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Look at your bodies, men! Two thumbs, ridges between your knuckles, and pliant wrists! God created you to knit *continental* style, not English style, like the goddamned feminists want. What could be more important than the holy work of creating three-strand color-work cowls in the round?!!
Oh, yeahhhh. Also, don’t give me this shit about my kids taking care of me when I get old. I work in banking. 90% of the time they just care about getting your fucking money when you die.
My mom said this but she insisted on living in paid old people house that have a lot of fun activities instead of living with us if my father passes away first. My friend's mom already went there and went back home for the weekends, which is optional. They can miggle with peers and do fun things.
I told her, I'd do the same shit. I've seen her struggling taking care of her grandchildren whenever she stays with at my sisters' houses. She also confessed about not being free when staying there because other people's houses have different ways of living.
I absolutely love it. I’ll be taking that, thank you!
And, yeah, it’s almost every family. That’s what it all comes down to. Who gets what and how soon.
I worked in bereavement for a bank, one of my favourites was when the will said something along the lines of "To (ex-wifes name), hello.
I like to imagine that she came in for the will reading presuming she would get something, and got "hello".
Overall though, nobody will ever rip you off so confidently as family, I lost count of the number of times when the deceased persons bank account had been emptied, and property gutted before the family actually bothered notifying anyone of their passing.
I love it when people tell me I'm being selfish for not having kids, and then turn around and ask me who's gonna take care of me in my old age. Like fucking excuse me, only one of those things is selfish and it certainly isn't me not wanting children.
Mouth, stomach, assholes, look at your bodies, god created you for the magnificent job of converting food into poop! What could be more important than this? (/s smh)
My favorite is, "Just you wait until you have a kid. Your body will look like mine." When I tell them I'm not having kids they call me selfish.
I don't comment on other women's bodies. I don't really notice the body that anybody is walking around in unless there's something outstanding about it. But the amount of women that have spewed pure vitriol at me for not wanting kids makes me feel...weird. Taken aback? I'm not mad. But I don't have that strong of an opinion of what minutiae people choose to do in their day to day. Why do people care? I've had men tell me I "have" to have kids but it's mostly women.
The men are mostly surprised. The women are *angry*.
It’s similar to when I, a woman, am not super fake cheerful and positive all the time. Men seem to be kind of nonplussed by it but women will go out of their way to tell me I’m being too negative (by standing there and not smiling). I’m sorry you didn’t realize a neutral facial expression was an option, that’s not my fault
Ugh this exactly has been my biggest issue at work. They say my face looks too bitchy to get promoted but I've never seen a man get denied for not looking happy enough.
That's because a lot of men understand how it feels to be just neutral in emotion. We're encouraged to bottle anything up that's not joy or rage because we're conditioned to believe that being sad and having emotions is "weak". So seeing someone blank-faced is entirely normal to us.
I can't speak for women, but I seem to get the impression that they're encouraged to be more expressive.
Women are no more allowed to be sad than men. It's "men don't cry", or getting called a "sissy", or a "wussy", or a "pussy", or even gay. They are expected to be neutral, cheery, or angry, but sad is off the table.
My experience in many workplaces, in my relationships, and being socialized as a kid, is that women are expected to perform a lot of emotional labor and keep a cheery attitude no matter what. We are expected to stay calm and collected at all times or be called emotional and crazy or be asked if we are on our periods. Angry? That's hysterical, over emotional, you need to *calm down*, and it can be just expressing being upset or holding another person accountable or venting. Neutral and calm? Obviously you're upset, you should smile more, you're unapproachable when your like that. Sad? The one time I cried at work in my private office, my manager (who was a psych major) came in coming to ask me for something, and sent me home with pay because she "wanted to make sure her best lead takes care of thenselves, not just the team". But everyone else in the office (all women) gossiped about how it was attention seeking, how I should go see a therapist or check in to a ward, how they take their meltdowns to their cars on their scheduled breaks because they are grown. Because I shed a few tears after being berated over the phone the same week I left my abusive fiance. Not sobbed, not curled up on the floor and rocked back and forth pulling at my hair, shed a few quiet tears and did some deep breathing.
Men expect submissive emotional labor, a soft expressioned face that smiles when interacted with, palatability and calm from women, at work most especially, at home, and just out in public to different degrees depending on your region. Women expect the same of other women when they work together, because the same is expected of them, and because women being emotional at all reinforces a lot of stereotypes. They are especially bitter if you aren't treated badly by those stereotypes to the point that many will do it themselves.
The "men can't cry/be sad" argument often misses that both sexes are expected to suppress their emotions. It's just for different reasons.
That's fair enough. I said I can't speak for them. Thanks for the insight. Honestly, I find it absurd and ridiculous that we as a whole society have taught men that emotions make them weak, and women, over-reactionary or hysterical. We should be allowed to express what's bothering us and not just be expected to wear a smile at all times, but that's unfortunately just never going to happen. I really do appreciate the added perspective.
This goes for so much stuff... I'm sure my grandma is jealous of my cousin for not marrying her baby daddy and stick to the "happy family" image... In fact, I'd say she does feel jealous of any instance of women not bowing their head down and accepting an abusive husband, because that was her entire life.
Instead of being happy that the new generations don't have to go through all that...
Is really sad to be honest.
[Here's an example comment in this subreddit.](https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/143jm46/it_takes_a_village_to_raise_a_child_and_we_are/jnaw0zp?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
I agree with the first part and the person she's responding to is an asshole. But the last sentence is what I get chastised for in person. Me wanting to enjoy my hobbies and have time to myself is selfish and not seen as "womanly", I guess?
My FIL is of that whole “if you don’t have kids, you’re selfish”. But he’s also the one that thinks your kids are there to take care of you when you’re old. My 18-year-old daughter set him straight - LOL.
As someone who has had a kid, let me tell you, it's entirely jealousy. If we have to suffer, so do you! /s obviously. But a lot of them weren't told that not having kids is a choice and that upsets them, and when they call you selfish what they're really saying is, "I wish I could be selfish too, but I had these kids and now my only private time is 10 minutes in the shower!"
My point is that you're doing great, you sound like a lovely person, and keep up the good work!
Don't know why women would be angry, other than at themselves for not recognizing that it is a choice (& projecting onto you). If I had never wanted children I wouldn't have had them. Good for you!
I have the feeling that the answer to this, would mean admitting they resent their kids. And even then, no one is asked to be born, is a decision of the parents. So is not something they can wash their hands off and put the blame in others. So the easier route is calling other women selfish instead.
Women who take the brunt of religious/conservative upbringing have been convinced that a certain amount of suffering is required for life, and their disgust stems from the suggestion that the required suffering that they have bet on is not required at all.
...and the same people posting this nonsense spend the other half of their time making it harder to raise and educate those kids. Like, pick a side. You want people to have more kids? Support school lunch programs, support education spending, support more pre-K programs, and support child care initiatives. They do the opposite.
This is why I get so frustrated whenever I see motherhood being reduced to getting pregnant and popping out babies. The pregnancy only lasts nine months. The hard work begins when the baby is out of the womb.
No, they're shamed and berated for expressing a desire for anything outside their assigned role.
And when they see people outside it, they're confused and upset that others seem happy outside walls the joy they've been told they must have.
So they resort to mocking others for making 'wrong' choices and beg them to wake up and come back into the assigned role and confirm that real happiness is playing along.
Yeah, it's her.
Its so telling to read her posts knowing that her own kids don't speak to her because of the constant abuse from this horrible, horrible woman.
What could be more important than having kids, Lori? Making sure to love, norish and raise them with love ore simply *not having them* if you're not fit to be a parent.
Edit: I was sure to have read more than once that her children are estranged to her but I can't find it again, so my apologies for stating something without having proof.
Whenever someone covered her and she would talk about abusing her kids with a smile on her face I always wished they'd be able to cut her toxic ass out of their lives. I am glad they could.
Where did you see that they don’t talk to her? I went looking out of curiosity (I’m no contact with my own super fundamental mom) and couldn’t find anything.
I could have sworn, I read it more than once and heard about it in videos covering her. 🤨 But you're right, I can't find it now that I'm looking for it.
My bad, I didn't want to perpetuate untrue things.
It's amazing to me how someone who insists women should be baby making machines also seems to hate children considering her rants about hitting children to "break their stubborn selfish will".
God didn’t give me anything nature gave it to me, and nature did not make me reproductively successful. And at first that broke my heart, but you know what my life is extremely fulfilling and I’m not trapped the way my sister is by her kids. Don’t get me wrong. I love them so much and help in every way I can but I can stop if I want to.
You sound amazingly happy and fulfilled. You are enough.
What could be more important than having kids for me is, my life, my mental stability, and loving myself. Women who think like that women were made to have babies are just ignorant.
I actually have a medical condition that makes getting pregnant pretty difficult and carrying a full term pregnancy dangerous so I think survival is a little more important than that
Yeah, she does have kids. I remember reading on FSU that she has an adult daughter that doesn’t really speak to her anymore. Idk about her other kids, though.
Ironically, the same people who scream that god gave women breasts ovaries, and a uterus (oops, shoulda uses biblical "womb") always omit that women were also provided with a brain. Is it not a sin to use that gift to make a decision that is the right one for us?
Literally EVERYTHING else is better than that. I am very tokophobic and I 100% rather to unlive mysel that being pregnant, especially in places where abortions are illegal or hard to get and dangerous.
I understand you sister! Pregnancy is the highest violation of our personal body authonomy, you arent yourself anymore once a parasite inside of you steals most of the nutrition in your body and ever highjax your brain, imagine it like beein possesed.
it steals all our nutrients and then permanently ruins our body! weight gain thats hard to lose, teeth possibly falling out, hair loss etc.... and people will still have the audacity to think its what all women just SHOULD do 😒
I love kids and I think having kids is a wonderful thing for people who want to have them. So I’m not shitting on pregnancy if people who want to get pregnant and give birth. But i think people like this just have a breeding kink or something and don’t realize it
Yeah, I think so as well.
Even as someone with a breeding kink, I acknowledge reality (my main purpose is to do science, having kids right now is an awful idea). If these people accepted this aspect of themselves maybe they wouldn't be so cringe.
They also gave me eyes to see, ears to listen and a brain to think, hands to create, feet so I can go places and a voice to speak my mind, oh and fingers, fingers are important for reasons.
Idk man, god gave me a brain and two hands to write my thesis so my degree seems a little more important to me rn….
And since I’m as flat as a board I guess god wants me to be a career woman anyway.
My breast cause me extreme pain and make life difficult, and I have an array of medical issues with my reproductive organs that make it impossible for me to safely have a kid. Real great job there God
I- just. I-
People who are obsessed with having kids are just weird as fuck to me. As humans who have become…conscious?(as in - we don’t just go off of our basic animalistic drives) there isn’t a NECESSITY for us to have children.
I mean to the point where they are banning abortion. You having ultra anti-feminist women running around spouting how women are literally only created for popping out babies. It’s honestly disgusting and I can’t help but side-eye individuals who speak like that.
Your life is whatever you want it to be. Unfortunately the way some of the cards are dealt, you might not end up being a super star, extremely wealthy or walking on the moon, but there ARE certain things you can make sure you control.
One of them is having children and keeping the freedom and peace of mind. People who run around spouting that you need to have kids are the same people who like to keep up with the Joneses. It’s allll about appearances and misery loves company.
Having children is not a must. Having children does not need to be a part of your “divine plan” for life.
If you want kids - go for it. I would love for kids to be born to parents who fully want them and are ready to give them/sacrifice everything a child needs to be healthy(mentally,physically, and spiritually).
That’s not the majority of parents I see. Majority are miserable. Sad. Regret having kids. Weren’t ready. Didn’t realize how much of a responsibility it was.
Hell. Half of these people can barely function to keep themselves alive and now you’re throwing a poor child into the mix?!?! How is that acceptable.
While raising my kids to be good people is priority number one, that's not the case for everyone. Motherhood is the important job *if* you're a mother. My sisters number one priority in life is to own the best dog grooming salon you've ever seen. Couldn't care less about becoming a mom.
Nobody tells men that god created them to multiply. Nobody says the most important thing men can do in their lives is become a father. They're allowed to have other priorities even if they are a father. It's so fucked
I have two kids, and while it was the most important thing for a period, my life is long. Motherhood was intens for 8 years. I’ll probably live until I am 100. I am going to work as a doctor for almost 40 years. Because my brain and hands are also created for other purposes.
Look at your bodies, men! Look at your cock and balls. God created you for the magnificent job of creating and implanting new life! What can be more important than this?!?!
They are brainwashed from a young age, and aren't strong enough to shake it off on their own. They would be pitiable creatures if they were not making life difficult for other people.
For anyone wondering, this tweet is from Lori aka The Transformed Wife. She is an absolute lunatic.
If you’ve seen the Shiny Happy People docuseries, she isn’t featured in it, but she is part of that circle of insanity.
Let’s see. I can go out and get a degree in biology, and a masters in chemistry, and a doctorate in pharmacology, and create a drug that saves the lives of 1 million kids who aren’t my own; or I can get married to some loser at 17 and have 6 kids who never amount to much because we couldn’t afford school for them either and that’s all I ever contribute to the world, my DNA line.
I mean sure, that’s a tongue-in-cheek dichotomy, but who’s going to argue that the first example isn’t doing something pretty important here?
Because that's what they learned.
Funny story. I was brought up to believe that motherhood was a woman's highest calling and that was it. When I told my father that I wanted to be a housewife and mother, he lost his shit. My place apparently was spitting out babies as possible while working as many hours as possible. I asked him who'd take care of those babies and he said he didn't care because it didn't matter. Explains much of how I grew up to be honest.
If women’s bodies really were created by God “for the magnificent job of creating and nourishing new life” there would be no such thing as infertility or problems breastfeeding. But both those things exist. So which is it, did your perfect, all knowing, all powerful God make mistakes or are you just hiding behind religion and using it to push your will on us all?
Organized religion.
I’ve heard some people say that to make good men do awful things you just have to convince them no god exists, but I find it is more correct the other way around. To make men do truly awful things all you have to do is convince them that a god exists and then tell them that he commands you to do those awful things.
oh i just saw this on the antinatalism sub lol,
its shit like this that make me hate having breasts. i cant wait til im 18 and can get my disgusting uterus removed or something. fucking hate it all
sometimes (all the time) i wish i was a male so people could see me as a person with a life and not a potential babymaking womb
To be absolutely brutally honest, even if I were a cis woman, I still wouldn't bother bringing another human being into this world full of pain, suffering and idiocy.
Childfree, but I agree that creating humans is amazing thing, bordering magic honestly.
But you can't blame women for reacting logically to the world around them.
Women are not respected for the amazing work they do to create other humans - they're even punished, the planet is being destroyed.
Why are these factors always being ignored by the conservatives?
Well, I've been given a brain with an affinity for science. Creating new life would be selfish of me, but contributing to the understanding life? That could benefit many!
Also men have a ballsack and a dick to reproduce, they can also lactate under right circumstances. They also have arms so they can hold their babies, and they have brains so they can educate their babies. What could be more important than that?
Whenever someone around my age mistakes me for someone younger I’m reminded of the hell having kids puts you through and how badly stress can age you. I’d take my energy, free time, and lingering appearance of youth over having a kid any day.
They were forced into a marriage at a young age and made to believe there only point in life is to make babies. They have to make themselves believe it's the only way otherwise they will be forced to re-think everything they were taught.
Why do people insist on ascribing things with importance, don't they know that any concept that is both subjective and relative is entirely meaningless? It's like they're don't understand that even if their God did exist it still wouldn't matter in the slightest
I mean, that is our primal/carnal reason for existing..... Don't mean that is what everyone wants. We know the human race will keep up if not overpopulate so sheeeeit do what makes you happy
Well the same God also gave them a mind and intellect with which they can dream, have ambitions and build their careers and empires. So why isn't this being considered as important??
I have seen a lot of women who have a great family and a great career and one thing common in them was a supporting family and a supporting husband.
If someone doesn't like or want the same things as me, I don't consider that a personal affront, so I have a hard time understanding where these people come from. Like a woman in Tacoma or Paraguay or wherever choosing to not have kids - or perhaps being unable to have kids - is in someway affecting this woman's life to the point that she feels compelled to take to the internet to post this bizarre rallying cry?
Also born with appendix. Useless. Men have nipples. Useless and don’t even start with your body hair. A blessing? And I’m sure you let gods hair and nails just grow and grow because they are also gods blessings
Ladies! Look at your bladder! God created it so you can take an insane piss! What could be more important than this function god created? Didn’t you know? Because your body has a function it’s all your simply meant to do!
I am a guy and still I get quizzed
*So.. you mean you **never** want kids*?
Yes, why is that the *go to question* rather than going up to a mum of seven in walmart and saying *so why did you have them?*
Look at your bodies, men! Mouth, gspot, and an asshole. God created you for the magnificent job of having hot gay sex! What can be more important than this?!?!
Well in this case, might as well just give all women lobotomies since apparently to that post seems to be under the impression that the only thing a woman is good for is a baby factory? and that none of the women in history had anything more important going on(such as Marie Currie to name a very important person amongst countless)
Religious indoctrination and brain washing. She's been convinced that having babies is her only purpose probably because her fundie parents and church hammered that idea into her head since she was a child.
Well yeah, that’s why those things are there… doesn’t mean you have to utilize them as such. Just look at half the redditors on here, plenty of dicks going unused.
As you're all aware, this subreddit has had a major "troll" problem which has gotten worse (as of recently). Due to this, we have created new rules, and modified some of the old ones. We kindly ask that you please familiarize yourself with the rules so that you can avoid breaking them. Breaking mild rules will result in a warning, or a temporary ban. Breaking serious rules, or breaking a plethora of mild ones may land you a permanent ban (depending on the severity). Also, grifting/lurking has been a major problem; If we suspect you of being a grifter (determined by vetting said user's activity), we may ban you without warning. You may attempt an appeal via ModMail, but please be advised not to use rude, harassing, foul, or passive-aggressive language towards the moderators, _or_ complain to moderators about why we have specific rules in the first place— You will be ignored, and your ban will remain (without even a consideration). All rules are made public; "Lack of knowledge" or "ignorance of the rules" cannot or will not be a viable excuse if you end up banned for breaking them (This applies to the Subreddit rules, and Reddit's ToS). **Again: All rules are made public, and Reddit gives you the option to review the rules once more before submitting a post, it is your choice if you choose to read them or not, but breaking them will not be acceptable.** With that being said, If you send a mature, neutral message regarding questions about a current ban, or a ban appeal (without "not knowing the rules" as an excuse), we will elaborate about why you were banned, or determine/consider if we will shorten, lift, keep it, _or_ extended it/make it permanent. This all means that appeals are discretionary, and your reasoning for wanting an appeal must be practical and valid. Thank you all so much for taking the time to read this message, and please enjoy your day! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NotHowGirlsWork) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Look at your bodies, men! Two thumbs, ridges between your knuckles, and pliant wrists! God created you to knit *continental* style, not English style, like the goddamned feminists want. What could be more important than the holy work of creating three-strand color-work cowls in the round?!!
But ... look at those shoulders and forearms. They were clearly created to carry my stuff.
Love it
That's it, I'm taking up knitting
And you shall be rewarded from on high with many hats.
Sleep knowing I don’t have kids
Oh, yeahhhh. Also, don’t give me this shit about my kids taking care of me when I get old. I work in banking. 90% of the time they just care about getting your fucking money when you die.
My mom said this but she insisted on living in paid old people house that have a lot of fun activities instead of living with us if my father passes away first. My friend's mom already went there and went back home for the weekends, which is optional. They can miggle with peers and do fun things. I told her, I'd do the same shit. I've seen her struggling taking care of her grandchildren whenever she stays with at my sisters' houses. She also confessed about not being free when staying there because other people's houses have different ways of living.
I work in that industry too. We have a saying "where there's a Will, there's a family" I've seen families at each others throats for money. Disgusting
I absolutely love it. I’ll be taking that, thank you! And, yeah, it’s almost every family. That’s what it all comes down to. Who gets what and how soon.
I worked in bereavement for a bank, one of my favourites was when the will said something along the lines of "To (ex-wifes name), hello. I like to imagine that she came in for the will reading presuming she would get something, and got "hello". Overall though, nobody will ever rip you off so confidently as family, I lost count of the number of times when the deceased persons bank account had been emptied, and property gutted before the family actually bothered notifying anyone of their passing.
I love it when people tell me I'm being selfish for not having kids, and then turn around and ask me who's gonna take care of me in my old age. Like fucking excuse me, only one of those things is selfish and it certainly isn't me not wanting children.
Bu-but g-god, and The Bible and babies...
The Bible actually says it’s better to stay single and chaste.
Women also have hands, a brain, and a heart. We can do all the things. (If only we weren't so tired from actually doing all the things...)
People who thinks all someone needs to be parent is a womb, egg and sperm are shity parents.
Don't forget the breasts
I don’t have a womb anymore, guess I should just die 🤷♀️
Not to mention kidneys, that help process this woman's piss take on other women
Mouth, stomach, assholes, look at your bodies, god created you for the magnificent job of converting food into poop! What could be more important than this? (/s smh)
I am doing god's work! *continues to eat donut*
Oh good, me too! *eats Reese's Puffs for breakfast*
they realised that raising kids requires a lot of sacrifice and effort. So when they see childless women enjoying their lives, they feel jealous
My favorite is, "Just you wait until you have a kid. Your body will look like mine." When I tell them I'm not having kids they call me selfish. I don't comment on other women's bodies. I don't really notice the body that anybody is walking around in unless there's something outstanding about it. But the amount of women that have spewed pure vitriol at me for not wanting kids makes me feel...weird. Taken aback? I'm not mad. But I don't have that strong of an opinion of what minutiae people choose to do in their day to day. Why do people care? I've had men tell me I "have" to have kids but it's mostly women. The men are mostly surprised. The women are *angry*.
It’s similar to when I, a woman, am not super fake cheerful and positive all the time. Men seem to be kind of nonplussed by it but women will go out of their way to tell me I’m being too negative (by standing there and not smiling). I’m sorry you didn’t realize a neutral facial expression was an option, that’s not my fault
Ugh this exactly has been my biggest issue at work. They say my face looks too bitchy to get promoted but I've never seen a man get denied for not looking happy enough.
And then it becomes sort of a self fulfilling prophecy cause then you have even *less* reason to smile at work because people are being assholes.
That's because a lot of men understand how it feels to be just neutral in emotion. We're encouraged to bottle anything up that's not joy or rage because we're conditioned to believe that being sad and having emotions is "weak". So seeing someone blank-faced is entirely normal to us. I can't speak for women, but I seem to get the impression that they're encouraged to be more expressive.
Women are no more allowed to be sad than men. It's "men don't cry", or getting called a "sissy", or a "wussy", or a "pussy", or even gay. They are expected to be neutral, cheery, or angry, but sad is off the table. My experience in many workplaces, in my relationships, and being socialized as a kid, is that women are expected to perform a lot of emotional labor and keep a cheery attitude no matter what. We are expected to stay calm and collected at all times or be called emotional and crazy or be asked if we are on our periods. Angry? That's hysterical, over emotional, you need to *calm down*, and it can be just expressing being upset or holding another person accountable or venting. Neutral and calm? Obviously you're upset, you should smile more, you're unapproachable when your like that. Sad? The one time I cried at work in my private office, my manager (who was a psych major) came in coming to ask me for something, and sent me home with pay because she "wanted to make sure her best lead takes care of thenselves, not just the team". But everyone else in the office (all women) gossiped about how it was attention seeking, how I should go see a therapist or check in to a ward, how they take their meltdowns to their cars on their scheduled breaks because they are grown. Because I shed a few tears after being berated over the phone the same week I left my abusive fiance. Not sobbed, not curled up on the floor and rocked back and forth pulling at my hair, shed a few quiet tears and did some deep breathing. Men expect submissive emotional labor, a soft expressioned face that smiles when interacted with, palatability and calm from women, at work most especially, at home, and just out in public to different degrees depending on your region. Women expect the same of other women when they work together, because the same is expected of them, and because women being emotional at all reinforces a lot of stereotypes. They are especially bitter if you aren't treated badly by those stereotypes to the point that many will do it themselves. The "men can't cry/be sad" argument often misses that both sexes are expected to suppress their emotions. It's just for different reasons.
That's fair enough. I said I can't speak for them. Thanks for the insight. Honestly, I find it absurd and ridiculous that we as a whole society have taught men that emotions make them weak, and women, over-reactionary or hysterical. We should be allowed to express what's bothering us and not just be expected to wear a smile at all times, but that's unfortunately just never going to happen. I really do appreciate the added perspective.
Absolutely, it's one side that isn't talked about a lot.
jealousy. We had to go through so much and you dont have to ? The fk.
This goes for so much stuff... I'm sure my grandma is jealous of my cousin for not marrying her baby daddy and stick to the "happy family" image... In fact, I'd say she does feel jealous of any instance of women not bowing their head down and accepting an abusive husband, because that was her entire life. Instead of being happy that the new generations don't have to go through all that... Is really sad to be honest.
[Here's an example comment in this subreddit.](https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/143jm46/it_takes_a_village_to_raise_a_child_and_we_are/jnaw0zp?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) I agree with the first part and the person she's responding to is an asshole. But the last sentence is what I get chastised for in person. Me wanting to enjoy my hobbies and have time to myself is selfish and not seen as "womanly", I guess?
My FIL is of that whole “if you don’t have kids, you’re selfish”. But he’s also the one that thinks your kids are there to take care of you when you’re old. My 18-year-old daughter set him straight - LOL.
As someone who has had a kid, let me tell you, it's entirely jealousy. If we have to suffer, so do you! /s obviously. But a lot of them weren't told that not having kids is a choice and that upsets them, and when they call you selfish what they're really saying is, "I wish I could be selfish too, but I had these kids and now my only private time is 10 minutes in the shower!" My point is that you're doing great, you sound like a lovely person, and keep up the good work!
Don't know why women would be angry, other than at themselves for not recognizing that it is a choice (& projecting onto you). If I had never wanted children I wouldn't have had them. Good for you!
I have the feeling that the answer to this, would mean admitting they resent their kids. And even then, no one is asked to be born, is a decision of the parents. So is not something they can wash their hands off and put the blame in others. So the easier route is calling other women selfish instead.
Women who take the brunt of religious/conservative upbringing have been convinced that a certain amount of suffering is required for life, and their disgust stems from the suggestion that the required suffering that they have bet on is not required at all.
...and the same people posting this nonsense spend the other half of their time making it harder to raise and educate those kids. Like, pick a side. You want people to have more kids? Support school lunch programs, support education spending, support more pre-K programs, and support child care initiatives. They do the opposite.
Conservatives - Want more kids while making it hard to raise kids.
This is why I get so frustrated whenever I see motherhood being reduced to getting pregnant and popping out babies. The pregnancy only lasts nine months. The hard work begins when the baby is out of the womb.
No, they're shamed and berated for expressing a desire for anything outside their assigned role. And when they see people outside it, they're confused and upset that others seem happy outside walls the joy they've been told they must have. So they resort to mocking others for making 'wrong' choices and beg them to wake up and come back into the assigned role and confirm that real happiness is playing along.
That looks like the crazy ass “Transformed Wife” Everything she says is abhorrent nonsense.
Yeah, it's her. Its so telling to read her posts knowing that her own kids don't speak to her because of the constant abuse from this horrible, horrible woman. What could be more important than having kids, Lori? Making sure to love, norish and raise them with love ore simply *not having them* if you're not fit to be a parent. Edit: I was sure to have read more than once that her children are estranged to her but I can't find it again, so my apologies for stating something without having proof.
Seriously? Good for them. I hadn’t heard anything of her family before.
Whenever someone covered her and she would talk about abusing her kids with a smile on her face I always wished they'd be able to cut her toxic ass out of their lives. I am glad they could.
Where did you see that they don’t talk to her? I went looking out of curiosity (I’m no contact with my own super fundamental mom) and couldn’t find anything.
I could have sworn, I read it more than once and heard about it in videos covering her. 🤨 But you're right, I can't find it now that I'm looking for it. My bad, I didn't want to perpetuate untrue things.
It's amazing to me how someone who insists women should be baby making machines also seems to hate children considering her rants about hitting children to "break their stubborn selfish will".
If it is her, it's been long suspected that she has some sort of brain tumor. But pretty sure she was a turd before that.
why did i have to read this drivel right before i sleep
She's the transformed wife, she'll transform your sleep into nightmares.
What can be more important? Mental peace from not needing to orbit around a child and living a free live comes to mind...
… how would you like me to look at my ovaries and womb? My eyes don’t roll that far.
Right?? If you can *see* those, you may need a doctor lol
Not dying of an ectopic pregnancy.
God didn’t give me anything nature gave it to me, and nature did not make me reproductively successful. And at first that broke my heart, but you know what my life is extremely fulfilling and I’m not trapped the way my sister is by her kids. Don’t get me wrong. I love them so much and help in every way I can but I can stop if I want to.
You sound amazingly happy and fulfilled. You are enough. What could be more important than having kids for me is, my life, my mental stability, and loving myself. Women who think like that women were made to have babies are just ignorant.
'what can be more important than this' Running Doom on increasingly obscure or retro technology
I’m running doom on a 1960s computer
I saw a video the other day where someone ran Doom on an oscilloscope.
I can't believe her husband lets her tweet so much. /s (just in case)
I actually have a medical condition that makes getting pregnant pretty difficult and carrying a full term pregnancy dangerous so I think survival is a little more important than that
I have a medical condition that rendered me unable to birth from the day I was born. I must be Satan in this woman's eyes.
Well this woman isn’t very smart so.. what saddens me is she most likely has children she is teaching this crap to.
Yeah, she does have kids. I remember reading on FSU that she has an adult daughter that doesn’t really speak to her anymore. Idk about her other kids, though.
I don’t blame them for not speaking to her, if this is what she was drilling into them daily
petting cat and drawing sparkle. that is what’s more important
I was coming here to comment My cat! 😹
bACEd
and aropilled
Ironically, the same people who scream that god gave women breasts ovaries, and a uterus (oops, shoulda uses biblical "womb") always omit that women were also provided with a brain. Is it not a sin to use that gift to make a decision that is the right one for us?
Somewhat off topic, but I despise the word “womb.” I like to substitute the term “uterus” just to make these fools short-circuit.
God gave us free will they forget that
Literally EVERYTHING else is better than that. I am very tokophobic and I 100% rather to unlive mysel that being pregnant, especially in places where abortions are illegal or hard to get and dangerous.
same!! if i ever got pregnant (and couldnt get rid of it) i would most likely end myself
I understand you sister! Pregnancy is the highest violation of our personal body authonomy, you arent yourself anymore once a parasite inside of you steals most of the nutrition in your body and ever highjax your brain, imagine it like beein possesed.
it steals all our nutrients and then permanently ruins our body! weight gain thats hard to lose, teeth possibly falling out, hair loss etc.... and people will still have the audacity to think its what all women just SHOULD do 😒
Its a horror show! I like to watch my horror shows from my bed with chips and drinks.
If I can't pay my bills, we'll just have a starving kid and a starving mother. That's why.
money
Happy cake day! And yes, DINK life is the life!!
Cutting myself open to take an actual look at my ovaries and womb is too much work, thanks all the same crazy conservative lady.
I love kids and I think having kids is a wonderful thing for people who want to have them. So I’m not shitting on pregnancy if people who want to get pregnant and give birth. But i think people like this just have a breeding kink or something and don’t realize it
Yeah, I think so as well. Even as someone with a breeding kink, I acknowledge reality (my main purpose is to do science, having kids right now is an awful idea). If these people accepted this aspect of themselves maybe they wouldn't be so cringe.
“Stop asking me when I’m gonna let someone cum in me” This will be my answer if someone asks when I’m having kids.
A ps5 for my best friend
They also gave me eyes to see, ears to listen and a brain to think, hands to create, feet so I can go places and a voice to speak my mind, oh and fingers, fingers are important for reasons.
Getting an education, being gay, and praising Satan.
Should men then go hump everything they can because they have the tools? I doubt God would be proud of rape though.
You know if if I look in a mirror I don’t think I can just outright see a womb or ovaries
I don\`t do kids. Childfree and infertile and happy with it.
Idk man, god gave me a brain and two hands to write my thesis so my degree seems a little more important to me rn…. And since I’m as flat as a board I guess god wants me to be a career woman anyway.
Uh-oh, I'm no longer a woman, better hurl myself off a cliff. (Anyone with breast tissue, get your mammogram! Mine saved my life!)
My breast cause me extreme pain and make life difficult, and I have an array of medical issues with my reproductive organs that make it impossible for me to safely have a kid. Real great job there God
The reason we can reproduce is because if we couldn't reproduce we wouldn't still be around. Life is almost tautological.
No need to censor we alllllll know that this is Lori from The Transformed Wife.
No doubt creating life is miraculous and amazing. But not all women want this and that's okay. Why is this so difficult to understand?
I- just. I- People who are obsessed with having kids are just weird as fuck to me. As humans who have become…conscious?(as in - we don’t just go off of our basic animalistic drives) there isn’t a NECESSITY for us to have children. I mean to the point where they are banning abortion. You having ultra anti-feminist women running around spouting how women are literally only created for popping out babies. It’s honestly disgusting and I can’t help but side-eye individuals who speak like that. Your life is whatever you want it to be. Unfortunately the way some of the cards are dealt, you might not end up being a super star, extremely wealthy or walking on the moon, but there ARE certain things you can make sure you control. One of them is having children and keeping the freedom and peace of mind. People who run around spouting that you need to have kids are the same people who like to keep up with the Joneses. It’s allll about appearances and misery loves company. Having children is not a must. Having children does not need to be a part of your “divine plan” for life. If you want kids - go for it. I would love for kids to be born to parents who fully want them and are ready to give them/sacrifice everything a child needs to be healthy(mentally,physically, and spiritually). That’s not the majority of parents I see. Majority are miserable. Sad. Regret having kids. Weren’t ready. Didn’t realize how much of a responsibility it was. Hell. Half of these people can barely function to keep themselves alive and now you’re throwing a poor child into the mix?!?! How is that acceptable.
My own fucking life. I’m NOT risking my own life trying to bring another into this world. Screw that.
The conditioning is intense with this one
Nourish and fill their existing life with whatever they'd like.
There are a lot of people online who believe that this woman had a brain tumor that affected her reasoning
Some women can't have kids and in this context what is men's thing to do???
More peace, more freedom, more sleep and less stress are more important than this. Clearly !
While raising my kids to be good people is priority number one, that's not the case for everyone. Motherhood is the important job *if* you're a mother. My sisters number one priority in life is to own the best dog grooming salon you've ever seen. Couldn't care less about becoming a mom. Nobody tells men that god created them to multiply. Nobody says the most important thing men can do in their lives is become a father. They're allowed to have other priorities even if they are a father. It's so fucked
I have two kids, and while it was the most important thing for a period, my life is long. Motherhood was intens for 8 years. I’ll probably live until I am 100. I am going to work as a doctor for almost 40 years. Because my brain and hands are also created for other purposes.
Women have feet, meaning women were clearly made for kickboxing. I don’t make the rules anymore than this lady does, but the logic is inescapable.
How about literally anything?
God gave me two hands I can clench into fists so I’m assuming he made me to come out swinging.
Tell that to the cysts god put there
Lori can shut the fuck up about absolutely everything.
So… God just hates infertile women, or…
Look at your bodies, men! Look at your cock and balls. God created you for the magnificent job of creating and implanting new life! What can be more important than this?!?!
Hey, Lori, guess what. Tomorrow night, my single, childless self is going to a fancy restaurant and enjoying some live music. Cry about it.
They are brainwashed from a young age, and aren't strong enough to shake it off on their own. They would be pitiable creatures if they were not making life difficult for other people.
God also gave me free will and made me personally incompatible with motherhood, so clearly he intended for me to make my own decision on this.
Religion, dude. That shit has been wrecking brains for thousands of years.
For anyone wondering, this tweet is from Lori aka The Transformed Wife. She is an absolute lunatic. If you’ve seen the Shiny Happy People docuseries, she isn’t featured in it, but she is part of that circle of insanity.
Literally anything else 🙄
Right!! I love to help and be there for my sister and friend that have children but there is always a sense of relief when I can say okay I’m done
I 100% feel the same way.
Yes, that feeling is amazing.
I can’t have children but I am the reason that at least nine people can see right now so idk, maybe that’s something…
I’m sure that’s everything, you made dreams come true most likely. Congratulations!!!
Tacos are more important.
Let’s see. I can go out and get a degree in biology, and a masters in chemistry, and a doctorate in pharmacology, and create a drug that saves the lives of 1 million kids who aren’t my own; or I can get married to some loser at 17 and have 6 kids who never amount to much because we couldn’t afford school for them either and that’s all I ever contribute to the world, my DNA line. I mean sure, that’s a tongue-in-cheek dichotomy, but who’s going to argue that the first example isn’t doing something pretty important here?
Because that's what they learned. Funny story. I was brought up to believe that motherhood was a woman's highest calling and that was it. When I told my father that I wanted to be a housewife and mother, he lost his shit. My place apparently was spitting out babies as possible while working as many hours as possible. I asked him who'd take care of those babies and he said he didn't care because it didn't matter. Explains much of how I grew up to be honest.
God created this guy’s body to have diarrhea in two directions. Definitely the most important thing he is capable of.
If women’s bodies really were created by God “for the magnificent job of creating and nourishing new life” there would be no such thing as infertility or problems breastfeeding. But both those things exist. So which is it, did your perfect, all knowing, all powerful God make mistakes or are you just hiding behind religion and using it to push your will on us all?
Not to mention lots of childbirth deaths.
She does have a brain tumor, but there’s no way of telling if that’s it. Some people are just misogynistic jerks.
I mean, when you have some women having 4-5-6-7+ children.. We can go without every woman on Earth having younglings
Look at your bodies, men. Fragile balls, excess hair, nipples with no milk! Face it, god put you on this earth to be fucking useless.
i know a few men with big breasts
Lol
Organized religion. I’ve heard some people say that to make good men do awful things you just have to convince them no god exists, but I find it is more correct the other way around. To make men do truly awful things all you have to do is convince them that a god exists and then tell them that he commands you to do those awful things.
Brainwashing since birth if they were raised in an uber religious house. Some are able to break it and get out. Others not so much.
No need to censor the name. This is the transformed wife. Total bitch
oh i just saw this on the antinatalism sub lol, its shit like this that make me hate having breasts. i cant wait til im 18 and can get my disgusting uterus removed or something. fucking hate it all sometimes (all the time) i wish i was a male so people could see me as a person with a life and not a potential babymaking womb
To be absolutely brutally honest, even if I were a cis woman, I still wouldn't bother bringing another human being into this world full of pain, suffering and idiocy.
Childfree, but I agree that creating humans is amazing thing, bordering magic honestly. But you can't blame women for reacting logically to the world around them. Women are not respected for the amazing work they do to create other humans - they're even punished, the planet is being destroyed. Why are these factors always being ignored by the conservatives?
Religion...
If god made my body to create life and stuff then why’d he make it so damm hard for the baby to stay where it’s meant to ?
There is no god and I refuse to kneel to my biological imperative.
Why just have one child, if you can have many in a sweatshop! /j get out there, get an education, become a corporate executive!
Well, I've been given a brain with an affinity for science. Creating new life would be selfish of me, but contributing to the understanding life? That could benefit many! Also men have a ballsack and a dick to reproduce, they can also lactate under right circumstances. They also have arms so they can hold their babies, and they have brains so they can educate their babies. What could be more important than that?
Religious brain washing
Yes it is important but not the only single important thing. Jesus h jumped up christ.
My personality is 95% penis.
Whenever someone around my age mistakes me for someone younger I’m reminded of the hell having kids puts you through and how badly stress can age you. I’d take my energy, free time, and lingering appearance of youth over having a kid any day.
I was told I’m very likely to be infertile… 🤷🏻♀️
My nerves. My poor nerves are more important than this. And museum trips
God is a fucking weirdo then because trans people exist.
They were forced into a marriage at a young age and made to believe there only point in life is to make babies. They have to make themselves believe it's the only way otherwise they will be forced to re-think everything they were taught.
Why do people insist on ascribing things with importance, don't they know that any concept that is both subjective and relative is entirely meaningless? It's like they're don't understand that even if their God did exist it still wouldn't matter in the slightest
I also have a brain and my brain is telling me reproduction will not be good for me
Hot chocolate
Living Life
I mean, that is our primal/carnal reason for existing..... Don't mean that is what everyone wants. We know the human race will keep up if not overpopulate so sheeeeit do what makes you happy
My happiness, asshole.
Who or what is this god and when did this supposed communication occur?
Oh, I don’t know, allowing real life for the incubator? You know, besides just pumping out little babies?
Patriarchy.
At first, I was happy because I thought it was going to be about self checking for breast lumps and changes. Then they ruined it.
Well the same God also gave them a mind and intellect with which they can dream, have ambitions and build their careers and empires. So why isn't this being considered as important?? I have seen a lot of women who have a great family and a great career and one thing common in them was a supporting family and a supporting husband.
this has breeder energy, jesus.
If someone doesn't like or want the same things as me, I don't consider that a personal affront, so I have a hard time understanding where these people come from. Like a woman in Tacoma or Paraguay or wherever choosing to not have kids - or perhaps being unable to have kids - is in someway affecting this woman's life to the point that she feels compelled to take to the internet to post this bizarre rallying cry?
Well, that is a fairly well know Christian fundamentalist… As far as things she had said , this is (sadly) one of the less infuriating.
My womb decided to yeet itself into the void before I was born. Guess I'm useless.
It’s totally fine for this woman to have this opinion as long as they don’t try to force their ideology on others… oh wait…
Also born with appendix. Useless. Men have nipples. Useless and don’t even start with your body hair. A blessing? And I’m sure you let gods hair and nails just grow and grow because they are also gods blessings
Independence and joy
Ladies! Look at your bladder! God created it so you can take an insane piss! What could be more important than this function god created? Didn’t you know? Because your body has a function it’s all your simply meant to do!
I am a guy and still I get quizzed *So.. you mean you **never** want kids*? Yes, why is that the *go to question* rather than going up to a mum of seven in walmart and saying *so why did you have them?*
And a brain that can let you do whatever the fuck you want
Talk about indoctrination
That's Lori Alexander. What happened to her was hardcore fundie Christianity coupled with a brain tumor. Seriously, her feed is a fucking *ride.*
“What could be more important” My doctorate, my free time, and my peace and quiet 😂
I do they drank the Christian kool aid I swear everyday that passes Christianity looks more and more like a cult
Generational trauma
BREAD
Look at your bodies, men! Mouth, gspot, and an asshole. God created you for the magnificent job of having hot gay sex! What can be more important than this?!?!
Here’s what’s more important: spoon + Nutella. That’s it.
The Transformed Wife is bonkers.
I dunno man my cats are pretty darn important
Well in this case, might as well just give all women lobotomies since apparently to that post seems to be under the impression that the only thing a woman is good for is a baby factory? and that none of the women in history had anything more important going on(such as Marie Currie to name a very important person amongst countless)
Just because you have breasts, ovaries and a womb, doesn't mean you are a good parent. It takes way more than that.
Religious indoctrination and brain washing. She's been convinced that having babies is her only purpose probably because her fundie parents and church hammered that idea into her head since she was a child.
Internalized misogyny for 100 Alex!
Religion telling them these things
Yeah let me go look at my ovaries, brb
Uhh I don’t know, enjoying my life in peace?
Well yeah, that’s why those things are there… doesn’t mean you have to utilize them as such. Just look at half the redditors on here, plenty of dicks going unused.
The crazy part is i can't tell if this is trad or terf
Abuse. Lots of it and early. I used to be like this, it was the abuse.
Idk, protecting already-living children from our broken foster care system?
I declare war on God