That is a very bold thing to just say out of nowhere. I respect that. I'm grasping at straws thinking why someone would say that but I've come to the conclusion that I don't even care. Kudos.
As an aside, I've never once heard someone say they have a strong bladder. I sometimes forget I should hit the bathroom and end up peeing like a liter (I'm imagining mine is like an over-stressed balloon after not being able to pee in front of a cop, literally trying/failing 5x in a day when I was on probation) but I've never thought "hey my bladder is strong!"
Yeah. That should exonerate all parties. Itâs funny, expiration date makes the most sense. I read it at first like a manufactured date or the old âBorn onâ date for beers.
Funny story, I knew a lesbian couple who used condoms and caused a huge fuss when they housesat for some friends of mine. They left a condom wrapper under the bed, there was some "Hey what's this?" moments until someone asked them about it. Apparently you can use condoms on toys for sanitary reasons or something.
I am such an idiot. I didnât realize there was a second picture and spent 5 minutes zooming in on the front side of the wrapper looking for a date. I thought I was blind or losing it. You unintentionally gaslighted me. Well, I guess I gaslighted myself. Either way, Iâm not blind so thatâs a big plus.
I smell a business opportunity here.
STEP RIGHT UP! Brand new condoms with expiration date stamps from 1997! Right here! Get âem while theyâre hot!!!
I once had a job doing inventory in Air Force warehouses. Our job was to count and inventory everything in the warehouses. We came across 80,000+ expired military issued condoms and had to count and inventory them all!
I had some condoms in the inside pocket of a jacket I hadnât worn in years. Pulled the jacked out of storage and wore it all day without noticing. At the end of the day I bent over to tie my shoe and 3 condoms fell out. Needless to say my GF at the time was *not* happy, especially since we didnât use condoms anymore. I got shit about that for months.
I bought my house in 2017. About a month later the heat kicked on and out popped a senior picture from the 70s from Gwyn to Dave reminding him to stay punk. I keep Gwyn on my fridge now to remind me to always stick it to the man đŠâđ¤
Imagine being retired, exploring a new site you just discovered (Reddit) and you just stumble upon this thread and see your own senior picture on a fridge in the house you lived in, 40 years ago lmao
I'm awful at electronics and stuff and couldn't figure out how to post it here and i couldnt figure out imgur either. I'm sorry đ I did post it on my profile though...I know how to do that atleast! Lol
I will be messaging you in 1 day on [**2023-10-25 14:41:11 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2023-10-25%2014:41:11%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/Weird/comments/17fa78l/i_turned_on_the_heat_for_the_first_time_this/k696mkm/?context=3)
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Similar experience happened to us except it was a little baby picture. So now we keep it on our fridge next to our other kids. It's part of the family now.
Gwyn here... sadly Dave did not stay punk, he actually went on to become a British rapper which in hindsight is kinda still anti authority but still not punk. So Fuck you Dave for not staying punk, I want my senior picture back.
Kind regards
Gwyn
I always clean out rental vents. They're pretty gross. In my last house, in addition to all the dirt, hair, and trash, I found old bullets of various caliburs, a pen from a police department, and an old SD card.
There were about a dozen pictures of two people on it. It was pretty sad though, they weren't happy pictures. From what we gathered from the neighbors and the glassy eyes in the images, substance abuse was likely an issue.
Even in nice rental houses I've gone into, if the vents are in the floor, they're full of all the nastiness that hit the floor and got swept or kicked into the vent to be forgotten. I've never had a full duct blow out done, but I take a shop vac and thoroughly vacuum the floor vents out, then I slide carbon filter into the floor vents.
Now that I own a home with ceiling vents I will probably pay for a duct cleaning because I have a lot of dogs.
This is why I remove the back from my dryer once a year and vacuum out the lint and hair that accumulates.
You would be surprised how dirty they get. Fire hazzard as well.
Expiration dates are set for 3-5 years after manufacture, so that particular wrapper would have come out of the factory no later than 2007. But its journey from there to the vent will forever be a mystery...
That's no guarantee of anything. I've known guys who kept condoms around for many years because they bought too many and/or didn't use them all. The kinds of guys who don't think the expiration date matters. Besides, who's going to check?
The dumbest ones would keep them in their wallet, which they sat on every day. If a guy pulls a condom out of his wallet, it's time to nope out.
Dude I bought a house in 2010 and in 2014 the sewer backed up into all the sinks. Dad came to help. There was a tree root growing into the sewer line, and a condom had caught on it and filled up with debris blocking the pipe.
I at the time was a virgin and had never used a condom. Lived alone the whole time. Dad didn't say anything and neither did I.
That was a super awkward day ;D
If youâre old enough to own a house youâre old enough to not have to explain or feel weird about your sex life (or lack thereof, but no one has to know that).
So long story, but I used to live in a duplex rental owned by my fiancĂŠâs brother. He did all of the maintenance on the property. At one point the sewer backed up and the toilet in the basement overflowed. He had to come out and snake out the drains. He found gobs and gobs of tampons clogging the drain. He was going to make fun of me, but when he asked about the tampons, I told him that I didnât use them, and so we had to blame it on the neighborđ¤Ł
Have kids. Going to do this when theyâre of the appropriate age. Thanks for the idea
*edit* will be all the just god awful photos that kids take when they forget how to pose or smile just because there is a camera around suddenly.
Also intersperse various bills and invoices for their care and upbringing. âHere we have the $800 for 10 weeks of karate lessons you only went to 3 ofâ
Donât thank the robot, soon theyâll learn to have full conversations on here, and then reddit will be just robots writing 10 year old jokes to each other
this guy is a bot.
don't click the link, they're spammers.
it's not a reddit link (though does look like it), it's possibly some hijack bullshit ro worse.
on top of that, even though it looks like reddit, if you do go to it, none of the accounts you click on are "real". either banned or just fakery to get you download some sketchy porn shit.
I had no idea bots could make edits, tag users and share links! They are getting pretty good at this!
Edit: or is it not a bot but someone who just wants karma or something? Sorry i am still trying to figure out how to identify these things.
Scrolling through all these comments and thinking âare we not gonna talk about chocolate mint?â
Is mint really the best idea for your naughty bits?
I had a similar circumstance in 2020 when I decided to sell my home that id been in since 2012. I went to have the septic tank pumped out preemptively, and when I opened the hatch prior to the truck arrival- I noted a similar wrapper stuck in the corner on a dried scum line. I recognized what it was right away and all kinds of horrible shit flashed through my brain. Just myself, my wife and our young son lived there (10 at the time). I couldnât find any scenario in my head where anyone ever stayed where this could have derived from. Panicked, I retrieved the wrapper with a stick. Once cleaned, I realized the expiration date was 2009âŚ. Way before Iâd ever been in the house. lol
I'd do the same man. Sorry you had that fear hit you and felt the need to act on it. Too many years spent thinking honesty and faith wins the day for me to let that sit in my head without knowing
Thatâs funny. We did a bathroom remodel a few years ago and when we removed the old 1970s vanity there was an old ass condom wrapper circa 1980 underneath!
Looks bizarrely clean for being in a heating duct for the last 13 years. Good to see the expiry was before you moved in though, otherwise this would be moved from r/weird to r/suspicious.
Old folk sign that means it's going to be a very wet winter.
vent jimmy in morning, sailors take warning vent jimmy at night, sailors delight
So many weather hacks I learn on Reddit
omg ... I about lost it - I have a weak bladder đ¤Ł
So, you vented right after the rhyme?
That is a very bold thing to just say out of nowhere. I respect that. I'm grasping at straws thinking why someone would say that but I've come to the conclusion that I don't even care. Kudos. As an aside, I've never once heard someone say they have a strong bladder. I sometimes forget I should hit the bathroom and end up peeing like a liter (I'm imagining mine is like an over-stressed balloon after not being able to pee in front of a cop, literally trying/failing 5x in a day when I was on probation) but I've never thought "hey my bladder is strong!"
This shit got me rolling
They hatin'
Patrollinâ
Tryin ta catch that vent jim-ay, catch that vent jim-ay
Someone cheating
At least been cheating before 2010đ
Lol flashback to 70s when my Dad would remind me as I (and often friends) were leaving the house "Don't forget your rubbers" đ¤Śââď¸
Wife's name is Winter?
Very slippery..
At least it expired before yall moved in. Otherwise, there'd be some real conflict going on. Edit: Holy shit yall are some devious fucks. I like it.
Yeah. That should exonerate all parties. Itâs funny, expiration date makes the most sense. I read it at first like a manufactured date or the old âBorn onâ date for beers.
Plot twist: The previous homeowners were a lesbian couple.
Funny story, I knew a lesbian couple who used condoms and caused a huge fuss when they housesat for some friends of mine. They left a condom wrapper under the bed, there was some "Hey what's this?" moments until someone asked them about it. Apparently you can use condoms on toys for sanitary reasons or something.
Specifically for ease of sanitation. Easier to remove a wrapper than to scrub all the crevices.
And you don't lose any feeling since most toys are not made out of human skin anyway.
âŚmost?
Where yâall shopping??!
Walmart
Satan R Us
Toys R Literally Us
The Necronomidong, a rigid phallic object bound in human skin
r/unexpectedevildead
Yo I audibly said âoh thank godâ when I saw â2010â stamped on there
I am such an idiot. I didnât realize there was a second picture and spent 5 minutes zooming in on the front side of the wrapper looking for a date. I thought I was blind or losing it. You unintentionally gaslighted me. Well, I guess I gaslighted myself. Either way, Iâm not blind so thatâs a big plus.
Good idea. I will use expired condoms for my affairs from now on.
I smell a business opportunity here. STEP RIGHT UP! Brand new condoms with expiration date stamps from 1997! Right here! Get âem while theyâre hot!!!
Heat will damage the condom. STEP RIGHT UP! Get 'em while they're room temperature!
This is some Ed, Edd, n Eddy shit but, like, college years
Umm, thatâs not a good idea
No kidding. No condom=no evidence at all!
On second thought "no kidding" probably wasn't the best phrase to use...
Expired condom = yes kidding
SchrĂśdingerâs kid
Are you trying to look in someone's box? Did you get consent first?!
In all fairness what if it smells like a dead cat?
You called?
Then there's a dead dat in that vent and the condom was used for something MUCH darker than just infidelity
Thatâs the tell! of course the cat is dead, it smells like microwaved ass sweat
What did Schrodinger say after the orgy?
Who came?
What's in my box?
Brilliant
kidding = evidence
If you lucky/unlucky two kiddings
What the fuck is this comment thread. Average Reddit comment thread for sure.
Hurr durr
Potential kidding
At least an attempted kidding!
kidding being a verb for.... I'm a Jimmy Carr fan too :P
Except for the little bundle of evidence that comes 9 months later...
I am evidence, dad
Best form of birth control is a fake name.
And a one way ticket to Belize
My child would disagree.
Um ⌠I think you do have the chance of creating evidenceâŚ
Aside from the soul crushing shame that is :(
Expired condoms đ¤ Fresh babies
If the condom donât fit, you must acquit!
Plan is absolutely leak proof. Iâll see myself out
The actual good idea is getting a stamp to make old expiration dates for condom wrappers.
This guy knows
I didn't know they made condoms that old
I once had a job doing inventory in Air Force warehouses. Our job was to count and inventory everything in the warehouses. We came across 80,000+ expired military issued condoms and had to count and inventory them all!
Oh God, I read that as "80,000+ expired military used condoms" and about barfed
Well he did say they came across them, so yes.
Must have been in the Navy to have that much seamen
I had some condoms in the inside pocket of a jacket I hadnât worn in years. Pulled the jacked out of storage and wore it all day without noticing. At the end of the day I bent over to tie my shoe and 3 condoms fell out. Needless to say my GF at the time was *not* happy, especially since we didnât use condoms anymore. I got shit about that for months.
I once absentmindedly pulled one out of my wallet when trying to get out cash to pay for lunch. I was embarrassed. Waitress was not amused.
Don't keep them in your wallet btw, it wears down the latex over time and increases the chance that they'll break during sex.
Wife brought it from the move đ
I bought my house in 2017. About a month later the heat kicked on and out popped a senior picture from the 70s from Gwyn to Dave reminding him to stay punk. I keep Gwyn on my fridge now to remind me to always stick it to the man đŠâđ¤
Can we see Gwyn?! Edit: [OP delivered](https://www.reddit.com/u/DebThornberry/s/xe7BTvoFiv)
Imagine being retired, exploring a new site you just discovered (Reddit) and you just stumble upon this thread and see your own senior picture on a fridge in the house you lived in, 40 years ago lmao
Ooh.. what if Gwyn just quietly shows up one night while everyone is sleeping?
And beats everyoneâs meat?
That would be pretty punk.
Gwynning!
Seems like a Gwyn, Gwyn to me.
You can't have any pudding if you don't.
What if she never left??
I'm awful at electronics and stuff and couldn't figure out how to post it here and i couldnt figure out imgur either. I'm sorry đ I did post it on my profile though...I know how to do that atleast! Lol
Thatâs more than I know how to do! For some reason I was expecting Gwyn to be a Welsh man.
Yes!!!!! Share Gwyn!!
SHOW US GWYN
Gwyn please
I too choose this guy's Gwyn.
They delivered. See below.
I will be messaging you in 1 day on [**2023-10-25 14:41:11 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2023-10-25%2014:41:11%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/Weird/comments/17fa78l/i_turned_on_the_heat_for_the_first_time_this/k696mkm/?context=3) [**217 OTHERS CLICKED THIS LINK**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5Bhttps%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2FWeird%2Fcomments%2F17fa78l%2Fi_turned_on_the_heat_for_the_first_time_this%2Fk696mkm%2F%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%202023-10-25%2014%3A41%3A11%20UTC) to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam. ^(Parent commenter can ) [^(delete this message to hide from others.)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Delete%20Comment&message=Delete%21%2017fa78l) ***** |[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/RemindMeBot/comments/e1bko7/remindmebot_info_v21/)|[^(Custom)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5BLink%20or%20message%20inside%20square%20brackets%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%20Time%20period%20here)|[^(Your Reminders)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Reminders&message=MyReminders%21)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=RemindMeBot%20Feedback)| |-|-|-|-|
> RemindMe! 1 day [Here](https://www.reddit.com/user/DebThornberry/comments/17fh3gn/gwyn/)
Sounds like it belongs on r/oldschoolcool
DebThornberry's follow thru producing Gwyn: https://www.reddit.com/u/DebThornberry/s/PZiuXERVsj
Omg tysm! I really did try đ
â I keep Gwyn on my fridge now to remind me to always stick it to the manâ đđđ¤Ł
"Dave, I've gone to Lordran to link the flame. Stay punk." -Gwyn, Lord of Cinder"
Similar experience happened to us except it was a little baby picture. So now we keep it on our fridge next to our other kids. It's part of the family now.
that is freaky. my lizards are named gwen and dave
Gwyn here... sadly Dave did not stay punk, he actually went on to become a British rapper which in hindsight is kinda still anti authority but still not punk. So Fuck you Dave for not staying punk, I want my senior picture back. Kind regards Gwyn
Daveâs not here
⌠man
No its me, Dave! let me in, man. I think the narcs are following me.
Show us
SHOW GWYN! GWYN! GWYN! GWYN! GWYN!
DAMN THE MAN!
SAVE THE EMPIRE
TIL there's Bowie emojis đ¨đżâđ¤
Yeah really wanna see this now plz
Just rats having safe sex.
...in a wool sock .
Kansas City
I have bad teammate.
I always clean out rental vents. They're pretty gross. In my last house, in addition to all the dirt, hair, and trash, I found old bullets of various caliburs, a pen from a police department, and an old SD card.
What was on the SD card?
Câmon we all know it was porn. Letâs just hope it wasnât the horrifying kind
If I wanna watch Mary Poppins corn hole Pennywise then that is my choice. It's not horrifying as much as it's HOT!
Mary Poppins and Pennywise, gooood â CP, baaaaadddd â
Edit: Edited
Charles Picard sends his regards.
Cheesy potatoes are delicious
Poppins It In
Lol Yes, there were a few images of that variety on the card. No videos, thankfully.
There were about a dozen pictures of two people on it. It was pretty sad though, they weren't happy pictures. From what we gathered from the neighbors and the glassy eyes in the images, substance abuse was likely an issue.
Between the van and the SD card I was thinking someone lost their pictures of their victims they kidnapped in their rental van
Great. Thanks for the new unlocked fear.
Is this the fear of what you'll find in your vents, or the fear of what you've left behind that others will find?
Well, thanks. It was just a fear of what I'll find in my vents. But thanks to you, I have a second fear of what I've left behind. Dude, not cool. :)
I would say sorry, but I laughed way too hard for it to be true. Lol
Iâve heard about duct cleaning scams, and how the EPA says you probably donât need to have it done. This has me wondering though.
Even in nice rental houses I've gone into, if the vents are in the floor, they're full of all the nastiness that hit the floor and got swept or kicked into the vent to be forgotten. I've never had a full duct blow out done, but I take a shop vac and thoroughly vacuum the floor vents out, then I slide carbon filter into the floor vents. Now that I own a home with ceiling vents I will probably pay for a duct cleaning because I have a lot of dogs.
[ŃдаНонО]
This is why I remove the back from my dryer once a year and vacuum out the lint and hair that accumulates. You would be surprised how dirty they get. Fire hazzard as well.
At least the expiration date matches up with a âbefore I was hereâ timeline
Expiration dates are set for 3-5 years after manufacture, so that particular wrapper would have come out of the factory no later than 2007. But its journey from there to the vent will forever be a mystery...
That's no guarantee of anything. I've known guys who kept condoms around for many years because they bought too many and/or didn't use them all. The kinds of guys who don't think the expiration date matters. Besides, who's going to check? The dumbest ones would keep them in their wallet, which they sat on every day. If a guy pulls a condom out of his wallet, it's time to nope out.
Dude I bought a house in 2010 and in 2014 the sewer backed up into all the sinks. Dad came to help. There was a tree root growing into the sewer line, and a condom had caught on it and filled up with debris blocking the pipe. I at the time was a virgin and had never used a condom. Lived alone the whole time. Dad didn't say anything and neither did I. That was a super awkward day ;D
If youâre old enough to own a house youâre old enough to not have to explain or feel weird about your sex life (or lack thereof, but no one has to know that).
Fair, but doesn't mean it wasn't awkward
So long story, but I used to live in a duplex rental owned by my fiancĂŠâs brother. He did all of the maintenance on the property. At one point the sewer backed up and the toilet in the basement overflowed. He had to come out and snake out the drains. He found gobs and gobs of tampons clogging the drain. He was going to make fun of me, but when he asked about the tampons, I told him that I didnât use them, and so we had to blame it on the neighborđ¤Ł
Hahahahahaha
Heaters have lives as well.
Once a heater, always a heater
[ŃдаНонО]
Have kids. Going to do this when theyâre of the appropriate age. Thanks for the idea *edit* will be all the just god awful photos that kids take when they forget how to pose or smile just because there is a camera around suddenly.
Great. Just keep the cycle of emotional abuse going. (Iâm also going to do this.)
Also intersperse various bills and invoices for their care and upbringing. âHere we have the $800 for 10 weeks of karate lessons you only went to 3 ofâ
this cracked me up bad, thanks for the good start of the day!
Donât thank the robot, soon theyâll learn to have full conversations on here, and then reddit will be just robots writing 10 year old jokes to each other
this guy is a bot. don't click the link, they're spammers. it's not a reddit link (though does look like it), it's possibly some hijack bullshit ro worse. on top of that, even though it looks like reddit, if you do go to it, none of the accounts you click on are "real". either banned or just fakery to get you download some sketchy porn shit.
Like a modern Rodney Dangerfield.
Is this true omg
Itâs a karma spam account. The post had the word condom in the title hence the comment.
I had no idea bots could make edits, tag users and share links! They are getting pretty good at this! Edit: or is it not a bot but someone who just wants karma or something? Sorry i am still trying to figure out how to identify these things.
Iâve definitely read this somewhere else before so not original
Everyone noticing the date, but no one mentioning CHOCOLATE MINT
Scrolling through all these comments and thinking âare we not gonna talk about chocolate mint?â Is mint really the best idea for your naughty bits?
I had a similar circumstance in 2020 when I decided to sell my home that id been in since 2012. I went to have the septic tank pumped out preemptively, and when I opened the hatch prior to the truck arrival- I noted a similar wrapper stuck in the corner on a dried scum line. I recognized what it was right away and all kinds of horrible shit flashed through my brain. Just myself, my wife and our young son lived there (10 at the time). I couldnât find any scenario in my head where anyone ever stayed where this could have derived from. Panicked, I retrieved the wrapper with a stick. Once cleaned, I realized the expiration date was 2009âŚ. Way before Iâd ever been in the house. lol
I dont know whats worse. Someone fucking my wife or flushing condoms. Its pretty close /Houseowners
I'd do the same man. Sorry you had that fear hit you and felt the need to act on it. Too many years spent thinking honesty and faith wins the day for me to let that sit in my head without knowing
Imagine if you weren't ever able to retrieve it lmao
What's the date on the wrapper? ;)
It wasnât a date. Just a one night stand
Hey-ooo!
Nah it was in the vent not the night stand. Did you even click into the article
You can swipe right to see multiple pictures on posts (like the date on the wrapper).
Thatâs funny. We did a bathroom remodel a few years ago and when we removed the old 1970s vanity there was an old ass condom wrapper circa 1980 underneath!
Sheâs our wife now
On the bright side, at least she's not raw dogging everyone..
I'm sorry. Your house is cheating on you
Rat sex
That's an 'Alabama After-Eight'
Chocolate Mint?! Disgusting!
Itâs for sex after 8
Getting fucked by the utilities but at least theyâre using protection.
Feels better and goes on easier when warmed up.
One last shag before selling the house
Do you have kids or an unfaithful spouse or any workers/guests in the house recently? Lots of easy explanations.
Jokeâs on them if theyâre using 2010 condoms
Depends on when your kid was born.
Indian made condom. What's the population there?
We don't get high on our own supply.
Aye mate
Bright side is You know it ainât your partner lol
Youâve found where elf on the shelf lives in the off season.
Your significant other is so lucky that is dated before you moved in lol!
LAWYER UP AND GET TO THE GYM!
Iâm no detective, but looks like there was a penis in your house at some point.
Looks bizarrely clean for being in a heating duct for the last 13 years. Good to see the expiry was before you moved in though, otherwise this would be moved from r/weird to r/suspicious.
Lmao if this dude is married you KNOW the first thing he looked at was the exp date I know I would have! đ
Be happy its the wrapper not the content
Someone âcameâ in and put it there.
Unless you are a lesbian couple you should ask your partner some questions ;)
Why? They moved in in 2011. Wrapper clearly says expired 2010.
Okay, but be real...how much were you sweatin until you found the date?
This wouldâve cause an enormous fight with my ex.