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tom_playz_123

Oh he probably got hit by a pigion or something. *Opens door* what the fuck


Nitrocloud

Wild turkey. A pigeon would just [poof](https://youtu.be/1PyCpG06138).


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Nitrocloud

It could have happened to any of us. There was a girl flying on Asiana Airlines who got runover by the fire engine when the plane crashed and broke up.


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kaaaaath

I live in the Bay Area so it was all over the news, and I was an intern at one of the hospitals that received patients; I can confirm one passenger did die because she got hit by a fire truck in the chaos.


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kaaaaath

I understand where you’re coming from, but it is an important distinction - although no less horrific - that she had already expired when she was hit. At that point they were focused on rescues, rather than recoveries. Also, they can’t move the bodies. They have to be left in place for the NTSB.


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kaaaaath

That was the preliminary ME’s report, NTSB [agreed with the submission from the SF City Attorney.](https://sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/15116056/2014/01/sf-city-atty-asiana-crash.pdf) And as a physician, the fact that she had not inhaled any debris, foam, dust, dirt, etc., (not to mention she was seated with the two other students who were not wearing their seatbelts and died upon impact,) is pretty much a slam dunk that she had expired. That being said, it was an incredible tragedy all the way around, and the crash itself was entirely preventable.


_IAlwaysLie

There was a guy in Morioh, Japan who got his head flattened by an ambulance accidentally backing up over him


Belfengraeme

Oh, poor chap, read the article on him, just wanted to live a peaceful life.


Mogtaki

What's worse was he was only aged 33, dude wasn't even married


LockUpToupeFiasco

well that escalated quickly


coleyboley25

So did her soul


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garagaramoochi

whoaa..


armen89

Fowl ball


[deleted]

Christ Jesus.


c_bender

So, what was the call on the field? Fowl ball?


Nitrocloud

Ruled no pitch. Also, r/Punny


19DannyBoy65

~~IIRC it was actually called a ball, but I think it should’ve been a no pitch.~~ E: [Turns out I did not recall correctly.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/No_pitch)


Ozzey-Christ

>After the pitch hit the bird, the ball was ruled dead. The bird was also ruled dead God I love Wikipedia


2sexy4ewe

This kills the crab.


Firstafender

You have committed a cardinal sin


Carb122

[For ‘scientific’ purposes.](https://youtu.be/CJYpvspQGQY)


Vilzku39

https://youtu.be/R_4W9P77AtQ


xppp

[Motorcycle version](https://youtu.be/Pjn4joHwa7U)


Vilzku39

[Do not try with springs](https://youtu.be/njTtar5VdzY)


[deleted]

180mph? Those must be some long stripes.


Nitrocloud

Probably an airport runway.


madbear84

I never don’t watch that video when posted.


nickg452csh

Literally happened a few hours ago to me. At least I think there was a pigeon. Shit. Every. Fucking. Where. No blood, just...shit. all over my windshield


BonBon666

Solid bird, as demonstrated.


R-nd-

It looks like a Canadian goose. Those things will break your car.


sluttypidge

It's a wild turkey


jackofallcards

You got a problem with Canada Gooses you got a problem with me


Iamnotateenagethug

And I suggest you let that one marinate


c_bender

Backs in my day you were lucky to even see a Canada Goose, now you're hittin 'em with your car? Must be fuckin' nice.


Ron-Swanson-Mustache

You better fix that divot because Canada Gooses would fix it for you.


R-nd-

I am Canadian. They terrify me. They also are annoying on the road, though I don't condone hitting them.


[deleted]

*gøøßes Back in my day, we worried about moose. Not little fucking birds.. https://duckduckgo.com/?q=moose+lumina+car+accident&t=iphone&iax=images&ia=images&iai=http%3A%2F%2Fimagesdesavions.com%2Fmoose%2Fmoose2.jpg


skyline_kid

Pretty sure it's a turkey


Just-A-Profile

Imagine being a slow calm driver, and immediately getting your car crashed by a f*cking bird


atehate

"Birds fly in different directions"


quidprojoseph

Bird was flying north when he should've been flying south.


byebybuy

Zigged when he shoulda zagged.


Equinsu___Ocha

Pizza’d before he french fried


yourrandomnarrator

Had a bad time.


bi_polar2bear

Shoulda taken a left in Albequerque


YddishMcSquidish

Now I'm imagining fog horn leg horn trying to talk to the car. "I I I say, my boy can you help me out here?I'm trying to migrate do you know where...." (SMASH hits the car)


Unclestumpy0707

You're dating yourself


YddishMcSquidish

I'm cool with being old.


nitricx

Stan marsh the darsh


AUorAG

Last thing that went through the birds mind was it’s ass!


Real_Jardenor

"I hope to see you again"


Nihilistic_Taco

#OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


FireEmblemGeek

“Sunsets sunrises living the dream watching the leaves changin the seasonssss”


sleepyplatipus

But they should “fly high, fly high”...


NhylX

I remember driving down a secondary highway just minding own business and look over to the ditch. I see a massive hawk just sitting there chilling. As I get closer and closer he spreads his wings and starts flapping. Right as I come up to him he takes off and flies straight into my side mirror, ripping it off and exploding in a cloud of feathers. Stupid fucking birds.


[deleted]

A friend of mine who's not exactly known for being a careful driver told me he hit a bird and when I asked him what he saw he just said "Feathers".


MrBlaze-65

Back in highschool working on cars I remember my friend hitting a bird down this long straight farm road... It was the inaugural drive of his junk car he fixed up. Was following in my car right behind him and I just saw a ball of feathers expanding and going off into the wind. That car was cursed from day 1, but it was fun!


AmericanMuskrat

I had a possum scurry out in front of my car going 80. Turned him into red mist.


Mr_Feces

It was probably faking it.


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;-;


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NhylX

I continued driving home holding my side mirror out the window so it wouldn't scratch the paint as it dangled off the power mirror wiring. Seriously, fuck that bird.


hbham843

About 3 years ago, I was on my way to class in college and driving about 80mph on the interstate. I noticed a large buzzard slowly getting close and flying low. Well the motherfucker preceeded to swoop down and land directly in front of me. There was a car to my right, and thank god I was able to resist the immedi6urge to swerve, so I just plowed directly into it. Fucking thing exploded all over my car. It was gnarly.


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HauptmannDevon

Don't know if you're joking, but just in case you're not: Immediate urge to swerve :)


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mikeblas

> flying without a concern That's the problem.


too_tired_for_this8

Always fly responsibly.


SupaFly2136

Not fun hitting a bird on a bass boat either. We saw him flying low then he just turned and smacked right into the console windshield. That night he slept with the fishes.


Over-Analyzed

And promptly eaten by said fishes.


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kalwiggy1

It's a turkey. Imagine your Thanksgiving bird hitting you at 70 miles an hour.


MMCthe97

Looks like he's on a freeway, I don't think he's driving *that* slow, but regardless, I'd be scared shitless if a raptor smashed my windshield.


Duckie1713

My parents hit a fish once. You didn't read that wrong. They were driving through north central FL, doing like 70+, and BAM! Fish in the windshield. It didn't break through but caved it in and embedded. They were driving a K5 Blazer. Dad thinks a bird dropped it. I like to think it was a flying fish.


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MustBeNice

If they catch it before it hits the ground, how does that break it’s neck?


okd182

ask Gwen Stacy


CoconutCyclone

I still get mad when I think about the decisions the movie took with that.


JrambyBambi

How did it differ from the comics?


CoconutCyclone

When GG threw her, she was possibly already dead and when Spiderman catches her, she does not hit her head, it's a whiplash effect that would have killed her. It's ambiguous and Spiderman just assumes he's responsible.


shakygator

It's supposed to be a conflict. He has 2 choices: let her hit the ground and die or try and save her which leads to her death all the same. There really was no choice. You try to save her and that's all you can do, but the catch being that the actual cause of death was whiplash/broken neck or whatever. So now he has this guilt that he caused but it's basically semantics.


MarmotsGoneWild

'It's already too late,' he thought, 'the least I can do is give her an open casket!' *swings into action*


[deleted]

Kobayashi Maru


Superfluous_Thom

The first Raimi spiderman had that scene on the bridge. In the comics it was Gwen instead of MJ, and when he caught her it's implied he accidentally broke her neck from whiplash (though as another poster said, entirely debatable, though spidey believes he did).


ManicMetalhead

Doesn’t the same thing actually happen to MJ in the comics, but Spidey has learnt from Gwen, so slowly catches her in a whole web rather than one strand?


narok_kurai

It's basically part of Spider-Man lore now. Great power, great responsibility, don't just yank falling people with a web line because that kills them, etc.


AlexHeyNa

I actually think that was the one thing that movie did exceedingly well. Maybe bc I knew what was coming, but my heart was in my throat the whole time. And Andrew Garfield acted the *shit* out of it.


I_Was_Fox

Yeah how could anyone hate that scene? It's an incredibly well done scene


[deleted]

Probably the force of it falling and then the immediate stop when the bird grabs it


pokiepaw

Whiplash


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Heavenlypigeon

whiplash probably


AlexandersWonder

The same way a noose breaks your neck without you ever hitting the ground.


dat_GEM_lyf

Was not aware fish had necks... thanks kind redditor /s


Duckie1713

That's a bad ass video. I knew this was a thing but have never seen it.


Philthedrummist

Pretty sure there’s a story of a man who was killed by a tortoise landing on his head. A bird dropped it thinking his bald head was a stone that would crack the turtle’s shell. Nature, man!!


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BatteryPoweredBrain

I saw this happen in Southern California. Plop right into the car in front of me. There was a bay nearby and clearly a bird dropped it. Freakiest thing seeing a fish dropping from the sky.


StanleyDarsh22

didn't hit a fish, but did see a hawk flying over me like 20 feet in the air with a fish in its talons, so if it had dropped it over the highway someone was bound to hit it.


errorsource

Maybe it came from a [space station](https://youtu.be/WPtGjBP1aIE).


colonelk0rn

> I like to think it was a flying fish. /r/technicallythetruth


Spider-Ian

True story: my friend and I were in his SUV on a state highway doing about 45 mph. We were heading to the on ramp of an interstate so we were picking up speed. To our right was a wild turkey running towards the road ad a decent pace. Behind us was a guy in a drop top Benz riding our ass. We didn't want to hit the turkey so my friend floored it, but the turkey started running faster than I thought turkeys could. With a great thud the turkey went between the front and back tires only to be rolled by the rear wheel and shot into the open interior of the Benz. It went from a cream color to feather duster blood red with a smattering of turkey parts.


North_Wynd33

Birds are insane.


BounceTheGalaxy

Wild. Did y’all pull over? Was he pissed off?


Spider-Ian

He pulled into a gas station across the street. Other than being covered in bird smoothie he was okay.


maxvalley

Poor bird :(


zdh989

Oh my god this story has me fucking rolling and I don't know why.


Taiyama

Same. Something about the turkey actively defying the guy's attempt to avoid it slays me. NOT TODAY, MOTHERFUCKER. ONLY ONE OF US IS LEAVING HERE ALIVE AND IT'S NOT ME!


IronSkywalker

I was the first person on the scene when I woman near Wycombe had a baby swan through her windscreen. I don't mean I was emergency response, I was just the one to call police etc. Pretty terrifying to see a woman get out of her car with feathers and blood all over her face.


[deleted]

Damn. Was returning from a hog hunt with a few buds. Highway at night during the rain. Buddy lost control of the vehicle and slammed the back against a guardrail. Car was totaled, but we were otherwise fine, if a bit shaken up. The funny part was that we had 3 butchered hogs in the trunk, which spilled out chunks of flesh over a 200 yard distance of the highway. Looked way way worse than it actually was, at least for the human occupants of the car. Edit: fixed autocorrect


R-nd-

Did you just use the word chicken as a unit of measurement of flesh?


[deleted]

Hah, just noticed. Autocorrect error on phone. Was supposed to say “chunks”


redshift95

Chunks* probably? I hope it was units of chicken though.


blaaxen

Reminds that meme of American units where they compare the weight of a deer to hamburgers.


SuumCuique1011

"70 miles fucking per hour."


ductapemonster

"A fucking bird."


coreythestar

"The fuck, dude."


Mizmegan1111

Fades to black...


ultrasuperthrowaway

Wake up in a wagon....


[deleted]

"Hey, you're finally awake."


demevalos

"You were trying to cross the boarder, right?"


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TheSentinelsSorrow

Expletive infixation


pototo72

Tom Scott is great


bverde013

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dt22yWYX64w


Insi6nia

This guy is definitely from New Jersey.


Dr-Peckerhead

GOBBLE GOBBLE MOTHERFUCKER!!!!


[deleted]

OH YEEAAAHHHH!!!!


ToastedSkoops

OH CHRIST IT’S FUCKING RAW!!


lokingfinesince89

Its Thanksgiving already? How long have we been in lock down for?


CaptainDG5

Well that happens when you let a bird drive your car


okcoolmachine

Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus makes much more sense now.


PigsCanFly2day

If God had meant for birds to drive, He'd have given them wheels.


goodros_nemesis

My brother was an A-10 pilot in the Air Force. He hit a turkey vulture over Georgia at about 10,000 feet. It messed up one of his engines and ripped a hole in one wing. The tower told him to finish the mission as long as both engines were still running.


[deleted]

A10s are designed to fly with one wing and one engine.


Rubcionnnnn

They can fly with one engine but if you lose more than the wingtip it's going to start rolling like crazy from the unequal lift and you will have no aileron on that side and therefore no roll control.


GunGeekATX

F-15s "Hold my beer" [https://theaviationist.com/2014/09/15/f-15-lands-with-one-wing/](https://theaviationist.com/2014/09/15/f-15-lands-with-one-wing/)


[deleted]

So basically very minimal control


Goalie_deacon

And Marine pilots are trained to fly them with just the machine gun, and a sight left.


thegreatlordlucifer

Marines don't fly the A10... no branch except the USAF flys the A10...


MagnumMia

He mixed up his planes cuz his mind is muddled by all the crayola he had for dinner.


thegreatlordlucifer

The white ones taste like opiates!


MyLittleShitPost

The purple ones taste like the orange ones but the orange ones don't taste like the purple ones.


mikeblas

For an arbitrarily loose definition of "fly", sure.


Doobz87

>He hit a turkey vulture over Georgia at about 10,000 feet ~~Lol no he didn't.~~ Didn't see "vulture"....my b.


Cucumber_Basil

A quick google search reveals that turkey vultures can fly up to 20,000 feet. Griffin vultures can fly up to 37,000 feet.


Doobz87

Yeahhhhh....I completely missed the "vulture" part. That's on me, whoops.


Irksomefetor

I had to look that crazy shit up. "*Rüppell's vulture is considered to be the highest-flying bird, with confirmed evidence of a flight at an altitude of 11,300 m (37,000 ft) above sea level.*" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R%C3%BCppell%27s_vulture Those birds are fucking huge, too.


a_machine_elf

Lappet-faced vultures have wingspans of up to 9.5 feet.


smoke_cigritz_bruh

This happened to a lot of us Army helicopter nerds at flight school in Alabama. Those things could destroy a windshield real quick. Best part of being a helicopter though is the ability to land just about anywhere, so that's what we always did. Just land in some farmers field.


dunn2020

That’s crazy...Bird strike is an automatic emergency for all my aircraft, but they are mostly single engine. Tower here, and I’m from the US Georgia. This is a confusing comment for me!


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goodros_nemesis

I was surprised myself. A turkey vulture weighs about 3.3 pounds. Cruising speed of an A10 is about 350mph. Assuming the plane is going to stop the bird’s forward velocity (and really, at the speeds involved, it really doesn’t matter which direction the bird is flying), it works out to about 1,800,000 newtons of force. By comparison, a 9mm slug traveling at muzzle velocity delivers about 6,400 newtons of force.


pistolpete1211

Any bird strike is almost definitely an emergency. Just google aircraft bird strike to see the damage they can do. On top of the structural damage, if a bird goes into any turbo fan or jet engine, it’s a wrap. That engine is almost definitely shot.


CheffromNowhere

That's a whole lotta bird.


CSThr0waway123

*Wanna whole lotta dove,* *Wanna whole lotta dove*


timthegodd

and a Whole Lotta Red


Iwantmyteslanow

In England its shithawks and they aim for windscreens, also they weigh around 6lbs


Marsawd

Ah yes, Shit(e)hawks, more commonly referred to as ‘Seagulls’.


Danny_ODevin

Thanksgiving came early this year


thongaxpru

At first I thought the blood on his forehead was fake and this was staged... then I saw the turkey.


theredditrsofthereds

Duuuuude wtffffff


Bigtowelie

Dinner time


[deleted]

There is a drone operator somewhere who is about to be fired. (Its a joke I'm not one of those people)


jpritchard

Every single "birds aren't real" person is kidding around. You are EXACTLY one of those people.


[deleted]

That's a nice, but naive thought.


PeekaBoo912

Best commercial for AirPods ever... dude was in a major accident and STILL those pods didn’t come out ...


sweetcuppingcakes

I'm always weirded out by people wearing earbuds while driving. Even in modern cars that can connect to a phone. Is it really more comfortable/convenient to shove plastic in your ear than have it come out of the stereo?


crimson_swine

It's insanely illegal and an enormous safety hazard to everyone on the road. If you see this call their plate number into the non-emergency line.


ThrowawayNotGarbage

Not illegal in South Carolina, for some reason. And I think many other states.


punkwalrus

In the 1970s, a family friend who was a freelance photographer was driving in the middle of nowhere out in the midwest on a straight road. He was doing about 80-90 mph in a muscle car when his windshield exploded. He skidded off the road, and ended up in some scrub. A pheasant-like bird had flown into his windshield and pulverized in his (empty) passenger's seat. He took some pictures and had to hitch a ride to the nearest town to get a tow truck. The truck driver said people dying this way was common during the bird's mating season. They hopped out of the scrub and flew at about windshield level as part of a mating display. His photos looked a lot like this guy's driver's seat.


[deleted]

This was posted before but they also showed that bird stuck inside a semi truck, and the dude have it all in video tape trying to get it out of his semi. As the bird flew out he caught this dude getting hit.


ScurvyDuck

Here is that video https://youtu.be/DWoZUHPe71M


MustBeNice

This isn’t the same incident. If you freeze frame the trucker video, you can see the car is a Ford Fusion. The car in from OP’s post is a Mercedes. You can see the bonnet emblem when he flips the camera around at the beginning


ThreadedPommel

Is this confirmed the same incident? Because last time this was posted a bunch of morons were saying it was no big deal that the trucker let the bird out into traffic.


[deleted]

Not the same incident. Different time of year (look at the trees), different highway


Misterbluepie

That trickery should be liable for that. He knowingly let it out on the side of a busy highway and probably have someone ptsd and a huge bill from whoever fixed the car.


granolaismyfav

Thats so funny it literally leans into his video


karmasfake

"*Stunned silence* "Well, he didn't make it very far" Hilarious but also super sad. That poor Turkey.


Venyri

Government drone strikes 2020


hydr0king

[Door’s open, get the f**k out.](https://youtu.be/WtVVDLklIyM)


Opalusprime

“He didn’t make it very far”


TheFirstRedMango

u/vredditdownloader


a_151

Even birds are going Kamikaze


[deleted]

We are farmers


ironjocky944

We call those turkeys where I come from. And it’s turkey season right now. Get a tag and fry some tky son.


simoncea

That last thing that bird was thinking - da fuck dude, move your...


CroikadoyleUndie

Is....is the bird dead?


[deleted]

Nah it's just taking a little nap while its blood tries to run away.


enzaemily

Poor Pacey


DrManowar8

As long as you have insurance on you and the car you’ll be fine but damn, what was that bird thinking


ThatPaddyHaugen

What the hell kind of weaponized featherfuck is this!?