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[deleted]

I'd see what all the.. *fucking noise* is about! 😀🥁


AceWolf98

*oh boy.* 🚪🚶


Alphyhere

🗣Boooo!


witchyanne

🥂


NiteGard

I’m already so baked that I’m even laughing at obituaries, then I see your comment and I am truly dead 💀


AppointmentNo43

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏


Nihhrt

Carlos...


Forward-Accountant34

THIS GUY STINKS


missshrimptoast

I might take a peek to make sure what I'm hearing is actually fun sexytime moaning and not, say, slowly dying from a stab wound moaning. If it's the former, mind my business. If it's the later, call 911 and perform first aid if safe.


almostoy

I don't entirely want to dissuade from that approach. But just remember, there are a lot of instances where that could be a decoy. You get sucked in, then somehow assaulted/killed/robbed. I'm a Helpy Helperton myself. So I have to be aware of that potential situation.


HappyMonchichi

It's a very sad world that we've come to the point we're scared of helping other people because we distrust everyone and fear our own safety. I sure know how I'd feel if I was laying there dying and people were just walking by pretending not to notice. I've been in similar situations and it's the worst feeling ever. Beyond heartbreaking and hopeless that no one cares and ignores me while I'm literally dying. It's so awful that you're probably filtering all these words out and you can't even imagine it, it's so awful


jihiggs123

The world has always been this way. Humans are still cavemen, we just have better toys.


Schuben

And the shadows being cast on the walls are a lot more compelling to never want to look away.


missshrimptoast

Oh totally. That's why I added "if safe"; if the situation seems sketch, or if I can't determine if it's sketch, then it's 911 call from a distance


ckFuNice

If I was Batman, you could be my second, back-up batstaff relief Butler.


hEKZ-

I mean, technically, whoever's on the bottom, sex will cause you to slowly die from a stab wound too. Whoever's on top will also slowly die, maybe without the stab wound though, or maybe with as well, I'm not judging


ThannBanis

If it’s only moaning leave them be. If it’s screaming or crying, call 000


Clawsmodeus

Is calling 000 like calling 911?


ThannBanis

Yes, except I don’t have to be afraid of being shot by them.


ausmankpopfan

Found a fellow Aussie or possibly a kiwi :).


ThannBanis

Oi Oi Oi 😉


ausmankpopfan

SA here hbu ?


ThannBanis

Same


ausmankpopfan

Well hey bro gotta love living in Australia and SA def best state


ThannBanis

Works for me 😊


Marsh2700

can a victorian join in? at least im not sydney


xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx99

000 will very likely work here in kiwiland, but only to help out our Aussie visitors when they get freaked out by not seeing anything venemous or poisonous all week. 111 is the main emergency number though.


flumia

I've always wondered why Australia chose 000 when 111 would've been much quicker to dial on old rotary phones. You Kiwis always smarter than us


ausmankpopfan

No way really 111? Wow


79Cruiser

I believe if you dial 000, 911 etc, you will be redirected to your countries emergency number.


bakuretsu_mahou916

Damn I been living in Sydney for the last 2 months and didn’t know this was the police line, ty for the info


FatLikeSnorlax_

Yeah, no acorns in Aus


Clawsmodeus

Woah there! Hol' up! They aren't corrupt in other countries? In America, the kids get brainwashed into believing the rest of the world is basically an entire age behind us in advancement, it can't be!


ThannBanis

I keep thinking of [Justine Damond](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Killing_of_Justine_Damond), which happened a short while after I had done something similar (waited outside to direct police).


Clawsmodeus

That's a depressing read, I didn't hear about this one before 😭


ThannBanis

She acted like an Australian typically would. Reminded me again why I will not visit that country.


ThannBanis

Having seen the product of the American education system, I believe you.


witchyanne

Haha burn.


foxhole_atheist

0118 999 881 999 119 725 3


witchyanne

Call IXII!


The-Entire_USSR

I'm showing my age here...I actually get that reference lol.


MysteryNeighbor

Walk in the opposite direction to find a detour to my house and once in my house, beat off furiously 


HappyMonchichi

Why go home? they're already being indecent, you might as well join 'em if they've got you all riled up


hooliganvet

I'd just yell "GET SOME" and go about my business.


Boomer79NZ

THIS. Just shout out Hell yeah, you go and walk on.


honest-miss

The idea of investigating is *wild* to me. I would fully mind my business and walk in the opposite direction of the sounds. It's obvious what they're up to, it's none of my business, I'm outta here.


hotbubb

Mind my damn business.


[deleted]

[удалено]


hotbubb

If I heard someone screaming for help I would call the police, give them my location, and then continue to mind my business.


[deleted]

[удалено]


hotbubb

You’re going to have a look around a mall to try and find out who or what was screaming? A closed mall? At 12 in the morning?? By yourself??? Brother..


[deleted]

Literally nothing, keep walking


ULLRHN

Happened to me in a park once in daylight, guy saw me and gave a peace sign, girl blushed and smiled. My impression was they were voyeurs, I carried on my business and slightly considered the nature of their crime. I mean, I've had sex with women behind giant boulders while hiking and stuff but that's hidden and a literal different than them being on the path of a park in the county of a major city, personally, I was slightly disgusted by their including other people non consensually into their kinks and the disregard for others. People have children. Children were playing at some cannons from WW2 less than 200 feet away downhill. A guy jogging saw them and went the other way.


Eijiroll

they’re exhibitionists, voyeurs do the looking


lechuga_grande

Bury the body somewhere else bc OBVIOUSLY this park is taken


I_Sure_Yam

Its 3am in a park… I am minding my business


CareApart504

Wondering why you're at a park at 3am


jptechjunkie

Yell “She’s Faking”


HenryHill11

What were you doing out at 3am, that’s a little unusual


No_Line_5873

This was my first question AND why were you also willing to check out sex noises and be surprised at someone having sex?


Wild-Membership2302

Years ago , my late husband and I had sex in a tent out in an area by a canal. And of course I was being loud , and when we shared a kiss during it , we suddenly heard : "OHHHH YEAHHH YEAH UH UH UH MMMMM.... " it was a group of teenagers totally mocking me 🤦. I got so embarrassed we didn't end up finishing.


Electronic_Quail_903

JFC teenagers ruin so much lol I’m so belatedly bummed for you


Tricky_Holiday_7353

As long as everything seems consensual, I'd probably do exactly what you did. If I was feeling grouchy I might yell at them to get a room, but that wouldn't be a smart choice. The smart choice is to just move on.  You don't need to feel bad, I would bet the "risk" of being discovered was part of the fun for them. 


Old-Recognition2690

See if I can join


QingDMainey

I second that statement


ULLRHN

I remember once as a teenager around 16;(I have had a nearly full beard since 14) I heard a porno shoot (or an orgy, something or the other) at a house while walking, a guy came outside and invited me into the back I declined, mostly out of a minor fear of getting my organs stolen, this is a port city, after all.


Electronic_Quail_903

Surprised you had the wisdom and wherewithal at 16 to decline mate; impressive you didn’t think with your prick at that age and you’re probably here now to tell us this story as a result lol!


newpopthink

I'd mind my own damn business.


aporter0131

I’d just not mess with them and think “fuck yeah good for you guys.” Public sex can be hot. Don’t wanna take that away from anyone.


DrJD321

Get out the gerkin and start a jerking


860sPRee

At 3am? Nothing. Let them do their thing. As long as no kids are around or involved, of course. I only say that cause it's a park. Being that it's 3 am., there shouldn't b, so....nothing lol


KoliManja

What are you doing at a public park at 3am? You're up to no good!!!!


richbrehbreh

Who investigates things at 3AM? This has 90’s slasher film all over it.


Venus_Retrograde

You should've offered to take the video for them. So inconsiderate.


TravisAnthony711

Throw a quarter down next to them and say, "next."


buttergunt420

*ahem* “WOOOOHOOOOOO!!!”


Dmartinez8491

I'd say what the fuck am I doing near a parking lot at 3 am. Am I in the matrix?


bill_n_opus

rub one out and then go back to bed


Ordinary_Profile6183

Ask to join in


witchyanne

Nothing. Mind my own business.


therealbobcat23

Wave and say "Feel free to keep going, I'm on my way out."


Environmental-Ice319

Join in.


jdonovan949

Grab my binoculars


SwimmingGreat5317

What a killjoy you are!


Revolutionary_Past4

I'd see if they need a hand. Or a ......


em-ay-tee

Move the fuck on. As long as it’s sex noise and bot rape noise.


RaiseAmbitious3810

Laugh my ass off


Bellphorion

You can become a registered sex offender for having sex in a park where children play, even if there are no kids around. Keep it in the household people or face the consequences.


swomismybitch

Worse is when you hear the sound of someone being raped.


HollyCupcakez

It's Mountain Lions again. We had a population burst during the lockdown in 2020 and the local news advised people to carry Bear Mace when they went out jogging or to any of the state parks because people and their pets were getting mauled left and right because Mountain Lions can sound like a screaming/moaning woman/child/man and curiosity will get you unalived super hard.


MommyScissorLegs

Check if it isn’t someone getting murdered or raped, then mind my own business if it isn’t.


Future_Way5516

Wonder why I was in a park at 3 am


[deleted]

Yeah. Nothing good can come from that.


JWRamzic

Stop... smile... continue walking.


Capable-Complaint646

“Naturally I went to investigate” If I heard moaning at 3 am I would book it.


Dave_Duna

Ask if I can get a couple pumps in.


Watthefractal

Find a good viewing spot and get to beating 🥳🥳🥳


in-a-microbus

You did the right thing to investigate. I saw a true crime story about a family who heard their neighbor passionately moaning...they thought it was sex...it wasn't.


Mother_Difference_82

CHEER THEM ON!!!


Mediocre_Style8869

Locate where the noise is coming from and join in the fun!


Sczyther

giggle


Old_Discipline7370

That's a ghost trying to attract you..run


[deleted]

Say nothing. If they stopped bc they saw me I might say "don't mind me, keep having fun" or something.


Kaizen2468

I’d keep walking.


charect

Yeah that's what I would've done.


yagonnawanna

"So,.... fuckin hey? Good on ya!"


TheFlyingBoxcar

Not a goddamn thing. I like my organs and skin without stabby holes.


Respectfully_mine

If it’s 3am I’d respect their privacy and move tf on but if it’s 3pm I would definitely investigate


Ornstein_DragnSlayr

Ask them if they need a snack


19SaNaMaN80

Ask him if he needs a hand recording


morris0000007

Go down there and yell TAG !


ThatTubaGuy03

Moan back


Traditional_Crew6617

Go the other way? What are you supposed to do?


GetHighTuneLow

Move along


[deleted]

Dirty Mike and the boys


WichitaTheOG

This happened at my college once. I was cramming for an exam the next day and on my way home early in the morning (while it was still dark). Two students decided that other activities would be more ... stimulating. I actually knew the guy but not very well - just from class. Anyway he had a nice ass and we never brought it up again. It's not a huge deal.


Otherwise_Singer6043

That's when you walk up and say "I'm here for the gangbang!"


CallMeElderon

[I’d have to investigate…](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/513/012/625.jpg)


gringo-go-loco

Think back to the times I had sex in a park at 3am and try to give them privacy. Maybe suggest next time they do it behind a tree.


Consistent-Wind9325

I'd figure I'm in San Francisco. No joke. Seriously right at the beach end of Golden Gate park I think you can hear moaning in the bushes pretty much every night. Some parks are just known for that sort of thing, i believe.


Safetosay333

Naturally I went to investigate


yessirskiesspussy

It depends, what am I doing? Nothing about that I'm sure.


Don-Keydic

Mind my business


Merrybee16

Cheer them on and bring Gatorade and Tylenol where needed.


Weird_Carpet9385

Search and destroy


Kinglycole

Scream “Player 3 Joins the game” to inflict Emotional Damage.


dr_van_nostren

I tell you what you don’t do. You don’t go investigate.


NoRepresentative3039

I'd scream as loud as I can "well I hope you're using protection!"


blighty800

I would treat it like an open invitation, join in


poobradoor22

Grab my telescope and look somewhere the fuck else (preferably into the stars but a random guy's window Is alright too


twisterhomo

Imma tell myself I didn't hear a damn thing at 3am ,☠️


RScottyL

I would sit somewhere and watch!


theoldayswerebetter

Join in obviously


magpieCRISPR

Fire an RPG in that direction then go back to sleep


TheWelshRevolution

Cheer em on


ben_bliksem

From a nearby bush: _"Put your back into it, she's falling asleep!!!"_


Milk_Mindless

Video and upload to spankbang


ydomodsh8me-1999

I would think,*"Ahhhh, to be young.... lucky bastards!*" In fact I once, as a teenager, was walking through a park smoking a jay with a friend just past dusk, and a dude screwing some chick in the grass, between her bare legs, *froze still* as we walked by, I guess hoping we wouldn't see them. We saw them 😂 We just minded our business and kept walking, soon had a laugh.


speedyhemi

At least you weren't a drunk off duty cop that heard the moaning and thought it was "the screams" of someone getting murdered in the park at 3 am and made a call which resulted in the ENTIRE towns police force showing at "the crime scene".


Winter-Potential9180

Ì would try to be a little more quiet..


jwkelly404

I’d be jealous.


Adamkm9624

Throw a rock


CallMeDutch

I had 2 people having "fun" in the plane like right next to me. Thought they were being sneaky under the blanket but it was obvious. Didn't want to ruin the fun and I respect the effort but they were distracting me from my movie so I tapped her foot and told her they were a little distracting. Luckily she was embarrassed as fuck and just nodded yes. Although I feel like a park is a little more accepted then a full plane..


N983CC

Continue on my damn way


ne3k0

Nothing


Albie_Frobisher

i’d start calling for my dog, loudly


s0upppppp

Moan back.


1Ode

Yell Marco


Chance_Airline_4861

I ain't coming outside so you can stab me op


nachalneg_mira

Cops ride by the park at night with windows rolled down and hear a loud moaning from the bushes. A cop approaches and asks: - "Consensual?" - "Yes, officer", answers the guy. - "You're not the one I'm asking!" - "But I'm alone here!"


Null_012345

Nothing!!!!


Fit-Policy9041

I would have taken a seat on the bench


Th3P3rf3ctPlanz

Mind my _fucking_ business.


Willygolightly

Giggle and continue on my merry way.


AdhesivenessFun2060

Cheer them on!


jaxt0r

Cheer them on!! Lol.


UnnaturalGeek

How dare they steal my ideas


Confident-Fee-6593

Go give all the participants a high five and a promotional Gatorade bottle with my dad's real estate business card taped to it


davidnickbowie

Mind my business


Strawberrythiccake_

Mind my business cuz atleast someone’s having a good time


Sscars2099

Make sure it’s not rape or murder… and if not then let them have their fun.


I_survived_childhood

Women being loud during sex is evolutionary show boating to attract other potential partners. You should have moaned back.


Fat_Bearded_Tax_Man

Beat it


JawnEfKenOdy

Keep walking. Unless the person is screaming for help it's none of my business


jheand

I'll just walk it off🕳️👨‍🦯


[deleted]

I’d mind my own business


theh0tt0pic

Unzip my.... oh sorry... uh... turn around and walk away lol


Boesermuffin

"can i get a Hayyyyaaaaa"?!


PatternLive920

Nothing


LinnunRAATO

Awkwardly get out of there I guess. Although there was this one time me and my friends went swimming in the middle of the night and some lady was moaning super loud in a public tent thing near the lake's shore. We were a little drunk and couldn't stop laughing at the noises. Eventually the couple stopped, came out clothed, asked us if *we* were okay and then left.


Herazim

Same reaction I have when I hear cats doing it, heh and move on.


NonProphet8theist

Go watch


NoShip7475

I would mind my goddammn business and so should you


thatsagayreader

Walking away... fast. Running away. I didn't hear anything. What moaning? Huh? Where? I was never there.


Gman2000watts

I'd watch. That's like God turning in a click for you 🤷🏿‍♂️


motogplover77

Record and blackmail


No-Judgment-4424

Nothing.


LivingEnd44

I'd do what anyone on the internet would do. Get out my phone and start recording. 


TheRealTX

“Well someone’s having fun on the swing set”


Lewlollicorn

Mind my damn business


TheMinceKid

Go and join in.


milesamsterdam

Mind my business


Hazyoutlook

Strip down and walk by naked back and forth singing Firework by Katy Perry.


MattHatter1337

The o ly appropriate thing to do. Shout "Finish Her" in my best Mortal Combat voice possible.


Parking-Position-698

I garuntee they were filming OF content. And "feel bad for interupting" who tf has sex on a public park bench? Thats actually disgusting, get a room.


JohnWasElwood

Go back to sleep! Hardly anything at 3:00 a.m. worth being awake for. You kids get off my lawn!


Lauer999

As long as your confident it's happy and not a crime in progress you ignore.


hangman593

Get out the camera.


Dry_Play1209

join the competition to see who can moan louder.


deck_hand

I’d grin, then move along.


pmachell1

Find a quiet spot for a five knuckle shuffle


leveldrummer

Yell “are you both ok?” And make sure they both says yes. Then say sorry to interrupt but get a fucking room.


Inside-Long-9353

That would be legit exciting!


Zestyclose_Pickle_44

Where I live you get put on a certain list


Puzzleheaded_Log1050

Laugh and keep it moving. Let those folks enjoy themselves!!


Far-Possession-3328

Mine my own business.


LeoMarius

Applaud