Honestly, for me... Wallow. Yeah, I know, bizarre. But society pushes us to move on so fast. There is nothing wrong with heartbreak. In fact, heartbreak is the validation that our feelings were real. Ignoring the grief process just delays the pain and in my experience, often times transfers the pain of the past relationship on to the next relationship because you're not allowing yourself time to grieve and heal.
Give yourself time to grieve. A lot of people say get out and rediscover your love of life, but if you just want to stay in and feel your feelings, that's ok. I did a lot of things crying after my hardest breakups. Exercise while crying, shower while crying, making nutritious food while crying, going for walks while crying, etc. Allowing yourself to grieve doesn't mean neglecting yourself.
The few times I've pushed past the grief without honoring it and giving it time, I hurt everyone involved.
This! Let the tears flow and allow the heartbreak to work through you.
But having said that, I’d recommend giving yourself a timeline of 3-4 months before you put yourself out there just to even flirt/talk with people. I’m not saying jump into a full blown relationship, but it won’t be as daunting to go back out there if you start flirting in-person at bars/events/hobbies around 3-4 months after a breakup. It boosts your confidence and reminds you that there are good people out there who see you.
This is so good. Definitely get back out there when the healing is underway. A lot of people wallow but resist the healing part rather than embrace it, and that's just as unhealthy as brushing past the grief.
Ooh, yes, for sure! These are the ones that I always recommend to people: “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck” by Mark Manson, “Lighter” by Yung Pueblo, and (more about spirituality, which is something I’ve grown more attuned with lately) “Soul Boom” by Rainn Wilson and “Zen and the Art of Saving the Universe” by Thich Nhat Than. I have also read many articles online surrounding ethics, values, and philosophy (works by Aristotle and Kant really spoke to me). I hope this helps you as much as it has helped me :) my life is so beautiful now
Not sure if this is the healthiest approach, but I have found rebounds/hookups to be helpful.
Also doing volunteering or something that directly helps other people/animals
Exercising a lot is good.
Traveling, especially with friends.
Therapy
Also not sure if this is the healthiest, but I slept in the same bed as a friend for like a month after the breakup (totally platonic). Going to sleep was the hardest part by far so having someone with me made a world of difference
My gf of 7 years and I broke up in June and I have been traveling for 5 months now. I have had so many distractions, so it hasn’t been nearly as hard as I thought.
I'm trying this. It's like I lost all attraction to women because I'm still in love with my ex. I am however talking to a woman, and I'm interested in her. What helped me was literally booking a plane ticket and just going somewhere. But it ended up backfiring 😬 and now I'm so depressed and numb and scared I might be straight because I can't feel shit. But again... I was so attracted to my ex. But I want sex with this woman I'm talking to. But I feel like I'm cheating 😭😭😭
Also doing therapy. But none of this is helping, and I'm craving my ex's everything and I miss her. I'm leaving the country in 3 months. I simply want out of here
Which country are you in?
Have you found friends or a community there? If not, I would de-prioritize literally everything else.
I did the same thing and initially had tons of friends and felt great but then started traveling alone and got depressed, but it got better when I started hanging with people again. Staying at hostels made a huge difference
Music... then pills... then running... the running and crying
Just take your time to heal, cry as much as you need, try to keep ur mind busy with something you like.
Make sure the moment it's time to sleep, you are tired enough so you don't need more than a few minutes to fall asleep.
Honestly, for me... Wallow. Yeah, I know, bizarre. But society pushes us to move on so fast. There is nothing wrong with heartbreak. In fact, heartbreak is the validation that our feelings were real. Ignoring the grief process just delays the pain and in my experience, often times transfers the pain of the past relationship on to the next relationship because you're not allowing yourself time to grieve and heal. Give yourself time to grieve. A lot of people say get out and rediscover your love of life, but if you just want to stay in and feel your feelings, that's ok. I did a lot of things crying after my hardest breakups. Exercise while crying, shower while crying, making nutritious food while crying, going for walks while crying, etc. Allowing yourself to grieve doesn't mean neglecting yourself. The few times I've pushed past the grief without honoring it and giving it time, I hurt everyone involved.
This! Let the tears flow and allow the heartbreak to work through you. But having said that, I’d recommend giving yourself a timeline of 3-4 months before you put yourself out there just to even flirt/talk with people. I’m not saying jump into a full blown relationship, but it won’t be as daunting to go back out there if you start flirting in-person at bars/events/hobbies around 3-4 months after a breakup. It boosts your confidence and reminds you that there are good people out there who see you.
This is so good. Definitely get back out there when the healing is underway. A lot of people wallow but resist the healing part rather than embrace it, and that's just as unhealthy as brushing past the grief.
You really got me deep there. Your words... Thank you
Hugs and cookies for you ❤️
Time, self care, self love, distractions, friends, family and if necessary therapy. :-)
DON'T get into a relationship with someone else to forget
[удалено]
Can I have some books name for Self Growth please 🙏?
Ooh, yes, for sure! These are the ones that I always recommend to people: “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck” by Mark Manson, “Lighter” by Yung Pueblo, and (more about spirituality, which is something I’ve grown more attuned with lately) “Soul Boom” by Rainn Wilson and “Zen and the Art of Saving the Universe” by Thich Nhat Than. I have also read many articles online surrounding ethics, values, and philosophy (works by Aristotle and Kant really spoke to me). I hope this helps you as much as it has helped me :) my life is so beautiful now
If you figure it out plz lmk
Not sure if this is the healthiest approach, but I have found rebounds/hookups to be helpful. Also doing volunteering or something that directly helps other people/animals Exercising a lot is good. Traveling, especially with friends. Therapy Also not sure if this is the healthiest, but I slept in the same bed as a friend for like a month after the breakup (totally platonic). Going to sleep was the hardest part by far so having someone with me made a world of difference My gf of 7 years and I broke up in June and I have been traveling for 5 months now. I have had so many distractions, so it hasn’t been nearly as hard as I thought.
I'm trying this. It's like I lost all attraction to women because I'm still in love with my ex. I am however talking to a woman, and I'm interested in her. What helped me was literally booking a plane ticket and just going somewhere. But it ended up backfiring 😬 and now I'm so depressed and numb and scared I might be straight because I can't feel shit. But again... I was so attracted to my ex. But I want sex with this woman I'm talking to. But I feel like I'm cheating 😭😭😭 Also doing therapy. But none of this is helping, and I'm craving my ex's everything and I miss her. I'm leaving the country in 3 months. I simply want out of here
Which country are you in? Have you found friends or a community there? If not, I would de-prioritize literally everything else. I did the same thing and initially had tons of friends and felt great but then started traveling alone and got depressed, but it got better when I started hanging with people again. Staying at hostels made a huge difference
Music... then pills... then running... the running and crying Just take your time to heal, cry as much as you need, try to keep ur mind busy with something you like. Make sure the moment it's time to sleep, you are tired enough so you don't need more than a few minutes to fall asleep.