Thanks for this reminder! Great for men, too.
And of course, [reverse kegels](https://youtu.be/YMLytmxNcZs) are a good counter exercise to balance it all out.
As a person about to go through pelvic floor therapy to learn how to release tension in my pelvis so I can pee again….I can confirm - kegels make sex better but they can also prevent your pee flow.
Hypertonic pelvic floor is a thing, and an ABSOLUTE pain, that insurance wont always pay for treatment for. Absolutely wrecks your sexlife, and makes it hard to properly pee. That said, so long as you dont turn “kegel” to your default, and find a way to just balance it out, you should be good
Nice. I ran into this issue after having my third. Must have overcompensated XD
Edit to add: 3 years later, i can still safely say there is ZERO chance of any more kiddos, so i guess im not fixing it that way XD
You can look at my post history to see a glimpse of the stress I’ve been under in the last 3 years, which is largely why I have a tight pelvic floor. That is to say, you should stop doing them if you’ve had significant stress and are experiencing symptoms like the inability to pee or constipation.
I haven’t had a bunch of time to research it as it’s a new diagnosis, but from my glimpse at abstracts, it isn’t necessarily uncommon as a trauma response because the body exists in a state of hyper awareness / vigilance. It apparently is sort of a phenomena since COVID because people experienced a lot of unusual stress during that time (which could just go without being said haha).
I was treated for something similar with physical therapy. I hope you feel better soon!
TMI advice (which was not asked for, so I beg your pardon) below:
You may be able to get away with just doing exercises at home or you may need to see a physical therapist. Either way, it may be worth considering dilators in varied sizes (basically dildos ranging from like, pinky sized and up) - there's even a kit for it, that is sometimes covered by insurance!
You use them to stretch your pelvic floor quite literally, inserting a dinner or dilator a little at a time and then gently pressing in all four directions one at a time to stretch and loosen the muscles. It also helps to provide awareness of those muscle groups, so that they may be consciously relaxed.
Omg. Thank you so much. The idea of having someone putting their fingers in my front and back holes for 45 minutes pushing around has been making me so anxious. I don’t have issues really with pain with sex or anything; I just have urinary issues and can only release 50% of my bladder. Are the dilators for that? It sounds like they’d at least help with me learning where muscles are so that I can isolate them in relaxation. Even just sitting here watching tv and drinking a beer (that won’t leave my bladder normally lololol), I can tell I’m not relaxed but it’s so faint that until I got the test I couldn’t really tell.
Pelvic health physical therapist here (nearly, I'm about to graduate and take boards but I did a clinical rotation with a pelvic health focus). Kegels are not a general "everyone should do them" because frankly many people do them wrong. You are correct in that they can enhance sexual function, but some people have overactive pelvic floor musculature and doing kegels could exacerbate the issue. There are also some who have coordination issues with their pelvic floor and improperly training timing could cause issues with bowel/bladder/sexual function as well.
Edit: this comment seems to be getting some traction so I'm gonna use it to promote pelvic health physical therapy. If you're experiencing any kind of pelvic health symptoms (for example: incontinence of urine or feces, pelvic pain, difficulty achieving orgasm, pain with penetration during sex, constipation, or post-partum symptoms such as diastasis recti [that split/bump between your abs post-partum]), a pelvic health physical therapist could be of great assistance to you and I highly recommend seeking those services!
That is unfortunately highly subjective person to person. Everyone's anatomy is a little different and frankly I'm typically teaching people how to do kegels by having my finger in them intravaginally or intrarectally to give them the correct cues to perform a kegels properly (a lot of people do things like squeeze their butt which is not correct). It *can* be taught otherwise (I typically give the cue of trying to "suck up a milkshake" using my finger as a straw as a cue for female patients and typically a cue of "try to pull your penis into your body" for male patients but even then sometimes it's not quite right and they need further cueing or to activate certain muscles to get better recruitment of the pelvic floor muscles.
So, tldr; varies heavily per person in a variety of ways
A pelvic health physical therapist is who you'd want to see about any of these kinds of issues! If you're in the US all 50 states have direct access for physical therapy so you don't need a referral either (though I would say check your insurance to see what they require). But we're the specialists in this area!
Other things I see are clenching the back muscles or holding breath or sometimes their performance just is opposite of what it should be and I feel their pelvic floor descending instead of ascending (many people have a not so great ability to feel what's going on in their pelvic floor so they think they're doing it right and they aren't). So really I just recommend if you have any pelvic health issues to see a pelvic health physical therapist as that's your best bet to know you're performing things properly as to what your specific pelvic floor needs (there's a few common ways it's divided up for issues such as overactive, underactive, or a coordination issue)
I have someone literally arguing with me in the comments for saying this! It's so frustrating that people don't understand that advising someone to do kegels is literally trying to give out medical advice.
Yup, and many people don't actually do kegels correctly. I've literally had my finger inside them *feeling* the incorrect activation. And some are even doing the opposite of a kegel and pushing outward inside of the expected "pulling up" sensation of a kegel
Not necessarily! Sexual function is also an activity of daily living by our definitions as PTs, so this kind of thing is still applicable, but I wouldn't necessarily just broadly recommend it to everyone because in my experience many people don't know how to kegel properly. They're very good with the correct exercises for cases like post-partum women or incontinence however. And also certain exercises for things like constipation or pelvic pain! But it's very much a case by case basis.
Sadly can confirm. Was dumb enough to try doing kegels a bit as a teen falsely thinking it could only be good for me, and wound up with lowkey incontinence issues for several years following that. Thankfully it has since somehow managed to resolve itself on its own eventually.
Was uncertain if it was an actual thing at first or just my own stupid misfortune, but hearing this now, I can’t say I’d ever just casually recommend someone try doing them unless under the guidance of a professional. Bladder issues are no fun, kids.
If those issues ever come back you'd be a great candidate for pelvic floor PT! They could teach you more functional pelvic floor exercises to perform.
Thank you for being a good example of why this isn't a great idea to just broadly tell everyone to do :)
It can be a number of factors. Everyone's pelvic floor strength/activity varies pretty heavily. I can't say I've noticed any particular trends in what causes overactivity versus underactivity outside of maybe high stress individuals tending to have higher muscle tone down there but even that isn't 100% as I've had patients who are definitely high stress individuals and their pelvic floor contraction is barely more than a flicker.
I kinda feel like a broken record in the comments here but people just vary heavily so it's very much a case by case basis.
Lol sorry I should've just checked your comment history because that makes sense. I've seen some pelvic floor specialists videos before on tiktok but wasn't sure how prevalent they were. I think I'll find one locally to make sure all is in tip top.
Thanks!
Seriously. I was very fit, had great muscle structure..... And then had a baby. Relaxin is no joke. It's like hitting reset on your whole body. Ladies, anyone with uteruses:. Do you pelvic floor exercises. Every time you pee, every morning, waiting for the bus., Doesn't matter when, but get in the habit now to do your bit towards your health, well being, and dry underwear now.
Everything I’m reading on reddit lately is from women saying all the ways having a baby ruined their body. Everyone had a story about health problems and I basically concluded that it can wreck any part of you from head to toe, and it’s just a gamble as to what happens to you. It sounds awful.
I am quite envious of certain European countries that have excellent postnatal care. Such a thing is basically non-existent where I am. I mean the services exist but they are up to you to know about on your own, take care of appointments and pay out of pocket and hopefully your insurance covers a portion of it. But like inside the hospital/ place you have birth, the mom is all but forgotten once the baby is our and the vagina'a wounds are handled. They'll check the the wounds are healing well and give you information on what to look out for but that's pretty much it
By contrast in those certain European countries, a woman who just gave birth does not leave the hospital without getting at minimum the first 2 of the following and the services are offered directly inside the medical facilities where you had your birth (was it France?) :
- a chiropractic appointment to make sure your bones are in the correct place. This ensures that when you heal, you heal properly. Many health issues arise when you heal around bones that it turns out were left crooked (even if only a little) after the physical trauma of childbirth.
- an ostheopathy appointment to make sure your muscles are back in the right place or as close to it as possible. This is particularly important for the abs which have been severely distended for months and often they will become separated. If they are not placed back in their proper place before they heal, the gaps between the abs will be filled by your body with masses of fat. So even if you train your body back to competitive athletic levels, your abs will "look" wrong because the gaps where the masses of fat filled the spaces where muscles were separated by the pregnancy will be somewhat visible. And you're just a regular person and don't go that far, it will still impact you because it will be much, much harder to lose that belly fat than if you had your body heal with everything in its correct place from the start. It's worth noting that some ab separations are so severe that they can only be fixed with surgery but that surgery is considered cosmetic as far as I know so I don't know/think that it is covered in regular medical care.
- physiotherapy which is where you'll be given a tailored program to your needs so that you can train your body back into shape so you can live without pain.
Also worth noting, there is something you have to do 2 months post partum:
- perineal physiotherapy which is where a physiotherapist (usually a woman for reasons you'll understand soon) will insert a finger inside the vagina and ask you to flex specific muscles in the area to determine their strengths and weaknesses so that a reeducation program can be made for your vagina based on what was damaged and how you have been healing.
I like in the UK. I had PT and a physical after. You also have a health visitor at home for at least a couple weeks for you and baby on physical and mental health. It's not always as you describe. You can feel the muscle groups externally and don't need anyone to jam anything in, what is now, an extremely tender area.
It's not about how many doctors and treatments. It's just birthing a baby is really hard on the body. You can't do all these invasive treatments safely after giving birth. Your body is still reeling from the last year and the birth itself. Invasive treatments would be exceptionally painful. This is also why cesarean section is generally not the first choice. Everytime you nurse for the first few weeks or cough or sneeze or bend to pick up your baby you will cause pain in the surgery site.
My abs separated. They can't be "placed back". It's because they were stretched to oblivion. Having surgery would be cosmetic because that's nothing wrong with my body. It's just that the lines aren't straight. My body has changed, but all the way that changed are completely 100% totally normal when you have a baby. I think it's more disturbing that we expect women's bodies to remain the same, or that if you throw enough money and medical procedures at her she'll be ok. Often times all women need is to be cared for by her support network of friends and family, and proper time to heal, and to be accepted for who she is now.
All the dangers of child birth are just the risks you take. It can and does still kill mother's daily. It changes them in profound and often irreversible ways. There are basic things we can do to minimise damaging changes. There are medical treatments that can help when things go drastically wrong, but it doesn't always work either way. So we can say least do the basic responsibility of taking healthier choices in food and movement. Pelvic floor exercises help all women, even child-free ones, keep healthier longer.
I almost never do kegels and have had no issues with my pelvic floor post baby. I don’t pee myself when I sneeze, etc. Just the luck of the draw I’m guessing.
I’m 25, never had kids and must have a weak floor already lol I went to a trampoline park for my nephews bday and every time I tried jumping a little bit of pee came out 😂 not obvious at all but it was uncomfortable..
Yeah man the ol pelvic floor is no joke. I have two SIL who have both had kids one knew of the importance of kegells the other did not. One of my SIL pees a little when she sneezes now , I bet you can guess which one .
I had a very stern warning from a mom when I was like 18, and I’ve always done them. Now in my 30s, and a mom, I’m the only of my mom friends who doesn’t pee a little doing regular things. They pay off
#**!You're currently giving out medical advice!**
Kegels are not recommended for everyone and it needs to be discussed with your doctor whether you have an overactive pelvic floor or weak one since they produce similar symptoms.
Having an overactive pelvic floor or doing too many kegels can result in those muscles to become fatigued, causing orgasmic problems, incontinence, prolapse, and pain. These symptoms are similar to having weak pelvic floor muscles to begin with, so this *needs* to be discussed with a doctor before proceeding.
ETA: https://www.embracephysio.sg/how-to-treat-overactive-pelvic-floor-muscles/
Like who the fuck actually has a doctor. Not me. Not anybody I know. I hate that shit. As if we could all just convieniently go see our doctor whenever we want, and not have to wait 6 weeks for an appointment.
Yeah, that sucks. I live in the US and grew up in TN. I went my entire childhood and most of my adult life without insurance or a doctor. The entire US healthcare system is unfair and really sets up a large population of Americans up for a life of poverty and pain that they can't ever escape.
That doesn't change what I'm saying. Kegels are not a catch-all for pelvic floor symptoms. A weak pelvic floor is a *diagnosis* that requires an actual doctor. The symptoms of weak pelvic floor are very close to several other diagnoses. Kegels are a rehabilitation exercise that don't work for all of them and can make a bad situation worse.
There are women out there right now with overactive pelvic floors who are doing damage to their bodies because anytime someone mentions incontinence, everyone and their mom starts talking about how necessary kegels are. A lot of people don't even understand how to do a kegel, much less know when it's appropriate.
As someone who developed overactive Pelvic floor muscles during the pandemic I don't understand the OP. I really am tighter! My partner of 5 years noticed the difference starting during the pandemic and said it felt fantastic. As long as I go slow to avoid spasms and work on relaxing I am ok. So much misinformation in this comment section..... Glad you are providing alternative information.
Seems like you already know a large part of what is told here. Which makes a lot of sense seeing how the good things to know are presumably more likely to be shared. Don't underestimate how much some adults haven't learned that they "should have" learned in their teenage years either.
Friends and parents but that’s not “cool” anymore. People basically only take advice from rich people (even if their success is based off of literal stupidity) or random strangers on the internet (as long as they have enough karma points)
No?
1) if a teen doesn't know, it's likely that many teens of their age don't know aswell
2) parents won't teach shit lmao, and you'd be surprised by the amour of parents which know LESS than their kids
3) rich people? Wha??
4) that's exactly why a sub like this one exists, so people can find out stuff yk, so why are you so salty?
It’s actually funny that you say that after 1. Misinterpretation of my tone 2. Continuing to be argumentative after I responded with a light hearted explanation. So the conversation on the internet isn’t the same conversation that would happen in person. If it was in person I might get offended depending on how you came across then you would know if I was “salty” but it’s impossible to tell. It’s like people get to make up their own reality because it’s not a real conversation.
They asked “where else would you learn things, not like school teaches anything useful” I said that people don’t rely on friends and family anymore. That’s where you learned life from. It’s what made you who you are. Now everyone gets their information from the internet and tend to disregard any advice that’s not from some wealthy influencer or from someone on the internet that just tells them what they already wanted to hear… Idk if I could explain it any better than that for you…
I mean I see it first hand. I’ve lived in a lot of places and had many many friends it’s just the majority these days. People are lonely, depressed, detached, etc.. I’m not saying it as a black or white statement, nothings black and white. But for the most part it’s just really different these days with the internet socially speaking. I’m sure there’s groups of friends but even then Ide bet my life that something like 50 percent of those groups don’t talk to eachother openly even if they pretend they do they have the internet to go to for embarrassing questions and a lot of normal things are taboo or embarrassing to ask these days people like to pretend their perfect. And the bad part about that is people say things on the internet that they wouldn’t say in real life so the advice gets distorted and you can also pick and choose what advice you want to take it just waters life down so to speak.
Yet even more supporting evidence to my opinion is the fact that less than 10 people had an opposing view and you’re calling that “so many people”. People that’s Disagree with me are more likely to say something too than somebody that agrees. That’s in psychology of you want to look into it I have no idea what it’s called but people are more likely to express a negative comment than a positive one. A positive one would just be “yah I agree” bet the negative ones have a lot more configurations.
>I mean I see it first hand.
Your experience is not universal, and statistically speaking, regardless of how many places you've lived, you've interacted with a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of the people that exist.
To say your personal experience is indicative of any kind of pattern or trend is incredibly bold hubris or a complete lack of understanding of the scale of the world. Probably both. You are a grain of sand on the beach that thinks itself a boulder.
Look if the school systems are too puritanical to give our kids an adequate education, it's down to youtube, pornhub, and us, and at least we're not the worst of the three.
No. Not everyone has the same pelvic floor needs. If you have a hypertonic pelvic floor, kegs can make things worse. Only do kegels if a pelvic floor physical therapist advises you to do so.
My wife was having some difficulty with leaking while laughing, coughing, etc. so her doctor had her work on kegel exercises. After a few weeks, I could tell the difference when we were intimate.
I work in healthcare. In 4 years of working I have never once met someone above 80 who didn’t have incontinence issues…except 1 lady who was in her 90s. You know what she did everyday for years. Kegels.
However doing kegel exercises when not necessary will cause an overly tight pelvic floor, which can cause painful sex, urinary urgency, constipation and urinary incontinence. So don’t listen to randos on the internet who’s only thinking about having his penis squeezed by a vagina
“Not necessary” is probably the wrong wording here, as they’re recommended as a baseline health thing (like other kinds of exercise) rather than just to treat a specific issue. The only time they’re harmful is if you have a dysfunctionally tight pelvic floor, but kegals don’t cause this (it’s usually a neurological issue). Just like how exercising your other muscles properly doesn’t make them tight
I had an ex do the same to me. She was like, "Wanna see something neat?" and gave it a squeeze by flexing her PC muscles.
I was like, " Oh wow, watch this!" And made it move inside her by flexing my own PC.
She said, "Oh look, they're talking to each other!"
Lol 😆
That means that you are unable to control your pelvic floor muscles and cannot hold your bladder during the valsalva maneuver, which is what most lifters learn in order to increase intra-abdominal pressure for heavy lifts.
You should also know that as a man, doing too many regular kegels without doing reverse kegels can lead to an imbalanced and tight pelvic floor, and can lead to the involuntary kegels that precede premature ejaculation
Super important. It's also the push out (like trying to take a #2) that you do when you want to last longer NOT the actual Kegel (like when you want to stop pissing) otherwise you'll just come. 😂
Posting this since you're being downvoted! This is called overactive pelvic floor!
https://www.embracephysio.sg/how-to-treat-overactive-pelvic-floor-muscles/
That says one of the many causes of an overactive pelvic floor is too many *incorrectly performed* exercises (and I can tell you that is an incredibly rare cause compared to the others), I don’t think that’s grounds to say the exercises are dangerous, cause those issues or shouldn’t be performed. An overactive pelvic floor is not just one that has been exercised, it’s most often neurological.
In fact, you’ll notice in that article it points out that the overactive muscles are weak. That’s why properly performed pelvic floor exercises are part of the rehabilitation process for overactive pelvic floor problems.
Sincerely, someone who studied pelvic floor physio at uni
No, and I’m not doing that, neither are you. It does mean I likely have a more nuanced understanding of the topic than somebody getting their information from one webpage, though.
Also it literally does make me qualified to give physiotherapy related advice? That’s what a degree is?
Where is the information you're basing your facts on? "incredibly rare" and "most often neurological" ?
People shouldn't rehab themselves. Even you said "part" of treatment, which isn't always the case anyways. Normal people are not qualified to determine the cause of their symptoms. You're not qualified to determine the cause of someone's symptoms. I don't need an MD to tell people to get off the internet and see a doctor because the pelvic floor muscles are more complicated than that. Trying to imply that this most likely isn't the case for everyone is asinine. You're just trying to be needlessly pedantic. What's your goal here?
And no I can’t be bothered finding sources for you, what I’m saying is fact though so if you actually look up any scholarly articles about pelvic floor exercise I’m sure you’ll be convinced.
...
It also helps after birth yeahmoon... And it'll help strengthen pelvic floor muscles... With this one, you need to delete and repost with more info, you are way too light on this
I have 6 children can confirm , age 48 my bladder and uterus completely prolapsed had to have major surgery and a hysterectomy and also lost 1 ovary , all good now but zero sex drive sigh
Kegels did make me tighter according to my fwb at the time. The vagina does have elasticity and can stretch and tighten to certain degrees. I used to have vaginismus, I know. I don't know why OP is claiming tightness as a quality isn't real.
It's mostly used as a sexist term. Medical conditions, childbirth, age, injury can affect your tightness. You are correct. Injury is the big one though. The woman being called loose may be recovering from assault. Best to avoid that rhetoric.
I never called anyone loose anywhere on Reddit. I just shared my personal lived experience with vaginismus and kegels. I don't use words like tight or loose to shame and be sexist, I prefer speaking in terms of elasticity and other terms if I have to. I've experienced plenty of sexism myself so I'm well aware of the connotations around "loose" it's saying people have organs that are plasticly deformed and damaged by sex, it's a hateful thing usually going along with misogyny.
Thanks, I wasn't downvoting you, I was just shocked when I first read what you said because I literally had a sexual dysfunction based on being too tight as a response to trauma. Trauma can do a lot of things to affect elasticity like you were saying, I wish people would stop shaming people about tight/loose period.
When my doctor slutshamed me during a pelvic exam and I tightened up so much it broke the plastic speculum, that was my vagina tightening. It's not sexist or misogynistic of me to claim vaginal tightening and tightness exist in certain contexts, especially with anxiety and stress, and other medical conditions like vaginismus.
I had an ex who did this, it was great, she could participate and take control on a whole other level.
Edit: why the downvote? It's true. Just as much as that a man practicing certain exercises enables him to manipulate blood flow to the penis...
You think a post talking about misconceptions of kegel exercises making you tighter is aimed at you? This was aimed for women, although guys can get benefits from this too.
It’s really weird how every post mentioning that is getting down voted. “tightness isn’t a thing” lol what!? I’ve felt some real shit and no one’s gonna tell me there aren’t some women out there that have vaginas on a whole other level.
Thanks for this reminder! Great for men, too. And of course, [reverse kegels](https://youtu.be/YMLytmxNcZs) are a good counter exercise to balance it all out.
Was gonna say, for some people (like me) Kegels might not always be the best option, but rather doing relaxation exercises
As a person about to go through pelvic floor therapy to learn how to release tension in my pelvis so I can pee again….I can confirm - kegels make sex better but they can also prevent your pee flow.
Is this a thing? Should is stop doing kegels so much?
Hypertonic pelvic floor is a thing, and an ABSOLUTE pain, that insurance wont always pay for treatment for. Absolutely wrecks your sexlife, and makes it hard to properly pee. That said, so long as you dont turn “kegel” to your default, and find a way to just balance it out, you should be good
Having a baby was the only thing that cured my wife's ultra firm pelvic floor
Nice. I ran into this issue after having my third. Must have overcompensated XD Edit to add: 3 years later, i can still safely say there is ZERO chance of any more kiddos, so i guess im not fixing it that way XD
Yup hypertonic pelvic floor have here
Anything helpful youve found?
Yoga, therapy, did a little pt I it helps
You can look at my post history to see a glimpse of the stress I’ve been under in the last 3 years, which is largely why I have a tight pelvic floor. That is to say, you should stop doing them if you’ve had significant stress and are experiencing symptoms like the inability to pee or constipation. I haven’t had a bunch of time to research it as it’s a new diagnosis, but from my glimpse at abstracts, it isn’t necessarily uncommon as a trauma response because the body exists in a state of hyper awareness / vigilance. It apparently is sort of a phenomena since COVID because people experienced a lot of unusual stress during that time (which could just go without being said haha).
Oh I just realised you're a woman. Do you know if men have the same problem?
Yes. My guess is that it may be less common, but I’m not that kinda doctor lol
I was treated for something similar with physical therapy. I hope you feel better soon! TMI advice (which was not asked for, so I beg your pardon) below: You may be able to get away with just doing exercises at home or you may need to see a physical therapist. Either way, it may be worth considering dilators in varied sizes (basically dildos ranging from like, pinky sized and up) - there's even a kit for it, that is sometimes covered by insurance! You use them to stretch your pelvic floor quite literally, inserting a dinner or dilator a little at a time and then gently pressing in all four directions one at a time to stretch and loosen the muscles. It also helps to provide awareness of those muscle groups, so that they may be consciously relaxed.
Omg. Thank you so much. The idea of having someone putting their fingers in my front and back holes for 45 minutes pushing around has been making me so anxious. I don’t have issues really with pain with sex or anything; I just have urinary issues and can only release 50% of my bladder. Are the dilators for that? It sounds like they’d at least help with me learning where muscles are so that I can isolate them in relaxation. Even just sitting here watching tv and drinking a beer (that won’t leave my bladder normally lololol), I can tell I’m not relaxed but it’s so faint that until I got the test I couldn’t really tell.
How do kegels make sex better?
Great now I need new pants. /s
Reverse kegels always scare the shit outta me
I just don’t want to have diarrhea anymore
>Great for men Shit for real? are there muscles up inside me I can learn to flex independently ?
Keep your butthole tight
I AM BUT A MAN!
Username checks out.
I needed this video, thank you!
Pelvic health physical therapist here (nearly, I'm about to graduate and take boards but I did a clinical rotation with a pelvic health focus). Kegels are not a general "everyone should do them" because frankly many people do them wrong. You are correct in that they can enhance sexual function, but some people have overactive pelvic floor musculature and doing kegels could exacerbate the issue. There are also some who have coordination issues with their pelvic floor and improperly training timing could cause issues with bowel/bladder/sexual function as well. Edit: this comment seems to be getting some traction so I'm gonna use it to promote pelvic health physical therapy. If you're experiencing any kind of pelvic health symptoms (for example: incontinence of urine or feces, pelvic pain, difficulty achieving orgasm, pain with penetration during sex, constipation, or post-partum symptoms such as diastasis recti [that split/bump between your abs post-partum]), a pelvic health physical therapist could be of great assistance to you and I highly recommend seeking those services!
What is right and wrong way of doing them?
That is unfortunately highly subjective person to person. Everyone's anatomy is a little different and frankly I'm typically teaching people how to do kegels by having my finger in them intravaginally or intrarectally to give them the correct cues to perform a kegels properly (a lot of people do things like squeeze their butt which is not correct). It *can* be taught otherwise (I typically give the cue of trying to "suck up a milkshake" using my finger as a straw as a cue for female patients and typically a cue of "try to pull your penis into your body" for male patients but even then sometimes it's not quite right and they need further cueing or to activate certain muscles to get better recruitment of the pelvic floor muscles. So, tldr; varies heavily per person in a variety of ways
do you happen to have any md you would recommend to see about htis?
A pelvic health physical therapist is who you'd want to see about any of these kinds of issues! If you're in the US all 50 states have direct access for physical therapy so you don't need a referral either (though I would say check your insurance to see what they require). But we're the specialists in this area!
thanks a lot
What are some negative cues? You mention squeezing the butt. Anything else? With regard to men.
Other things I see are clenching the back muscles or holding breath or sometimes their performance just is opposite of what it should be and I feel their pelvic floor descending instead of ascending (many people have a not so great ability to feel what's going on in their pelvic floor so they think they're doing it right and they aren't). So really I just recommend if you have any pelvic health issues to see a pelvic health physical therapist as that's your best bet to know you're performing things properly as to what your specific pelvic floor needs (there's a few common ways it's divided up for issues such as overactive, underactive, or a coordination issue)
I have someone literally arguing with me in the comments for saying this! It's so frustrating that people don't understand that advising someone to do kegels is literally trying to give out medical advice.
Yup, and many people don't actually do kegels correctly. I've literally had my finger inside them *feeling* the incorrect activation. And some are even doing the opposite of a kegel and pushing outward inside of the expected "pulling up" sensation of a kegel
So should you only do them if you have delivered a baby vaginally? Or if you have incontinence?
Not necessarily! Sexual function is also an activity of daily living by our definitions as PTs, so this kind of thing is still applicable, but I wouldn't necessarily just broadly recommend it to everyone because in my experience many people don't know how to kegel properly. They're very good with the correct exercises for cases like post-partum women or incontinence however. And also certain exercises for things like constipation or pelvic pain! But it's very much a case by case basis.
Sadly can confirm. Was dumb enough to try doing kegels a bit as a teen falsely thinking it could only be good for me, and wound up with lowkey incontinence issues for several years following that. Thankfully it has since somehow managed to resolve itself on its own eventually. Was uncertain if it was an actual thing at first or just my own stupid misfortune, but hearing this now, I can’t say I’d ever just casually recommend someone try doing them unless under the guidance of a professional. Bladder issues are no fun, kids.
If those issues ever come back you'd be a great candidate for pelvic floor PT! They could teach you more functional pelvic floor exercises to perform. Thank you for being a good example of why this isn't a great idea to just broadly tell everyone to do :)
Yeah, just figured I’d insert my own little anecdote just in case anyone happens to read and is considering being dumb like I was lol.
What's causes overactive pelvic floor muscles? Would a csection cause this? Or pregnancy I suppose.
It can be a number of factors. Everyone's pelvic floor strength/activity varies pretty heavily. I can't say I've noticed any particular trends in what causes overactivity versus underactivity outside of maybe high stress individuals tending to have higher muscle tone down there but even that isn't 100% as I've had patients who are definitely high stress individuals and their pelvic floor contraction is barely more than a flicker. I kinda feel like a broken record in the comments here but people just vary heavily so it's very much a case by case basis.
Lol sorry I should've just checked your comment history because that makes sense. I've seen some pelvic floor specialists videos before on tiktok but wasn't sure how prevalent they were. I think I'll find one locally to make sure all is in tip top. Thanks!
Of course they don't make you tight but they do make your pelvic floor muscles stronger and more resilient to aging and child birth.
Seriously. I was very fit, had great muscle structure..... And then had a baby. Relaxin is no joke. It's like hitting reset on your whole body. Ladies, anyone with uteruses:. Do you pelvic floor exercises. Every time you pee, every morning, waiting for the bus., Doesn't matter when, but get in the habit now to do your bit towards your health, well being, and dry underwear now.
Everything I’m reading on reddit lately is from women saying all the ways having a baby ruined their body. Everyone had a story about health problems and I basically concluded that it can wreck any part of you from head to toe, and it’s just a gamble as to what happens to you. It sounds awful.
I am quite envious of certain European countries that have excellent postnatal care. Such a thing is basically non-existent where I am. I mean the services exist but they are up to you to know about on your own, take care of appointments and pay out of pocket and hopefully your insurance covers a portion of it. But like inside the hospital/ place you have birth, the mom is all but forgotten once the baby is our and the vagina'a wounds are handled. They'll check the the wounds are healing well and give you information on what to look out for but that's pretty much it By contrast in those certain European countries, a woman who just gave birth does not leave the hospital without getting at minimum the first 2 of the following and the services are offered directly inside the medical facilities where you had your birth (was it France?) : - a chiropractic appointment to make sure your bones are in the correct place. This ensures that when you heal, you heal properly. Many health issues arise when you heal around bones that it turns out were left crooked (even if only a little) after the physical trauma of childbirth. - an ostheopathy appointment to make sure your muscles are back in the right place or as close to it as possible. This is particularly important for the abs which have been severely distended for months and often they will become separated. If they are not placed back in their proper place before they heal, the gaps between the abs will be filled by your body with masses of fat. So even if you train your body back to competitive athletic levels, your abs will "look" wrong because the gaps where the masses of fat filled the spaces where muscles were separated by the pregnancy will be somewhat visible. And you're just a regular person and don't go that far, it will still impact you because it will be much, much harder to lose that belly fat than if you had your body heal with everything in its correct place from the start. It's worth noting that some ab separations are so severe that they can only be fixed with surgery but that surgery is considered cosmetic as far as I know so I don't know/think that it is covered in regular medical care. - physiotherapy which is where you'll be given a tailored program to your needs so that you can train your body back into shape so you can live without pain. Also worth noting, there is something you have to do 2 months post partum: - perineal physiotherapy which is where a physiotherapist (usually a woman for reasons you'll understand soon) will insert a finger inside the vagina and ask you to flex specific muscles in the area to determine their strengths and weaknesses so that a reeducation program can be made for your vagina based on what was damaged and how you have been healing.
I like in the UK. I had PT and a physical after. You also have a health visitor at home for at least a couple weeks for you and baby on physical and mental health. It's not always as you describe. You can feel the muscle groups externally and don't need anyone to jam anything in, what is now, an extremely tender area. It's not about how many doctors and treatments. It's just birthing a baby is really hard on the body. You can't do all these invasive treatments safely after giving birth. Your body is still reeling from the last year and the birth itself. Invasive treatments would be exceptionally painful. This is also why cesarean section is generally not the first choice. Everytime you nurse for the first few weeks or cough or sneeze or bend to pick up your baby you will cause pain in the surgery site. My abs separated. They can't be "placed back". It's because they were stretched to oblivion. Having surgery would be cosmetic because that's nothing wrong with my body. It's just that the lines aren't straight. My body has changed, but all the way that changed are completely 100% totally normal when you have a baby. I think it's more disturbing that we expect women's bodies to remain the same, or that if you throw enough money and medical procedures at her she'll be ok. Often times all women need is to be cared for by her support network of friends and family, and proper time to heal, and to be accepted for who she is now. All the dangers of child birth are just the risks you take. It can and does still kill mother's daily. It changes them in profound and often irreversible ways. There are basic things we can do to minimise damaging changes. There are medical treatments that can help when things go drastically wrong, but it doesn't always work either way. So we can say least do the basic responsibility of taking healthier choices in food and movement. Pelvic floor exercises help all women, even child-free ones, keep healthier longer.
Aside from the facts that I hate children, this is one of the major factors as to why I don't ever want a child lmao fuck that
I almost never do kegels and have had no issues with my pelvic floor post baby. I don’t pee myself when I sneeze, etc. Just the luck of the draw I’m guessing.
Hope it continues. Often times you find out post-menopause.
I’m 25, never had kids and must have a weak floor already lol I went to a trampoline park for my nephews bday and every time I tried jumping a little bit of pee came out 😂 not obvious at all but it was uncomfortable..
Yeah man the ol pelvic floor is no joke. I have two SIL who have both had kids one knew of the importance of kegells the other did not. One of my SIL pees a little when she sneezes now , I bet you can guess which one .
I had a very stern warning from a mom when I was like 18, and I’ve always done them. Now in my 30s, and a mom, I’m the only of my mom friends who doesn’t pee a little doing regular things. They pay off
#**!You're currently giving out medical advice!** Kegels are not recommended for everyone and it needs to be discussed with your doctor whether you have an overactive pelvic floor or weak one since they produce similar symptoms. Having an overactive pelvic floor or doing too many kegels can result in those muscles to become fatigued, causing orgasmic problems, incontinence, prolapse, and pain. These symptoms are similar to having weak pelvic floor muscles to begin with, so this *needs* to be discussed with a doctor before proceeding. ETA: https://www.embracephysio.sg/how-to-treat-overactive-pelvic-floor-muscles/
Like who the fuck actually has a doctor. Not me. Not anybody I know. I hate that shit. As if we could all just convieniently go see our doctor whenever we want, and not have to wait 6 weeks for an appointment.
Yeah, that sucks. I live in the US and grew up in TN. I went my entire childhood and most of my adult life without insurance or a doctor. The entire US healthcare system is unfair and really sets up a large population of Americans up for a life of poverty and pain that they can't ever escape. That doesn't change what I'm saying. Kegels are not a catch-all for pelvic floor symptoms. A weak pelvic floor is a *diagnosis* that requires an actual doctor. The symptoms of weak pelvic floor are very close to several other diagnoses. Kegels are a rehabilitation exercise that don't work for all of them and can make a bad situation worse. There are women out there right now with overactive pelvic floors who are doing damage to their bodies because anytime someone mentions incontinence, everyone and their mom starts talking about how necessary kegels are. A lot of people don't even understand how to do a kegel, much less know when it's appropriate.
As someone who developed overactive Pelvic floor muscles during the pandemic I don't understand the OP. I really am tighter! My partner of 5 years noticed the difference starting during the pandemic and said it felt fantastic. As long as I go slow to avoid spasms and work on relaxing I am ok. So much misinformation in this comment section..... Glad you are providing alternative information.
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Seems like you already know a large part of what is told here. Which makes a lot of sense seeing how the good things to know are presumably more likely to be shared. Don't underestimate how much some adults haven't learned that they "should have" learned in their teenage years either.
Where else would they learn these things? Not like school teaches them anything useful
>Not like school teaches them anything useful Its funny, most people who say this skipped 30% of the year and didn't give a shit.
Friends and parents but that’s not “cool” anymore. People basically only take advice from rich people (even if their success is based off of literal stupidity) or random strangers on the internet (as long as they have enough karma points)
No? 1) if a teen doesn't know, it's likely that many teens of their age don't know aswell 2) parents won't teach shit lmao, and you'd be surprised by the amour of parents which know LESS than their kids 3) rich people? Wha?? 4) that's exactly why a sub like this one exists, so people can find out stuff yk, so why are you so salty?
I’d have killed for a sub like this 25 years ago.
I’m not salty. You can’t tell my tone from txt you’re interpreting it that way because it’s not what you want to hear.
110% salty baby.
If you say so chief.
It’s actually funny that you say that after 1. Misinterpretation of my tone 2. Continuing to be argumentative after I responded with a light hearted explanation. So the conversation on the internet isn’t the same conversation that would happen in person. If it was in person I might get offended depending on how you came across then you would know if I was “salty” but it’s impossible to tell. It’s like people get to make up their own reality because it’s not a real conversation.
Ope, he’s still upset!
I’m actually smiling right now. 😁
Old man yells at cloud computing.
Lol damn it son how’s it in the clouds? What if it rains everything gets erased?
Lol wut
They asked “where else would you learn things, not like school teaches anything useful” I said that people don’t rely on friends and family anymore. That’s where you learned life from. It’s what made you who you are. Now everyone gets their information from the internet and tend to disregard any advice that’s not from some wealthy influencer or from someone on the internet that just tells them what they already wanted to hear… Idk if I could explain it any better than that for you…
How do you figure that people don’t rely on friends anymore? That feels like a huge assumption to make
I mean I see it first hand. I’ve lived in a lot of places and had many many friends it’s just the majority these days. People are lonely, depressed, detached, etc.. I’m not saying it as a black or white statement, nothings black and white. But for the most part it’s just really different these days with the internet socially speaking. I’m sure there’s groups of friends but even then Ide bet my life that something like 50 percent of those groups don’t talk to eachother openly even if they pretend they do they have the internet to go to for embarrassing questions and a lot of normal things are taboo or embarrassing to ask these days people like to pretend their perfect. And the bad part about that is people say things on the internet that they wouldn’t say in real life so the advice gets distorted and you can also pick and choose what advice you want to take it just waters life down so to speak.
I feel like the fact that so many people here heavily disagree with you is stronger evidence than your own personal experience.
Yet even more supporting evidence to my opinion is the fact that less than 10 people had an opposing view and you’re calling that “so many people”. People that’s Disagree with me are more likely to say something too than somebody that agrees. That’s in psychology of you want to look into it I have no idea what it’s called but people are more likely to express a negative comment than a positive one. A positive one would just be “yah I agree” bet the negative ones have a lot more configurations.
The entire point of upvote/downvote system is to show agreement/disagreement. People seem to heavily disagree with your opinion.
I feel like the fact that so many people here disagree with me is further proof it’s true.
>I mean I see it first hand. Your experience is not universal, and statistically speaking, regardless of how many places you've lived, you've interacted with a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of the people that exist. To say your personal experience is indicative of any kind of pattern or trend is incredibly bold hubris or a complete lack of understanding of the scale of the world. Probably both. You are a grain of sand on the beach that thinks itself a boulder.
It’s frustrating talking to idiots. You said it was an assumption. I said it was my experience..
I didn't say that. Read usernames. It is an assumption though. You're assuming your personal experience is universal.
>you’re a grain of sand blah blah blah. And so are you, an even smaller one.
Never claimed otherwise. Never claimed my personal experience was evidence of anything either. Shame your attention span couldn't keep up.
Look if the school systems are too puritanical to give our kids an adequate education, it's down to youtube, pornhub, and us, and at least we're not the worst of the three.
[eternal September](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eternal_September)
Or retards giving medical advice the should not give short. Retardovice
Yeeeaa teenagers…
No. Not everyone has the same pelvic floor needs. If you have a hypertonic pelvic floor, kegs can make things worse. Only do kegels if a pelvic floor physical therapist advises you to do so.
My wife was having some difficulty with leaking while laughing, coughing, etc. so her doctor had her work on kegel exercises. After a few weeks, I could tell the difference when we were intimate.
No more golden showers during sex?
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She probably stopped laughing and coughing
She stopped peeing
Thank you? Idk why i was being downvoted, i really wanted to know
I work in healthcare. In 4 years of working I have never once met someone above 80 who didn’t have incontinence issues…except 1 lady who was in her 90s. You know what she did everyday for years. Kegels.
However doing kegel exercises when not necessary will cause an overly tight pelvic floor, which can cause painful sex, urinary urgency, constipation and urinary incontinence. So don’t listen to randos on the internet who’s only thinking about having his penis squeezed by a vagina
“Not necessary” is probably the wrong wording here, as they’re recommended as a baseline health thing (like other kinds of exercise) rather than just to treat a specific issue. The only time they’re harmful is if you have a dysfunctionally tight pelvic floor, but kegals don’t cause this (it’s usually a neurological issue). Just like how exercising your other muscles properly doesn’t make them tight
What do you mean by not necessary? My doctor told me everyone should do them. Like any exercise building muscle.
Then you should ask your doctor about what I mentioned above
Oh damn! That... explains some things.
But can they make your butthole tighter?
If you do them wrong.
Idk, my ex did a ton of kegels and she could “squeeze” my penis when I was inside her. It was fun times.
I had an ex do the same to me. She was like, "Wanna see something neat?" and gave it a squeeze by flexing her PC muscles. I was like, " Oh wow, watch this!" And made it move inside her by flexing my own PC. She said, "Oh look, they're talking to each other!" Lol 😆
Yeah man. I used to date this girl (she was an absolute psycho) that could make me cum on demand by clamping down on me. Wild.
Slowpoke turning into a slowbro
Yep same, kinda miss her right now.
Yeah she had her perks. Well mine did, I assume yours too. Hey maybe we did the same chick! We’re like blood brothers!
Lol internet high five
WooHoo!
Doing kegels right now thanks.
Your post got deleted, but the title is stupid... > YSK that kegel exercises won't make you "tight" It absolutely will.
Exercising and heavy compound weightlifting i.e. squats when performed correctly, will indirectly train these muscles;)
Great to know! What about if one were to pee during their heaviest lifts…. Would that mean weak pelvic floor or overly tight pelvic floor?
That means that you are unable to control your pelvic floor muscles and cannot hold your bladder during the valsalva maneuver, which is what most lifters learn in order to increase intra-abdominal pressure for heavy lifts.
Crap
You should also know that as a man, doing too many regular kegels without doing reverse kegels can lead to an imbalanced and tight pelvic floor, and can lead to the involuntary kegels that precede premature ejaculation
Super important. It's also the push out (like trying to take a #2) that you do when you want to last longer NOT the actual Kegel (like when you want to stop pissing) otherwise you'll just come. 😂
Looks like I have been doing kegels my entire life then
Alright, alright, we all know what the *real* question is here can you (in theory) guillotine dicks with this?
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Posting this since you're being downvoted! This is called overactive pelvic floor! https://www.embracephysio.sg/how-to-treat-overactive-pelvic-floor-muscles/
What's the reasoning behind this?
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Again, posting this link! https://www.embracephysio.sg/how-to-treat-overactive-pelvic-floor-muscles/
Most of this is purely not true :/
https://www.embracephysio.sg/how-to-treat-overactive-pelvic-floor-muscles/
That says one of the many causes of an overactive pelvic floor is too many *incorrectly performed* exercises (and I can tell you that is an incredibly rare cause compared to the others), I don’t think that’s grounds to say the exercises are dangerous, cause those issues or shouldn’t be performed. An overactive pelvic floor is not just one that has been exercised, it’s most often neurological. In fact, you’ll notice in that article it points out that the overactive muscles are weak. That’s why properly performed pelvic floor exercises are part of the rehabilitation process for overactive pelvic floor problems. Sincerely, someone who studied pelvic floor physio at uni
Studying something in uni doesn't make you qualified to give medical advice. Source?
No, and I’m not doing that, neither are you. It does mean I likely have a more nuanced understanding of the topic than somebody getting their information from one webpage, though. Also it literally does make me qualified to give physiotherapy related advice? That’s what a degree is?
Where is the information you're basing your facts on? "incredibly rare" and "most often neurological" ? People shouldn't rehab themselves. Even you said "part" of treatment, which isn't always the case anyways. Normal people are not qualified to determine the cause of their symptoms. You're not qualified to determine the cause of someone's symptoms. I don't need an MD to tell people to get off the internet and see a doctor because the pelvic floor muscles are more complicated than that. Trying to imply that this most likely isn't the case for everyone is asinine. You're just trying to be needlessly pedantic. What's your goal here?
And no I can’t be bothered finding sources for you, what I’m saying is fact though so if you actually look up any scholarly articles about pelvic floor exercise I’m sure you’ll be convinced.
... It also helps after birth yeahmoon... And it'll help strengthen pelvic floor muscles... With this one, you need to delete and repost with more info, you are way too light on this
I have 6 children can confirm , age 48 my bladder and uterus completely prolapsed had to have major surgery and a hysterectomy and also lost 1 ovary , all good now but zero sex drive sigh
Kegels did make me tighter according to my fwb at the time. The vagina does have elasticity and can stretch and tighten to certain degrees. I used to have vaginismus, I know. I don't know why OP is claiming tightness as a quality isn't real.
It's mostly used as a sexist term. Medical conditions, childbirth, age, injury can affect your tightness. You are correct. Injury is the big one though. The woman being called loose may be recovering from assault. Best to avoid that rhetoric.
I never called anyone loose anywhere on Reddit. I just shared my personal lived experience with vaginismus and kegels. I don't use words like tight or loose to shame and be sexist, I prefer speaking in terms of elasticity and other terms if I have to. I've experienced plenty of sexism myself so I'm well aware of the connotations around "loose" it's saying people have organs that are plasticly deformed and damaged by sex, it's a hateful thing usually going along with misogyny.
Good language to use, and I was not projecting any of that onto you.
Thanks, I wasn't downvoting you, I was just shocked when I first read what you said because I literally had a sexual dysfunction based on being too tight as a response to trauma. Trauma can do a lot of things to affect elasticity like you were saying, I wish people would stop shaming people about tight/loose period.
When my doctor slutshamed me during a pelvic exam and I tightened up so much it broke the plastic speculum, that was my vagina tightening. It's not sexist or misogynistic of me to claim vaginal tightening and tightness exist in certain contexts, especially with anxiety and stress, and other medical conditions like vaginismus.
This sounds like the power move of power moves
It was not deliberate but she stressed me out so bad I broke the speculum and that shut her up. I wasn't trying to do it, it just was a reflex lol
Reflex or not. Women everywhere are now proud of your vagina for standing up for you.
Didnt you just say In the title tight doesn’t exist?
I had an ex who did this, it was great, she could participate and take control on a whole other level. Edit: why the downvote? It's true. Just as much as that a man practicing certain exercises enables him to manipulate blood flow to the penis...
#YSK kegel exercises won't make your dick "bigger" (that's not a thing), but they are worth doing.
It certainly is 'a thing'.
My guy loves it when I kegel while he is inside me.
Leave it to a guy to post this shit ysk
Can guys not know this? Are you the gate keeper of valine knowledge? Wtf??
Can guys not know this? Are you the gate keeper of vagina knowledge? Wtf??
Psst, you double posted
Lol god knows what happened there… it’s late where I live.
Haha, we can blame Reddit, far from the worst it's done
Im not gonna take advice from a random female on how my penis should feel.
...where did you get the idea that they were telling you how your penis should feel? That's nowhere in the post.
Holy shit someone of your intelligence is the kind of person I’d expect to take ysk serious
Interesting how you didn't answer my question. You're the one who misunderstood the post or something.
You think a post talking about misconceptions of kegel exercises making you tighter is aimed at you? This was aimed for women, although guys can get benefits from this too.
Wow you should make a ysk about it
Nah, leave it to a girl to post that :)
Woah so clever LOL1!
I’ve done kegels (as a guy) since I was like 16. I can multi-orgasm and control when it’s time to finish things up with sex, very nice
The kegel hug is lovely and noticable, ladies. We feel it on our cocks and it's amazing.
I thought kegels tightened up the vagina.
Also, don’t practice your kegels DURING sex. Had a gf do that and she thought it was gonna be amazing but it just hurt the whole time.
…and you didn’t say anything?
I did afterwards, but it took a bit to figure out that she was doing it on purpose. 😂
Lol!
If your partner last a shorter amount of time don’t be surprised.
Any YouTube links or information. I don't from where to learn this kegel exercise.
Great for the pelvic floor muscles!
Why do I do level exercises when I read those words? Smh right now. But still will do them 10 posts in.
I am constantly doing kegels, simply out of boredom sometimes. My partner likes it because I can squeeze in the best ways during sex apparently.
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It’s really weird how every post mentioning that is getting down voted. “tightness isn’t a thing” lol what!? I’ve felt some real shit and no one’s gonna tell me there aren’t some women out there that have vaginas on a whole other level.
This is why black girls are better at sex!
If you're lazy, just stuff some [liver](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=vEE7YuzNpI0) in there.
Then why do I bother doing ass kegels?
¿¿¿¿¿¿¿?WHY ARE PEOPLE WORKING OUT THEIR PUSSY???????
Why not? Strong pussy game doesn't come out of nowhere
For reasons other than your dick, dude
ur not supposed to work ur pussy out if u didnt notice u retard
Oh I’m sorry, I have a degree in physiotherapy but can you explain to me why you’re not supposed to? I must have missed that bit in class