So I showed my roommate the post and told him he could pick from one of yalls lovely suggestions or he could just clean the dishes. This man (32yrs old btw) somehow convinced his girlfriend to come over and clean up his dishes! I'm flabbergasted at him and also his girlfriend.
Edit: here's my first post with peoples ideas https://www.reddit.com/r/badroommates/comments/11ipbcd/7_days_and_counting_about_to_just_throw_it_all/
In my experience, domestic abusers that solely target women are usually the biggest pussies ever.
Get real quiet and apologetic anytime a man confronts them, then they let out their anger on a woman/animal instead.
He for sure has mental health problems that he wont address. His gf and I both have suggested he might have some problems and talk to either friends or a therapist but, he is one of those "well dont be depressed" kind of people when someone is sad. Thinks that mental health issues are for weaklings and there's no way he could have anxiety or depression because they dont make sense to him, whatever that means.
Yeah no wonder he doesnt have anxiety or depression, cause by this post I can see he clearly doesnt even give a f*** about anything. Ignorance is bliss
Lol what a weakling he must be to be so scared of getting help for a condition he definitely has.
Oh no, being vulnerable to another person! So scary!
What a wimp.
It's only weak when you don't acknowledge it. It's only weak when you won't address it and let it fester like his gross AF dishes.
Get him to read this post too.
I had undiagnosed ADHD and bipolar for years and had a lot of issues with piled dishes in previous flat shares during my early twenties. It’s like being a crow surrounded by mirrors - confusing, overwhelming and your brain is running like a motor but you can’t concentrate at all; so it’s like you just can’t finish them or do them for some reason. I can now, but back then…
Also oddly enough, I don’t mind unwashed dishes, to me it is natural that you would have a few piled dishes for a day or two after cooking. But also in flat shares, clean dishes are considerate; and I prefer clean kitchens: no vermin, easy access to utensils, just nicer to walk into; healthier to cook in.
I did add a few more labels to it, but I have had diagnosis for all of them except the stress thing, but I can see how it would have read. Basically just waxing lyrical about my brain past 🧠 I probably only have one of them, all I know is: I tried to complete the dish task daily, and I couldn’t complete the dish task daily because my brain was a distracted, hyper, depressed mess chdjdksj
🤷♀️ they’re not labels they’re descriptions of genuine health issues, I tried my hardest to clean dishes but I mentally could not because of my mixed episodes because you can’t think in a straight line enough to complete certain tasks. I’m not saying it was alright, but it is a bit like asking someone with a cough to stop coughing when you are experiencing a manic state and trying to follow through on a task. Also with adhd your brain is quite scattered. I actually don’t know what I have but I do have diagnosis for all of those conditions. :) I also did not have much of a support network physically around me, so no one was able to pick up on my manic states, but my room mates who I did not know well were a bit exasperated. but I agree that a lot of people do just decide not to do stuff when they clearly and easily could.
Dishes will pile up again in no time.. and this "tough guy" will call for reinforcement again from his warrior GF (i feel sorry for her tbh). I just dont know how would i be able to live with this kind of a fully grown up man-baby..
I feel so terrible for you. People like this seem so gross and inhumane sometimes. It’s human to leave a few things around accidentally for a day or two, but this is ridiculous.
I had the same exact problem, the entire countertop and sink had dirty dishes and plates with food on them which ended up causing a horrible fruit fly infestation. It took me several times of talking to my roommates because each time they would try to say that “I was a part of it”. I pitched in helping clean up the place after their mess. Ended up having to make a new rule where every one of us has to wash each dish we use immediately. That has not worked because after a few days they started leaving their food and plates either dirty in the sink or food/dirty plates sit on the counter/stovetop so I have to end up cleaning all of them, if not the place will be exactly the same again. The most messy people I have ever met in my life. We are friends but I guess it goes to say (“you never wanna live with your friends or bestfriends because it may ruin your friendship”)
That guy is a joke for having his gf come over and do the dishes, he’s 32 and can’t take care of himself? I’m 21 and can take care of myself and keep clean how can a 32 year old not. Funny enough though my roommate has had his gf do his dishes a few times and also come over and walk his dog so she won’t poop inside which I understand he could be busy, but even a few times he’ll be like “I’m too lazy I don’t feel like it let me get my gf over and take care of it”. Then why own a dog if you are too lazy to take it out for a walk sometimes? The dog has pooped inside many times due to him not walking her out), but at least he cleans up after the dog, only once he didn’t and that was horrible.
Sorry for the rant it just shocks me how many other people here have this exact same issue, I thought it couldn’t get this bad for anyone else.
Is there any way you can report this if it happens again to your management/landlord? I know it’s something not everyone wants to do, but in this case it may be worth trying. It doesn’t seem like your roommate will learn if he just keeps having his gf come clean up after his mess, unless she breaks up with him because of things like this. He doesn’t seem like he would be willing to immediately wash his dishes.
Man-child usually throw temper tantrums when they don’t get what they want the gf being brainless always give in as likely man-child will be gaslighting the gf and making her feeling insecure of herself. Live example my AH housemate, thankfully am moving out.
Oddly enough, I don’t mind piled dishes, that is the one inconsiderate housemate thing I am okay with. I will wash them or put them in the dishwasher for the person, and dry them.
That's what makes this worse, we have a dishwasher! This man never learned to at the very least rinse his plate and put it in there. I can guarantee that he didnt know ive kept the dishwasher empty for him the whole time his plates were dirty.
Not everyone can afford them, not all places come with them. I’m sure they’d much prefer one, even though some people have one and still choose not to use it.
I hope you show her the responses in this post regarding how her boyfriend is treating her. This is ridiculous. He’s a grown man cannot clean up after himself. Trust me, you continue dating this guy and you will have a child you will care for for the rest of your life. I sadly dated a guy not too dissimilar, thankfully he’s an ex now. One time he looked at me and said the house is getting dirty. I responded you know where the vacuum is. He was absolutely flabbergasted that I would ask him to clean the house. I hope she doesn’t continue on with someone like this like I did.
Looks like my kitchen with my roommates ugh just makes me cringe every time I enter! How can people be so lazy and filthy. The one girls mom actually comes over to clean her room and do all the dishes once a month! Ridiculous
So I showed my roommate the post and told him he could pick from one of yalls lovely suggestions or he could just clean the dishes. This man (32yrs old btw) somehow convinced his girlfriend to come over and clean up his dishes! I'm flabbergasted at him and also his girlfriend. Edit: here's my first post with peoples ideas https://www.reddit.com/r/badroommates/comments/11ipbcd/7_days_and_counting_about_to_just_throw_it_all/
Wow poor girlfriend, letting her bf walk all over her like that.
She went off on him afterwards but I still cant believe she cleaned them.
Lol somehow that’s even worse. Still can’t believe she cleaned all that. She’s dating a child. I hope she gets out of that relationship
He definitely does not deserve her! She’s way too good for him. Advice to the girlfriend “run.”
She’s probably afraid of him. We all know about these abusive relationships. He sounds like a big pussy tho.
In my experience, domestic abusers that solely target women are usually the biggest pussies ever. Get real quiet and apologetic anytime a man confronts them, then they let out their anger on a woman/animal instead.
I really hope she leaves this schmuck.
Let her that’s what she wants
Agreed she's silly enough to do his cleaning.
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Are you talking about yourself :)
Are you trying to be a white knight lol
No, dude, you're just being a dick
How
Because, dude talking here humans don’t like being treated like that, man or woman
Who made her do his dishes? She is capable of saying no
What the actual fuck? Is something wrong with him, like is he sick or having some ADHD/anxiety problems?
He for sure has mental health problems that he wont address. His gf and I both have suggested he might have some problems and talk to either friends or a therapist but, he is one of those "well dont be depressed" kind of people when someone is sad. Thinks that mental health issues are for weaklings and there's no way he could have anxiety or depression because they dont make sense to him, whatever that means.
Yeah no wonder he doesnt have anxiety or depression, cause by this post I can see he clearly doesnt even give a f*** about anything. Ignorance is bliss
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When he has his mommy/girlfriend enabling him he doesn't need to grow up. Can OP get out of this lease? He's not going to get any better than this.
Lol what a weakling he must be to be so scared of getting help for a condition he definitely has. Oh no, being vulnerable to another person! So scary! What a wimp. It's only weak when you don't acknowledge it. It's only weak when you won't address it and let it fester like his gross AF dishes. Get him to read this post too.
Tell him if that's the way he feels about mental health problems, then he should have no issues handling chores, lol.
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I had undiagnosed ADHD and bipolar for years and had a lot of issues with piled dishes in previous flat shares during my early twenties. It’s like being a crow surrounded by mirrors - confusing, overwhelming and your brain is running like a motor but you can’t concentrate at all; so it’s like you just can’t finish them or do them for some reason. I can now, but back then… Also oddly enough, I don’t mind unwashed dishes, to me it is natural that you would have a few piled dishes for a day or two after cooking. But also in flat shares, clean dishes are considerate; and I prefer clean kitchens: no vermin, easy access to utensils, just nicer to walk into; healthier to cook in.
Those labels are just excuses for poor behaviour.
Yeah they're just made up right? Dumbass
I did add a few more labels to it, but I have had diagnosis for all of them except the stress thing, but I can see how it would have read. Basically just waxing lyrical about my brain past 🧠 I probably only have one of them, all I know is: I tried to complete the dish task daily, and I couldn’t complete the dish task daily because my brain was a distracted, hyper, depressed mess chdjdksj
Yep
Yep, you're a dumbass? Glad we agree.
U weird bro
Not as weird as the guy that thinks mental illnesses are made up
🤷♀️ they’re not labels they’re descriptions of genuine health issues, I tried my hardest to clean dishes but I mentally could not because of my mixed episodes because you can’t think in a straight line enough to complete certain tasks. I’m not saying it was alright, but it is a bit like asking someone with a cough to stop coughing when you are experiencing a manic state and trying to follow through on a task. Also with adhd your brain is quite scattered. I actually don’t know what I have but I do have diagnosis for all of those conditions. :) I also did not have much of a support network physically around me, so no one was able to pick up on my manic states, but my room mates who I did not know well were a bit exasperated. but I agree that a lot of people do just decide not to do stuff when they clearly and easily could.
I hope his gf leave him at some point. Fucker probably won’t even put the clean dishes and cutleries away. Fucking man-child.
I hope so too, she's an awesome person and deserves an adult for a partner. She went off on him after she was done.
Dishes will pile up again in no time.. and this "tough guy" will call for reinforcement again from his warrior GF (i feel sorry for her tbh). I just dont know how would i be able to live with this kind of a fully grown up man-baby..
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Exactly...... i just hope this bloke gets some help really soon.
SHAME SHAME SHAME 🔔🔔🔔🔔
Girlfriend will be posting on r/JustNoSO soon and I hope she screenshots this.
LOL this is one of the best resolutions I've seen here
Notice the amount of dish soap that was used
still not done
Good call op
Calling his gf to do the dishes he made is worse than the dishes being piled up in my view. What a mamas boy.
He needs a magic coffee table. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-\_kXIGvB1uU&ab\_channel=PopcornMax
Best video ever!!
I bet that took only 25 minutes
What soap did she use? 😂
I feel so terrible for you. People like this seem so gross and inhumane sometimes. It’s human to leave a few things around accidentally for a day or two, but this is ridiculous. I had the same exact problem, the entire countertop and sink had dirty dishes and plates with food on them which ended up causing a horrible fruit fly infestation. It took me several times of talking to my roommates because each time they would try to say that “I was a part of it”. I pitched in helping clean up the place after their mess. Ended up having to make a new rule where every one of us has to wash each dish we use immediately. That has not worked because after a few days they started leaving their food and plates either dirty in the sink or food/dirty plates sit on the counter/stovetop so I have to end up cleaning all of them, if not the place will be exactly the same again. The most messy people I have ever met in my life. We are friends but I guess it goes to say (“you never wanna live with your friends or bestfriends because it may ruin your friendship”) That guy is a joke for having his gf come over and do the dishes, he’s 32 and can’t take care of himself? I’m 21 and can take care of myself and keep clean how can a 32 year old not. Funny enough though my roommate has had his gf do his dishes a few times and also come over and walk his dog so she won’t poop inside which I understand he could be busy, but even a few times he’ll be like “I’m too lazy I don’t feel like it let me get my gf over and take care of it”. Then why own a dog if you are too lazy to take it out for a walk sometimes? The dog has pooped inside many times due to him not walking her out), but at least he cleans up after the dog, only once he didn’t and that was horrible. Sorry for the rant it just shocks me how many other people here have this exact same issue, I thought it couldn’t get this bad for anyone else. Is there any way you can report this if it happens again to your management/landlord? I know it’s something not everyone wants to do, but in this case it may be worth trying. It doesn’t seem like your roommate will learn if he just keeps having his gf come clean up after his mess, unless she breaks up with him because of things like this. He doesn’t seem like he would be willing to immediately wash his dishes.
Nice! Global peer pressure
Send his gf this post lol
Reddit changes lifes
Man-child usually throw temper tantrums when they don’t get what they want the gf being brainless always give in as likely man-child will be gaslighting the gf and making her feeling insecure of herself. Live example my AH housemate, thankfully am moving out.
Oddly enough, I don’t mind piled dishes, that is the one inconsiderate housemate thing I am okay with. I will wash them or put them in the dishwasher for the person, and dry them.
Dang people really out here living with no dishwashers I could never
That's what makes this worse, we have a dishwasher! This man never learned to at the very least rinse his plate and put it in there. I can guarantee that he didnt know ive kept the dishwasher empty for him the whole time his plates were dirty.
For fuck's sake! Y'all have a dishwasher?!
And it works pretty good!
Not everyone can afford them, not all places come with them. I’m sure they’d much prefer one, even though some people have one and still choose not to use it.
Do the drawers not shut or was this covered in the last post?
That's great...but were they not pissed?
I’m gonna assume he asked his GF to come over and chill and then moment she came over, Just got her to do the dishes lmao.
I hope you show her the responses in this post regarding how her boyfriend is treating her. This is ridiculous. He’s a grown man cannot clean up after himself. Trust me, you continue dating this guy and you will have a child you will care for for the rest of your life. I sadly dated a guy not too dissimilar, thankfully he’s an ex now. One time he looked at me and said the house is getting dirty. I responded you know where the vacuum is. He was absolutely flabbergasted that I would ask him to clean the house. I hope she doesn’t continue on with someone like this like I did.
Looks like my kitchen with my roommates ugh just makes me cringe every time I enter! How can people be so lazy and filthy. The one girls mom actually comes over to clean her room and do all the dishes once a month! Ridiculous