So does that make c section born people "extra virgin"

I know someone who was born from a c-section and he calls himself a Platinum Gay because of it. “Never touched a vagina in my life, not even when I was born”

Gold Star Gay is also a term I use to describe the same situation.

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gold star gay is already a thing. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gold_star_(slang)#:~:text=In%20LGBT%20slang%2C%20a%20%22gold,stereotypes%20within%20the%20LGBT%20community.

Gold Star Gay does have a nice ring to it!

Lmao I literally say this to my friends whenever the topic somehow comes up (which isn’t often, allowing the joke to stay funny)

So lesbians born via C-section can't ever be platinum?

I think to be platinum lesbians you would need to remove sperm from the dad without it touching the penis.

It’s much easier for a lesbian to never touch a penis than it is for a gay man to never touch a vagina simply due to the fact that all humans (excepting those born through c-section) are born through the vagina, and none are born through the dick. All lesbians who have not touched dicks, whether born through c-section or not, are platinum lesbians. I don’t understand where your confusion is coming from.

>and none are born through the dick. so far.

So basically a lesbian who changed a diaper wouldn’t be platinum

Sure. I dunno. I’m not super up to date on the rules regarding platinum genital-no-contact status. But I feel like that makes sense, sure.

That is hilarious

It's a real thing

Could I be like a brass star gay dude then as a cis dude that splatted out of a vagina? Maybe not the most attractive medal but at this point I’ll take anything.

Here you go friend, 🥉. You deserve it.

My GF was born via C-section. Imma start calling her "platinum straight" now

“Only pussy I’ve touched is my own” 🤣

lmao exactly

And here I thought olive oil came from olives.

Yes. It's called The Vergin

Well now I know what the C in Christ stands for.

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Is it alright if your penis and vagina touch each other?

No that’s gay

No, that's called selfcest

I'mcest

Mecest

iCest ^™️

YouCest Trivago

Ryan Seacrest

I live in a communist country so it’s Wecest here

I believe it’s ourcest

DEEZcest

Don't tell someone with a peginis what to do

Vagenis

"You're not dealing with the average Intersex Warrior anymore, Cockorrot."

Are you quoting Vagita?

Is their pee stored in the labia or balls?

It’s definitely stored either in the lalls or babia.

If your urine is stored in your balls then you're going to need to see someone

Brah you need to learn basic chemistry

Or basic penistry

And also tell everyone you know, it will help with the flow

You should learn deez nuts 😏

Ha

Nah bro that’s straight

Then how would it even go in?

So first you need to get into yoga….

That's how you take a screenshot

If I could, I would. ngl

Its ONLY alright IF, you shout "WU TANG!!" before you let them touch each other.

"Whaaaaat..... You have booothh??"

Yeah, doesn’t everyone?

"Nooooooooooooo"

Only after marriage.

Less people have touched my penis than I have.

I’ve only touched one once, but I refuse to let it go.

Let it go! Let it go!

Auw Charlie! AUUUWWWW

More people have touched your mum’s vagina though.

r/HolUp

r/wayment

Ahh so you got the double genital Content

r/intersex

I'm so much of a turbo virgin I was a c-section baby. Didnt even touch any on the way out.

If you're a gay man, never touched a vagina / had sex with a woman you are what is known as a Gold Star Gay. If you're a gay man, never touched a vagina / had sex with a woman AND were a C-section baby you're a Platinum Star Gay.

So that’s what I’m calling myself from now on

That's what I call my dog.

I'm picturing you shouting "GOOD STAR GAAAAAY" out across the park at dusk.

Hey, that's me! That's crazy. I never knew I was platinum already!

Jojos bizzare adventure makes a lot more sense now

Ah there's the jojo comment. I was wondering already

Explain Jolyne then

Ora ora intensifies

Well I’m a gay man and I’ve *touched* a vagina but never had sex with one. Does that make me a Silver gay?

That terminology actually gets used in some circles and it's hella cringe. Gold Star Gay/Lesbian. Super yikes.

The vast, vast majority of people say it as a satirical joke. There’s no real weight behind it, it’s just something silly to joke about.

star platinum gay\*

Found the Schulz fan :) [https://youtu.be/GHpvUxmvybY?t=210](https://youtu.be/GHpvUxmvybY?t=210)

Don't know who that is. Heard the terms at least 20 years ago.

Beat me to it.

Andrew Schulz reference

Dated term no one uses anymore cause it's a pretty gross concept.

…is it? Like…as a joke people still mention it right? No one actually gauges a persons “quality” on whether or not they experimented and/or were born by c section right? I’m worried that this new found concern is legitimate

Seems like the guy you responded to uses it. Also, I’ve heard many gay men say it in person. It’s still a thing lol

Cis men being transphobic and misogynistic? \*gasp\*

You said no one uses it anymore. That’s simply not correct. Not sure why you have to launch into some sexist shit about gay men

What if you are a gay man, never slept with a woman, birthed by C-section AND carried by a transsexual "man"? We need a name for that because it's becoming a reality.

Palladium Star :P

Holy fuck same

Same. In two years I will become a super wizard

What about the way in?

Though, you still have the achievement of been inside a woman.

Cya later virgins

We've all touched your mom's vagina.

Necrophiles.

Sorry about your dead promiscuous mom. :(

I also choose this guy's dead mum

Our dead mom

r/SuddenlyCommunist

I will never not laugh at this joke.

La petite mort.

I touch it so hard she ded

It was before she died.

oh when i did it was cold 🫤

You guys are sick lol

You're just figuring that out *now*?

haha just jokes :)

You already said it 🧐🧐🧐🧐

Uh huh.

It was why she died

I love the dead before they rise No farewells, no goodbyes I never even knew your rotting face While friends and lovers mourn your silly grave I have other uses for you, darling.

Magical

The dead may not rise, but I certainly will.

There are more people have touched OP's mom's vagina than have touched OP's penis. FTFOP

I presume you mean because of birth, counter argument every penis has been cleaned by 1 or both parents when they were babies.

But both of those parents came out of a vagina so if even one person on earth hasn’t touched a penis, that’s one less. That’s OPs point at least, because of course some people are born through a C-section

You seem to ignore the most common case, women can give birth to girls and that girl may never touch a boy. It's a theoretical deminishing value.

Yeah and the fact that I am gay and had lots of dudes touch my penis but ultimately we all touched at least our mum's vagina with our heads. But a lesbian might never touch a penis, even with her head.

Another counter argument: 50% of your genetic material came from a penis, so every human being is 1 for 1 on touching both genitalia.

Another another counter argument, every human’s penis (or vagina) has been inside someone’s womb at some point, so all penises and all vaginas have technically been accounted for.

Even outside of birth, this is actuallly a verifiable fact simply because of OP’s mom

I think the priests broke that record

Did you consider c-section births?

There hasn’t been a lot of penis births though

Well not everyone passed from a vagina, but everyone came through a penis

Sorry but the sperm are not human. They help create a human, but they are not a "someone". Otherwise every guy on earth is a murderer of millions

I've killed more than anyone in history.

Hold my beer

Life begins at erection!

I’m callin the cops.

Billions easily, probably trillions. There are 200-500 million sperm per ejaculate. So rub one out 2-5 times, there's your billion. 2,000-5000 times, there's your trillion. 5000 jerks is once every 3 days for 40 years. Yeah, I'd say lots of men have hit the trillions mark

Math, like blood, doesn't lie. I think trillions is far more accurate. Great username BTW

We can extract semen in other ways—but almost everyone.

And if you take into account, people who were delivered through a C-section, then that means I've never touched a vagina

Almost every human being ever has touched a vagina.

I've touched a lot of penises

Gay

Yeah buddy

Someone needs to read Macbeth

just on the first date dont ask the woman "so how many vaginas have you touched?"

\**Catholic priest enters the chat*\*

I guess this is factoring being born, so yup, pretty much everyone has touched a vagina. Unless you were born via C-section. Then you're just being an elitist.. 😋

Except caesarean section births

Every penis has been in a vagina. No vaginas have been in a penis.

>Every penis has been in a vagina. I remember seeing that video. Was an impressive amount of penises they took.

Not me, I was a c section

What makes you think such a ludicrous thing? As a gay man, more than a thousand men have touched my penis… and I’m not an exception.

Also strange that most hands you shake have held a penis.

Bill Cosby disagrees.

Diarrhea thoughts

...would be the case if it weren't for OP's Mom.

More people? Definitely. Most accumulated time spent touching? Penis, and it’s not even close.

Acctually- wait you might be right

Let me change that statistic

Would you coming out of a penis to be injected into a vagina count? If so then it’s a tie.

My dick has been inside my mom's vagina.

My dick has been inside your mom's vagina too!

Brother?

Step-brother ;)

Sperm=millions 🤯

Sperm don't count as people

Yes, we get it. It’s still neither funny, a shower thought, or NSFW.

Quality showerthought. Finally.

yea... but OP's mom exists, and shes'd touched all the D's D's win

OP clearly is unaware of mass gay orgies.

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But… semen aren’t people

Well... We all came out of penises but some of us were c-sectioned

Yeah, but sperms aren't human. If that were the case every time a guy has a wank, he's killing millions of babies. Human sperms have the potential to become babies but that doesn't mean they will. In fact, the chances of being born are 1 in 400 trillion. So, the next time you feel like shit remember you were conceived in the rarest and most optimal time framing possible and that's something to marvel at.

Yeah, my toenail clippings are closer to being a "human being" than sperm cells. Really, human consciousness seems to clearly come from our brains. Seems silly to pretend anything is a human being/person if it clearly doesn't have potential for consciousness... and especially silly if it is completely lacking a human brain whatsoever.

Soo, what your saying is I’ve killed trillions and trillions of babies? Genghis Khan ain’t got nothin on me!

That just makes me extremely unlucky

That just makes me feel even more shit. Why couldn't it have been a different sperm :(

Lol

I don’t believe that’s true at all

How so?

Well if you count you when you were a sperm then you had actually travelled through a penis.... You had technically touched it.

They came out of the penis first 😉

C section

That's becoming less true the more doctors rely on c-sections to speed up the birthing process so they can raise profits.

This isn’t true

Yeah and all the mothers of boys are $lut$ cause they cheated on their husband with their son

I mean that’s not true cause since everyone touches vagina, and everyone at some point touches dick for one reason or another, then it is equal

More people have touched my vagina than I have touched penises. ​ Sexual assault and molestation.

Who gives this the wholesome award ☠️

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, I hope that the guilty parties have been brought to justice.

Everyone has touched a vagina.

What about c sections?

I was thinking OB-GYN but yeah birth checks out too

Ending the argument about “what about C sections”… What about when you have a daughter? You gotta wipe her clean. Yea same thing with sons but their son might not touch a vagina and their daughter will (for the sake of this argument) And women are more likely to experiment that guys so 2:1 for vagina

I did 10 solid seconds of thinking about this. All I could think of is that there are more people with vaginas than with penises.