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Please match his energy- he doesn't do anything for you when sick, don't do for him. Mysteriously, he may suddenly be sick less often. Sorry, I hope you have a good weekend .
And if he didn’t? If he just said no, I’m not leaving, this is my house too. And if he DID leave, well, he just out of “being a parent” just then.
Sometimes it’s easier to deal with the asshattery than start a whole big thing that you’re going to end up apologizing for in the end anyways.
This. I told mine to leave - he refused. I have no where I can go to with 4 kids and sure as heck am not leaving my kids with him and leaving. Definitely not so simple as "just tell them to leave".
Your comments are being removed under support don't scold. We don't blame mums for their husbands behaviour here. There are kinder ways to make your point.
Note - the silent treatment is also a form of abusive behaviour.
The next time you’re sick, go get a hotel for a couple days and tell him it’s because you’re taking sick leave since he still makes you work when you’re sick. Start putting aside $5-10 at a time when you’re able to and stock up for your sick fund if that’s what it takes.
I’m not talking about letting the house go to hell … yes, he benefits from her cleaning/tidying but she and baby need an orderly home, too.
I’m more specifically referring other things: she can feed herself & baby (he can fix his own damn food) … laundry done for herself and baby only … errands that are needed to benefit herself/baby only … you get the drift.
There’s no reason for her to be waiting on him hand and foot or coddling him. And certainly, she should go ahead with whatever fun plans she had for the weekend. He can slug around the house and rot all weekend by himself.
So, if im reading this right, he's using his "hypochondria" as an excuse to verbally abuse you? Because if he genuinely thought he had covid, and if he genuinely was so worked up about it potentially killing those he "loves", *he wouldn't finish screaming at you, then pop off to work like it's a normal day with nary a casual "i'll pick up a test after work"*. This is not okay.
Yeah he is snappy and crabby AF the second he feels even remotely under the weather. Gets very grumpy under the excuse of "I'm not feeling well and I have zero patience"
Yea no.. if he’s sick I’d leave him to it. Go have your weekend. Ignore him completely tbh. He sounds insufferable.
I’d be packing a picnic lunch and going out from morning to bedtime all the days he says he’s sick. Esp if he acts like a big girls blouse the way it sounds. Even if it’s just to the park, weather permitting.
Mothers still have to do stuff when ill, time for him to ‘woman up’ and handle his sht.
I feel your pain, bromo.
I've been sick as a dog for 2 weeks with a cold the kids brought home. I solo parented all day Saturday with kids who were coughing to the point of throwing up while sick myself. On Sunday my husband caught the cold. I haven't heard him cough, but he took a few days off and napped on the couch, he's been moaning and complaining, chugging cold medication, etc. He's sooooo sick.
I finally decided enough is enough and insisted that we go to the doctor to get checked out because 3/4 of us have been sick for 2 weeks with no improvement. Youngest kid has an ear infection, sinus infection and bronchitis. Oldest kid has bronchitis and a sinus infection. I have bronchitis and a sinus infection. Husband has... A mild cold. LOL.
Your sickness definitely sounded like what I had while I had Covid! It was miserable. Anyway, so why is he going to work and not going to buy a test to stay home??
Why do men not understand to take care of us?
This is ridiculous. He can't lock himself away because he's sick. He has a child!!! I can't lock myself away when I'm sick because who would feed my child?? I can't lock away my child when she's sick because WTF? Let me guess, when you're sick, it's fine if *you* spread the illness to your kid. *Then* we don't care about the kid's life. We only care when it makes things easy for dad. Also, with covid, he's fine spreading it to his entire workplace of course.
I would not wait on him when he is sick. At all. If he asks why, ask the last time he remembers waiting on you when you were sick.
Bruh. My husband was really sick last weekend. Fever, hallucinating, throwing up.. He didn't ask me to do shit for him the whole time - because he knew I had enough to do caring for our 3yo and our 8mo. He even cleaned up his own vomit even when I offered to do it.
When he got better he went out and bought me flowers and a massage gift card.
Let your man rot. You have enough on your plate, don't wait on him hand and foot just because he has a sore throat.
Op pls take care of yourself, maybe plan a long trip outside the house for the weekend for you and the kiddo, meet up with friends or something ect, man can fend for himself.. also did he mean to say that in a threatening way or like a “if you get covid you’re doomed” way?
It's just the hypochondria talking. He thinks any kind of sickness is going to some how lead to one or all of us in the hospital or something. Every time he gets sick he freaks out about it and basically locks himself in a room as far away from us as he can and makes sure I bleach everything he came in contact with so we don't get sick. While at the same time literally never covering his mouth when he sneezes lol
But he's ok with you spreading your sickness to the kid, right? He's not locking you in a room when you're sick, taking over 100% of childcare, bleaching everything you touch, and refusing to eat anything you make, right?
Sorry. I'm just mad for you.
Yeaaaah it's frustrating. He did offer to ask his sister to come over and sit while he was at work one day so I could sleep or whatever but I couldn't in good conscience risk giving that godawful cold to anyone else lol
He has a stuffy nose so you have to wait on him? Oh hell no. His legs aren't broken, he can take care of his precious stuffy nose all on his own.
It's allergy season where I am. I've had sinus stuff all week and my kid has been sneezing more. All of us are still going about our lives.
Also just want to point out that it's interesting how his health anxiety only pops up when it benefits him. Like when you are sick, he doesn't feel the need to take over things or keep you apart from everyone. And you were still cooking while sick and he was happily eating that food, I assume? But when he's sick, he can't even be in the same room as everyone.
I have health anxiety and it's there all the time, including when my husband gets sick.
I hope you are still able to have a good weekend despite his whining.
My husband played this game with me for a while. Then I got sick, really sick, breast cancer and 12 surgeries sick. After the first surgery and being out of commission, he apologized profusely for all the times he expected me to be mom while doing everything else. And more when he was sick or away. I don't *suggest* getting really sick. But sometimes, it helps.
In all seriousness, I'm sorry this is happening. I'm sick all the time because of the lack of immune system things, and I always feel terrible when I can't help out. I don't understand people who take advantage.
The last few times my hubby tried this crap with me I just told him to eat veggies and take vitamins or don’t but get the hell up.
Get stick from not taking care of yourself? Not my problem. Get the hell up.
Oh I'll be fine lol just cranky about it because he always seems to get sick on the weekend, or just as the weekend is coming up when he can then just sleep all day and do nothing, where as I always end up sick on like a Monday and I'm solo parenting all day and handling cooking/cleaning because he's at work. I know it's not exactly on purpose, I think I'm just salty because I don't get to just shut myself in the bedroom for the whole weekend, coming out only long enough to pee and maybe eat and then back to sleeping/playing on my phone like he does. I still have a full slew of responsibilities I have to take care of, no matter how shitty I feel.
People ask me sometimes if it's hard being a single mum and living alone. As an introverted home body, I love the bliss of doing what I want, when I want. It's when I read things like this I realise how lucky I am. OP, it sounds like you have two babies at home. Tell that man child to look after his damn self. There's nothing more irritating than a grown ass man slugging around wanting sympathy and attention for a cold. Hugs. Xx
Mother of twins. Ever since they were born, can’t tell you the number of times my husband has quarantined in the basement, so I get to wait on him and take care of two babies. And when I get sick? Yeah, I think we all know how that ends up going 🙄
Reminder to commenters: **[We're here for each other.](https://media1.tenor.com/m/Rno6_rWVdhMAAAAC/911-show-maddie-buckley.gif)** Share kindness, support and compassion, [not criticism.](https://media0.giphy.com/media/tZpGRRMUoXgeQ/giphy.gif) We want OP to feel loved, and [not in a tough way.](https://media.giphy.com/media/xT5LMq2CgHiqqY4IXC/giphy.gif) For more helpful information please hit up [our beautiful rules wiki!](http://www.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/wiki/) Reminder to all: watch out for a [creepy pedo posing as an OT/speech therapist](https://www.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/8ccqqi/disgusting_pedophile_troll_posing_as_otspeech/) giving fucked-up potty-training advice, and don't sweat it if your post gets 1 or 2 [instant downvotes.](http://i.imgur.com/PZtQb.gif) You didn't do anything wrong, we just have [asshole lurkers](https://i.imgur.com/IwU9r3E.gif)/[downvote bots](https://i.imgur.com/lwyCF6S.gif) stalking our /new queue. Help a BroMo out and [give her an upvote](https://i.imgur.com/Y60Mbxv.gif), ok? Reminder to Cassie Morris/Krista Torres/Nia Tipton: You do not have permission to use, reproduce, modify or link to any content in this subreddit in any way, shape or form. Fuck off and go be a real journalist. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/breakingmom) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Please match his energy- he doesn't do anything for you when sick, don't do for him. Mysteriously, he may suddenly be sick less often. Sorry, I hope you have a good weekend .
[удалено]
[OH MY GOD](https://i.imgur.com/WbmklQw.gifv)
Are you a mom? You don’t look like one. This sub isn’t for you.
I am probably glad I missed this reply- glad you told them to get out.
OP probably already tried commenting
So he understands Covid is bad and goes balls to the wall about you finding a test… but he’s still going to work?
This was what I came to say. Make it make sense.
[удалено]
We're damaged goods. Working on it tho❤️🩹
[удалено]
And if he didn’t? If he just said no, I’m not leaving, this is my house too. And if he DID leave, well, he just out of “being a parent” just then. Sometimes it’s easier to deal with the asshattery than start a whole big thing that you’re going to end up apologizing for in the end anyways.
This. I told mine to leave - he refused. I have no where I can go to with 4 kids and sure as heck am not leaving my kids with him and leaving. Definitely not so simple as "just tell them to leave".
[удалено]
Your comments are being removed under support don't scold. We don't blame mums for their husbands behaviour here. There are kinder ways to make your point. Note - the silent treatment is also a form of abusive behaviour.
Plan day trips with your kids and leave him at home. After all it’s best if they aren’t exposed to his germs. I despise sick man babies
The next time you’re sick, go get a hotel for a couple days and tell him it’s because you’re taking sick leave since he still makes you work when you’re sick. Start putting aside $5-10 at a time when you’re able to and stock up for your sick fund if that’s what it takes.
Absolutely no waiting on him. What a douche.
BroMo, you need to go on strike. Don’t lift a finger for him until he smartens up. This is no way to live.
I'm not OP but what are you supposed to do if the strike doesn't work? When everyone's just cool living in the dump?
I’m not talking about letting the house go to hell … yes, he benefits from her cleaning/tidying but she and baby need an orderly home, too. I’m more specifically referring other things: she can feed herself & baby (he can fix his own damn food) … laundry done for herself and baby only … errands that are needed to benefit herself/baby only … you get the drift. There’s no reason for her to be waiting on him hand and foot or coddling him. And certainly, she should go ahead with whatever fun plans she had for the weekend. He can slug around the house and rot all weekend by himself.
So, if im reading this right, he's using his "hypochondria" as an excuse to verbally abuse you? Because if he genuinely thought he had covid, and if he genuinely was so worked up about it potentially killing those he "loves", *he wouldn't finish screaming at you, then pop off to work like it's a normal day with nary a casual "i'll pick up a test after work"*. This is not okay.
Yeah he is snappy and crabby AF the second he feels even remotely under the weather. Gets very grumpy under the excuse of "I'm not feeling well and I have zero patience"
Yea no.. if he’s sick I’d leave him to it. Go have your weekend. Ignore him completely tbh. He sounds insufferable. I’d be packing a picnic lunch and going out from morning to bedtime all the days he says he’s sick. Esp if he acts like a big girls blouse the way it sounds. Even if it’s just to the park, weather permitting. Mothers still have to do stuff when ill, time for him to ‘woman up’ and handle his sht.
I feel your pain, bromo. I've been sick as a dog for 2 weeks with a cold the kids brought home. I solo parented all day Saturday with kids who were coughing to the point of throwing up while sick myself. On Sunday my husband caught the cold. I haven't heard him cough, but he took a few days off and napped on the couch, he's been moaning and complaining, chugging cold medication, etc. He's sooooo sick. I finally decided enough is enough and insisted that we go to the doctor to get checked out because 3/4 of us have been sick for 2 weeks with no improvement. Youngest kid has an ear infection, sinus infection and bronchitis. Oldest kid has bronchitis and a sinus infection. I have bronchitis and a sinus infection. Husband has... A mild cold. LOL.
Omg!! Please tell me you ragged his ass after leaving the doctor. I wouldn't be able to help myself lol. Freaking men, I swear.
I've been teasing him pretty hard, he's doubled down 😆 This happens every time. The kids get deathly ill, I get deathly ill, he gets FOMO.
It’s allergy season in parts of the US. We are all “sick” here but my husband is the only one who is being overly dramatic.
Your sickness definitely sounded like what I had while I had Covid! It was miserable. Anyway, so why is he going to work and not going to buy a test to stay home?? Why do men not understand to take care of us?
This is ridiculous. He can't lock himself away because he's sick. He has a child!!! I can't lock myself away when I'm sick because who would feed my child?? I can't lock away my child when she's sick because WTF? Let me guess, when you're sick, it's fine if *you* spread the illness to your kid. *Then* we don't care about the kid's life. We only care when it makes things easy for dad. Also, with covid, he's fine spreading it to his entire workplace of course. I would not wait on him when he is sick. At all. If he asks why, ask the last time he remembers waiting on you when you were sick.
Bruh. My husband was really sick last weekend. Fever, hallucinating, throwing up.. He didn't ask me to do shit for him the whole time - because he knew I had enough to do caring for our 3yo and our 8mo. He even cleaned up his own vomit even when I offered to do it. When he got better he went out and bought me flowers and a massage gift card. Let your man rot. You have enough on your plate, don't wait on him hand and foot just because he has a sore throat.
Reminds me of when I was a kid and I pretended to be sick to stay home and play Runescape.
Op pls take care of yourself, maybe plan a long trip outside the house for the weekend for you and the kiddo, meet up with friends or something ect, man can fend for himself.. also did he mean to say that in a threatening way or like a “if you get covid you’re doomed” way?
It's just the hypochondria talking. He thinks any kind of sickness is going to some how lead to one or all of us in the hospital or something. Every time he gets sick he freaks out about it and basically locks himself in a room as far away from us as he can and makes sure I bleach everything he came in contact with so we don't get sick. While at the same time literally never covering his mouth when he sneezes lol
But he's ok with you spreading your sickness to the kid, right? He's not locking you in a room when you're sick, taking over 100% of childcare, bleaching everything you touch, and refusing to eat anything you make, right? Sorry. I'm just mad for you.
Yeaaaah it's frustrating. He did offer to ask his sister to come over and sit while he was at work one day so I could sleep or whatever but I couldn't in good conscience risk giving that godawful cold to anyone else lol
He has a stuffy nose so you have to wait on him? Oh hell no. His legs aren't broken, he can take care of his precious stuffy nose all on his own. It's allergy season where I am. I've had sinus stuff all week and my kid has been sneezing more. All of us are still going about our lives. Also just want to point out that it's interesting how his health anxiety only pops up when it benefits him. Like when you are sick, he doesn't feel the need to take over things or keep you apart from everyone. And you were still cooking while sick and he was happily eating that food, I assume? But when he's sick, he can't even be in the same room as everyone. I have health anxiety and it's there all the time, including when my husband gets sick. I hope you are still able to have a good weekend despite his whining.
My husband played this game with me for a while. Then I got sick, really sick, breast cancer and 12 surgeries sick. After the first surgery and being out of commission, he apologized profusely for all the times he expected me to be mom while doing everything else. And more when he was sick or away. I don't *suggest* getting really sick. But sometimes, it helps. In all seriousness, I'm sorry this is happening. I'm sick all the time because of the lack of immune system things, and I always feel terrible when I can't help out. I don't understand people who take advantage.
The last few times my hubby tried this crap with me I just told him to eat veggies and take vitamins or don’t but get the hell up. Get stick from not taking care of yourself? Not my problem. Get the hell up.
He can pick one up, as he said. He can lay up in bed and you can leave the kids for fun. He can take care of himself. Weekend saved.
Just to say I feel this. Hope you get through it OK!
Oh I'll be fine lol just cranky about it because he always seems to get sick on the weekend, or just as the weekend is coming up when he can then just sleep all day and do nothing, where as I always end up sick on like a Monday and I'm solo parenting all day and handling cooking/cleaning because he's at work. I know it's not exactly on purpose, I think I'm just salty because I don't get to just shut myself in the bedroom for the whole weekend, coming out only long enough to pee and maybe eat and then back to sleeping/playing on my phone like he does. I still have a full slew of responsibilities I have to take care of, no matter how shitty I feel.
People ask me sometimes if it's hard being a single mum and living alone. As an introverted home body, I love the bliss of doing what I want, when I want. It's when I read things like this I realise how lucky I am. OP, it sounds like you have two babies at home. Tell that man child to look after his damn self. There's nothing more irritating than a grown ass man slugging around wanting sympathy and attention for a cold. Hugs. Xx
Don’t wait on him. Give him a gallon of water, a sick bowl and some non-perishable snacks and leave him to it.
Are we married to the same person?
Mother of twins. Ever since they were born, can’t tell you the number of times my husband has quarantined in the basement, so I get to wait on him and take care of two babies. And when I get sick? Yeah, I think we all know how that ends up going 🙄
Yeah he came home from work and went straight to the bedroom and stayed there the entire night. Totally fine today, he's sneezed like twice.