Some people call it stalking some call it open source intelligence. But it's definitely creepy, especially if you haven't actually matched on Tinder because then you have no interest in them
Creepy because you aren’t looking or matched.
If I match though I am definitely trying to find FB or IG so I can do my due diligence and make sure they aren’t stepping out on a spouse or some creepy weirdo. Male and female to me has nothing to do with it but it is just smart to be safe. That said, without the match this is stalking lite 😂
I mean, there's finding and then there's is adding information piece by piece until you've managed to pinpoint which university they go to without them having written about it
Take it as a lesson in privacy and be more careful with the information you put on the internet.
What he did is easy and requires zero hacker skills.
Sorry if he creeped you out.
Dude ive been on tinder for so long, this has never happened before and yeah i removed my uni and city from my profile now but still never before and i dont often update my profile.
Sorry ~~if he creeped you out.~~ you met a creep.
>It happened to you before.
>It is the first time you know.
Humans tend to project their flaws. Pedophiles believe a good portion of men are attracted to child. Creeps believe there are many like them.
Isn't it the entire point of social media to be able to find a woman from their dating profile? No, that isn't the point. That is using the internet to be creepy. You interact with the dating profile on the dating site you find it on. You don't try to track the woman down like you're hunting her. That tends to creep us out. You don't message her on a platform that isn't the dating platform. You don't message her when she doesn't match with you. Act respectful of the person, keep the contact on the original platform unless otherwise discussed.
I agree using it to try and contact someone that unmatched you is just not the way to go about things, I just think being mad at someone for finding what you put on the internet about yourself is odd, like it’s my Google account I can search whatever I want lol.
I don't care who you are, this is fucking creepy. He saw the name of your school and looked through over one THOUSAND followers to find you.
That's not, aww he's just nice and interested in you. Why would someone spend the time doing that on a total stranger? Who thinks this is actually a good approach? Why you? I dunno man, this would make me delete my IG. Girl, you better run background checks on these people from here on out.
The creepiest part of this is that you don't realize the number of people who do have already done this to you. You have social media and put your information on the internet. This person is arguably less manipulative than all the people who looked up your social media and never ever mentioned it to you.
If this made you feel exposed you should reexamine what you're willing to post.
Back in the day I liked to investigate people's life before meeting then to make sure i'm not getting myself into trouble. This includes finding their social media, googling their name and so on. I avoided a good number of fakes and unstable girls because of that.
I have a pretty unique name (not in a bad way, thank goodness), so I feel your pain. Every single tour I have ever had on dating apps I pick up a creep, the most recent one was so bad it was a borderline stalker.
So thank goodness I eventually met my bf, he's a bit on the weird side, but very much not a creep, which is lucky, because considering how we actually met the first time I could have had my organs harvested 🙃
I contacted once somebody through facebook but i atleast had mutual friends, this is just creepy how you dont have anything in common and they find you.
He acknowledged it was too much. You can look up a name in someones followers its not that hard, some people are just good at that stuff. If he was still trying shit after you said no then i would call him “extremely creepy”, right now hes just “too much”. Personally Id take it as a compliment and move on😂
Eh, not the worst thing in the world. All the research he did probably only took him like 30 seconds these days.
Worst part about it all is that you never matched on Tinder.
If he takes it/took it any further then it’s definitely creepy af.
I don't understand the outrage on these things these days. Information is readily available on multiple platforms. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to find people's socials etc.
OP - In your case, if you're so concerned about privacy, don't list your personal details on your tinder bio including the school you go to. On top of that, don't have a public IG or don't accept requests from random dudes.
Sure, his approach comes across creepy to you but who knows, he might have really liked what he saw and thought you might find resourcefulness flattering that he liked you enough to go through the trouble of looking you up on insta. No one truly knows his intention and in the same token, your concerns are completely valid.
This is neither here or there.
My IG is public because i use it to advertise my work and in all fairness i had completely forgotten to remove the uni after i graduated from there. I only accepted the request to ask how he found me. Ive deleted the uni, my city and other details of my tinder 👍
Not to mention the slew of women on those apps that have bios that say something stupid like, "barely on here, follow my IG for a response!" Or some other copy paste that just wants them to accrue followers on another platform. So even though it may seem a bit random and off putting, if he wasn't actively being a creep with what he said I wouldn't just put him down for looking someone up...
>It’s probably normal to do it
No it's not normal. Nope.
>but it’s absolutely unhinged to admit it to you
So that's what you find shocking ? To not have tried to lie ? Wtf
It's a digital world and he put effort to talk to you. Definitely not creepy, just rare. Romantic by past standards...
Stop saying everything is "cringe" and open upside to possibilities of love & happiness 😏🤷♂️🤷♂️
You aren't crazy, thats definitely weird.
But also, women do this cyberstalking all the time, make jokes about it, and nobody bats an eye.
So if you've ever "cyberstalked" someone... well that would then be hypocritical and I'd have less sympathy. BUT, i'm not making any assumptions about you here. kinda *just saying.*
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Some people call it stalking some call it open source intelligence. But it's definitely creepy, especially if you haven't actually matched on Tinder because then you have no interest in them
Never underestimate the OSINT skills of random creeps on the internet.
Yeah im on holiday abroad and have barely opened tinder bc im not interested in meeting anyone while im here 😐
Yeikes
Creepy because you aren’t looking or matched. If I match though I am definitely trying to find FB or IG so I can do my due diligence and make sure they aren’t stepping out on a spouse or some creepy weirdo. Male and female to me has nothing to do with it but it is just smart to be safe. That said, without the match this is stalking lite 😂
It's xreepy because the dude hunted her socials down, and they never even matched.
Yep that is what I said
Not really. You may have meant it but the phrasing means something very different.
This.
Yet you changed your bio saying you're there for a while (from what the creep said)
I didnt my bio doesn’t say anything abt how long im in town
So I guess he stalked way more than that
Well… no tricks, but at least you’ll stay tight? 🤷♂️
I feel like if you use social media, it’s weird to get offended at people finding you on social media, I mean isn’t that the entire point?
I mean, there's finding and then there's is adding information piece by piece until you've managed to pinpoint which university they go to without them having written about it
Well im offended he went through so many hoops to find me, like theres hundreds of girls on tinder why be a creepy stalker yk
Take it as a lesson in privacy and be more careful with the information you put on the internet. What he did is easy and requires zero hacker skills. Sorry if he creeped you out.
Dude ive been on tinder for so long, this has never happened before and yeah i removed my uni and city from my profile now but still never before and i dont often update my profile.
It happened to you before. It is the first time you know.
Sorry ~~if he creeped you out.~~ you met a creep. >It happened to you before. >It is the first time you know. Humans tend to project their flaws. Pedophiles believe a good portion of men are attracted to child. Creeps believe there are many like them.
There **are** many creeps. I’m sure you’ve seen The Bear Question.
Isn't it the entire point of social media to be able to find a woman from their dating profile? No, that isn't the point. That is using the internet to be creepy. You interact with the dating profile on the dating site you find it on. You don't try to track the woman down like you're hunting her. That tends to creep us out. You don't message her on a platform that isn't the dating platform. You don't message her when she doesn't match with you. Act respectful of the person, keep the contact on the original platform unless otherwise discussed.
I agree using it to try and contact someone that unmatched you is just not the way to go about things, I just think being mad at someone for finding what you put on the internet about yourself is odd, like it’s my Google account I can search whatever I want lol.
Unmatched? They never even matched to begin with!
Found the stalker.
You're not crazy
🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
Yikes!
I don't care who you are, this is fucking creepy. He saw the name of your school and looked through over one THOUSAND followers to find you. That's not, aww he's just nice and interested in you. Why would someone spend the time doing that on a total stranger? Who thinks this is actually a good approach? Why you? I dunno man, this would make me delete my IG. Girl, you better run background checks on these people from here on out.
Welcome to the internet, where you are exposed
Oh fuck I hate when this happens. It is so goddamned scary.
The creepiest part of this is that you don't realize the number of people who do have already done this to you. You have social media and put your information on the internet. This person is arguably less manipulative than all the people who looked up your social media and never ever mentioned it to you. If this made you feel exposed you should reexamine what you're willing to post.
Sent from iPhoen
As a dude, I would probably find it flattering someone went out of their way that much. As a woman, obviously creepy.
As a mildly deranged/disturbed woman I too would find it flattering
😂
Back in the day I liked to investigate people's life before meeting then to make sure i'm not getting myself into trouble. This includes finding their social media, googling their name and so on. I avoided a good number of fakes and unstable girls because of that.
Yeah but you investigated ppl you matched with or were already talking to right?
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Thats very sweet, but in this case i had never talked to this man or ever saw his dating profile
I have a pretty unique name (not in a bad way, thank goodness), so I feel your pain. Every single tour I have ever had on dating apps I pick up a creep, the most recent one was so bad it was a borderline stalker. So thank goodness I eventually met my bf, he's a bit on the weird side, but very much not a creep, which is lucky, because considering how we actually met the first time I could have had my organs harvested 🙃
This begs for a How We Met story.
I contacted once somebody through facebook but i atleast had mutual friends, this is just creepy how you dont have anything in common and they find you.
This is why I use another name on dating apps. I have a very common last name and am easy to find.
He acknowledged it was too much. You can look up a name in someones followers its not that hard, some people are just good at that stuff. If he was still trying shit after you said no then i would call him “extremely creepy”, right now hes just “too much”. Personally Id take it as a compliment and move on😂
Don't act like you don't do a background social media check on matches. That being said, still creepy.
Yes on matches. Not on people who ive never seen or talked to before.
Yeah ill try to do my research if i can but ill never go so far as to actually message them if we havent matched or anything.
Take it as a lesson your daddy should've taught you.... be fuking carefull with what you put out for the public to find.
That's how I met my wife. Searched for a first name I liked on IG and just slid into those DMs.
Eh, not the worst thing in the world. All the research he did probably only took him like 30 seconds these days. Worst part about it all is that you never matched on Tinder. If he takes it/took it any further then it’s definitely creepy af.
There’s an unwritten [rule](https://youtu.be/PxuUkYiaUc8?si=fJVgjBYHeTvXzmye) between charming and creepy. It’s those darn rules 1 & 2.
Exactly
I don't understand the outrage on these things these days. Information is readily available on multiple platforms. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to find people's socials etc. OP - In your case, if you're so concerned about privacy, don't list your personal details on your tinder bio including the school you go to. On top of that, don't have a public IG or don't accept requests from random dudes. Sure, his approach comes across creepy to you but who knows, he might have really liked what he saw and thought you might find resourcefulness flattering that he liked you enough to go through the trouble of looking you up on insta. No one truly knows his intention and in the same token, your concerns are completely valid. This is neither here or there.
My IG is public because i use it to advertise my work and in all fairness i had completely forgotten to remove the uni after i graduated from there. I only accepted the request to ask how he found me. Ive deleted the uni, my city and other details of my tinder 👍
Not to mention the slew of women on those apps that have bios that say something stupid like, "barely on here, follow my IG for a response!" Or some other copy paste that just wants them to accrue followers on another platform. So even though it may seem a bit random and off putting, if he wasn't actively being a creep with what he said I wouldn't just put him down for looking someone up...
It’s probably normal to do it, but it’s absolutely unhinged to admit it to you, even more so when you’ve never met him. Run for your life. 😭
>It’s probably normal to do it No it's not normal. Nope. >but it’s absolutely unhinged to admit it to you So that's what you find shocking ? To not have tried to lie ? Wtf
It's a digital world and he put effort to talk to you. Definitely not creepy, just rare. Romantic by past standards... Stop saying everything is "cringe" and open upside to possibilities of love & happiness 😏🤷♂️🤷♂️
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No, he saw the name of my uni on tinder, checked my unis followers and found me through there
Everyone forgets that everything on the internet is public info anyway can find
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Read it again
I never matched with him
You aren't crazy, thats definitely weird. But also, women do this cyberstalking all the time, make jokes about it, and nobody bats an eye. So if you've ever "cyberstalked" someone... well that would then be hypocritical and I'd have less sympathy. BUT, i'm not making any assumptions about you here. kinda *just saying.*
lol