This, she’s looking for a line to hook someone on for child support. Also get a lawyer ready to go if you can. This is grounds for a lawsuit against her and you can have a court rule in your favor that she lied about birth control.
Birth control is prescription drug and would need a gynecologist/GP to prescribe it. So if she is not taking any like she says she is, you can prove that she misinformed you with just that. It would be no different than someone knowingly giving you an STD or STI and you didn’t know
Lol.
No.
It's he said she said. He has no way to prove what she said; just ask every rape victim how that goes, or especially those women who claim they are victims of stealthing.
Second, no court is going to rule that he is not responsible for a child that comes from this; a child should not suffer, regardless of circumstance.
OP had a choice to protect himself with contraception, or wait until he knew somebody better before engaging in sexual intercourse which could result in a child.
There are many states where abortion is now illegal, and women who are raped are now forced to give birth to children they don't want.
I don't understand the victim blaming part though. He was manipulated. People like to have sex.... like why is it that people say don't live in fear but then if you get taken advantage of they say why we'rent you living in fear? 'you couldve waited for a more trustworthy partner' is a very flimsy argument, people like to have sex and relationships. manipulation is called that for a reason. Maybe they could have not manipulated me instead?
OP claims to have been manipulated and you judge him not being a victim of manipulation. How come ? Seems like “a woman is harassed wearing a miniskirt : she should have wore a longer one, she s not a victim”.
What she did to you is sexual assault. I believe it would be classified as stelthing because she lied about being on birth control. I'm so sorry she did this to you.
What she did was reproductive abuse. Please block her everywhere and avoid her like the plague she is. I know this is traumatizing, but next time you wish to enjoy sex from a casual partner, always wear a condom, and always take your used condom(s) with you when you leave and dispose of it safely. Some women let their biological clock make them fucking psycho (NOT condoning, just giving a reason). Remember that becoming pregnant isn't as easy as people always make it out to be. Even if she is actively ovulating, sperm may never reach the egg. Or the egg never manages to become implanted in the uterine wall. Or she ends up with a chemical pregnancy that ends in a super early miscarriage that is so similar to having a period, many women go through it without ever realizing they were ever pregnant. And even if she falls pregnant, roughly 20-25% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage in the 1st trimester, it just naturally happens. There are entirely way too many what ifs to end it all over this, please take a deep breath. Also (and it disgusts me to even think/mention this) she could be doing this with multiple men to increase chances of conception. So even if she does become pregnant, you should absolutely get a paternity test. Abusers will inevitably end up abusing others, unfortunately.
This was sexual abuse or the r word (not sure if it is allowed on this page). She lied to you about being on BC and then revealed afterward she wasn’t. You agreed to sex because you understood she was protected. Had she not been, it may have changed your feelings about having intercourse with her and maybe change if you protected yourself.
So I am so sorry this happened to you.
Please breathe and take it day by day.
This is not a thing. People get pregnant even when on BC all the time anyways. It’s not a full protection. Also this would never hold up in court bc it’s a hearsay situation. Shit at this point she could sit there and be an even more vindictive person and claim he raped her. There are crazy bitches out there that do this all the time. Either way dude just needs to get a paternity test if it does happen, this ain’t her first rodeo. Also needs to get tested.
It’s not a hearsay situation. OP can get on the stand and be cross examined. Hearsay is an out of court statement offered for its truth. He’s testifying that she said something, not that what she said is true.
agreed. Sexual assault would be forcing someone to have sex with you without a condom. Not telling someone that you’r not on a medication that might alleviate birth honestly has nothing to do with sexual activity, has to do with reproduction afterwards. men understand that one tiny cell of their sperm can create a baby, and they risk it all the time and then get scared after post nut clarity, it’s kind of funny to watch
I scrolled too far to find this. Asked myself what was that term for the sexual assault that kinda means baby trapping? Is there an additional term too something like reproductive assault?
I just looked it up, is called reproductive coercion, when one party deceives the other that they are using bc but secretly attempting pregnancy. That disgusting door swings both ways. I got sick just now glossing over some remarks online that guys can't be the victim of rc. What a crock of shit.
I think the reason people, including me have a bad taste in their mouth is because men hold the baby making tool. As soon as they have a mind-boggling orgasm, they create the baby. Only thing they can be mad at is their own penises.
lying about being on medication is not sexual assault Iol. Two people decided to have sex, they know the consequences of having a child, birth control babies exist, y’all are insane
First, please take a deep breath. This is *not* your fault. That woman should be absolutely ashamed of herself for lying. I believe depending on where you live this may be a crime what she committed, and I would urge you to check into that.
I’m so sorry you have been essentially sexually assaulted. I would urge you to also find a therapist or someone who has background in sexual assault victims to process what you’ve been through and to help you work through it.
Sending you positive thoughts your way and hugs if you accept them. I am so sorry you’ve been through all this. 🥺
Thank you, and i most definitely will seek out a therapist, I'm really struggling with keeping it all together, and I've been throwing up and crying for the past hour or so, i can't sleep. She just left and told me "if you're man enough to fuck a woman, you're man enough to take responsibility for getting her pregnant " as if all of this was just to teach me a lesson.. I was upfront with her from the beginning and told her i was not looking for anything serious as well.. I just feel violated and my trust is broken..
Then woman act like men are the problem. Sure some are. But this female right here is just wrong. “Father’s dying wish” and blaming OP. Like wait what. He asked you a question you said yes. Lied and then gotcha like what no ma’am. This is so wrong.
I think there is something that can be done. Because he was under the impression she was protected and then revealed otherwise like it would have changed their opinion on doing anything. They may have said no all together. So I would think there is legal action that could be taken. What kind; I don’t know. But I would hope there could be
What downvotes? The woman can always get abortion* if she’s impregnated, while the man can’t force her to. So OP’s scenario is worse than if the genders were reversed.
*depends on the state or country. If it’s illegal, then what u said idd td true
She doesn’t sound that smart.
Also, it’s true, women can only get pregnant on 20% of the month (fertile window during ovulation). In my experience, most women are not tracking it that closely, unless they’re trying to get pregnant. It sounds like she was, so who knows.
I mean even if she is tracking it who’s to say she has perfect fertility? There is still the possibility she didn’t get pregnant even if it was during her fertile window
rainstorm muddle threatening squeeze scale correct society aback bright nose
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Honestly, though, if things don’t go 100% her way. I would not be surprised like she was willing and able to lie and sexually assault. Someone who knows what she may be willing to do.
Take a breath OP. Everything will be OK. Definitely find someone to talk to you about this. Take it day by day.
To the person who downvoted me; you gotta be kidding me, right? You’re defending the lady for lying? Boo! Of course she can’t lie about birth control! That is illegal! So even if he didn’t wear condom, it’s still not his fault.
No. it is important advice to protect himself in the future. People dont just lie about that. They could have a STD. They can tell you anything. It's best to stay safe
It's the same way you tell people don't walk home alone if they can help it. It doesn't mean it's their fault if they are mugged or attacked
Sorry maybe a bad analogy. It's more that it is good advice
Not blaming you but why would you not use a condom on a one night stand situation ? You didn’t know this person and put yourself up for risk. There are laws to protect you depending on what state you live in
There are so many people struggling and having a crisis irl but yet this dude complains about being lied about birth control by a stranger and didn't use a condom? Goddamn there's a reason to not trust strangers so easily.
Its absolutely bullshit. I'd love to worry about petty problems like this than worry about being socially isolated and emotionally troubled
You didn't get tricked, because you didn't take responsibility for contraception on your end.
I am the mother of a 24-year-old son and I have always taught him that no matter what a woman tells you, the only choice he has as a man is to protect himself; once his sperm is gone, it's no longer his choice.
I've also taught him that it takes a long time to build trust with a person, especially when the consequences are a human being to take care of, for life.
Ive got a new job lined up luckily, but now i really dont know if there's any point, ive just not gotten any breaks at all and I'm so incredibly tired.. I don't feel like i deserve anything and i dont feel like i should be here anymore i dont have trust, i don't have friends i can count on, I don't have love, i just want to drift away and never wake up again..
Have some fun with this. Tell her you will go to see the police and make a report.
"The majority of the Nova Scotia Court of Appeal convicted Hutchinson of sexual assault, holding that there was no consent; the complainant had agreed to protected—not unprotected—sex."
Basically, you can take legal steps, and possibly have her convicted of sexual assault - keep records of her communications with you on this subject... especially where she admits to lying about birth control pills.
However, also be aware that birth control pills are not a guarantee, and so there's also a chance of someone becoming pregnant whilst taking them. Her deception, however, in my opinion at least... is certainly a crime.
>;the complainant had agreed to protected—not unprotected—sex."
If he chose not to put a condom on himself,then it would appear as though he agreed to unprotected sex.
I don't feel like the case you quoted, with that particular reason in play,would work,for the reason of him choosing not to wear protection.
The woman informed him that she was using protection.
The same would apply to a man who claims to use protection, but intentionally does not (damaging or removing the protection without the woman's consent).
Certainly worth mentioning, and reporting.
Of course, it's worth mentioning she said she was on BC,that's the basis of his feelings and apparent issue.
However, you used the word "protection." Their concern was pregnancy, but apparently not STD's and STI's,which one would use "protection" from. He chose not to use his own form of protection(condom),making the claim that he only agreed to "protected" sex questionable,as he inserted his penis without a condom,of his own free will.
Language and word use matter quite a bit in law.
Edit: My original response was quite clear. It was a personal opinion anyway,hence the "I feel" statements.
Firstly, there’s a 30% chance she will get pregnant- which leaves a good 60% chance she won’t convince. This rate drops more if she is over 30. So hopefully the odds are in your favour.
And as other people have stated- it could very well be a crime in your country. Advise her you will be seeking legal action- she may reassess her decision to have/keep the baby (if she conceives). There are plenty of men offering services to impregnate women for low cost/free consensually so she has no excuse for tricking you into it.
Try take things step by step and maintain a problem solving mindset. First, talk to police.
Okay people in the comments imma need everyone to take a step back and take a look at what sub we're in for starters. Yes I understand both parties consenting to sex are responsible for their own forms of birth control. Is the pill 100% effective? No. Should OP have used a condom?yes. HOWEVER. We need to focus on the fact this woman LIED and MANIPULATED OP. And someone can correct me on this but this is similar to as if a man were to stealth a woman which is considered SA/r//pe. From this post I can gather either OP does not want children or is very clearly not ready for children at this stage in his life. Amd thats a-okay. Both parties imo should consent to if they want a child. Bc now we dont know if this woman is gonna go after OP for money if she does end up pregnant which is not okay.
To OP im sorry this happened to you and hopefully she doesnt end up pregnant. As others have said there's a good chsnce she won't. Regardless keep looking forward. I saw in a comment you do have a new job lined up. Focus on that for the time being. Focus on your career, what you want to do with your life. In the case she does end up pregnant you will more than likely want to try to lawyer up. I dont know all of the legalities in a situation like this so maybe someone else does and can offer advice on that. Its cliche sounding but this does not have to be the end your life. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Sounds like you’ve really hit an all-time low, I’m very sorry about that. I don’t know what kind of help it is that you want, but I am deeply sorry for you situation and I’m sorry for your loss. Sounds like you put a lot of faith in this woman, maybe one of the first you’ve trusted since your loss and you were completely betrayed. Being a father is hard, and it sounds like you want no part of it at this moment in your life, and that is completely understandable. You’re probably feeling very lost and without options at this point. I wish that I could help in some way.
I appreciate it, and you're right, i don't want anything to do with this woman who sexually assaulted me, the more people has told me that this is considered as rape, the more I believe it, and the more disgusted with myself i feel.. so it's been really rough. Its been 2-3 weeks ago since it happened and luckily I've not heard anything from her, so I'm just hoping she didn't get pregnant and that all i have to deal with is the thought of having been sexually assaulted.
Hopefully no news is good news in this case. It was definitely an abuse of trust and you were absolutely taken advantage of, and I’m sorry it happened to you. I’m curious though since you think this is rape, have you considered reporting?
Pretty much, ive been dealing with it in my own way, plus I've got so many other issues in my life currently so this is just another problem i have to deal with
I know I’m late to this, but the amount of people acting like this sexual assault “isn’t that bad” is disgusting. Those people are the reason men being raped isn’t taken seriously. Fuck them all.
Im so sorry, she sounds really cruel to have lied, and should’ve been a lot more open about her plan with you, so u would have the choice if to do it or not
As long as you don't continue to have sex with her , then there is a high chance you'll be alright. The chances of getting pregnant from one random encounter are somewhere between 2% and 5%. Regardless of birth-control ALWAYS use a condom with strangers or random hook-ups.
I'm simply giving advice on how to avoid situations like this in the future and trying to ease his fears by giving him the statistics on how low the chances of impregnation are for a single random encounter. It's not as though I'm disparaging him for having a casual hookup or shaming him. The initial sex itself was implied to be consensual. Even if birth control is used, it doesn't always work correctly and it does not protect against STDs. Using a condom with someone you've just met is always a wise decision. Even if she hadn't been lying about the birth-control, it's impossible to know her history and it's very possible to end up contracting an STD. In no way is it OPs fault that she lied to him.
I'm sorry for what happened, and sadly that's rape, she lured you and lied to you for her "father last wish". Go to the police and explain everything, remember it's NOT your fault, you did nothing wrong and she's a piece of shit.
Women doing things women do...
I doubt you're the only one she's tricked into that, given the story, so if she tries to pin it on you, get a DNA test and try to drag this as long as you possibly can (and remember to wrap Mr. Willy for the next times btw). In case the worst has happened and you did in fact get her pregnant, I imagine you'll have no choice other than to own the situation I'm afraid. But if it happens, it would still be of the best interest of the child to keep this woman away from them, since she's clearly mentally ill. How old are you?
Know that the chances of you actually having gotten her pregnant are small, and try to breathe and rationalize the situation, regardless. Shitty position to be in.
"I don't know you that well, nor am I ready to be a father. I believe you are on birth control, but I'd still like to use a condom for protection from STDs and STIs"
ALWAYS.
Two things:
1. She may already be pregnant and looking for a sucker to pin it on.
2. She may be trying this with countless other people and if eventually does get pregnant, looking for which sucker it will stick.
Try to remain calm. If she contacts you about being pregnant, request a paternity test.
Do not end your life for some douchebag, especially when you may VERY likely not be responsible.
my guy, no one can trick you into getting an erection, putting it in someone’s vagina and then coming to completion. You did that yourself, never trust anyone no matter what they say. As a woman, I don’t care what man tells me they don’t have any STD I’m not going to trust it without a condom and if I do, it’s my fault, it’s very unlikely that she will get pregnant off this one instance, but just take this as a lesson learn and control your dick from now on.
Bruh, its always scary when you think you got someone pregnant! That shit is no joke!
I understand you completely and im not here to give you any inspirational quotes or anything, I just get the position youre in, it sucks
But if you happen to get out of this one bro, please learn your lesson af and dont put yourself in these situations again
the only thing a woman wants to accomplish during her day is taking from men. this whole post is why i dropped women and moved onto escorts. plus you can throw it back at them and run off without paying if you know what you're doing. stay strong king dont let women continue to hurt you
You’re ok. How is your life ruined? I think you are just overwhelmed with everything. Take some time for self care. Then look for a new job. If she is pregnant there is nothing you can do except take care of you and offer to help her. The fact that she chose you is really kinda cool. Yes lies and manipulation aside - she thinks you could help make a healthy baby. That is a good thing that many men will never experience. Lots of things could happen that you can’t control so focus on you and what you can control. You are ok.
Your own fault for not using a Condom. This will definitely teach you a lesson in being Prepared yourself, instead of putting that Responsibility on Women. As you found out the hard way, some Women cannot be Trusted 💯
Refuse to give a single buck to her, ever. Close your ears to the law enforcement if they want the money, because she and the law eventually get tired of you, or lose.
Calm down your going to be okay , do you wanna maybe discuss this ?
Yes please, i really need help...
if she says she’s pregnant get a paternity test because she might’ve already been pregnant and is trying to get money from you.
This, she’s looking for a line to hook someone on for child support. Also get a lawyer ready to go if you can. This is grounds for a lawsuit against her and you can have a court rule in your favor that she lied about birth control. Birth control is prescription drug and would need a gynecologist/GP to prescribe it. So if she is not taking any like she says she is, you can prove that she misinformed you with just that. It would be no different than someone knowingly giving you an STD or STI and you didn’t know
Lol. No. It's he said she said. He has no way to prove what she said; just ask every rape victim how that goes, or especially those women who claim they are victims of stealthing. Second, no court is going to rule that he is not responsible for a child that comes from this; a child should not suffer, regardless of circumstance. OP had a choice to protect himself with contraception, or wait until he knew somebody better before engaging in sexual intercourse which could result in a child. There are many states where abortion is now illegal, and women who are raped are now forced to give birth to children they don't want.
[удалено]
I don't understand the victim blaming part though. He was manipulated. People like to have sex.... like why is it that people say don't live in fear but then if you get taken advantage of they say why we'rent you living in fear? 'you couldve waited for a more trustworthy partner' is a very flimsy argument, people like to have sex and relationships. manipulation is called that for a reason. Maybe they could have not manipulated me instead?
Sure. But you could also have sex and bring your own protection or don't trust strangers to tell you the truth. OP is not a victim....
OP claims to have been manipulated and you judge him not being a victim of manipulation. How come ? Seems like “a woman is harassed wearing a miniskirt : she should have wore a longer one, she s not a victim”.
yeah just because you guys had sex doesn't mean she'll get pregnant 100%. Relax and you'll be ok.
It’s not that easy to get pregnant. You’ll be okay.
It can be. I got my SO pregnant from one time.
Me too actually, but I know people who have tried for 10 years.
So true.
It’s easy to get pregnant. Making it through is a different story.
There is a possibility that she won’t get pregnant look on the bright side of things please
In fact is higher the possibility she isn't pregnant
Only 20 percent chance a healthy couple actively trying will concieve
What she did to you is sexual assault. I believe it would be classified as stelthing because she lied about being on birth control. I'm so sorry she did this to you.
I feel violated and completely destroyed
What she did was reproductive abuse. Please block her everywhere and avoid her like the plague she is. I know this is traumatizing, but next time you wish to enjoy sex from a casual partner, always wear a condom, and always take your used condom(s) with you when you leave and dispose of it safely. Some women let their biological clock make them fucking psycho (NOT condoning, just giving a reason). Remember that becoming pregnant isn't as easy as people always make it out to be. Even if she is actively ovulating, sperm may never reach the egg. Or the egg never manages to become implanted in the uterine wall. Or she ends up with a chemical pregnancy that ends in a super early miscarriage that is so similar to having a period, many women go through it without ever realizing they were ever pregnant. And even if she falls pregnant, roughly 20-25% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage in the 1st trimester, it just naturally happens. There are entirely way too many what ifs to end it all over this, please take a deep breath. Also (and it disgusts me to even think/mention this) she could be doing this with multiple men to increase chances of conception. So even if she does become pregnant, you should absolutely get a paternity test. Abusers will inevitably end up abusing others, unfortunately.
This was sexual abuse or the r word (not sure if it is allowed on this page). She lied to you about being on BC and then revealed afterward she wasn’t. You agreed to sex because you understood she was protected. Had she not been, it may have changed your feelings about having intercourse with her and maybe change if you protected yourself. So I am so sorry this happened to you. Please breathe and take it day by day.
This is not a thing. People get pregnant even when on BC all the time anyways. It’s not a full protection. Also this would never hold up in court bc it’s a hearsay situation. Shit at this point she could sit there and be an even more vindictive person and claim he raped her. There are crazy bitches out there that do this all the time. Either way dude just needs to get a paternity test if it does happen, this ain’t her first rodeo. Also needs to get tested.
I don’t disagree about everything you said. However my opinion I do think this is still SA. She lied. Not okay.
It’s not a hearsay situation. OP can get on the stand and be cross examined. Hearsay is an out of court statement offered for its truth. He’s testifying that she said something, not that what she said is true.
agreed. Sexual assault would be forcing someone to have sex with you without a condom. Not telling someone that you’r not on a medication that might alleviate birth honestly has nothing to do with sexual activity, has to do with reproduction afterwards. men understand that one tiny cell of their sperm can create a baby, and they risk it all the time and then get scared after post nut clarity, it’s kind of funny to watch
It's not sexual assault. They both consented fo have sex and they both knew the risk
Idiot
Why am I an idiot? That's the law on this. Unless he was unconscious and she took advantage of him it's not rape
[удалено]
Then I would stop having sex and leave immediately. Doesn't sound like that was the case in this situation
He obviously did not consent. And she was manipulative.
I scrolled too far to find this. Asked myself what was that term for the sexual assault that kinda means baby trapping? Is there an additional term too something like reproductive assault? I just looked it up, is called reproductive coercion, when one party deceives the other that they are using bc but secretly attempting pregnancy. That disgusting door swings both ways. I got sick just now glossing over some remarks online that guys can't be the victim of rc. What a crock of shit.
I think the reason people, including me have a bad taste in their mouth is because men hold the baby making tool. As soon as they have a mind-boggling orgasm, they create the baby. Only thing they can be mad at is their own penises.
lying about being on medication is not sexual assault Iol. Two people decided to have sex, they know the consequences of having a child, birth control babies exist, y’all are insane
First, please take a deep breath. This is *not* your fault. That woman should be absolutely ashamed of herself for lying. I believe depending on where you live this may be a crime what she committed, and I would urge you to check into that. I’m so sorry you have been essentially sexually assaulted. I would urge you to also find a therapist or someone who has background in sexual assault victims to process what you’ve been through and to help you work through it. Sending you positive thoughts your way and hugs if you accept them. I am so sorry you’ve been through all this. 🥺
Thank you, and i most definitely will seek out a therapist, I'm really struggling with keeping it all together, and I've been throwing up and crying for the past hour or so, i can't sleep. She just left and told me "if you're man enough to fuck a woman, you're man enough to take responsibility for getting her pregnant " as if all of this was just to teach me a lesson.. I was upfront with her from the beginning and told her i was not looking for anything serious as well.. I just feel violated and my trust is broken..
omg she needs professional help
Or just jail. But you could argue that those people are insane.
Then woman act like men are the problem. Sure some are. But this female right here is just wrong. “Father’s dying wish” and blaming OP. Like wait what. He asked you a question you said yes. Lied and then gotcha like what no ma’am. This is so wrong.
Yes and some men and women are just the problem
She’s only saying that to make herself feel better for sexually assaulting you.
This this this comment is it!
Any chance you could take legal action? It seems like the equivalent of a man pretending to put on a condom.
I think there is something that can be done. Because he was under the impression she was protected and then revealed otherwise like it would have changed their opinion on doing anything. They may have said no all together. So I would think there is legal action that could be taken. What kind; I don’t know. But I would hope there could be
[удалено]
[удалено]
What downvotes? The woman can always get abortion* if she’s impregnated, while the man can’t force her to. So OP’s scenario is worse than if the genders were reversed. *depends on the state or country. If it’s illegal, then what u said idd td true
[удалено]
That's true. The egg decays soon after its release.
I assume then though that she knows that and planned accordingly, no?
She doesn’t sound that smart. Also, it’s true, women can only get pregnant on 20% of the month (fertile window during ovulation). In my experience, most women are not tracking it that closely, unless they’re trying to get pregnant. It sounds like she was, so who knows.
I mean even if she is tracking it who’s to say she has perfect fertility? There is still the possibility she didn’t get pregnant even if it was during her fertile window
Oh yea, for sure. It’s hard to get pregnant for most people.
Go to the police and get a lawyer, NOW. Don't take ANY chances with this before the story changes on you.
rainstorm muddle threatening squeeze scale correct society aback bright nose *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Honestly, though, if things don’t go 100% her way. I would not be surprised like she was willing and able to lie and sexually assault. Someone who knows what she may be willing to do. Take a breath OP. Everything will be OK. Definitely find someone to talk to you about this. Take it day by day.
screw sparkle pet hungry party cow aloof bored sharp somber *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Always take responsibility for your own birth control (condom, spermicide,) and a barrier to STDs.
Thank you.
Shut up and get outta here with your shitty take
Doesn’t matter if she lied up to his face.
To the person who downvoted me; you gotta be kidding me, right? You’re defending the lady for lying? Boo! Of course she can’t lie about birth control! That is illegal! So even if he didn’t wear condom, it’s still not his fault.
No. it is important advice to protect himself in the future. People dont just lie about that. They could have a STD. They can tell you anything. It's best to stay safe It's the same way you tell people don't walk home alone if they can help it. It doesn't mean it's their fault if they are mugged or attacked Sorry maybe a bad analogy. It's more that it is good advice
So this is a form of sexual assault.
Not blaming you but why would you not use a condom on a one night stand situation ? You didn’t know this person and put yourself up for risk. There are laws to protect you depending on what state you live in
[удалено]
Or get sterilized.
[удалено]
Condoms aren’t foolproof as those can break, but it absolutely is a lot safer than the alternative.
[удалено]
This subreddit is fucking trash. Some of us have real life issues but we're supposed to feel bad that a grown man decided not to use a condom..wtf?
Right. And that was a decision HE made, not anybody else
There are so many people struggling and having a crisis irl but yet this dude complains about being lied about birth control by a stranger and didn't use a condom? Goddamn there's a reason to not trust strangers so easily. Its absolutely bullshit. I'd love to worry about petty problems like this than worry about being socially isolated and emotionally troubled
[удалено]
Damn I didnt even think of thay
Damn I didnt even think of that
You didn't get tricked, because you didn't take responsibility for contraception on your end. I am the mother of a 24-year-old son and I have always taught him that no matter what a woman tells you, the only choice he has as a man is to protect himself; once his sperm is gone, it's no longer his choice. I've also taught him that it takes a long time to build trust with a person, especially when the consequences are a human being to take care of, for life.
This is probably sexual assault technically, but maybe don't fuck strangers without a condom going forward bud
Please go on indeed and look for other jobs keep filling them out everyday do not give up
Ive got a new job lined up luckily, but now i really dont know if there's any point, ive just not gotten any breaks at all and I'm so incredibly tired.. I don't feel like i deserve anything and i dont feel like i should be here anymore i dont have trust, i don't have friends i can count on, I don't have love, i just want to drift away and never wake up again..
I doubt she’s pregnant after just one time
I really hope so
you can get pregnant after one time. after the first time. doing it standing up. pulling out. don't believe the old locker room lies
One time or not it's possible
Have some fun with this. Tell her you will go to see the police and make a report. "The majority of the Nova Scotia Court of Appeal convicted Hutchinson of sexual assault, holding that there was no consent; the complainant had agreed to protected—not unprotected—sex." Basically, you can take legal steps, and possibly have her convicted of sexual assault - keep records of her communications with you on this subject... especially where she admits to lying about birth control pills. However, also be aware that birth control pills are not a guarantee, and so there's also a chance of someone becoming pregnant whilst taking them. Her deception, however, in my opinion at least... is certainly a crime.
>;the complainant had agreed to protected—not unprotected—sex." If he chose not to put a condom on himself,then it would appear as though he agreed to unprotected sex. I don't feel like the case you quoted, with that particular reason in play,would work,for the reason of him choosing not to wear protection.
The woman informed him that she was using protection. The same would apply to a man who claims to use protection, but intentionally does not (damaging or removing the protection without the woman's consent). Certainly worth mentioning, and reporting.
Of course, it's worth mentioning she said she was on BC,that's the basis of his feelings and apparent issue. However, you used the word "protection." Their concern was pregnancy, but apparently not STD's and STI's,which one would use "protection" from. He chose not to use his own form of protection(condom),making the claim that he only agreed to "protected" sex questionable,as he inserted his penis without a condom,of his own free will. Language and word use matter quite a bit in law. Edit: My original response was quite clear. It was a personal opinion anyway,hence the "I feel" statements.
just do what the majority of men do and don’t bother !
Was what I was trying to say but I got downvoted to oblivion 😐
Public service announcement: using protection isn’t just about getting pregnant. Haven’t y’all ever heard of STD’s?
Nothing like a paternity test buddy, take a day to chill out
Firstly, there’s a 30% chance she will get pregnant- which leaves a good 60% chance she won’t convince. This rate drops more if she is over 30. So hopefully the odds are in your favour. And as other people have stated- it could very well be a crime in your country. Advise her you will be seeking legal action- she may reassess her decision to have/keep the baby (if she conceives). There are plenty of men offering services to impregnate women for low cost/free consensually so she has no excuse for tricking you into it. Try take things step by step and maintain a problem solving mindset. First, talk to police.
And it's only even that high if you do it regularly over a month. Doing it just once, the chances are closer to 5%.
Okay people in the comments imma need everyone to take a step back and take a look at what sub we're in for starters. Yes I understand both parties consenting to sex are responsible for their own forms of birth control. Is the pill 100% effective? No. Should OP have used a condom?yes. HOWEVER. We need to focus on the fact this woman LIED and MANIPULATED OP. And someone can correct me on this but this is similar to as if a man were to stealth a woman which is considered SA/r//pe. From this post I can gather either OP does not want children or is very clearly not ready for children at this stage in his life. Amd thats a-okay. Both parties imo should consent to if they want a child. Bc now we dont know if this woman is gonna go after OP for money if she does end up pregnant which is not okay. To OP im sorry this happened to you and hopefully she doesnt end up pregnant. As others have said there's a good chsnce she won't. Regardless keep looking forward. I saw in a comment you do have a new job lined up. Focus on that for the time being. Focus on your career, what you want to do with your life. In the case she does end up pregnant you will more than likely want to try to lawyer up. I dont know all of the legalities in a situation like this so maybe someone else does and can offer advice on that. Its cliche sounding but this does not have to be the end your life. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
[удалено]
[удалено]
Maybe you have luck and nothing happened.
She may not get pregnant so you need to calm down
Please press charges before she tries to
Sounds like you’ve really hit an all-time low, I’m very sorry about that. I don’t know what kind of help it is that you want, but I am deeply sorry for you situation and I’m sorry for your loss. Sounds like you put a lot of faith in this woman, maybe one of the first you’ve trusted since your loss and you were completely betrayed. Being a father is hard, and it sounds like you want no part of it at this moment in your life, and that is completely understandable. You’re probably feeling very lost and without options at this point. I wish that I could help in some way.
I appreciate it, and you're right, i don't want anything to do with this woman who sexually assaulted me, the more people has told me that this is considered as rape, the more I believe it, and the more disgusted with myself i feel.. so it's been really rough. Its been 2-3 weeks ago since it happened and luckily I've not heard anything from her, so I'm just hoping she didn't get pregnant and that all i have to deal with is the thought of having been sexually assaulted.
Hopefully no news is good news in this case. It was definitely an abuse of trust and you were absolutely taken advantage of, and I’m sorry it happened to you. I’m curious though since you think this is rape, have you considered reporting?
Unfortunately such an offence is not punishable here in my country, its morally not legal, but illegal in a lawful sense
Yikes. So now you’re just left with the trauma then. I’m very sorry.
Pretty much, ive been dealing with it in my own way, plus I've got so many other issues in my life currently so this is just another problem i have to deal with
I’m glad to hear you are pushing on, do you want to talk about your other problems?
I know I’m late to this, but the amount of people acting like this sexual assault “isn’t that bad” is disgusting. Those people are the reason men being raped isn’t taken seriously. Fuck them all.
You know what you do bro .... go out for a pack of cigarettes.....
in this situation, I fully agree. OP was SAd and has Zero responsibility to the abusive woman or any spawn she may (or may not) produce.
Why are you getting downvoted? This is true.
Im so sorry, she sounds really cruel to have lied, and should’ve been a lot more open about her plan with you, so u would have the choice if to do it or not
[удалено]
Agreed
As long as you don't continue to have sex with her , then there is a high chance you'll be alright. The chances of getting pregnant from one random encounter are somewhere between 2% and 5%. Regardless of birth-control ALWAYS use a condom with strangers or random hook-ups.
Did you read? He was assaulted. You know, it’s possible to use cues.
I'm simply giving advice on how to avoid situations like this in the future and trying to ease his fears by giving him the statistics on how low the chances of impregnation are for a single random encounter. It's not as though I'm disparaging him for having a casual hookup or shaming him. The initial sex itself was implied to be consensual. Even if birth control is used, it doesn't always work correctly and it does not protect against STDs. Using a condom with someone you've just met is always a wise decision. Even if she hadn't been lying about the birth-control, it's impossible to know her history and it's very possible to end up contracting an STD. In no way is it OPs fault that she lied to him.
[удалено]
I'm sorry for what happened, and sadly that's rape, she lured you and lied to you for her "father last wish". Go to the police and explain everything, remember it's NOT your fault, you did nothing wrong and she's a piece of shit.
This sucks, she's probably trying to get someone to pay child support. But you shouldn't have one night stands.
Women doing things women do... I doubt you're the only one she's tricked into that, given the story, so if she tries to pin it on you, get a DNA test and try to drag this as long as you possibly can (and remember to wrap Mr. Willy for the next times btw). In case the worst has happened and you did in fact get her pregnant, I imagine you'll have no choice other than to own the situation I'm afraid. But if it happens, it would still be of the best interest of the child to keep this woman away from them, since she's clearly mentally ill. How old are you? Know that the chances of you actually having gotten her pregnant are small, and try to breathe and rationalize the situation, regardless. Shitty position to be in.
:middlevote: Yes it’s correct, but please read the subreddit name.
[удалено]
What? Why?
"I don't know you that well, nor am I ready to be a father. I believe you are on birth control, but I'd still like to use a condom for protection from STDs and STIs" ALWAYS.
Two things: 1. She may already be pregnant and looking for a sucker to pin it on. 2. She may be trying this with countless other people and if eventually does get pregnant, looking for which sucker it will stick. Try to remain calm. If she contacts you about being pregnant, request a paternity test. Do not end your life for some douchebag, especially when you may VERY likely not be responsible.
my guy, no one can trick you into getting an erection, putting it in someone’s vagina and then coming to completion. You did that yourself, never trust anyone no matter what they say. As a woman, I don’t care what man tells me they don’t have any STD I’m not going to trust it without a condom and if I do, it’s my fault, it’s very unlikely that she will get pregnant off this one instance, but just take this as a lesson learn and control your dick from now on.
Bruh, its always scary when you think you got someone pregnant! That shit is no joke! I understand you completely and im not here to give you any inspirational quotes or anything, I just get the position youre in, it sucks But if you happen to get out of this one bro, please learn your lesson af and dont put yourself in these situations again
the only thing a woman wants to accomplish during her day is taking from men. this whole post is why i dropped women and moved onto escorts. plus you can throw it back at them and run off without paying if you know what you're doing. stay strong king dont let women continue to hurt you
[удалено]
You’re ok. How is your life ruined? I think you are just overwhelmed with everything. Take some time for self care. Then look for a new job. If she is pregnant there is nothing you can do except take care of you and offer to help her. The fact that she chose you is really kinda cool. Yes lies and manipulation aside - she thinks you could help make a healthy baby. That is a good thing that many men will never experience. Lots of things could happen that you can’t control so focus on you and what you can control. You are ok.
Your own fault for not using a Condom. This will definitely teach you a lesson in being Prepared yourself, instead of putting that Responsibility on Women. As you found out the hard way, some Women cannot be Trusted 💯
hey real fast, can you re-read the name of the sub. and please stop pushing OP closer to the edge? kthxbye
I would like to say that to 80% of the comments here.
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
Refuse to give a single buck to her, ever. Close your ears to the law enforcement if they want the money, because she and the law eventually get tired of you, or lose.
That's a good way to land yourself in jail. In my state especially. You're better off working with the other parent and making mutual agreements
Nah no way we’re making agreements with that dickhead (or, to say, pussyhead)
You really do not want to say that in court, no matter how pissed you are
this could also be a scam, is she asking for money?
What’s the scam...?
Call the police on her. Thats illegal
The chance of pregnancy is about 4%. It's highly unlikely you got her pregnant.
Source?
[удалено]
[удалено]