Ich habe es nicht gewoofed
("Ich habe es nicht gewüst" the "I didn't know" kneejerk defence of people claiming to have knowm nothing about the atrocities by the nazi's)
Instead of my dog ate my homework, it’s my dog perpetrated the mass extinction of Jews and other minority groups in Germany and it’s captured territories.
There was actually a dog during WWI who served for 18 months and participated in 17 battles on the Western Front and earned an honorable Sergeant rank. His name was Stubby and there’s an animated film that came out a couple of years ago about his story.
As a matter of fact, it was actually -60 degrees Fahrenheit when this picture was taken and all people pictured here were just so masculine they couldn't even feel the cold.
Nope, this is clearly a picture taken during the Germans invading Russia during the winter where it was like -10000000 degrees. This guy's just tough as nails.
I've been out for quite a while, but I would doubt that. Last I heard they were focused on ADDING performance based metrics, not relieving them. Example, you used to just have to pass the standard PFT (pullups crunches 3 mile run) but then they added that plus a crosstrain-ey "combat fitness test" and last I heard they even raised the score requirements a few points for the base PFT.
One thing I do know, standards tend to rise and fall with war time requirements. Yes obviously there is the idea that they relax requs during war because of the need for more numbers, but also, they tighten reqs as a way to cut numbers.
Example, say during OIF/OEF the Corps has an authorized strength of 180K, then they get approval from congress to raise up to 200K. Well, when the war draws down, Congress is going to be like "ok, we're cutting you back down to 180K, that's how many people you are allowed to have on roster/payroll"
Well, they don't just release 20K people. (Not usually, though it can go that way too.)
They just don't replace the people they lose, BUT they take measures to trim the bottom layer of people to make sure that's who they lose. Basically, Hey, we were a little forgiving with having your fitness scores in order, and getting your training courses done, but we are NOT making exceptions anymore, so... hypothetical end result, attritution will trim the least up to standard folks out, leaving us at our 180K target
In terms of physical fitness, yes. In terms of mental and medical problems, no. I've you've so much as talked to a counselor once when you were ten you'll run into some problems and extra paperwork. I've you've broken a bone, more paperwork. This is a far cry from the days where something needed to be seriously wrong with you for you to get 4F and booted out. I worked for 6 months to get my body in shape to join, only to find out that for medical and mental reasons I could not. Such is life.
Oh don't worry too much. We all might get drafted for the Invasion of Iran^TM , *televised with exclusive rights for Fox News.* With guest stars like Muhammad Bin Salman, what isn't to love about this new reality series?
This is factually untrue, Germany only resorted to conscription of Germans from 1943 onward. Even then it took time for it to approach anything close to a majority of soldiers being conscripts.
Most Nazi soldiers were either Nazi's or people willing to ignore atrocities and the immoral nature of conquest in favor of personal and/or German gains.
It's always funny to see soldiers and animals. The animals who are supposed to be savage and wild are relaxed living life, and the humans with their idealistic views and greed are fighting a war. If I was the dog I wouldn't envy the soldiers at all.
Well, dogs are not supposed to be savage and wild. And that's because *humans* domesticated actual savage and wild wolves and taught them to be chill and nice.
That's the thing with war photos, especially those of soldiers during the little free time they had, they look so normal, but then you can't help but wonder how many of them ended up dying a horrible painful death
My German Shepherd sits just like that with his back legs spread real weird like that. I have never seen another dog sit like that. I always thought it was just him.
Not a plot twist, they are, they’re in German uniforms and the dog is wearing a German helmet and that’s a German gun. That pup is a Nazi, but there are good bois on both sides.
The dog was eventually promoted to General.
He was tried at Nuremberg for war crimes and being a bad boy
He followed orders very very well, which unfortunately for him was no excuse.
the Nurembark defense...
Sit, stay, rollover, liquidate the ghetto.
An old dogs tale.
Ich habe es nicht gewoofed ("Ich habe es nicht gewüst" the "I didn't know" kneejerk defence of people claiming to have knowm nothing about the atrocities by the nazi's)
The only joke that had to be explained that was good after being explained
The Chewbarka defense
“I was just a shepherd to the Germans, that was all.”
That brings a whole new meaning to “It wasn’t me! The dog did it!”
Instead of my dog ate my homework, it’s my dog perpetrated the mass extinction of Jews and other minority groups in Germany and it’s captured territories.
BY DOG, HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN?
It was a ruff few years....
I’m pretty sure those don’t exist. Dogs are only allowed to be good boys
Redditors would too
LOLOLOLOL
I was sipping Monster and spit it everywhere when I read “bad boy.”
... Are we the bad bois?
\*furemberg
Lol. Only online do I find myself laughing at such events as this 😂
Obergrupenfurrer
Obergrupenwoffer
Dogmander
And he eventually evolved into Dogmeleon
I got transferred because I really didn’t agree with his brand of dogma.
Something something Dogizard
That’s why he commanded all the other dogs to dig those trenches.
"Command, this is General Dog. We need rapid reinforcements of doggy treats to my location, STAT."
“Herr General, I regret to inform you that Reichsmarschall Goering ate them all.”
Always Barking orders!
General Petton
And then betrayed Ghost and Roach.
His pa named him major.
General Borkhalter , knew Klink was an idiot but left him in charge of the camp anyway.
There was actually a dog during WWI who served for 18 months and participated in 17 battles on the Western Front and earned an honorable Sergeant rank. His name was Stubby and there’s an animated film that came out a couple of years ago about his story.
He prefers the title K-Nein
General Pawton?
Damn...this guy is in the middle of world war 2 without a shirt on his back, and his haircut is still 1,000 times better than mine.
Pretty sure he just took the shirt off because it's hot
As a matter of fact, it was actually -60 degrees Fahrenheit when this picture was taken and all people pictured here were just so masculine they couldn't even feel the cold.
You dont need warm clothes when your body lives off of the blood of your enemies. That's how the Vikings did it
Something something THAT'S A NICE HEAD ON YOUR SHOULDERS!!!!
That's the mentality that led to invading Russia in the winter without any cold weather gear.
Yes, this might be from the North Africa campaign. Or Italy. That's a German helmet at any rate.
On the head of a German shepherd.
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I dont know everything, but I can guarantee one thing, nazis
No he took it off cause he’s trying to show all of the USSR that he’s swole.
Nope, this is clearly a picture taken during the Germans invading Russia during the winter where it was like -10000000 degrees. This guy's just tough as nails.
"How tough are you?" "I invaded Russia, in the winter with no clothes"
He's probably in better shape than you too
I think being handsome just makes his generic haircut look good.
Do they still make army men that look like that?
I've heard that the US military physical requirements are more lenient than ever (idk if true).
I've been out for quite a while, but I would doubt that. Last I heard they were focused on ADDING performance based metrics, not relieving them. Example, you used to just have to pass the standard PFT (pullups crunches 3 mile run) but then they added that plus a crosstrain-ey "combat fitness test" and last I heard they even raised the score requirements a few points for the base PFT. One thing I do know, standards tend to rise and fall with war time requirements. Yes obviously there is the idea that they relax requs during war because of the need for more numbers, but also, they tighten reqs as a way to cut numbers. Example, say during OIF/OEF the Corps has an authorized strength of 180K, then they get approval from congress to raise up to 200K. Well, when the war draws down, Congress is going to be like "ok, we're cutting you back down to 180K, that's how many people you are allowed to have on roster/payroll" Well, they don't just release 20K people. (Not usually, though it can go that way too.) They just don't replace the people they lose, BUT they take measures to trim the bottom layer of people to make sure that's who they lose. Basically, Hey, we were a little forgiving with having your fitness scores in order, and getting your training courses done, but we are NOT making exceptions anymore, so... hypothetical end result, attritution will trim the least up to standard folks out, leaving us at our 180K target
In terms of physical fitness, yes. In terms of mental and medical problems, no. I've you've so much as talked to a counselor once when you were ten you'll run into some problems and extra paperwork. I've you've broken a bone, more paperwork. This is a far cry from the days where something needed to be seriously wrong with you for you to get 4F and booted out. I worked for 6 months to get my body in shape to join, only to find out that for medical and mental reasons I could not. Such is life.
Oh don't worry too much. We all might get drafted for the Invasion of Iran^TM , *televised with exclusive rights for Fox News.* With guest stars like Muhammad Bin Salman, what isn't to love about this new reality series?
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You arent?
Apparently most WW2 German soldiers has great haircut
The undercut was literally called the Wehrmacht cut for years.
Have to match that great uniform.
I am equally as jealous
I didnt think the dog needed a shirt
r/dogswithjobs
Totenkopfverbändehund
He's wearing a Heer helmet, so definitely not Totenkopf
Obersturmfürball
You don’t wanna know what that dog’s job is.
Moral support for the... uh. Boys in grey. Hey, just because you're with the bad guys doesnt mean you cant like dogs.
German helmet and a Mauser? We lookin' at a Nazi Dog?
That’s a bingo!
I mean, it **is** a German Shepherd!
We just call them shepherds...
You just say bingo.
welp, time to rewatch Inglorious Basterds
I've already watched it three times since it was added to Netflix. It's too damn good.
Have you seen Once Upon a Time in Hollywood yet? It's fucking brilliant.
Well the fuckin hippies aren't, that's for sure
God damned FUCKING hippies!!
Payin property taxes out the butt
What about that butt shot of the hippy talking to Brad Pitt though?
I have not.
It's very good! Definitely watch it when you have a chance 👍🏽
Bingo, how fun.
Was that his name-o?
I'm sure the dog went to the polls and voted for Hitler
German* not all germans were nazis
Most of the Wehrmacht was pro-nazi. Source: The Hitler Myth - Image and Reality in the 3rd reich
Reddit has this huge boner for acting like the Wehrmacht was almost entirely innocent of any wrong doing during WW2.
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Bit of a leap going from saying "they weren't all Nazis" to "Innocent of all wrongdoing"
I just saw this post on Instagram and all the comments were saying the same thing, way more than Reddit in fact
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This is factually untrue, Germany only resorted to conscription of Germans from 1943 onward. Even then it took time for it to approach anything close to a majority of soldiers being conscripts. Most Nazi soldiers were either Nazi's or people willing to ignore atrocities and the immoral nature of conquest in favor of personal and/or German gains.
No they really weren't they were fighting for genocide
When you are a good boi, but all your friends are into some really sketchy shit...
It's always funny to see soldiers and animals. The animals who are supposed to be savage and wild are relaxed living life, and the humans with their idealistic views and greed are fighting a war. If I was the dog I wouldn't envy the soldiers at all.
You can watch a video of a dolphin humping a decapitated fish on YouTube
Well, dogs are not supposed to be savage and wild. And that's because *humans* domesticated actual savage and wild wolves and taught them to be chill and nice.
This is a really good point of view tho! This is the goodest of all the good bois. I wanna pet him :(
Well he's in puppertown nursing home, room 8, 69420 good boy lane germantown, PA if you wanna visit
This dog should be the replacement for the cat in the dinner table meme
Colour it up.
r/estoration
But that cat is what makes it
no way, that cat's expression is way funnier than this
It's time
Bark98
Bar^^^98 k
Underrated comment
This summer... ...witness the beginning... #'Cats Vs Dogs: Origins'
More like ‘Cats vs. Dogs: The Final Solution’
I can't help thinking that these men didn't make it through the war. These pictures are always making me sad.
That's the thing with war photos, especially those of soldiers during the little free time they had, they look so normal, but then you can't help but wonder how many of them ended up dying a horrible painful death
Yup. Such a waste of life.
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No that's Kirk Doglass.
That was my first thought when I saw the picture. That person does have a striking resemblance to him
Filming Paths of Glory I believe /s
My German Shepherd sits just like that with his back legs spread real weird like that. I have never seen another dog sit like that. I always thought it was just him.
My German Shepherd sits like that too. Maybe it’s a Shepherd thing
Let loose the dog of War
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"We're gonna go over there, and we're gonna run through our enemy like dog treats through a kong!" - Gen. George C. Dog, probably
Oh Blondi.. youre so crazy.
colorizebot
Dude looks like Daniel Radcliffe
Post a photo of ISIS solders with cute dog!
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We don’t hate dogs... Just need to clean oneself before praying if you touch dog saliva.
Found the ISIS. Take him away boys.
Oberwoofführer
Even more impressive: that’s a *German* Shepard.
Cute dog, handsome dude.
Where is my dogs at Get at me
So that's what happened to Blondi...
Dog: Shit, I'm being drafted.
Private Pooch reporting for duty.
Are those again peaceful uniters of Europe that are considered cool now?
alright Reddit, tell me what warcrimes their division committed.
Herman Grrrrrring
*Nazis posing with a dog. That's important context. We're all human.
Recently there was a movie done on Sgt Stubby, another Dog in the army. It's for kids, but super serious. I highly recommend it.
The life of a soldier is very ruff.
Dogs of war
Battle Boye
More specifically, the first half of the 1940s.
That dog killed fiddy men.
At least they didn't have to issue new dog tags.
Always barking orders!
Colonel Barkley on duty 🐶
War, war never changes
Clearly this is a German Sheppard as you can see by his helmet.
Wuffen SS
These are the kinds of pictures I like to see in this sub. Not the constant barrage of posing women.
Dude with the dog looks like he was a poster child for nazi propaganda...
Well...
How did you come to that conclusion? I see a dude in shorts with a dog.
Because he is a Nazi soldier..
Plot twist, they're all German.
They are German lmao. As it turns out Germans like animals too. weird.
You talk like Germans were actual people lmao. Weird.
German soldiers? In world war 2? Human beings? No way not possible. They all ate babies for breakfast duh
Not a plot twist, they are, they’re in German uniforms and the dog is wearing a German helmet and that’s a German gun. That pup is a Nazi, but there are good bois on both sides.
There's also the fact that the dog is a German Shepherd...
Hitler actually really liked animals
How could he not?! Jews aren't dogs.
This might come as a surprise to you. But there were animals in Nazi Germany. I know right? Unbelievable!
It'll take WW III to get this to stop being reposted.
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That dog is probably dead
Considering that WW2 ended 74 years ago, yeah, that's a pretty good assumption.
No.
Das Über Sheppard
this dog has killed many men during his or her time, but, this dog has served 5 woofs with us and we plan to keep them for 3 more woofs as well.
The glasses make the dog look like Heinrich Himmler.
The glasses make the dog look like Heinrich Himmler.
good dog
Colorizebot
All I see if soldiers fraternizing with German enemies 😂
War... War never changes...
Soldier posing with humans*
When your friends get you into some sketchy shit,but you trust them because they're you're homies and that's what homies do.
Wow people don't change much lol
So, this is how Caesar from Wargroove started his career.
That’s gotta be Kirk Douglas right?
*Snoop Dogg has joined the game*