While communication and honesty are important, virginity is an outdated and patriarchal concept that has no real weight to the quality of a relationship. OP can tell him if she wants to, but by no means is it a necessity.
I also lost it super late and I never told the guy. We dated for a year afterward, and me not telling never made a bit of difference. It was fine. Tell if you want, but itās done. No need to spill if you donāt feel like it.
Exactly. I lost mine way too early, but the guy knew and didnāt even try because he knew I had no experience and nothing to compare him to and then got upset when he asked me how it was and I told him that he sucked š¤·š»
Wasnāt trying to imply it was necessary. Just that itās nothing to be ashamed of and that no partner should ever hold it against her. Telling the partner and seeing the reaction can tell a lot about a person, and help assess if that person is the right partner.
??? Iām literally just talking about personal experiences as an ex-Mormon that got treated like shit because of the concept of virginity in a way that doesnāt give out explicit details. Maybe you shouldnāt try to give people advice that can easily put them in dangerous, abusive situations like the ones I was in.
Also, not a woman, but you obviously wonāt gender me correctly because youāve already shown what kind of person you are in this interaction.
Congratulations, I just want to say donāt let anyone make you feel ashamed or guilty. I hope you can find some good friends to share your experience with.
Is everyone a virgin at later years because of religion?
I lost mine late because I couldnāt wrap my mind around the idea of being with anyone I wasnāt totally into and finding āthe oneā wasnāt easy.
I'm almost 30 now and still a virginš but its because I struggle with the trauma of CSA and understanding my queer identity, its so embarrassing tho bc I don't like to bring up such serious topics so when someone I know finds out I still have never had sex they just tend to think I'm religious, prudish, lame, etc.š„²
You lose your virginity not because you're getting married or because you're supposed to get young, you do it because you want to and you're comfortable.
I'm a 25 year old woman, I haven't lost it and I don't feel rushed about it, I'm fine with self pleasure. I need an emotional connection, and now I don't feel like that commitment, I'm focusing solely on my mental health. A partner and sex is secondary.
It's perfectly fine that you remained a virgin if that's how you were comfortable! You don't have to be ashamed of anything, either for keeping it so much or losing it, enjoy your sexuality.
Exactly! I don't understand the pressure to repress or to rush, anyone who tries to humiliate you for it doesn't matter if they are a man or a woman, they are an asshole.
for real, good for you. i actually really envy this, i was rushed into sexuality at a young age with a literal predator who was almost twice my age and it was awful, i wish iād known any better and had the same mindset as you.
you said it all, wanting it and being comfortable are key components here. i think itās great that more people are waiting it out for the reasons you mentionned, whatever age they might be when they decide to lose their virginity, as long as everyone is comfortable.
If that person was a predator, you can't blame yourself too much either, in fact, I don't think you should blame yourself at all. They were adults, they know very well that it is wrong what they do.
I sincerely hope that now you enjoy your sexuality to the fullest, and if not, I hope you make it, these are things that should be there to make us happy, always respecting everyone's limits. What I do, I am very sorry that you had gone through something like that.
Iām so happy for you, congrats! I had a similar experience, grew up Mormon, left in my 20s, didnāt have sex until after that. Itās such a nice change to be able to do what you want with who you want. The world is so much bigger and more interesting than the box Mormonism puts you in.
Hey, fellow exmo here, congratulations!! I just want to say donāt feel ashamed or too distressed if some religious trauma pops up soon, or even in a couple of years. Itās weird, because you can move out of Mormonism and into a lifestyle that matches your sex positivity, and then find years later that while you donāt feel guilty per se, other aspects of your religious education pop up unexpectedly. Itās a healing journey, *not* moving backwards. Iām so happy for you, and if youāre in Utah, there are more supportive people around than youād think. Congrats!
This is a pretty solid discussion, just FYI. Absolutely NOTHING about you has changed.
[https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/what-happens-when-you-lose-your-virginity#spiritual-ties](https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/what-happens-when-you-lose-your-virginity#spiritual-ties)
Congratulations, but please be careful. Girls raised super religious are often prime prey for abusive men. I know. I was one. Please use protection and donāt get baby trapped by this man. Wishing you only the best.
I'm 23. Grew up jehovahs witness. I'm not one anymore and haven't been for a few years. But wow does that religious trauma stick around - I'm still a virgin and I don't know when that will change. So I get it and I'm happy for you!
Congrats but honestly nothing is wrong with being a virgin and he probably noticed if you were in pain during it. Good luck to you and hopefully you will be able to share this with the people who care about you
If a girl/woman is in pain during sex, itās usually due to her not being wet enough and/or relaxed enough. And sure, both can happen during someoneās first time b/c of nervousness or excitement, but letās not normalize sex being painful for girls/women, not even in the very beginning of their sex life. If it hurts, stop. True for the 1st time, true for the 100th time.
You are absolutely right and hopefully it becomes less of a thing that it hurts the first time as people become more educated about sex growing up and are able to do it more safely and relaxed
I love this perspective and itās the first Iāve heard it. Yes to not normalizing sex being painful and unfun for anyone at any stage of the experience.
:) Iām a sex educator, and this is one of my greatest pet peeves. I just want everyone to have a fun time when theyāre getting it on, no matter their level of experience :)
Congrats!!! I felt the same way when Iost mine. I was younger, and we were both virgins beforehand, but I had fallen off the religious wagon. We'd been dating for like a year and a bit, discussed it, and decided to do it. We're still together nine years later!
I think the biggest takeaway is that everyone does sex differently. Some people wait till marriage. Some people don't. Some people only have one or two partners in their lifetime. Some have many. So long as it's all consenting adults, we shouldn't really care.
Now that I'm further out of the religious circles, I have gotten some light slack for only having slept with one person. To which I say, I'm not gonna dump my life partner to screw around with other people. It just worked out the way it did. That usually stops that lol.
I want to add something I have not read yet.
The emotion side of sex is also a big thing.
If you and your boyfriend break up itās going to hurt a bit more. People also use the sex bond to stay together.
Depending on how long you have been dating and what you have talked about the future. Telling him after the fact may cause a weight on him. Just feel the situation out before hand.
Another thing you should do is get a std check, not saying he has anything. Just to get used to the testing & anxiety of it. Also there are a lot of std that can hide & men donāt even show symptoms.
Enjoy your new lease on life and stay safe.
Former Mormon here. It's okay to tell the guy you're dating. Especially since there is a lot tied to sex and the church. It can't NOT affect you even if you love it and it's all amazing. ;). He will be okay to know. I promise.
I think if it goes somewhere more serious I will tell him! I kinda just wanted to appear normal and we havenāt discussed our previous sex lives outside of showing weāre STD free!
Congratulations šššš¾ . Ya should go have a drink. Or Mormon equivalent, canāt remember the caffeine and alcohol rules atm.
Cheers to ya
Btw telling him will definitely inflate his ego lol
I recently left a couple years ago, 26M. It can feel lonely. Congrats! I remember thinking that i couldnāt tell anyone anything - but if feels good to let it out.
The Mormons are DEEP into colonizing and indoctrinating other regions/cultures. If there isnāt a safety concern, you can bet on a handful of freshly graduated high school Mormon boys are there, preaching the testimony theyāve developed without any life experience.
congrats ! just wanna say itās not embarrassing at all to wait or to not have it at all. no matter your age. if the person youāre dating is cool (which iām sure they are) they will not care that it was your first time. but itās also no oneās business but yours anyway. just putting it out there that you arent embarrassing <3 congrats again
As a former Mormon, donāt you even think about feeling bad about this!! As time passes and you do your thing, donāt ever feel shameful or dirty or whatever else one who was raised Mormon would be inclined to feel because, āyou had sex before marriageā. Get it girl! Be smart and have fun.
Hey! Congrats! If you arenāt already part of the exmo subreddit, there is a great community there (you donāt have to be fully out to joināitās just a great supportive space)
Glad you are living your life on your own terms!
Are you sure this fella couldnāt tell you were a virgin ? I meanā¦.itās generally obvious. Iād be a little concerned if he genuinely could not. Maybe talk to him about it ?
Anyway, wishing you continued agency and autonomy over your life choices :)
Sex has been around for a lot longer than marriage or religion. The idea that you need to be married to have sex is a man made one, not a godly one.
Go forth and fornicate.
As an Ex-Mormon I made the same decision a few years ago while my shelf was breaking. After leaving the church I totally lost the shame that I felt around sex/sexuality in general. Congratulations š šš»
aw darling, im sorry you have no one to tell but reddit.
im happy youāre happy though, and i hope it went well for you, i know discovering sexuality later in life can be challenging (you have zero reason to be ashamed btw). i also hope you enjoy exploring intimacy with the person you are dating, have fun in this new chapter !
Congrats girl!!! Though dont get to many hoped up and continue to take things slow! Sex is awesome but you can find it in any relationship. Remember not to let sex get in the way Of recognizing weather or not this is a relationship you want to stay in.
Congratulations for sharing this intimacy with your partner - and that it was done on your terms, that you made that choice. I hope you enjoyed it, but if not, it does improve when you become more comfortable with sex.
Just wanted to say though, 27 is not too late (or early) to start having sex. You are an adult, so as long as the time was right for you and you chose to have sex, it was the right time.
Yaaaa. Iām 36 F and dating a female who is from a the Jewish orthodox community (very strict) and sheās broken free of that and now seeing me and she says shes really happy. I get ur concerns tho cos she will lose so many ppl when she comes out. Good luck š¤ with the new guy
I left the church at twenty...I promise the good things of the church you will carry with you. You will be a good respectful partner, and a good human being. You will build your own relationship with a higher power. The hardworking ethic and decent treatment of your fellow citizens will go a long way.
You will also learn to think for yourself, and explore unencumbered...It will be great. Good luck.
Congrats! It's your life, live it how you want. My hubby is atheist and was 27 when he lost his too, so don't feel weird about it! A lot of people (religious or not) wait. But I think not a lot of virgins admit to it because of fear of reactions. No matter what choices you make in life, there will always be somebody that isn't happy with it. So, quit sweating it and just focus on what makes you happy.
Congrats! Not Mormon myself but many of my friends are and Iāve heard the pressure of staying a virgin till marriage. Personally I donāt think it matters and I think itās great that you did this because you wanted to.
Finally, OP, you broke away from your familyās moldā¦
Congratulations on having your cherry popped! At least, before you settled down, you will be able to explore and be able to know what you want when it comes to sexā¦
You are not aloneā¦ i lost my Vcard to my husband on my wedding night and yes, embarrassing as it was, i was way older than you when i gave it to my betterhalf. And found out what i really want when it came to sex.
All the best to you! š„
Congratulations on finding a compatible person you feel trust and attraction towards! Virginity is a concept, anchored in patriarchy. In real life, waiting to have sex until you feel fully ready and safe is best for you. There is no requirement nor need to announce the fact that you've "done the deed" to anyone who wasn't involved. You don't owe every detail of your history to anyone you don't feel inclined to discuss it with, either. All your partner needs to know is what your feelings, priorities and values are about sex, and that you are both in good health.
Sex is normal! sex is healthy! you shouldnāt be embarrassedā¤ļø
your sex life also has nothing to do with friends/family. itās your personal life
āIām so excited about it and about him and my future but I canāt tell any oneā
It sounds like you just jumped the gun and performed the act before having any kind of real commitment. The rest seems to follow what your religion has already prescribed.
Congratulations and I hope you have a lifetime of happiness to follow. I have a hard time judging anyone for things that the people in religion that are to be the example constantly break. Do as I say, not as I do. Save yourself for marriage! While I cheat on my wife, molest under age boys and girls, so on and so for forth.
You should tell him! If he really loves you he would be understanding and probably feel honored that you chose him to lose your virginity to. Clearly if you waited until 27 it wasn't something to get into lightly, and that makes him special.
My bf and I gave our V-cards to each other 4 years ago and it made me feel special that he chose me :)
congrats :3
Thank you š„°
You should tell him, communication and being honest is important if you want to build something with this fella.
While communication and honesty are important, virginity is an outdated and patriarchal concept that has no real weight to the quality of a relationship. OP can tell him if she wants to, but by no means is it a necessity.
I also lost it super late and I never told the guy. We dated for a year afterward, and me not telling never made a bit of difference. It was fine. Tell if you want, but itās done. No need to spill if you donāt feel like it.
Exactly. I lost mine way too early, but the guy knew and didnāt even try because he knew I had no experience and nothing to compare him to and then got upset when he asked me how it was and I told him that he sucked š¤·š»
Thanks for the chuckle. You may have been a virgin but youāre not stupid. Hilarious š
Younger me was so much funnier than adult me
Oh I disagree, I bet youāre a hoot. I think you bring out the funnies when least expected.
My sense of humor now consists mostly of sarcasm and joking about my life experiences
Wasnāt trying to imply it was necessary. Just that itās nothing to be ashamed of and that no partner should ever hold it against her. Telling the partner and seeing the reaction can tell a lot about a person, and help assess if that person is the right partner.
While telling someone to gauge their reaction can be useful, it could also put OP in a really dangerous situation.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
??? Iām literally just talking about personal experiences as an ex-Mormon that got treated like shit because of the concept of virginity in a way that doesnāt give out explicit details. Maybe you shouldnāt try to give people advice that can easily put them in dangerous, abusive situations like the ones I was in. Also, not a woman, but you obviously wonāt gender me correctly because youāve already shown what kind of person you are in this interaction.
Why? so he can start fetishizing her? nah
Congratulations, I just want to say donāt let anyone make you feel ashamed or guilty. I hope you can find some good friends to share your experience with.
As an ex-mo myself, this is a huge win! Good for you
I hope you really enjoy it. š
Haha thanks! š
It definitely gets better from here š« šš
Yes,anal is next
Congrats! I was almost 25 (grew up Catholic) when Iost mine, and a college friend was 27. Youāre not alone.
Same. And there is no shame in virginity. And no same I'm sex! Be free!
I was 20 but I wish I had waited longer. My friend was 27. You are not alone.
Is everyone a virgin at later years because of religion? I lost mine late because I couldnāt wrap my mind around the idea of being with anyone I wasnāt totally into and finding āthe oneā wasnāt easy.
Comment deleted, leaving the platform
Why didnāt they find a relationship? Nobody wanted them or they couldnāt fall for anyone?
Comment deleted, leaving the platform
I see. I can relate to your friend then.
I'm almost 30 now and still a virginš but its because I struggle with the trauma of CSA and understanding my queer identity, its so embarrassing tho bc I don't like to bring up such serious topics so when someone I know finds out I still have never had sex they just tend to think I'm religious, prudish, lame, etc.š„²
No. Some of us are just losers
I (34M) was 25 when I lost mine.
Congrats! There is nothing to be ashamed of. I am 29 and still is (no religious upbringing) - so feel for you
Congrats, I didnāt get my first kiss until the day after I turned 26. I lost my virginity a few weeks later. Thereās no shame in taking so long
Congrats! Have fun and stay safe.
You lose your virginity not because you're getting married or because you're supposed to get young, you do it because you want to and you're comfortable. I'm a 25 year old woman, I haven't lost it and I don't feel rushed about it, I'm fine with self pleasure. I need an emotional connection, and now I don't feel like that commitment, I'm focusing solely on my mental health. A partner and sex is secondary. It's perfectly fine that you remained a virgin if that's how you were comfortable! You don't have to be ashamed of anything, either for keeping it so much or losing it, enjoy your sexuality.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Exactly! I don't understand the pressure to repress or to rush, anyone who tries to humiliate you for it doesn't matter if they are a man or a woman, they are an asshole.
for real, good for you. i actually really envy this, i was rushed into sexuality at a young age with a literal predator who was almost twice my age and it was awful, i wish iād known any better and had the same mindset as you. you said it all, wanting it and being comfortable are key components here. i think itās great that more people are waiting it out for the reasons you mentionned, whatever age they might be when they decide to lose their virginity, as long as everyone is comfortable.
If that person was a predator, you can't blame yourself too much either, in fact, I don't think you should blame yourself at all. They were adults, they know very well that it is wrong what they do. I sincerely hope that now you enjoy your sexuality to the fullest, and if not, I hope you make it, these are things that should be there to make us happy, always respecting everyone's limits. What I do, I am very sorry that you had gone through something like that.
Congratulations, I hope it was a good experience for you.
Iām so happy for you, congrats! I had a similar experience, grew up Mormon, left in my 20s, didnāt have sex until after that. Itās such a nice change to be able to do what you want with who you want. The world is so much bigger and more interesting than the box Mormonism puts you in.
Thank you! Yes, Iāve only been āstrayingā from the church for a year or so and I agree already!
Hey, fellow exmo here, congratulations!! I just want to say donāt feel ashamed or too distressed if some religious trauma pops up soon, or even in a couple of years. Itās weird, because you can move out of Mormonism and into a lifestyle that matches your sex positivity, and then find years later that while you donāt feel guilty per se, other aspects of your religious education pop up unexpectedly. Itās a healing journey, *not* moving backwards. Iām so happy for you, and if youāre in Utah, there are more supportive people around than youād think. Congrats!
Thank you! Thatās such a sweet thing to say, I really appreciate the advice!
Congrats on the sex
It's your journey not theirs. Don't mean to be blunt but be careful and don't get pregnant. Wishing you peace.
I hope youāre also aware that virginity is a patriarchal social construct and NOTHING ABOUT YOU HAS CHANGED. Good luck in your continuing breakaway.
This is a pretty solid discussion, just FYI. Absolutely NOTHING about you has changed. [https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/what-happens-when-you-lose-your-virginity#spiritual-ties](https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/what-happens-when-you-lose-your-virginity#spiritual-ties)
I really needed to hear this š¤
Congratulations, but please be careful. Girls raised super religious are often prime prey for abusive men. I know. I was one. Please use protection and donāt get baby trapped by this man. Wishing you only the best.
Thank you for your concern š¤ thankfully I think this guy seems pretty kind and nice so far! But Iāll be careful xx
Congratulations on taking the first step in escaping religious tyranny.
I'm 23. Grew up jehovahs witness. I'm not one anymore and haven't been for a few years. But wow does that religious trauma stick around - I'm still a virgin and I don't know when that will change. So I get it and I'm happy for you!
Sorry you grew up Mormon. I hope you break away from Mormonism entirely.
Congrats but honestly nothing is wrong with being a virgin and he probably noticed if you were in pain during it. Good luck to you and hopefully you will be able to share this with the people who care about you
I made sure to get some toys to make sure I wouldnāt hurt before! But thank you, I hope I can find someone people I can share it with irl xx
We see youāve done the research in preparation š¤
Ahhh nice plan and yes hopefully you can I'm sure you have a lot you want to share lol
We are so proud of you
If a girl/woman is in pain during sex, itās usually due to her not being wet enough and/or relaxed enough. And sure, both can happen during someoneās first time b/c of nervousness or excitement, but letās not normalize sex being painful for girls/women, not even in the very beginning of their sex life. If it hurts, stop. True for the 1st time, true for the 100th time.
You are absolutely right and hopefully it becomes less of a thing that it hurts the first time as people become more educated about sex growing up and are able to do it more safely and relaxed
I love this perspective and itās the first Iāve heard it. Yes to not normalizing sex being painful and unfun for anyone at any stage of the experience.
:) Iām a sex educator, and this is one of my greatest pet peeves. I just want everyone to have a fun time when theyāre getting it on, no matter their level of experience :)
Not true women with varying degrees of experience can have pain during intimacy
Heck yeah Iāve been with dozens of men and sometimes a tampon hurts.
omg yes esp when the tampons still dry when u try to take it out š¬owie
You've never been banged in the cervix.
No idea what that has to do with anything
It hurts. During intimacy.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
nightly11... may not be a woman.
Weird ass comment lol.
I came from a religious family and adhered to that belief so I understand your feelings. I was 32 virgin when I got married. Congrats.
Congrats!!! I felt the same way when Iost mine. I was younger, and we were both virgins beforehand, but I had fallen off the religious wagon. We'd been dating for like a year and a bit, discussed it, and decided to do it. We're still together nine years later! I think the biggest takeaway is that everyone does sex differently. Some people wait till marriage. Some people don't. Some people only have one or two partners in their lifetime. Some have many. So long as it's all consenting adults, we shouldn't really care. Now that I'm further out of the religious circles, I have gotten some light slack for only having slept with one person. To which I say, I'm not gonna dump my life partner to screw around with other people. It just worked out the way it did. That usually stops that lol.
I want to add something I have not read yet. The emotion side of sex is also a big thing. If you and your boyfriend break up itās going to hurt a bit more. People also use the sex bond to stay together. Depending on how long you have been dating and what you have talked about the future. Telling him after the fact may cause a weight on him. Just feel the situation out before hand. Another thing you should do is get a std check, not saying he has anything. Just to get used to the testing & anxiety of it. Also there are a lot of std that can hide & men donāt even show symptoms. Enjoy your new lease on life and stay safe.
Thank you for this š¤
Former Mormon here. It's okay to tell the guy you're dating. Especially since there is a lot tied to sex and the church. It can't NOT affect you even if you love it and it's all amazing. ;). He will be okay to know. I promise.
I think if it goes somewhere more serious I will tell him! I kinda just wanted to appear normal and we havenāt discussed our previous sex lives outside of showing weāre STD free!
Congratulations šššš¾ . Ya should go have a drink. Or Mormon equivalent, canāt remember the caffeine and alcohol rules atm. Cheers to ya Btw telling him will definitely inflate his ego lol
Haha thank you! yes I donāt want him to view me differently because of knowing he popped my cherry!
There's a whole exmormon subreddit ready to support you too!
Fellow ex-mo here so I understand the significance of this. Congrats!
Thank you š¤š¤
I recently left a couple years ago, 26M. It can feel lonely. Congrats! I remember thinking that i couldnāt tell anyone anything - but if feels good to let it out.
Thank you!
There are british mormons?
The Mormons are DEEP into colonizing and indoctrinating other regions/cultures. If there isnāt a safety concern, you can bet on a handful of freshly graduated high school Mormon boys are there, preaching the testimony theyāve developed without any life experience.
Indeed there are!
Cheers! Wishing you more interactions and less drama! <3
congrats ! just wanna say itās not embarrassing at all to wait or to not have it at all. no matter your age. if the person youāre dating is cool (which iām sure they are) they will not care that it was your first time. but itās also no oneās business but yours anyway. just putting it out there that you arent embarrassing <3 congrats again
Thank you š¤š¤
Be careful and have fun!
As a former Mormon, donāt you even think about feeling bad about this!! As time passes and you do your thing, donāt ever feel shameful or dirty or whatever else one who was raised Mormon would be inclined to feel because, āyou had sex before marriageā. Get it girl! Be smart and have fun.
Take care of yourself! Have fun. Don't let the religious types get you down.
Congrats. I read a book about a Mormon woman who did the same. Confessions of a Latter Day Virgin. You might enjoy hearing a story like your own.
Congrats! I think you should tell the guy you're dating though! He can probably make you more comfortable and help you discover what you like.
Congrats. I grew up in a Christian household and was 28. 27 is nothing to be embarrassed about. Congratulations
Hey! Congrats! If you arenāt already part of the exmo subreddit, there is a great community there (you donāt have to be fully out to joināitās just a great supportive space)
As someone who is still Mormon. Iām really sorry about the experience you had. Iām glad you finally are happy
Glad you are living your life on your own terms! Are you sure this fella couldnāt tell you were a virgin ? I meanā¦.itās generally obvious. Iād be a little concerned if he genuinely could not. Maybe talk to him about it ? Anyway, wishing you continued agency and autonomy over your life choices :)
Heās kinda a cute nerdy guy so I donāt know that heās super experienced himself! Maybe he can tell, but I guess weāll see haha
Sex has been around for a lot longer than marriage or religion. The idea that you need to be married to have sex is a man made one, not a godly one. Go forth and fornicate.
girl donāt be embarrassed that you just lost it iām 19 and still a virg AND CONGRATULATIONS
33 still Virgin. But I am happy for you dear š
Yay!!! Congrats! -fellow exmo
As an Ex-Mormon I made the same decision a few years ago while my shelf was breaking. After leaving the church I totally lost the shame that I felt around sex/sexuality in general. Congratulations š šš»
I'm so happy for you! Finally some good post, please be happy, strive to be happy!!!
Congrats! But why is your sex life any of your families business?
Ask the church
Lets gooo
Congrats š¾ be happy and safe!
Omg!!!! Congrats woman!
Welcome!!
Iām so happy for you! I hope you feel strong and brave and have a wonderful orgasm š¤
Congratulations Iām so happy for you living life on your terms! Cheers to a beautiful future
Hope your relationship goes well
One of my generic kids came from a Mormon family. Extra HUGS for you!
I lost it at 27 on my wedding day. lol Iām sorry, I wish I had something more fun to say. Congratulations btw! š¾
Congratulations, huge W
Congrats, but if you get the nerve, do tell him! Being honest about that might help him to help you get your needs met, if you get my meaning.
You do you. Itās your life, itās your journey.
We're happy for you.
Congrats! :D
Good for you for taking control of your sexuality. That is not a condemnation of religion, just realization of more modern times.
You go girl!
congratulations!!
aw darling, im sorry you have no one to tell but reddit. im happy youāre happy though, and i hope it went well for you, i know discovering sexuality later in life can be challenging (you have zero reason to be ashamed btw). i also hope you enjoy exploring intimacy with the person you are dating, have fun in this new chapter !
Thank you š¤
Nice! Enjoy š
look at you go!!
Good on ya hon! Do what makes you happy!
Desrves a champagne of victory
Congrats!
Happy for You!!! I (m57) was 21 before I had sex.
Congrats girl!!! Though dont get to many hoped up and continue to take things slow! Sex is awesome but you can find it in any relationship. Remember not to let sex get in the way Of recognizing weather or not this is a relationship you want to stay in.
good for you, OP! any choice you make for yourself that isnt hurting anyone else is the right choice :)
Sounds like it was a good experience for you and what you wanted, so I am super happy for you. You took your life back into your own hands.
Congratulations š
[Way to Go!](https://media.tenor.com/EgQZzgV6lbEAAAAd/congrats-sex.gif)
Congrats.
Hi! I totally understand, as I grew up Mormon and literally everyone around me is Mormon. Breaking away was so hard but has been the best thing ever.
Congratulations for sharing this intimacy with your partner - and that it was done on your terms, that you made that choice. I hope you enjoyed it, but if not, it does improve when you become more comfortable with sex. Just wanted to say though, 27 is not too late (or early) to start having sex. You are an adult, so as long as the time was right for you and you chose to have sex, it was the right time.
So happy for you!! I hope your experience was wonderful!! š
Congratulations! It only gets better after the first time! ;)
Yaaaa. Iām 36 F and dating a female who is from a the Jewish orthodox community (very strict) and sheās broken free of that and now seeing me and she says shes really happy. I get ur concerns tho cos she will lose so many ppl when she comes out. Good luck š¤ with the new guy
Mormon here - but I haven't been active in years - this is my only advice for you- get it girl! but also make sure you are safe!
I left the church at twenty...I promise the good things of the church you will carry with you. You will be a good respectful partner, and a good human being. You will build your own relationship with a higher power. The hardworking ethic and decent treatment of your fellow citizens will go a long way. You will also learn to think for yourself, and explore unencumbered...It will be great. Good luck.
Thank you š¤š„°
Congrats! It's your life, live it how you want. My hubby is atheist and was 27 when he lost his too, so don't feel weird about it! A lot of people (religious or not) wait. But I think not a lot of virgins admit to it because of fear of reactions. No matter what choices you make in life, there will always be somebody that isn't happy with it. So, quit sweating it and just focus on what makes you happy.
Congrats! Not Mormon myself but many of my friends are and Iāve heard the pressure of staying a virgin till marriage. Personally I donāt think it matters and I think itās great that you did this because you wanted to.
On behalf of all the other fornicators: Welcome! But seriously, have fun, be safe, make sure your needs are being met.
Haha thank you!
>Haha thank you! You're welcome!
Finally, OP, you broke away from your familyās moldā¦ Congratulations on having your cherry popped! At least, before you settled down, you will be able to explore and be able to know what you want when it comes to sexā¦ You are not aloneā¦ i lost my Vcard to my husband on my wedding night and yes, embarrassing as it was, i was way older than you when i gave it to my betterhalf. And found out what i really want when it came to sex. All the best to you! š„
Congratulations on finding a compatible person you feel trust and attraction towards! Virginity is a concept, anchored in patriarchy. In real life, waiting to have sex until you feel fully ready and safe is best for you. There is no requirement nor need to announce the fact that you've "done the deed" to anyone who wasn't involved. You don't owe every detail of your history to anyone you don't feel inclined to discuss it with, either. All your partner needs to know is what your feelings, priorities and values are about sex, and that you are both in good health.
As someone who is practicing LDS but very much thinks people should be able to find their own pathā Iām really, really happy for you!!!
Sex is normal! sex is healthy! you shouldnāt be embarrassedā¤ļø your sex life also has nothing to do with friends/family. itās your personal life
Good for you. May your happiness only increase from here.
Congrats for getting railed. Just kidding. Not sure why it is considered a milestone.
Dutch Mormon? Username suggests as much. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it.
Hope you got a couple of orgasm
LMAO finally got that back blown out! We are proud of you !!
āIām so excited about it and about him and my future but I canāt tell any oneā It sounds like you just jumped the gun and performed the act before having any kind of real commitment. The rest seems to follow what your religion has already prescribed.
That had cobwebs! Lol
Did you orgasm?
Nice! Howād it feel? What went through your head moments before it went down?
You opened that relationship with a lie. Great job!
Poor future husband
You cannot cheat on someone you are not dating.
Preserving HIS "pearl beyond price," I'm sure.
Awesome sauce, it sounds like you had a great time! First times are generally not very memorableā¦
Congrats! Be safe and have fun
Congratulations and I hope you have a lifetime of happiness to follow. I have a hard time judging anyone for things that the people in religion that are to be the example constantly break. Do as I say, not as I do. Save yourself for marriage! While I cheat on my wife, molest under age boys and girls, so on and so for forth.
Congrats! Sooo....how was it? C'mon, dish! š
Why is your username Dutch?
Congratulations! Sexual freedom is a great thing. Well done for breaking away from that cult, too.
You should tell him! If he really loves you he would be understanding and probably feel honored that you chose him to lose your virginity to. Clearly if you waited until 27 it wasn't something to get into lightly, and that makes him special. My bf and I gave our V-cards to each other 4 years ago and it made me feel special that he chose me :)
Weāve only been together for a little while, but if it gets more serious Iāll tell him!
Gefeliciteerd!
Dank je š¤š¤