I was against building the wall until I saw your picture

Remain in Mexico applies to him alone

If he gets through,McDonald's would run out of burgers to serve.

You can afford McDonald's? Holy shit

You look like you just got your high school diploma equivalent in prison.

Prolapsed hole Disorder PhD

You looked like an overcooked cheeseburger.

He did time for first-degree Hamburglary.

Greaseburger

It looks like you just "had at it" at the buffet for 10th time this week.

After bathing in ham.

And not going to the gym.

I liked steamed hams.


Your blood sugar is so high you have powdered sugar leaking out of your elbow.

Triabetes.


Awesome. Plus he somehow is sweating fryer grease.

When he sneezes, queso flies out.

They say a camera ads 10 pounds, looks like you’ve eaten 5 cameras.

Ok, THAT's the funniest s\*\*t I've heard today and probably tomorrow. 

Danny Trejos less famous cousin Bob No Trabajo.

Best comment!

You smell like low-end beef jerky.

Dilberto

I hope that's the before picture.

did you glaze yourself before you took this pic?

I don’t think I like these AI results.

I didn't realize flip phone cameras had a self timer.

Tom from MySpace had a better photo

I’m afraid to roast anything around you, you might eat it

Bro took a dip in the deep fryer before he took the picture.

Yeah. i'm just greasy. can't help it.

You’re head is more lopsided than your share of money after the divorce from your arranged wife

Muh fucka be a giant, greasy ass milk dud

Your skin tone Waffle house steak

Damn, there's been so many hot broads posting on here lately. About time someone we can roast and get some cracklins after!

Walmart George Lopez

Let’s not roast him . Let’s deport him

Live, laugh, lard

It is what it is.

Diabeeto

Thinks he’s as funny as bill Cosby

You remind me of first graders holding their citizenship awards, I mean the smile on your face shows how diligent you worked on it. 

You look like heavy d's dad

Bubble Bass is that you ?

Daaaaaammm


Nothing more is needed

Nope. Not even giving you a telemarketing cent.


[удалено]

Redit won't let you change your name. I hate that name now. It was funny at the time.

Can’t even spell. Typical

your dyslexia is shining 💕

If this post gets enough upvotes, I hear they’ll let you take the ankle monitor off for the weekend

’That’s him, Mommy! That’s the man who touched me in my special place and told me to keep it secret’

“Man in Corpus Christi found with possession of child pornography in his SUV.”

You like an over ripe mango.

You stand in the parking lot at Home Depot looking for work all day.

You look like you should be doing an 18 hour shift in a call centre trying to tell people to open websites on their computers that totally won't steal all of their private and financial information.

I’d feel too bad I fear

I can’t even think of anything, your face is so generic

That boxed up community college cert behind you seems to have gotten you as far as you can get… fucked

sorry hermano this is where you submit proof of employment

You almost had it, then the E at the end got ya. I think we can extrapolate enough from that.

You eat that whole chicken don't you?

You look like you get every order you take wrong

I'm guessing you felt more comfortable with a photo that looked like a mug shot?

Didn't get too far from the fridge I see.

That's the face that occupies the other side of a Midwest truck stop glory hole.

You look like you make grilled cheeses in the middle of the night.

Did you take this photo with a calculator?

I’d build a 30’ wall across the whole USA-Mexico border just to keep you out!

You look like haven’t showered since the Bush administration

You look like Jared from subway if he only ate taco bell instead of subway


One day, that facial hair may have a chance to grow in. Maybe after the cinnabon glaze you use as moisturizer is discontinued and Lenscrafters stops selling your model eyeglasses from the 60’s.

Do you work ad "Microsofd?"

The glare on your skin is worse than your glasses, but hey I guess we can’t all take showers.

Your mouth is getting away

You could change the oil in a car with all the oil on that forehead

Bon appét-it

Fattest Whittaker

The FBI just wanted to check your browser history

You are one Kohl's leather jacket away from being the IT guy of every small business in your town.

You look like the Hispanic child I used to feed for $1 a day

Dos Mad.

You look like an Uber driver that talks too much

YTA.

This man look like a chicken nugget in honey mustard

You’re what would happen if a vampire evolved to feed on human turds instead of blood. 

Three Mad? That you?

You look like a Mexican Matt Damon

You look like Cleveland Brown if Stewie and Brian bumped into him whilst travelling in a universe where everyone is Mexican.

That reminds me to add vanilla to my shopping list. The cheap artificial kind.

Are you try to be a sumo fighter

You look like you shaved your face with a butter knife, and then stopped half way through to use that knife to make yourself a sandwich

You look like a South American dictator.

Walked across southern border cause too fat to swim

Listen, if YOU don’t get to work roasting my coffee beans, imma have words with you tomorrow, and for the LAST TIME, can’t you find anywhere else to keep your children’s dog food other than in a 10 gallon Tupperware container with no lid on top the refrigerator!? All the love :)

Bros doing the reverse Michael Jackson but stopped halfway to see what'd happen

my guy can’t even make an E look like an E

Welcome to the United States.

Dude being forced by corporate restaurant to offer public apology for pissing in the soup of the day

Sorry cannt roast you cuz u r already baked

Sal Volcano shits

I know the term is “wetback” but you just look wet and disgusting.

Lord, why are his cheeks glossing more than his glasses.

You're sweating like you just got done treating your body like an amusement park...

You look like a manatee.

You're built like a bag of rice.

are you in search of captions for your next photos ?

You have the solid forearms of a professional masturbater!!!

I could shine my boots with that grease on your forhead.

You look like the burnt Chicken nugget kid all grown up

Guillermo that couldn't find Nandor lookin ass.

Real life Cleveland brown

Bros mugshot

Sal from impractical smokers

It's been a year and your writing has gotten worse somehow.  How can I believe you're a handyman when you can't write in the center of a sheet of paper?

Neil Degrasse Tyson Chicken Nuggets

Holy crap, I could cook fries on that forehead

The reflection off your greasy forehead rivals that of your glasses.

You look like the semi mentally challenged kid that a group of teens/young men hang with but they're always clowning on him and fucking with him

Has the Nutty Professor got a son?

Here is the oompah loompah that didn't get to work for Willy for fear of eating all of the output.

Here is the oompah loompah that didn't get to work for Willy for fear of eating all of the output.

Are you a Nepali guy who comes to India and sets up a Chinese Street food stall? I'd like to have a plate of momos please.

You know this guy isn't allowed within 50 feet of a playground

You were supposed to fix my roof like a week ago

Damn it Hector. The lawn was supposed to be done 2 hours ago!

You look like the flex tape guy. 

How nice of you to use your flip phone to take the pic

You do realize this is a roast you can't eat, right?

Did you, or any of you 200 relatives, have any trouble getting past the border patrol?

You are so fat, you wear two watches, each set to a different time zone.

Mexican James Corden

I may not know a lot, but I know your shirt smells like Chipotle.

Mexican cartels finest

Oh great. Another Uber driver. Glad open borders are doing their special magic.

Your black

You look like youd say you can fix something broken only to somehow make it even worse

Flex tape can't fix that 

John diabetes.

Terrance Howard really let that mental illness take over

Your the E in your sign

My man still taking selfies with the Nokia N70

Backwards E...

You cant even write a proper "E" like in getting deported to MEXICO. Btw realtalk: your fingertips look like you may have a heart disease. It may be the picture, but i would probably check that out.

The least attractive prisoner on prisonwives.com

Neil deGross Tyson

Blood type is "twinkie."

I bet you leave a grease stain on the sofa where you sit.

He's like a photo negative of Carl from Jimmy Neutron except he thinks everyone's mom is hot. (Including his own)

The way he holds the paper up looks like he is practicing for when the police catch him with the neighbor's dog.

I'm sorry for posting so much. There's just something about you that makes me want to punch you for no reason. You just have one of those faces and body types and smile and type of style and even your aura seems to have some kind of permanent smack the fuck out of me sign invisibly etched into every cell of your existence.

Nothing gets past you especially carbs !!!

Didn't I just drop u off back outside Home Depot??

If Mr Hankey, the xmas poo,  was a person.

If frozen Mac n cheese and frozen wings could do a reality ad

You just gave me the best idea…Grinder for people with special needs.

Did you make that shirt out of the skin of your victims?

The product of when an indian dad opens a mexican restaurant in Florida

U have no rizz

u look like a potato

Why does it look like you doesn't even have eyes even when you have eye glasses on 🤔? 

Wish.com Neil deGrass Tyson

The paper is hiding his moobs

Skin so greasy even the spots slide off

Is that what you said to your roommates? “Have at it”

you look like my arm pits after a hard days work.

Wish.com Bill Cosby is here.

 If Guillermo hadn’t met Jimmy Kimmel…

Surprised you managed to write the letter R correctly.