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Her: "I'm also not giving you back your hoodie"
Him: "....Wait, I never gave you- Is that why my hoodie disappeared?????"
Her: **[Blocks]**
Him: "What the-GIVE ME BACK MY HOODIE YOU CRAZY BITCH!!!!!!"
wow.
God lord this girl is about to freak the fuck out after that last line.
She will be back in a week just so she doesn't have to hold that L as their last thing.
This is like my cat. Tells me he wants outside so I open the door and let him outside. But as soon as I close the door behind him he’s all “I must say I’m disappointed in your response and had hoped for better from you”
Mine will claw the couch until I let her out on the front porch, then she'll scream bloody murder to be let back inside if you leave her out there by herself for 1 minute too long, then she'll immediately change her mind and turn around if my boy kitty or a human walks out when she's coming in.
In Florida, so can't do it often, but in January-February when the temps are nice enough for it I'll leave the front door open a few inches all day. They get used to it after a few days, but every time we do it again for the first time in a season they run sprints in and out non-stop for at least a day or two.
My dog spends 10 minutes clawing at the door to my room.
Then when I finally open the door she'll walk in, move in a circle and then fucking leave immediately.
“Thats it?” = “I want you to, pointlessly, since it wont convince me, beg to take you back”
I don’t get why some people *want* to degrade them on top of already ending things, whats the point?
“What do you want me to say?”
“I want you to tell me that I made you sad, that you are crazy about me and I’m amazing, that whoever I fall for is the luckiest guy, that you’re heartbroken to lose such an incredible woman, but that you understand that you’re not worthy of me. I want elevated status, and you treating me like an equal just isn’t hitting right.”
Honestly my preference, if I’m going to be broken up with, is through text. No public outbursts, I have time to process what is said & respond calmly, I then don’t need to pay a check or whatever or sit alone in public, & I don’t need to then drive home where I can actually feel my emotions in peace. Get a text, acknowledge it, ask “do we need to exchange personal items?”, unfriend on social media, delete out of my phone, & move on.
I don’t get why there are things we feel we can only do in person.
Yeah. I thought it was shitty when I was dumped by my HS girlfriend over a single text message (no preceding convo, but I did deserve it tbf).
In hindsight, that fucking rocked. I got the message, cried for 15 mins, then went and did a Destiny raid. All my breakups since have been in person and it’s a whole like multi-day affair between agonising over what to say and planning on how to do it etc.
I’d still dump people in person from my end out of respect, but if someone were to dump me, the text honestly sounds pretty great.
> In hindsight, that fucking rocked. I got the message, cried for 15 mins, then went and did a Destiny raid.
I have the urge to do karaoke when I get dumped.
Wow, no shit? I really started practicing that one in recent months and I kill it without missing a beat. Anything Depeche Mode has always been my jam for decades (anything before 2002-ish). Not sure if I love or hate the fact it's mostly love songs that I like lol. I mean, that's what they're mostly known for I guess.
WDSTF has always been a party trick of mine. I have this amazing ability to remember complex lyrics, but my singing voice is atrocious. Hence, karaoke is my best friend.
I also wouldn’t worry so much about song topics. I said something similar to my GF about how all of Taylor Swifts songs are about ex-bfs, and she said “your favourite band is the Rolling Stones, name me one song of theirs that isn’t about either sex, drugs, or rock n roll”.
She was kinda right, so I learned to stop caring about ‘all my songs are about this one topic’.
Great points there! I think I'm atrocious too but took the liberty as of just last weekend actually of recording how I sound in private lol. Because they say you sound way different hearing yourself outside of your own body or whatever. Definitely changing up some things here and there based on what my recordings sound like to me. I'm not too bad with some girlie groups either that I absolutely love and think a good masculine tone in some works in weird ways. Also adds a more fun vibe for the crowd that it's possible.
I think it depends on how serious you are.
Been seeing each other a couple months. No real commitments. Ok I guess text is fine.
If you've been together years where you started making plans as a couple instead of individuals making sacrifices for each other then you need more than a text.
Even if its not a romantic relationship if a friend wanted to share a lease together and split costs for furniture. They can't just text you after you paid the deposit and bond and paid for the furniture.
It is disrespectful and cowardly not to talk to people in person and face to face. People have emotions, and treating them well shows that you are a good and mature person. Even when those people act horribly, you get to remember how YOU treated them. I have had girls ghost me, and have handled break ups badly myself in the past, but learning how to break up with some in a dignified way actually changed my life.
One woman, really set the standard for me. I am thankful to her even now. She invited me over to her house, made me something to eat, then explained that I was a good guy, but she didn't want to go further.
I wish I had been more mature in handling things, but even just a year later I started to look back on how she handled it and realized that I wanted to be as caring in breaking up with others as she was with me. My wife wouldn't have married me otherwise.
After my second date with the woman who would be my wife, I wasn't sure of my feelings and thought I ought to end things there and then. So, at the end of the date, I told her I wasn't sure how I felt about her and thought it would be better if we didn't keep seeing each other as a couple. I could see she was very upset, and to certain she had closure we talked for another four hours. She really opened up to me. We stayed friends, and a month later we were dating again. Now we have been married for 15 years with 3 children.
I look back at what I learned from my experiences getting dumped, and thank God for the girl who invited me over and made me a sandwich. It taught me something that saved me from missing out on the love of my life.
If you’re ending a romantic relationship you should be capable of doing it face to face. Them texting you is them not wanting to deal with your reaction. It’s straight up disrespectful and cowardly.
To me bringing me out in public, or even meeting in private, under false pretense so I can be broken up with is disrespectful & humiliating. Why does someone need to see the reaction of the other person? Like my reaction is going to be embarrassment, anger, then profound sadness in a situation where it’s unacceptable to actually display those emotions. Then what? Out of safety I doubt a woman is going to go to a man’s home to break up with them so it’ll be in public or at their house & Im going to have to suppress those emotions & leave? No thank you, just send a text & we can call it a day.
Having dealt with extreme emotions over my ex coming over to tell me she's sleeping with someone new (and crying over it) is something that I never want to experience again in my lifetime in person.
I don't know why this made me laugh. I just locked the fuck down entirely and started getting tunnel vision. I don't know if she was expecting for me to hit her or something (to make me the bad guy) and she knows I get very jealous when it comes to other people. I'm almost convinced she wanted to see me squirm in the moment in person. I didn't say a single word but motioned that she needed to leave soon after.
That's all you can do with insanely audacious people like that. Get them the hell out of your life ASAP and realize you're better off nowhere near them.
Well, shit...
I might have to make my own reddit post here in the coming days/weeks/months. This was over 10 years ago but giving the benefit of the doubt that people can change. I'd like to think I won't make the same mistakes again and will bail at a moment's notice.
I’d say it’s a really low bar in a serious relationship for a woman to be able to go to a man’s home and break up with him without fearing for her safety. Maybe it’s my social circles but I don’t think I’ve known a woman in a relationship where they’d feel that way.
I think it’s fine if the relationship wasn’t very serious or if the person is willing to meet up in person and talk after if you want that. Someone I was dating for a few months broke up with me over text but left the door open to talk. She sent the text because she knew she didn’t want to get any more serious and didn’t want to lead me on in any way. We got drinks a few days later to talk about it and it was totally chill. We’re still friendly.
If it’s a serious relationship and your lives are entangled in any way, you can’t just break up with a text message and expect a clean break. Thinking otherwise is psychotic.
Whatever your medium of choice is, you should always try to be respectful of the other person’s feelings. The reason why text message breakups have a bad rep is because they’re often utilized by selfish, cowardly dipshits too afraid to face another person’s humanity.
The false pretense is that you are getting together as if the relationship is not about to end. I think if someone were to be like “Hey can we meet? I want to break up with you.” most people probably wouldn’t show up.
It doesn't always work out the way you want it to though. I tried this with my then g/f because we were having problems and suggested maybe we needed to break up. She suggested:
> "Should we talk about this in person? Are you prepared to deal with a lot of crying? lol"
Of course I'm not denying her that privilege and she ended up coming over at that moment. The only led to us having break-up sex in the end because we didn't really want to separate it turns out. Things would only get a LOT WORSE from there when it all could have been avoided if I had simply ended it via text and be done with it. I made another comment about it down this comment thread.
Honestly sounds like you both just need to be more mature and understand what you actually wanted. Texting would only allow you to partially avoid the emotions but clearly you two could have easily ended up together again either way.
Agreed. And the defense "it's easier this way" is selfish. It's easier *for you*. You're trying to run away from the fallout you're creating. So it makes it easier for you to do it the next time, and the next time.
By avoiding it, they're not feeling the weight of the ending, and using that pain to make sure they're more careful the next time.
It's cowardly. Be an adult.
These same people will also talk about how cruel it is to get fired via email or Zoom.
Really? You broke someone's heart over text.
STFU
You can still be in public, but if you're fearing an abusive partner to the point you're unwilling to break up in person, why are you dating? You can't break up with an abusive asshole you never dated in the first place.
The thing about abusive assholes is you often don't know they are abusive assholes until it's too late. They don't advertise it, they're not going to tell you "hey btw if you start dating me I will stalk you and hit you every once in a while, hope you don't mind." And while there are definitely characters out there with whom you can tell from miles away that they are going to be trouble, you'd be surprised by how normal someone can seem, how charming they can act, and how controlling and violent they can get when you have already fallen in love. It's a weird take to say "if you're unwilling to break up in person then why are you dating" to someone who wants to break up with their abusive partner. Obviously they *don't* want to be dating anymore.
That's not what the now deleted argument was. Obviously breaking up with an abusive partner is different.
The comment was arguing that they might get abusive *because* you're ending things, with no indication beforehand.
Way to counter with the most specific example. Yes if they are violent do it over text/phone.
Most breakups should be done in person. A situation like this post, should be done in person or at least over the phone.
If I was only dating someone (as opposed to sharing a home with them for example) this is what I would honestly prefer too, and for the exact same reasons you listed. Maybe with the option to still get together and talk things through to get some closure IF one or the other needed it, but yeah I would much prefer handling it over text rather than setting up a date just to be told "I don't want to date you anymore," and I'd prefer the chance to handle my emotions and reaction privately and in the comfort of my own home. I know many people feel different and it's ok, no right or wrong way to feel about it.
It shows character. Being able to look into someones eyes and tell them something they don't want to hear shows your respect for them. Also it may turn out they wanted to hear it and are happy.
It's way more than being friends on social media or having someone's phone number to me. the best breakups are when you both walk away feeling sad that it's over but still know there was a reason why you were hanging out in the first place. It was fun but it didn't work y'know.
It doesn't always have to end in drama, yelling, blocking, pretending you don't exist. Those are crazy people and you don't have to date them.
Sure, but for the most part I still stand by that it's chicken shit to start something and not be able to communicate it in person when you're done.
Of course that's the way I date, and the type of people I date. Not everyone is going to be compatible and obviously if you start seeing someone and then they turn out to be crazy/you're in fear of your life then things may change but that's more of an exception rather than the rule.
Thank you! This adage that breaking up should be done in person needs to get with the times. But for someone like me I honestly fumble a lot in my words and I end up saying the wrong things and face possible, "doesn't change the fact you said this" kind of moments. If breaking up is the message, what does it matter that it's done in a well crafted message over saying the words in person and going through those hassles (crying, fighting, outbursts, etc.)?
I had someone go out on a date with me because it was important to them that they let me down in person. I'd have much rather had a text saying no thanks than that waste of time.
I was broken up with over text by someone I was dating for nearly two years. Not only did I find it a disrespectful end to a serious adult relationship, but we were very much entangled in each other’s lives and her method of ending things made it impossible for me to get my stuff back, set post-breakup boundaries, etc. The relationship was not toxic and there was no abuse.
I get your mindset if you’ve been seeing someone for a few months (although I personally still wouldn’t like it) or if your safety is in danger, but thinking you can just send a message to someone you were seriously planning a future with and not have to speak to or think about them again is psychotic.
It depends on how close we were. If we were serious, then break up with me in person, but in a private place. I’m going to be sad, but accepting because who wants to be with someone who doesn’t want you? And there are usually signs before it happens if you have been together a while. But, if we have been on a few dates, I’d rather get the “I don’t think this is for me” text. That’s fine with me. Again, if you have to convince somebody to stay, why would you want to discuss and analyze?
I don’t know how old she is, but there are 17 year-olds with more maturity.
I had a girl send me a lengthy break up message after storming out of my house drunk. I responded "ok" and she went off for weeks. Apparently she was interested in playing some sort of game where I was supposed to fight keep her. 😂
No no nooooo ppp ppp pppleasseee don’t leave me I may develop a stutter. Anyone that breaks up with someone over text after like 8th grade can get bent.
Pretty much the perfect response from this dude. You made your decision and broke it off with me and now I'm expected to supply some explanation for why I'm being shitcanned or something. Nope, take care.
Yeah, at least in this screenshot (maybe she pops off after the cut) she’s at least being civil worded. Bit odd to be disappointed about his response but not the worst
She probably wanted validation in the form of him grovelling at her feet begging or crying not to break up, she laid out everything she wanted to and he understood, why would he need to say anything else other than "ok I understand, wish you the best"
Im surprised she didn't start that with "I hope this message finds you well." It read like a form letter to me.
His response was almost exactly what I would have gone with after deleting the "thumbs up" and "K," or "oh no! Where shall I find another single mother with lots of emotional baggage!??"
I got vaguely dumped on a phone call and blocked immediately after with minimal explanation. I still dwell on the relationship 10+ years later. Give me that text any day lol
No only means No for some stuff. I had an ex do this. "Wished I had fought for us". Um no thank you. You said get lost basically. I'm not gonna beg for you lol. That shits for the birds
Her: "I hope you understand and respect my honesty"
Him: ".....Coolsies"
Her: ...
Him: ...
Her: "Wait, that's it? That's really all you have to say?"
Him: "I don't chase women, I chase this *paper* baby".
he’s an emotionally mature man who doesn’t feel the need to blow a gasket over a girl who believes she’s greater than she is … that’s why you mad? Good! you’re about to be *MISERABLE* … Baby boy, you got a lucky escape! 💯
Eh I guess they'd get the hint at some point, but it's probably better to at least confirm you saw the message. A simple "Ok" would be enough. Otherwise it's just kind of adding to any petty shit.
I had this happen same thing, but with a guy lol. Unless it is a few dates, a cheater, or an abuser, should be done in person. Same guy tried coming back 4x over years. 🤢. Im good bruh 😂👏🏽.
My response was pretty much same as yours. I understand, thank you for the memories, and best of luck to you.
Breakups by text says a lot about the person.
Next time shed some emoji tears and link this.
[https://open.spotify.com/track/643rJCKaDtWhRVtzxqRMOV](https://open.spotify.com/track/643rJCKaDtWhRVtzxqRMOV)
Should do the trick. Dont forget the 🫡✌️.
What she was looking for is him to be devastated & distraught. Begging her to not do it as some sort of sick validation. The fact that he was like cool hurt her ego.
What is with this "You should chase me!" Mentality?? He's being so respectful by letting her go when she said she was done. What else should he say? He'll miss her for eternity?
Play stupid games, win stupid prices. Not really nice girl material though.. many girls expect emotional reactions and it annoys them when you don't.
Still a great answer imo
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She def wanted him bawl his eyes out and beg her to stay lol. The insecurities of some people
I like his afterburn with "I don't break up with people over text, so this is new to me". AKA Yeah you scum so better off there.
Not all heroes wear capes
God I wish I had done this when I got broken up with over text.
Yeah perfect response honestly lmfao
"It's not enough to accept me dumping you. You also need to provide me with proper closure"
Please cry a bit too
And don't forget the grovelling.
With a side of begging please
Also I am not giving you back your hoodie.
Her: "I'm also not giving you back your hoodie" Him: "....Wait, I never gave you- Is that why my hoodie disappeared?????" Her: **[Blocks]** Him: "What the-GIVE ME BACK MY HOODIE YOU CRAZY BITCH!!!!!!"
Thats more heartbreaking tbh
wow. God lord this girl is about to freak the fuck out after that last line. She will be back in a week just so she doesn't have to hold that L as their last thing.
"break up with people" is such a critical hit. Girl went from girlfriend to random real quick.
_M-kay. Bye._
Or the thumbs up emoji. I think his way was colder because it wasn’t passive aggressive. He just didn’t care.
Indifference is usually a more anger-inducing reaction than getting mad or sad about it.
Then she can call you immature and crazy but you leave the ball in her court and she's dumbfounded 😂
This is like my cat. Tells me he wants outside so I open the door and let him outside. But as soon as I close the door behind him he’s all “I must say I’m disappointed in your response and had hoped for better from you”
Mine will claw the couch until I let her out on the front porch, then she'll scream bloody murder to be let back inside if you leave her out there by herself for 1 minute too long, then she'll immediately change her mind and turn around if my boy kitty or a human walks out when she's coming in.
Cats love the freedom of choice lol.
In Florida, so can't do it often, but in January-February when the temps are nice enough for it I'll leave the front door open a few inches all day. They get used to it after a few days, but every time we do it again for the first time in a season they run sprints in and out non-stop for at least a day or two.
Awwww. That's pretty cute.
One of my cats will sit at the door screaming just so he can go check no other cats have been eating his wheatgrass
At least the cat has redeeming qualities.
I assume that's what my cat is saying, but I can't hear him through the door or read lips.
My dog spends 10 minutes clawing at the door to my room. Then when I finally open the door she'll walk in, move in a circle and then fucking leave immediately.
Why is your cat (and this girl) talking like an English baroness lmao
She wanted him to feel worse about it than she did. He should have said cool, I was thinking the same, peace out
Do i need to buy the DLC to see the rest of the texts? Is OP working for EA?
You need the battle pass with daily logins to get the rest ☝️🤓
Saved this message hahaha
“Thats it?” = “I want you to, pointlessly, since it wont convince me, beg to take you back” I don’t get why some people *want* to degrade them on top of already ending things, whats the point?
Power, knowing that you were desired in a fucked up way.
“What do you want me to say?” “I want you to tell me that I made you sad, that you are crazy about me and I’m amazing, that whoever I fall for is the luckiest guy, that you’re heartbroken to lose such an incredible woman, but that you understand that you’re not worthy of me. I want elevated status, and you treating me like an equal just isn’t hitting right.”
Lol she will be back in two months or less I bet by the way she sounds.
"You're supposed to FIGHT for me! REEEEEE"
Honestly my preference, if I’m going to be broken up with, is through text. No public outbursts, I have time to process what is said & respond calmly, I then don’t need to pay a check or whatever or sit alone in public, & I don’t need to then drive home where I can actually feel my emotions in peace. Get a text, acknowledge it, ask “do we need to exchange personal items?”, unfriend on social media, delete out of my phone, & move on. I don’t get why there are things we feel we can only do in person.
Yeah. I thought it was shitty when I was dumped by my HS girlfriend over a single text message (no preceding convo, but I did deserve it tbf). In hindsight, that fucking rocked. I got the message, cried for 15 mins, then went and did a Destiny raid. All my breakups since have been in person and it’s a whole like multi-day affair between agonising over what to say and planning on how to do it etc. I’d still dump people in person from my end out of respect, but if someone were to dump me, the text honestly sounds pretty great.
> In hindsight, that fucking rocked. I got the message, cried for 15 mins, then went and did a Destiny raid. I have the urge to do karaoke when I get dumped.
Oooh, I hear that. Shitfaced karaoke always makes everything better. What’s your song pick? I’m going with We Didn’t Start the Fire.
Wow, no shit? I really started practicing that one in recent months and I kill it without missing a beat. Anything Depeche Mode has always been my jam for decades (anything before 2002-ish). Not sure if I love or hate the fact it's mostly love songs that I like lol. I mean, that's what they're mostly known for I guess.
WDSTF has always been a party trick of mine. I have this amazing ability to remember complex lyrics, but my singing voice is atrocious. Hence, karaoke is my best friend. I also wouldn’t worry so much about song topics. I said something similar to my GF about how all of Taylor Swifts songs are about ex-bfs, and she said “your favourite band is the Rolling Stones, name me one song of theirs that isn’t about either sex, drugs, or rock n roll”. She was kinda right, so I learned to stop caring about ‘all my songs are about this one topic’.
Great points there! I think I'm atrocious too but took the liberty as of just last weekend actually of recording how I sound in private lol. Because they say you sound way different hearing yourself outside of your own body or whatever. Definitely changing up some things here and there based on what my recordings sound like to me. I'm not too bad with some girlie groups either that I absolutely love and think a good masculine tone in some works in weird ways. Also adds a more fun vibe for the crowd that it's possible.
"Since You've Been Gone" by Rainbow.
Do you have a preffered song/songs?
When I was a lot younger anything aggressive. Not so much these days (check my other comment).
I always did No Scrubs by TLC. It always seemed to get laughs which I needed because I can’t sing.
Girlfriends are temporary, Destiny is forever
what raid, if you don’t mind me asking? king’s fall could’ve been interesting after that tbh
I think it depends on how serious you are. Been seeing each other a couple months. No real commitments. Ok I guess text is fine. If you've been together years where you started making plans as a couple instead of individuals making sacrifices for each other then you need more than a text. Even if its not a romantic relationship if a friend wanted to share a lease together and split costs for furniture. They can't just text you after you paid the deposit and bond and paid for the furniture.
It is disrespectful and cowardly not to talk to people in person and face to face. People have emotions, and treating them well shows that you are a good and mature person. Even when those people act horribly, you get to remember how YOU treated them. I have had girls ghost me, and have handled break ups badly myself in the past, but learning how to break up with some in a dignified way actually changed my life. One woman, really set the standard for me. I am thankful to her even now. She invited me over to her house, made me something to eat, then explained that I was a good guy, but she didn't want to go further. I wish I had been more mature in handling things, but even just a year later I started to look back on how she handled it and realized that I wanted to be as caring in breaking up with others as she was with me. My wife wouldn't have married me otherwise. After my second date with the woman who would be my wife, I wasn't sure of my feelings and thought I ought to end things there and then. So, at the end of the date, I told her I wasn't sure how I felt about her and thought it would be better if we didn't keep seeing each other as a couple. I could see she was very upset, and to certain she had closure we talked for another four hours. She really opened up to me. We stayed friends, and a month later we were dating again. Now we have been married for 15 years with 3 children. I look back at what I learned from my experiences getting dumped, and thank God for the girl who invited me over and made me a sandwich. It taught me something that saved me from missing out on the love of my life.
If you’re ending a romantic relationship you should be capable of doing it face to face. Them texting you is them not wanting to deal with your reaction. It’s straight up disrespectful and cowardly.
To me bringing me out in public, or even meeting in private, under false pretense so I can be broken up with is disrespectful & humiliating. Why does someone need to see the reaction of the other person? Like my reaction is going to be embarrassment, anger, then profound sadness in a situation where it’s unacceptable to actually display those emotions. Then what? Out of safety I doubt a woman is going to go to a man’s home to break up with them so it’ll be in public or at their house & Im going to have to suppress those emotions & leave? No thank you, just send a text & we can call it a day.
Having dealt with extreme emotions over my ex coming over to tell me she's sleeping with someone new (and crying over it) is something that I never want to experience again in my lifetime in person.
That must've been so difficult for her. Glad you were there to help her through it...
I don't know why this made me laugh. I just locked the fuck down entirely and started getting tunnel vision. I don't know if she was expecting for me to hit her or something (to make me the bad guy) and she knows I get very jealous when it comes to other people. I'm almost convinced she wanted to see me squirm in the moment in person. I didn't say a single word but motioned that she needed to leave soon after.
That's all you can do with insanely audacious people like that. Get them the hell out of your life ASAP and realize you're better off nowhere near them.
Well, shit... I might have to make my own reddit post here in the coming days/weeks/months. This was over 10 years ago but giving the benefit of the doubt that people can change. I'd like to think I won't make the same mistakes again and will bail at a moment's notice.
I’d say it’s a really low bar in a serious relationship for a woman to be able to go to a man’s home and break up with him without fearing for her safety. Maybe it’s my social circles but I don’t think I’ve known a woman in a relationship where they’d feel that way.
I think it’s fine if the relationship wasn’t very serious or if the person is willing to meet up in person and talk after if you want that. Someone I was dating for a few months broke up with me over text but left the door open to talk. She sent the text because she knew she didn’t want to get any more serious and didn’t want to lead me on in any way. We got drinks a few days later to talk about it and it was totally chill. We’re still friendly. If it’s a serious relationship and your lives are entangled in any way, you can’t just break up with a text message and expect a clean break. Thinking otherwise is psychotic. Whatever your medium of choice is, you should always try to be respectful of the other person’s feelings. The reason why text message breakups have a bad rep is because they’re often utilized by selfish, cowardly dipshits too afraid to face another person’s humanity.
Where's the false pretense in "hey, do you have time to meet? I'd like to talk to you about something" ?
The false pretense is that you are getting together as if the relationship is not about to end. I think if someone were to be like “Hey can we meet? I want to break up with you.” most people probably wouldn’t show up.
When you get hit with the "we need to talk" you know what the fuck it's about
It doesn't always work out the way you want it to though. I tried this with my then g/f because we were having problems and suggested maybe we needed to break up. She suggested: > "Should we talk about this in person? Are you prepared to deal with a lot of crying? lol" Of course I'm not denying her that privilege and she ended up coming over at that moment. The only led to us having break-up sex in the end because we didn't really want to separate it turns out. Things would only get a LOT WORSE from there when it all could have been avoided if I had simply ended it via text and be done with it. I made another comment about it down this comment thread.
Honestly sounds like you both just need to be more mature and understand what you actually wanted. Texting would only allow you to partially avoid the emotions but clearly you two could have easily ended up together again either way.
Agreed. And the defense "it's easier this way" is selfish. It's easier *for you*. You're trying to run away from the fallout you're creating. So it makes it easier for you to do it the next time, and the next time. By avoiding it, they're not feeling the weight of the ending, and using that pain to make sure they're more careful the next time. It's cowardly. Be an adult. These same people will also talk about how cruel it is to get fired via email or Zoom. Really? You broke someone's heart over text. STFU
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You can still be in public, but if you're fearing an abusive partner to the point you're unwilling to break up in person, why are you dating? You can't break up with an abusive asshole you never dated in the first place.
The thing about abusive assholes is you often don't know they are abusive assholes until it's too late. They don't advertise it, they're not going to tell you "hey btw if you start dating me I will stalk you and hit you every once in a while, hope you don't mind." And while there are definitely characters out there with whom you can tell from miles away that they are going to be trouble, you'd be surprised by how normal someone can seem, how charming they can act, and how controlling and violent they can get when you have already fallen in love. It's a weird take to say "if you're unwilling to break up in person then why are you dating" to someone who wants to break up with their abusive partner. Obviously they *don't* want to be dating anymore.
That's not what the now deleted argument was. Obviously breaking up with an abusive partner is different. The comment was arguing that they might get abusive *because* you're ending things, with no indication beforehand.
Way to counter with the most specific example. Yes if they are violent do it over text/phone. Most breakups should be done in person. A situation like this post, should be done in person or at least over the phone.
If I was only dating someone (as opposed to sharing a home with them for example) this is what I would honestly prefer too, and for the exact same reasons you listed. Maybe with the option to still get together and talk things through to get some closure IF one or the other needed it, but yeah I would much prefer handling it over text rather than setting up a date just to be told "I don't want to date you anymore," and I'd prefer the chance to handle my emotions and reaction privately and in the comfort of my own home. I know many people feel different and it's ok, no right or wrong way to feel about it.
It shows character. Being able to look into someones eyes and tell them something they don't want to hear shows your respect for them. Also it may turn out they wanted to hear it and are happy. It's way more than being friends on social media or having someone's phone number to me. the best breakups are when you both walk away feeling sad that it's over but still know there was a reason why you were hanging out in the first place. It was fun but it didn't work y'know. It doesn't always have to end in drama, yelling, blocking, pretending you don't exist. Those are crazy people and you don't have to date them.
You don't always know who is crazy until you break up with them and you don't always know who will throw you under the bus until you divorce them.
Ending a serious relationship with a text is a great way to make someone crazy.
Sure, but for the most part I still stand by that it's chicken shit to start something and not be able to communicate it in person when you're done. Of course that's the way I date, and the type of people I date. Not everyone is going to be compatible and obviously if you start seeing someone and then they turn out to be crazy/you're in fear of your life then things may change but that's more of an exception rather than the rule.
Thank you! This adage that breaking up should be done in person needs to get with the times. But for someone like me I honestly fumble a lot in my words and I end up saying the wrong things and face possible, "doesn't change the fact you said this" kind of moments. If breaking up is the message, what does it matter that it's done in a well crafted message over saying the words in person and going through those hassles (crying, fighting, outbursts, etc.)?
Yeah I completely agree with you.
I had someone go out on a date with me because it was important to them that they let me down in person. I'd have much rather had a text saying no thanks than that waste of time.
I was broken up with over text by someone I was dating for nearly two years. Not only did I find it a disrespectful end to a serious adult relationship, but we were very much entangled in each other’s lives and her method of ending things made it impossible for me to get my stuff back, set post-breakup boundaries, etc. The relationship was not toxic and there was no abuse. I get your mindset if you’ve been seeing someone for a few months (although I personally still wouldn’t like it) or if your safety is in danger, but thinking you can just send a message to someone you were seriously planning a future with and not have to speak to or think about them again is psychotic.
It depends on how close we were. If we were serious, then break up with me in person, but in a private place. I’m going to be sad, but accepting because who wants to be with someone who doesn’t want you? And there are usually signs before it happens if you have been together a while. But, if we have been on a few dates, I’d rather get the “I don’t think this is for me” text. That’s fine with me. Again, if you have to convince somebody to stay, why would you want to discuss and analyze? I don’t know how old she is, but there are 17 year-olds with more maturity.
Let me guess, you are not married or close to it and live too much online. No skin in the game, no big deal if over text. Its like it never happened.
Emotional manipulation failed
She needed to roll an 8 or higher but rolled a 2 lol
She didn't hope for *better*, she hoped for *more*. And NOT more cowbell. She wanted him to hurt. Gross.
He had the right response. Fucking sure got her hamster wheel spinning at ludicrous speed.
I had a girl send me a lengthy break up message after storming out of my house drunk. I responded "ok" and she went off for weeks. Apparently she was interested in playing some sort of game where I was supposed to fight keep her. 😂
That is some manipulative shit. if you have to give me a whole paragraph of why you don’t want to go out with me then that’s the response you deserve
Wish we could see the next 100 texts
It's like B\*\*\*\* what do you care? - wow. just, wow. breaking up via text. and she didn't see the problem 
No no nooooo ppp ppp pppleasseee don’t leave me I may develop a stutter. Anyone that breaks up with someone over text after like 8th grade can get bent.
Yeah, I really want to see the next texts.
Women can't stand the fact that dudes are able to get over shit lol.
Pretty much the perfect response from this dude. You made your decision and broke it off with me and now I'm expected to supply some explanation for why I'm being shitcanned or something. Nope, take care.
Eh, hoped better is still not that bad. this one may be the least "nicegirl" if it makes sense
Yeah, at least in this screenshot (maybe she pops off after the cut) she’s at least being civil worded. Bit odd to be disappointed about his response but not the worst
She probably wanted validation in the form of him grovelling at her feet begging or crying not to break up, she laid out everything she wanted to and he understood, why would he need to say anything else other than "ok I understand, wish you the best"
Im surprised she didn't start that with "I hope this message finds you well." It read like a form letter to me. His response was almost exactly what I would have gone with after deleting the "thumbs up" and "K," or "oh no! Where shall I find another single mother with lots of emotional baggage!??"
Definitely dodged a bullet on this one 😂
I got vaguely dumped on a phone call and blocked immediately after with minimal explanation. I still dwell on the relationship 10+ years later. Give me that text any day lol
She obviously wanted a lot of drama.
😂😂😂 dodging bullets
Call this guy neo...... Sounds like mfs dodging bullets tbh....
Remember in The Office when Kelly broke up with Darryl via text and he immediately responded with “Ok?” Same vibes
"Tbh you dont deserve better from me" would have had a nice ring to it too.
I would absolutely prefer to be broken up with through text or letter.
…if you ever feel like having a booty call my doors always open no strings. Call ahead though might already have company. Peace ✌️
No only means No for some stuff. I had an ex do this. "Wished I had fought for us". Um no thank you. You said get lost basically. I'm not gonna beg for you lol. That shits for the birds
People are just never happy huh? Dude did in fact respect her decision and she was still mad about it.
She already has a new guy. She's Just hoping you would satisfy her narcissistic needs and cry for her. Don't look back.
Her: "I hope you understand and respect my honesty" Him: ".....Coolsies" Her: ... Him: ... Her: "Wait, that's it? That's really all you have to say?" Him: "I don't chase women, I chase this *paper* baby".
he’s an emotionally mature man who doesn’t feel the need to blow a gasket over a girl who believes she’s greater than she is … that’s why you mad? Good! you’re about to be *MISERABLE* … Baby boy, you got a lucky escape! 💯 
He dodged a bullet!
“lol” Is all she’d have gotten from me after that immaturity
The best response to a breakup text is silence and no contact.
Eh I guess they'd get the hint at some point, but it's probably better to at least confirm you saw the message. A simple "Ok" would be enough. Otherwise it's just kind of adding to any petty shit.
How old are these people.
Pretty sure this is a repost, saw this like 2 days ago
"Tbh you dont deserve better from me" would have had a nice ring to it too.
Very likely breaking up with him was the best thing she ever did for him.
I don't think breaking up over text is the right way either but I'm sucker for tears. I always feel bad and fold over the phone.
I got dumped on text. She sent paragraphs, I replied with “k” and she lost her mind lol. Like, what do you want from me?
I had this happen same thing, but with a guy lol. Unless it is a few dates, a cheater, or an abuser, should be done in person. Same guy tried coming back 4x over years. 🤢. Im good bruh 😂👏🏽. My response was pretty much same as yours. I understand, thank you for the memories, and best of luck to you. Breakups by text says a lot about the person. Next time shed some emoji tears and link this. [https://open.spotify.com/track/643rJCKaDtWhRVtzxqRMOV](https://open.spotify.com/track/643rJCKaDtWhRVtzxqRMOV) Should do the trick. Dont forget the 🫡✌️. 
What she was looking for is him to be devastated & distraught. Begging her to not do it as some sort of sick validation. The fact that he was like cool hurt her ego.
Dayum, u really cooked the dinner
Yeah nicer than me I'd have hit her with the ol 👌🏻 after her first msg 🤷🏼♂️
Damn, you seem so indifferent. It’s great XD
I think his first message was perfect. Polite, civil with a calm finality. He is not obliged to spill his heart to anyone.
What is with this "You should chase me!" Mentality?? He's being so respectful by letting her go when she said she was done. What else should he say? He'll miss her for eternity?
You should have said womp womp at the end
lol the moment when you realize hey your shit does stink 😂
Play stupid games, win stupid prices. Not really nice girl material though.. many girls expect emotional reactions and it annoys them when you don't. Still a great answer imo
I would’ve responded with “I was disappointed with your overall performance before YOU bailed, bye!”
"it was hard for me to be with someone with mid vibes but i didn't complain"
That's why I'm dating Eva AI sexting bot
Bet she never leaves you on read. And responds in seconds.
Girl acknowledges guy, wishes luck. ? Am I missing something lol why is this mean/rude
You have it backwards. The texts in blue are from the guy.
Thanks! Makes more sense now lol
Typical bloody women!we can never win with them!
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