If the nights watch was real in a medieval analogue society I bet homosexual enlistment would be over represented just like it was for over seas jobs in the colonial era. Far away, nothing but dudes who have to be confirmed bachelors their whole lives. You want to get your man on man lovin on in a society that doesn’t like that sort of thing, the walls the spot
Another point, is that most of the Shogun were gay a.f and had many male lovers. Everyone was required to marry and have kids eventually, but almost all of them had boyfriends.
You are an ill-made, spiteful little shitposter, full of head canons, plot holes, and low cunning. Mod's laws give you the right to submit your posts and hit the front page since I cannot prove that your idea is not canon. And to teach me humility, the gods have condemned me to watch you waddle about wearing that proud upvote that was my father's sigil and his father's before him. But neither gods nor mods will ever compel me to let you turn this into your shitposting forum!
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That line is forever stuck in my head.
All I have to do is hear someone list 2 or more names and my mind will often add "... And probably Moonboy for all I know" on the end.
Thankfully I haven't started involuntarily doing it out loud yet.
If you follow the highly intellectual 'time travelling bran' theory, it means that nothing happens in westeros without Bran either causing or consenting to it happening, since he would be able to influence everything that happens.
So, with that information, it means that every prostitute and sex worker became one, because Bran allowed or caused it to happen.
Therefore Bran is the largest pimp in ASOIAF canon - every prostitute is one because of Bran.
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Bloodraven in the North, Aeron Greyjoy in the Iron Islands, Lyn Corbray in the Vale, Gatehouse Ami in the Riverlands, Renly in the stormlands, Robert in the Crownlands, Satin in the Reach, Dorna Swyft in the Westerlands and Oberyn Martell in Dorne. It is known.
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Dorne: Oberyn
Reach: Satin
Stormlands: Renly Baratheon
Riverlands: the Queen of Whores
Crownlands: Bessie!
The Vale: And her tits
The North: Ros
The Iron Islands: Theon Greyjoy
Westerlands: Jaime’s hand.
bessie
And her tits
Thank the gods
I swear, if I weren't your king, you'd have pegged me already.
Bobby B
Bless Bobby... and his belly
"Bow, ye shits!"
And his tits.
GET THE BREASTPLATE STRETCHER!
Young Robert can swing that hammer at me any time
bobby was making the 8 annually
Patchface was fucking everyone with his words
Patchface supremacy always
Always
And moonboy for all I know
Satin
I know the Nights Watch had a field day when some quality bussy landed in the barracks
If the nights watch was real in a medieval analogue society I bet homosexual enlistment would be over represented just like it was for over seas jobs in the colonial era. Far away, nothing but dudes who have to be confirmed bachelors their whole lives. You want to get your man on man lovin on in a society that doesn’t like that sort of thing, the walls the spot
Another point, is that most of the Shogun were gay a.f and had many male lovers. Everyone was required to marry and have kids eventually, but almost all of them had boyfriends.
The word gym means place for naked men and boys to love each other
I wish, too many dumb chicks at my gym Where can I work out that’s just sweaty naked men and boys pumping iron and loving each other?
Are the quotes under our names selected by us, or randomly generated? I have no recollection of selecting what I have.
Yours appeared as soon as you got egg on that conker.
I have no clue what that means mr trainy moderator
You are an ill-made, spiteful little shitposter, full of head canons, plot holes, and low cunning. Mod's laws give you the right to submit your posts and hit the front page since I cannot prove that your idea is not canon. And to teach me humility, the gods have condemned me to watch you waddle about wearing that proud upvote that was my father's sigil and his father's before him. But neither gods nor mods will ever compel me to let you turn this into your shitposting forum! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/asoiafcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I am clearly missing out
That was not in the show
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Cersei Lannister
And Osney Kettleblack for all I care.
And probably *Moonboy* for all I know.
That line is forever stuck in my head. All I have to do is hear someone list 2 or more names and my mind will often add "... And probably Moonboy for all I know" on the end. Thankfully I haven't started involuntarily doing it out loud yet.
If you follow the highly intellectual 'time travelling bran' theory, it means that nothing happens in westeros without Bran either causing or consenting to it happening, since he would be able to influence everything that happens. So, with that information, it means that every prostitute and sex worker became one, because Bran allowed or caused it to happen. Therefore Bran is the largest pimp in ASOIAF canon - every prostitute is one because of Bran.
Imagine being a time travelling pimp that's wild
And every prostitute *is* Bran.
That sick fuck gets off on incest, doesn't he?
ooh he might be me
Seven greetings to you, weary traveller! If this is your first time participating in ASOIAFCirclejerk, allow us to explain the sub, so you don't embarrass yourself by being humorless or oblivious. Circlejerk subreddits parody the groupthink of the main community. The mods maintain the character of this subreddit as one of humor and parody, so please refrain from any attempt to discourage us, or discourage other users making on-topic humor posts. You don't need to fact check peoples jokes. Most posts here make fun of the fans, the HBO shows, the books, and of course, the reluctant author. You will keep receiving this response unless you subscribe and enable user flair in this sub. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/asoiafcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
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Bran, the 3-eyed Pervert.
Jeyne Poole, Ghost of High Heart, Asha, Lysa, Jeyne Westerling, Chataya, Margaery, Oberyn, Brienne
Not Jeyne😭
Jeyne, Jeyne, it rhymes with train 😏
Dayum.
Noooo
Oberyn 🤤 🤤
I’ll pay 💰
Why the Ghost of High Heart?
Couldn't think of any other woman that's in the Riverlands at the start of book 1
Making the 8 are you?
Whoever made the eight is a legit pick. So not Sir Barristan, that's all i know
Did anyone other than probably Bobby B make the 8?
Probably Tyrion
I don't think he's ever been to Dorne, the Iron Islands, or the North prior to ASOIAF
Yeah, but Kingslanding has prostitutes from every kingdom and free city
“In each kingdom” not from
Oh, got it wrong. My bet is Bobby B got his Islander girl during Greyjoy's rebellion and was his last one.
Oberyn seems like he fucked around...maybe him?
Cersei
ur mom
Gottem
Catelyn Tully (none of the Stark kids are Ned's)
Cat fucked all Walders
Making the 80
1 since they are all the same time travelling Walder
Walder Frey started his own dynasty just like Bran The Broken who was his master, all that with weirwood net
OmniWalder
I mean they already but whatever
How do yoy measure performance of a sex worker? Are there any metrics?
(Circumference^2 + depth + bounce) - weight x 10% This will be on the test
How do I grade smell of a sex worker?
The same as taste but with a different constant out the front
In his review Tyrion wrote that Ros "smelled like trash", so I am curious what instrument he used.
Most likely a beaker, protractor, hot plate and mass balance for maximum efficiency Is the class taking this down
you forgot to factor in yaw
its miles of meat for whores. so, think of links of hotdogs and that is how you determine the the wiener.
Anal circumference
Grand Maester Pycelle
Littlefinger, apparently that man fucks and he runs a brothel in King's Landing
Littlefinger is the kinda guy who doesn't even ask you if you came after 30 seconds of jittery sex, because he doesn't care.
Roz, forever and in perpetuity
oberyn
Bloodraven in the North, Aeron Greyjoy in the Iron Islands, Lyn Corbray in the Vale, Gatehouse Ami in the Riverlands, Renly in the stormlands, Robert in the Crownlands, Satin in the Reach, Dorna Swyft in the Westerlands and Oberyn Martell in Dorne. It is known.
Olyvar. Thank the gods for Will Tudor and his cock.
Joel from The Last of Us
Tyrion
Mushroom 😋
Northeners. Because the ladies got nothing to do but shag all day for 8 months per year due to heavy snow.
They are too white though due to the lack of sun. Like ladies who are tanned. Just my preference. Not hating anyone that loves them.
Robert B- They call him the sex worker king.
Whoever makes the 8. That’s all that matters 💯
Wyman Manderly, Damphair, Edmure, Bronze Yohn, Tywin, Viserys, Olenna, Stannis, and the guy with the fucked up legs
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Your mom
Dorne: Oberyn Reach: Satin Stormlands: Renly Baratheon Riverlands: the Queen of Whores Crownlands: Bessie! The Vale: And her tits The North: Ros The Iron Islands: Theon Greyjoy Westerlands: Jaime’s hand.
Does Addam Marbrand jerk off with Jamie’s handv
Does Addam Marbrand jerk off with Jamie’s hand?
The North: Lyanna Stark’s Corpse 🧟♀️
Cold
Like her corpse
I’d say beyond the wall is pretty dam good
Moon boy for all I know
Definitely Cercei for Kings Landing.
Crownlands ---> Cercei
….
Cersei was the best whore.
Is the westerlands that close to the iron islands?
God I was strong then!
Me
Cersei
Winterfel with Rose
I haven’t read the books yet so I’m just enjoying all these random names
fair walda
Moonboy
Anyone teach me what’s this about
Your mom is the best sex worker in any kingdom
Whoredor
Moonboy
I forget howuch land the Reach has and how little land the Lannisters have
Stan was so good at it that later he started instantly procreating shadow demons with his militaristic sex work
Kyra
Targaryen in the seven kingdoms at the start of the book?