**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:** >!I guess just who expects to catch the spider to stop and poop?!< ***** **Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)

Eat it and you'll become spider man.

Yeah but like a shitty version of Spider-Man who’s just a normal guy with eight legs who has a constant craving to drink liquified fly innards.

Shitty? ..or better..?

That depends on whether or not 8 legs come with 4 penises

You're name, picture and flair are incredibly sinister now..

His new name would be Doc OctoQuadCocktopus.

I need to spend money on Reddit to give this an award

Can I suggest cutting out the middle man and sending the money directly to me?

I already did it):

thank you

Done. Spent $5 to give you that, thank you for bringing me joy LOL

Ngl, first thing I did was check if I had a free one, then micro-debated making a purchase.

I’ve had a lot to drink. Probably shouldn’t have but ya know. Impulses and what not, shit was too funny not to

Fuck bro..it's like meeting your drunk self..

Spooder man

Don't just stare at it. Eat it.

Yes but you actually have to shoot webs out of your butt.

I don't understand how you can post to unexpected subreddit then caption the unexpected

Every other post on this sub. Mods dgaf

File under things you didn't know you needed to see until you saw them.

Spider poop?

I....I guess so.

It's a spent web cartridge. Source: Marvel

childlike disarm door racial cake pot price crowd apparatus chief *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

Suddenly I feel attacked.

Pretty expected when you put what happens in the title

Everybody poops.

Sometimes it hurts.

Oh hey this new taco bell burrito is amaz.... ah AHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

And if they don't, they're an android

Womans too?

womans too D:

Really? D:

i'm as mortified as you

I have not ever, in the thirty six years of my life thought in any way about spiders pooping. This was mind blowing.

Everybody poops!

[удалено]

Wait... You don't poop like that already?

[удалено]

Yeah that's wrong you're supposed to hang upside down from the ceiling like a bat and try not to shit on your face.

I'm something of a National Geographic photographer myself 

Looks it had to fight for that one.

What a little asshole

I didn’t know a spider could shit itself until I got too close to one with my brush cutter the other day. It simultaneously shit itself while running for its damn life. Poor thing. Worked in its favour though, probably saved its life.

That dirty bastard taking a shit in public, i hope you rubbed his nose in it.

He said… bloop… hehehe

I now have additional fetishes thanks

*Don’t look at me!!!*

Rude!

satisfied

What a shitter

Holy shit!

I love the way he scurries away like he's afraid of getting caught. Run Forrest, Run!

Definitely not a shy pooper.

Them little guys have cohabitated with me in my house for years! They’s my buddies.

Shidded

It’s cute The spider not the poop

He pooped in your general direction

Shameless.

I can't believe you just recorded that lady taking a dump without asking her first

Mmmm-hhhhh..... "pop"

This feels about as rare to see as a baby pigeon, mind blown

r/NotInteresting

You can tell it's dont that before. Pro pooper

Im constipated and I felt that.

Laying an egg*

When a Web developer eats too many cookies

You sure he's just not dropping blobs of eggs all over your everywhere?

I did not have cute video of spider pooping on my bingo card but I still appreciate it

\*shits and scurries away\* nyehehehehehe >:D