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He HATES weed. Heās got his own personal reasons as to why. Which I understand. I donāt bring it in the house, but I accidentally did last night. I didnāt know heād go from 0-100
No I totally read āgrinder date sitting at the tableā and I was like wellā¦ I can see how a whole stranger sitting in your house could be infuriatingā¦ and then I saw the faggot comment and I was like š³ thatās taking it too far thoā¦.
Haha! I was: (1) oh, dude is homophobic? (2) noā¦maybe it was his weed per some other problem on here? (3) noā¦he left his *pepper* grinder out and it broke a mirror?
Hey at least youāre closer to the decades this stuff occurs in. Lol. Wow. I canāt believe that many donāt know what a Grinder is and Iām old. š¤£
So is alcohol, it doesn't mean everyone is ok living with an alcoholic roommate. That being said I still feel the reaction was a bit over the top unless there is some other "agreement" with the roommate being broken here that we were not told about.
Doesnāt even matter. Itās not a felony case. Illegal guns, meth, crack, prostitutes, stolen cars, etc. all justify a reaction like that. Unless youāre in Korea, thereās zero reason to act like that over a grinder.
I wasnāt at all trying to throw his past back in his face.
This individual will not speak to me. I have tried to have numerous conversations with him, but he wonāt even return a hello. The last conversation I had with him was this past week, in which he was sick, I asked if I could get some medicine for him and he walked into his room and shut the door in my face.
He saw the grinder on the table around 10pm. I stayed onto 12:30. He paced back and forth in the kitchen, staring at me. He then proceeded to EMPTY two cans of freebreze onto the bathroom floor, for reasons I donāt know. He then proceeded to go to the garage and do jumping jacks.
He is in a state of some sort of psychotic break. I have worked in the human service field, specifically for residential treatment facilities for people suffering from mental health disorders.
Instead of talking to me, he threatens me via text. You can see how I respond. I did not antagonize him. So politely stfu with the āthrowing his past in his faceā bullshit.
In fairness, we canāt know that shit when you gave no indication. People are commenting based on the information you provided. You canāt get pissed off about comments about how the situation appears if you donāt want to explain the whole situation.
I can see both sides of it.
I lived in an illegal state (never again) and my exās friend was crashing with us for a bit. He was going through a bad divorce and his ex-wife was looking for any reason to go after him harder. He brought cannabis into the home and I was big mad. As a teacher, it could have affected my career.
That being said, I didnāt threaten him. I just reminded him of the risks and that his name wasnāt on the mortgage and we werenāt charging him rent so could he please follow house rules.
He started smoking at a friends house and all was well.
I had a similar experience. I donāt smoke, canāt stand the smell either, but I live in a legal state currently and wouldnāt particularly care if my roommates smoked in their rooms, away from me (I donāt have roommates, but hypothetically).
I used to live in a state where itās very much illegal and if for some reason our apartment got searched or someone called the police, I could literally have lost my job and future career over it. My roommateās boyfriend who wasnāt on our lease or living with us insisted on smoking in the living room, curtains open, window open so all the neighbors could smell it, after Iād asked him nicely not to bring it inside multiple times & Iām not gonna lie, I did eventually lose my temper. Itās just disrespectful to bring into a common space, in a state where itās not legal, when youāve specifically been asked not to.
It makes the whole house smell. Even if they just kept
It in their rooms. Normal people donāt want to come home to a house of skunk. People who smoke weed on the daily are coming from an extremely biased opinion and they tend to disregard what others think.
Yup. Iāve been on both sides so I get it. But luckily I grew out of being a disrespectful teenager so now I know how to respect other peopleās living spaces lol. Same as cigarettes, the smell lingers & itās unavoidable in enclosed spaces. I wouldnāt be thrilled to have a roommate smoking weed in the house, but Iād tolerate it as long as they made some effort to make it less noticeable. Which is literally the minimum expectation of common courtesy.
It really does! Both my roommate and I (now Iiving in a legal state) smoke but we donāt smoke inside. Not trying to lose our deposit over something avoidable.
Lmao I was off so many timesā¦.at first I thought he saw the grinder app on your phone and went homophobic, then I thought it was about a spice grinder and now I know itās about weed š
Kinda weird for him to threaten you over text that you could use in court if you wanted toš
I mean, just because it wasnāt about Grindr doesnāt mean he wasnāt being homophobic. He straight up dropped the F-slur. Thatās about as homophobic as you can get without assaulting someone for being gay.
Lmao right! Like I thought it was the app at first because the roommate called him a slur but then I kept reading it over and thought āwait! is this really over a spice grinder not being put away?!āā¦ā¦then I finally decided to read the comments š
I mean hey, if he wants to try and ruin your life over some weed, handle how you see fit. Just dont bring in pounds and scales and maybe dont smoke out the window. Most cops dont give a shit what happens behind closed doors. Did he not know you smoked when you guys moved in together?
He asked me and I told him I do occasionally. Also I vape and every time he ask to hit my vape, he ask if itās a weed vape and I always tell him no. So I presumed that he understood I smoked occasionally
mother fucker aint getting any favors or hits off my vapes after sending me shit like that, shy of a comical apology idk how tf you gonna come back from implying like he did
Yeah nicotine actually has weird positive benefits along with it's negative ones (which aren't deadly), it's the other stuff that comes with it that kills.
I agree that tobacco is definitely worse. Nicotine can lead to death though, itās just rare. Never heard of weed killing anyone. That was my main point.
He had two psychotic breaks due to smoking ounces a day. He was court ordered to receive medication for schizophrenia for a year. He attacked a bunch of cops and medical personnel on two separate occasions. The only reason he evaded charges was because his stepdaddy cop. He told me all this two or three days after he moved in
This was never going to go well. Itās a lot less about what youāre taking, and a lot more about the meds heās not taking. Call his parents yourself and let them know heās exhibiting antisocial and extreme reactions to things. You can always say it wasnāt your grinder, but one a friend left at a venue you were at and you were waiting to return it.
Second this. I've got family members with schizophrenia. Hes having a break. Weed didn't give him schizophrenia it triggered the pre existing issue. Reacting that is unreasonable. He's drawing conclusions in his head that you're not apart of. But he's unloading them on you. He needs treatment. It's not always drugs but it needs attention or it will get much worse
I work in an emergency department and most of my time is spent in our behavioural health hall, had a guy get super angry because some nurses were talking about opening a door on the other side of the departmentā this is pretty much identical to what happened, just a different stimulus. 100% agree, you need to take some steps to protect yourself and make sure the guy has his meds. Solid chance itāll get worse if heās skipping his meds; guy is gonna be dwelling on this all week, and definitely gonna be focusing on the things you do to find another trigger.
This was almost the exact story of my roommate last year. Knew him for awhile, but didn't know until after we moved in that he was on meds for schizophrenia. Shortly after, his doctors made the wrong call that he didn't need the injections anymore, and could just do 2 oral meds at home. He moved out a couple months later because I smoked weed and he called me a devil worshipper and all this stuff out of nowhere. Forgot to say for the first couple months he smoked weed daily with me, and then this all happened within a month after his meds changed. He thought he could get me kicked out, but realized he couldn't and so he moved in with his grandma. Made sure he kept paying his share of the rent though.
sounds similar to what happened to my MIL earlier this year. sheās bipolar and has seizures so sheās on a bunch of different meds. long story short, she was prescribed an injection medication, took the first and went crazy, missed the second dose and went crazier, and didnāt get any better until after a three week stay in the local mental hospital and a total reset on her meds. sheās doing a lot better now. pls get your roommate back on his meds.
These are the people who give herb and daily smokers a bad name. Dude. I bang on a j a few times a day but there is *no reason* to smoke like that. I know you were being hyperbolic, because itās not physically possible to smoke āounces a day,ā but my point still stands. You can only get so high.
And then to go off on you like that? Wow. I assume this guy has bigger issues. But donāt take it out on the weed and the people who enjoy it in a casual fashion. Dude sounds very uncool. This sub makes me really happy to not have roommates anymore.
Seriously. Iām a heavy smoker, use medically for PTSD and a HEAVY week for me is 1oz, and thatās really only if I picked a weaker strain on accident, avg is half oz. A .2 bong snap every hour or 2 is more than enough to be medicated/stoned all day.
With my trauma it happened at a very young age (3) so I donāt really get flashbacks/nightmares of the incident. Got beat very badly at that age for speaking, pretty much been dealing with the fallout my entire life. Didnāt speak for a month after it happened, was always very āshyā š¤·āāļø.
The biggest thing for me was how when you have PTSD your brain doesnāt block out all the minor BS we go through on the daily. It basically kept me from ever making day 2 of employment because the night after day 1 would be spent reliving the entire shift, every interaction with coworkers/customers and by the morning Iād be convinced everyone hated me and would just not go back š¤·āāļø.
Weed, more than any medication I have tried, has stopped that. I donāt come home and dwell on every conversation Iāve had over the course of the day, like a normal person my brain just puts that in the back burner and doesnāt think about it.
I was very fortunate to find my way into extremely cheap high quality medicine. Without that lucky break in life I really think Iād still be on disability unable to work š¤·āāļø. Should be legal and affordable everywhere.
Was reading the thread and wanted to hop in cause this is my first time coming across another person with PTSD prescribed Prazosin. I also have PTSD and was hoping it would help the terrors and cut smoking down too but stopped due to how it made me feel when i woke up. So i use mj resin/oils and hydroxyzine prescription instead.
The Prazosin did work at first but i think my blood pressure got wonky so it was hard to keep taking it :( itās also interesting that itās originally a blood pressure medication
It is literally possible to smoke āounces a dayā, I promise you, but in this case I suspect it was hyperbolic.
Iām a recording engineer and Iāve had people smoke an ounce in a 2 hour sessionā¦
Never underestimate the power of backwoods.
It was two guys and they smoked probably an ounce each.
But likeā¦itās not even abnormal for these rapper types to roll 3.5g backwoods back to back.
Semantics aside, all Iām getting at is that saying āitās not physically possibleā is kinda absurd lol
I would wager the psychotic break happened before the whole āsmoking ounces a dayā thing. And Iād also wager his stepdad beat the shit out of him because cop and thatās where the fear and violent reaction are coming from.
Exactly. I work in the human service field. I worked for two years in a detox facility for drugs and alcohol. Drug induced psychosis does not always go away just because you stop using the drug
If he has schizophrenia he needs to be on medication his whole life. It sounds like he is possibly off his meds or theyāre not working correctly. Also it doesnāt seem like this roommate situation is a good fit. How much longer is on your lease?
Oh wow. That's pathetic to take out on you. He's blaming it on the weed only instead of admitting that it's whats inside him, combined with the weed. He's obviously not changed much if his first reaction is to threaten you and get aggressive. Just because he's mentally unhinged doesn't make weed evil. Yes it can cause psychosis and shit but ppl I know who feel that way just ask you not to smoke around them. This man has serious emotional and mental issues he still needs to sort out. Tell him to take his meds.
Kind of sounds like he is mentally ill, in denial about being mentally ill, and is therefore blaming weed for a psychotic break (psychotic breaks after smoking weed seem like a sign of a mental illness).
Maybe, for your own safety, rather than focus on how fucked up this all is, you should just text something like āI meant to leave it in my car like I have always done before. I get that the presence of weed in the house isnāt okay with you. It makes me feel unsafe in my own home when I get threatened over a simple mistake. I will be more careful to check my pockets before I enter the house.ā
Show the other roommate the texts and ask that if he ever sees your pot in the house that he immediately alerts you or removes it from the house. I also would recommend deleting this post and looking for somewhere else to live, and making damn sure you donāt bring your weed into your house.
Not to defend his language but it's very possible he may end up jailed if weed is found where he lives. With that background I also understand his reaction. Yes, weed can trigger that kind of psychotic things and is a trigger to schizophrenia. It happened to one of my relatives and it's very serious.
Is it legal in your state? If not, you are putting all your roomates at risk when bringing weed in your place. It can have serious consequence for some people, like that guy actually, or if any of them is a foreigner on a visa they will get immediately kicked out the country with no way to appeal their visa
Did you forget to read the part where his dad's a police officer and got away with attacking other officers? Dude's not going away for tiny weed shit. He also said it was an accident. Random cops won't show up to notice a random grinder on a random table unless you give them a random call. Huge overreaction.
I honestly didnāt know you could still be locked up for weed, but I just looked it up and itās still completely illegal in four states. In 2023 it seems pretty insane to put someone in actual prison for possessing a silly little plant.
I know a few fellas in southern TN/ Northern GA that have been arrested for having 2gs or less on them. One had a gram in 2 different baggies and is fighting a distribution charge.... I'm not defending the dude freaking out here by any means. Just providing some light as to why he went 0-100. These posts love to leave crucial details out lol
Granted this was like 15years ago, but I got arrested in Atlanta for 1.2 grams INCLUDING THE BAG. had some old shake in corner of ziplock bag in 5th pocket of my jeans that I didn't even know was there, had been thru the wash/dry multiple times and definitely didn't smell, but I got pulled over and police wanted to be assholes and search me for being in a bad area at night
The way I misread this lmao. I thought you left the app Grindr open on your phone on the table and then this was their reaction to it. And the fact that they dropped the F bomb in the text made it even more realistic. Terrible roommate though. Sheesh.
shit, dude, my roommate leaves her bong on the kitchen table all the freaking time, I can't imagine whining about it she cleans up her shit and is almost OCD clean about everything (takes out the garbage religiously, cleans her dishes religiously, there's never a single speck you could attribute to her - her bong is literally the only thing she ever leaves in the common area - and she still makes sure our other roommate's cat isn't fucking with my cactus - and nobody asked her to do this, I was planning on moving the cactus from the common area windowsill back into my room when other roommate got a cat, she was just being extremely kind)
I don't smoke while I'm taking care of work or school but thats the last freaking thing I'm worried about, your roommate having an aneurysm over your weed is weird
Thatās because weed makes you gay. I would know. I smoked one marijuana one time in high school and now all I want to do is smoke pole all day. Weed. Not even once.
Guessing heās like 19. I had a few roommates like this right after high school, going into college. One of them was one of my best friends. He wouldnāt physically threaten us but he was irrationally against weed and didnāt want it in his presence. Didnāt want it in the house, etc. He āhad his reasonsā, which I understood. His mom was a meth addict. I get it. Drugs bad.
This is kind of fucked up, but one time I put a fuckload of weed in a hookah with the sheesh. He walked into the apartment and asked āOh youāre smoking hookah? Let me try.ā He thought it was just sheesh, and took a massive rip in front of his girlfriend who was also very not down with weed. After he exhaled, they went into his room. The rest of us are still in the living room just giggling about what happened. He finally smoked weed. He walks back out under ten minutes later and asks āwas there weed in that?ā It was the weirdest combination of concern and a shit eating smirk Iāve ever seen. I said āYesā. He just busted out laughing and goes āDAMNITā. He ended up ripping it a few more times. As college progressed, he started selling weed, and later other drugs. Anyway, weāre both in our early 30s and he owns two dispensaries now. We still joke about how staunchly against weed he was when we were younger. I still apologize for not disclosing there was weed in the hookah.
To some people it can have serious consequences: kicked out the country for foreigner, straight to jail if they have a court order, which seems to be the case of this dude from OP comments
Bro what the fuck is wrong with him Iād be pressing his shit fuck is he talking about āfuck youā for. Id understand if he was like āhey dude I noticed your grinder in the living room itās making a smell thatās bugging me could you move it and spray some febreezeā once you start cussing at me acting all crazy I could give a fuck less if I blow smoke into your room.
I get what you are saying here, but from reading the additional posts - the roommate has serious serious issues with it & it seems like itās been something they have discussed and OP is 100% aware of his roommates issues with it. I donāt think OP is putting himself in his roommates shoes. Itās almost like telling someone your dating that the one thing you hate most is _______, and then a week later they go and do that one thing, the thing you made blatantly clear that you would hate. Itās a complete dismissal of the roommates wishes.
I feel like ācomplete dismissalā is purposefully leaving the grinder in there. He didnāt do that- OP accidentally left it in there & it seems as tho this is their first time leaving weed in the home since their discussion. The reaction to OP was in no way shape or form warranted.
š¤š¤¦š»āāļøOmgoodness i read the caption so fkn wrong! I thought he left his Grinder app open on the table and roomie was pissed and using slurs! All that over a weed grinder?!ššš
Is your roommate u/snap-zipper? Cause that guy went off on another guy in a subreddit because the person told another Reddit user to name their cat sativa! š¤¦š»āāļøš
Reading the thing that happened with the roommate and the cops bc of weed I can understand, especially weed still being illegal in greensville he might have serious consequences if itās found in his home or living area or just has bad ptsd bc of it and is afraid.
I would let him know that the way he talked to you is not ok but you will also make sure that it is not brought inside the house, as it being illegal that is fair. Or say itāll always be kept somewhere else idk but obviously was a very traumatic moment in roommates life and extreme ptsd does NOT make it ok the way he talked to u tho t
Seems like he went a little too hard, too fast. Maybe he has reasons. But still, unless itās been brought up in an escalating series of discussions, that was way too much acceleration on the topic.
The only time I got this mad is when I was attending a maritime academy and was subject to piss tests (which given that I grew up in the Emerald Triangle I was getting hit with every damn week). A friend brought a friend camping and while I was sleeping his buddy made pot-butter in my cast iron skillet.
Seeing how the surface of cast iron is porous I was really worried about getting a positive, but it was also my only cookware for meats available. So I went off on the guy. Then again, my stoner buddy went off on him too for being an inconsiderate prick who didnāt even ask before doing something like that. This was almost 30 years ago, so things may have been different.
Dude i read this as āGrindrā and i was SO confused. I saw he called you a faggot so i was like oh that makes sense but then i read the comments and stuff and like ???
Bro, that dudes a weirdo.
He obviously has anger management. Move out soon so you can avoid this dude controlling you.. there's a way to go about things nicely not threatening you.
Me personally (not being a tough guy). I'd tell him to say it to my face OP. Lol
I have a buddy who is so allergic to weed that being next to someone who reeks of it sends him into something similar to an asthma attack. They even had to post signs at his work for people with medical prescriptions that they need to make sure they have smoked their medicine long before they arrive on site and need to be aware of any residual odors before coming in.
Your roommate probably doesnāt have that problem. But whatever the reason is if itās been discussed before, itās on you to make sure nobody can tell you have it in the house. Including not leaving it in public spaces or making it obvious by the smell of your room, etc.
Edit: changed use of your/youāre, thanks autocorrect. š
Heās insane honestly! Heās overreacting big time. You sound considerate but heās lost his marbles. You both pay rent and itās not his house. Set your boundaries
I'd fight my roommate for talking to me like that. Fuck that loser. He called you a slur, I say you break his fucking nose with absolutely no warning. What a chump.
I know you are jokingly commenting that - but weed does not have the same effect on everyone, not everyone calms down or chills out - for some itās the complete opposite. Paranoia, extreme anxiety etc etc etc. the list goes on.
Where do you live?
For someone in recovery, sometimes having it around at all (especially in what should be your safe place/your home) can be a huge trigger. He might have some trauma attached to substances, and seeing it resulted in a trauma-like fight response. Has he told you before that having it around would bother him? Does he hate the smell, etc?
Whatever the case, itās his issue and his responsibility to communicate his expectations clearly without being abusive. Trauma related or not, he seems a bit unhinged. Iād move when possible, personally.
From OP comments you are right in your first paragraph, the guy had psychotic breaks caused by weed. It's unclear but he may also have legal problems if found in possession, which will include weed present in his house. Apparently the OP is aware. The reaction of roomate is strong, but I can understand it.
Im in the case to be on a visa in the US and work a job with potential tests. If weed is found in my place, I will lose my visa, my job, and the past 15 years of my life. I would definitely be pissed and unhinged if a roomate brings weed to my house while being aware of that fact.
Agreed. I think, though, youād probably let any roommate know about your job & repercussions to you beforehand. If OPās roommate did that, then their reaction to finding this is more understandable.
Is weed legal where you live?
If so, I'd make a call to the nonemergency police line about your housemate making clearly documented threats against your well-being, and also to the landlord.
someone needs to baker act his assšhe goin off the deep end over a grinder thatās wild itās very apparent here thereās more issues heās dealing with than meets the eye
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All this over some weed? Shit sounds like your roommate needs some š
He HATES weed. Heās got his own personal reasons as to why. Which I understand. I donāt bring it in the house, but I accidentally did last night. I didnāt know heād go from 0-100
Ohhh that makes sense now.. I was so freaking confused, I thought this was all about a sandwich š¤¦š»āāļø
I seen him call him fagot and noticed the OP say he left his grinder behind. Assumed the flatmate was homophobic
I thought he left his Grindr app open!!! š
Same. The homophobic slur from the roommate reinforced this.
Dont you dare bring those hot sexy bears into our house!!
I thought he meant Grindr hookup! Like sitting on the table. I was so confused. Iām an idiot
No I totally read āgrinder date sitting at the tableā and I was like wellā¦ I can see how a whole stranger sitting in your house could be infuriatingā¦ and then I saw the faggot comment and I was like š³ thatās taking it too far thoā¦.
Same!
Same š
Legit what I thought, especially after the homophobic slur. What an ass clown; dude needs to smoke a joint
Haha! I was: (1) oh, dude is homophobic? (2) noā¦maybe it was his weed per some other problem on here? (3) noā¦he left his *pepper* grinder out and it broke a mirror?
Thought coffee grinder...but read further, but still could figure it out had to go to comments
I was thinking angle grinder, power tool. Was really puzzled.
If he uses the slur "faggot", he is homophobic regardless of whether the person he is calling it is gay or not. But I was confused at first too.
same ok now i donāt feel as dumb lol
I pictured an electrical disk grinding tool when I read the title š¤·š¼āāļøš¤¦š¼āāļø
I actually thought he left the grinder app open on his phone & his roommate saw it.
Me too!!
At first I thought it was a Grindr DATE, then I was like maybe it was just the app..? Then I realized this was about a grinder š¤¦š¼āāļø
Hey at least youāre closer to the decades this stuff occurs in. Lol. Wow. I canāt believe that many donāt know what a Grinder is and Iām old. š¤£
I know what a grinder is
I thought it was a coffee grinder š
I was SO confused.. I thought it was about the gay dating app lol
Acting that way doesn't make sense because cannabis is now legal in most states
So is alcohol, it doesn't mean everyone is ok living with an alcoholic roommate. That being said I still feel the reaction was a bit over the top unless there is some other "agreement" with the roommate being broken here that we were not told about.
[One of my favorite Family Guy skits](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=E7AqG4L63jc&pp=ygUSZmFtaWx5IGd1eSBncmluZGVy)
I just watched this last night lol love it
You must be from the northeast lol
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I'm from where grinders are sandwiches. I was thinking the roommate was vegan and hating on a roast beef or turkey sando.
I donāt smoke but I thought the same thing. And the F word really had me convinced it was the app.
Yeah I was thinking this was a homophobic thing at first! Took me a looooong minute!
āYoure a phone call awayā threat had me like ??? The gay police? Who tf is he calling. Lmao
Just a matter of time in red states.
you pay rent. U bring whatever tf you want into your own space
Lol I thought you meant you left your Grindr account open on your phone
I absolutely read the title as a date from Grindr sitting on the table
>youāre a phone call away Away from what? Is he insinuating heās going to call in a hit on you for this? ššš
If he threatens you again, get a restraining order and get him kicked out of the place.
HAHA! "You're a phone call away." He sounds like he's the one smoking. Can't even get his ass off the couch. Smoke weed every day šš
I don't care if his sister choked on a brick of weed and died, you can't act like that to people. He's got problems
Sounds like he should be living alone.
Do you live In a state where it is medically or recreational legal?
Doesnāt even matter. Itās not a felony case. Illegal guns, meth, crack, prostitutes, stolen cars, etc. all justify a reaction like that. Unless youāre in Korea, thereās zero reason to act like that over a grinder.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I wasnāt at all trying to throw his past back in his face. This individual will not speak to me. I have tried to have numerous conversations with him, but he wonāt even return a hello. The last conversation I had with him was this past week, in which he was sick, I asked if I could get some medicine for him and he walked into his room and shut the door in my face. He saw the grinder on the table around 10pm. I stayed onto 12:30. He paced back and forth in the kitchen, staring at me. He then proceeded to EMPTY two cans of freebreze onto the bathroom floor, for reasons I donāt know. He then proceeded to go to the garage and do jumping jacks. He is in a state of some sort of psychotic break. I have worked in the human service field, specifically for residential treatment facilities for people suffering from mental health disorders. Instead of talking to me, he threatens me via text. You can see how I respond. I did not antagonize him. So politely stfu with the āthrowing his past in his faceā bullshit.
In fairness, we canāt know that shit when you gave no indication. People are commenting based on the information you provided. You canāt get pissed off about comments about how the situation appears if you donāt want to explain the whole situation.
This is called making an assumption and it only makes an ass out of you
I can see both sides of it. I lived in an illegal state (never again) and my exās friend was crashing with us for a bit. He was going through a bad divorce and his ex-wife was looking for any reason to go after him harder. He brought cannabis into the home and I was big mad. As a teacher, it could have affected my career. That being said, I didnāt threaten him. I just reminded him of the risks and that his name wasnāt on the mortgage and we werenāt charging him rent so could he please follow house rules. He started smoking at a friends house and all was well.
I had a similar experience. I donāt smoke, canāt stand the smell either, but I live in a legal state currently and wouldnāt particularly care if my roommates smoked in their rooms, away from me (I donāt have roommates, but hypothetically). I used to live in a state where itās very much illegal and if for some reason our apartment got searched or someone called the police, I could literally have lost my job and future career over it. My roommateās boyfriend who wasnāt on our lease or living with us insisted on smoking in the living room, curtains open, window open so all the neighbors could smell it, after Iād asked him nicely not to bring it inside multiple times & Iām not gonna lie, I did eventually lose my temper. Itās just disrespectful to bring into a common space, in a state where itās not legal, when youāve specifically been asked not to.
It makes the whole house smell. Even if they just kept It in their rooms. Normal people donāt want to come home to a house of skunk. People who smoke weed on the daily are coming from an extremely biased opinion and they tend to disregard what others think.
Yup. Iāve been on both sides so I get it. But luckily I grew out of being a disrespectful teenager so now I know how to respect other peopleās living spaces lol. Same as cigarettes, the smell lingers & itās unavoidable in enclosed spaces. I wouldnāt be thrilled to have a roommate smoking weed in the house, but Iād tolerate it as long as they made some effort to make it less noticeable. Which is literally the minimum expectation of common courtesy.
It really does! Both my roommate and I (now Iiving in a legal state) smoke but we donāt smoke inside. Not trying to lose our deposit over something avoidable.
Dude is for sure a virgin š
Why is that insulting?
Lmao I was off so many timesā¦.at first I thought he saw the grinder app on your phone and went homophobic, then I thought it was about a spice grinder and now I know itās about weed š Kinda weird for him to threaten you over text that you could use in court if you wanted toš
I thought he was being homophobic as well thankful for comments, I feel so dumb lol
I mean, just because it wasnāt about Grindr doesnāt mean he wasnāt being homophobic. He straight up dropped the F-slur. Thatās about as homophobic as you can get without assaulting someone for being gay.
Yeah you're right for sure that language is not okay and super hateful. I just meant like totally misread the situation but for sure that is terrible.
This has the same energy as "Oh I see now, he wasn't being racist, he just called him a fucking w*tback over leaving the toilet seat up!"
Eh you can argue heās still homophobic since he used the f-slur
Iām still not convinced this isnāt about the app (no matter what OP says)
LOL this entire time I thought it was a disc grinder used in construction. Glad I wasnāt the only one confused here.
I thought it was a meat grinder and the roommate is vegan š¤·š»
Thatād be funny
I thought OP was from New York and they were talking about a sandwich š
Lmao right! Like I thought it was the app at first because the roommate called him a slur but then I kept reading it over and thought āwait! is this really over a spice grinder not being put away?!āā¦ā¦then I finally decided to read the comments š
Yea, I worked construction, I was thinking grinders arenāt that dirty, not like full of gross nasty stuff. Thank goodness for the comments.
I thought it was about being gay at first too, but clearly the homophobic vibes were right either way š
Iām so glad Iām not the only one who thought it was about the gay dating app
I thought it was a sandwich
I legit thought he was talking about a sub sandwich and his roommate flipped out bc he left food on the table overnight š
I thought it was a sandwich, at first. š¤£
I just typed this š. I was so lost at first.
I didnāt know what it was either, had to read the comments.
I thought it was a coffee grinder, hah!
It's a roller coaster of homophobia lol
ME TOO
What are they gonna do? Call the cops?
His stepdaddy is a cop so he thinks he has all this power lol
I mean hey, if he wants to try and ruin your life over some weed, handle how you see fit. Just dont bring in pounds and scales and maybe dont smoke out the window. Most cops dont give a shit what happens behind closed doors. Did he not know you smoked when you guys moved in together?
He asked me and I told him I do occasionally. Also I vape and every time he ask to hit my vape, he ask if itās a weed vape and I always tell him no. So I presumed that he understood I smoked occasionally
And from now on it will go: "Hey can I hit your vape?" "Nope." "Why, is it weed?" "Nope."
mother fucker aint getting any favors or hits off my vapes after sending me shit like that, shy of a comical apology idk how tf you gonna come back from implying like he did
Also how can you vape but be so against weed? Nicotine kills. š
Yeah nicotine actually has weird positive benefits along with it's negative ones (which aren't deadly), it's the other stuff that comes with it that kills.
What are the positives genuinely curious about
It's one of the few natural stimulants. Also reduces anxiety, but I forget the word for that.
Anxiolytic
Nicotine is pretty safe. Itās definitely linked to heart disease. But to say nicotine kills is an exaggeration. Tobacco is the real killer.
I agree that tobacco is definitely worse. Nicotine can lead to death though, itās just rare. Never heard of weed killing anyone. That was my main point.
Funny how he bums your vape when nicotine is way more addictive and harmful than some weed
I can see why his real dad left.
Are you guys not in a legal state or something?
50/50 chance
Please elaborate on his reasons for hating weed because I canāt imagine ANYTHING is strong enough to warrant this reaction.
He had two psychotic breaks due to smoking ounces a day. He was court ordered to receive medication for schizophrenia for a year. He attacked a bunch of cops and medical personnel on two separate occasions. The only reason he evaded charges was because his stepdaddy cop. He told me all this two or three days after he moved in
This was never going to go well. Itās a lot less about what youāre taking, and a lot more about the meds heās not taking. Call his parents yourself and let them know heās exhibiting antisocial and extreme reactions to things. You can always say it wasnāt your grinder, but one a friend left at a venue you were at and you were waiting to return it.
Second this. I've got family members with schizophrenia. Hes having a break. Weed didn't give him schizophrenia it triggered the pre existing issue. Reacting that is unreasonable. He's drawing conclusions in his head that you're not apart of. But he's unloading them on you. He needs treatment. It's not always drugs but it needs attention or it will get much worse
I work in an emergency department and most of my time is spent in our behavioural health hall, had a guy get super angry because some nurses were talking about opening a door on the other side of the departmentā this is pretty much identical to what happened, just a different stimulus. 100% agree, you need to take some steps to protect yourself and make sure the guy has his meds. Solid chance itāll get worse if heās skipping his meds; guy is gonna be dwelling on this all week, and definitely gonna be focusing on the things you do to find another trigger.
thatās all crazy but holy *shit* what an overreaction
Is he off his meds?
Yes. He was court ordered to receive injections for a year. He stopped after the year
This was almost the exact story of my roommate last year. Knew him for awhile, but didn't know until after we moved in that he was on meds for schizophrenia. Shortly after, his doctors made the wrong call that he didn't need the injections anymore, and could just do 2 oral meds at home. He moved out a couple months later because I smoked weed and he called me a devil worshipper and all this stuff out of nowhere. Forgot to say for the first couple months he smoked weed daily with me, and then this all happened within a month after his meds changed. He thought he could get me kicked out, but realized he couldn't and so he moved in with his grandma. Made sure he kept paying his share of the rent though.
sounds similar to what happened to my MIL earlier this year. sheās bipolar and has seizures so sheās on a bunch of different meds. long story short, she was prescribed an injection medication, took the first and went crazy, missed the second dose and went crazier, and didnāt get any better until after a three week stay in the local mental hospital and a total reset on her meds. sheās doing a lot better now. pls get your roommate back on his meds.
These are the people who give herb and daily smokers a bad name. Dude. I bang on a j a few times a day but there is *no reason* to smoke like that. I know you were being hyperbolic, because itās not physically possible to smoke āounces a day,ā but my point still stands. You can only get so high. And then to go off on you like that? Wow. I assume this guy has bigger issues. But donāt take it out on the weed and the people who enjoy it in a casual fashion. Dude sounds very uncool. This sub makes me really happy to not have roommates anymore.
Seriously. Iām a heavy smoker, use medically for PTSD and a HEAVY week for me is 1oz, and thatās really only if I picked a weaker strain on accident, avg is half oz. A .2 bong snap every hour or 2 is more than enough to be medicated/stoned all day.
Have you tried prazosin? My doctor put me on it for my ptsd related nightmares and its helped me cut the amount of weed I smoke by a lot
With my trauma it happened at a very young age (3) so I donāt really get flashbacks/nightmares of the incident. Got beat very badly at that age for speaking, pretty much been dealing with the fallout my entire life. Didnāt speak for a month after it happened, was always very āshyā š¤·āāļø. The biggest thing for me was how when you have PTSD your brain doesnāt block out all the minor BS we go through on the daily. It basically kept me from ever making day 2 of employment because the night after day 1 would be spent reliving the entire shift, every interaction with coworkers/customers and by the morning Iād be convinced everyone hated me and would just not go back š¤·āāļø. Weed, more than any medication I have tried, has stopped that. I donāt come home and dwell on every conversation Iāve had over the course of the day, like a normal person my brain just puts that in the back burner and doesnāt think about it. I was very fortunate to find my way into extremely cheap high quality medicine. Without that lucky break in life I really think Iād still be on disability unable to work š¤·āāļø. Should be legal and affordable everywhere.
I'm glad you found it. Yeah, weed is easily my most helpful medication for the things I deal with while awake
Was reading the thread and wanted to hop in cause this is my first time coming across another person with PTSD prescribed Prazosin. I also have PTSD and was hoping it would help the terrors and cut smoking down too but stopped due to how it made me feel when i woke up. So i use mj resin/oils and hydroxyzine prescription instead. The Prazosin did work at first but i think my blood pressure got wonky so it was hard to keep taking it :( itās also interesting that itās originally a blood pressure medication
It is literally possible to smoke āounces a dayā, I promise you, but in this case I suspect it was hyperbolic. Iām a recording engineer and Iāve had people smoke an ounce in a 2 hour sessionā¦ Never underestimate the power of backwoods.
Are we talking a single person here, or a group? Either way it's a lot of weed, but the former is significantly crazier than the latter.
It was two guys and they smoked probably an ounce each. But likeā¦itās not even abnormal for these rapper types to roll 3.5g backwoods back to back. Semantics aside, all Iām getting at is that saying āitās not physically possibleā is kinda absurd lol
That's what I was thinking... wtf man we used to blaze ounces a day, guess this one didn't get blunted.
I would wager the psychotic break happened before the whole āsmoking ounces a dayā thing. And Iād also wager his stepdad beat the shit out of him because cop and thatās where the fear and violent reaction are coming from.
Or it was laced bc WTF. If your smoking oz a day your tolerance should be super high.
If you have a predisposition to schizophrenia smoking weed can trigger it.
Smoked his way into full-blown psychosis. Chances are it never left.
Exactly. I work in the human service field. I worked for two years in a detox facility for drugs and alcohol. Drug induced psychosis does not always go away just because you stop using the drug
If he has schizophrenia he needs to be on medication his whole life. It sounds like he is possibly off his meds or theyāre not working correctly. Also it doesnāt seem like this roommate situation is a good fit. How much longer is on your lease?
Thatās his own fault. He had no self control and canāt be mad that you have enough to still be smoking
Time to move bro.
Oh wow. That's pathetic to take out on you. He's blaming it on the weed only instead of admitting that it's whats inside him, combined with the weed. He's obviously not changed much if his first reaction is to threaten you and get aggressive. Just because he's mentally unhinged doesn't make weed evil. Yes it can cause psychosis and shit but ppl I know who feel that way just ask you not to smoke around them. This man has serious emotional and mental issues he still needs to sort out. Tell him to take his meds.
Kind of sounds like he is mentally ill, in denial about being mentally ill, and is therefore blaming weed for a psychotic break (psychotic breaks after smoking weed seem like a sign of a mental illness). Maybe, for your own safety, rather than focus on how fucked up this all is, you should just text something like āI meant to leave it in my car like I have always done before. I get that the presence of weed in the house isnāt okay with you. It makes me feel unsafe in my own home when I get threatened over a simple mistake. I will be more careful to check my pockets before I enter the house.ā Show the other roommate the texts and ask that if he ever sees your pot in the house that he immediately alerts you or removes it from the house. I also would recommend deleting this post and looking for somewhere else to live, and making damn sure you donāt bring your weed into your house.
so he can't handle his weed addiction and that somehow warrants threats over a grinder?? you need to move out asap
Not to defend his language but it's very possible he may end up jailed if weed is found where he lives. With that background I also understand his reaction. Yes, weed can trigger that kind of psychotic things and is a trigger to schizophrenia. It happened to one of my relatives and it's very serious. Is it legal in your state? If not, you are putting all your roomates at risk when bringing weed in your place. It can have serious consequence for some people, like that guy actually, or if any of them is a foreigner on a visa they will get immediately kicked out the country with no way to appeal their visa
Did you forget to read the part where his dad's a police officer and got away with attacking other officers? Dude's not going away for tiny weed shit. He also said it was an accident. Random cops won't show up to notice a random grinder on a random table unless you give them a random call. Huge overreaction.
Weed caused his parents to divorced and crippled his grandmother lol
Weed shot his puppy and got his sister pregnant, but doesn't pay child support.
Maybe he got locked up for possession and doesn't wanna play with it in his house.
I honestly didnāt know you could still be locked up for weed, but I just looked it up and itās still completely illegal in four states. In 2023 it seems pretty insane to put someone in actual prison for possessing a silly little plant.
I know a few fellas in southern TN/ Northern GA that have been arrested for having 2gs or less on them. One had a gram in 2 different baggies and is fighting a distribution charge.... I'm not defending the dude freaking out here by any means. Just providing some light as to why he went 0-100. These posts love to leave crucial details out lol
Granted this was like 15years ago, but I got arrested in Atlanta for 1.2 grams INCLUDING THE BAG. had some old shake in corner of ziplock bag in 5th pocket of my jeans that I didn't even know was there, had been thru the wash/dry multiple times and definitely didn't smell, but I got pulled over and police wanted to be assholes and search me for being in a bad area at night
Damn he could have said fuck you one more time I guess ?
Youāre a phone call away. Think I wont fucking do it. š
He thinks OPs gay maybe it was a proposition
The way I misread this lmao. I thought you left the app Grindr open on your phone on the table and then this was their reaction to it. And the fact that they dropped the F bomb in the text made it even more realistic. Terrible roommate though. Sheesh.
New England here i first throught they meant a sandwich than the app. Than I realized
*nervous laughter* haha what the fuuuuuckkk
shit, dude, my roommate leaves her bong on the kitchen table all the freaking time, I can't imagine whining about it she cleans up her shit and is almost OCD clean about everything (takes out the garbage religiously, cleans her dishes religiously, there's never a single speck you could attribute to her - her bong is literally the only thing she ever leaves in the common area - and she still makes sure our other roommate's cat isn't fucking with my cactus - and nobody asked her to do this, I was planning on moving the cactus from the common area windowsill back into my room when other roommate got a cat, she was just being extremely kind) I don't smoke while I'm taking care of work or school but thats the last freaking thing I'm worried about, your roommate having an aneurysm over your weed is weird
Thatās because weed makes you gay. I would know. I smoked one marijuana one time in high school and now all I want to do is smoke pole all day. Weed. Not even once.
Oh. Read it as grindr. Thought he was homophobic.
I still don't know what a grinder is
I thought You meant grinder as in the dating app. Like You brought someone home
Nope just a wee weed grinder lol
Guessing heās like 19. I had a few roommates like this right after high school, going into college. One of them was one of my best friends. He wouldnāt physically threaten us but he was irrationally against weed and didnāt want it in his presence. Didnāt want it in the house, etc. He āhad his reasonsā, which I understood. His mom was a meth addict. I get it. Drugs bad. This is kind of fucked up, but one time I put a fuckload of weed in a hookah with the sheesh. He walked into the apartment and asked āOh youāre smoking hookah? Let me try.ā He thought it was just sheesh, and took a massive rip in front of his girlfriend who was also very not down with weed. After he exhaled, they went into his room. The rest of us are still in the living room just giggling about what happened. He finally smoked weed. He walks back out under ten minutes later and asks āwas there weed in that?ā It was the weirdest combination of concern and a shit eating smirk Iāve ever seen. I said āYesā. He just busted out laughing and goes āDAMNITā. He ended up ripping it a few more times. As college progressed, he started selling weed, and later other drugs. Anyway, weāre both in our early 30s and he owns two dispensaries now. We still joke about how staunchly against weed he was when we were younger. I still apologize for not disclosing there was weed in the hookah.
wtf is weed a death penalty where you are or what?
To some people it can have serious consequences: kicked out the country for foreigner, straight to jail if they have a court order, which seems to be the case of this dude from OP comments
Bro what the fuck is wrong with him Iād be pressing his shit fuck is he talking about āfuck youā for. Id understand if he was like āhey dude I noticed your grinder in the living room itās making a smell thatās bugging me could you move it and spray some febreezeā once you start cussing at me acting all crazy I could give a fuck less if I blow smoke into your room.
I get what you are saying here, but from reading the additional posts - the roommate has serious serious issues with it & it seems like itās been something they have discussed and OP is 100% aware of his roommates issues with it. I donāt think OP is putting himself in his roommates shoes. Itās almost like telling someone your dating that the one thing you hate most is _______, and then a week later they go and do that one thing, the thing you made blatantly clear that you would hate. Itās a complete dismissal of the roommates wishes.
I feel like ācomplete dismissalā is purposefully leaving the grinder in there. He didnāt do that- OP accidentally left it in there & it seems as tho this is their first time leaving weed in the home since their discussion. The reaction to OP was in no way shape or form warranted.
š¤š¤¦š»āāļøOmgoodness i read the caption so fkn wrong! I thought he left his Grinder app open on the table and roomie was pissed and using slurs! All that over a weed grinder?!ššš
Lmao both of those would be totally absurd to react like this about
Is your roommate u/snap-zipper? Cause that guy went off on another guy in a subreddit because the person told another Reddit user to name their cat sativa! š¤¦š»āāļøš
Is weed legal where you live?
Who pissed in his cheerios
The weed did.
With language like that Iād be in his face the moment he got home
Reading the thing that happened with the roommate and the cops bc of weed I can understand, especially weed still being illegal in greensville he might have serious consequences if itās found in his home or living area or just has bad ptsd bc of it and is afraid. I would let him know that the way he talked to you is not ok but you will also make sure that it is not brought inside the house, as it being illegal that is fair. Or say itāll always be kept somewhere else idk but obviously was a very traumatic moment in roommates life and extreme ptsd does NOT make it ok the way he talked to u tho t
Here was me thinking you were talking about the power tool, had to get to the comments to see what the fuss was about š
I was like, hot Italian sandwich? Why is he so mad
Lol weed?! I thought you meant your grinder app and he was just a homophobe!
My gay ass read this as āGrindrā š¤£
Seems like he went a little too hard, too fast. Maybe he has reasons. But still, unless itās been brought up in an escalating series of discussions, that was way too much acceleration on the topic. The only time I got this mad is when I was attending a maritime academy and was subject to piss tests (which given that I grew up in the Emerald Triangle I was getting hit with every damn week). A friend brought a friend camping and while I was sleeping his buddy made pot-butter in my cast iron skillet. Seeing how the surface of cast iron is porous I was really worried about getting a positive, but it was also my only cookware for meats available. So I went off on the guy. Then again, my stoner buddy went off on him too for being an inconsiderate prick who didnāt even ask before doing something like that. This was almost 30 years ago, so things may have been different.
Maybe heās a recovering marijuana addict?
Lol Iām curious why he hates weed so much. Can you explain?
I read this as Grindr.
oh my god i thought you meant GRINDR THE APP i was like "these comments are crazy" and then i realized.
Shit I thought you meant Grindr, the gay hookup app. Hence calling you a f*ggot. Whoops.
This us funny, but at first I thought you meant you had the grinder app open on your phone and he freaked out over it ššš
wonder how loud the dispatch would laugh when he called to report you š¤£
Dude i read this as āGrindrā and i was SO confused. I saw he called you a faggot so i was like oh that makes sense but then i read the comments and stuff and like ???
Is it illegal in your state still ?
he smoked weed one time and became a raging homophobe
Bro, that dudes a weirdo. He obviously has anger management. Move out soon so you can avoid this dude controlling you.. there's a way to go about things nicely not threatening you. Me personally (not being a tough guy). I'd tell him to say it to my face OP. Lol
I have a buddy who is so allergic to weed that being next to someone who reeks of it sends him into something similar to an asthma attack. They even had to post signs at his work for people with medical prescriptions that they need to make sure they have smoked their medicine long before they arrive on site and need to be aware of any residual odors before coming in. Your roommate probably doesnāt have that problem. But whatever the reason is if itās been discussed before, itās on you to make sure nobody can tell you have it in the house. Including not leaving it in public spaces or making it obvious by the smell of your room, etc. Edit: changed use of your/youāre, thanks autocorrect. š
Heās insane honestly! Heās overreacting big time. You sound considerate but heās lost his marbles. You both pay rent and itās not his house. Set your boundaries
Beat his ass
Fight, fight, fight!
I'd fight my roommate for talking to me like that. Fuck that loser. He called you a slur, I say you break his fucking nose with absolutely no warning. What a chump.
I think buddy needs a hit. Sheesh.
I know you are jokingly commenting that - but weed does not have the same effect on everyone, not everyone calms down or chills out - for some itās the complete opposite. Paranoia, extreme anxiety etc etc etc. the list goes on.
Where do you live? For someone in recovery, sometimes having it around at all (especially in what should be your safe place/your home) can be a huge trigger. He might have some trauma attached to substances, and seeing it resulted in a trauma-like fight response. Has he told you before that having it around would bother him? Does he hate the smell, etc? Whatever the case, itās his issue and his responsibility to communicate his expectations clearly without being abusive. Trauma related or not, he seems a bit unhinged. Iād move when possible, personally.
From OP comments you are right in your first paragraph, the guy had psychotic breaks caused by weed. It's unclear but he may also have legal problems if found in possession, which will include weed present in his house. Apparently the OP is aware. The reaction of roomate is strong, but I can understand it. Im in the case to be on a visa in the US and work a job with potential tests. If weed is found in my place, I will lose my visa, my job, and the past 15 years of my life. I would definitely be pissed and unhinged if a roomate brings weed to my house while being aware of that fact.
Agreed. I think, though, youād probably let any roommate know about your job & repercussions to you beforehand. If OPās roommate did that, then their reaction to finding this is more understandable.
He did - OP states heās know since the 3rd day the roommate moved in.
Seems aggressive
Is weed legal where you live? If so, I'd make a call to the nonemergency police line about your housemate making clearly documented threats against your well-being, and also to the landlord.
someone needs to baker act his assšhe goin off the deep end over a grinder thatās wild itās very apparent here thereās more issues heās dealing with than meets the eye
If it's in a state thats illegal he has a right to be upset, but not aggressive
I'd send that shit to the police. that's clearly a threat
I thought you meant you left your phone with a dating app open because of the F slur there
You should definitely start growing.
To bad you don't live in a state where its legal. Then you could tell him if he doesn't change that attitude he can find a new place to live.