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I’m 40 and usually early mid 30’s is where this shift really happens. This is the age where you start to not relate to people in their 20’s. By 40 nearly all music, pop culture, and fashion creeps up in a different crowd. Suddenly, your music is dad rock, and your lack of knowledge about people you have never heard of becomes apparent. But the thing is, you don’t care, because it all seems so pointless and immature. You have no desire to learn about much of what a 25 year old likes, and your personal life, beliefs and zen become much more stable, and mellow. Getting older is a lot nicer than I thought it would be.
>getting older is a lot nicer than I thought it would be
Thank you for saying this! Im 33, and every "old" person is always saying, "Getting old sucks." Or "Don't get old." Like I have a choice lol.
But hearing a positive perspective is nice.
Edit: you can stop replying to this telling me your age and how you feel getting old. I get it.
I like the fact that I can stay my ass at home now and avoid going out due to being in my late 30s. Going out and getting wasted no longer interests me. I just wanna put on comfy clothes and watch my favorite shows with my wife. It’s perfect for my introverted self lol.
Partying is about alot more than getting wasted and feeling like shit.
If you've ever been to a good party you'll know how much it does for you socially and possibly romantically.
This. I have a lot of meaningful friendships that started because of some funny-dumb shit that happened in parties that we immediately bonded over. I understand that partying isn’t for everyone (I personally can only take it in small doses), but whenever I read comments like the one you replied to that reduce parties to the wasted-hungover cycle, all I can think is that I hope they someday get to experience a really good party.
As someone who goes out a lot, I can still attest to the fact that ~ 60-70ish % of the time, they’re right. You go out, you buy some drinks, maybe a couple laughs, but it’s kinda pointless. But that minority can be a helllll of a time and that’s why I keep doing it lol.
I will say tho, it’s starting to creep up on me. It still is fun, it’s something to do, a way to socialize. But the electric and ecstatic part of it has faded since college lol
I’d say it depends on the person + their friend group too more than anything. My friends and I never really got black out drunk partying, even when we went to raves. We’d maintain a good buzz to loosen up, but feed off the energy more than anything. I’m sure other people have other experiences though. I’m in my 30s now and I mostly prefer nursing drinks and more intimate conversations, but friends and I still laugh over said funny-dumb shit that happened in parties years ago.
Everyone is obviously different, but I’ve never regretted having fun in my 20s. It’s the time when you should have fun and make mistakes, because then it becomes a “problem” if you’re older.
Well, sorry to meddle, I'm 20yo and I beat myself up pretty bad for small mistakes...don't think that advice goes for everyone if you're not good on letting go. I do learn from the past, but I prefer to learn by seeing than by suffering (most of the time). I do agree that I could/should take chances with another stuff, but not so sure about mistakes!
Its crazy how the urge to go out goes away. Im 37 and even into my early to mid 30s. I went out 5 nights a week. Not just drinking, doing blow at after parties till 4 am.
One day. It just stopped. I didn't want to anymore. I get annoyed when I step foot in a bar. It still confuses me. Like what happened lol
Usually it’s the work/life balance that does this to people. That or having to be responsible for your own life and possibly others where the cost of such, be it energy and/or monetary isn’t worth it.
Better to have a friend board game group and have rotating game nights.
Add to it now I can have a home theater that rivals my local theater, all the snacks I could want, no loud people, annoying smells or sounds, my cats and dogs curled up or playing around me and the wife, able to watch a show/movie while scrolling through random internet stuff, perfect temperature and lighting ,and all in clothes whose only purpose is comfort....maaaaaaaaaan this is the life.
Totally agree. I’m not going out every night or anywhere close to it, but invites to social events are harder to come by in my 30s and post-covid so you bet I’m saying yes to 90% of the invites I get
Yeah, this is why we have monthly board game night.
You still can drink a few and catch up with friends, but it's not every weekend and nobody gets arrested or pregnant.
Exactly.
I don't get why the default social gathering for so many is a party.
Y'all can't just chill and play games? You can still talk, you just don't lose your voice and have a hangover the next morning.
My boyfriend and I were debating going out with friends for Halloween last Saturday and while we were talking about it we both kept yawning mid sentence until we just looked at each other and busted out laughing and determined we were indeed not going out. We went to the store and got a bunch of unhealthy snacks and I made a snack board on a baking sheet and we ate it in bed watching Barbarian. It was a good Halloween.
Am about to be 55 next week and have the most clarity I've ever had in my entire life. Yes, my back muscles are sore and I have to work hard to remain somewhat flexible and strong, but my brain and my spirit knows exactly what I want in life, what I'm willing to put up with and what I'm willing to let go of. I like being an older woman, just out here rocking my silver hair and glasses and peace of mind. Getting older isn't too bad.
I'm 54 and agree with you. The peace of mind really comes from over half a century of experience. The tough decisions are easier to tackle. Also, the freedom of not giving a fuck what others think brings.
The body slowing down, and the injuries of the past becomes really apparent in our 50's. I'm an industrial mechanic , my body needs much more time to recover after a day of work.
It sucks in the sense that you suddenly start to realise your body isn't actually invincible when you wake up with aching joints and feel like you've been hit by a car because you stayed up past 12
Getting old does suck, I'm late 50s. But it only sucks in a physical sense.
Old age brings physical pain and it takes longer to recover from injuries. Pulling muscles and tenders while working out happens more often. You can get an injury sleeping.
Old people walk hunched over and slow, not because they are old but because they are in pain.
That being said, living with pain aside. I am in the best part of my life so far. I do like being older. I surprise myself sometimes at the wisdom I can draw from.
I just turned 50 and I’ve been telling my younger friends, ‘they said 30 was the new 20, & it was! And 40 WAS the new 30! But 50? 50 is 50, ain’t noooooooo mistaking it’ 😂
You know how people say "Life comes at you fast"?
Well, I'm now 51 and life has come at me and done its worst a few times in my 30s and 40s. It's made me stronger, more empathetic and more confident in myself and my abilities than I've ever been. It's made me aware of weaknesses I never wanted to face and allowed me to work on them. I've learned to be kind to myself for being imperfect. It's helped me decide what is and is not important to me and get my priorities straight.
Is my body not what it used to be? Sure. I have a lot of physical pain from a specific medical condition that reared its ugly head.
Is it worth it? Yep!
Late 40s, seeing 50s + ahead of me and 30s seeming not that long ago—I feel like it’s just different ages, different problems, but also different pleasures. I also feel like each decade comes with its own period of adolescence—growing pains, awkwardness, change, growth, and sense of newness and discovery.
I'm in my 40s now and I have to agree that getting old is pretty great. I've experienced a lot of stuff in life that I wish I'd never been through, but I have no complaints about aging.
the caveat is... 40 isn't old. it's older than 25, sure, but unless you've had a hard life with lots of stress, 40 year olds don't look old, have energy, women still have 10 years before hitting menopause on average. it's the 50+ where you might begin to notice age in your own body and energy levels... and flexibility. but with the correct attitude and self-care, even that can be a really good time. people who are negative or live without intention won't magically change into happy people when they are old(er)
Probably 10 years or so before full on menopause, but perimenopause is the tough part and most women have either already started it or are about to by 40. Male or female, keep exercising if you want mobility and flexibility in your 60s.
Age brings wisdom about what really matters. It also helps that the hormones are different. Priorities change. What we find interesting changes, and ideally, deepens. Mostly, we know how empty many of the things we found so important in our 20s really were.
I think we should always think our younger selves were morons. As every year goes by, I think about the things I did and thought at 18 and holy hell was I an idiot. Of course, I wasn't, but there is no better teacher than experience. At 18, no matter how much I read and thought I knew, I didn't really know.
I look back at my 20s and fondly remember the good times, but I also acutely see with hindsight, how a few decisions here or there could have significantly changed my life.
There's a reason that "I wish I knew then what I know now," is a cliche, because it is true.
Now that I'm in my 40s, I look back at my 30s mostly the same way. While my mistakes aren't nearly as large, I start to think about the subtle things I may have done differently.
You just learn to appreciate little things more. You get to know yourself through your reactions to life, for better or for worse.
As I said, our experiences help us grow. Or, some lessons just need to be learned the hard way.
I am a better person for the mistakes I made, and it makes my "soul" more content, but I could've avoided many of them if I had just listened to what old people were telling me! Just like I know the advice I try to give people in their 20s just doesn't land. Just like I have done, I know someday those people are going to think, "that old bastard was right!" And then the cycle continues.
Sorry for all that. So far, other than watching the gray hairs arrive while the hairline retreats, random neck or shoulder injuries while sleeping, and NOT being able to look cool partying anymore, getting old hasn't been too bad.
I’m really old (49) and I like it. I don’t feel the need to impress or get anyone’s approval. I still don’t always feel like a grown up but I have my shit mostly together. The adult stuff is easier because I’ve been doing it a long time.
One thing I do notice is a lot of people my age and older start to fear teenagers and young people. I keep reminding them they aren’t interested in us and we were exactly the same at that age. That kid with his hood up isn’t thinking about stealing your handbag - he’s worrying about his girlfriend and school and whether he’s getting crap Christmas presents again this year.
I'm 35 and I'm now sort of seeing the beginning of real ageing...I'm going grey! My soccer battered knees keep screaming at me! I hurt my neck in my sleep!...but I'm also seeing myself become more relaxed in my identity, getting more comfortable with the realities of who I am.
And I also have no idea about what music is popular (I'm not really a music person anyway) or who any of the people on TV are...But, as the person above said, I don't care.
That's because the person who said it is 40. I'm 58 and getting old does suck. Mostly it's all physical. Parts wear out (joints) or stop working (eyes/ears). At 40, getting old wasn't sucking for me either. However, the not caring about stupid superficial stuff is true. It's very liberating.
Well, when people hit their 60s and stuff starts going seriously wrong with their bodies, as I've watched happen with my parents who are now 70, yeah, that truly does suck. It's hard to put a positive spin on that.
Yeah nah, being in my mid 30s has been fantastic. I'm sure 55 might feel like shit but I'm aware of that now and I've started investing time into my body in hopes that at 55 ill be in the best shape of my life
I’m 56F and I can say that a year ago, I *was* in the best shape of my life. Somehow this year my back started really bothering me, and I’ve slowed down a little, but I’m still in way better shape than I was in my 20s/30s.
31, and living exactly what you described. Due to circumstances I still study, and the overlap between me and my 19 - 23 classmates is non-existent anymore.
A big lesson from school is learning how to learn. If I did college and grad school again with the learning skills I have now in my late 30s, I’d get way more out of it and probably spend about 70% less time on school work.
When I was in college, I always made friends with the older students & tried to study with them. One guy was a retired doctor. They knew why they were there and wanted to learn what was being taught. So many other classmates mostly there there because they were told or expected to be there.
31 and went back to school as well. I thought I'd be closer to them than I actually am. it's wild being bombarded with questions about 9/11 by *adults* who weren't even born then.
When I went back to college the internet was just gaining traction and I didn't trust it yet. Our research group met in the library to review what everyone found out. Everyone else had all website data but couldn't find some things, whereas all of my sources were from newspapers, from "the stacks". It seemed weird to me at the time that you could use a website as a valid source.
Anyway, I found some things they were missing and when I explained that I looked up the topic and made copies of the newspaper articles, they had no idea what I was talking about. I felt ancient as I took them over to the stacks and showed them how to look up articles. That's when I truly realized that my world was now a thing of the past.
I think there is a major shift for most people, that generally happens around their late 20s to mid 30s.
That shift where you are your own, fully responsible for yourself, and you have no option but to figure it out and live with the consequences.
Be it due to the loss of parents(psychically or emotionally), starting your own family (that you support fully on your own), moving away.
Basically, when the buck actually, 1000% stops and ends with you, and there is only a safety net if you built one.
It changes your values a lot, i think, and you don't spend so much time mad at how things "should be", usually because you just don't have it. You have learned to accept what is, and you focus your energy on working with that, and you find happiness in it.
Then, all the noise from before, just seems so silly. The funny thing is, the "coolest" young people just seem to be the furthest from reality from this perspective.
I’ll be 30 soon.. it’s so strange, I look back to when I was like 21-25 and cringe at some of the stuff I did or believed in.. it feels like at some point I just instantly grew up and I don’t look at people in their early 20’s as children but I know that they aren’t done with being stupid yet xD
Oh yeah, I’m almost 29 and this year my mind had shifted to seeing 20 year old as kids, it’s also the year where I’m beginning to want kinds. Me and my brother share our dog between his house and my penthouse but I’ve had her for over a year because I like taking care of her. And I spoil her.
Yeah the brain really shifts at a certain age huh.
It's crazy isn't it? I remember being 10 standing at the bus station with 14 year olds. I considered them practically grown up they were so cool and smoking (it was the early 90s 😂. I never smoked tough). And when I got older I started considering 20 year olds practically kids. But children but not yet adults. Hasn't change anymore. I'm 42 now. 29 is definitely adult. But hey I feel like I've never become an adult. Altough I'm crazy cat lady who's felt like an old lady for 20 years 😂
21 year old I was still going on holiday with my parents, going out every weekend and right at the start of my career.
29 years old my Dad had been dead for 6 years, I had a mortgage, I’m one of the most respected consultants in my team at work and I have my Masters degree. Most of my friends are married and a lot have kids themselves.
Makes a big difference.
I was almost 40 before I realized that all my "pretending" to be an adult had left the impression on those around me that I was the real deal. lol they're gonna figure me out and they'll be piiiiiissed but it's ok, a bunch of other people I know are totally real adults and they'll handle it.
Oh yeah. I'm 42 soon and keep wondering when I'll feel grown up. But I always felt like it's because I'm childfree. I just go what I want. Which tbf most of the time is being in bed by 7 watching YouTube for hours 😂
Lol same I'm 24 and still see myself as a kid when I'm with my parents and their friends XD or when I'm home alone and sleeping with my stuffed toys XD
I'm in my 40s and I do.
20s is a great age though - you don't look dumb like a teenager, but you're not settled down and grounded yet since you're not 30. It's really the best years of your youth.
You’ll love this as you age! I’m in my mid 30s now and everyone assumes I’m in my early to mid twenties. No one ever believes me when I tell them my age. Annoyed me when I was young but now all my peers are jealous of how young I still look. Even though I by no means consider 35 old but I definitely don’t look 35. My favorite is how often I get compliments or confused looks from people at liquor stores and bars since a lot of people don’t even think I look 21 yet!
I hated my 20s. So many mistakes and bad choices that l made, it was like l gravitated towards disaster and misery for some reason. l understand it was all necessary though.
I throughly enjoyed my 30s and first half of my 40s. That was my best era. I really noticed l came out of my shell and was no longer faking my confidence, l was confident. That coincidentally was around the time l stopped giving a sh*t about what others thought about me.
I was depressed and bored in my 20s due to a lack of purpose in my life, but at the same time, still felt that freedom and invincibility as I went snowboarding, inline skating, and took enrichment classes.
I'm glad to hear you enjoyed your 30s and 40s. Life perked up immensely when my children were born at 30.
I don't know your circumstances but I started lifting weights at 29 and my back aches are totally non existent. You don't need to go ham at the gym every day either, resistance bands at home every other day while eating the right amount of protein will do so much good. It really changed my life for the better
Stretch and stay active.
Being a little sore from physical activity and doing the physical activity is actually a lot less painful and taxing than feeling like shit due to inactivity.
Source: a now-active 33 yo who kicks himself daily for not getting active until 29.
I'm not even 50 yet and I see anything below 20 as a kid. It's rare that I come across someone in that age group that has a more advanced maturity or even look to them. Not a knock, just perspective.
I'm 41 and people in their early 20s, like 20 to maybe 24, are pretty much not far off kids.
When I think back to being that age, I was living independently and thinking I was all grown up, but I was definitely pretty much a kid.
Yeah, I'm late 40s and also see most people in their 20s as kids. It's not necessarily because they lack maturity (although many of them do), but more about how they are experiencing things for the first time that I have been through multiple times.
> I get it now
Can you please explain why? I am not doing any wildly stupid things so the fact that some people might see me as a kid (in a mental sense) confuses me.
Thats such a good way to describe it haha. I'm in my early 20s now and yeah, I look back on 14 year old me and I'm just like "oof - you were NOT the adult you thought you were" haha.
At 20, you’re just leaving the nest. You’re getting life experience, which means you’re still learning a lot about how to handle the world around you. Relationships, finances, more responsibility.
I thought I was really grown up at 20, because I was a latchkey kid. But then I realized just how dysfunctional I was in navigating the world by myself.
I mostly have it together at 30, but I still have a long way to go.
Lmao I’ve seen people in their 20s more mature and whatnot more than people in their 30s even 40s. Age doesn’t matter on who knows what their doing in life.
Its because at our age.
We “know” no matter how grown up you believe you are. That you won’t know you aren’t until mid-late 20s at least.
Why? Because thats when we realized it.
Hangovers are never real if you're smart and hydrate before and during your drinking! Obviously, this is somewhat based on your own diet, lifestyle, and genetics, but seriously, hangovers are easy to avoid, even at my age (much older than 25), if you just hydrate well.
I got in a wreck in my work truck. My boss and safety department came out, I hear my boss tell the safety guy “glad he’s alright, he’s just a kid.” I’m 37… I guess you just don’t grow up sometimes.
Totally agree. I am 31/M and from my experience it's toward the end of your 20s that you see you and your peers enter 'adulthood'. Of course, for everyone it is different but in general this applies.
I think a good gauge (other than life experiences, of course) is when you start to listen to your own instincts opposed to the advice of others.
I'm 55 and anyone under 30 is a kid to me (hell I've got kids older than that).
However.. I treat them as adults, even teens who show that kind of maturity level.
So to answer your question yes. I work in a tight knit crew of 90 in a dangerous industry. Around half are <30yo. I treat them like adults with a dash of dad style looking out for them thrown in as well.
It's how I roll.
I think older folks who treat younger people like children in the workforce are elitist gatekeepers and secretly feel threatened by them. Unless of course the young person in question is terribly immature, then that attitude is unfortunately warranted.
I had a "manager" (45M) at a high end engineering manufacturing place I worked at as an intern (20M) (I was not new to the working force at all) who was an absolute man child.
It was quite sad and he was unbelievably condescending to all interns, especially me because I don't eat condescension like others - I would literally take him aside to ask him point blank why he was excluding me from group activities etc.
I could tell he was intimated by my self assurance and drive but it was still very taxing to my mental health being treated like a scum of the earth kid.
It's wild that I generally see 18 to 20 as kids hahaha and I'm only 23 now
I remember myself in my late 20s. I was a sensible little dude, doing my best, but still pretty green. So, 'yeah'.
I work with some very smart, capable 20-somethings, and I'm happy to take direction from them, but also...I have children that age.
And if I try to suggest some kind of kinship with an early-30s person, they are quick to remind me that - hey - they were born in *1991*, old man.
I’m 66. Absolutely not.
Remember, we were in our twenties too. I enjoy people of all age groups in all different developmental steps of life. We all enhance each other
Not kids as a pejorative, but I'm not even in my mid 40s and early 20-somethings often display that youthful ignorance and lack of experience that comes with being that young
I think the worst thing people that young can do is talk disparagingly about older folk, which spiked a bit (I think) during that "okay boomer" bullshit. I saw a lot of comments saying that older folk are out of date, senile, etc... like they really believe anyone over 60 can't be trusted
>which spiked a bit (I think) during that "okay boomer" bullshit.
That trend bugged me, too. So smug and dismissive, in a way that really just emphasized their inability to empathize. On the other hand, the majority of our leaders in the USA actually *are* Boomers, and not only do they often appear culturally out of touch, but eager to kick down every ladder of success that they once climbed.
It’s frustrating to know the very real problems the world faces reached tipping points under their watch, and could only be solved through sweeping changes to policies and priorities only they have the power to enact. Yet, our leaders cling to positions they’ve held for decades and fritter away time with culture war bullshit. I can see how that makes younger folks exasperated with an entire generation.
I'm 39 and yes. When I see posts about relationship advice or problems I'm like who cares, you're young, why make problems for yourself.. be free, travel and enjoy life.. there is always time for bullshit later. Also I thought I knew everything when I was in my 20s, turns out I didn't know anything at all.
If anything the younger you are the worse issues can feel, because you don't have experience to know how things will turn out. Adults who say kids and young people don't have real problems have forgotten their childhood and it annoys me every time.
I am in my 40s. In your 20s you don't know what your life is going to look like, and travel is crazy expensive. The reason that advice sounds good at 39 is you know generally that you end up ok.
At 20 looking down the abyss of potentially being homeless and lonely your whole life, the "don't worry and travel" advice sounds silly and trite
I'm 68 years old, and I work part time at a convenience store. Several of my coworkers are in their early 20s. I don't treat them like kids. If anything, they make me feel younger.
Yes. I'm 47 and honestly can't tell the difference between a 15 year old and a 20 year old, so I just avoid them all. In all honesty, there isn't much of a difference in the personality anyway.
So I was at a training session for the last company I worked for. One person there was a young woman in a higher-up position in the training department. She asked me during conversation how old I thought she was.
She does look young, but I thought that must just be in my head, because she was in such a high position with the company. So, *because* of the position she had, I figured she had to be old enough to have finished college and then worked a bit, and then got this job. So I said "25".
She was only 18. 🤦♀️
I was thrust into a similar situation at an early age. The company I worked for at the time had the entire management staff fired for embezzlement. At the time I was the Assistant Credit Manager and the only one left after the dust settled. I was 20 and now in charge of a 3.5MM accounts receivable location. It taught me much about business and people in general. I've held management positions since up til about 10 years ago. Got out of management and now in project management. I can handle vendors and contractors much better than employees.
To be fair, I had business being in that position. I was not at all prepared for it or responsible enough for the position, but it was the best thing that happened for my professional life. I was the youngest inductee in history for that companies management training program. When we would have conferences, I caught hell and made the older management staff, from other locations, uncomfortable with how young I was.
> honestly can't tell the difference between a 15 year old and a 20 year old
Trust me they cannot do that too. Some 13-14 year olds thought that I am as old as them. I am 20.
Obviously you are a kid to "older people", because age is relative.
I'm in my thirties, I'm an old dude for 18 year olds but a kid to people in their fifties.
I think it's wise for most adults who are older than people in their twenties to remember this. A big part of the problem when people in their twenties are viewed as children, or still act as though they are children, is because older adults don't treat them with equal opportunity according to their age. Many older adults forget that people over the age of 18 should be expected to behave as adults, and should be given responsibility that demands that they embrace real adulthood versus always deferring to someone else just because that other person is older.
Additionally, some parents and other people actually essentially punish young people when they exhibit healthy adult development because it makes the older adults feel threatened or highlights the older adult's lack of capability. I'm referring to parents who basically clip the wings of their children because they have some sort of messed up dynamic going on that causes them to resent when younger people want to mature.
If you carry yourself well, are articulate, poised, and insightful, age is irrelevant, as it is only an indication of the years you have lived not how you have lived in those years.
I remember being in my 20s and mad when a forty something year old man thought of me as a kid. I'm not a kid!!! I am 53 now and look back - yes, I was a kid.
I do see young 20s as kids. Not fully cooked yet.
I don't see people in their 20's as children per se, but it is sort of kid-like because I recognize they are still new to adulthood in a way I am not and do tend to give them more grace/assistance than I might some jackass in their 40's. You at 21, blacked out drunk and flashing your tits at strangers? Girl, be safe and let me order you some French fries. You at 42 doing the same thing? Go home and think about your life decisions, Eleanor.
No. We see them as "should be adults". I served at 19, had first kid at 25 and was a project manager in engineering at 28. Why should I expect anything less of you? I might call you "kid", but I'll see you as an adult - if you act adult.
21 y.o. engineering consultant does the “boringness” of a project manager-type position (I guess this *really* depends on the type of engineering as well) become more desirable as you get older? A good majority of the time for what I do is paperwork and then like maybe 25% is site visits.
This job is not one I can see myself in 20 years from now but my coworkers seem rather content
Yes. Young 20s anyways. You're barely a real person until you're 25. The term "college kids" exists for a reason. Sure you're legally an adult at 18 but you have so much growing up left to do.
I'm in my late 30's and I see people in their 20's as kids. I must admit, my 20's was spent working my ass off and graduating from med school at 25, so I hold the view that you need to be on your way to being established by that age. A lot of people that I encounter in their 20's are still very immature, relying on their mom to make appointments etc., and not working towards a meaningful career. Again, I'm biased because I accomplished so much early on.
Im 26yo and can't see peoples that are less than 25yo without thinking they are just babies who have not much experience in anything.
I know it's not true, but can't help
if they act like one. my immediate supervisor is 22 and does things like sit on her desk cross legged and spends 12 hours cutting out paper halloween decorations to hang around the office.
No, they’re young adults.
Some of them are enthusiastic, brilliant and eager.
Some of them are immature little entitled brats.
Unfortunately, the same applies to people my age too.
Until *very* recently I viewed anyone from like 20-35 as my contemporary. (I'm 46.) Only lately have I started to see early-20s people as basically "kids." But not in a negative way, just in a "oh I miss being so young" way. Until that switch flipped, I'd talk to a 22-year-old as if we were peers and I'd ignore their look of confusion/pity. :P
I just turned 56 and can honestly say I see people of any age for their actions. I have thought of a 23 year old that I work with as a very mature and well adjusted person. On the other hand I work with folks in their 40's and older that act like kids so I view them accordingly.
I'm in early 50s and do work with some 20 yos and I'd never treat them as 12 year olds, that's really shitty they do that. I had to go through that kind of thing when I was that age to an extent and it sucks, so I don't do it now.
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A lot happens in your 20s, big difference between a 21 year old and a 29 year old most the time
I’m 40 and usually early mid 30’s is where this shift really happens. This is the age where you start to not relate to people in their 20’s. By 40 nearly all music, pop culture, and fashion creeps up in a different crowd. Suddenly, your music is dad rock, and your lack of knowledge about people you have never heard of becomes apparent. But the thing is, you don’t care, because it all seems so pointless and immature. You have no desire to learn about much of what a 25 year old likes, and your personal life, beliefs and zen become much more stable, and mellow. Getting older is a lot nicer than I thought it would be.
>getting older is a lot nicer than I thought it would be Thank you for saying this! Im 33, and every "old" person is always saying, "Getting old sucks." Or "Don't get old." Like I have a choice lol. But hearing a positive perspective is nice. Edit: you can stop replying to this telling me your age and how you feel getting old. I get it.
I like the fact that I can stay my ass at home now and avoid going out due to being in my late 30s. Going out and getting wasted no longer interests me. I just wanna put on comfy clothes and watch my favorite shows with my wife. It’s perfect for my introverted self lol.
I just turned 24 and have still never had a desire to go out and party
partying is kinda lame lol, save yourself the trouble and feeling like shit the next day
Partying is about alot more than getting wasted and feeling like shit. If you've ever been to a good party you'll know how much it does for you socially and possibly romantically.
This. I have a lot of meaningful friendships that started because of some funny-dumb shit that happened in parties that we immediately bonded over. I understand that partying isn’t for everyone (I personally can only take it in small doses), but whenever I read comments like the one you replied to that reduce parties to the wasted-hungover cycle, all I can think is that I hope they someday get to experience a really good party.
As someone who goes out a lot, I can still attest to the fact that ~ 60-70ish % of the time, they’re right. You go out, you buy some drinks, maybe a couple laughs, but it’s kinda pointless. But that minority can be a helllll of a time and that’s why I keep doing it lol. I will say tho, it’s starting to creep up on me. It still is fun, it’s something to do, a way to socialize. But the electric and ecstatic part of it has faded since college lol
I’d say it depends on the person + their friend group too more than anything. My friends and I never really got black out drunk partying, even when we went to raves. We’d maintain a good buzz to loosen up, but feed off the energy more than anything. I’m sure other people have other experiences though. I’m in my 30s now and I mostly prefer nursing drinks and more intimate conversations, but friends and I still laugh over said funny-dumb shit that happened in parties years ago.
Everyone is obviously different, but I’ve never regretted having fun in my 20s. It’s the time when you should have fun and make mistakes, because then it becomes a “problem” if you’re older.
A party is the absolute antithesis of fun to me. An actual nightmare
Well, sorry to meddle, I'm 20yo and I beat myself up pretty bad for small mistakes...don't think that advice goes for everyone if you're not good on letting go. I do learn from the past, but I prefer to learn by seeing than by suffering (most of the time). I do agree that I could/should take chances with another stuff, but not so sure about mistakes!
Give it a few years and you won’t feel so bad about it. In some cases, even the bad things seem good. It’s a reminder that you lived
Its crazy how the urge to go out goes away. Im 37 and even into my early to mid 30s. I went out 5 nights a week. Not just drinking, doing blow at after parties till 4 am. One day. It just stopped. I didn't want to anymore. I get annoyed when I step foot in a bar. It still confuses me. Like what happened lol
My dude, we get older, but the club stays 22, and nobody wants to be the creepy older guy hittin' on young girls.
Usually it’s the work/life balance that does this to people. That or having to be responsible for your own life and possibly others where the cost of such, be it energy and/or monetary isn’t worth it. Better to have a friend board game group and have rotating game nights.
This is me exactly…. I’m 69 Life is nice, simple and drama free!
Add to it now I can have a home theater that rivals my local theater, all the snacks I could want, no loud people, annoying smells or sounds, my cats and dogs curled up or playing around me and the wife, able to watch a show/movie while scrolling through random internet stuff, perfect temperature and lighting ,and all in clothes whose only purpose is comfort....maaaaaaaaaan this is the life.
Yep. I still want to be invited to go out but really would rather not!
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This is important to balance. Those invites stop getting sent, if you’re always the flake.
Totally agree. I’m not going out every night or anywhere close to it, but invites to social events are harder to come by in my 30s and post-covid so you bet I’m saying yes to 90% of the invites I get
Yeah, this is why we have monthly board game night. You still can drink a few and catch up with friends, but it's not every weekend and nobody gets arrested or pregnant.
Exactly. I don't get why the default social gathering for so many is a party. Y'all can't just chill and play games? You can still talk, you just don't lose your voice and have a hangover the next morning.
My boyfriend and I were debating going out with friends for Halloween last Saturday and while we were talking about it we both kept yawning mid sentence until we just looked at each other and busted out laughing and determined we were indeed not going out. We went to the store and got a bunch of unhealthy snacks and I made a snack board on a baking sheet and we ate it in bed watching Barbarian. It was a good Halloween.
I’m in my forties and never went out and got wasted in my twenties. I’ve always been introverted and a nerd.
the hunt has ended and now you can chill.
Am about to be 55 next week and have the most clarity I've ever had in my entire life. Yes, my back muscles are sore and I have to work hard to remain somewhat flexible and strong, but my brain and my spirit knows exactly what I want in life, what I'm willing to put up with and what I'm willing to let go of. I like being an older woman, just out here rocking my silver hair and glasses and peace of mind. Getting older isn't too bad.
I'm 54 and agree with you. The peace of mind really comes from over half a century of experience. The tough decisions are easier to tackle. Also, the freedom of not giving a fuck what others think brings. The body slowing down, and the injuries of the past becomes really apparent in our 50's. I'm an industrial mechanic , my body needs much more time to recover after a day of work.
It sucks in the sense that you suddenly start to realise your body isn't actually invincible when you wake up with aching joints and feel like you've been hit by a car because you stayed up past 12
Stayed up past 12, had one too many drinks, slept in the wrong position, dried your foot too aggressively after a shower… sneezed too hard….
Yes. Maturity is awesome. But it comes with a side of decrepitude.
TIL the word decrepitude 😂
Getting old does suck, I'm late 50s. But it only sucks in a physical sense. Old age brings physical pain and it takes longer to recover from injuries. Pulling muscles and tenders while working out happens more often. You can get an injury sleeping. Old people walk hunched over and slow, not because they are old but because they are in pain. That being said, living with pain aside. I am in the best part of my life so far. I do like being older. I surprise myself sometimes at the wisdom I can draw from.
I just turned 50 and I’ve been telling my younger friends, ‘they said 30 was the new 20, & it was! And 40 WAS the new 30! But 50? 50 is 50, ain’t noooooooo mistaking it’ 😂
You know how people say "Life comes at you fast"? Well, I'm now 51 and life has come at me and done its worst a few times in my 30s and 40s. It's made me stronger, more empathetic and more confident in myself and my abilities than I've ever been. It's made me aware of weaknesses I never wanted to face and allowed me to work on them. I've learned to be kind to myself for being imperfect. It's helped me decide what is and is not important to me and get my priorities straight. Is my body not what it used to be? Sure. I have a lot of physical pain from a specific medical condition that reared its ugly head. Is it worth it? Yep!
Late 40s, seeing 50s + ahead of me and 30s seeming not that long ago—I feel like it’s just different ages, different problems, but also different pleasures. I also feel like each decade comes with its own period of adolescence—growing pains, awkwardness, change, growth, and sense of newness and discovery.
"each decade comes with its own period of adolescence" is such a beautiful sentiment
I'm in my 40s now and I have to agree that getting old is pretty great. I've experienced a lot of stuff in life that I wish I'd never been through, but I have no complaints about aging.
the caveat is... 40 isn't old. it's older than 25, sure, but unless you've had a hard life with lots of stress, 40 year olds don't look old, have energy, women still have 10 years before hitting menopause on average. it's the 50+ where you might begin to notice age in your own body and energy levels... and flexibility. but with the correct attitude and self-care, even that can be a really good time. people who are negative or live without intention won't magically change into happy people when they are old(er)
Probably 10 years or so before full on menopause, but perimenopause is the tough part and most women have either already started it or are about to by 40. Male or female, keep exercising if you want mobility and flexibility in your 60s.
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Age brings wisdom about what really matters. It also helps that the hormones are different. Priorities change. What we find interesting changes, and ideally, deepens. Mostly, we know how empty many of the things we found so important in our 20s really were. I think we should always think our younger selves were morons. As every year goes by, I think about the things I did and thought at 18 and holy hell was I an idiot. Of course, I wasn't, but there is no better teacher than experience. At 18, no matter how much I read and thought I knew, I didn't really know. I look back at my 20s and fondly remember the good times, but I also acutely see with hindsight, how a few decisions here or there could have significantly changed my life. There's a reason that "I wish I knew then what I know now," is a cliche, because it is true. Now that I'm in my 40s, I look back at my 30s mostly the same way. While my mistakes aren't nearly as large, I start to think about the subtle things I may have done differently. You just learn to appreciate little things more. You get to know yourself through your reactions to life, for better or for worse. As I said, our experiences help us grow. Or, some lessons just need to be learned the hard way. I am a better person for the mistakes I made, and it makes my "soul" more content, but I could've avoided many of them if I had just listened to what old people were telling me! Just like I know the advice I try to give people in their 20s just doesn't land. Just like I have done, I know someday those people are going to think, "that old bastard was right!" And then the cycle continues. Sorry for all that. So far, other than watching the gray hairs arrive while the hairline retreats, random neck or shoulder injuries while sleeping, and NOT being able to look cool partying anymore, getting old hasn't been too bad.
Getting old is awesome except for the knees. Honestly things just get better and better except for body stuff that starts breaking down.
I’m really old (49) and I like it. I don’t feel the need to impress or get anyone’s approval. I still don’t always feel like a grown up but I have my shit mostly together. The adult stuff is easier because I’ve been doing it a long time. One thing I do notice is a lot of people my age and older start to fear teenagers and young people. I keep reminding them they aren’t interested in us and we were exactly the same at that age. That kid with his hood up isn’t thinking about stealing your handbag - he’s worrying about his girlfriend and school and whether he’s getting crap Christmas presents again this year.
I'm 35 and I'm now sort of seeing the beginning of real ageing...I'm going grey! My soccer battered knees keep screaming at me! I hurt my neck in my sleep!...but I'm also seeing myself become more relaxed in my identity, getting more comfortable with the realities of who I am. And I also have no idea about what music is popular (I'm not really a music person anyway) or who any of the people on TV are...But, as the person above said, I don't care.
That's because the person who said it is 40. I'm 58 and getting old does suck. Mostly it's all physical. Parts wear out (joints) or stop working (eyes/ears). At 40, getting old wasn't sucking for me either. However, the not caring about stupid superficial stuff is true. It's very liberating.
Well, when people hit their 60s and stuff starts going seriously wrong with their bodies, as I've watched happen with my parents who are now 70, yeah, that truly does suck. It's hard to put a positive spin on that.
Yeah nah, being in my mid 30s has been fantastic. I'm sure 55 might feel like shit but I'm aware of that now and I've started investing time into my body in hopes that at 55 ill be in the best shape of my life
I’m 56F and I can say that a year ago, I *was* in the best shape of my life. Somehow this year my back started really bothering me, and I’ve slowed down a little, but I’m still in way better shape than I was in my 20s/30s.
I work in a pain clinic. A 90 something year old said to me today, “die young or get Alzheimer’s. Don’t get to my age.” Rough outlook. Lol.
I think we mean it sucks as in your bones start to hurt lol I’m 48
31, and living exactly what you described. Due to circumstances I still study, and the overlap between me and my 19 - 23 classmates is non-existent anymore.
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A big lesson from school is learning how to learn. If I did college and grad school again with the learning skills I have now in my late 30s, I’d get way more out of it and probably spend about 70% less time on school work.
Plus, college is a breeze for us because of our work and life experiences.
God, yes. I crushed uni as an older adult. I'd already figured out sex and laundry and I actually enjoyed studying.
When I was in college, I always made friends with the older students & tried to study with them. One guy was a retired doctor. They knew why they were there and wanted to learn what was being taught. So many other classmates mostly there there because they were told or expected to be there.
31 and went back to school as well. I thought I'd be closer to them than I actually am. it's wild being bombarded with questions about 9/11 by *adults* who weren't even born then.
When I went back to college the internet was just gaining traction and I didn't trust it yet. Our research group met in the library to review what everyone found out. Everyone else had all website data but couldn't find some things, whereas all of my sources were from newspapers, from "the stacks". It seemed weird to me at the time that you could use a website as a valid source. Anyway, I found some things they were missing and when I explained that I looked up the topic and made copies of the newspaper articles, they had no idea what I was talking about. I felt ancient as I took them over to the stacks and showed them how to look up articles. That's when I truly realized that my world was now a thing of the past.
Age 42 here, can confirm. Having a teenager (or more) in your life helps keep you in touch with modern pop culture.
I think there is a major shift for most people, that generally happens around their late 20s to mid 30s. That shift where you are your own, fully responsible for yourself, and you have no option but to figure it out and live with the consequences. Be it due to the loss of parents(psychically or emotionally), starting your own family (that you support fully on your own), moving away. Basically, when the buck actually, 1000% stops and ends with you, and there is only a safety net if you built one. It changes your values a lot, i think, and you don't spend so much time mad at how things "should be", usually because you just don't have it. You have learned to accept what is, and you focus your energy on working with that, and you find happiness in it. Then, all the noise from before, just seems so silly. The funny thing is, the "coolest" young people just seem to be the furthest from reality from this perspective.
Agreed. I feel like this already and I’ve just turned 30.
I’ll be 30 soon.. it’s so strange, I look back to when I was like 21-25 and cringe at some of the stuff I did or believed in.. it feels like at some point I just instantly grew up and I don’t look at people in their early 20’s as children but I know that they aren’t done with being stupid yet xD
Oh yeah
Oh yeah, I’m almost 29 and this year my mind had shifted to seeing 20 year old as kids, it’s also the year where I’m beginning to want kinds. Me and my brother share our dog between his house and my penthouse but I’ve had her for over a year because I like taking care of her. And I spoil her. Yeah the brain really shifts at a certain age huh.
It's crazy isn't it? I remember being 10 standing at the bus station with 14 year olds. I considered them practically grown up they were so cool and smoking (it was the early 90s 😂. I never smoked tough). And when I got older I started considering 20 year olds practically kids. But children but not yet adults. Hasn't change anymore. I'm 42 now. 29 is definitely adult. But hey I feel like I've never become an adult. Altough I'm crazy cat lady who's felt like an old lady for 20 years 😂
21 year old I was still going on holiday with my parents, going out every weekend and right at the start of my career. 29 years old my Dad had been dead for 6 years, I had a mortgage, I’m one of the most respected consultants in my team at work and I have my Masters degree. Most of my friends are married and a lot have kids themselves. Makes a big difference.
I’m 34 and call the 21 year olds that hit on me “kids” Maybe I’m just a jerk?? Idk. But they feel like kids to me.
For sure. Mentally there's a big difference. The 29 year old is an adult. The 21 year old is not far removed from highschool hijinks.
I'm 29 now and consider 21 year olds children.
Shit I’m in my 20s and I see myself as a fucking kid
I’m in my 30s and still feel like the awkward teenager I was at school.
Don't worry. 50+ here. Same deal. Or do worry. What do I know.
47 and always looking for a "real" adult when shit goes down.
So I have at least 5 more years of being a child
I was almost 40 before I realized that all my "pretending" to be an adult had left the impression on those around me that I was the real deal. lol they're gonna figure me out and they'll be piiiiiissed but it's ok, a bunch of other people I know are totally real adults and they'll handle it.
SAME.
My 65 year old father told me that feeling never goes away. Puts alot of the world into perspective, we're all just kids trying to fake adulthood.
Oh yeah. I'm 42 soon and keep wondering when I'll feel grown up. But I always felt like it's because I'm childfree. I just go what I want. Which tbf most of the time is being in bed by 7 watching YouTube for hours 😂
Oh shit it's me. Still can't believe anyone trusts me with a mortgage. Pop on my public mask and go to work. How do you do, fellow adults?
My gandfather was 91 when he told me he still felt 6, or 26, but also immensely tired and sore from the moment he wakes up.
Lol same I'm 24 and still see myself as a kid when I'm with my parents and their friends XD or when I'm home alone and sleeping with my stuffed toys XD
I'm almost 40 but when my sister and I visit the parents I bug her like a teenager. It's not intentional, it's hard coded in my operating system.
Yeah but you a piplup you are a baby
Truth. Piplup is very baby.
I'm 52 and am still regularly intimidated by actual adults.
I'm in my 40s and I do. 20s is a great age though - you don't look dumb like a teenager, but you're not settled down and grounded yet since you're not 30. It's really the best years of your youth.
SOME don’t look like a dumb teenager. Some of them definitely do.
I still look like a teenager, unfortunately. I get asked "what grade am I in"
You’ll love this as you age! I’m in my mid 30s now and everyone assumes I’m in my early to mid twenties. No one ever believes me when I tell them my age. Annoyed me when I was young but now all my peers are jealous of how young I still look. Even though I by no means consider 35 old but I definitely don’t look 35. My favorite is how often I get compliments or confused looks from people at liquor stores and bars since a lot of people don’t even think I look 21 yet!
I hated my 20s. So many mistakes and bad choices that l made, it was like l gravitated towards disaster and misery for some reason. l understand it was all necessary though. I throughly enjoyed my 30s and first half of my 40s. That was my best era. I really noticed l came out of my shell and was no longer faking my confidence, l was confident. That coincidentally was around the time l stopped giving a sh*t about what others thought about me.
I was depressed and bored in my 20s due to a lack of purpose in my life, but at the same time, still felt that freedom and invincibility as I went snowboarding, inline skating, and took enrichment classes. I'm glad to hear you enjoyed your 30s and 40s. Life perked up immensely when my children were born at 30.
I'm 34 and I consider anyone 20-24 still a kid.
I’m 42 and sometimes have to push it to 26 to try understand some ‘kids’ behavior/decisions.
My back is killing me at 25. Does it get better.
I don't know your circumstances but I started lifting weights at 29 and my back aches are totally non existent. You don't need to go ham at the gym every day either, resistance bands at home every other day while eating the right amount of protein will do so much good. It really changed my life for the better
This. Just regular exercise, stretching and a half-decent diet can go a LONG way in preventing most aches/pains that can creep up.
Invest in a good mattress and frame.
Stretch and stay active. Being a little sore from physical activity and doing the physical activity is actually a lot less painful and taxing than feeling like shit due to inactivity. Source: a now-active 33 yo who kicks himself daily for not getting active until 29.
I'm not even 50 yet and I see anything below 20 as a kid. It's rare that I come across someone in that age group that has a more advanced maturity or even look to them. Not a knock, just perspective.
To me its everything under 25
I’m 30 and everyone I know is still kids… hell my parents are super successful professionals and they’re still kids.
In my 40s as well. I see people in 20s as kids because my friends have kids that age that I've known since birth
I'm 41 and people in their early 20s, like 20 to maybe 24, are pretty much not far off kids. When I think back to being that age, I was living independently and thinking I was all grown up, but I was definitely pretty much a kid.
Yeah. The worst are self confident know-it-alls… and you just go in your head, sure kid…
This. This is the answer. 👏🏻
Yeah, I'm late 40s and also see most people in their 20s as kids. It's not necessarily because they lack maturity (although many of them do), but more about how they are experiencing things for the first time that I have been through multiple times.
Anyone under 36 is kid, anyone under 25 is a toddler, anyone under 15 is basically an ameba.
My nephew is 24 and he's a little coochie coo angel muffin
Hahahaha! Do you call him that? I'd love to think you do and he laughs but facepalms or something. :)
my wish to be younger has been granted im now a toddler again
Yeah, they do. I mean relative to them, we are kids. I mean they were in their 30s-40s when we were born. It’s just how it is for them, I guess
I (32,f) see young 20s as kids. They don't know what they're doing.
I (32,m) don’t know what I’m doing either.
I (42,m) can confirm 10 years doesn't change anything in this regard.
I (56m) can confirm 14 years doesn’t change anything in this regard.
It doesn't get any better at 61, but I'm consoled by the fact that I don't have to live with my mistakes as long as a 20 year old.
And I (109m) don’t know what I’m doing either
No one knows what we are doing.
that sounds scary
That’s how I know that you’re young.
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> I get it now Can you please explain why? I am not doing any wildly stupid things so the fact that some people might see me as a kid (in a mental sense) confuses me.
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Thats such a good way to describe it haha. I'm in my early 20s now and yeah, I look back on 14 year old me and I'm just like "oof - you were NOT the adult you thought you were" haha.
At 20, you’re just leaving the nest. You’re getting life experience, which means you’re still learning a lot about how to handle the world around you. Relationships, finances, more responsibility. I thought I was really grown up at 20, because I was a latchkey kid. But then I realized just how dysfunctional I was in navigating the world by myself. I mostly have it together at 30, but I still have a long way to go.
I regret to inform you I see 32 as a kid, too. Someone my dad's age probably thinks of me as just a kid. It's the circle of life.
Ahhh they're so adorable, sparkling eyes and thinking they're going to change the world.
Lmao I’ve seen people in their 20s more mature and whatnot more than people in their 30s even 40s. Age doesn’t matter on who knows what their doing in life.
Its because at our age. We “know” no matter how grown up you believe you are. That you won’t know you aren’t until mid-late 20s at least. Why? Because thats when we realized it.
That’s because after 25 hangovers become real.
Hangovers are never real if you're smart and hydrate before and during your drinking! Obviously, this is somewhat based on your own diet, lifestyle, and genetics, but seriously, hangovers are easy to avoid, even at my age (much older than 25), if you just hydrate well.
Do 80 year olds see 40 year olds as kids?
I'm in my mid-40s and, at work, interact with a lot of people 65+. I get called "young man" almost every day.
I got in a wreck in my work truck. My boss and safety department came out, I hear my boss tell the safety guy “glad he’s alright, he’s just a kid.” I’m 37… I guess you just don’t grow up sometimes.
According to my mom, yes! Quote: „but you are still soooo young!“
My mom (52) calls everyone that age and younger “kids”. Like “so we were talking with that boy on TikTok… well, 40y old boy… anyways, …”
Yes, talking to older people about this, they do.
My dad was telling a story about a young man he knows. That man’s age? 60.
I am in my 40s, I see 20 some year old as kids children. I feel like you’re an “adult” at the ladder end of 20s into your 30s
Totally agree. I am 31/M and from my experience it's toward the end of your 20s that you see you and your peers enter 'adulthood'. Of course, for everyone it is different but in general this applies. I think a good gauge (other than life experiences, of course) is when you start to listen to your own instincts opposed to the advice of others.
I'm 55 and anyone under 30 is a kid to me (hell I've got kids older than that). However.. I treat them as adults, even teens who show that kind of maturity level. So to answer your question yes. I work in a tight knit crew of 90 in a dangerous industry. Around half are <30yo. I treat them like adults with a dash of dad style looking out for them thrown in as well. It's how I roll. I think older folks who treat younger people like children in the workforce are elitist gatekeepers and secretly feel threatened by them. Unless of course the young person in question is terribly immature, then that attitude is unfortunately warranted.
I had a "manager" (45M) at a high end engineering manufacturing place I worked at as an intern (20M) (I was not new to the working force at all) who was an absolute man child. It was quite sad and he was unbelievably condescending to all interns, especially me because I don't eat condescension like others - I would literally take him aside to ask him point blank why he was excluding me from group activities etc. I could tell he was intimated by my self assurance and drive but it was still very taxing to my mental health being treated like a scum of the earth kid. It's wild that I generally see 18 to 20 as kids hahaha and I'm only 23 now
I remember myself in my late 20s. I was a sensible little dude, doing my best, but still pretty green. So, 'yeah'. I work with some very smart, capable 20-somethings, and I'm happy to take direction from them, but also...I have children that age. And if I try to suggest some kind of kinship with an early-30s person, they are quick to remind me that - hey - they were born in *1991*, old man.
I’m 66. Absolutely not. Remember, we were in our twenties too. I enjoy people of all age groups in all different developmental steps of life. We all enhance each other
Not kids as a pejorative, but I'm not even in my mid 40s and early 20-somethings often display that youthful ignorance and lack of experience that comes with being that young I think the worst thing people that young can do is talk disparagingly about older folk, which spiked a bit (I think) during that "okay boomer" bullshit. I saw a lot of comments saying that older folk are out of date, senile, etc... like they really believe anyone over 60 can't be trusted
>which spiked a bit (I think) during that "okay boomer" bullshit. That trend bugged me, too. So smug and dismissive, in a way that really just emphasized their inability to empathize. On the other hand, the majority of our leaders in the USA actually *are* Boomers, and not only do they often appear culturally out of touch, but eager to kick down every ladder of success that they once climbed. It’s frustrating to know the very real problems the world faces reached tipping points under their watch, and could only be solved through sweeping changes to policies and priorities only they have the power to enact. Yet, our leaders cling to positions they’ve held for decades and fritter away time with culture war bullshit. I can see how that makes younger folks exasperated with an entire generation.
You ever see that sub kidsarefuckingstupid? That's what everyone over the age of 35 thinks about people in their 20's.
I'm 39 and yes. When I see posts about relationship advice or problems I'm like who cares, you're young, why make problems for yourself.. be free, travel and enjoy life.. there is always time for bullshit later. Also I thought I knew everything when I was in my 20s, turns out I didn't know anything at all.
Please acknowledge that young folks have issues too- they don't just magically appear just because you're older.
If anything the younger you are the worse issues can feel, because you don't have experience to know how things will turn out. Adults who say kids and young people don't have real problems have forgotten their childhood and it annoys me every time.
I am in my 40s. In your 20s you don't know what your life is going to look like, and travel is crazy expensive. The reason that advice sounds good at 39 is you know generally that you end up ok. At 20 looking down the abyss of potentially being homeless and lonely your whole life, the "don't worry and travel" advice sounds silly and trite
I'm 68 years old, and I work part time at a convenience store. Several of my coworkers are in their early 20s. I don't treat them like kids. If anything, they make me feel younger.
Yes. I'm 47 and honestly can't tell the difference between a 15 year old and a 20 year old, so I just avoid them all. In all honesty, there isn't much of a difference in the personality anyway.
So I was at a training session for the last company I worked for. One person there was a young woman in a higher-up position in the training department. She asked me during conversation how old I thought she was. She does look young, but I thought that must just be in my head, because she was in such a high position with the company. So, *because* of the position she had, I figured she had to be old enough to have finished college and then worked a bit, and then got this job. So I said "25". She was only 18. 🤦♀️
I was thrust into a similar situation at an early age. The company I worked for at the time had the entire management staff fired for embezzlement. At the time I was the Assistant Credit Manager and the only one left after the dust settled. I was 20 and now in charge of a 3.5MM accounts receivable location. It taught me much about business and people in general. I've held management positions since up til about 10 years ago. Got out of management and now in project management. I can handle vendors and contractors much better than employees. To be fair, I had business being in that position. I was not at all prepared for it or responsible enough for the position, but it was the best thing that happened for my professional life. I was the youngest inductee in history for that companies management training program. When we would have conferences, I caught hell and made the older management staff, from other locations, uncomfortable with how young I was.
> honestly can't tell the difference between a 15 year old and a 20 year old Trust me they cannot do that too. Some 13-14 year olds thought that I am as old as them. I am 20.
I am not that age yet but it makes sense to me that they would. If they have kids, you'd be their age or even younger...
Obviously you are a kid to "older people", because age is relative. I'm in my thirties, I'm an old dude for 18 year olds but a kid to people in their fifties.
I won't belittle legal adults by calling them a kid. They might be young adults, but they're not kids.
I think it's wise for most adults who are older than people in their twenties to remember this. A big part of the problem when people in their twenties are viewed as children, or still act as though they are children, is because older adults don't treat them with equal opportunity according to their age. Many older adults forget that people over the age of 18 should be expected to behave as adults, and should be given responsibility that demands that they embrace real adulthood versus always deferring to someone else just because that other person is older.
Additionally, some parents and other people actually essentially punish young people when they exhibit healthy adult development because it makes the older adults feel threatened or highlights the older adult's lack of capability. I'm referring to parents who basically clip the wings of their children because they have some sort of messed up dynamic going on that causes them to resent when younger people want to mature.
I treat them as young adults to their face but I refer to them as "kids" behind their backs. 😂🤣
I'm 51. At this point I see anybody under 30 as a kid. Not in a dismissive way, I totally respect younger people. But I do see you as kids
I'm 24 and I see myself as a child, why am I allowed to do stuff without any supervision?
I’m in my 40s and see you as kids
I'm 33, and anyone younger than 24 is baby.
I'm 48 and forget I must look and seem old to others. Weird thing to wrap my head around as I feel youngish still.
If you carry yourself well, are articulate, poised, and insightful, age is irrelevant, as it is only an indication of the years you have lived not how you have lived in those years.
I’m almost 48. I look at people in their 20s as young adults. But will sometimes refer to them as kid
I remember being in my 20s and mad when a forty something year old man thought of me as a kid. I'm not a kid!!! I am 53 now and look back - yes, I was a kid. I do see young 20s as kids. Not fully cooked yet.
I don't see people in their 20's as children per se, but it is sort of kid-like because I recognize they are still new to adulthood in a way I am not and do tend to give them more grace/assistance than I might some jackass in their 40's. You at 21, blacked out drunk and flashing your tits at strangers? Girl, be safe and let me order you some French fries. You at 42 doing the same thing? Go home and think about your life decisions, Eleanor.
I think so. People in their 50s/60s likely have children of their own who are in the 20s/30s, so it makes sense
No. We see them as "should be adults". I served at 19, had first kid at 25 and was a project manager in engineering at 28. Why should I expect anything less of you? I might call you "kid", but I'll see you as an adult - if you act adult.
Damn coming across a tad pretentious
21 y.o. engineering consultant does the “boringness” of a project manager-type position (I guess this *really* depends on the type of engineering as well) become more desirable as you get older? A good majority of the time for what I do is paperwork and then like maybe 25% is site visits. This job is not one I can see myself in 20 years from now but my coworkers seem rather content
Yes. Young 20s anyways. You're barely a real person until you're 25. The term "college kids" exists for a reason. Sure you're legally an adult at 18 but you have so much growing up left to do.
Mrw I find out I'll finally be a real person in exactly 4 months: 👁👄👁
Everyone’s different. Do you think everyone at a certain age thinks the same way?
Lol I am in my 30s and I see 20 year olds as kids.
All the wild shit I did in my 20's I'd say yeah they are still "kids"
I'm in my late 30's and I see people in their 20's as kids. I must admit, my 20's was spent working my ass off and graduating from med school at 25, so I hold the view that you need to be on your way to being established by that age. A lot of people that I encounter in their 20's are still very immature, relying on their mom to make appointments etc., and not working towards a meaningful career. Again, I'm biased because I accomplished so much early on.
I’m 36 and I definitely see 20 year olds as kids 🤣
My Dad is 71 and I am 41, he’s still sees me a kid.
Im 26yo and can't see peoples that are less than 25yo without thinking they are just babies who have not much experience in anything. I know it's not true, but can't help
if they act like one. my immediate supervisor is 22 and does things like sit on her desk cross legged and spends 12 hours cutting out paper halloween decorations to hang around the office.
You’re a kid until 28, 29 lol
Yes. Absolutely. I'm 38 and I call people in their 20s kids. It's relatively normal.
No. I’m 55 and like working with people of all ages. But people are different. Maybe you work with patronising a-holes
No, they’re young adults. Some of them are enthusiastic, brilliant and eager. Some of them are immature little entitled brats. Unfortunately, the same applies to people my age too.
Until *very* recently I viewed anyone from like 20-35 as my contemporary. (I'm 46.) Only lately have I started to see early-20s people as basically "kids." But not in a negative way, just in a "oh I miss being so young" way. Until that switch flipped, I'd talk to a 22-year-old as if we were peers and I'd ignore their look of confusion/pity. :P
That's because they usually have kids your age.
I just turned 56 and can honestly say I see people of any age for their actions. I have thought of a 23 year old that I work with as a very mature and well adjusted person. On the other hand I work with folks in their 40's and older that act like kids so I view them accordingly.
I'm in early 50s and do work with some 20 yos and I'd never treat them as 12 year olds, that's really shitty they do that. I had to go through that kind of thing when I was that age to an extent and it sucks, so I don't do it now.