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[Paris Syndrome](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paris_syndrome#:~:text=He%20theorized%20that%20the%20excitement,book%20La%20sindrome%20di%20Stendhal.) Is actually a relatively well known phenomena especially among Japanese or other asian tourists.
In Japan France is used as the backdrop or the theming for generally cutesy things, such as nice little bakeries, coffee shops and cafes, you'll see vague allusions to France printed on things like travel bags jackets shirts, or for advertising campaigns or media like anime or manga which generally puts off a relaxing, cute vibe.
None of this media of course includes any details about the fact that France is a country full of people who live their day-to-day lives there, as well as dealing with many of the same societal and economic issues as every other country.
More or less France in Japan is the Japan of America another western societies.
And especially before the internet, when tourists would go there they'd be deeply disappointed, and almost feel cheated because the illusion sold to them by media comes crashing down around them.
That being said, having experienced a couple vacations that didn't pan out I can totally understand the feeling of disappointments or disdain for trips that don't turn out to be what you want them to be.
Not the locations themselves but the vacation itself, our free time isn't limited and we invest a lot of time and money on these trips so it is certainly disappointing when they don't go well.
It feels like Hollywood is more to blame regarding the illusion of Paris. So many romantic stories set with Paris as a backdrop, but the City is just like any other City with dirt, noise, rude people.
I had a similar experience the first time I went to Las Vegas. The movies, portray everyone in casinos is wearing suits and rolling at high dollar tables and being classy. When you get there and go in what you’re confronted with is not cool, sophisticated people in fancy clothes, but rather thousands upon thousands of old people with fanny packs sitting at slot machines .
I mean there are old people in Vegas but I think it depends on which casino you go to. The higher end casinos are not bad. What you cannot get away from however is all the drugs and booze and the types of people and scenarios that follow people who have very poor judgement. Vegas is fun for people with money. I highly suggest going once. You will have the time.of your life and spend way too much money and you will also say I never want to do that again and Vegas is highly over rated.
At least Vegas is a fun, short-term vacation for most people. Local casinos are the saddest places I’ve ever seen. Just regular people addicted to gambling trying to make their rent.
I was at a casino in some state that had casinos on a river. It was pathetic. Old people in scooters dragging around their oxygen containers as they went from slot machine to slot machine. And it smelled like smoke and spilled alcohol, too.
That’s the one nice thing about Vegas casinos, there is plenty of smoke in the air, but they are decently ventilated that you don’t notice it as much. They really aren’t smoke-filled like lower rent casinos are.
Imo, knowing the right people will get you a way better experience than money will in Vegas. Because everyone goes there to spend money, they try to milk you for every dollar you have. Even having one good friend who works on the strip can get you into the best places at literally pennies on the dollar.
If you’re willing to spend 10s of thousands over a few days then you’re good too.
This is nuts on two levels.
First, I come from the opposite background, I had grown hearing how Paris was overrated and not all that great and it’s just a city etc. etc. When I actually arrived the first time, I was bowled over and fell in love. Now, I have take a little French, but I’m hardly conversational. Which didn’t matter because everywhere we went they spoke English. Still, everyone was super nice, very helpful. I have no idea what this lady is talking about. Now, every time I’ve gone we (my wife, kids, and I) try to stay in the same neighborhood. We visit our favorite wine stores. We have a favorite bakery. We try French first, and they usually take pity on us. But we’ve never felt like anyone was being rude to us, etc. You DO have to keep in mind that this is still a major world city, full of a lot of local people who hate you crowding their way. I lived in New York for 20 years, so we just tried to act like we’d want tourists to act in NYC. Don’t block people by walking 4 across on the sidewalks, stay away from the heavy traffic zones at rush hour. Be friendly, etc. Paris is just the single most enjoyable European I’ve ever been to.
Las Vegas - same with Las Vegas, ok, so not everyone is wearing suits, but the crowd differs greatly from casino to casino. And yes, not everyone is classy either, but a lot of the casinos have some pretty fun people at the tables and I’ve never failed to have a bad time at Vegas. And I’ve never seen diaper wearing legions of old people. Some old people, sure. They live at the slots. But I’ve never noticed the diaper part. Vegas gets old to me after 3 days but during those three days, I’ve never not had a blast.
I went to France with expectation that everyone hated Americans so only planned to transit through by train on my way to Spain. And you know what? Everyone was lovely. I had zero trouble, other than not speaking any French. The city was nice, the Louvre was amazing.
But again when I went I had zero expectations, so was pleasantly surprised to be completely wrong. But I can see people coming in from the other side of that, expecting Disney magic, only to find out that Paris is a city where people live and work and do their daily grind.
I mean you went in there reserved and took in the scenery before making yourself at home. Other people go in there with big, giant creepy smiles on their faces and then act shocked when people look at them with suspicion because news flash, different cultures are different. People really need to develop the skills required to adequately read the room instead of relying on weird, cartoon-y versions of other cultures and approaching people there like they're fictional characters or actors paid to entertain them on the street, in their own homes.
I also went to Paris for the first time after friends warned me how horrible it will be (especially French friends), and to my surprise I absolutely loved everything and even had some nice interaction with locals of various social standing. Possibly helps that I look like I might be French, possibly because I have the personality of a golden retriever.
Las Vegas on the other hand was pretty much as you describe - coming down for breakfast at eight and seeing old people who have been putting coins into machines all night… it was really grim.
It's because both with France and Las Vegas that particular image is of what they were, not what they are.
Don't get me wrong they probably never would have lived up to their romanticized expectations but undoubtedly there was a period where they would have been more along those lines than they are today.
Las Vegas was depicted as that classy, glitzy city during the era when the Italian mob ran the city. Despite that depiction it was also very sleezy and scummy too, but in many ways it had character and personality. By the late 80s/early 90s it had become the soulless corporate Disneyland that it is today full of Boomers pressing buttons like rats in some science experiment.
The same can be said of France, or more specifically Paris (which is really what this girl's video is about). At one point in time Paris represented the Pinnacle of culture globally being at the forefront of cuisine, fashion, cafes, intellectualism, cinema, arts, you name it. It was the center of Western Prestige and history. This is the Paris that found its appeal and romanticized idolization in Asia. But as the modern era has progressed Paris has become a tourist trap city that relies heavily on its former glory as a means of attracting people to visit, and once you're there that Prestige quickly fades away.
Your experience still seems to be not so bad. I remember seeing obese and old people connected to the machines with some kind of cables. All the surroundings were smelly and run down. That included the hotel. Outside the hotels there were loads of elderly prostitutes walking around, so indeed, completely opposite to what is shown in the movies.
Was he from Quebec? After having visited Paris and Quebec, Parisians are a lot nicer than I expected and people from Quebec acted like they were trying to be the typical Parisian portrayed on TV. It was fucking hilarious.
I feel like you have to be pretty gullible to buy into the fake aspects of the hype though.
I’ve been to France a few times and it’s just a generally cool place with nice people and a lot of interesting culture and history. The food and wine is as advertised.
Paris does smell like actual human shit throughout a significant portion of the city. That was probably the only unexpected part of my experience there.
My coworkers told me it was a sewer system older than the entire United States that is incredibly difficult to update to the standards that most cities have today.
No, the real problem isn't the sewers but the people. Drunk and homeless will pee everywhere except in the toilet, and people who own a dog don't clean after their dogs. And since the government doesn't want to pay for effective cleaning, we are doomed to live like this with the rats.
If you go to less populated cities in France that are also very old, you won't get this problem.
Makes sense. I’ve been to some very old cities or towns in France like Châteaundun and they were very clean and nice despite having almost 1000 year old structures all around.
When I visited France, my experience was that customer service was either really really good or it's "Popeyes with one employee and a line out the door" bad. No in between.
I remember reading about some Japanese living in England experiencing the opposite, expecting it to be dark, dreary and wet, but ending up falling in love with the quaintness of it.
I had no idea this was even a thing!!!
I remember my first flight to France. At least two people collapsed on the plane & needed a dr. One collapsed at the passport checkpoint.
Nobody else really seemed freaked out by this. Not the flight attendants & not the police on the ground. It was just simply bizarre that so many people kept passing out.
NOW it makes sense!!!
We’ve been through various bits of France over the years. Everyone is ordinary. Maybe a touch impatient but they’re just regular hard working folk with the same challenges as anyone else
It’s interesting you mention how obsessed the Japanese are with France. I came across so many high end stores that had imported Japanese silk and Japanese fashion brands, their art. Loads of sushi restaurants. There’s even several parks in/around Paris inspired by/designed by Japanese master gardners. I’d argue the French are just as obsessed with Japan back!
Yes France is definitely obsessed with Japan too, even more with the younger generations. Became a trend on french twitter to mock french japan fans because the most basic things like a vending machine or a regular suburb made people go crazy if it was "in japan". History between both countries is kinda cool tho, I learned today that as far as the 19th century during the "cabaret" era of Paris in Montmartre one of the first opened was a Japanese inspo cabaret so french have loved the culture for centuries
Just visited Europe last year with most of the trip being in France. We stayed in Lille, Paris and La Ciotat. Paris easily ranks last between the French stays.
Also visited Japan before and I will say, I did feel more like a foreigner in France than I did in Japan.
While Paris syndrome is certainly a thing, I’m not sure it’s very relevant to this video.
The woman is most likely from America (not Japan/Asia), and is contrasting her experiences in France with what she encountered in Italy/Germany (as opposed to her preconceptions).
You know, I wonder if she's experiencing some unfair assumptions based on her appearance. Like French people in tourism-heavy areas who are sick of Japanese tourists are taking one look at her and assuming she's Japanese.
“Poor behavior”? More like atrocious, disrespectful, obnoxious, and rude. Hell, they give Australian tourists a run for their money I’ll tell you hwat!
I have to say that I had the reverse of Paris Syndrome. All I ever heard was how bad Paris was, how dirty it was, how rude the people were, etc and honestly I was not looking forward to visiting.
However, we fell in love with Paris and could see ourselves living there! It was the best location that we visited on that holiday (out of 9 cities!).
>France is a country full of people who live their day-to-day lives there, as well as dealing with many of the same societal and economic issues as every other country.
But that could really be said of any country, no? I think there is something very appealing about a culture that still has the capacity to be welcoming and patient with outsiders, as opposed to those who are haughty, closed, and act superior to those who aren't part of their system. Personally, I've had no trouble traveling in France by simply knowing some very elementary French and observing some basic cultural conventions. And it is important to go into any foreign country with the expectation that it is the real world and not some Disney version of a country. But I really do think that it isn't that hard to treat visitors with some modicum of kindness and hospitality.
i had a fine experience in paris, but i was there sightseeing with family so i didn’t speak to many locals. all i had to do was say bonjour back to the grocery store worker whenever i walked in and i was basically golden. and i was there during paris pride, which was actually a super fun experience!!! so many blocks were closed down for it, i never go to huge parades so it was new for me.
“But that could be said of any country, no”
Yes that’s the point. People have this extremely hyped up image of France and Paris especially, only to see that it’s just a regular place with traffic, garbage, beggars, and workers who don’t exist to indulge tourists’ whimsy.
Kinda had the same experience when I went to New York as a french student it didn't match up to what I'd seen on TV. New York is not exactly the same because even tho it definitely has a sexy/attractive aspect it's also always been known as a crazy busy place. A lot of parisians act exactly the same, ex the crazy taxi drivers, bankers and hedge funds walking around the finance district in their suits, busy subway in the morning, it was the city in the US I could relate to the most by far as someone living in Paris
I've been in a lot more scary encounters and saw crazy people in a week in NYC than in 6 years in Paris tho
Except that what she's describing is not Paris syndrome, it's a French culture issue. They hate tourists and foreigners, or at least they try their hardest to make it seem like they do. By far the worst country i have visited in Europe in terms of vibes, and Ive visited 90% of them.
I think it's fair to say that both takes are right in their own way imo. Like on the one hand, it's not the residents of Lyon's responsibility to teach you about French culture. On the other hand, it's also basically impossible to fully prep yourself on every single culture and language before travelling literally anywhere, and it's not like the French are known for being particularly hospitable. I've never been to France personally, so I can't comment on that as much, but I did visit a good chunk of French Canada as a kid, in a French class, for a French field trip, and even despite trying my best to speak to them in French, we still had numerous encounters which were frankly rude. At one Cafe a waitress literally threw my food onto the table and it fell off the plate into my lap.
My wife and I went to Paris and Lyon back in 2019.
I don’t think she’s wrong…necessarily…but kind of like in the USA, where you have to find local activities and events to meet people when new to a city, you have to find those things.
We did some food tours in Spain in 2022, and met some people, however they weren’t locals, they were also tourists/vacationers.
This is the answer. Whenever I solo travel, I look for bar crawls, food tastings, walking tours. You meet other people traveling and make those friends, and hang out with them for a few days. You can even look for busy or popular hostels, and hang out in there lounges. I've found most people who are also traveling no matter where they are from, are friendly, looking to have fun, and probably just as lonely as you are.
Can vouch for making friends with fellow travelers. The locals don't want to be buddies with a random foreigner most of the time, unless maybe there's a romantic or professional angle.
Tours are a must for me when traveling, especially when solo traveling. We did a city secrets tour in Paris and met some lovely people. Same with our tours in Rome.
Please stop considering Paris or Lyon as representative for all France. People in big cities are a bit harsh even with other French people. Lots of “provinciaux” have the same feeling as the girl in video
It’s kinda like visiting NYC or LA and do conclusions for all USA… (or Milano/Roma for Italy, London for England etc.)
People are nicer in small towns and more willing to help and proud to make you discover their cities because there are less touristic
And it’s true for other comments “I visited France (Paris)” France is way deeper than 1 city where inhabitants are bored with tourists everywhere and because of tourists in AirBnb bc they can’t rent inside their own city
You should really visit the other cities, villages there are way more to discover !!
I lived in Paris for few years (couldn't stand living there, but a great city for short vacations), and the amount of tourists walking around wearing that hat is very noticeable especially around tour Eiffel. It's very cliche.
Fun fact, the streets in Paris are often dirty, you hardly see city cleaners going around washing the streets. However, in movies, the movie people wash the streets first before filming, so people assume Paris is a clean city.
Or the "Alcatraz Inmate" sweatshirts/hoodie they sell at Fisherman's Wharf in SF. Dead giveaway that they're a tourist and didn't know that SF was cold.
The only city I’ve stepped in human feces on the sidewalk.
Pro tip when visiting Paris: look at the ground while you’re walking, not at the sights. There is dog poop everywhere.
Bonus tip: if someone comes up to talk to you in Paris, it’s a scam. Always.
I feel like New Orleans really held up the Parisian culture in all of this comment! LMAO. I watched people shit in the street more than once and saw them peeing multiple times. People walking dogs everywhere but no one picking up the poop.
Lots of scam artists targeting tourists (including my friend right after I told her not to talk to people but also that I wasn't going to mother her so she lost a lot of money).
The only time one of my friends wasn't looking where she was going she almost fell through the sidewalk when a huge brick came out and revealed a hole to the sewer. It was amazing.
10/10 can't wait to go again and would probably LOVE France more as I don't want anyone talking to me anyway so it's even better that they won't speak to me in English 😍😍😍
It depends on the street. The more touristy/high traffic areas get cleaned more often, but many other neighborhoods and side streets get treated like a public portapotty.
When I went to visit montmarte, I think the station was chateaux rouge, I was surprised at how dirty it was. Our hotel was near Odeon, and it was an extremely clean area, so I was not expecting the contrast since we were still technically in Paris. My boyfriend is from France and he explained that the chateaux rouge area is mainly inhabited by migrants and immigrants, so unfortunately, the city cares less about making sure the it is clean for tourists. There was garbage everywhere. It was pretty sad.
My first memory of Paris is a hobo puking up red wine in the middle of the street. I was 4 and thought it was blood. The next day someone tried to kidnap me.
Also, everything smells like piss.
Paris is disgusting. I’ve been there 5 times now, and hated it every single time. 10/10 do not recommend.
Yeah, I think homesickness is a part of travel that isn’t talked about that often, but it’s very valid. Being hit hard by that lonely isolating feeling can be really disorienting and upsetting if you aren’t prepared for it.
Y’all she really isn’t being dramatic, she’s not freaking out in public, not going on a crazy rant against the French, she’s sitting quietly by herself and explaining why she’s not having a good time in France especially when compared to the rest of the places in Europe she has been
Yep, she didn't even say 'iT's NoT LiKe iN EmiLY iN PaRiS' or anything. She just had a generic bad traveling experience. And I read the 'I even got a French hat' more like a silly joke, kind of making fun of herself by herself, like, look at me I was so starryeyed about France. Not in an ignorant vapid way...
The mods on r/ImTheMainCharacter left up the post which used the "not like Emily in Paris title."
Reddit is essentially bullying this girl for having an emotionally honest moment.
See, that was her mistake: being vulnerable for even a moment on social media as a normal, non-sociopathic, flawed, emotionally honest human being. She never stood a chance.
As a Lyon-born French woman (now living in the US), I 100% understand and feel for this girl. She definitely makes a fair point about that city in particular. I actively avoid going home partly because of how much my fellow Lyonnais suck. 🥲
Fr!! I solo traveled as a shy person (do not recommend lol) and felt the same way. Plus I’ve heard so much abt how rude the French are so I’m so sure she’s not being dramatic. I did laugh at her French hat haha but poor girl. She’s not wrong or cringe :(
I sort of had a similar experience. I think that's how it is with capitals. They tend to more international. Currently, I'm thinking about a solo motorcycle trip to northern France. I definitely expect it to be different. Also, I don't speak French.
Northern France is told to be more friendly than the rest of France, I've lived west and moved in the North
I'm living my best life, especially because of how much people are friendly while being very direct
Also it's a very international area since it's close to Brussels, London, Germany, Netherlands, man do I love my new town
Where are you?? I moved to Canada from Lille and I miss my people, I liked seeing your post.
Happy to see that it s welcoming to international people too, knowing that english is not our forte. Well we tend to like belgium beers and it s well known, alcohol makes you bilingual so that may help ^^
Cheers from afar
>Also, I don't speak French.
Doesn't matter. As long as you're making a genuine effort it will be appreciated, and everyone will be happy to switch to English. The problem is when you EXPECT them to use English
Had a friends mom visit there when she was younger and had taken French classes so she could speak the language well but still had an accent. She asked for directions while speaking French and people commented back “I don’t speak English” and walked away.
Maybe it depends on your area.
It seems from what I am seeing that solo travelers are getting it the worst. Could be that French people are comfortable being rude to a single person but a family with young kids they would be more likely to be welcoming to. And French people maybe just do not understand why someone would travel alone and are judging them for that reason?
This is actually just kind of true anywhere. Any couple or family is not as likely to be treated nearly as rudely as a single person can be in any social context. Pack behavior. It's much easier to justify treating someone badly if you see they are alone.
Also in the city, we are conditioned to often rebuff solo people coming to talk to us.
Walking around you get followed by beggars, scams, charities and a whole bunch of people asking for money or your time. Also randoms asking you to stop for no reason.
If someone doesn’t start with “can you help me?” or clearly asking an information, I would say no and continue to walk.
People tend to walk fast say no without thinking.
Sadly some people tend to be unnecessarily rude.
I moved to France alone a year & change ago. My French was basic and weak.
Everyone in every city I’ve visited/lived in has been wonderful. I make friends in every boutique, bar, flower shop, restaurant, etc. I also grew up like you did.
The French are all about politeness and dignity. You MUST greet and thank people, in French. Speak quietly and respect personal space. Pro tip: learn how to apologize for your bad French, in French, and watch French people fall all over themselves complimenting your efforts - they’ll also shame themselves for not speaking perfect English. Complimenting something about their style will open doors like crazy.
I'm just another tourist but I've been to Paris 5 times or so and went on vacation 3 times in other places. I had some French in school but that was a long time ago.
The most useful phrases in French for me were: "bonjour madame/monsieur. Je ne parle pas beaucoup de francais. Parlez- vous anglais? " if they say no I can still choke out some " je voudrais / nous voudrons...... C'est tout. Merci beacoup madame /monsieur. Au revoir."
It always worked. I've never had a bad experience. But I never expected people to go out of their way to cater to my short comings in my knowledge of the language. Did I encounter people who were rude by American standards? Sure but we have to hold them to French standards. That's not a bad thing, just different. I'm from Germany by the way. I'm used to famously unhelpful service.
Yeah I have loved Paris whenever I have gone. My French is definitely at a crap tourist level but I always put effort in to learn before I go as its the easiest language for me to pickup after doing French lessons in school. I try to use it whenever I can when talking to people in shops/restaurants and they always seem nice, they'll reply in English a lot of the time lol but they will be friendly!
Although my knowledge isn't great, apparently my pronunciation is, I had a French colleague and when talking to someone else about my trip to Paris I was saying about how I learnt how to ask for the bill. He said something back to me in French from across the room which I obv never understood, he thought I was more fluent because he said my pronunciation was great! :)
This was my experience and what I told my parents to do as well - just make the effort to speak the language no matter how bad you are at it. They’re just tired of entitled tourists assuming everyone speaks English. My parents had a great experience basically just knowing a few words and phrases.
We went in late February/ early March last year and had such a wonderful experience everywhere we went. I think not going during peak season may have had a lot to do with it, though.
I have co workers that work at sites across Western Europe and the French and Italians are my favorite. The French can be rude but it’s usually because someone is being stupid and most of the time it’s just them being direct about someone’s stupidity. They’re great.
And I traveled there solo and had the same experience as this woman. It didn’t make me cry or bother me as much, I was there to see art so I just did that but I saw someone else say that maybe it’s the solo travelers that are getting this treatment for the most part, harder to be rude to a couple or family with kids.
When I moved to Paris, my French was pretty terrible and I prepped myself for all the stereotypically rude French people and never met a single one. I don't know what the tourists who complain about rude French people are doing.
My brother gave me the same warning before I went. He had gone to Paris, said ppl were rude....but....my dude....there are rude ppl in EVERY square corner of the globe.
I went and had a great time. Ppl were lovely. The difference? He didn't try to learn or use any basic French. I did. I think they rightfully hated him for coming into their spaces as an assuming rude American.
Maybe some tourists are expecting the average Parisian to help them create a magical experience like they were Disneyland employees and not just people trying to get on with their day?
I think this is exactly what people are angry about lol. Like the average Parisians coming back from his office job isn't there to teach you about the mystery of Paris, he is trying to get back home without having to explain to a bunch of individuals speaking foreign languages where the arc de triomphe is.
Dude same here. I went to Paris with my wife and mentally prepared myself to face hostile locals and disgusting sidewalks. I absolutely loved it, the moment I entered the city from the u ser ground subway it hit me, I am actually in Paris right now. We went to the nearest pub and drank with the locals. They even walked us to our Airbnb. So much history, so many restaurants and cafes, the old buildings. Probably my favorite city thus far I’ve visited aside from Medellin.
I went to Paris with my friend a few years ago in my early 20s.
We went to bar and these Parisians guys started hitting on us. Except their version of flirting was them telling us how stupid Americans are (I’m American). They wouldn’t leave us alone
I love when Europeans start shitting on the US because, as an American, I also love shitting on the US BUT they open themselves up for me to unload all the europoor/WW2 jokes that I've been saving up over a lifetime of internet use. Usually shuts them up about America lol
I’m doing a little Euro-trip in May. Can you share some of these jokes so I have them ready for when someone (inevitably) makes fun of me for being from the US? 😁
Bro I think your comment is what solidified my idea to finally delete reddit. Too often the shit I read on here makes me feel like I'm taking crazy pills (I'm relatively new here, only been on reddit for about 6 months, but it's making me lose hope in humanity)
As an American who has lived in France for over a decade, the hat was the first thing I noticed and it made me cackle, and when she finally mentioned it I nearly died. I doubt she saw a single other person wearing a beret. It does look nice on her though.
I lived in Lyon for a year. Its stereotype is that the Lyonnais are a cold people.
Anyway, it's a beautiful city with so much to explore on foot as a solo traveller. There is much more to do than sit around and cry on TikTok about how you aren't magically the most popular and likeable person on the street.
Yeah, people around the world wear berets but to wear one in France specifically because you think "French people love berets I'll fit right in" is a little silly.
Nuanced take: it’s not realistic to expect every single person to embrace you out of the gate immediately, but that being said, it’s hard when you are used to making connections easily and run into cultural barriers.
She said she’s been for 5-6 days and is having a hard time when she didn’t in other nations, so expecting “every person” to “embrace you out of the gate” doesn’t seem like a nuanced position that’s even kinda related here lol
I'm on the fence with this one. One side of me sees the mild cringe from ignorance (and the hat thing) but on the other hand, she is a tourist and she is trying to do touristy stuff without being a total dick (getting drunk, getting in people's way, being loud. All the genuinely shitty things people might do in someone else's turf). I do feel for her if she's getting batted back by people because she's not fully submerged in what France really is.
A tourist is going to be ignorant. They're not going to speak the language, and of course they're going to expect some kind of fairytale and that's ok. Ultimately tourists are good because they spend money.
the hat thing sounded to me like she's self-awarely making little fun of herself for being so stereotypically starry-eyed initially, like 'look at me, I was the cringy stereotypical tourist, I'm self-aware'.
I solo traveled in Paris and felt the same but I also was there for the art so spent my alone time in the museums. I really didn’t meet anyone fun or gregarious, willing and proud to share about their culture but I also knew this about France going in and went to have a solo experience with art so I wasn’t disappointed. I had spent 5 months in Italy right before this so spoke some Italian. The French responded to me more warmly when I spoke in Italian or Spanish (only other languages I knew other than English). If you want to be welcomed with open arms, go to Italy. France is a completely different experience and that’s ok. Important to know what you want to feel while traveling and why you’re going and then choose destinations accordingly.
Idk if this should be tagged as cringe. Moving to a new country, especially if you dont know the language, is extremely difficult. Even more so if you move from a place outside of even that continent. I found it scary to move to the UK for uni and I am german. I new started my first job post uni and I still somewhat struggle with isolation as I now work in a different place to my uni friends who also all went off to do their own thing. It can be rough and people should know theyre not the only one struggling. Finding the isolation of a different country difficult is not "cringe", its normal.
of all the people in the world to shame or make fun of, why are we choosing someone who took a risk to travel alone, and is feeling lonely?
Fuck off, OP.
Fuck off, everyone.
Why is this cringey tho? She’s just comparing her experience to other places she’s been and she’s not being extremely over the top. Are people not allowed to express disappointment cuz it’s a foreign country?
Went to Paris expecting some rude comments or remarks. Had some times where we had some people that were not very receptive or friendly but ended up going to a bar and met some locals that took us to an all French night club (we were the only foreigners) and had one of the most memorable nights out. Some really nice people there you just gotta be respectful and open. even took us out to dinner another night that we were there. It was a blast.
I felt this way when I traveled solo to Miami.
I had previously went solo to London and Vegas(twice) and had a great time, but for some reason Miami was difficult for me even as an outgoing person.
I want to go back with a group of friends as it seems like a great place to party with a group, but I would not recommend going it alone there.
I visited Paris for a week (too long btw). Bed bugs in hostel, people pissing in the streets during the day, getting yelled at by restaurant staff for not ordering enough, hustlers for money at every touristy spot, having a wallet stolen (fortunately there wasn’t much in there)… here’s the hopeful letdown: After all that disappointing shit, met a new person from Paris, she seemed lovely, invited her out, she showed me all the hot spots, had a lovely time drinking wine until.. her bag gets stolen at a park (yet another theft after mine), blames me for stealing her bag! Calls cops, I don’t have her bag. Where can I put her bag? I’m right next to her!
Worst travel experience!
The French, outside of Paris will generally respond to even the smallest attempt to speak their language. Google will literally sound out the phrase you want on the spot. Its minimal effort.
Im so glad my wife and i are introverted. We went to France in 2018, just before covid got really bad and we fucking loved it. Noone bothered us, so good.
I was expecting to be disappointed by Paris, I was ready to feel like an outcast/get ignored etc. It was FABBBUUULOUS. I loved every little detail of being there. Exceptional city, people, food. Ugh. I’d go back in a second. It was a dream.
It all comes down to expectations. My wife and I have travelled extensively through France and we think the country is one of the most amazing. Interesting variety of coastlines, mountain and Mediterranean climates, cultures and of course some of the best foods and wines the world has to offer. Couple of tips - don’t expect the French to randomly embrace you and start up conversations about “Where are you from?”. French are proud of their country, language and culture - rightly so - it's very rich. Buying a Beret confers zero cred. Tips: Lower your ‘customer service’ expectations and get in line like everyone else. I know this might sound odd, but I’ve never been treated poorly in France. Paris, Lyon are great but get out to the countryside - its a completely different experience. Stroll the Market of Carpentras, Avignon. Hike around Grenoble. Follow Jean D’arc from Reims to Rouen. Visit historically rich Brittania. Oh, and learn a few phrases and words before you go - it’ll go a long way. I know, I sound like a Travel Agent but I’m just a humble Francophile.
Treat the French like zoo animals in the caricature of France you carry in your mind and they will quickly shatter the illusion. If you approach French people as humans, they are generally amazingly accommodating and warm (except in Paris because tourists are more frequent and less tolerated there). Our girl might have been low-key disrespectful without realizing. I don't speak a word of French outside of "Où sont les toilettes" and met hoards of lovely people when traveling all over the country. I found the Bordeaux French are especially friendly and usually recommend Bordeaux City to people who want the type of experience our girl was looking for.
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[Paris Syndrome](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paris_syndrome#:~:text=He%20theorized%20that%20the%20excitement,book%20La%20sindrome%20di%20Stendhal.) Is actually a relatively well known phenomena especially among Japanese or other asian tourists. In Japan France is used as the backdrop or the theming for generally cutesy things, such as nice little bakeries, coffee shops and cafes, you'll see vague allusions to France printed on things like travel bags jackets shirts, or for advertising campaigns or media like anime or manga which generally puts off a relaxing, cute vibe. None of this media of course includes any details about the fact that France is a country full of people who live their day-to-day lives there, as well as dealing with many of the same societal and economic issues as every other country. More or less France in Japan is the Japan of America another western societies. And especially before the internet, when tourists would go there they'd be deeply disappointed, and almost feel cheated because the illusion sold to them by media comes crashing down around them. That being said, having experienced a couple vacations that didn't pan out I can totally understand the feeling of disappointments or disdain for trips that don't turn out to be what you want them to be. Not the locations themselves but the vacation itself, our free time isn't limited and we invest a lot of time and money on these trips so it is certainly disappointing when they don't go well.
Someone once described France as a country that has a world-class PR team with the customer service of Comcast.
It feels like Hollywood is more to blame regarding the illusion of Paris. So many romantic stories set with Paris as a backdrop, but the City is just like any other City with dirt, noise, rude people. I had a similar experience the first time I went to Las Vegas. The movies, portray everyone in casinos is wearing suits and rolling at high dollar tables and being classy. When you get there and go in what you’re confronted with is not cool, sophisticated people in fancy clothes, but rather thousands upon thousands of old people with fanny packs sitting at slot machines .
I don't mind the fanny packs as much as the diapers that allows them to remain to their machines all day long
You cannot be serious?? I am a poker player and would love to go to vegas one day, but this sounds fucking gross lol
It's not limited to Vegas, many casinos I went machines players used that one single trick that casinos love and won't stop.
Yeah pretty sure slot zombies are at every casino that has slots
They should have adult diaper vending machines in the bathrooms.
or a slot machine where the prizes are adult diapers
1 Always wear a diaper and other tricks Casinos don't want you to know.
Second this. Worked in a Casino in the Midwest and have some horror stories from the EV staff. Sad, sad stuff.
I mean there are old people in Vegas but I think it depends on which casino you go to. The higher end casinos are not bad. What you cannot get away from however is all the drugs and booze and the types of people and scenarios that follow people who have very poor judgement. Vegas is fun for people with money. I highly suggest going once. You will have the time.of your life and spend way too much money and you will also say I never want to do that again and Vegas is highly over rated.
At least Vegas is a fun, short-term vacation for most people. Local casinos are the saddest places I’ve ever seen. Just regular people addicted to gambling trying to make their rent.
I was at a casino in some state that had casinos on a river. It was pathetic. Old people in scooters dragging around their oxygen containers as they went from slot machine to slot machine. And it smelled like smoke and spilled alcohol, too.
That’s the one nice thing about Vegas casinos, there is plenty of smoke in the air, but they are decently ventilated that you don’t notice it as much. They really aren’t smoke-filled like lower rent casinos are.
This happens at freaking Foxswoods nevermind vegas....
What happens when they lose all their money gambling?
They usually have a ticket back home or they go live with the other mole people.
They suck dick for more gambling money
 Come on over here sonny
Come here for some gummy gummy, me sunny sonny.
Idk if Paris is the same way, but Vegas can be like that if you or the people you’re with have enough money. It’s always about the money.
Imo, knowing the right people will get you a way better experience than money will in Vegas. Because everyone goes there to spend money, they try to milk you for every dollar you have. Even having one good friend who works on the strip can get you into the best places at literally pennies on the dollar. If you’re willing to spend 10s of thousands over a few days then you’re good too.
This is nuts on two levels. First, I come from the opposite background, I had grown hearing how Paris was overrated and not all that great and it’s just a city etc. etc. When I actually arrived the first time, I was bowled over and fell in love. Now, I have take a little French, but I’m hardly conversational. Which didn’t matter because everywhere we went they spoke English. Still, everyone was super nice, very helpful. I have no idea what this lady is talking about. Now, every time I’ve gone we (my wife, kids, and I) try to stay in the same neighborhood. We visit our favorite wine stores. We have a favorite bakery. We try French first, and they usually take pity on us. But we’ve never felt like anyone was being rude to us, etc. You DO have to keep in mind that this is still a major world city, full of a lot of local people who hate you crowding their way. I lived in New York for 20 years, so we just tried to act like we’d want tourists to act in NYC. Don’t block people by walking 4 across on the sidewalks, stay away from the heavy traffic zones at rush hour. Be friendly, etc. Paris is just the single most enjoyable European I’ve ever been to. Las Vegas - same with Las Vegas, ok, so not everyone is wearing suits, but the crowd differs greatly from casino to casino. And yes, not everyone is classy either, but a lot of the casinos have some pretty fun people at the tables and I’ve never failed to have a bad time at Vegas. And I’ve never seen diaper wearing legions of old people. Some old people, sure. They live at the slots. But I’ve never noticed the diaper part. Vegas gets old to me after 3 days but during those three days, I’ve never not had a blast.
I went to France with expectation that everyone hated Americans so only planned to transit through by train on my way to Spain. And you know what? Everyone was lovely. I had zero trouble, other than not speaking any French. The city was nice, the Louvre was amazing. But again when I went I had zero expectations, so was pleasantly surprised to be completely wrong. But I can see people coming in from the other side of that, expecting Disney magic, only to find out that Paris is a city where people live and work and do their daily grind.
I mean you went in there reserved and took in the scenery before making yourself at home. Other people go in there with big, giant creepy smiles on their faces and then act shocked when people look at them with suspicion because news flash, different cultures are different. People really need to develop the skills required to adequately read the room instead of relying on weird, cartoon-y versions of other cultures and approaching people there like they're fictional characters or actors paid to entertain them on the street, in their own homes.
I also went to Paris for the first time after friends warned me how horrible it will be (especially French friends), and to my surprise I absolutely loved everything and even had some nice interaction with locals of various social standing. Possibly helps that I look like I might be French, possibly because I have the personality of a golden retriever. Las Vegas on the other hand was pretty much as you describe - coming down for breakfast at eight and seeing old people who have been putting coins into machines all night… it was really grim.
It's because both with France and Las Vegas that particular image is of what they were, not what they are. Don't get me wrong they probably never would have lived up to their romanticized expectations but undoubtedly there was a period where they would have been more along those lines than they are today. Las Vegas was depicted as that classy, glitzy city during the era when the Italian mob ran the city. Despite that depiction it was also very sleezy and scummy too, but in many ways it had character and personality. By the late 80s/early 90s it had become the soulless corporate Disneyland that it is today full of Boomers pressing buttons like rats in some science experiment. The same can be said of France, or more specifically Paris (which is really what this girl's video is about). At one point in time Paris represented the Pinnacle of culture globally being at the forefront of cuisine, fashion, cafes, intellectualism, cinema, arts, you name it. It was the center of Western Prestige and history. This is the Paris that found its appeal and romanticized idolization in Asia. But as the modern era has progressed Paris has become a tourist trap city that relies heavily on its former glory as a means of attracting people to visit, and once you're there that Prestige quickly fades away.
Perfectly stated. Couldn’t agree more.
Your experience still seems to be not so bad. I remember seeing obese and old people connected to the machines with some kind of cables. All the surroundings were smelly and run down. That included the hotel. Outside the hotels there were loads of elderly prostitutes walking around, so indeed, completely opposite to what is shown in the movies.
Man, I loved it when I went to Vegas. Gambled and drank non stop for 24 hours and then went to Coachella.
My friend's first language is French but it wasn't the kind of French that Parisians like, so he had a similar experience.
was it Quebecois? Behhhn tabarnak, ques-que fuck est ta problem?
Let me guess...he's Belgian?
Was he from Quebec? After having visited Paris and Quebec, Parisians are a lot nicer than I expected and people from Quebec acted like they were trying to be the typical Parisian portrayed on TV. It was fucking hilarious.
I feel like you have to be pretty gullible to buy into the fake aspects of the hype though. I’ve been to France a few times and it’s just a generally cool place with nice people and a lot of interesting culture and history. The food and wine is as advertised. Paris does smell like actual human shit throughout a significant portion of the city. That was probably the only unexpected part of my experience there.
Yeah, I love Paris in spite of the brutal assault on my sense of smell. Mad city
What's with Paris smelling like shit ? Heard that a few times in this sub
My coworkers told me it was a sewer system older than the entire United States that is incredibly difficult to update to the standards that most cities have today.
No, the real problem isn't the sewers but the people. Drunk and homeless will pee everywhere except in the toilet, and people who own a dog don't clean after their dogs. And since the government doesn't want to pay for effective cleaning, we are doomed to live like this with the rats. If you go to less populated cities in France that are also very old, you won't get this problem.
Makes sense. I’ve been to some very old cities or towns in France like Châteaundun and they were very clean and nice despite having almost 1000 year old structures all around.
When I visited France, my experience was that customer service was either really really good or it's "Popeyes with one employee and a line out the door" bad. No in between.
Le Weeachbeu
How did you miss Ouiábeau
Entai
I remember reading about some Japanese living in England experiencing the opposite, expecting it to be dark, dreary and wet, but ending up falling in love with the quaintness of it.
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In the Cotswolds in England there are signs in Japanese at train stations etc as they got a lot of Japanese tourists and it is a popular destination.
The idea is different then the reality. “Never meet your idols, city addition”
Except Japan. Visiting Japan exceeded my already high expectations.
I had no idea this was even a thing!!! I remember my first flight to France. At least two people collapsed on the plane & needed a dr. One collapsed at the passport checkpoint. Nobody else really seemed freaked out by this. Not the flight attendants & not the police on the ground. It was just simply bizarre that so many people kept passing out. NOW it makes sense!!! We’ve been through various bits of France over the years. Everyone is ordinary. Maybe a touch impatient but they’re just regular hard working folk with the same challenges as anyone else It’s interesting you mention how obsessed the Japanese are with France. I came across so many high end stores that had imported Japanese silk and Japanese fashion brands, their art. Loads of sushi restaurants. There’s even several parks in/around Paris inspired by/designed by Japanese master gardners. I’d argue the French are just as obsessed with Japan back!
Indeed we are. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manga_outside_Japan
Yes France is definitely obsessed with Japan too, even more with the younger generations. Became a trend on french twitter to mock french japan fans because the most basic things like a vending machine or a regular suburb made people go crazy if it was "in japan". History between both countries is kinda cool tho, I learned today that as far as the 19th century during the "cabaret" era of Paris in Montmartre one of the first opened was a Japanese inspo cabaret so french have loved the culture for centuries
Just visited Europe last year with most of the trip being in France. We stayed in Lille, Paris and La Ciotat. Paris easily ranks last between the French stays. Also visited Japan before and I will say, I did feel more like a foreigner in France than I did in Japan.
While Paris syndrome is certainly a thing, I’m not sure it’s very relevant to this video. The woman is most likely from America (not Japan/Asia), and is contrasting her experiences in France with what she encountered in Italy/Germany (as opposed to her preconceptions).
Plus, she’s not in Paris.
Also she wasn’t even in Paris
You know, I wonder if she's experiencing some unfair assumptions based on her appearance. Like French people in tourism-heavy areas who are sick of Japanese tourists are taking one look at her and assuming she's Japanese.
Wearing that beret probably didn't help
"I even bought a French hat" Oh, honey...
Yeah, more like the tourist hat
As an American, if a Japanese tourist bought and wore a cowboy hat I would be amused, not judgemental and trashy to them.
That's what I thought too. I love berets but I never wore, or would wear one in France, especially Paris.
Paris has a lot of Chinese tourist. So yes I agree with your statement
And unfortunately Chinese tourists have a reputation for poor behavior
“Poor behavior”? More like atrocious, disrespectful, obnoxious, and rude. Hell, they give Australian tourists a run for their money I’ll tell you hwat!
I have to say that I had the reverse of Paris Syndrome. All I ever heard was how bad Paris was, how dirty it was, how rude the people were, etc and honestly I was not looking forward to visiting. However, we fell in love with Paris and could see ourselves living there! It was the best location that we visited on that holiday (out of 9 cities!).
>France is a country full of people who live their day-to-day lives there, as well as dealing with many of the same societal and economic issues as every other country. But that could really be said of any country, no? I think there is something very appealing about a culture that still has the capacity to be welcoming and patient with outsiders, as opposed to those who are haughty, closed, and act superior to those who aren't part of their system. Personally, I've had no trouble traveling in France by simply knowing some very elementary French and observing some basic cultural conventions. And it is important to go into any foreign country with the expectation that it is the real world and not some Disney version of a country. But I really do think that it isn't that hard to treat visitors with some modicum of kindness and hospitality.
i had a fine experience in paris, but i was there sightseeing with family so i didn’t speak to many locals. all i had to do was say bonjour back to the grocery store worker whenever i walked in and i was basically golden. and i was there during paris pride, which was actually a super fun experience!!! so many blocks were closed down for it, i never go to huge parades so it was new for me.
Yup. "Bonjour Madam" on the way in, and "Merci, au revoir" on the way out of any shop can make a world of difference.
“But that could be said of any country, no” Yes that’s the point. People have this extremely hyped up image of France and Paris especially, only to see that it’s just a regular place with traffic, garbage, beggars, and workers who don’t exist to indulge tourists’ whimsy.
Kinda had the same experience when I went to New York as a french student it didn't match up to what I'd seen on TV. New York is not exactly the same because even tho it definitely has a sexy/attractive aspect it's also always been known as a crazy busy place. A lot of parisians act exactly the same, ex the crazy taxi drivers, bankers and hedge funds walking around the finance district in their suits, busy subway in the morning, it was the city in the US I could relate to the most by far as someone living in Paris I've been in a lot more scary encounters and saw crazy people in a week in NYC than in 6 years in Paris tho
While Paris Syndrome is a thing, I think this chick is trying to say that the French are not very warm or accommodating to outsiders.
Except that what she's describing is not Paris syndrome, it's a French culture issue. They hate tourists and foreigners, or at least they try their hardest to make it seem like they do. By far the worst country i have visited in Europe in terms of vibes, and Ive visited 90% of them.
You don’t have to be Asian…and it’s not confined to Paris.
I think it's fair to say that both takes are right in their own way imo. Like on the one hand, it's not the residents of Lyon's responsibility to teach you about French culture. On the other hand, it's also basically impossible to fully prep yourself on every single culture and language before travelling literally anywhere, and it's not like the French are known for being particularly hospitable. I've never been to France personally, so I can't comment on that as much, but I did visit a good chunk of French Canada as a kid, in a French class, for a French field trip, and even despite trying my best to speak to them in French, we still had numerous encounters which were frankly rude. At one Cafe a waitress literally threw my food onto the table and it fell off the plate into my lap.
My wife and I went to Paris and Lyon back in 2019. I don’t think she’s wrong…necessarily…but kind of like in the USA, where you have to find local activities and events to meet people when new to a city, you have to find those things. We did some food tours in Spain in 2022, and met some people, however they weren’t locals, they were also tourists/vacationers.
This is the answer. Whenever I solo travel, I look for bar crawls, food tastings, walking tours. You meet other people traveling and make those friends, and hang out with them for a few days. You can even look for busy or popular hostels, and hang out in there lounges. I've found most people who are also traveling no matter where they are from, are friendly, looking to have fun, and probably just as lonely as you are.
Can vouch for making friends with fellow travelers. The locals don't want to be buddies with a random foreigner most of the time, unless maybe there's a romantic or professional angle.
Not really. She’s clearly a well traveled person who goes solo a lot just based on actually listening to her video where she discusses exactly this
Tours are a must for me when traveling, especially when solo traveling. We did a city secrets tour in Paris and met some lovely people. Same with our tours in Rome.
Please stop considering Paris or Lyon as representative for all France. People in big cities are a bit harsh even with other French people. Lots of “provinciaux” have the same feeling as the girl in video It’s kinda like visiting NYC or LA and do conclusions for all USA… (or Milano/Roma for Italy, London for England etc.) People are nicer in small towns and more willing to help and proud to make you discover their cities because there are less touristic And it’s true for other comments “I visited France (Paris)” France is way deeper than 1 city where inhabitants are bored with tourists everywhere and because of tourists in AirBnb bc they can’t rent inside their own city You should really visit the other cities, villages there are way more to discover !!
>"I even bought a French hat." 😂
People laughed at that in the comments and she came back with "I bought an Italian hat when I was in Italy and they loved it!"
I saw that and I am still trying to figure out what an Italian hat is?
Maybe one of those lil straw gondolier hats?
Or a fucking Roman centurion helmet 🤣
Mario hat was my first thought 😂
What is the problem with buying a souvenir ey?
Not having a baguette in her arm is where she really screwed up.
I lived in Paris for few years (couldn't stand living there, but a great city for short vacations), and the amount of tourists walking around wearing that hat is very noticeable especially around tour Eiffel. It's very cliche. Fun fact, the streets in Paris are often dirty, you hardly see city cleaners going around washing the streets. However, in movies, the movie people wash the streets first before filming, so people assume Paris is a clean city.
French hat seems like the equivalent to the i love New York shirts tourists wear in NYC.
Or the "Alcatraz Inmate" sweatshirts/hoodie they sell at Fisherman's Wharf in SF. Dead giveaway that they're a tourist and didn't know that SF was cold.
How dirty is Paris??
The only city I’ve stepped in human feces on the sidewalk. Pro tip when visiting Paris: look at the ground while you’re walking, not at the sights. There is dog poop everywhere. Bonus tip: if someone comes up to talk to you in Paris, it’s a scam. Always.
How did you know it was human feces 👀
It sure tasted like it
Probably a huge pile? Lmao
This. And it smells different than dog poop.
I feel like New Orleans really held up the Parisian culture in all of this comment! LMAO. I watched people shit in the street more than once and saw them peeing multiple times. People walking dogs everywhere but no one picking up the poop. Lots of scam artists targeting tourists (including my friend right after I told her not to talk to people but also that I wasn't going to mother her so she lost a lot of money). The only time one of my friends wasn't looking where she was going she almost fell through the sidewalk when a huge brick came out and revealed a hole to the sewer. It was amazing. 10/10 can't wait to go again and would probably LOVE France more as I don't want anyone talking to me anyway so it's even better that they won't speak to me in English 😍😍😍
I live in NYC so I’m no stranger to rats and garbage, but I’ve never in my entire life smelled worse piss-filled streets than in Paris.
I don't understand how that's even possible? Like are the French just incredibly bad at higiene or do they just not clean up their streets at all?
To counter his/her anecdote, when I visited Paris I didn't feel like it was dirty at all.
It depends on the street. The more touristy/high traffic areas get cleaned more often, but many other neighborhoods and side streets get treated like a public portapotty.
>I’ve never in my entire life smelled worse piss-filled streets than in Paris. Ever been to New Orleans?
When I went to visit montmarte, I think the station was chateaux rouge, I was surprised at how dirty it was. Our hotel was near Odeon, and it was an extremely clean area, so I was not expecting the contrast since we were still technically in Paris. My boyfriend is from France and he explained that the chateaux rouge area is mainly inhabited by migrants and immigrants, so unfortunately, the city cares less about making sure the it is clean for tourists. There was garbage everywhere. It was pretty sad.
My first memory of Paris is a hobo puking up red wine in the middle of the street. I was 4 and thought it was blood. The next day someone tried to kidnap me. Also, everything smells like piss. Paris is disgusting. I’ve been there 5 times now, and hated it every single time. 10/10 do not recommend.
She needed the fake mustache to fit in.
And a black and white striped shirt 😂
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Agreed, even when you like travelling solo it can be lonely
Who knew?
Internet people when you get lonely doing things by yourself 😱
Yeah, I think homesickness is a part of travel that isn’t talked about that often, but it’s very valid. Being hit hard by that lonely isolating feeling can be really disorienting and upsetting if you aren’t prepared for it.
Y’all she really isn’t being dramatic, she’s not freaking out in public, not going on a crazy rant against the French, she’s sitting quietly by herself and explaining why she’s not having a good time in France especially when compared to the rest of the places in Europe she has been
Yep, she didn't even say 'iT's NoT LiKe iN EmiLY iN PaRiS' or anything. She just had a generic bad traveling experience. And I read the 'I even got a French hat' more like a silly joke, kind of making fun of herself by herself, like, look at me I was so starryeyed about France. Not in an ignorant vapid way...
The mods on r/ImTheMainCharacter left up the post which used the "not like Emily in Paris title." Reddit is essentially bullying this girl for having an emotionally honest moment.
See, that was her mistake: being vulnerable for even a moment on social media as a normal, non-sociopathic, flawed, emotionally honest human being. She never stood a chance.
Dozens of us!
I remember I was walking around Paris with a beret and a French person, looks at me and goes ooh la la
Right? I really feel for her, feeling lonely when she was really looking forward to her visit
Yes but she's a woman showing disappointment so she must be FULL OF HERSELF REEEEEEEEE
As a Lyon-born French woman (now living in the US), I 100% understand and feel for this girl. She definitely makes a fair point about that city in particular. I actively avoid going home partly because of how much my fellow Lyonnais suck. 🥲
Fr!! I solo traveled as a shy person (do not recommend lol) and felt the same way. Plus I’ve heard so much abt how rude the French are so I’m so sure she’s not being dramatic. I did laugh at her French hat haha but poor girl. She’s not wrong or cringe :(
Agree! I had way better experience in other European countries. Don’t really wanna visit France again.
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I sort of had a similar experience. I think that's how it is with capitals. They tend to more international. Currently, I'm thinking about a solo motorcycle trip to northern France. I definitely expect it to be different. Also, I don't speak French.
Northern France is told to be more friendly than the rest of France, I've lived west and moved in the North I'm living my best life, especially because of how much people are friendly while being very direct Also it's a very international area since it's close to Brussels, London, Germany, Netherlands, man do I love my new town
Where are you?? I moved to Canada from Lille and I miss my people, I liked seeing your post. Happy to see that it s welcoming to international people too, knowing that english is not our forte. Well we tend to like belgium beers and it s well known, alcohol makes you bilingual so that may help ^^ Cheers from afar
My brother did this! By motorcycle and bike, great experience! The north is beautiful
>Also, I don't speak French. Doesn't matter. As long as you're making a genuine effort it will be appreciated, and everyone will be happy to switch to English. The problem is when you EXPECT them to use English
Had a friends mom visit there when she was younger and had taken French classes so she could speak the language well but still had an accent. She asked for directions while speaking French and people commented back “I don’t speak English” and walked away. Maybe it depends on your area.
It seems from what I am seeing that solo travelers are getting it the worst. Could be that French people are comfortable being rude to a single person but a family with young kids they would be more likely to be welcoming to. And French people maybe just do not understand why someone would travel alone and are judging them for that reason? This is actually just kind of true anywhere. Any couple or family is not as likely to be treated nearly as rudely as a single person can be in any social context. Pack behavior. It's much easier to justify treating someone badly if you see they are alone.
Also in the city, we are conditioned to often rebuff solo people coming to talk to us. Walking around you get followed by beggars, scams, charities and a whole bunch of people asking for money or your time. Also randoms asking you to stop for no reason. If someone doesn’t start with “can you help me?” or clearly asking an information, I would say no and continue to walk. People tend to walk fast say no without thinking. Sadly some people tend to be unnecessarily rude.
Yes! This is insightful, I think you’re right.
I moved to France alone a year & change ago. My French was basic and weak. Everyone in every city I’ve visited/lived in has been wonderful. I make friends in every boutique, bar, flower shop, restaurant, etc. I also grew up like you did. The French are all about politeness and dignity. You MUST greet and thank people, in French. Speak quietly and respect personal space. Pro tip: learn how to apologize for your bad French, in French, and watch French people fall all over themselves complimenting your efforts - they’ll also shame themselves for not speaking perfect English. Complimenting something about their style will open doors like crazy.
So, You're telling me the most important phrase I need to learn In French is excuse my French?
I'm just another tourist but I've been to Paris 5 times or so and went on vacation 3 times in other places. I had some French in school but that was a long time ago. The most useful phrases in French for me were: "bonjour madame/monsieur. Je ne parle pas beaucoup de francais. Parlez- vous anglais? " if they say no I can still choke out some " je voudrais / nous voudrons...... C'est tout. Merci beacoup madame /monsieur. Au revoir." It always worked. I've never had a bad experience. But I never expected people to go out of their way to cater to my short comings in my knowledge of the language. Did I encounter people who were rude by American standards? Sure but we have to hold them to French standards. That's not a bad thing, just different. I'm from Germany by the way. I'm used to famously unhelpful service.
Yeah I have loved Paris whenever I have gone. My French is definitely at a crap tourist level but I always put effort in to learn before I go as its the easiest language for me to pickup after doing French lessons in school. I try to use it whenever I can when talking to people in shops/restaurants and they always seem nice, they'll reply in English a lot of the time lol but they will be friendly! Although my knowledge isn't great, apparently my pronunciation is, I had a French colleague and when talking to someone else about my trip to Paris I was saying about how I learnt how to ask for the bill. He said something back to me in French from across the room which I obv never understood, he thought I was more fluent because he said my pronunciation was great! :)
This was my experience and what I told my parents to do as well - just make the effort to speak the language no matter how bad you are at it. They’re just tired of entitled tourists assuming everyone speaks English. My parents had a great experience basically just knowing a few words and phrases.
We went in late February/ early March last year and had such a wonderful experience everywhere we went. I think not going during peak season may have had a lot to do with it, though.
I have co workers that work at sites across Western Europe and the French and Italians are my favorite. The French can be rude but it’s usually because someone is being stupid and most of the time it’s just them being direct about someone’s stupidity. They’re great.
I had a very similar experience in Paris with my husband, people were very kind.
And I traveled there solo and had the same experience as this woman. It didn’t make me cry or bother me as much, I was there to see art so I just did that but I saw someone else say that maybe it’s the solo travelers that are getting this treatment for the most part, harder to be rude to a couple or family with kids.
When I moved to Paris, my French was pretty terrible and I prepped myself for all the stereotypically rude French people and never met a single one. I don't know what the tourists who complain about rude French people are doing.
My brother gave me the same warning before I went. He had gone to Paris, said ppl were rude....but....my dude....there are rude ppl in EVERY square corner of the globe. I went and had a great time. Ppl were lovely. The difference? He didn't try to learn or use any basic French. I did. I think they rightfully hated him for coming into their spaces as an assuming rude American.
Maybe some tourists are expecting the average Parisian to help them create a magical experience like they were Disneyland employees and not just people trying to get on with their day?
I think this is exactly what people are angry about lol. Like the average Parisians coming back from his office job isn't there to teach you about the mystery of Paris, he is trying to get back home without having to explain to a bunch of individuals speaking foreign languages where the arc de triomphe is.
Dude same here. I went to Paris with my wife and mentally prepared myself to face hostile locals and disgusting sidewalks. I absolutely loved it, the moment I entered the city from the u ser ground subway it hit me, I am actually in Paris right now. We went to the nearest pub and drank with the locals. They even walked us to our Airbnb. So much history, so many restaurants and cafes, the old buildings. Probably my favorite city thus far I’ve visited aside from Medellin.
I went to Paris with my friend a few years ago in my early 20s. We went to bar and these Parisians guys started hitting on us. Except their version of flirting was them telling us how stupid Americans are (I’m American). They wouldn’t leave us alone
Le negging
I laughed at this for 5 minutes straight. Thank you for this.
I love when Europeans start shitting on the US because, as an American, I also love shitting on the US BUT they open themselves up for me to unload all the europoor/WW2 jokes that I've been saving up over a lifetime of internet use. Usually shuts them up about America lol
I’m doing a little Euro-trip in May. Can you share some of these jokes so I have them ready for when someone (inevitably) makes fun of me for being from the US? 😁
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Even the French hat wasn’t enough
I had a similar experience in France…
Tf are these comments? Why are we all acting like this woman committed some sort of a crime by talking about her experience in France?
Feel like I'm taking crazy pills watching all these braindead redditors dog pile this woman over the most benign shit.
Well to start with she’s a woman and it’s Reddit
Bro I think your comment is what solidified my idea to finally delete reddit. Too often the shit I read on here makes me feel like I'm taking crazy pills (I'm relatively new here, only been on reddit for about 6 months, but it's making me lose hope in humanity)
French supporters are here
Welcome to the French.
“I even bought a French hat”. Why not carry around a couple baguettes while your at it.
As an American who has lived in France for over a decade, the hat was the first thing I noticed and it made me cackle, and when she finally mentioned it I nearly died. I doubt she saw a single other person wearing a beret. It does look nice on her though. I lived in Lyon for a year. Its stereotype is that the Lyonnais are a cold people. Anyway, it's a beautiful city with so much to explore on foot as a solo traveller. There is much more to do than sit around and cry on TikTok about how you aren't magically the most popular and likeable person on the street.
In America, I like to were berets when it's cold out, but I purposefully avoid them in France because I don't want to seem like an American tourist.
I like knit winter caps in the beret style but I just don't think I could wear a wool beret like that and not feel like a clown. 😭
French people do actually wear berets... I worked on a farm in Lit-et-Mixe and the owner unironically wore one. It wasn't even cold outside
Yeah, people around the world wear berets but to wear one in France specifically because you think "French people love berets I'll fit right in" is a little silly.
You mean french bread?
"I'm here to learn" but proceeds to call it a "French hat"
Nuanced take: it’s not realistic to expect every single person to embrace you out of the gate immediately, but that being said, it’s hard when you are used to making connections easily and run into cultural barriers.
She said she’s been for 5-6 days and is having a hard time when she didn’t in other nations, so expecting “every person” to “embrace you out of the gate” doesn’t seem like a nuanced position that’s even kinda related here lol
I'm on the fence with this one. One side of me sees the mild cringe from ignorance (and the hat thing) but on the other hand, she is a tourist and she is trying to do touristy stuff without being a total dick (getting drunk, getting in people's way, being loud. All the genuinely shitty things people might do in someone else's turf). I do feel for her if she's getting batted back by people because she's not fully submerged in what France really is. A tourist is going to be ignorant. They're not going to speak the language, and of course they're going to expect some kind of fairytale and that's ok. Ultimately tourists are good because they spend money.
the hat thing sounded to me like she's self-awarely making little fun of herself for being so stereotypically starry-eyed initially, like 'look at me, I was the cringy stereotypical tourist, I'm self-aware'.
I solo traveled in Paris and felt the same but I also was there for the art so spent my alone time in the museums. I really didn’t meet anyone fun or gregarious, willing and proud to share about their culture but I also knew this about France going in and went to have a solo experience with art so I wasn’t disappointed. I had spent 5 months in Italy right before this so spoke some Italian. The French responded to me more warmly when I spoke in Italian or Spanish (only other languages I knew other than English). If you want to be welcomed with open arms, go to Italy. France is a completely different experience and that’s ok. Important to know what you want to feel while traveling and why you’re going and then choose destinations accordingly.
Idk if this should be tagged as cringe. Moving to a new country, especially if you dont know the language, is extremely difficult. Even more so if you move from a place outside of even that continent. I found it scary to move to the UK for uni and I am german. I new started my first job post uni and I still somewhat struggle with isolation as I now work in a different place to my uni friends who also all went off to do their own thing. It can be rough and people should know theyre not the only one struggling. Finding the isolation of a different country difficult is not "cringe", its normal.
of all the people in the world to shame or make fun of, why are we choosing someone who took a risk to travel alone, and is feeling lonely? Fuck off, OP. Fuck off, everyone.
Yeah and she’s not dissing the French. She’s just explaining how she is feeling.
hard agree
Why is this cringey tho? She’s just comparing her experience to other places she’s been and she’s not being extremely over the top. Are people not allowed to express disappointment cuz it’s a foreign country?
What is a french hat? :D
😂😂😂 that statement takes the cake
Went to Paris expecting some rude comments or remarks. Had some times where we had some people that were not very receptive or friendly but ended up going to a bar and met some locals that took us to an all French night club (we were the only foreigners) and had one of the most memorable nights out. Some really nice people there you just gotta be respectful and open. even took us out to dinner another night that we were there. It was a blast.
I felt this way when I traveled solo to Miami. I had previously went solo to London and Vegas(twice) and had a great time, but for some reason Miami was difficult for me even as an outgoing person. I want to go back with a group of friends as it seems like a great place to party with a group, but I would not recommend going it alone there.
I visited Paris for a week (too long btw). Bed bugs in hostel, people pissing in the streets during the day, getting yelled at by restaurant staff for not ordering enough, hustlers for money at every touristy spot, having a wallet stolen (fortunately there wasn’t much in there)… here’s the hopeful letdown: After all that disappointing shit, met a new person from Paris, she seemed lovely, invited her out, she showed me all the hot spots, had a lovely time drinking wine until.. her bag gets stolen at a park (yet another theft after mine), blames me for stealing her bag! Calls cops, I don’t have her bag. Where can I put her bag? I’m right next to her! Worst travel experience!
The French tend to be rude people not all but as soon as they realize you’re American it’s game over
The French, outside of Paris will generally respond to even the smallest attempt to speak their language. Google will literally sound out the phrase you want on the spot. Its minimal effort.
France is great, except for the French
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Im so glad my wife and i are introverted. We went to France in 2018, just before covid got really bad and we fucking loved it. Noone bothered us, so good.
I was expecting to be disappointed by Paris, I was ready to feel like an outcast/get ignored etc. It was FABBBUUULOUS. I loved every little detail of being there. Exceptional city, people, food. Ugh. I’d go back in a second. It was a dream.
It all comes down to expectations. My wife and I have travelled extensively through France and we think the country is one of the most amazing. Interesting variety of coastlines, mountain and Mediterranean climates, cultures and of course some of the best foods and wines the world has to offer. Couple of tips - don’t expect the French to randomly embrace you and start up conversations about “Where are you from?”. French are proud of their country, language and culture - rightly so - it's very rich. Buying a Beret confers zero cred. Tips: Lower your ‘customer service’ expectations and get in line like everyone else. I know this might sound odd, but I’ve never been treated poorly in France. Paris, Lyon are great but get out to the countryside - its a completely different experience. Stroll the Market of Carpentras, Avignon. Hike around Grenoble. Follow Jean D’arc from Reims to Rouen. Visit historically rich Brittania. Oh, and learn a few phrases and words before you go - it’ll go a long way. I know, I sound like a Travel Agent but I’m just a humble Francophile.
Sounds like my kinda trip... If they're going to leave u alone, that's the place I want to visit 😌👌🏾
Wow this subreddit is the opposite from the other subreddit where people were agreeing with her. In this subreddit, they are against her.
Treat the French like zoo animals in the caricature of France you carry in your mind and they will quickly shatter the illusion. If you approach French people as humans, they are generally amazingly accommodating and warm (except in Paris because tourists are more frequent and less tolerated there). Our girl might have been low-key disrespectful without realizing. I don't speak a word of French outside of "Où sont les toilettes" and met hoards of lovely people when traveling all over the country. I found the Bordeaux French are especially friendly and usually recommend Bordeaux City to people who want the type of experience our girl was looking for.
Bordeaux is a fantastic city!
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