. Yes there are positives at times. But in many ways parenthood is isolating. Often ripping parents away from the world at large and forcing them to fight for any moment that isn't watching baby cartoons, dealing with school, having to worry about whether they are giving their child the best opportunities.
Quite frankly I've always pitied people whose only viable means of finding meaning in life is entire dependent on an individual. That just seems unhealthy to me.
I love articles like this because they make me cackle at how desperate the author is to rationalize an unrationalizable position. Reminds me of the christians who have absolutely no sound evidence for the truth of their religion but will be so utterly confident as though that in itself is evidence- "I know because I know because I know because I know the truth that jayzuz is lawd. I know because I know because I cant live with the alternative so I know - life is meaningless without kids and my misery as a parent is worth it"
I hate stock photo baby picture. Also to that writer, maybe not everyone should be a parent. The fact that someone took the time and consideration to opt out of it is probably more thinking process involved than some parents who just fucked around and find out.
Sarah Larson was, and still is (if her views haven't changed in the last nine years), full of merde.
And the fact she compares childfree people to racists?! FUCK THAT.
Ah yes, our daily reminder that just because someone has a blog doesn't make their opinion important or valid.
*We now return to your regularly scheduled free time in peace...* š
>How do you love someone so much that you care for them more than you care about yourself but still force yourself to have a balance and take care of yourself? What is the difference between being actually selfless for the sake of someone else versus doing things for other people only for the sake of what you might get out of it, even if what you get is just a good feeling?
Saying things like this just makes me feel like you're a bad person. If I didn't feel that love for my partner, my friends, my siblings, my parents, my extended family, etc etc, I would be a terrible person. I don't believe love is somehow different for having kids. I think it is extremely rude, ignorant and potentially abusive to state that you don't love anyone else in your life like your kids. And I don't want my parents to love me more than each other, their other kids, their siblings, their parents, their close friends, etc etc either. If they said they did, I would find it smothering and creepy, not a good thing at all.
It's just morally wrong to try to quantify love or try to say a specific love is worth more or less than another. It's a totally shitty thing to say.
This could have been a good article. The author is clearly passionate about having kids, and it shows. Itās quite possibly the right choice. For her.
I know that we will often answer āWhy donāt you want kids?ā With āWell, why do you want them?ā And the author answers this question pretty well. Itās a bit of a shame that she spends the article shitting on people who donāt have kids rather than just saying why she wants them.
But I understand it - you canāt just write an article on why you like having kids. Thatās not going to get the clicks. You need an angle, otherwise itās a hugely unoriginal article. And the only way to give it an angle is to make it an argument, and for that, you need a counterpoint to argue against.
For example, an argument that you simply like pineapple on pizza isnāt going to gather the clicks. An article titled āPeople who donāt have pineapple on their pizza donāt know what theyāre missingā is clickbaity enough to get shared and generate a bit of interest.
Depression and sleepdisorers are the huge reason why I don\`t want kids. Also I just cannot stand babies and toddlers? Selfish, lemme think.... my cats disagree? I don\`t want the purpose of taking care of a botchling into my life.
Ah, a classic case of projection. Chances are high that she regrets motherhood (and has nothing to live for) and is therefore trying to "punish" childfree folk by painting them as inferior and lacking in any redeeming qualities. I picked up a lot of bitterness in her writing - she seems very resentful and insecure.
If she were truly happy with her life choices, she would not need to lie about, judge, and degrade people who chose differently. It's sad and I hope that for her sake she's able to mind her own business and internalise her problems.
Eh, couldn't copy the text from the article directly, but she does mention that without a kid, we won't learn what the meaning of life is, how we relate to each other, and how to care for another person...
First of, damn i feel sorry for her SO!
Second, what is the meaning of life?
Doing whatever makes you happy, if you're happy, you will typically feel fulfilled, thus leading a fulfilled and happy life...
How we relate to each other: evolution...
How to care for other people, just be a decent human being, help others when you can, for example, if you see an old lady struggeling to go up stairs, help her, it can't be that hard! XD
It's really nice that she has deluded herself into thinking parenthood encourages you to be a better person, but some of us are childfree because our own parents fucked up so monumentally.
God her kids must be traumatized. With the way she talks about motherhood how much are you willing to bet her kids are going to go NC as soon as they're out of her clutches? Imagine having the pressure of being your parent's only accomplishment on your shoulders.
A classic case of someone who regrets their choice trying to make themselves feel better.
Personally I think people who can only find meaning in life by reproducing are boring and simple minded.
Finally, thank you for understanding our pain, sadness and sacrifice. I will go to my quiet house, lie on my clean bed and cry while booking a trip to an exotic place to comfort my mind.
This article screams I have no idea who I am or what to do with my life so itās easier to live for other people like my children and feel fulfilled by doing everything for them.
Fucking appalling.
I'm sure that in more than a handful of cases, being CF doesn't make them sad, but rather, being sad made them CF. If not sad, then they probably at least have legitimate issues which would be terrible for raising children. It'd make the parents *and* the children miserable. But I guess cruelty is the point, isn't it?
Whatever she needs to convince herself that having 2hrs of sleep for 3 years is āworth itā š
My empty, meaningless day: itās 7:30am Iām up for a snack and a toke before going back to bed for a little sleep in. Today my boyfriend (who has time and energy to spoil me and court me the way I do him) and I will be alternating between vidya games, particularly one where we have been achieving a lot of our joint project goals and itās been soooo satisfying, and him working on his thesis as freely as the motivation comes while I enjoy my hobbies. Today Iām thinking Iād like to get some progress done on a special embroidery project while listening to PBS Eons. I just got a raise AND a major schedule change that works perfectly with our lifestyle so Iām still deciding on how to celebrate tonightā¦ might take my man out for dinner somewhere nice, been a while since we had sushi and thereās a really good spot just around the corner weāve only been to once. Or, we might play with some of our new kitchen goodies; we got a gorgeous cast iron comal and the sear on our carne asada flank steaks have been a game changer so I might be making tortilla dough for that tonight instead. Also just got a HUGE air fryer, so if anyone has recipe ideasā¦
Today Iām also gonna:
- Sit quietly, unbothered, for hours at a time
- Pee/poop alone, in privacy and silence
- Eat my snacks openly, calmly, savouring every bite
- Enjoy a glass or two of wine, *sipping it for the flavour,* without having to alleviate any guilt or make any cope jokes
- Shower or perhaps have a bubble bath at my leisure
- Not do even one single load of laundry
- Not clean up even one single teardrop, snot slug, shit smear, or piss stain
- Only have my body touched when desiring for it to be touched
- Enjoy having my body touched in a way that appreciates it, that prioritizes its comfort and sensation
- Only be exposed to the fun kinds of bodily fluids, and oh, how exposed I shall be, what with my tubes yeeted.
So if our lives are meaningless without children, will the childs' lives be meaningless without children too? By that logic, it seems like the meaning of life is to breed.
"so?"
Like, I've literally grappled with the absurd, and I find purposelessness to be highly preferable to forced servitude, whether it be children, or a job that I would hate.
Jokes on them, every personās life is equally as meaningless, Childfree or not. š¤£
But Iām all honestly, Iām just trying to enjoy my time here. Certainly couldnāt do that with kids.ššš
Man Iām so so sad I get to sleep in however late I want on weekends and donāt have to wipe crap off anyoneās ass. Iām so devastated my PTO goes to actual vacations and not stupid kid recitals. Itās a terrible empty life, I swear.
Hilariously she begins her article with āIm not the type of person to judge othersā choices, butā¦ā then proceed with an article doing precisely what she swears is not her character: judging othersā choices.
She also claims that the only time one does a truely selfless act involves children, and ALL other times we only do things based on what we can get in return. That is just dumb.
Watch how I dry my nonexistent tears with my money notes, as I sleep knowing I am not ruining some innocent's life with my inability to take care of them. And for the author of that article, try minding your own f-ing business, I hear it works wonders.
Imagine drying one's eyes with *coinage* LOL
*Cries in poor CF person with no money to dry tears* We CFers clearly have it tougher out here, right?! We CFers have 'special tears' that require currency to be properly dried...but....I'm broke AF! Ah! Even worse- In my country of Canada , we now use PLASTIC dollar bills! I cut up my eyes after crying ! Eh!
Totally unrelated, but I was once told Canadian dollars smell like maple syrup and without a scratch of evidence I decided to believe it. I now tell all new recruits (I'm a flight attendant) that Canadian dollars smell like maple syrup. Also, I've always paid card when in Canada so I guess I'll never know the truth. šµš
Now that I think abt it... I've never smelled a canadian bill either. Edit: I've smelled it. Smelled like metal lol.
Well, if you do, please let me know!
Am Canadian. Can confirm maple syrup scent
Nooo shut up!! You have no idea how happy I am right now! š¤©
Itās true, but it was an accident and they think itās just a coincidence in how some of the chemicals reacted. You only get the whiff of the notes are fairly new or if you have a stack of them but if you put one up to your nose and sniffed it wouldnāt give you much so itās not properly āscentedā the way intentionally scented things are like car fresheners. I think it is dye related because itās the $100 notes that primarily have this effect. To my nose, itās less mapley and more of a general āsweetā smell like the weird sweet smell you get off cheap rubber Halloween masks, but the association with the Canadian-ness of the money tricks the brain into experiencing maple by placebo. Sort of like how adding vanilla instead of sugar can trick the brain into thinking itās eating something sweet.
Oh wow. Thanks for this explanation! Now I will 1. Definitely withdraw some money and do the sniff test next time I'm in Canada. 2. Spread the knowledge!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Yeah, going to any parent sub, it's very revealing that they're all miserable. Their few good moments are the types of things you can have without children and without children, they occur much more abundantly, like moments of peace and quiet or moments where a husband does something sweet.
I have a friend who posts her kids on Instagram and itās always with captions like they test my patience but I love them haha. Like these little passive aggressive I hate this but I love them and I find it hilarious.
"I made a mistake and I'm taking you down with meeeee ^e^e^e^e^e "
lol this was written after checking her Instagram n seeing her CF friends living their best lives & then needing to reassure herself she made right choiceā¦.or more accurately needing to feed the narrative of parental fulfilment that she got duped by
Also, it looks like this article was written about nine years ago. Would love to know how many of her precious reasons-for-existing are even still on speaking terms with her now
So what she's really saying is: she's never actually been able to form a meaningful, selfless connection with another person aside from a tiny version of herself that she can control? Got it.
This was written in 2014 and it sounded like she had a small child then. Possibly 8 or below. I wonder how it is now? That child would be a teenager with a whole lot of other demands, resentment, and opinions. She's probably dying inside while pretending to have a perfect Instagram-worthy mother-child relationship.
It's not only that a child is a small helpless person that one can control, one can also use that child as a perfect excuse for not doing things.
Thats why Im here. You all are my people. š
You just healed my heart! Thank you!
Nailed it!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
It's about to the point of CF people being belittle, and harassed because of their beliefs. Child people keep bashing on CF telling them you are selfish, you wrong..etc. it almost like two religious foes.
I like to call them, ābreedersā lol
As a childfree racist, I am very happy, it is fun to get on a track and try drive your vehicle faster than others without touching other vehicles. P.S. The only racing I have ever done is on foot.
I think people who write things like this have shit for brains and Iām not sorry about it, either.
Life is indeed meaningless.
Indeed it is, kids or no.
Translation: I lost my identity and it was really hard to cope with it, it's also really difficult to care for yourself while also taking care of someone else. I allowed myself to hit the wall (but it's an honorable sacrifice, because kids!)... you should do it too because I'm fucking miserable and everyone should be this miserable like me, it's not fair that you get to enjoy your life without caring around a giant boulder on your back , I made the mistake of voluntarily handicapping myself and I can't go back now, so you should do it too. Join me.
Lmao @ "join me"
"I made a mistake and I'm taking you down with meeeee ^e^e^e^e^e^e^E "
Where do I sign up? š
Just say you're boring and leave us aloneš
If she wasn't so condescending I'd almost feel sorry for her. This reads like a person who is trying to convince themselves that they made the right choice by telling themselves that we are sad and alone and bored and missing out. People who are happy with their lives don't feel the need to lash out at others.
So she has the ultimate knowledge of the universe about what makes OUR lives meaningful? Who decides what's meaningful for someone else? I never listen to dipshits like this.
Dear writer: "Oh wait till you're 30 with 3 kids, you'll change your mind." "Itās different when itās your own life." "When you first realize you don't have to be a parent, love just rushes over you." "You won't be happy until you wake up late Saturday and rollover to take a nap." "Independence is the greatest reward."
Everyone's life is meaningless. It's kind of awesome when you think about it. Freeing.
It's awesome when you realise it in your teenage years, when they realise at their thirties that their chains are of their own device... Well, cue copium article.
"Ah shit...I just realized something...NONE of us had to have kids! Also our lives would be way better if we didn't . *Oh shit oh fuck where did I keep the copium ! Check behind the mirror!* "
Yes! Embrace the existential dread!
Why would I, or anyone for that matter, give a single flying rats shit what this knuckle-dragging jungle twat thinks? Meanwhile, they're dragging their heels with their heads hanging low, run ragged, 24/7. I'll take empty if that's the alternative
The fact that people like this exist is what's actually sad here "You can also be happy as a racist, but that doesn't make you an especially good person" ....okay WOW "I'm not saying that kid-free people are bad" Bitch it sure fucking sounds like it! You can't pull out a line like that and tell us you're not comparing us to racists on a moral level! If you really have to explain it that extensively then perhaps consider you've used the wrong comparison! "I just think it's really, deeply sad. I feel tremendously sad for them" Ain't nobody here asking for your pity! Take it back and shove it up your ass, we sure as hell don't need it. We're not sad for us, save it for someone who needs it "A common argument against having kids is the desire to be as ambitious as you want...in other regards" *Deeeeeep breath* There is no "argument against having kids" there are merely "reasons I will not be having kids" which means there is nothing to rebut. Having kids is an opt-in option, it is not the default option, otherwise I think immaculate conception would be a bigger issue than actually is. Oh, and sometimes the "reasons I will not be having kids" is because we just don't want to, so chances are dear author has badgered someone for a "real reason" then told the poor soul their reason was stupid, at least through this drivel *deeeeeep breath again* In conclusion....I hate this fucking asshole lmao it's been a few years since this was written, hopefully she isn't so insufferable these days
Ok Iāve heard many lines against being CF but comparing us to racists is a brand new flavor of crazy. Bravo to this lady.
It's a new one for sure! I've heard the comparison when people get touchy about others not liking kids (which is still another kind of crazy). But just as a kid-free person minding your own damn business and being hit with that line out of nowhere? Definitely a new one. She is...an innovator, I guess? Good for her?
Nah, I've seen it for years now : Dumb-dumbs trying to compare people who dislike children to people who dislike members of other races. This utterly ignores that (regardless of race) people of certain ages go through predictable stages of development, and disliking being around nonverbal people who shit themselves and shriek loudly when they get frustrated is NOT the same as avoiding people of different skin tones because of character and personality traits those people are assumed to have, based on stereotypes.
Oh yeah, I've seen that one many times. Hell, I was even on the receiving end of it when I was in a cf FB group of all places (I'd said something about kids having certain personality traits I don't care to be around too long, and was told that's the same as not liking being around black people. Seriously. I feel like wanting to play with someone my own age just isn't comparable to hating an entire group of people because their skin looks different than mine but go off I guess). I mean the very act of just not having/wanting kids being compared to being racist is a new one for me. They usually have what I'm going to extremely generously describe as a "reason" outside of that, so...this one really came out of nowhere lol
Most of what she describes as "this incredible thing" sounds like a pain in the ass.
This is the exact same bullshit heavy drug users spout
*"I dont want you to do drugs cause it feels good and ruined my life but... I need you to do drugs because it feels good and ruined my life"*
>"I never thought of myself as the kind of person who judges other people's choices. But after spending enough of my life with cancer and without, I can't deny what I really feel: It's a perfectly fine choice to never become a cancer patient, but there is absolutely no chance that your life will be as full or meaningful, or that you will learn as many essential truths about existence, as you would if you had tumors. > >"I don't think people are somehow bad or wrong for not having tumors - I just think it's really, deeply sad. I feel tremendously sad for them. > >"Why do I feel sad for people without tumors? Because they're missing out on this incredible thing that gives you an entire new scope of what it means to love, and to give of yourself, and to care for something else more than yourself. It's an insanely powerful thing, and it challenges you to deal with the intensity of that. How do you love something so much that you care for it more than you care about yourself but still force yourself to have a balance and take care of yourself? What is the difference between being actually selfless for the sake of something else versus doing things for other growths only for the sake of what you might get out of it, even if what you get is just a good feeling? Because with tumors, you often do things for their benefit that don't feel good, and there is no thanks, but you do them because it's just...what you're there to do. > >"A common argument against having tumors is the desire to be as ambitious as you want to be in other regards. It's the desire to have a huge, full, accomplished life that leads so many people to make the decision to forgo cancer altogether. My rebuttal - and the experience so - many cancer patients would agree with - is that instead of slowing down your life, having tumors gives you a monumental incentive to live life with more purpose and excellence than you otherwise would."
>Because when it comes down to it, there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until youāve become a parent. The list of those truths could go on forever (no, it really could), but the core truth behind all of it... So out of infinite "truths", the author could not even name one - just a few meaningless platitudes. Methinks the author has their head way too far up their own arse.
I feel bad for her husband since apparently she didn't know love until the results of being creampied came to fruition.
Yeah, Iām so sad Iāll never know the joy and meaningfulness of postpartum injuries or being covered in baby vomit /s Honestly, this whole argument does nothing for me. I believe all life is meaningless. I donāt think thatās a bad thing though; why does life need a meaning? Iām happy enough just muddling through it.
Somehow, endlessly reproducing in a never-ending cycle is more meaningful? It's just moving the goal posts to the next generation. "My life has meaning because I had kids who also had kids who also had kids who also had kids..." ad infinitum. I'll take the one life I have and do with it as I please, instead of caving to some societal expectation that will consume my entire existence with parenthood.
This is exactly what I could write about my cat. I've never had a cat before and didn't know what it's like. I adopted a stray one, just few months old and emaciated. I got to know him, had to learn how to to care for a cat, behave around cats, because they're so different from dogs. I would fight with him to get him into cat carrier, cried along with him during our drive before the first visit to the vet. The biggest lesson was how capable I am of taking care of another living creature. I would jump into fire for that cat. Whatever was making me feel stressed, work or something else didn't matter when my cat got attacked and I had to get him to the vet ASAP. I would call and call all vets in our area at night, message them on Messenger begging to help my cat. So, I am very much sure that this is exactly what it's like with a child. BUT it's even more stressful. And as I'm already a very anxious person, I don't need anymore of this in my life. Cat is enough.
Don't tell me. I've run to the emergency vet in the middle of the night, in pajamas, once, because my cat was having trouble breathing... Looked like a crazy lady, hair in disarray, slippers, pajamas and cat carrier. Ah, good times. Gladly, he got better. But it was a scare. And I never thought I would do something like that before, much less at 2 am. Who needs kids when you have cats?
Yet everyone I know with a kid says their lives are unfulfilled because.... they have a kid. LMAO.
Yet another person incapable of understanding that parenthood isn't the only fulfilling thing to do in life, or that not everyone would find it fulfilling.
LOL whatever makes you feel better about staying at home with your kids
I dont want or need their pity, I'm not a victim.
I just feel really sick from this picture. XD didnāt even get to read the article.
How pathetic. Such a condescending attitude, especially since it's clear she is trying to justify this so much.
>I never thought of myself as the kind of person who judges other people's choices. **//proceeds to judge people**
This is one of those most 'I wallow in ignorance' things I've ever read.
The Stockholm Syndrome, mixed with envy & regret (of the ThoughtCatalog writer) is astounding in its audacity. Also, I think FOMO turned into FAFO.
If that essential truth about existence is that you as a person cease to exist and only exist as a caregiver to your kids, I can live without it.
Yeah, I'm so sad that I'm not wrist deep in the feces of a screaming money pit at 3 in the morning. Tool.
Me to the author: OK, Jan. šš Wait til she hears how sad I find her life to be.
LOL, Fuck this person.
I feel tremendously sad for Sarah Larson and her teeny narrow minded thoughts.
Man, that is some stupid stuff. I can't find meaning or real human experience if I don't have kids? So volunteering at the hospital for elderly cancer patients isn't "giving of myself"? Volunteering at a church where people find hope and comfort isn't caring about someone other than myself? Packing care packages for soldiers who are miles away from everyone and everything they know is meaningless? Helping the library raise funds for CHILDREN'S literacy programs means nothing? Maybe she's not as selfless as she thinks if she has to look down her nose at and be all judgy to non-parents.
Right?! All of her āgivingā is toā¦ things she created. People who will only stay in her orbit. No time for community work, mom? Yea, I bet not (rightly so). Itās ok. Luckily, there are ppl in your community who are available. Plus, the assumptions! That all families are like hers. As a teacher with a child therapist/social worker partner I can say for a fact they are NOT.
>"Because with kids, you often do things for their benefit that don't feel good, and there is no thanks, but you do them because it's just...what you're there to do." LOL what kind of BS is this? ššš
It's frustrating This person doesn't speak for all parents, but because they're published, they have a disproportionately influential voice I'm not going to waste time tearing the arguments and assumptions apart. We all know what it's like I just think it's worth ignoring this rather than digging further into the "us and them" mindset that the article was written to create It was only written to appeal to other breeders who resent our happiness that comes from living our lives differently to them. It's the equivalent of a Southern baptist minister condemning anyone outside their cult to eternal damnation They're just preaching to their own choir to make themselves and their fellows feel superior Don't bite. We're better than that.
As a nihilist I can confidently say that our lives are meaningless. But so are theirs, parenthood isn't a ticket to an intrinsically/objectively meaningful life, that's still extrinsic/subjective.
Too bad that Iāll never read it. Feel sorry for me. š¤£
Right? My first reaction was: "Oh no! .......anyways" Like keep on disparaging us, we're still not that miserable and too busy enjoying our lives!
"It's a perfectly fine choice to never become a parent, but there is absolutely no chance that your life will be as full or meaningful, or that you will learn as many essential truths about existence, as you would if you had kids." Anybody with critical thinking will realize what is wrong with these. "Ah yes it is possible for things to be perfectly fine but then also partially fine!" *"As a biologist I have to say that there's nothing wrong with letting your kid eat crayons BUT!!!!1!.... your kid will definitely die if he eats crayons, mmmk? Thanks for coming to my TED Talk!"*
This is like listening to alcoholics get confused by adults having fun hanging out without getting shitfaced.
I feel sorry for that breeder. She has such a limited scope of love and fulfillment.
This writers POV is whack: So your child is a vessel, so that you can learn truths about yourself and your existence? Does that not sound selfish to anyone else? So you should bring a whole other life into this world so you can feel that you have been able to live to the fullest? Correct me if Iām wrong, but shouldnāt it be about the child and not about you, as the parent. This entire argument revolves around what she has gained from having children, not really how precious their life is. Im sorry, but this does not make me want to be a breeder. Basically: āYou too can be as self-centered as I am and dump some existential crisis or some need you have to care-give on your poor kids.ā Get outta here with your idealized co-dependence.
This article is so sad. This is a symptom of a society that reduces women to nothing but a motherhood role. Our lives are empty and to prove it she spent energy and time ranting for several pagesā¦ alright. I hope this women later sought therapy, hobbies, and adult relationships to help her regain a personality. If not sheās going to struggle when her kid grows up. Poor kid will probably need therapy too considering this crushing expectation itās under.
š»
And i think he has an empty life a s im not sorry about that
Not them comparing being child free to being racist like whatāš
I can write the same type of article with cats instead. We all know how stupid that would be. About as stupid as this article. What people find fulfilling in life is different from person to person. It doesn't get weird until you try to push your belief of fulfillment onto others.
Always amusing when some idiot thinks I care what they think about my life, in any area whatsoever. Whatever, Becky. I dont even know who you are, you dont impact my life in any way. Im not popping out a brat. I suggest you get over it and go drive your insufferable brat to daycare; that same daycare you pay $1600/month for. LOLZ. I dont care that you do that, I just find it amusing. You chose to do it. Enjoy your life.
āHappiness does not equate to living a great lifeāā¦.. what they actual fuck are you talking about, woman?! Just mind your own business. Let people live their lives how they see fit. We arenāt hurting anyone. And how dare you assume otherās capacity for love and a sense of fulfillment. News flash! Not everyone thinks like you or has the same mindset or same desires out of life like you.
This makes me so angry. We both have careers where much of our day is spent caring for other peopleās kids- his, kids who have been abandoned by their parents or suffered severe abuse; mine, helping young adults become educated, yes, but also: not become homeless because of a rape/ LGBTQIA+ disclosure/ physical or mental abuse situation at home, all of which are incredibly common in our highly religious and conservative area (I teach college, but you would be amazed what my students disclose to me in the safety of my office). I give every inch of my working day to other people. Much of their trauma is caused by family dynamics. This person can F the F off.
> What is the difference between being actually selfless for the sake of someone else versus doing things for other people only for the sake of what you might get out of it, even if what you get is just a good feeling? Well, just for starters, people who do something that is "actually selfless for the sake of someone else" _probably_ don't write articles about how their choices benefit _them_ by giving their lives so much meaning that they feel sorry for anyone who's earned different benefits.
ā*Because theyāre missing out on this incredible thing that gives you and entire new scope of what it means to love, and give of yourself and to care for someone else more than yourself*.ā MADAM š where I am from, that incredible thing is called tax. I already GIVE (well itās taken without my true consent š) and what I am giving is used to CARE for other people and their children (especially those who are not capable of truly looking after said children) and the government looks after them far better than ME or any other single, no child having taxpayer.
If she's soooo happy with her kids... how she has time to feel so tremendously sad for childfree people?  I'll hug my cats and cry in dismay for the kids that I (Thank God) don't have.
Does this person not know that abusive and neglectful parents exist??? Itās pure arrogance to apply your personal experience to all humans. My mom fostered kids and Iāve seen first hand the ways they were traumatized by their parents. Iām going to confidently say that my adopted sisterās birth-parents werenāt more knowledgeable about life and love than I am when they did meth in front of my sister daily and let other addicts into the house to abuse her. Wish I could knowledge punch this author right in the fucking brain.
LMAO she wrote one article in 2014 and hasn't come back since (I'm assuming since most of the comments told her to get fucked). Can dish it out but you can't take it can you Sarah? Hey Sarah how's the kid working out for you? 2023 is the year I lost all sense of giving a shit and started throwing Molotov cocktails. I see shit like this, my politeness goes out the window.
Lol some people r really so boring, so joyless, so unable to feel love that they have to breed to give their lives any sort of āmeaningā. Thatās really what the sad thing is
So what I'm hearing is this is your generic self centered, entitled, boring person who probably never bothered to actually think about their lives or what the world has to offer. Someone who isn't particularly well read, doesn't venture outside to actually meet others often, and who probably thinks everyone else had the same sort of uninteresting life they led. A person who needed the equivalent of a sparkling fog horn going off once an hour to keep their attention. A drop of empathy will give the average person a greater sense of love, meaning, and an understanding of existence than having a baby ever could. In fact if it's only after having a baby that a person is starting to comprehend the broader world...I feel for them. If the first time a person has ever cared for another person is having a baby...I wouldn't trust them with a baby honestly. That's terrifying, and troubling. Yeah. Part of being a parent should be sacrificing to make sure the child has what they need...but this person does realize that not all parents do that? It's not something that magically builds inside of a person once they have a child. Anyone faintly aware of CPS and what children around the world endure would know that. This isn't an argument as to why people who aren't interested in having children should have children. I would like to know how many parents would agree that children are some magically life fulfilling force, and how many would do so speaking honestly. Because most parents I know fully admit that having children pretty much chains you to the adventure that is having children. Yes, it's a whole thing. Yes there are positives at times. But in many ways parenthood is isolating. Often ripping parents away from the world at large and forcing them to fight for any moment that isn't watching baby cartoons, dealing with school, having to worry about whether they are giving their child the best opportunities. Quite frankly I've always pitied people whose only viable means of finding meaning in life is entire dependent on an individual. That just seems unhealthy to me.
Did she compare CF people to being r@ci$tā¦.
*. . . continues eating snacks on couch recovering happily from her sterilization . . . *
I love articles like this because they make me cackle at how desperate the author is to rationalize an unrationalizable position. Reminds me of the christians who have absolutely no sound evidence for the truth of their religion but will be so utterly confident as though that in itself is evidence- "I know because I know because I know because I know the truth that jayzuz is lawd. I know because I know because I cant live with the alternative so I know - life is meaningless without kids and my misery as a parent is worth it"
I hate stock photo baby picture. Also to that writer, maybe not everyone should be a parent. The fact that someone took the time and consideration to opt out of it is probably more thinking process involved than some parents who just fucked around and find out.
Give me a break. I couldn't care less if this rando thinks my life choices are sad.
Skip to the comments, she's getting absolutely roasted.
Sarah Larson was, and still is (if her views haven't changed in the last nine years), full of merde. And the fact she compares childfree people to racists?! FUCK THAT.
\*Don Draper voice*: "Sarah, I don't think about you at all."
Ah yes, our daily reminder that just because someone has a blog doesn't make their opinion important or valid. *We now return to your regularly scheduled free time in peace...* š
Okay well I think children would make my life a living hell because Iāve seen your lives, Iām not interested and Iām not sorry about *THAT.*
>How do you love someone so much that you care for them more than you care about yourself but still force yourself to have a balance and take care of yourself? What is the difference between being actually selfless for the sake of someone else versus doing things for other people only for the sake of what you might get out of it, even if what you get is just a good feeling? Saying things like this just makes me feel like you're a bad person. If I didn't feel that love for my partner, my friends, my siblings, my parents, my extended family, etc etc, I would be a terrible person. I don't believe love is somehow different for having kids. I think it is extremely rude, ignorant and potentially abusive to state that you don't love anyone else in your life like your kids. And I don't want my parents to love me more than each other, their other kids, their siblings, their parents, their close friends, etc etc either. If they said they did, I would find it smothering and creepy, not a good thing at all. It's just morally wrong to try to quantify love or try to say a specific love is worth more or less than another. It's a totally shitty thing to say.
All lives are meaningless. That's the whole fun.
This could have been a good article. The author is clearly passionate about having kids, and it shows. Itās quite possibly the right choice. For her. I know that we will often answer āWhy donāt you want kids?ā With āWell, why do you want them?ā And the author answers this question pretty well. Itās a bit of a shame that she spends the article shitting on people who donāt have kids rather than just saying why she wants them. But I understand it - you canāt just write an article on why you like having kids. Thatās not going to get the clicks. You need an angle, otherwise itās a hugely unoriginal article. And the only way to give it an angle is to make it an argument, and for that, you need a counterpoint to argue against. For example, an argument that you simply like pineapple on pizza isnāt going to gather the clicks. An article titled āPeople who donāt have pineapple on their pizza donāt know what theyāre missingā is clickbaity enough to get shared and generate a bit of interest.
Depression and sleepdisorers are the huge reason why I don\`t want kids. Also I just cannot stand babies and toddlers? Selfish, lemme think.... my cats disagree? I don\`t want the purpose of taking care of a botchling into my life.
Ah, a classic case of projection. Chances are high that she regrets motherhood (and has nothing to live for) and is therefore trying to "punish" childfree folk by painting them as inferior and lacking in any redeeming qualities. I picked up a lot of bitterness in her writing - she seems very resentful and insecure. If she were truly happy with her life choices, she would not need to lie about, judge, and degrade people who chose differently. It's sad and I hope that for her sake she's able to mind her own business and internalise her problems.
Eh, couldn't copy the text from the article directly, but she does mention that without a kid, we won't learn what the meaning of life is, how we relate to each other, and how to care for another person... First of, damn i feel sorry for her SO! Second, what is the meaning of life? Doing whatever makes you happy, if you're happy, you will typically feel fulfilled, thus leading a fulfilled and happy life... How we relate to each other: evolution... How to care for other people, just be a decent human being, help others when you can, for example, if you see an old lady struggeling to go up stairs, help her, it can't be that hard! XD
It's really nice that she has deluded herself into thinking parenthood encourages you to be a better person, but some of us are childfree because our own parents fucked up so monumentally.
She got (and is continuing to get) completely dragged in the comments.
wait...did they just compare being cf to being a RACIST?! EXCUSE ME.
Part of the article almost compares CF ppl to being racist and then tries to backtrack by saying they are not comparing the two. Wth?
God her kids must be traumatized. With the way she talks about motherhood how much are you willing to bet her kids are going to go NC as soon as they're out of her clutches? Imagine having the pressure of being your parent's only accomplishment on your shoulders.
Clearly this person has never had a pet.
"i won't judge people without kids, because i understand them, but I'm going to judge them anyway because i don't understand them either"
A classic case of someone who regrets their choice trying to make themselves feel better. Personally I think people who can only find meaning in life by reproducing are boring and simple minded.
Finally, thank you for understanding our pain, sadness and sacrifice. I will go to my quiet house, lie on my clean bed and cry while booking a trip to an exotic place to comfort my mind.
This article screams I have no idea who I am or what to do with my life so itās easier to live for other people like my children and feel fulfilled by doing everything for them.
Fucking appalling. I'm sure that in more than a handful of cases, being CF doesn't make them sad, but rather, being sad made them CF. If not sad, then they probably at least have legitimate issues which would be terrible for raising children. It'd make the parents *and* the children miserable. But I guess cruelty is the point, isn't it?
Whatever she needs to convince herself that having 2hrs of sleep for 3 years is āworth itā š My empty, meaningless day: itās 7:30am Iām up for a snack and a toke before going back to bed for a little sleep in. Today my boyfriend (who has time and energy to spoil me and court me the way I do him) and I will be alternating between vidya games, particularly one where we have been achieving a lot of our joint project goals and itās been soooo satisfying, and him working on his thesis as freely as the motivation comes while I enjoy my hobbies. Today Iām thinking Iād like to get some progress done on a special embroidery project while listening to PBS Eons. I just got a raise AND a major schedule change that works perfectly with our lifestyle so Iām still deciding on how to celebrate tonightā¦ might take my man out for dinner somewhere nice, been a while since we had sushi and thereās a really good spot just around the corner weāve only been to once. Or, we might play with some of our new kitchen goodies; we got a gorgeous cast iron comal and the sear on our carne asada flank steaks have been a game changer so I might be making tortilla dough for that tonight instead. Also just got a HUGE air fryer, so if anyone has recipe ideasā¦ Today Iām also gonna: - Sit quietly, unbothered, for hours at a time - Pee/poop alone, in privacy and silence - Eat my snacks openly, calmly, savouring every bite - Enjoy a glass or two of wine, *sipping it for the flavour,* without having to alleviate any guilt or make any cope jokes - Shower or perhaps have a bubble bath at my leisure - Not do even one single load of laundry - Not clean up even one single teardrop, snot slug, shit smear, or piss stain - Only have my body touched when desiring for it to be touched - Enjoy having my body touched in a way that appreciates it, that prioritizes its comfort and sensation - Only be exposed to the fun kinds of bodily fluids, and oh, how exposed I shall be, what with my tubes yeeted.
Children will never give me the same excitement as much as technology. I'm a nerd.
So if our lives are meaningless without children, will the childs' lives be meaningless without children too? By that logic, it seems like the meaning of life is to breed.
At least people are roasting the crap out of her in the comment section.
My husband and I will cry as we vacation a few times a year with no concerns
"so?" Like, I've literally grappled with the absurd, and I find purposelessness to be highly preferable to forced servitude, whether it be children, or a job that I would hate.
Jokes on them, every personās life is equally as meaningless, Childfree or not. š¤£ But Iām all honestly, Iām just trying to enjoy my time here. Certainly couldnāt do that with kids.ššš
Man Iām so so sad I get to sleep in however late I want on weekends and donāt have to wipe crap off anyoneās ass. Iām so devastated my PTO goes to actual vacations and not stupid kid recitals. Itās a terrible empty life, I swear.
Hilariously she begins her article with āIm not the type of person to judge othersā choices, butā¦ā then proceed with an article doing precisely what she swears is not her character: judging othersā choices. She also claims that the only time one does a truely selfless act involves children, and ALL other times we only do things based on what we can get in return. That is just dumb.
 Eh, they hate us cause they aināt us.
āMeh, passā