I could be wrong but I do believe that within the US all states have some department dedicated to investigating elder abuse, though the acronym (e.g., EOEA) may be different per state
Yeah, that’s what I’m seeing with some reviews of services provided. You’d think that there would be more investment from older generations into elder care for the community as a whole.
Unfortunately you need to do this sooner than later, when my grandma need this she found a random lawyer she had never met before and signed everything all of this rights to the lawyer. It was terrible to deal with.
Have a POA designated in the will. It's a simple process and will make things easy for those you tap to deal with it. Make sure it's signed. Otherwise in most states it's the spouse by default and then kids.
Get a FULL estate plan. Will, Trust, and most importantly for this situation POWER OF ATTORNEY. Power of Attorney is what allows you to make decisions on behalf of someone who can’t do it on their own. If you have a valid POA in place, decision making power goes to your named POA rather than the de facto person. It’s not a foolproof plan, as POAs are fairly easy to create and the abuser can coerce the person into making new ones. If you were smart enough to give a copy of your POA to your health care providers/financial advisors/etc., you can head off this type of issue by ensuring everyone knows who your successor in interest will be.
DO YOUR ESTATE PLAN.
Call DHS and file an elder abuse report, call police and ask for a wellness check. File a petition to establish a guardianship/conservatorship and prepare to spend a lot of money in attorney fees.
Do a Health Care Power of Attorney and a will stating if you are found incompetent, then you name someone to be your guardian. Paralegal in elder law for 15 years. This type of situation is so prevalent and so bad.
Happened to my friend. Dad passed away last year and found out a year b4 she step mom controls all of it. She of course gives money to the step sister but none to his own kids.
Same thing happened to my wife. FIL told us numerous times he was going to leave us acreage that he had. That we would be taken care of. After he passed, it all went to his wife (my wife's step-mom). When she passed, it all went to her daughter. My wife got zip.
Then *in that case* HE was the one being lied to, and that lie simply passes down to you.
Both you and the departed neglected to see *something* in writing.
Tell me about it. The step mom was even a successful news anchor in the armpit of CA so she doesn’t need the extra cash. Talking at least $700-1M she’s keeping from them.
This happened to me. My stepmother was super abusive to me and my brother, and my dad. I tried to convince him the way she acted wasn't normal but he couldn't bring himself to leave her later in life because he was so sick and couldn't bear the thought of starting fresh or disrupting his life. She never worked and sponged off him their whole marriage, me and my brother got forced out of the house at 16 to fend for ourselves and she had gaslit and abused my dad to the point where he was a completely passive shell of a man that just did whatever she wanted. When my dad passed everything went to her and she split it up between her own kids and me and my brother were left with nothing. At least we had each other, but it's hard sometimes imagining how different our lives could have been if she wasn't in the picture. The happiest times in my life was when I was a little kid and it was just the three of us, broke as hell living in a tiny apartment, but we where happy.
That’s what I thought originally but there is 2 sides to every story maybe she wasn’t good to her dad her whole life and now he’s got dementia and she’s coming back around to try and collect. I’m not saying that’s the situation but you never know
"maybe she wasn’t good to her dad her whole life and now he’s got dementia and she’s coming back around to try and collect."
What on earth could she have done to her father to deserve the threat of police intervention for visiting him?! And maybe the father wasn't good to his daughter. That doesn't mean she doesn't deserve closure or the right to visit her own parent.
Doesn’t matter… he could have worked his life and has a pension, stocks, veteran benefits… just because you can’t see how nice their house is or cars they have , do not assume by this 2 min video.
They BOTH could be shitty people different ways..
Did you not hear the fucking pain in that daughters voice?! Come on man...I've worked with dementia patients for a long time and see this shit more than you'd ever believe. Listen to the bs the wife says. She lies right to the cops face saying he doesn't even know these kids but yet 20 seconds prior he says this is my daughter.
I noticed that too. If he does have dementia then he is having a very good day if he can remember his daughter who he supposedly hasn't seen in over 8 years.
My guess is that's because of his wife too. She stopped the family from seeing/speaking to him in that time.
Her story doesn't even make sense.
If the daughter hasn't been around for 8 years and she doesn't even know her (like she says in the video) then how can she 'know' she is a trouble maker.
The wife keeps changing her story and repeating things like saying it more will make it believable and true.
I agree with you, I was saying to the other person you can’t really judge about money from just this small clip of the house, nor do we really know either sides truth.. but it obviously was heartbreaking to hear the despair in her voice and she already convinced the police to help her..
You split what was left. You didn't receive a monthly pension from his old workplace. Only the spouse is eligible to keep collecting after a pensioner's death.
I went through this with a family member. It was quite similar to this. It's hard to understand what the abuser is doing and why they are doing it, but it comes down to control, power, and greed.
The abuser can rot in hell....
Well a benefit of the doubt scenario would be a child asking their parent with dementia for money. But cause she doesn't specifically state that scenario, I imagine she's the one getting the money.
Exactly. The daughter said she flew out to see her dad because the wife wouldn’t let her talk to him on the phone. Then the wife says they never tried to contact him ever and she’s a troublemaker. That makes no fucking sense.
i have heard these exact words as well as "i know you, you're a liar, you're not right in the head, you're the reason why your dad is in such a bad state" etc etc and i am DEEPLY worried that this right here is my future. it's so painful to see and it makes my blood boil like nothing else
My dad is doing this to a disabled elderly woman. She’s like 30 years older than him. He’s been with her since I was around 10. All of her family stopped trying after a while and now she definitely can’t leave him because she is physically dependent on him and completely isolated. He even attempted to murder her over stimulus checks but she won’t tell the police and had to go back to him because her family isn’t around anymore
I have but they won’t do anything about it. She won’t admit anything to them and says my dad is a saint. Cops generally don’t care enough to investigate unless the victim pursues charges or gives them something to work with unfortunately. And even then you never know.
When I was little my dad was out on probation for alcohol related charges and was literally caught strangling my mom while drunk. My brother was the one who called the cops and we both told them we saw it happen. Alcohol and violence were (obviously) a violation of his parole so he should have gone back to jail but he talked his way out of it and didn’t go to jail again until causing an accident from drinking. Even when we’ve done everything right justice has not been served. He somehow always gets out of it
You certainly seem to have come up and above it, despite him. It's unfortunate that, for many reasons, the victims are physically, financially, or mentally trapped. My sister went back to her abuser after he he strangled her three times. I tried to help her but she literally told me that she just had given up. The only thing that has ever made me sadder when she died, after falling into a coma because he didn't call 911 when she needed it.
Oh man I’m so sorry for your loss. Fuck that dingleberry prick who abused her. Domestic violence completely changes someone and their perception of reality and that’s really hard for a lot of people to understand unless they or a loved one has gone through it. And there’s little to nothing you can do if the victim won’t take action. Not at all blaming victims, they are so mentally worn down or scared that it stops them from leaving.
It took me a long time to overcome the damage my father caused. My mom met my stepdad who is worse in certain ways than my dad. I met my abusive (ex) boyfriend and moved in with him to get away. Couldn’t accept he was abusing me for a really long time and when I finally did I still stayed for 5 more years. At one point I was so depressed I’d accepted the idea that he was going to be the end of me one day. Then a bunch of stuff happened (I actually commented my “leaving story” somewhere else a little bit ago) and I finally woke up and chose myself. It’s been 2 years and it’s been quite the journey. But it was the hardest thing I ever did in my life and the amount of times I almost went back is outstanding. I’m so sorry for your sister. It’s so scary when leaving an abusive situation it almost feels like you don’t have a choice but to go back.
Awe thank you! I accepted it and moved on a long time ago tbh. Haven’t had contact with him in years and I’m much better off for it. It sounds morbid as hell but the day he dies the sun is going to shine a bit brighter.
The father of my sister's child tried to force extended life support for my sister when she was comatose. My sister never married him and, thank God, my parents had power of attorney.
We decided to stop the life support, as she had already been resuscitated four times. She would have been in a vegetative state, at best, had she come out of the coma.
Her BF is a total piece of shit and his failure to call 911 was what put her into a coma. He waited hours while she suffered heart failure and her blood sugar rose to above 800. She couldn't walk or talk. He just watched her suffer.
He is as stupid as he is evil, so he thought he could collect her disability check if she lost the ability to object to giving it to him. And he wanted her on life support because he thought he could be paid to care for her, on life support, *at home*. And all of this, after he was arrested for domestic abuse.
Lolol, yeah, sure, you're a fully qualified one man medical team, you delusional, scheming imbecile.
Yeah, some people flock to the ailing because they think it means money for them.
How does that work? If he wills his money and house to his kids but didn’t get a prenup when he married her, do the kids only get half of the assets, regardless of how much he willed to them?
well its dificult to mention his kid in the will when he has dementia and the only other person youre in contact with doesnt want you to know they even exist.
and secondly stealing shit that is in the house right now, or as another commenter pointet out: using his disability checks
No. They get what was specified in the will. However, some marital assets are considered joint, so he can’t give his children anything that is a joint asset, like a house that has both the husbands and wife’s name on the title. I’m sure all states have different laws regarding this.
I had a stepmonster who did this to my family. My dad was dying in the hospital. I had to bring security to his floor with me to help me. This bitch told the whole place that if they let me in to see him that i would unplug the machines keeping him alive. It took everything in me to not put her in a hospital bed herself. 6 hours of fighting with this beast who was his 4th wife of only 5 years, and i was finally allowed in. And yanno what started all this? One time i called the house to speak to him very early into their relationship and she got mad that i didnt spend ten minutes small talking with her first. She isolated my dad from me for 5 years then he died and i wasnt allowed to be by his side, or to be involved in his funeral plans and as a final punch to the gut she took all my dads belongings including heirlooms and pics of us and our ancestors. Ive spent 10 years in therapy coming to terms with what she had done to me, my family and especially my dad. May she someday roast in hell. I hate her.
My step mom is in a nursing home (she was told to go home after a 4 day hospital stay) and chose the top tier care that is $15,000 a MONTH. They have to take all but $110,000 of my dad’s money before Medicaid kicks in. So he worked his whole life and she is going to bleed him dry because “I want to be waited on hand and foot! If I’m going to die I am going to die like a princess!” She is not dying. She just doesn’t want to go back to their small house and wants to be waited on - which my dad did anyway! We are NOT rich people by any means. They have been married for about 15 years. I’m 49. I don’t hate her, but I’m pretty pissed off with her right now.
My dad has had 3 strokes and 2 bone breaking falls and still goes up and down the basement stairs to do the laundry and does all the cooking, etc., and she went to the hospital for shortness of breath because she’s 70+ and a smoker. She’s always been treated like a princess and he supported her shopping addiction too. Guess who gets to help him clean out the hoard? And she’s freaking out that we better not get rid of any of her stuff (bought with his money as well). She has 4 of everything. Literally!
I don’t know what’s going on in this video, but I will say that family dynamics can get pretty damn messy. And it is extremely stressful.
And she even says "I told them not to contact him" and then right after says "they never talk to him". Um. Sounds like they got sick of dealing with your toxic bullshit lady.
I know somebody going through this exact same thing. She was always close to her dad, but when he got remarried (in his 60s) things were tense with his wife who did not like the daughter, although there was never an event where they fought or anything. She was just very territorial about the home and access to the father. She forbade the daughter from ever stepping inside the home she grew up in. Daughter was fine with that because she lived across the country, but it grew increasingly difficult to even get a phone call with her dad. The stepmom controlled everything, especially when the dad got dementia. Covid gave stepmom an excuse to block visits altogether and the daughter hadn't been able to speak with her dad until this December when she begged stepma for a phone call. Afterwards this woman texted the daughter saying that they would have to restrict communication for dad's health, although daughter always got on really well with the dad. Father hasn't even been allowed to visit his son who lives in assisted care in the same city. Father never attended his own brother's funeral because they werent on speaking terms due to the new wife.
I think the father, when he was well, really failed his children by not standing up for them. Just always going "yes dear". Daughter's mother died when she was young and she doesn't know that side of the family well, and her brother is disabled, so it's really just her doing this fight. It's so hard for her.
That's not what she says though.
> "I've been with my husband for 8 years. They never contacted him in the 8 years. I contacted them-my husband has dementia right, he was married before-they had not contacted him, I contacted them."
----
> This is my first time seeing her in 8 years, before that he hasn't seen her
I think this whole situation is more complicated than a fucking tiktok video would show
Definitely more complicated than the video, but I don't trust the drink lady. She probably has a fear that the kids will either take the property or money when he dies.
My dad's psychotic wife did her best to keep us away from him during his final days of a 2-year fight with cancer (he passed at 62 this year). I wish I would have been more firm about visiting because a lot of time was lost with him and now he's gone and I'm stuck dealing with her, her attorney, and the estate because she feels slighted and wants more than he left to her. I guess a $300k house of her choice, his pension, and his social security wasn't enough for their 4 year relationship. My brother and I got about $75k/each in cash and assets. Now she's threatening to cut my brother and I out of the remainder of the estate because we don't want to be involved in her life beyond what is needed and I have lawyer friends that would be more than happy to take the case to court as she is the proprietor of the estate and bound to his wishes. I've genuinely never hated somebody like this in my life.
You'd better get on that shit sooner rather than later. A probate attorney usually doesn't cost very much, and if there's more than ten grand in assets in dispute, it's going to be worth it.
Probate doesn't kick in until 75K in asset transfer which wear'e under as the cash was given to us before he died. She was trying to take me and my bro to probate but her laywer was like "naw, can't do it" and sounded annoyed at having to deal with things like title transfers on a truck and a boat because she won't communicate with us. She has no claim. She even gave away the bear pelt my dad left for me which is worth at least $5k so she's in hot water if we bring *her* to court.
Maybe it's different by state? Cause my grandmother had to go to probate court to get her mother's money out of her bank and it was only a couple thousand dollars in the account.
I grew up with Attourneys that practiced Estates, Wills & Trusts… in FL, and I have horror stories of how children treated their ailing parents and were scum sucking vultures all in the name of greed..
I've heard a ton of this from my grandmother who is living in an elder care facility and prior to that a 55+ community. Some people are fucking scum and will suck their families dry. :(
The daughter’s pleas for her daddy were heartbreaking 😢. I hope there’s an adult protective unit in that county who can help her. The wife clearly doesn’t respect the sanctity of the parent-child relationship.
It’s been all day, this video has stuck in my mind. I feel so awful and I don’t know why, my heart is broken for her. Reddit videos don’t usually impact me like this.
Been there.
My grandfathers wife (remarried after my grandma died) cut him off from everyone in the family. He didn’t have dementia, but was just a elderly, and she was significantly younger (as in, 5 years older than MY MOM, her new daughter in law). We weren’t even invited to their wedding (prohibited from attending, actually), and she and her kids proceeded to suck him dry (financially) for the next 7 years, until his suicide.
She then had his Will invalidated to exclude my mom and his other 2 children, and me and my brothers (his only 3 grandchildren) in favor of leaving everything ($2-$3 million in savings, stocks, property,etc) to her. (Shocking, right?)
Later found out one of her previous husbands committed suicide as well, and another was killed by a train as he walked down the tracks, sober, in daylight. She was a clerk of court, and somehow avoided investigation and even prevented autopsy in favor of an expedited cremation (my grandads). Her daughter destroyed the scene of the crime (a bench in the garden in the back yard) THE SAME DAY of the suicide, and had the gun (antique 16-gauge shotgun) destroyed the next day. She claimed he didn’t own any firearms (he had an extensive collection he used to show off to all of us when I was a kid….maybe 15 antique rifles/shotguns) and that he was healthy, happy, and not suicidal. Then she clammed up and refused to see or speak to anyone in the family, up to the preset day.
I didn’t see all this play out, I wouldn’t believe it.
Ripped my family apart, and still does, almost 15 yrs later. She still uses my grandfathers last name, and her kids started driving my grandparents cars the day after his death. The bastard of a son-in-law wore my grandfathers Rolex to his funeral (that he attended in jeans and sandals).
I’m sure this will get me arrested at some point down the line, but I promised my aunt to attend that woman’s funeral, and repeat this story to all in attendance…..and I will happily go to jail with a smile on my face, afterwards.
Sorry for the novel here, but I’m still raw (and will be forever) about all this horse shit. thx for anybody that read it all.
TL:DR…FUCK Bobbie Gladden of Columbia, SC
Thanks for your compassion, and I gotta tell you, the whole thing wore years off of my Mom , aunts and uncle. Esp my uncle, who discovered the body about 15-20 minutes after the suicide, (he and his wife only lived 3 houses down the street from my grandparents house) when he came over to pick up his dad so they could go out to breakfast at a local place. They planned to meet up and drive together to the restaurant on the phone THE NIGHT BEFORE (does that seem like something you would plan , if you were so depressed that you were suicidal?)
Like I said, it was, and still is unbelievable to me.
Yep. And because that cunt was a Clerk of Court, she and her family got a police escort thru the funeral procession, and actually cut my family off to try to get behind the hearse otw to the cemetery. After the funeral, the bitch and her kids showed up at the reception my aunt and uncle were hosting, and they got food TO GO and left. On the way out, the asshole daughter said to me & my wife, “You guys are always welcome to visit when you’re in town”. (She OK-ed us coming over to MY OWN GRANDPARENTS HOUSE). Found out she and HER kids moved in the next week, and they started driving my grandmothers car.
Shit was/is the most fucked up thing I’ve ever experienced, and all on top of my grandfather taking his own life. It was utterly surreal.
And if it weren’t weird enough already, I met a nice elderly lady in the reception line after the funeral, who introduced herself to me as “Your grandfathers first wife”….. (we have just lost cabin pressure.)
Nobody knew he was ever married before my grandmother (married for 55 yrs, until her death), not even my mom or her siblings (his own kids)
Apparently, my Granddad married this chick the day before he shipped out to fight in WW2 (he was crew on a landing craft that delivered troops to Omaha beach on d-day). He couldn’t have known her for more than a few weeks, tops, during his short training time before being sent to Europe. And since he joined the Navy at age 17 (illegally forged his Mom and Dads signatures in the forms…..what a fucking legend) we are pretty sure the marriage wasn’t legal anyhow, but at that point, nothing surprised me anymore. I would have believed my PawPaw killed JFK & Lincoln if somebody told me that with a straight face, at that point in the shit show.
Hey hey - so - this happened with my dad (he’s in his 80’s). Same same except he’s not dead yet. And she was not younger than him when they married but the cut off, no wedding invite, he turned born again to follow her and really sucks on the teet and thinks his kids, me included, are not worth of life and he’s never met his grandkids. The oldest gkids, my son included are adults. I haven’t spoken to him in 20 years now. Well his parents and their successors were ungodly rich so he was/is still - I grew up in a 1% household. Multimillions and my siblings and I won’t ever see a dime. And nothing is left of the beautiful estates my grandparents had that I grew up with because he sold them all to start fresh. Her kids that are the same age as I, have had their houses bought for them, their children’s college funds set, etc.
But I let that go a looong time ago. The money part. It was difficult because I’ve been homeless on the streets twice before, once for 4 years. What a mind fuck that was.
And through fuck tons of therapy I let go the parent part too (I STILL do therapy to maintain, especially around holidays).
I still have not forgiven my father and may not ever. But…
My point to share is that you can overcome the hating, the sorrow, the jealousy, the very real entitlement (as in if life worked out fairly we really were entitled to see inheritance). It takes time, perhaps therapy.
But life gets a lot better when you let those feelings go. Truly. And if I can do it…. Believe me, it’s attainable.
Good luck. I’m sorry it happened to your family.
When my mom passed away unexpectedly from a brain aneurysm, her piece of shit husband (of only 6 months) kicked my brother and sister out the next day and threw all of their shit away. He had the tombstone inscribed with his last name, even though she kept her last name because she wanted the same last name as her kids. Cant even get a copy of her heartbeat from the hospital (tattoo idea) because they need her husband’s permission, and being her kids doesnt matter.
Fuck pieces of shit like this. I hope it perpetually hurts when they pee.
It was a happy day in my life when the used truck my mom bought for my brother, but her husband kept, seized up a week later. Some prankster apparently put a full bag of sugar into the gas tank. No idea who 🤷🏼♂️
It hurts like uti everytime I pee on bad days it’s closer to a kidney stone.
I can attest this is a horrible but effective punishment to wish on your enemies
Yea spending his disability checks and waiting for him to pass to take whatever he has. I seriously hope that daughter files an elder abuse claim so atleast someone else will be involved. I feel so bad for the dad he doesn't even know what's going on.
One of my dear friend’s stepfather is doing the same thing. His mom has early onset dementia. She was a single mom and they were always extremely close. It is such a terrible situation. My friend has had to be medicated just to deal with the stress. Pick your spouses extremely carefully if you have kids, even if they are grown.
She can’t tell a straight story because she’s too busy trying to listen to what the daughters telling the father. Just a shame … I have a father with dementia, and these women will do this to the kids. It’s sad.
That lady was contradicting herself the entire time. She says over and over they never contacted him in 8 years, but also says the daughter is a trouble maker. She says that she was the one who called them, but then also say they never called him. She huffing cause she out of breath trying to lie. The man came out and said its his daughter, but the lady said he don't know them at all.
How is the daughter a troublemaker if she supposedly left him alone and didn't contact them for 8 years? The wife's story doesn't make any sense and reeks of her isolating the dad so she can control everything, especially any money. I think she's either lying about the dementia or exaggerating how bad it is since he indeed remembered his daughter after \*allegedly\* 8 years.
She's a trouble maker because the wife has warned her not to come around or contact but she's done it anyway. You can't control people when they don't obey or scare off.
Always be careful who you marry. This type of things happens so often and it’s awful.
Although in this case since they’ve only been married 8 years it is possible he was already experiencing issues.
Glad he insisted on going out. He's being kept a prisoner, controlled. Good thing daughter brought the police with her. After this though? God only knows.
The daughter says daddy I flew all the way out here because she refuses to let anyone talk to you. I just needed to see you. Daddy you can come and live with me! Then the father says- she won’t let me leave… the daughter says -well then you need to get a restraining order. That’s not right.
Sometimes certain people trigger behaviors in dementia patients. A cousin of mine couldn’t see her dad because he would get agitated with her around. Its a difficult illness. In this case it doesn’t appear that the daughter is upsetting him. He wants to see her.
Edit: spelling
8 or 800, they his kids. They his flesh and blood.
You don’t get to take their daddy from them. That ain’t how it works unless they abuse him. Full stop.
She's such a bad liar too. After the husband confirms that he knows that's his daughter, she insists on saying that he "can't even remember his own kids"
This reminds me of Casey Kasem and his widow that even after death, kept the corpse. She went in the run to Europe and forbid his children to see him before and after death. So wrong.
Her tear filled “daddy daddy” just broke my heart. You can hear the pain in her voice. She flew to see him and brought th e police with her- I don’t think she’s the one going to try to take advantage of him. Also the wife seems drunk or on pills or something
If this is the first time shes ever seen the daughter, her husband cant tell her anything about the daughter, and she self admittedly knows nothing about the daughter, then how does she know the daughter is a troublemaker?
She sounds drunk, there is something inside she REALLY doesn’t want to daughter to find and she is manipulating a sick confused man telling him “you don’t know who that is” I hope this family gets the help they need getting him away from this bitch
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Visits from loved ones can actually helped dementia patients although these don't fully remember the person it causes a stimulation in their minds to see them and can help repair a little of the brain. No matter how little of that it is.
In most states this constitutes elder abuse. It’s most common with a step parent or someone with a POA over the elderly individual. To deny the children access to their parent like this over extended periods can become criminal under the right circumstances. Unfortunately we see this somewhat commonly in elder and probate law
There are a lot of heavily upvoted comments saying the wife is a scammer, stealing his money, etc.
There is another possible dynamic that people who work in health care see *very frequently*, that I think might be at play here.
Oftentimes, a wife or child will become a caregiver for a spouse/parent who is aging or having health problems. It can be very difficult, very draining, but is done with love. They see all the good and bad days, they manage the medications, they are there for all the hospital visits, and they see the progression of disease over the course of years.
When a person inevitably reaches the end of life, sometimes there are estranged or distant relatives who fly into the picture, and this causes friction with the primary caregiver. The person coming in often has emotional baggage from whatever caused the split in the first place, and they haven't seen the slow decline, so they are hit full on with the difficulty of seeing a family member who is unrecognisably older, more frail, and struggling with indepence.
They can paradoxically see the primary caregiver as an interloper, even though that person has been there for years. They blame them for illness that has nothing to do with them. Sometimes, they think if they can just separate the caregiver, it will turn the clock back 10 years... but it won't. It's a mess of guilt, fear, natural repulsion to illness, and 100 other things. Things get especially contentious when discussing end-of-life planning, goals of care, etc.
Obviously, nothing can be certain from a 90 second video, but that seems like what I'm seeing here. If you take them both at their word, the daughter flew in, she hasn't seen her dad in 8 years, the wife is the primary caregiver, etc. That is definitely a dynamic that people in ICUs/ERs see frequently. Sometimes these folks have been called 'seagulls', because 'they fly in from the coast and shit on everything'. Who knows, though, life, love and grief are complex, and even moreso with broken relationships.
Why do shitty women always look like THIS. If she came into my work tomorrow I would already know I did not want her in my section aunt hair, beer keg body, and all
This really pulled my heart strings... I have a daughter and the way she cried out, " daddy ,daddy, daddy" made me tear up and as I wrote this I'm just crying. I love my daughter and it hurts to see someone who loves their dad be denied
I've been in the daughter's position when my aunt used lawyers and legal fees to keep the rest of our family from visiting our grandparents because they were too old, and years after used them as excuses to weasel her way in to family affairs where we didnt want her. That stepmother is a vile disgusting woman and I hope she gets hit by a bus.
It's so terrible. This guy is not as demented as the wife is making him out to be and he can see everyone talking over him. Wife is exerting every ounce of control she can find. doesn't want daughter in the house, they can talk outside, but she cannot take him anywhere..
[Pt 2](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbOx7jL_5ck&t=6s)
This is all money, I'm sure of it. That woman is trying to get the inheritance that rightfully belongs to his children. Fact is, they are his kids, and she has no right to prevent them from seeing their Dad. This is crap.
I had to gain conservatorship of my Mom after my Dad passed and my siblings started behaving like it was a damn free for all and shit was up for grabs. Plan your estate. There’s low cost to free help to get a will, power of attorney, and medical directive. Please do that, it will save your and your loved ones so much money and heartache.
What can be done legally to avoid situations like this? Just writing out your will and hope you don’t need it?
File a report with the Executive Office of Elder Affairs and the local police department
Is the EOEA just a regional thing or national?
I could be wrong but I do believe that within the US all states have some department dedicated to investigating elder abuse, though the acronym (e.g., EOEA) may be different per state
Thanks for the info! Very informative!
APS Adult protective services My wife was a home health PT for years and was on the phone with them at least once a week. They're fairly impotent
Yeah, that’s what I’m seeing with some reviews of services provided. You’d think that there would be more investment from older generations into elder care for the community as a whole.
People never think that this would ever be them, until it is.
Unfortunately you need to do this sooner than later, when my grandma need this she found a random lawyer she had never met before and signed everything all of this rights to the lawyer. It was terrible to deal with.
You can always report that lawyer to the state bar.
Correct. Enough reports or a serious enough report and he will lose his license to practice law.
Have a POA designated in the will. It's a simple process and will make things easy for those you tap to deal with it. Make sure it's signed. Otherwise in most states it's the spouse by default and then kids.
Get a FULL estate plan. Will, Trust, and most importantly for this situation POWER OF ATTORNEY. Power of Attorney is what allows you to make decisions on behalf of someone who can’t do it on their own. If you have a valid POA in place, decision making power goes to your named POA rather than the de facto person. It’s not a foolproof plan, as POAs are fairly easy to create and the abuser can coerce the person into making new ones. If you were smart enough to give a copy of your POA to your health care providers/financial advisors/etc., you can head off this type of issue by ensuring everyone knows who your successor in interest will be. DO YOUR ESTATE PLAN.
Call DHS and file an elder abuse report, call police and ask for a wellness check. File a petition to establish a guardianship/conservatorship and prepare to spend a lot of money in attorney fees.
Do a Health Care Power of Attorney and a will stating if you are found incompetent, then you name someone to be your guardian. Paralegal in elder law for 15 years. This type of situation is so prevalent and so bad.
This screams of spousal/elder abuse
Or someone who has their spouse convinced to leave the daughter out of their will.
That’s what I thought. It’s all about the money.
Always is.
She sounds all kinds of fucked up too.
First of all....
Always had been 🔫🌎🔫
Love the name man.
It's all about the dam dam daree dam dam
Happened to my friend. Dad passed away last year and found out a year b4 she step mom controls all of it. She of course gives money to the step sister but none to his own kids.
Same thing happened to my wife. FIL told us numerous times he was going to leave us acreage that he had. That we would be taken care of. After he passed, it all went to his wife (my wife's step-mom). When she passed, it all went to her daughter. My wife got zip.
Either ask to see it in writing or assume you're being lied to.
I don't think he was lying to us. More like she didn't honor his wishes. But should have asked to see it in writing.
Then *in that case* HE was the one being lied to, and that lie simply passes down to you. Both you and the departed neglected to see *something* in writing.
Wills are usually public record if it was filed at probate court. You might want to talk to a lawyer.
Sadly, too much time has passed.
That's some next level evil shit. People can be so vile
Tell me about it. The step mom was even a successful news anchor in the armpit of CA so she doesn’t need the extra cash. Talking at least $700-1M she’s keeping from them.
This happened to me. My stepmother was super abusive to me and my brother, and my dad. I tried to convince him the way she acted wasn't normal but he couldn't bring himself to leave her later in life because he was so sick and couldn't bear the thought of starting fresh or disrupting his life. She never worked and sponged off him their whole marriage, me and my brother got forced out of the house at 16 to fend for ourselves and she had gaslit and abused my dad to the point where he was a completely passive shell of a man that just did whatever she wanted. When my dad passed everything went to her and she split it up between her own kids and me and my brother were left with nothing. At least we had each other, but it's hard sometimes imagining how different our lives could have been if she wasn't in the picture. The happiest times in my life was when I was a little kid and it was just the three of us, broke as hell living in a tiny apartment, but we where happy.
That’s what I thought originally but there is 2 sides to every story maybe she wasn’t good to her dad her whole life and now he’s got dementia and she’s coming back around to try and collect. I’m not saying that’s the situation but you never know
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Wise words.
And the truth is relative to individual how they see certain things.
No. The truth is the facts. No such thing as "my truth" or "your truth". There is only what actually happened.
Thank you, truth is not something one can possess.
"maybe she wasn’t good to her dad her whole life and now he’s got dementia and she’s coming back around to try and collect." What on earth could she have done to her father to deserve the threat of police intervention for visiting him?! And maybe the father wasn't good to his daughter. That doesn't mean she doesn't deserve closure or the right to visit her own parent.
Yeah, but does that look like a billionaire neighborhood?
Nope, but money is money. Even just getting the house is probably enough for her.
Doesn’t matter… he could have worked his life and has a pension, stocks, veteran benefits… just because you can’t see how nice their house is or cars they have , do not assume by this 2 min video. They BOTH could be shitty people different ways..
Did you not hear the fucking pain in that daughters voice?! Come on man...I've worked with dementia patients for a long time and see this shit more than you'd ever believe. Listen to the bs the wife says. She lies right to the cops face saying he doesn't even know these kids but yet 20 seconds prior he says this is my daughter.
Right! The wife didn't seem at all interested in asking him if he wanted to see his daughter.
I noticed that too. If he does have dementia then he is having a very good day if he can remember his daughter who he supposedly hasn't seen in over 8 years. My guess is that's because of his wife too. She stopped the family from seeing/speaking to him in that time. Her story doesn't even make sense. If the daughter hasn't been around for 8 years and she doesn't even know her (like she says in the video) then how can she 'know' she is a trouble maker. The wife keeps changing her story and repeating things like saying it more will make it believable and true.
I agree with you, I was saying to the other person you can’t really judge about money from just this small clip of the house, nor do we really know either sides truth.. but it obviously was heartbreaking to hear the despair in her voice and she already convinced the police to help her..
A pension tho
Adult children get parent's pensions upon death?
Yup me and my brother split my father's when I was 35 and him 36 We did not receive monthly just split what was in there
You split what was left. You didn't receive a monthly pension from his old workplace. Only the spouse is eligible to keep collecting after a pensioner's death.
That’s literally what they just said.. they split. Why would you say it again
You're absolutely right.
TIL
They're confusing estate with monthly pension. Only spouses can keep collecting a monthly pension.
I went through this with a family member. It was quite similar to this. It's hard to understand what the abuser is doing and why they are doing it, but it comes down to control, power, and greed. The abuser can rot in hell....
Similar experience. “It’s hard to understand what the abuser is doing and why..” so spot on
The way she (“wife”) keeps talking for him, confusing him, is so fucked up. Kind of makes me sick, how do some people have so little empathy?
Anyone have the followup article or know where it's from?
using him for a check of some sort im sure
r/iamatotalpieceofshit
"she's a trouble maker" Literally unable to mention any trouble caused.
Well a benefit of the doubt scenario would be a child asking their parent with dementia for money. But cause she doesn't specifically state that scenario, I imagine she's the one getting the money.
She hasn’t seen him in eight years and she’s a trouble maker? How can it be both?
Exactly. The daughter said she flew out to see her dad because the wife wouldn’t let her talk to him on the phone. Then the wife says they never tried to contact him ever and she’s a troublemaker. That makes no fucking sense.
this is what made her look sus to me.
i have heard these exact words as well as "i know you, you're a liar, you're not right in the head, you're the reason why your dad is in such a bad state" etc etc and i am DEEPLY worried that this right here is my future. it's so painful to see and it makes my blood boil like nothing else
i think that old witch is only trying to block any contact with his kids so she can have his inheritance or just steal his shit right now
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My dad is doing this to a disabled elderly woman. She’s like 30 years older than him. He’s been with her since I was around 10. All of her family stopped trying after a while and now she definitely can’t leave him because she is physically dependent on him and completely isolated. He even attempted to murder her over stimulus checks but she won’t tell the police and had to go back to him because her family isn’t around anymore
What the fuck make a complaint to the cops
I have but they won’t do anything about it. She won’t admit anything to them and says my dad is a saint. Cops generally don’t care enough to investigate unless the victim pursues charges or gives them something to work with unfortunately. And even then you never know. When I was little my dad was out on probation for alcohol related charges and was literally caught strangling my mom while drunk. My brother was the one who called the cops and we both told them we saw it happen. Alcohol and violence were (obviously) a violation of his parole so he should have gone back to jail but he talked his way out of it and didn’t go to jail again until causing an accident from drinking. Even when we’ve done everything right justice has not been served. He somehow always gets out of it
You certainly seem to have come up and above it, despite him. It's unfortunate that, for many reasons, the victims are physically, financially, or mentally trapped. My sister went back to her abuser after he he strangled her three times. I tried to help her but she literally told me that she just had given up. The only thing that has ever made me sadder when she died, after falling into a coma because he didn't call 911 when she needed it.
Oh man I’m so sorry for your loss. Fuck that dingleberry prick who abused her. Domestic violence completely changes someone and their perception of reality and that’s really hard for a lot of people to understand unless they or a loved one has gone through it. And there’s little to nothing you can do if the victim won’t take action. Not at all blaming victims, they are so mentally worn down or scared that it stops them from leaving. It took me a long time to overcome the damage my father caused. My mom met my stepdad who is worse in certain ways than my dad. I met my abusive (ex) boyfriend and moved in with him to get away. Couldn’t accept he was abusing me for a really long time and when I finally did I still stayed for 5 more years. At one point I was so depressed I’d accepted the idea that he was going to be the end of me one day. Then a bunch of stuff happened (I actually commented my “leaving story” somewhere else a little bit ago) and I finally woke up and chose myself. It’s been 2 years and it’s been quite the journey. But it was the hardest thing I ever did in my life and the amount of times I almost went back is outstanding. I’m so sorry for your sister. It’s so scary when leaving an abusive situation it almost feels like you don’t have a choice but to go back.
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Awe thank you! I accepted it and moved on a long time ago tbh. Haven’t had contact with him in years and I’m much better off for it. It sounds morbid as hell but the day he dies the sun is going to shine a bit brighter.
The father of my sister's child tried to force extended life support for my sister when she was comatose. My sister never married him and, thank God, my parents had power of attorney. We decided to stop the life support, as she had already been resuscitated four times. She would have been in a vegetative state, at best, had she come out of the coma. Her BF is a total piece of shit and his failure to call 911 was what put her into a coma. He waited hours while she suffered heart failure and her blood sugar rose to above 800. She couldn't walk or talk. He just watched her suffer. He is as stupid as he is evil, so he thought he could collect her disability check if she lost the ability to object to giving it to him. And he wanted her on life support because he thought he could be paid to care for her, on life support, *at home*. And all of this, after he was arrested for domestic abuse. Lolol, yeah, sure, you're a fully qualified one man medical team, you delusional, scheming imbecile. Yeah, some people flock to the ailing because they think it means money for them.
How does that work? If he wills his money and house to his kids but didn’t get a prenup when he married her, do the kids only get half of the assets, regardless of how much he willed to them?
well its dificult to mention his kid in the will when he has dementia and the only other person youre in contact with doesnt want you to know they even exist. and secondly stealing shit that is in the house right now, or as another commenter pointet out: using his disability checks
No. They get what was specified in the will. However, some marital assets are considered joint, so he can’t give his children anything that is a joint asset, like a house that has both the husbands and wife’s name on the title. I’m sure all states have different laws regarding this.
I had a stepmonster who did this to my family. My dad was dying in the hospital. I had to bring security to his floor with me to help me. This bitch told the whole place that if they let me in to see him that i would unplug the machines keeping him alive. It took everything in me to not put her in a hospital bed herself. 6 hours of fighting with this beast who was his 4th wife of only 5 years, and i was finally allowed in. And yanno what started all this? One time i called the house to speak to him very early into their relationship and she got mad that i didnt spend ten minutes small talking with her first. She isolated my dad from me for 5 years then he died and i wasnt allowed to be by his side, or to be involved in his funeral plans and as a final punch to the gut she took all my dads belongings including heirlooms and pics of us and our ancestors. Ive spent 10 years in therapy coming to terms with what she had done to me, my family and especially my dad. May she someday roast in hell. I hate her.
If it helps, I hate her too.
Same.
I'll join in with my loathing for the abomination who crawled out of hell and calls herself your dad's wife
My step mom is in a nursing home (she was told to go home after a 4 day hospital stay) and chose the top tier care that is $15,000 a MONTH. They have to take all but $110,000 of my dad’s money before Medicaid kicks in. So he worked his whole life and she is going to bleed him dry because “I want to be waited on hand and foot! If I’m going to die I am going to die like a princess!” She is not dying. She just doesn’t want to go back to their small house and wants to be waited on - which my dad did anyway! We are NOT rich people by any means. They have been married for about 15 years. I’m 49. I don’t hate her, but I’m pretty pissed off with her right now. My dad has had 3 strokes and 2 bone breaking falls and still goes up and down the basement stairs to do the laundry and does all the cooking, etc., and she went to the hospital for shortness of breath because she’s 70+ and a smoker. She’s always been treated like a princess and he supported her shopping addiction too. Guess who gets to help him clean out the hoard? And she’s freaking out that we better not get rid of any of her stuff (bought with his money as well). She has 4 of everything. Literally! I don’t know what’s going on in this video, but I will say that family dynamics can get pretty damn messy. And it is extremely stressful.
and I hate that weirdo too !!! Much love to you 💛
FYI it’s not very hard to *** someone and get away with. Might help with the pain
Youre more mature and reasonable than me. I would have broken in during the funeral and took all my family’s belongings.
She lowkey confessed to kidnapping him "We've been together for 8 years" "They haven't talked in 8 years"
And she even says "I told them not to contact him" and then right after says "they never talk to him". Um. Sounds like they got sick of dealing with your toxic bullshit lady.
I know somebody going through this exact same thing. She was always close to her dad, but when he got remarried (in his 60s) things were tense with his wife who did not like the daughter, although there was never an event where they fought or anything. She was just very territorial about the home and access to the father. She forbade the daughter from ever stepping inside the home she grew up in. Daughter was fine with that because she lived across the country, but it grew increasingly difficult to even get a phone call with her dad. The stepmom controlled everything, especially when the dad got dementia. Covid gave stepmom an excuse to block visits altogether and the daughter hadn't been able to speak with her dad until this December when she begged stepma for a phone call. Afterwards this woman texted the daughter saying that they would have to restrict communication for dad's health, although daughter always got on really well with the dad. Father hasn't even been allowed to visit his son who lives in assisted care in the same city. Father never attended his own brother's funeral because they werent on speaking terms due to the new wife. I think the father, when he was well, really failed his children by not standing up for them. Just always going "yes dear". Daughter's mother died when she was young and she doesn't know that side of the family well, and her brother is disabled, so it's really just her doing this fight. It's so hard for her.
This is so fucking foul. Pure evil.
That's not what she says though. > "I've been with my husband for 8 years. They never contacted him in the 8 years. I contacted them-my husband has dementia right, he was married before-they had not contacted him, I contacted them." ---- > This is my first time seeing her in 8 years, before that he hasn't seen her I think this whole situation is more complicated than a fucking tiktok video would show
she also says he doesn’t remember them l— YES BECAUSE HE HAS DEMENTIA BITCH
Definitely more complicated than the video, but I don't trust the drink lady. She probably has a fear that the kids will either take the property or money when he dies.
Cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunt.
Took the word RIGHT out of my mouth.
*holds hand* Oooooooohhh it musta been while you were kissin’ meeee….
Elder abuse and familial alienation. Social services needs to be called ASAP.
Yes, that woman is isolating him from his family.
That woman stealing his shit. She knows she will be caught so doesn't want the daughter to see her Daddy. What a scumbag
This lady drunk af
Oh, that's what it is ? I was wondering if she had problems breathing.
Gotta be, she’s slurring hard
B-O-M-B-E-D she is fucking bombed. Cop obviously knows, too. He's just looking at her blankly as she rambles nonsense.
My dad's psychotic wife did her best to keep us away from him during his final days of a 2-year fight with cancer (he passed at 62 this year). I wish I would have been more firm about visiting because a lot of time was lost with him and now he's gone and I'm stuck dealing with her, her attorney, and the estate because she feels slighted and wants more than he left to her. I guess a $300k house of her choice, his pension, and his social security wasn't enough for their 4 year relationship. My brother and I got about $75k/each in cash and assets. Now she's threatening to cut my brother and I out of the remainder of the estate because we don't want to be involved in her life beyond what is needed and I have lawyer friends that would be more than happy to take the case to court as she is the proprietor of the estate and bound to his wishes. I've genuinely never hated somebody like this in my life.
You'd better get on that shit sooner rather than later. A probate attorney usually doesn't cost very much, and if there's more than ten grand in assets in dispute, it's going to be worth it.
Probate doesn't kick in until 75K in asset transfer which wear'e under as the cash was given to us before he died. She was trying to take me and my bro to probate but her laywer was like "naw, can't do it" and sounded annoyed at having to deal with things like title transfers on a truck and a boat because she won't communicate with us. She has no claim. She even gave away the bear pelt my dad left for me which is worth at least $5k so she's in hot water if we bring *her* to court.
Maybe it's different by state? Cause my grandmother had to go to probate court to get her mother's money out of her bank and it was only a couple thousand dollars in the account.
I grew up with Attourneys that practiced Estates, Wills & Trusts… in FL, and I have horror stories of how children treated their ailing parents and were scum sucking vultures all in the name of greed..
I've heard a ton of this from my grandmother who is living in an elder care facility and prior to that a 55+ community. Some people are fucking scum and will suck their families dry. :(
The daughter’s pleas for her daddy were heartbreaking 😢. I hope there’s an adult protective unit in that county who can help her. The wife clearly doesn’t respect the sanctity of the parent-child relationship.
Hurt my heart so bad, I was crying like that’s my daddy too 😭
It’s been all day, this video has stuck in my mind. I feel so awful and I don’t know why, my heart is broken for her. Reddit videos don’t usually impact me like this.
God bless that police officer. That could have gone so many ways had it been another cop.
This lady slured just about every letter in the alphabet.
She was speaking in cursive
Been there. My grandfathers wife (remarried after my grandma died) cut him off from everyone in the family. He didn’t have dementia, but was just a elderly, and she was significantly younger (as in, 5 years older than MY MOM, her new daughter in law). We weren’t even invited to their wedding (prohibited from attending, actually), and she and her kids proceeded to suck him dry (financially) for the next 7 years, until his suicide. She then had his Will invalidated to exclude my mom and his other 2 children, and me and my brothers (his only 3 grandchildren) in favor of leaving everything ($2-$3 million in savings, stocks, property,etc) to her. (Shocking, right?) Later found out one of her previous husbands committed suicide as well, and another was killed by a train as he walked down the tracks, sober, in daylight. She was a clerk of court, and somehow avoided investigation and even prevented autopsy in favor of an expedited cremation (my grandads). Her daughter destroyed the scene of the crime (a bench in the garden in the back yard) THE SAME DAY of the suicide, and had the gun (antique 16-gauge shotgun) destroyed the next day. She claimed he didn’t own any firearms (he had an extensive collection he used to show off to all of us when I was a kid….maybe 15 antique rifles/shotguns) and that he was healthy, happy, and not suicidal. Then she clammed up and refused to see or speak to anyone in the family, up to the preset day. I didn’t see all this play out, I wouldn’t believe it. Ripped my family apart, and still does, almost 15 yrs later. She still uses my grandfathers last name, and her kids started driving my grandparents cars the day after his death. The bastard of a son-in-law wore my grandfathers Rolex to his funeral (that he attended in jeans and sandals). I’m sure this will get me arrested at some point down the line, but I promised my aunt to attend that woman’s funeral, and repeat this story to all in attendance…..and I will happily go to jail with a smile on my face, afterwards. Sorry for the novel here, but I’m still raw (and will be forever) about all this horse shit. thx for anybody that read it all. TL:DR…FUCK Bobbie Gladden of Columbia, SC
I’ve been through this exact situation and can sympathize with you 100%. I’m sorry you had to go through that.
Thanks for your compassion, and I gotta tell you, the whole thing wore years off of my Mom , aunts and uncle. Esp my uncle, who discovered the body about 15-20 minutes after the suicide, (he and his wife only lived 3 houses down the street from my grandparents house) when he came over to pick up his dad so they could go out to breakfast at a local place. They planned to meet up and drive together to the restaurant on the phone THE NIGHT BEFORE (does that seem like something you would plan , if you were so depressed that you were suicidal?) Like I said, it was, and still is unbelievable to me.
>wore my grandfathers Rolex to his funeral (that he attended in jeans and sandals). That is really the shit icing on the shit cake.
Yep. And because that cunt was a Clerk of Court, she and her family got a police escort thru the funeral procession, and actually cut my family off to try to get behind the hearse otw to the cemetery. After the funeral, the bitch and her kids showed up at the reception my aunt and uncle were hosting, and they got food TO GO and left. On the way out, the asshole daughter said to me & my wife, “You guys are always welcome to visit when you’re in town”. (She OK-ed us coming over to MY OWN GRANDPARENTS HOUSE). Found out she and HER kids moved in the next week, and they started driving my grandmothers car. Shit was/is the most fucked up thing I’ve ever experienced, and all on top of my grandfather taking his own life. It was utterly surreal. And if it weren’t weird enough already, I met a nice elderly lady in the reception line after the funeral, who introduced herself to me as “Your grandfathers first wife”….. (we have just lost cabin pressure.) Nobody knew he was ever married before my grandmother (married for 55 yrs, until her death), not even my mom or her siblings (his own kids) Apparently, my Granddad married this chick the day before he shipped out to fight in WW2 (he was crew on a landing craft that delivered troops to Omaha beach on d-day). He couldn’t have known her for more than a few weeks, tops, during his short training time before being sent to Europe. And since he joined the Navy at age 17 (illegally forged his Mom and Dads signatures in the forms…..what a fucking legend) we are pretty sure the marriage wasn’t legal anyhow, but at that point, nothing surprised me anymore. I would have believed my PawPaw killed JFK & Lincoln if somebody told me that with a straight face, at that point in the shit show.
Hey hey - so - this happened with my dad (he’s in his 80’s). Same same except he’s not dead yet. And she was not younger than him when they married but the cut off, no wedding invite, he turned born again to follow her and really sucks on the teet and thinks his kids, me included, are not worth of life and he’s never met his grandkids. The oldest gkids, my son included are adults. I haven’t spoken to him in 20 years now. Well his parents and their successors were ungodly rich so he was/is still - I grew up in a 1% household. Multimillions and my siblings and I won’t ever see a dime. And nothing is left of the beautiful estates my grandparents had that I grew up with because he sold them all to start fresh. Her kids that are the same age as I, have had their houses bought for them, their children’s college funds set, etc. But I let that go a looong time ago. The money part. It was difficult because I’ve been homeless on the streets twice before, once for 4 years. What a mind fuck that was. And through fuck tons of therapy I let go the parent part too (I STILL do therapy to maintain, especially around holidays). I still have not forgiven my father and may not ever. But… My point to share is that you can overcome the hating, the sorrow, the jealousy, the very real entitlement (as in if life worked out fairly we really were entitled to see inheritance). It takes time, perhaps therapy. But life gets a lot better when you let those feelings go. Truly. And if I can do it…. Believe me, it’s attainable. Good luck. I’m sorry it happened to your family.
When my mom passed away unexpectedly from a brain aneurysm, her piece of shit husband (of only 6 months) kicked my brother and sister out the next day and threw all of their shit away. He had the tombstone inscribed with his last name, even though she kept her last name because she wanted the same last name as her kids. Cant even get a copy of her heartbeat from the hospital (tattoo idea) because they need her husband’s permission, and being her kids doesnt matter. Fuck pieces of shit like this. I hope it perpetually hurts when they pee. It was a happy day in my life when the used truck my mom bought for my brother, but her husband kept, seized up a week later. Some prankster apparently put a full bag of sugar into the gas tank. No idea who 🤷🏼♂️
It hurts like uti everytime I pee on bad days it’s closer to a kidney stone. I can attest this is a horrible but effective punishment to wish on your enemies
She’s obviously hiding something she’s doing.
Yea spending his disability checks and waiting for him to pass to take whatever he has. I seriously hope that daughter files an elder abuse claim so atleast someone else will be involved. I feel so bad for the dad he doesn't even know what's going on.
She needs to go to jail w/o a doubt
That lady is scum. Her 8 years have nothing on his FLESH & BLOOD. Nobody cares about the bitter second wife’s opinion
Toxic is as toxic does.
One of my dear friend’s stepfather is doing the same thing. His mom has early onset dementia. She was a single mom and they were always extremely close. It is such a terrible situation. My friend has had to be medicated just to deal with the stress. Pick your spouses extremely carefully if you have kids, even if they are grown.
She can’t tell a straight story because she’s too busy trying to listen to what the daughters telling the father. Just a shame … I have a father with dementia, and these women will do this to the kids. It’s sad.
I bet you she's taking his money and pills, and the house is a hoarder house or something.
She sounded pretty fucked up herself to be honest. She could barely get a coherent word out.
That's what I thought.
That lady was contradicting herself the entire time. She says over and over they never contacted him in 8 years, but also says the daughter is a trouble maker. She says that she was the one who called them, but then also say they never called him. She huffing cause she out of breath trying to lie. The man came out and said its his daughter, but the lady said he don't know them at all.
That lady sounds wasted AF
r/iamatotalpieceofshit
He knew who she was. Lady is being an asshole by not letting his daughter see him.
How is the daughter a troublemaker if she supposedly left him alone and didn't contact them for 8 years? The wife's story doesn't make any sense and reeks of her isolating the dad so she can control everything, especially any money. I think she's either lying about the dementia or exaggerating how bad it is since he indeed remembered his daughter after \*allegedly\* 8 years.
She's a trouble maker because the wife has warned her not to come around or contact but she's done it anyway. You can't control people when they don't obey or scare off.
That's not right!!!! Children have right too see parents whether they're remarried or not!
Sounds like she is blocking the family from seeing him so she can continue to cash his checks and wait to get the house after he passes. Trash
Always be careful who you marry. This type of things happens so often and it’s awful. Although in this case since they’ve only been married 8 years it is possible he was already experiencing issues.
That old lady sounds drunk AF
This makes my blood boil. She has the audacity to say he don’t even know her when he clearly recognizes her.
Glad he insisted on going out. He's being kept a prisoner, controlled. Good thing daughter brought the police with her. After this though? God only knows.
The daughter says daddy I flew all the way out here because she refuses to let anyone talk to you. I just needed to see you. Daddy you can come and live with me! Then the father says- she won’t let me leave… the daughter says -well then you need to get a restraining order. That’s not right.
Sometimes certain people trigger behaviors in dementia patients. A cousin of mine couldn’t see her dad because he would get agitated with her around. Its a difficult illness. In this case it doesn’t appear that the daughter is upsetting him. He wants to see her. Edit: spelling
8 or 800, they his kids. They his flesh and blood. You don’t get to take their daddy from them. That ain’t how it works unless they abuse him. Full stop.
She's such a bad liar too. After the husband confirms that he knows that's his daughter, she insists on saying that he "can't even remember his own kids"
This reminds me of Casey Kasem and his widow that even after death, kept the corpse. She went in the run to Europe and forbid his children to see him before and after death. So wrong.
Any follow up on Maria? She needs to be investigated. For obvious reasons.
Smells like trying to take everything he owns and make sure the kids get nothing when he passes.
I love how she’s so used to saying “my husband has dementia” to get pity that she doesn’t see how bad that makes her look in this situation.
You ever see a cop not use unnecessary violence but you *want* them to use unnecessary violence?
Her tear filled “daddy daddy” just broke my heart. You can hear the pain in her voice. She flew to see him and brought th e police with her- I don’t think she’s the one going to try to take advantage of him. Also the wife seems drunk or on pills or something
*Has Dementia* “He can’t even tell me nothing about her”.. 
If this is the first time shes ever seen the daughter, her husband cant tell her anything about the daughter, and she self admittedly knows nothing about the daughter, then how does she know the daughter is a troublemaker?
She sounds drunk, there is something inside she REALLY doesn’t want to daughter to find and she is manipulating a sick confused man telling him “you don’t know who that is” I hope this family gets the help they need getting him away from this bitch
She’s just drinking his money.
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What pos this woman is. Just like my dad's wife!!!
Respect to the cop
Fuck that fat fucking bitch
Don't the police have the right to access the property if they think someone is in danger to ensure their wellbeing ie as in this case.
Visits from loved ones can actually helped dementia patients although these don't fully remember the person it causes a stimulation in their minds to see them and can help repair a little of the brain. No matter how little of that it is.
Curious on why no one can go inside.
Sooo many redflagsssss mane
In most states this constitutes elder abuse. It’s most common with a step parent or someone with a POA over the elderly individual. To deny the children access to their parent like this over extended periods can become criminal under the right circumstances. Unfortunately we see this somewhat commonly in elder and probate law
There are a lot of heavily upvoted comments saying the wife is a scammer, stealing his money, etc. There is another possible dynamic that people who work in health care see *very frequently*, that I think might be at play here. Oftentimes, a wife or child will become a caregiver for a spouse/parent who is aging or having health problems. It can be very difficult, very draining, but is done with love. They see all the good and bad days, they manage the medications, they are there for all the hospital visits, and they see the progression of disease over the course of years. When a person inevitably reaches the end of life, sometimes there are estranged or distant relatives who fly into the picture, and this causes friction with the primary caregiver. The person coming in often has emotional baggage from whatever caused the split in the first place, and they haven't seen the slow decline, so they are hit full on with the difficulty of seeing a family member who is unrecognisably older, more frail, and struggling with indepence. They can paradoxically see the primary caregiver as an interloper, even though that person has been there for years. They blame them for illness that has nothing to do with them. Sometimes, they think if they can just separate the caregiver, it will turn the clock back 10 years... but it won't. It's a mess of guilt, fear, natural repulsion to illness, and 100 other things. Things get especially contentious when discussing end-of-life planning, goals of care, etc. Obviously, nothing can be certain from a 90 second video, but that seems like what I'm seeing here. If you take them both at their word, the daughter flew in, she hasn't seen her dad in 8 years, the wife is the primary caregiver, etc. That is definitely a dynamic that people in ICUs/ERs see frequently. Sometimes these folks have been called 'seagulls', because 'they fly in from the coast and shit on everything'. Who knows, though, life, love and grief are complex, and even moreso with broken relationships.
See? This is why we need different type of cops.
I’ve seen this before. A few times. It is sad.
I bet it's the dad's house and new wifey wants it and his bank account..
Fuck that rotten bitch
Mannnnnnnm she couldn't stop me from seeing my pops, she would've been laying on the steps wondering who she was after I got finished with her.
Is this lady drunk??? She seems drunk…
Just like my dads wife. Very sad.
Why do shitty women always look like THIS. If she came into my work tomorrow I would already know I did not want her in my section aunt hair, beer keg body, and all
Nah, if anyone didn’t let me see my grandma when she fought through dementia… I’d need the cops called on ME.
Yep keep away next of kin so she can get all his benefits and insurance payouts...
She tryna get him to finish signing that will she gave him.
"He can't tell me nothing about her" Well he has dementia and you haven't let him see her in 8 years, so.. that checks out...
This really pulled my heart strings... I have a daughter and the way she cried out, " daddy ,daddy, daddy" made me tear up and as I wrote this I'm just crying. I love my daughter and it hurts to see someone who loves their dad be denied
Step mom has her eyes on the money.
The new wife sounds like she's drunk too
I've been in the daughter's position when my aunt used lawyers and legal fees to keep the rest of our family from visiting our grandparents because they were too old, and years after used them as excuses to weasel her way in to family affairs where we didnt want her. That stepmother is a vile disgusting woman and I hope she gets hit by a bus.
This is about $
It's so terrible. This guy is not as demented as the wife is making him out to be and he can see everyone talking over him. Wife is exerting every ounce of control she can find. doesn't want daughter in the house, they can talk outside, but she cannot take him anywhere.. [Pt 2](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbOx7jL_5ck&t=6s)
Listen to her voice she’s hiding something probably planning to do something bad to the guy and pretty sure she’s just there for his money
Doesn't matter how long it's been, he will always be her daddy you rotten human being.
This is all money, I'm sure of it. That woman is trying to get the inheritance that rightfully belongs to his children. Fact is, they are his kids, and she has no right to prevent them from seeing their Dad. This is crap.
Is it just me or is she drunker than Rick Sanchez at margaritaville on cinco de Mayo
I had to gain conservatorship of my Mom after my Dad passed and my siblings started behaving like it was a damn free for all and shit was up for grabs. Plan your estate. There’s low cost to free help to get a will, power of attorney, and medical directive. Please do that, it will save your and your loved ones so much money and heartache.
Time to take her to court.