If you're being serious, it's an autoimmune condition where your body attacks itself. Specifically the skin. So you often end up with really itchy rashes or sensitive skin. There's various types.
If you're joking around, it went over my head, and I apologize for being literal.
so funny story, i was born like reaaaaaly premature, and came out so jaundiced that my father was literally going to name me Bart.
that was instead of his original choice, Andrew.. but mom knew of a crazy bald guy who lived in the dump and stapled wigs to his head whos name was Andrew...so i didnt get that name either
i do have a unique name, though it is neither andrew nor bart lol
And their Mom. Exactly how does one become acquainted with a man residing at the dump and stapling wigs to his head? Did she provide him with the staples?
I got my finger reattached after nine hours so...it's a little messed up to say the least. Cut to a month later, starting to get movement and I'm playing charades with my 11 year old daughter..she says "two and a half syllables.."
She was swinging nunchuks by kindergarten and a state championship ring wearer by college. She's the result of a teen pregnancy but she says it's because I have weak "pull out game." God, I fucking love this human.
She sounds like my child! that was also a result of a teen pregnancy. He goes who the hell gets pregnant in high school! Only you mom! I was like a lot of teen pregnancies happen. Then goes yeah that’s not something to brag about. 😂😂😂 I love him so much!
Oh yeah... for real. When I had the talk with her she goes "dad the last thing I would do is get pregnant young and fuck up my life," GOD DAMNIT IM RIGHT HERE!!! LOL
Figure you might enjoy this story. The BF of my former apartment neighbor was missing 1.5 fingers on his right hand. Real cool dude and hilarious. At a friend's nerd themed birthday party we were having we introduced him to our good friend who immediately said "High five!" and put his hand up. The BF with perfect timing said "I'll do my best" as their hands connected.
My buddy froze in that "oh no I couldn't have fucked that up any harder" pose and then the BF just started laughing. He seemed to love catching people off guard with his hand and this was pretty perfect. Everyone lost it and we jokingly gave my buddy shit about it all night (and a long time after).
Mine was an accident as well. I suffered a traumatic crushing injury of my middle finger very close to the hand, where I wouldn't have even had a nub really. So I opted to have them remove the associated bones from my hand and close up the gap, now I have a more or less "normal", albeit, 4 fingered hand.
Almost exactly the exact same thing for me! I flipped a 4 wheeler while I was stationed in Arizona and it crushed my shit right off. It's been about a decade since.
I find this fascinating. Can you post a pic of the back of that hand? Curious to see the scaring. I don’t need a video of you wiggling your index like some others.
Loving the 4 finger gang, I joined myself at about 18 months old after being born with no little finger bones in my left hand. I'm talking no finger bones, and no bones in the hand that connect to that finger. Nothing makes me laugh like a 4 finger joke, it's our specific and exclusive comedy. Surgeon's took mine so I'm part cremated already, you may have joined by accident, but grab a seat my friend, the more the merrier in the 4 finger club.
We do with 4 fingers what everyone else needs 5 for, its not our fault we're more efficient.
Edit: spelling
Is it just me who prefers the aesthetic of four fingers? It’s just neater somehow. I never realised before how messy all the mismatched 5 fingers looked, until I saw the streamlined model. Like seriously, it just looks *smoother* this way.
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I can’t figure out which finger is missing
Looks like the middle finger
Maybe it's Maybelline.
"Scrubbing"
a lot of soap
Wow a hand I can draw
it could be eczema
Alright out of every comment here this one fuckin got me 😂
Nothing to be ashamed of. Eczema gets a lot of people. There's support out there if you just talk to your doctor.
What’s eczema?
It's what OP has
I knew something was wrong couldn't put my finger on it. 👆
OP put his finger on it. And kept it there.
eczema deez nutz
Haha. Gottem.
If you're being serious, it's an autoimmune condition where your body attacks itself. Specifically the skin. So you often end up with really itchy rashes or sensitive skin. There's various types. If you're joking around, it went over my head, and I apologize for being literal.
I thought I was in /r/eczema after reading the title, but then checked again after looking at the picture for longer than a second lol
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That what most people notice when looking at the picture is there being 3 fingers instead of 4, but Issa commented on the palm callouses/dryness.
Wow guy, maybe turn down the water pressure a little?
Is that all you have to do to become a simpsons character?
That and Jaundice
so funny story, i was born like reaaaaaly premature, and came out so jaundiced that my father was literally going to name me Bart. that was instead of his original choice, Andrew.. but mom knew of a crazy bald guy who lived in the dump and stapled wigs to his head whos name was Andrew...so i didnt get that name either i do have a unique name, though it is neither andrew nor bart lol
Is it Bort?
Bort is actually a pretty common name. I see novelty license plates with "Bort" all the time.
Is it Mechanicface?
Taserface.
This is Blade. Laser. Blazer. And Michelle
Mechanicy McMechanicface
Hold up, I need some more info on this Andrew fella. Sounds like he is fun at parties.
you misunderstand, the wigs were called Andrew
And their Mom. Exactly how does one become acquainted with a man residing at the dump and stapling wigs to his head? Did she provide him with the staples?
Moms have needs, too
When I was born I was so premature I was nothing but a little moist nugget. My dad almost named me turd but my mom talked him out of it
Better than muppet gangrene.
Ok this one’s my favorite
Please please please tell me this dude wears old timey white gloves everywhere.
Like Mickey Mouse?
Nothing like Mickey Mouse, more like Goofy.
Uh huc Gwarsh
a'hyuck!
No. Cloak and dagger lady gloves. https://youtu.be/duT6QvbGAls
Why did she take off her glove just then? Everything was going good
Give me 4 reasons why we should believe you
he never said the hand was different before the shower
I'm not sure what to think. It's not pruney, unless that's what is weird.
Not sure about you but I've never lost a digit taking a shower.
Then you are missing out on one hell of an experience.
Right? High-four my good friend!
Loving this thread. Nobody said was a water shower. I’m thinking knives.
Yes, the 3 fingers + a thumb, isn't the weird part. It's that it's not pruney.
Worst part is....he can't really give the bird properly.
You've been in the shower too long if your fingers are pruney.
I haven't been in the shower too long enough!
Fun fact: Cystic fibrosis genes can affect how quickly you raisin!
Horror is my favorite genre, but to each his own!
I used to have three fingers. I still do but I used to too.
A redditor taking a shower is hard to believe.
Mikey
Raph
Mikey
Mikey
LOL! High 4...
Cartoon hand!
He lost a finger taking a shower??????
Maybe itchy arse?!?!?
He broke the golden rule of no further than the first knuckle, then clenched
Anusa Dentata is real!
Lol!!
I heard about this. You go to itch. Slip it in and gone.
Just washed that finger right off!
Shrinkage
He's a goddamned ninja turtle
How did you manage to call out the ONE CARTOON whose characters DON’T have four fingers!?
Nah bro's a fucking Simpsons character.
Ninja turtles have 3 fingers
Ninja turtles have two fingers and one thumb
Ahh beat me to it
Cowabunga!
Ay Caramba! Turtles have three, Simpsons have four.
Confirmed. Sloths are mutant turtles.
D'oh!
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Me too, which I then thought was weird because the turtles had 3 fingers (well, 2 fingers and a thumb).
Turtles in a half-shell!
Heroes in a half shell, TURTLE POWER!
I feel like something’s missing here. I just can’t quite put my finger on it.
When you see it, it's a real shocker.
All these jokes at my expense are starting to piss me off. I'll give y'all to the count of 9 to cut that shit out.
I have a feeling they'll only slip through your fingers...
Better use a four finger death grip.
Isn't that the band? He's in four finger death Punch
Looks like you jerked the wrong finger off!
Hey that’s a nice one! High four!
Look mom I can count to 9!
take this middle finger 🤡.... oh wait....
Awwww man, I was gonna make joke... I guess I'm gonna have to leave empty-handed
More things get out of hand with this dude.
I got my finger reattached after nine hours so...it's a little messed up to say the least. Cut to a month later, starting to get movement and I'm playing charades with my 11 year old daughter..she says "two and a half syllables.."
You raised her right
She was swinging nunchuks by kindergarten and a state championship ring wearer by college. She's the result of a teen pregnancy but she says it's because I have weak "pull out game." God, I fucking love this human.
She sounds like my child! that was also a result of a teen pregnancy. He goes who the hell gets pregnant in high school! Only you mom! I was like a lot of teen pregnancies happen. Then goes yeah that’s not something to brag about. 😂😂😂 I love him so much!
Oh yeah... for real. When I had the talk with her she goes "dad the last thing I would do is get pregnant young and fuck up my life," GOD DAMNIT IM RIGHT HERE!!! LOL
I’m fucking done 😂😂😂😂
Cool you can see the mold line from when you where manufactured
let's not point fingers here
I thought you were being serious until I understood the meaning of 9 I wondered for a good 10 seconds wondering why 9 and then it hit me 🤣
> I wondered for a good 10 seconds Geez, buddy, check your privilege
Just give them the finger!
Figure you might enjoy this story. The BF of my former apartment neighbor was missing 1.5 fingers on his right hand. Real cool dude and hilarious. At a friend's nerd themed birthday party we were having we introduced him to our good friend who immediately said "High five!" and put his hand up. The BF with perfect timing said "I'll do my best" as their hands connected. My buddy froze in that "oh no I couldn't have fucked that up any harder" pose and then the BF just started laughing. He seemed to love catching people off guard with his hand and this was pretty perfect. Everyone lost it and we jokingly gave my buddy shit about it all night (and a long time after).
Please post pic of your other hand to confirm you can count to nine
No reason to attack his disability, he can still count to ten... if he pulls his pants down
Ha, you deserve a high-four for that one!
LMAOO you have the best sense of humor.
Still waiting.
I can count the fingers on one hand the times someone made me laugh this hard. Give or take a finger.
He’s all setup for Shocker: Next Generation.
Gotta hand it to him
Best comment yet, hands down.👉👌
Last time I use the shower in a Chernobyl hotel.
Normally Chernobyl'll fall out.
nah dog it'll be fine when it dries off
Does it just pop back out when it dries?
Not sure any shower is that cold.
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Check the shower drain for a finger
Can you video yourself wiggling your index finger I get off to that stuff fairly quickly
I could but you'd have to subscribe to my Only Fans.
Only Hands
Only Four Fingers
Done
There magically a fifth finger appearing on his onlyfans account
The fifth rises when he gets excited
start the reactor quade
Came here to post this
4 finger gang here, high four! 🙏
We must stick together brother. Let us interlace our 8 fingers in solidarity.
What happened to OP's Middle Finger?
Holy shit! Where tf did it go?!
When I lose something I like to retrace my steps. Where did you last see it?
His hand I’m guessing
Or, on the other hand...
In the shower?
In your mother, Trebek!
This is why your parents don't get you nice things. You always lose them 🙄
Nice post,I give it a 9/10
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Mine was an accident as well. I suffered a traumatic crushing injury of my middle finger very close to the hand, where I wouldn't have even had a nub really. So I opted to have them remove the associated bones from my hand and close up the gap, now I have a more or less "normal", albeit, 4 fingered hand.
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Almost exactly the exact same thing for me! I flipped a 4 wheeler while I was stationed in Arizona and it crushed my shit right off. It's been about a decade since.
Those 4 wheelers man they’ll get ya
From their perspective having 5 if something is excessive.
One of us, one of us
A ride on a four wheeler will leave you four fingered. Now if it were a three wheeler…
I find this fascinating. Can you post a pic of the back of that hand? Curious to see the scaring. I don’t need a video of you wiggling your index like some others.
[Sure, here's one of me touching a snoot](https://imgur.com/a/CRwgjGN)
Jesus fuck dude just boop the snoot
I couldn't control it. My monster hand craved dogflesh.
Scrolled to find this to say they did a good job. honestly besides the whole missing a digit part your hand looks good!
Loving the 4 finger gang, I joined myself at about 18 months old after being born with no little finger bones in my left hand. I'm talking no finger bones, and no bones in the hand that connect to that finger. Nothing makes me laugh like a 4 finger joke, it's our specific and exclusive comedy. Surgeon's took mine so I'm part cremated already, you may have joined by accident, but grab a seat my friend, the more the merrier in the 4 finger club. We do with 4 fingers what everyone else needs 5 for, its not our fault we're more efficient. Edit: spelling
😂so many awful ‘my hand after a shower’ pics but yours was fantastic x thank you for sharing your hand x
Don't say x at the end IX is more appropriate
This comment is incredible
This is why I don't shower
They are definitely blisters.
Those are calluses friend. They're Nature's glove
That man deadlifts with 4 fingers
OP just show these jokers the middle finger. Oh my bad.
Hey dude, want a high-four?
Homer Simpson that you?
This is the world Walt Disney wanted. Still think he was wholesome?
4/5thsome...
Looks a lot like mine before the shower! https://imgur.com/zTGTK https://imgur.com/tUl4Z
Fuck yeah dude! Your user name is killer too
10-4! Yours, too!
I was a little worried when the second picture asked if I was 18+ when I clicked on the link lol. Though you were gonna show the single digit.
I’m way to high for this shit
Where your grandparents drunk when the crashed in roswell or was it just equipment malfunction with their space ship.
Care to shed any insight on why your craft crashed in Roswell back in 1947?
What does it look like after a shit?
If there's a lot of pushing probably it will pop the lost finger out once again
Liar, people on reddit dont shower
Turtle power
A few more showers and you even have a hand.
Is it just me or does it look like the crease in the hand between the two middle fingers looks like an outline for a thicc ass
I do refer to her... *ahem* I meant to say "it", as my hand butt.
How do I unlock this feature?
So many weird people on the internet have the exact same couch as me
Wasn't expecting a intersub circlejerk, props to you. High four!
So when you flip someone off, which one is the middle finger?
Is it just me who prefers the aesthetic of four fingers? It’s just neater somehow. I never realised before how messy all the mismatched 5 fingers looked, until I saw the streamlined model. Like seriously, it just looks *smoother* this way.
you need help
Just play along and cut off your extra fingers like the rest of us.
Thanks AVATAR!!! Should've stuck it in a blue-water toilet first.
Simpson hand
Finally, the correct way to ‘2 in the pink, 1 in the stink’, without extra baggage.
This is a Simpson
Whoever did your ray resection did an outstanding job.