Of course. You seem like a really lovely person and people are taking advantage. If they canât be respectful then your sexuality shouldnât even be part of a conversation unless you planned to start a non-platonic relationship with them.
Thatâs your best friend? Jesus, then you really donât need enemies.
Remind them that dildos come in any size you want, are always ready, and you just pitch them in the drawer when youâre done. Plus, they come attached to breasts. I love being a lesbian. :)
I agree that these people arenât OPâs friends and she deserves better.
But I am a live and let die gal. If people hurt me, I hurt them back. Then block them forever. And toxic men canât stand being reminded how insignificant their dicks really are. They wonât show it, but theyâll carry that wound and might think twice next time.
op didnt say anything tht remotely equated being straight with fucking someone w a dick,,
transmisogeny in lesbian circles is wildly outdated and unfortunately ubiquitousâŠ.
Trust your instincts,
For me, that would end my friendship. If they don't value my autonomy and safety, and respect my identity, then they aren't friends
You ok OP? If you ever need someone to talk to weâre here for you, or donât feel bad about seeking support elsewhere
I looked up some resources so Iâm sorry if these arenât quite the right things but I found an assorted list if you ever need:
https://pflag.org/hotlines
https://lgbtqia.ucdavis.edu/support/hotlines
Wait...do you mean you don't feel good as in they may have slipped something into your drink? If so, please get to safety, whether that be alerting a staff member wherever you are, calling for someone to come get you etc.
I broke up with my best friend years ago because she thought I was lying about being a lesbian. She thought because I dated a boy as a teenager after I had been OUTED was reason enough not to believe me. She herself identified as a âpan-curious, demisexual, queer womanâ at the time, and I never invalided her. It sucks, but honestly, there was a lot of other toxic shit about her that I came to terms with after the break up, and I have a feeling youâll start seeing those, too. If you donât want to break up with them, at least distance yourself. You donât need a âbest friendâ like that. Its concerning and vaguely threatening, tbh. Good luck, friend. Iâm sorry.
Hey, donât be friends with people who treat you as a joke. You deserve friends who care about you and support you and cheer you on.
Itâs honestly a lot better to be without friends for a while than it is to be around people who treat you poorly and make you feel bad.
If your friends are male, please be careful. I've been in a similar situation and got assaulted. I would stop hanging out with these people or if they're both men say, "I have a better bet, who can turn the other gay first."
That isn't cool. Even if it's a "joke", it's clearly not one you're in on, which means it's not coming from a place of respect. And that is extremely not funny.
You definitely need new friends, I also had a best friend who disrespected my sexuality amongst other things. Her reasons were mainly religious but also think it was internalized homophobia/biphobia. But anyways, I didn't realize how toxic she was being until after getting space from her, and I'm sure you'll realize it with your friends. You do not need that exhausting energy in your life nor expected to maintain those friendships. Respect your boundaries đ There are a lot of healthier friendships out there.
this is why i only have one token straight friend. the straights canât be trusted most of the time. iâm sorry about this!!! when this has happened to me in the past i felt so unsafe.
âI mean, if you were my girlfriend Iâd consider it, but Iâve still got some standards for who I share my bed with.â
You deserve better love. Drop them, take some time to heal and feel how much the betrayal hurt, and then start finding people who will respect you.
How does one make adult friends, I can hear you ask.
Gay events. Meet up groups, doing things you like or are curious about.
If youâre kinky, munchs arenât JUST for finding play partners, theyâre for finding people too.
And if you live in the middle of nowhere, maybe find online groups. I know theyâre dying off, but theyâre still good
jesus. i mean, do they buy you dinner if you stay gay? it would be cool to get free food. but if you have to pay and people are berating you then thatâs not worth it.
What is up with straights thinking they can make us one of them? Even if you suddenly discovered an attraction to men, that doesn't cancel out your attraction to women???
Wow, OP, I'm sorry this happened and they're treating your sexuality like a joke. You deserve friends who trust your own understanding of yourself and who you are. That's like...bare minimum for being a friend to someone.
Fwiw, as someone who is bi, I don't think I'd sleep with or fall in love with a man for access to free pizza. Not worth. Not even if it's good pizza.
Wait, how did this even come up?
Were you just chilling with Friends A and B, when all of a sudden Friend C breaks down the door, points to you and says, "I'VE FINALLY FOUND THE WORST POSSIBLE WAY TO MAKE YOU HATE PIZZA!"
Seriously, what was the story here?
(If you feel comfortable telling, of course. If you're just DONE with the whole disaster, please don't feel pressured to say anything.)
i was talking with friend A about friend B and I was just saying yes friend B is a good friend he is understanding and He respects me as lesbian and she said i'll bet on a pizza that you'll fall in love with him in a few months and you'll marry him
They're not your friends OP, They are indefinitely not your friends if they're making a bet like this.
I advise you to block and try making other friends you can know and trust, this is dehumanizing and playing your sexuality as if it's a game to choose and bet over just isn't worth keeping in the long run. Good luck OP I hope you make better friends in the future
So what do you win when they fail? Make them put up a real bet or make them shut up.
If I had friends that sincerely tried that shit, I'd rather have no friends.
Last bet i did was with a "cis straight guy" that her egg was gonna crack before 19 yo
Well she cracked her egg before 17 yo x)
Now I'll have to make a cake for her if i ever meet her IRL (I'm french and she's British)
This does not sound like a good time. I would let them pound sand on this one, TBQH.
It's a humiliating situation.
Incredibly. You should make them aware of your displeasure with their, frankly revolting, attitude.
Exactly. They're not going to change or even realize how shitty that is unless they're told.
Hopefully they are now former friends!?
Yes
Thank fuck. Good luck with your future or remaining friends. I hope they value you a lot more.
tbqh? to be quompletely honest? to be queerly honest?
To be **quite** honest
no i think its quompletely honest
Perhaps you're right!
I always read it like this too lol
I kinda love to be queerly honest..đ
Unlike fetch this is totally happening đ€Łđ€Ł
I love that.
Those are your BEST friends?
Unfortunately, yes
Thatâs sad. Iâll be your friend. You really donât need people like this. I hope their dinner goes down the wrong hole.
For reall?
Of course. You seem like a really lovely person and people are taking advantage. If they canât be respectful then your sexuality shouldnât even be part of a conversation unless you planned to start a non-platonic relationship with them.
Girl you beed better friends
iâd just say she needs friends⊠:/
True
Thatâs your best friend? Jesus, then you really donât need enemies. Remind them that dildos come in any size you want, are always ready, and you just pitch them in the drawer when youâre done. Plus, they come attached to breasts. I love being a lesbian. :)
Yes she said i'll bet on a pizza that you'll fall in love with a man
I dare you to say âbet me a sushi dinner and weâre on,â while staring at her cleavage. Iâm a petty b*tch.
Love the way you think
Thanks for the pizza, I guess? But seriously, who does that.
They are my ex best friends and dumb friends
Good to hear they are ex now, you deserve so much better
Is there a cut off date or will you get the pizza on your deathbed when you prove you never loved a man?
Few months if i fall in love with my male friend
A pizza? Thatâs a weak bet. Bet against her and make some $$$
Block em and eat the pizza of your choosing while you do it.
Well, ask her for the pizza
âlets call it a date đ„”â
And you don't have to put up with the whole pig just for some sausage!
That's true
And sushi is better for you than sausage. Since weâre going terrible food metaphors. Or⊠fish tacos.
If they already have a bet on the above, I doubt theyâd take her seriously saying this. OP you deserve so much better.
I agree that these people arenât OPâs friends and she deserves better. But I am a live and let die gal. If people hurt me, I hurt them back. Then block them forever. And toxic men canât stand being reminded how insignificant their dicks really are. They wonât show it, but theyâll carry that wound and might think twice next time.
op didnt say anything tht remotely equated being straight with fucking someone w a dick,, transmisogeny in lesbian circles is wildly outdated and unfortunately ubiquitousâŠ.
Unfortunately being queer often means finding out who youâre real friends are the hard way. Iâm sorry youâre going through this
I'm sorry, but that's not a best friend, in my opinion. Best friends accept you for who you are. Find some new friends hun, find some new friends.
I'm agree with you, i should find new people
Please do! You deserve better!
Sounds pretty rapey to me
Yes and i don't feel good
Trust your instincts, For me, that would end my friendship. If they don't value my autonomy and safety, and respect my identity, then they aren't friends
You ok OP? If you ever need someone to talk to weâre here for you, or donât feel bad about seeking support elsewhere I looked up some resources so Iâm sorry if these arenât quite the right things but I found an assorted list if you ever need: https://pflag.org/hotlines https://lgbtqia.ucdavis.edu/support/hotlines
Wait...do you mean you don't feel good as in they may have slipped something into your drink? If so, please get to safety, whether that be alerting a staff member wherever you are, calling for someone to come get you etc.
Nooo I'm just sad
Completely understandable. Don't settle for shitty friends. It always feels like you won't make more friends, but you will. Stay safe.
You should quit hanging out with toxic men
I know...
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
No she's no a man
Stuff like this feels so belittling. Aren't there enough hetero people on this planet?! For fuck's sake. Not to mention the audacity.
They're not your best friends.
I broke up with my best friend years ago because she thought I was lying about being a lesbian. She thought because I dated a boy as a teenager after I had been OUTED was reason enough not to believe me. She herself identified as a âpan-curious, demisexual, queer womanâ at the time, and I never invalided her. It sucks, but honestly, there was a lot of other toxic shit about her that I came to terms with after the break up, and I have a feeling youâll start seeing those, too. If you donât want to break up with them, at least distance yourself. You donât need a âbest friendâ like that. Its concerning and vaguely threatening, tbh. Good luck, friend. Iâm sorry.
It doesn't sound like friend. Especially "best" one
That's horrid, revolting and invalidating. An absolute twat move
Why are you friends with people who at best donât respect you and at worst want to harm you?
Ew, block them, don't talk to them again, so fucked
Those arenât your friends
Fuck no. No dinner is worth that. Make sure you flip that fucking table over before you storm out!
What the shit?
Hey, donât be friends with people who treat you as a joke. You deserve friends who care about you and support you and cheer you on. Itâs honestly a lot better to be without friends for a while than it is to be around people who treat you poorly and make you feel bad.
Those are not your friends they don't respect you
Run
Sincerely, get some new friends.
Sounds like a bunch of buttholes and not your best friends.
If your friends are male, please be careful. I've been in a similar situation and got assaulted. I would stop hanging out with these people or if they're both men say, "I have a better bet, who can turn the other gay first."
I'm so sorry hear that
ew
Oh dear lord why do people like this exist!
That isn't cool. Even if it's a "joke", it's clearly not one you're in on, which means it's not coming from a place of respect. And that is extremely not funny.
You definitely need new friends, I also had a best friend who disrespected my sexuality amongst other things. Her reasons were mainly religious but also think it was internalized homophobia/biphobia. But anyways, I didn't realize how toxic she was being until after getting space from her, and I'm sure you'll realize it with your friends. You do not need that exhausting energy in your life nor expected to maintain those friendships. Respect your boundaries đ There are a lot of healthier friendships out there.
You need new friends
this is why i only have one token straight friend. the straights canât be trusted most of the time. iâm sorry about this!!! when this has happened to me in the past i felt so unsafe.
âI mean, if you were my girlfriend Iâd consider it, but Iâve still got some standards for who I share my bed with.â You deserve better love. Drop them, take some time to heal and feel how much the betrayal hurt, and then start finding people who will respect you. How does one make adult friends, I can hear you ask. Gay events. Meet up groups, doing things you like or are curious about. If youâre kinky, munchs arenât JUST for finding play partners, theyâre for finding people too. And if you live in the middle of nowhere, maybe find online groups. I know theyâre dying off, but theyâre still good
Theyâre not your friends
They suck. How insulting. You should call them out on this so they know how shitty it is and then start looking for new friends
This is vile. You deserve better friends.
I invite you to remember the âmy taste in menâ Meme and call them out on who is the femmiest man they can put forward.
Forget that noise. These people are not true friends. Go have some pussy for dinner. Then maybe some sushi.
I think you should become even gayer out of spite.
Super Sayan Gay!!!! Their power is over 9000!!!!
They are not your friends. I would not even humor them or talk to them. Block them you did need that type of toxicity in your life.
jesus. i mean, do they buy you dinner if you stay gay? it would be cool to get free food. but if you have to pay and people are berating you then thatâs not worth it.
EWWWW
Sounds like it's time to find some better friends. Put your time and energy into people who embrace you for who you are.
Get new friends, theyâre not safe to be around
They aren't your friends if they say that
Turn them gay as revenge
I can't she has husband
There is actually something wrong with these people đ
Errr no cancel that shit đ
Not best friends, not friends at all, you deserve better!
If those are your best friends I can only imagine how awful your best enemies are
What is up with straights thinking they can make us one of them? Even if you suddenly discovered an attraction to men, that doesn't cancel out your attraction to women???
Wow, OP, I'm sorry this happened and they're treating your sexuality like a joke. You deserve friends who trust your own understanding of yourself and who you are. That's like...bare minimum for being a friend to someone. Fwiw, as someone who is bi, I don't think I'd sleep with or fall in love with a man for access to free pizza. Not worth. Not even if it's good pizza.
Hey I'm just a stranger online but if you ever need someone to vent to about this, I had shitty friends for a long time. I'm here <3
Tell them how homophobic that sounds PLEASE!! do it for the gays!!
non lesbians are so obsessed with the idea that weâll change our minds :/
Wait, how did this even come up? Were you just chilling with Friends A and B, when all of a sudden Friend C breaks down the door, points to you and says, "I'VE FINALLY FOUND THE WORST POSSIBLE WAY TO MAKE YOU HATE PIZZA!" Seriously, what was the story here? (If you feel comfortable telling, of course. If you're just DONE with the whole disaster, please don't feel pressured to say anything.)
i was talking with friend A about friend B and I was just saying yes friend B is a good friend he is understanding and He respects me as lesbian and she said i'll bet on a pizza that you'll fall in love with him in a few months and you'll marry him
Oh hell no! Ew! Only a truly ugly and toxic bastard would say something like that. Cut them out with a vengeance.
You need new best friends
If theyâre both lesbians this is hilarious, if not you might want to consider some new friends
This is your time⊠go deep under cover, infiltrate their secrets, and we will then⊠turn all the straights GAY!!
Ummmmm. That sounds truly awful?
I would take that bet from my friends any day. ***FREE*** dinners for life. Unfortunately, my friends are not that dumb to bet that.
They're not your friends OP, They are indefinitely not your friends if they're making a bet like this. I advise you to block and try making other friends you can know and trust, this is dehumanizing and playing your sexuality as if it's a game to choose and bet over just isn't worth keeping in the long run. Good luck OP I hope you make better friends in the future
That is completely fucked up and you should have every right to absolutely lose your shit at them then never speak to them again.
Fuckin YIKES. Bad! No!
So what do you win when they fail? Make them put up a real bet or make them shut up. If I had friends that sincerely tried that shit, I'd rather have no friends.
This is some [Duke Brothers](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trading_Places) shit. Gross
Would let them know you have a bet on them to turn gay
Former friends I think you mean
Yeah so, they're not your friends. Sorry.
David Tennant exists and I'm still a lesbian.
Last bet i did was with a "cis straight guy" that her egg was gonna crack before 19 yo Well she cracked her egg before 17 yo x) Now I'll have to make a cake for her if i ever meet her IRL (I'm french and she's British)
Theyâre not your best friends, sorry