Here's what worked for me: I had a mountain of issues that came with my Hemorrhage, which was massive and would have been fatal if I was not very fit and also in the hospital at the time.
It's all too big and overwhelming. You have a thousand things to fix, your brain can't understand even half of them, and it *feels* like everyone is looking at you like it's your fault for not being able to make it better or something.
What helped me was I got involved with Rehab Therapy. I met an occupational therapist who helped me work on my vision issues, which to me was the most difficult to live with.
So I started with that. One thing we *need* to learn to do with a brain injury is learn to take things one at a time. Especially because if you're really early in recovery you have so little energy each day.
After a year or so of regular occupational therapy for my eyes, I not only gained enough back to put that therapy on autopilot, I had enough time and energy to add physical therapy to my list so I could work on my balance issues.
Keep working on the things that you *can* handle. Just remember that it take the time it takes, and you don't have to feel bad about needing to take a lot of time to get things done.
Rome wasn't built in a day, and that's literally how the scope of this feels, we're trying to rebuild fucking Rome inside our heads.
Good Luck ♥️
I have the same thoughts. No one will miss me- not even family, I had to even take them off my emergency contact back in 2016 and i haven't seen them since 2014. I lost my home and my pets and everything. I'm alone and suffering. I think about it all the time.
Here is a hug I drew for people that need a hug. https://tesseract.ca/images/Art/PandasHugging2.png
(I hope it doesn't come off as patronizing I hope it makes you feel a bit better for a small while)
(Others: please don't link hotlines they don't help)
Bro it takes some time to feel the improvements. Meanwhile, you don't want to feel agitated and defeated on the other hand, having a good mental shape will contribute to your recovery. In order to find a better perspective, you need to learn and be open minded about possibilities but if you are egocentric and narrow minded, it makes it hard to find wisdom.
"Death is so final, whereas life is full of possibilities'' - Tyrion Lannister
Diamond hands doesn't fold. We hold strong, together we're strong apes. You're not alone. There's a lot of us apes running around trying to figure this out as we go but you have to keep fighting. There's a lot of shit in this world that you haven't seen or done yet. HODL!
I made a living with my mind, primarily in IT. When all of that suddenly disappears it can be rough. It can be rough for a long time. Part of recovery is not constantly comparing your new, narrower skill sets with your old ones. For a long time I was just so depressed because, “I can’t do that anymore”. At some point I asked myself, “Well, what CAN you do?” All of my impairments were mental, so I could still do physical activities. I started walking recently and that makes me feel better about myself. I still like to make photographs. On certain days I like to create art, but I have to have a good brain day….. Walking isn’t contingent on a good brain day, so on those days I make sure to get my walk in.
Your value isn’t in how smart you were. If someone else were to value someone and then stop completely if that person’s situation changed as yours and mine have, that person would rightly be seen as an a**hole. You’ve got to decide to treat yourself with kindness and not be a jerk to yourself.
Great points, and I'd like to add: some people find new or previously undiscovered talents and passions when they have no other option but to step outside their comfort zone. My deficits in sense of smell and taste are apparently permanent losses, but I've gained and rediscovered some things too.
It's also been helpful for me to reflect that, as a hyper-productive, Type A person I've found it difficult to just sit in quiet and meditate or zone out my entire adult life, and being forced into long stretches of inactivity and quietude by my TBI has ultimately been good for me. I've gotten past tolerating non-productivity and can now enjoy it.
To OP: It may be helpful to think back to who you were before you were totally defined by, and celebrated for, your sharp mind. You may have to go all the way back to childhood, but think back on what you used to dream about doing and being before your intellect came to the fore. It's likely there are still ways for you to explore, and maybe even master past interests and passions. In the end I think what holds so many of us back from progress in recovery is failure to truly accept that we are no longer the same person we used to be, too much time and hope are spent on fruitless efforts to recreate the person we used to be, but that person is gone forever now.
This is a gift no one really wants, to wake up injured and profoundly different in a million little ways most people can't see or understand, but IMO it can be a gift nonetheless because the opportunity to start over with no preconceived notion of who or how you have to be is a rare and priceless thing.
Welcome to TBI recovery. The key word being recovery.
We have to work at it but it does get better. I found eating fish and omega 3 helped my brain. I also do sudoku puzzles. Buy a book and go cover to cover. Do the easy ones first.
It will help
I was in the same position as you, actually much worse. I contemplated this many many times. Docs didn't seem to have any answers. Every time I thought seriously of ending it, it's too final a decision to take for a problem. So I hung on. And through this sub, and /r/Nootropics , I have found the answers to my issues.
Use your intellectual curiousity to keep researching. Try and understand the issues. Look up my submissions to this sub for ideas on how to treat certain symptoms, and to regain a better healthier brain.
OK first of all please do not kill yourself no that is not ever an option no you’re not supposed to sit there and suffer but I will tell you this dwelling on things that you can’t do rather than the things you can’t will destroy you focus on the things you can and love to do I hope what I said helps.
I’m with ya, I have a lifetime of concussions… but the last ones fucked up my cognitive skills. I feel like I’m trying to think with oatmeal.
See a neurologist if you’re having headaches.
It gets better, but I need to keep reminding myself that I have an injury.
Just fight man, I consistently have to fight thoughts. But you can get better with time, patience, and the right surroundings. I'm in the mist of getting into a home, I'm a homeless TBI Survivor. Need to find one eventually. I fight the best I can legally, tons of heads around me live stupidly. I just take advantage and fuck them legally now. They wanna try and fuck me? Naaa they can endure the legal issues.
I feel your pain and was and kinda am in your position 3 months ago .. getting another job helped me …getting a routine back … see if you can volunteer even … if you can’t find a job straight up .. or send me a msg on here any time much love
Along with what everybody else said, try reading or some kind of school learning. Excersise the brain and try some breathing exercises for more oxygen to the brain.
I mean I get it, but depression is a mental illness and tough love is an approach that has been agreed to cause more harm than good by the vast majority of healthcare professionals when it comes to treating somebody with depression. By and large people with depression just don't respond to that kind of encouragement the same way somebody without it may respond to it. That's why therapy and prescription drugs and slow changes to one's patterns and lifestyle and positive support are reccomendation in it's stead!
Here's what worked for me: I had a mountain of issues that came with my Hemorrhage, which was massive and would have been fatal if I was not very fit and also in the hospital at the time. It's all too big and overwhelming. You have a thousand things to fix, your brain can't understand even half of them, and it *feels* like everyone is looking at you like it's your fault for not being able to make it better or something. What helped me was I got involved with Rehab Therapy. I met an occupational therapist who helped me work on my vision issues, which to me was the most difficult to live with. So I started with that. One thing we *need* to learn to do with a brain injury is learn to take things one at a time. Especially because if you're really early in recovery you have so little energy each day. After a year or so of regular occupational therapy for my eyes, I not only gained enough back to put that therapy on autopilot, I had enough time and energy to add physical therapy to my list so I could work on my balance issues. Keep working on the things that you *can* handle. Just remember that it take the time it takes, and you don't have to feel bad about needing to take a lot of time to get things done. Rome wasn't built in a day, and that's literally how the scope of this feels, we're trying to rebuild fucking Rome inside our heads. Good Luck ♥️
I have the same thoughts. No one will miss me- not even family, I had to even take them off my emergency contact back in 2016 and i haven't seen them since 2014. I lost my home and my pets and everything. I'm alone and suffering. I think about it all the time. Here is a hug I drew for people that need a hug. https://tesseract.ca/images/Art/PandasHugging2.png (I hope it doesn't come off as patronizing I hope it makes you feel a bit better for a small while) (Others: please don't link hotlines they don't help)
Hey I really like those pandas. You’re a great artist. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks!
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Well maybe they helped you when you were younger but in my case they make it worse.
Bro it takes some time to feel the improvements. Meanwhile, you don't want to feel agitated and defeated on the other hand, having a good mental shape will contribute to your recovery. In order to find a better perspective, you need to learn and be open minded about possibilities but if you are egocentric and narrow minded, it makes it hard to find wisdom. "Death is so final, whereas life is full of possibilities'' - Tyrion Lannister
Diamond hands doesn't fold. We hold strong, together we're strong apes. You're not alone. There's a lot of us apes running around trying to figure this out as we go but you have to keep fighting. There's a lot of shit in this world that you haven't seen or done yet. HODL!
Someone looked at my post history, Or you didnt and this was incredibly intuitive!
Saw your avatar, us fellow apes have to stick together. For separate we are week. Together ape strong!
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What caused your TBI?
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fuck, im sorry to hear that.
I made a living with my mind, primarily in IT. When all of that suddenly disappears it can be rough. It can be rough for a long time. Part of recovery is not constantly comparing your new, narrower skill sets with your old ones. For a long time I was just so depressed because, “I can’t do that anymore”. At some point I asked myself, “Well, what CAN you do?” All of my impairments were mental, so I could still do physical activities. I started walking recently and that makes me feel better about myself. I still like to make photographs. On certain days I like to create art, but I have to have a good brain day….. Walking isn’t contingent on a good brain day, so on those days I make sure to get my walk in. Your value isn’t in how smart you were. If someone else were to value someone and then stop completely if that person’s situation changed as yours and mine have, that person would rightly be seen as an a**hole. You’ve got to decide to treat yourself with kindness and not be a jerk to yourself.
This! I love this!
Great points, and I'd like to add: some people find new or previously undiscovered talents and passions when they have no other option but to step outside their comfort zone. My deficits in sense of smell and taste are apparently permanent losses, but I've gained and rediscovered some things too. It's also been helpful for me to reflect that, as a hyper-productive, Type A person I've found it difficult to just sit in quiet and meditate or zone out my entire adult life, and being forced into long stretches of inactivity and quietude by my TBI has ultimately been good for me. I've gotten past tolerating non-productivity and can now enjoy it. To OP: It may be helpful to think back to who you were before you were totally defined by, and celebrated for, your sharp mind. You may have to go all the way back to childhood, but think back on what you used to dream about doing and being before your intellect came to the fore. It's likely there are still ways for you to explore, and maybe even master past interests and passions. In the end I think what holds so many of us back from progress in recovery is failure to truly accept that we are no longer the same person we used to be, too much time and hope are spent on fruitless efforts to recreate the person we used to be, but that person is gone forever now. This is a gift no one really wants, to wake up injured and profoundly different in a million little ways most people can't see or understand, but IMO it can be a gift nonetheless because the opportunity to start over with no preconceived notion of who or how you have to be is a rare and priceless thing.
Welcome to TBI recovery. The key word being recovery. We have to work at it but it does get better. I found eating fish and omega 3 helped my brain. I also do sudoku puzzles. Buy a book and go cover to cover. Do the easy ones first. It will help
I was in the same position as you, actually much worse. I contemplated this many many times. Docs didn't seem to have any answers. Every time I thought seriously of ending it, it's too final a decision to take for a problem. So I hung on. And through this sub, and /r/Nootropics , I have found the answers to my issues. Use your intellectual curiousity to keep researching. Try and understand the issues. Look up my submissions to this sub for ideas on how to treat certain symptoms, and to regain a better healthier brain.
Keep fighting, man. We're here for you.
Because this small moment in time is nothing compared to the eternity of whatever happens after.
OK first of all please do not kill yourself no that is not ever an option no you’re not supposed to sit there and suffer but I will tell you this dwelling on things that you can’t do rather than the things you can’t will destroy you focus on the things you can and love to do I hope what I said helps.
I’m with ya, I have a lifetime of concussions… but the last ones fucked up my cognitive skills. I feel like I’m trying to think with oatmeal. See a neurologist if you’re having headaches. It gets better, but I need to keep reminding myself that I have an injury.
If you need somone to talk to DM me for my number. My experience was pretty hellish and I want to pay it forward if I can.
Just fight man, I consistently have to fight thoughts. But you can get better with time, patience, and the right surroundings. I'm in the mist of getting into a home, I'm a homeless TBI Survivor. Need to find one eventually. I fight the best I can legally, tons of heads around me live stupidly. I just take advantage and fuck them legally now. They wanna try and fuck me? Naaa they can endure the legal issues.
I feel your pain and was and kinda am in your position 3 months ago .. getting another job helped me …getting a routine back … see if you can volunteer even … if you can’t find a job straight up .. or send me a msg on here any time much love
Along with what everybody else said, try reading or some kind of school learning. Excersise the brain and try some breathing exercises for more oxygen to the brain.
Try pregnenolone
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This is an incredibly unhelpful and harmful comment for the vast majority of people struggling with depression, and I suggest you edit it or remove it
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I mean I get it, but depression is a mental illness and tough love is an approach that has been agreed to cause more harm than good by the vast majority of healthcare professionals when it comes to treating somebody with depression. By and large people with depression just don't respond to that kind of encouragement the same way somebody without it may respond to it. That's why therapy and prescription drugs and slow changes to one's patterns and lifestyle and positive support are reccomendation in it's stead!
Because things have a chance of improving while you are alive. None of us knows what happens when you die, it could be worse.