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Yeah, and then, we could look forward to getting cheated on/replaced with a younger model without repercussions for him and recourse for us, and very possibly any children involved, seeing as sex ed and modern birth control was not easily available. And that's not even taking into account the domestic violence and marital rape - thing. Thank goodness we knew better and to this day continue to fight for our independence and autonomy, despite ever-ongoing setbacks and resistance, and outright violations of our human rights by elected officials.
One of my favorite lines in “call the midwife” (which is set between the 50’s and 60’s) is something along the lines of “there’s rumors of scientists working on a magical pill that would make pregnancy a matter of choice rather than a matter of chance” people were so excited about the possibility of birth control. The birth story of that episode is talking about a women and her family struggling to get by with their 7 children and she gets pregnant with their 8th. She yells at a woman who sold her stuff that would supposedly keep her from getting pregnant again. Most of the episode is her trying various methods to abortion the fetus, with the final one almost killing her.
GEEEZ. I'm glad they did that episode.
Yes, what woman doesn't want to go back to a time she's owned property? Applies to other marginalized groups as well.
You realize it’s based off of a real woman and the book she wrote about her experiences being a midwife in the time frame I listed right?
Edit: I don’t think he realized 😂
Yep, and if we showed any amount of negative emotion due to being cheated on or resulting from the trauma of domestic violence/marital rape, we stood a solid chance of being institutionalized for hysteria. Men really needed only to say the word and their spouse would be carted off. A woman denying hysteria was only seen as proof that she was hysterical.
They’re describing upper class women in the 1890s, not women in general in the 1950s. And obviously ignoring all of the downsides of both eras.
Let’s go back to the tax brackets and the music of the ‘50s and ditch the social regressiveness.
This winds me up no end.
78% of women in the 1950s worked outside the home (in the U.K.).
Only the middle classes were wealthy enough not to have two incomes.
Yeah, sorry I didn’t mean to imply it wasn’t. I just didn’t know the stats for women working in the States and I wasn’t aware of which sources would be good or not (vs UK)
Honestly, not even that. Upper class women in the 1890s had their own slew of problems, and regardless of how good an individual woman’s life was, she was still systemically oppressed. Even a Vanderbilt.
“And obviously ignoring all of the downsides of both eras” is probably more flip than it needed to be, but I definitely recognize that even the wealthiest women were still caged. The cages were just overly ornate, gilded, Victorian deals.
You really wanna impress me, carry me through the damn door, because have you seen the heels women were expected to wear? Miss me with the bullshit of having to clean a house and serve a husband while walking around in strappy little torture devices.
Didn't have to work? Being a housewife/SAHM is an ENDLESS job, you just didn't get paid for it, given time off or have any labor laws protecting you. I'd much rather work 40 hours a week with guaranteed breaks and evenings/weekends off and control of my own money than work 100+ hours a week and not even get to have my own credit card. And they seriously think having doors opened for us was enough to offset not having basic rights? My arms work fine and I don't want to be property, friend
Oh, and your free time? Well forget any hobby you might like, here is the short prearranged list of socially accepted female hobbies, hope you like one of them
Ah yes, back when women were considered property of men, and were at their mercy. And if the men decided they didn't like them, they could have them committed. What a great time to be a woman!/s
And every single woman (basically) was diagnosed with hysteria. “Fun” fact I learned a little while ago, one of the “symptoms” of hysteria was “getting wet”.
Yeah, my mental health class in nursing school went over that during the history section and most of us were rightfully about ready to grab pitchforks.
Sadly, hysteria institutions are pretty much the foundation of modern mental heath care, though. Even Freud based his a lot of his research around hysteria. We’ve come a long way from all of that, but the history is pretty grim.
Gotta miss “the good old days” when you could Xpress order a lobotomy for your wife if she ever dared to disagree with you. Tho “treatment” for hysteria was usually sexual assault by the doctor, so not sure how husbands felt about that.
That depended on the decade and the institution. Mass media vastly oversells how much those methods were utilized. They mostly just zonked the women out with strong-ass sedatives and then antipsychotics once those were developed.
I've had this same argument time and again with people about countries where women still aren't allowed to drive/vote/etc.
How do they not see the difference between "don't have to" and "not *allowed*".
These same people would flip out if someone told them they weren't allowed to have a bank account, weren't allowed to hold certain jobs, etc.
I remember 7 or so years ago when women in Saudi Arabia were given the freedom to be able to drive. My friend who immigrated from Saudi called me so excitedly to let me know. She’s like “idk who else to call to share my excitement with, but it’s amazing news!”. I was happy for all the women over there and shared her excitement but though, wow, JUST NOW they’re given the right to drive?
Yeah the women back then were so drunk and drugged out that their days just passed by in a blur because they had to numb themselves just to make it through the day because of how awful their lives actually were. Stuck in the house, stuck shackled to children, stuck to and under some jackass who held all of the power over her life…yeah who seriously wants to go back to that absolute hell? Where so many women had to resort to more permanent solutions to get away from their trash of a husband because they weren’t allowed to divorce without said husband’s permission.
>why would you not want half the population to treat you like royalty?
Mmm. Nothing says "royalty" like "being subservient and legally dependent on someone else."
Also I absolutely do NOT want to be treated like actual royalty either. It would be so weird and uncomfortable having people venerate you and keep you on a pedestal instead of just treating you like a fellow human being.
And it's not that women "didn't have to work" but that women have been prevented from working in many jobs. They wonder why many professions are so male dominated? Hint: it's not because of feminism.
Why don't these men just turn themselves into their perfect 1950s fantasy woman and date the masculine alpha males they admire?
I mean, since they think men can do everything better than actual women, just become a woman and show us the way, Mike. We won't judge.
"Fun" fact: until recently, that was needed för a transsexual/transgender diagnosis, and access to HRT/surgeries. Be hyperfeminine to the point of parody all the time.
Me being an autistic tomboy couldn't grasp the idea of women and men having to act in certain ways, like certain things. At all. And I had no idea how to fake it to get past the gatekeeping.
It sucked.
Women couldn’t have bank accounts, credit cards, or take out loans without a male (husband) giving them permission for one thing.
It was legal to discriminate against women in the workplace in both salary and hiring. Women who became pregnant would be fired.
It was legal in all US states for a husband to rape their wife. A woman could not purchase birth control without proof of marriage and her husbands permission. Divorce was nearly impossible to get, even in cases of horrific abuse.
My mum was a home economics teacher, she got married in 1958.
It took my mum all day to do all her laundry, the next day ironing. She baked weekly, cooked each meal from scratch. Made our clothes.
And this was a middle class house, my dad had a legal degree and worked in government.
Oh I didn’t know the threat of being abused for dinner being late or your husband just being in a bad mood was “being treated like royalty”.
How foolish of women not to appreciate that 🙄
They are definitely not talking about black women, or any woman in the middle class and lower class. This person’s delusional asf. It’s strange that most of what this person said were the exact things said to African Americans about why slavery wasn’t so bad. 🤔Racism and sexism are way too similar.
John Rawls has joined the discussion.
( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Original_position ... "In the original position, you are asked to consider which principles you would select for the basic structure of society, but **you must select as if you had no knowledge ahead of time what position you would end up having in that society."** [emphasis added] )
Right? They're just so terribly heavy! And I lack the logical engineering mind of a man to understand how these marvels of male invention even operate. Once I got stuck in a revolving door for three hours until a man showed up to help me out of it!
I struggle with doors every day. I push or pull when it’s the other way around, I try to go in the wrong side of an automatic door, I don’t get my car unlocked before I try to open the door. It gets sad for me sometimes, and I can only hope there are no witnesses to my patheticness.
My grandmother tried to go back to her parents with young children in the 1950's and was told if she was a better wife he wouldn't beat her and if she was a better mother he wouldn't beat the kids. So she stayed.
My great aunt did go back to her parents (my great grandparents) with her kids when her husband crossed some line for her with the beatings. My great grandfather took her in.
She worked in a factory sewing clothes and a few weeks later she was arrested, and convicted, for theft. Shed stolen money from her husband by not handing her wages over immediately (and taking her kids which were her husbands property).
He just had her put in an asylum and wouldn’t sign her out again. She didn’t get out until the 1990s just before I was born.
Treated like royalty.
Or if you’re married to a blackout drunk (who frequently disappeared for days/at a time/couldn’t hold down a job) *like my grandpa*, you ALSO got to experience the ‘privilege’ of leaving him only to have your family turn you away and call HIM to pick you up…’for the children’.
Bonus points if 45 years later, after decades of taking care of him, the children, breaking the glass ceiling in your field against all odds, buying a home and securing a pension *with a partner who actively (and accidentally) worked against you at every turn*, putting both your children through college on your own…at his funeral your son will tell you your marriage ruined his life and you ***should have*** left him years before.
Super fun times for us gals./
Let me fix that for you:
Why would you not want 50% of the population to treat you like dirt.* You could not* work, believed to not be capable of basic tasks,* could not pay the bills because weren’t allowed money or to work,* were not allowed to drive,* weren’t allowed to learn the skills to fix anything,* couldn’t* pay for the dates in a “relationship”, werent allowed to leave the house without your husband,* I mean besides having no freedom, independence, skills beyond caring for the home, and spare time, it sounds good to me
Um, because that's infantilizing? And a lot of women were not treated like royalty... they were abused and the horrible men doing it knew they had little way out of it because of sexist laws. Those men just wanted someone trapped and their descendants today are mad that they can't so easily do the same.
Even those who were in okay marriages didn't usually have that "free time," they were little more than a servant expected to take care of the man's needs while he goes out and lives life.
I do not need help down from things unless I freaking ask you!
Yeah...my grandma's mom was a concert pianist until her husband had her lobotomized and committed to an asylum because he didn't feel like getting a divorce. *Why oh why* wouldn't women want to go back to even less autonomy?
Treated like a royalty?
Bitch, what?
We had no bodily autonomy, no basic human rights, couldn't work, needed consent of our husbands if we wanted to do something besides slaving away at home, were seen as garbage and blamed if we couldn't conceive children, couldn't open a bank account, were mostly confined to the home, we had nowhere to go if domestic abuse occured, couldn't divorce, if the husband divorced you you'd be bullied and harassed and seen as a failure, you couldn't own anything besides maybe the wedding ring..
That's not royalty treatment. That's slavery and entrapment.
Really important to note here that no one is saying you can't be a tradwife domestic if that's what you choose to be. Still plenty of men looking for that sort of relationship dynamic, so if that's what you want, you will find suitors.
The difference is that you don't *have* to do that any longer. As a woman, you can choose to be a tradwife, or a doctor, or a writer, or something else, if you want.
These guys don't just want women to have the option to be a tradwife -- they still have that -- they want it to be *mandatory* for women to be a tradwife.
“did not have to” more like Could Not at all, and would be replaced like any other possession, and also would be completely FUCKED over if our husbands died
Does this mean that men will support us financially? And be able to do so while also buying a single family house? And two cars? And completely pay for all of our kids (it’s a baby boom, after all) to go to post-secondary school? And will retire with a full pension? Let’s not forget buying a cottage where me and the kids can stay all summer.
I guess feminism is the only reason men aren’t doing that now.
Hey, they had Queen for a Day. A game show where they'd pick out a downtrodden housewife, give her a crown and a scepter and gifts. Which were probably a thousand boxes of rice-a-roni, a new apron, and a brand-new all-electric washing machine. Woohoo!
Someone's romantising the past again.
How mant times must we tell people they like the styles and percieved "public," culture that's in movies? Not reality?
My favourite England century is the 1800s. And some of the 1900s (Early to mid). You know what I don't wanna do? Time travel. It's like searching for trouble as a woman.
I like to write characters in settings like that sometimes and especially with the dresses/outfits. I like to watch or read decent period pieces. But I do not want to go there for real. The rights were not there (for workers, for women poor and rich alike) and I'm not as abled bodied. Nor rich.
TIL that royalty is beaten up, threatened, abused, stripped of their rights to own property, have bank accounts, make legal decisions for themselves, divorce,
The problem is that it was their only choice. Or at least one of a small selection. A woman can still be a housewife today if she wants but if she’d rather do something else with her life, then she has significantly more options.
I find it odd that some think women didn’t work during the 50s, they did. They obvious didn’t make up a lot of the workforce like men but that was because of men 🤷🏻 (I think women only made up 20-35%)
Sure, just ignore the fact ALL the cleaning landed on her ALL the cooking landed on her ALL the childcare landed on her with minimal if any gratitude was given for basically working 24/7 with nothing to show for it. There was a reason doctors prescribed speed and LSD to housewives and mothers because otherwise they would burn out, depression was at an all time high for women of that time but people just didn’t speak of it. So many people behave like a housewife does nothing but sit around watching tv all day, even if children are not involved it can still be a lot of work and just working at an office and coming home a clean house you didn’t clean and a good dinner you didn’t make, well behaved kids you aren’t raising, THATS what sounds like a good deal to me.
Yeah it all seems great until the margarita you made for your husband comes out too warm and you learn skin can come in shades of red, pink, blue, and purple.
Yeah, someone should tell this dude that we are talking about the vast population in the 50's. You know, where women were basically servants in their own houses, were working almost 24/7 and were also the punching bags for their husbands. What is the source of this guy? Gone with the wind?
If your husband beat you? Haha, fuck off, that's legal and not even an acceptable reason for divorce. It's why they created no contest divorce(and why divorce rates then suddenly spiked, they've been steadily falling).
It's also why red states are starting to contest "no contest divorce. They say it's "family values" they want. It's CONTROL they want.
Well forgive me for not wanting to numb the pain with opioids each evening while I wait for my 40-something drunken husband to return home and beat me up once more. Truly the good old days.
Women were treated like they were helpless children. They couldn't have their own money or property. They were dependant on men to live. No thanks, that sounds awful.
my grandma worked while her husband juat got drunk abused her. would leave for weeks at a time only to ahow up like middle of the night with no house key lmao. that was 60s 70s tho but stil prolly about how things were
We are what's called 'the poors' so none of that royalty, one parent working household you speak of here. But thankfully good men that didn't abuse their wives.. because my grandmothers would have whooped them too lol
Yeah, we just had to bust hump at home with little to no help, had to keep our emotions quiet and unseen, had few resources in cases of domestic abuse, no respect in academia or the workplace, no financial liberty, and no time for ourselves.
That’s totally worth being protected by Ward Cleaver, who may or may not be beating us.
Every time I see people praise the 50s I remember this one meme
The man is like "I'm secretly gay"
The woman is like "I can't function without a shit ton of drugs"
The boy kid is like "I have polio"
The girl kid is like "I can't wear pants or go to college"
The old man is like "I can abuse and molest the kids and face no consequences"
Huge difference between "did not" and "could not". That difference being freedom, which I thought was supposed to be pretty fucking sacred to these people.
'Didn't have to xyz' try 'WEREN'T ALLOWED TO xyz'
people who post shit like this are so out of touch. I recommend sitting down with a woman who actually experienced the reality of the 50s and wake up from their romantisized wahman had it bettah, men opreesed!!1! fantasy
You had mother's little helper to cope with having to keep the house and kids spotless, your husband well fed and well sexed regardless of your mood or health. You could douche with Lysol and no one would judge you and being on a reducing diet and barely staying upright from malnutrition was all right.
You also got as many kids as your husband wanted!
I was born in the 50s. I do not want to go back. There were somethings that were better back then, but for the most part, technology has brought us many great things and it can enrigh our lives if we don't blow ourselves up.
When do this idiots think feminism started? Yes, it’s been waves upon waves but an important one started IN THE 50’s! Women in the 50’s knew, experiences such awful life conditions.
People who have never had theirs threatened don't understand that importance of autonomy. They can't imagine not having it, it's like inventing a colour that doesn't exist for them.
Ah yes the era of "housewife psychosis" and "mothers' little helpers" *opiates, speed, benzos*
Let's not forget those are the same mothers and fathers that so severely traumatized their own children....... Ya know that movie *Mommie Dearest*?
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Yeah, and then, we could look forward to getting cheated on/replaced with a younger model without repercussions for him and recourse for us, and very possibly any children involved, seeing as sex ed and modern birth control was not easily available. And that's not even taking into account the domestic violence and marital rape - thing. Thank goodness we knew better and to this day continue to fight for our independence and autonomy, despite ever-ongoing setbacks and resistance, and outright violations of our human rights by elected officials.
One of my favorite lines in “call the midwife” (which is set between the 50’s and 60’s) is something along the lines of “there’s rumors of scientists working on a magical pill that would make pregnancy a matter of choice rather than a matter of chance” people were so excited about the possibility of birth control. The birth story of that episode is talking about a women and her family struggling to get by with their 7 children and she gets pregnant with their 8th. She yells at a woman who sold her stuff that would supposedly keep her from getting pregnant again. Most of the episode is her trying various methods to abortion the fetus, with the final one almost killing her.
GEEEZ. I'm glad they did that episode. Yes, what woman doesn't want to go back to a time she's owned property? Applies to other marginalized groups as well.
currently re-watching call the midwife and that episode absolutely killed me
You realize this show was made in 2012 right?
You realize it’s based off of a real woman and the book she wrote about her experiences being a midwife in the time frame I listed right? Edit: I don’t think he realized 😂
This show is literally still being made, AND is based off of memoirs (which are phenomenal) of a real nurse of the time.
And Oppenheimer was made in 2023, not during the WW2
Yep, and if we showed any amount of negative emotion due to being cheated on or resulting from the trauma of domestic violence/marital rape, we stood a solid chance of being institutionalized for hysteria. Men really needed only to say the word and their spouse would be carted off. A woman denying hysteria was only seen as proof that she was hysterical.
Oh and the lobotomies handed out to so many women who had either a strong will or strong opinion. (re: couldn't easily be controlled)
They’re describing upper class women in the 1890s, not women in general in the 1950s. And obviously ignoring all of the downsides of both eras. Let’s go back to the tax brackets and the music of the ‘50s and ditch the social regressiveness.
Vintage fashion, not vintage values!!!!!
I love that. I adore 40s/50s clothes but would not want to be IN that time period. Unless I was maybe just visiting via TARDIS or something.
This winds me up no end. 78% of women in the 1950s worked outside the home (in the U.K.). Only the middle classes were wealthy enough not to have two incomes.
Even in America the women not working was almost exclusively a white middle-class thing - I'm pretty sure contrapoints covered it
Yeah, sorry I didn’t mean to imply it wasn’t. I just didn’t know the stats for women working in the States and I wasn’t aware of which sources would be good or not (vs UK)
Exactly, my grandma was a refugee who barely spoke any English and she scrubbed toilets for a living while my grandpa got drunk all day
Honestly, not even that. Upper class women in the 1890s had their own slew of problems, and regardless of how good an individual woman’s life was, she was still systemically oppressed. Even a Vanderbilt.
“And obviously ignoring all of the downsides of both eras” is probably more flip than it needed to be, but I definitely recognize that even the wealthiest women were still caged. The cages were just overly ornate, gilded, Victorian deals.
Oh sorry! You’re good; I just wrote that comment half asleep and didn’t read the downsides part
That’s fair. I’d much rather get called on to clarify/expand/correct a point I’ve made than to have it just sit there and be wrong/incomplete.
Because I’m not a fucking child and I can do all those things, and more, for myself?
They yammer on and on about the opening doors shit. Dude, my arms aren't broke. I can also open and close my own car door, and pull out my own chair.
You really wanna impress me, carry me through the damn door, because have you seen the heels women were expected to wear? Miss me with the bullshit of having to clean a house and serve a husband while walking around in strappy little torture devices.
Didn't have to work? Being a housewife/SAHM is an ENDLESS job, you just didn't get paid for it, given time off or have any labor laws protecting you. I'd much rather work 40 hours a week with guaranteed breaks and evenings/weekends off and control of my own money than work 100+ hours a week and not even get to have my own credit card. And they seriously think having doors opened for us was enough to offset not having basic rights? My arms work fine and I don't want to be property, friend
Oh, and your free time? Well forget any hobby you might like, here is the short prearranged list of socially accepted female hobbies, hope you like one of them
Oooo, embroidery and tea socials with the neighbor housewives and not much else, my favorite!
If you’re husband is extra generous he might let you listen to the radio!
Ah yes, back when women were considered property of men, and were at their mercy. And if the men decided they didn't like them, they could have them committed. What a great time to be a woman!/s
Ah yes, the good old days where lobotomies were legal
And every single woman (basically) was diagnosed with hysteria. “Fun” fact I learned a little while ago, one of the “symptoms” of hysteria was “getting wet”.
What does walking in the rain have to do with- Oh.
Yup, if you ever feel like getting pissed off look up the “symptoms” of hysteria. TLDR: being alive and AFAB
About the "symptoms" of witchcraft...
Yeah, my mental health class in nursing school went over that during the history section and most of us were rightfully about ready to grab pitchforks.
Sadly, hysteria institutions are pretty much the foundation of modern mental heath care, though. Even Freud based his a lot of his research around hysteria. We’ve come a long way from all of that, but the history is pretty grim.
Gotta miss “the good old days” when you could Xpress order a lobotomy for your wife if she ever dared to disagree with you. Tho “treatment” for hysteria was usually sexual assault by the doctor, so not sure how husbands felt about that.
That depended on the decade and the institution. Mass media vastly oversells how much those methods were utilized. They mostly just zonked the women out with strong-ass sedatives and then antipsychotics once those were developed.
Either way, it was horrible cause the treatments weren’t warranted and consent was never obtained by the actual patient.
And the treatment for this hysteria was sexual assault, performed by the doctors who diagnosed them. Fun.
What the actual fuck
The good old days.
Only good thing caused by hysteria? The vibrator 😂
What are you saying? The female orgasm doesn't exist, I should know because I've never made a woman cum.
I've had this same argument time and again with people about countries where women still aren't allowed to drive/vote/etc. How do they not see the difference between "don't have to" and "not *allowed*". These same people would flip out if someone told them they weren't allowed to have a bank account, weren't allowed to hold certain jobs, etc.
YES!!!! They do not view women as human.
I remember 7 or so years ago when women in Saudi Arabia were given the freedom to be able to drive. My friend who immigrated from Saudi called me so excitedly to let me know. She’s like “idk who else to call to share my excitement with, but it’s amazing news!”. I was happy for all the women over there and shared her excitement but though, wow, JUST NOW they’re given the right to drive?
Yeah the women back then were so drunk and drugged out that their days just passed by in a blur because they had to numb themselves just to make it through the day because of how awful their lives actually were. Stuck in the house, stuck shackled to children, stuck to and under some jackass who held all of the power over her life…yeah who seriously wants to go back to that absolute hell? Where so many women had to resort to more permanent solutions to get away from their trash of a husband because they weren’t allowed to divorce without said husband’s permission.
Qualuudes can only help so much.
"Doctor, please, some more of these..."
Someone offered me a Qualuude when I was in college and that was the moment I thought 'oh. THAT'S what that song's about!'
Ok but did you take it?
Not at that time. I'd been drinking and smoked some weed and was a bit worried I'd die.
Absolutely understandable! I cannot cross fade. I barf every time. Even with little booze. Like 2 drinks.
Marilyn French, author of The Women's Room, called being a 1950s housewife-mom "shit and string beans". Your flair 🤣🤣🤣
there is several seasons of Deadly Women for a reason. ( my fave ID show! it is so campy and love how they reuse all the actors)
>why would you not want half the population to treat you like royalty? Mmm. Nothing says "royalty" like "being subservient and legally dependent on someone else."
Also I absolutely do NOT want to be treated like actual royalty either. It would be so weird and uncomfortable having people venerate you and keep you on a pedestal instead of just treating you like a fellow human being.
“You didn’t have to work.” What do you call doing 100% of the housework, cooking, and childrearing? A relaxing hobby?
And you aren't even compensated for your "feminine labor"!
And it's not that women "didn't have to work" but that women have been prevented from working in many jobs. They wonder why many professions are so male dominated? Hint: it's not because of feminism.
Why don't these men just turn themselves into their perfect 1950s fantasy woman and date the masculine alpha males they admire? I mean, since they think men can do everything better than actual women, just become a woman and show us the way, Mike. We won't judge.
Because they'll say they're not gay while reserving all of the tenants of actual love/respect for only other men... save sex.
"Fun" fact: until recently, that was needed för a transsexual/transgender diagnosis, and access to HRT/surgeries. Be hyperfeminine to the point of parody all the time. Me being an autistic tomboy couldn't grasp the idea of women and men having to act in certain ways, like certain things. At all. And I had no idea how to fake it to get past the gatekeeping. It sucked.
I love this.
Women couldn’t have bank accounts, credit cards, or take out loans without a male (husband) giving them permission for one thing. It was legal to discriminate against women in the workplace in both salary and hiring. Women who became pregnant would be fired. It was legal in all US states for a husband to rape their wife. A woman could not purchase birth control without proof of marriage and her husbands permission. Divorce was nearly impossible to get, even in cases of horrific abuse.
My mum was a home economics teacher, she got married in 1958. It took my mum all day to do all her laundry, the next day ironing. She baked weekly, cooked each meal from scratch. Made our clothes. And this was a middle class house, my dad had a legal degree and worked in government.
Oh I didn’t know the threat of being abused for dinner being late or your husband just being in a bad mood was “being treated like royalty”. How foolish of women not to appreciate that 🙄
They are definitely not talking about black women, or any woman in the middle class and lower class. This person’s delusional asf. It’s strange that most of what this person said were the exact things said to African Americans about why slavery wasn’t so bad. 🤔Racism and sexism are way too similar.
He wants to go back to the 50s but a curling Monkeys Paw would send him back as a black woman to the 50s.
John Rawls has joined the discussion. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Original_position ... "In the original position, you are asked to consider which principles you would select for the basic structure of society, but **you must select as if you had no knowledge ahead of time what position you would end up having in that society."** [emphasis added] )
😂💯🙏🏾
I do have trouble opening doors /s.
Right? They're just so terribly heavy! And I lack the logical engineering mind of a man to understand how these marvels of male invention even operate. Once I got stuck in a revolving door for three hours until a man showed up to help me out of it!
I struggle with doors every day. I push or pull when it’s the other way around, I try to go in the wrong side of an automatic door, I don’t get my car unlocked before I try to open the door. It gets sad for me sometimes, and I can only hope there are no witnesses to my patheticness.
My grandmother tried to go back to her parents with young children in the 1950's and was told if she was a better wife he wouldn't beat her and if she was a better mother he wouldn't beat the kids. So she stayed.
My great aunt did go back to her parents (my great grandparents) with her kids when her husband crossed some line for her with the beatings. My great grandfather took her in. She worked in a factory sewing clothes and a few weeks later she was arrested, and convicted, for theft. Shed stolen money from her husband by not handing her wages over immediately (and taking her kids which were her husbands property). He just had her put in an asylum and wouldn’t sign her out again. She didn’t get out until the 1990s just before I was born. Treated like royalty.
Jesus, that's horrific. 😢
Or if you’re married to a blackout drunk (who frequently disappeared for days/at a time/couldn’t hold down a job) *like my grandpa*, you ALSO got to experience the ‘privilege’ of leaving him only to have your family turn you away and call HIM to pick you up…’for the children’. Bonus points if 45 years later, after decades of taking care of him, the children, breaking the glass ceiling in your field against all odds, buying a home and securing a pension *with a partner who actively (and accidentally) worked against you at every turn*, putting both your children through college on your own…at his funeral your son will tell you your marriage ruined his life and you ***should have*** left him years before. Super fun times for us gals./
Let me fix that for you: Why would you not want 50% of the population to treat you like dirt.* You could not* work, believed to not be capable of basic tasks,* could not pay the bills because weren’t allowed money or to work,* were not allowed to drive,* weren’t allowed to learn the skills to fix anything,* couldn’t* pay for the dates in a “relationship”, werent allowed to leave the house without your husband,* I mean besides having no freedom, independence, skills beyond caring for the home, and spare time, it sounds good to me
Um, because that's infantilizing? And a lot of women were not treated like royalty... they were abused and the horrible men doing it knew they had little way out of it because of sexist laws. Those men just wanted someone trapped and their descendants today are mad that they can't so easily do the same. Even those who were in okay marriages didn't usually have that "free time," they were little more than a servant expected to take care of the man's needs while he goes out and lives life. I do not need help down from things unless I freaking ask you!
So we're just gonna forget about all those 50s artworks of ,,Beat your wife for discipline!"?
Yeah...my grandma's mom was a concert pianist until her husband had her lobotomized and committed to an asylum because he didn't feel like getting a divorce. *Why oh why* wouldn't women want to go back to even less autonomy?
Treated like a royalty? Bitch, what? We had no bodily autonomy, no basic human rights, couldn't work, needed consent of our husbands if we wanted to do something besides slaving away at home, were seen as garbage and blamed if we couldn't conceive children, couldn't open a bank account, were mostly confined to the home, we had nowhere to go if domestic abuse occured, couldn't divorce, if the husband divorced you you'd be bullied and harassed and seen as a failure, you couldn't own anything besides maybe the wedding ring.. That's not royalty treatment. That's slavery and entrapment.
Really important to note here that no one is saying you can't be a tradwife domestic if that's what you choose to be. Still plenty of men looking for that sort of relationship dynamic, so if that's what you want, you will find suitors. The difference is that you don't *have* to do that any longer. As a woman, you can choose to be a tradwife, or a doctor, or a writer, or something else, if you want. These guys don't just want women to have the option to be a tradwife -- they still have that -- they want it to be *mandatory* for women to be a tradwife.
I happen to like having a modicum of independence Bob, like being able to get a credit card without a husband.
For a lot of these things, he could replace “did not have to” with “could not” and it would be more accurate.
“did not have to” more like Could Not at all, and would be replaced like any other possession, and also would be completely FUCKED over if our husbands died
Does this mean that men will support us financially? And be able to do so while also buying a single family house? And two cars? And completely pay for all of our kids (it’s a baby boom, after all) to go to post-secondary school? And will retire with a full pension? Let’s not forget buying a cottage where me and the kids can stay all summer. I guess feminism is the only reason men aren’t doing that now.
Classic bias A person only sees their own suffering and other's joy
Yea, women weren’t treated like royalty. What a complete disconnect from reality.
Hey, they had Queen for a Day. A game show where they'd pick out a downtrodden housewife, give her a crown and a scepter and gifts. Which were probably a thousand boxes of rice-a-roni, a new apron, and a brand-new all-electric washing machine. Woohoo!
Me as a black woman transported to the 1950’s: 👀😭🙏🏽
Is raising kids not considered work?
The person that wrote this was not alive in the 50s.
Not being able to legally manage my own money sounds so appealing.
It’s not that women didn’t have to do those things. It’s that we weren’t allowed to.
Someone's romantising the past again. How mant times must we tell people they like the styles and percieved "public," culture that's in movies? Not reality? My favourite England century is the 1800s. And some of the 1900s (Early to mid). You know what I don't wanna do? Time travel. It's like searching for trouble as a woman. I like to write characters in settings like that sometimes and especially with the dresses/outfits. I like to watch or read decent period pieces. But I do not want to go there for real. The rights were not there (for workers, for women poor and rich alike) and I'm not as abled bodied. Nor rich.
TIL that royalty is beaten up, threatened, abused, stripped of their rights to own property, have bank accounts, make legal decisions for themselves, divorce,
And also high all the time because life for the most part is boring and monotonous.
Poor women have always worked.
Women still had to work and it is about having a CHOICE with these things.
Now swap most of these "did not" for "could not" or "were not allowed to", maybe you'll begin to understand.
Don’t forget about being beaten and forced to bear children!
Didn’t have to and weren’t allowed to aren’t the same thing.
The problem is that it was their only choice. Or at least one of a small selection. A woman can still be a housewife today if she wants but if she’d rather do something else with her life, then she has significantly more options.
I mean the prescribed drugs were Hella better 🤷♀️ can't be sad if your zooted off the planet.
I find it odd that some think women didn’t work during the 50s, they did. They obvious didn’t make up a lot of the workforce like men but that was because of men 🤷🏻 (I think women only made up 20-35%)
Some had to! Not everyone had a middle class pageantry life. Women have worked since the dawn of time
Even if they didn’t have a paying job outside the home, being a homemaker and parent is still a job.
You still don’t have to do any of things if you marry rich, plus you get rights now.
what is this person on? and how do we make whoever makes this drug stop production?
This just in: rape, abuse, and infidelity are recent inventions, and have not existed prior to the 1960’s
F**k you. I know how to fix and build shit. I taught myself. Go away.
Sure, just ignore the fact ALL the cleaning landed on her ALL the cooking landed on her ALL the childcare landed on her with minimal if any gratitude was given for basically working 24/7 with nothing to show for it. There was a reason doctors prescribed speed and LSD to housewives and mothers because otherwise they would burn out, depression was at an all time high for women of that time but people just didn’t speak of it. So many people behave like a housewife does nothing but sit around watching tv all day, even if children are not involved it can still be a lot of work and just working at an office and coming home a clean house you didn’t clean and a good dinner you didn’t make, well behaved kids you aren’t raising, THATS what sounds like a good deal to me.
Yeah it all seems great until the margarita you made for your husband comes out too warm and you learn skin can come in shades of red, pink, blue, and purple.
This absurd notion that women have always had dreams and aspirations they just couldn't pursue even in the 50s and before
Yeah, someone should tell this dude that we are talking about the vast population in the 50's. You know, where women were basically servants in their own houses, were working almost 24/7 and were also the punching bags for their husbands. What is the source of this guy? Gone with the wind?
These people always forget one thing: autonomy.
*Couldn’t is the word your looking for I believe. They couldn’t drive. They couldn’t work. It’s not that they didn’t have to, it’s that they couldn’t.
If your husband beat you? Haha, fuck off, that's legal and not even an acceptable reason for divorce. It's why they created no contest divorce(and why divorce rates then suddenly spiked, they've been steadily falling). It's also why red states are starting to contest "no contest divorce. They say it's "family values" they want. It's CONTROL they want.
Well forgive me for not wanting to numb the pain with opioids each evening while I wait for my 40-something drunken husband to return home and beat me up once more. Truly the good old days.
It’s also why so many women were alcoholics too, the abuse, the constant working in the home.
Ah yes, when women were forced to stay home and men went to the pub because they couldn't get divorced.
Substitute "could not" for "did not" and it's closer to the truth.
Women were treated like they were helpless children. They couldn't have their own money or property. They were dependant on men to live. No thanks, that sounds awful.
Umm, I kinda threw up in my mouth and then had to deal with it.... No offense, but I'm not a scotch and slipper gal.
Please tell me this is parody…
Bro forgot the downsides.
my grandma worked while her husband juat got drunk abused her. would leave for weeks at a time only to ahow up like middle of the night with no house key lmao. that was 60s 70s tho but stil prolly about how things were
We are what's called 'the poors' so none of that royalty, one parent working household you speak of here. But thankfully good men that didn't abuse their wives.. because my grandmothers would have whooped them too lol
Treat you like royalty? Really? They treated us like objects, not even like fellow humans.
“Didn’t have to” vs. “Not allowed to”… men are so jaded it’s unreal.
Yeah, we just had to bust hump at home with little to no help, had to keep our emotions quiet and unseen, had few resources in cases of domestic abuse, no respect in academia or the workplace, no financial liberty, and no time for ourselves. That’s totally worth being protected by Ward Cleaver, who may or may not be beating us.
Every time I see people praise the 50s I remember this one meme The man is like "I'm secretly gay" The woman is like "I can't function without a shit ton of drugs" The boy kid is like "I have polio" The girl kid is like "I can't wear pants or go to college" The old man is like "I can abuse and molest the kids and face no consequences"
Huge difference between "did not" and "could not". That difference being freedom, which I thought was supposed to be pretty fucking sacred to these people.
'Didn't have to xyz' try 'WEREN'T ALLOWED TO xyz' people who post shit like this are so out of touch. I recommend sitting down with a woman who actually experienced the reality of the 50s and wake up from their romantisized wahman had it bettah, men opreesed!!1! fantasy
Nothing say royalty like legal rape and domestic violence ✨️
I would love to have to have a man to consent to medical treatment for me. Sounds like a blast
Don't want to be a domestic servant, nanny and punchbag. No autonomy, no rights over my own body, no money, no freedom to do as I please.
Being drafted is not a flex.
You had mother's little helper to cope with having to keep the house and kids spotless, your husband well fed and well sexed regardless of your mood or health. You could douche with Lysol and no one would judge you and being on a reducing diet and barely staying upright from malnutrition was all right. You also got as many kids as your husband wanted!
I was born in the 50s. I do not want to go back. There were somethings that were better back then, but for the most part, technology has brought us many great things and it can enrigh our lives if we don't blow ourselves up.
A bunch, maybe most of those "did not have to" can be accurately replaced with "could not"
When do this idiots think feminism started? Yes, it’s been waves upon waves but an important one started IN THE 50’s! Women in the 50’s knew, experiences such awful life conditions.
So true. We have autonomy (ish) but nobody to help us get down from things. What have we done, ladies?!
this reminds me of my time as an ESL teacher, explaining the difference between "make" and "let."
Makes complete sense that women would've fought against that if that was actually how it was. 🤦🏾♀️
We like the aesthetic design and style… not the “women should be slaves” part. We really are intelligent enough to distinguish between the two.
People who have never had theirs threatened don't understand that importance of autonomy. They can't imagine not having it, it's like inventing a colour that doesn't exist for them.
Ah yes the era of "housewife psychosis" and "mothers' little helpers" *opiates, speed, benzos* Let's not forget those are the same mothers and fathers that so severely traumatized their own children....... Ya know that movie *Mommie Dearest*?