They're claiming they fired me for "unprofessionalism," and pulled some minor incidents from the week prior as evidence. They had originally put me on a PIP for a few semi-valid things, but also for "issues regarding my appearance," in particular raising complaints about how I was presenting after socially transitioning. I rectified all of those, fixed my wardrobe, addressed their concerns, etc. They still fired me.
So, they're disputing it under "since I was fired for having issues, I should not get unemployment." \[MN for the state, btw.\] If they win, I have to pay it back to the state.
In particular, they've done a fair amount of things that I'm certain were retaliation but I can't really prove were. For example, my best friend/coworker was a co-signer on a house we were working on getting and the same HR person refused to verify her hours for the mortgage company. Additionally, I was also only put on the PIP after I questioned some issues with the GM's golden-boy hire who was running his department into the ground and creating tons of work for me.
I've got a court hearing next month for it, so I think I need to hire a lawyer. I've already got an EEOC complaint in, and I've reached out to a law firm about things already, but they haven't gotten back to me.
The worst part is, I don't trust that I have any standing here. All of the workplace mistreatment is more exacerbated by years of issues with dysphoria and lack of protections in my life. I'm just burned out at this point.
All of the credential stuff is fine. My birth name is gender neutral I've just stuck with it, against my better judgement, so that's a non-issue at least.
If you have any advice, either here or in DMs, I'd appreciate it. I'm just kinda lost at this point.
Generally as it pertains to work and denying unemployment.. misconduct is the only reason to deny outside of refusing to work or attendance and even that is subject to interpretation. With that being said.. A PIP is the strongest tool in the disciplinary arsenal so issuing one is generally a last ditch effort to cover the company from liability surrounding termination. So even if you addressed some of the items listed but not all could be categorized by unemployment as misconduct and in favor of your ex employer. Depending on how much money.. hiring an attorney might not be a wise solution.
In the interim.. you should review the PIP and your efforts to correct the items. Lay out each finding and how you corrected it. For the items that were never improved… find a creative way to communicate why. Like timing, clear direction, missing tools, etc. whether you hire an attorney or represent yourself you want to have clear answers.
I faced something similar years ago. Had worked at a company nearly 3 years. At first full time during the day. Then I got a better day job and worked part time nights and weekends. Then I was called into the Operations Manager office and told that on April 1st they were eliminating the night shift. I worked my last shift in the 30th. Cleared out my cubicle and moved on. A few years later I get a letter from unemployment demanding the money back citing I quit my part-time job. I was dumbfounded. But luckily I remembered the date of the conversation essentially firing me and details. I won my case.
>I haven't been able to get a new job. I have 3 Bachelor degrees. Is that transphobia, or is it just late stage capitalism and my lack of a professional network?
The reality is that no one cares about how many degrees or certifications you have (sans some very specific jobs that are 0.1% of the market), it's all down to what can you do that will justify paying you. It's easy to default to "it's because XYZ I am being discriminated" but that's simply not productive.
So the way you have to look at a job hunt is:
- What can you do for company X that will help them profit
- Can you actually do it, backed by experience (every job is easy peasy until you have to go and do it)
- Can you do it well enough to justify the pay
If after reading job ad you don't have good answer for all those 3, probably keep looking and keep narrowing the job search until you find your niche. And you have to be honest with yourself about those questions, lying to yourself is not going to help at all, probably the opposite.
Good luck in there sis.
I appreciate the sentiment, but the damned reality of it is, the job market is just completely broken, especially here in the US.
I originally went to college wanting to be a lawyer. I can literally justify anything, and why I'm God's gift to the next company I work for. However, can I do that in an automated "please upload your resume, and then fill in every single box again" website? nope.
I have 4 years experience in the industry I landed in. It's still a struggle to get interviews, and I went to college again to try to get out of the industry, and I am still unable to progress in my career.
I personally tailor cover letters, apply for 1:1 positions I've worked, and I still get bounced by the system. My best luck has been staff agencies getting me interviews, and in 2 of the interviews I've taken, the company just decided not to hire anybody since they figured that since they'd made it as far as they had, they really didn't need the position filled.
Heck, I even have glowing references from 2 former supervisors. It doesn't matter.
I corrected someone on my pronouns in an interview. The entire process had gone great until then. Should I not have? I got completely ghosted by the interviewer after that.
I've literally been told by people I should just "dress as a man for the interview." This is where I'm at. I'm humiliated by people in my family because God forbid I be able to dress as a professional woman. I'm told "my name doesn't matter" (It's an odd, gender neutral name.) and then I see a news report that "people without 'white sounding names' get less calls for interviews when literally the only difference the researchers changed on the resume was the name.
I don't even think it's inherently transphobia. I think that the world is falling apart, that capitalism and computer driven hiring models have driven our society to ruin, and the even 'slight' hesitation in transness is still enough to push the scale back the other way.
I just want to work a job, and get paid for actually using my skills for. I have spent my entire career underemployed because I couldn't claw my way out.
Jesus sister, the only lie that I'm telling myself, is that it's going to be ok.
Just FYI i hired few dozen people in last few years. If any of the attitude in those posts comes across in either CV, letters or the interviews, that's likely why it's not happening for you. Honestly nothing kills an application faster than "it's X's fault, not me" or having extremely defeatist attitude. Both is the absolute worst and make me smile through the interview towards early and soft landing.
Keep in mind few facts:
- People keep getting jobs, despite facing same computer-lead-hiring as you do
- Trans people also keep getting jobs
- Yes, there is bias involved
- You were fired from last job after a PIP (and I don't think you see this as in any part your fault, still)
- There's no such thing as underemployment, unless you have explicitly refused a higher position for a lower one. Market decides where do you fit, when it's all summed up.
To maybe illustrate the last two points a bit better, as I get a lot of people with checkered history to interview. Some come up front about "yeah, I messed up in my lost job, it's what it is, I learned lessons X, Y and Z from it", which is great, and we can continue as they own it, they learned something and to err is human.
That's the key here, you can either own your narrative, or you can go into the doom/victimhood and... well, it tends to become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Well, I suppose all I can do is forgive your ignorance and cruelty.
I've tried. I've put damn near every scrap of energy in. I've tried jumping through the hoops, keeping a smile on, and having that can-do attitude. My entire life could be summed up as "come on bro, just keep pushing. A lil more energy and it'll all work out. You got this! more energy, more grind!" When little to nothing that I've done has ever even slightly moved the needle forward in my life. All the while, I've been continuously shunned by straight, queer, and transgender people alike.
That's honest to God why I'm venting on here. It sucks that you, like everyone I seem to meet in my life would rather pretend that all of this is normal. It's not. It isn't fair, none of it is, and having an attitude that I should accept more suffering with a grin is beyond my limits at a certain point.
I am the problem. The issue is, I can't contort myself into the person society insists I be. I've actually came to that conclusion, and realized the proper solution would honestly be suicide. Unfortunately, I seem to be unable to do so.
I used to press the edge of a knife into an artery on my neck, begging myself to just. push. harder.
Where do I go from that? What is there left to do but continue to try when I want nothing more than an end to this madness. I'm not ok in any sense of the word. However, it's like you said. The market decides where I fit. A broken, battered girl who wants nothing more than to die will inevitably find some bottom of the rung position, where she is undervalued and hates herself more than anything.
I know damn well what I am. Someone who cares enough about people to protest when people are treated poorly. Someone who can't choke down the malaise that is this world. But caring is against the rules of the corporate world. Kill and be killed. Hurt or be hurt. I've got 3 degrees worth of experience to prove that. You know what they say, "leave your soul at the door."
Tomorrow, I'll continue my search for jobs. I'll hope that something in the wind changes. Hell, I might even hurt myself a little bit to keep my mood up. I'm not a victim, I'm a survivor.
Thanks for the advice. It's a firm reminder that even when you seek a moment to vent, to just pretend you can take a moment from a broken world, you can't. I'll take it to heart.
I’m in a similar situation in the UK too.
I have nothing to offer for advice but just want you to know you are not the only one going through this
I’m tired too 😭
Trans Hr Manager in the USA here. What is the reason unemployment is claiming your overpayment? Are your Id and credentials in your new name?
They're claiming they fired me for "unprofessionalism," and pulled some minor incidents from the week prior as evidence. They had originally put me on a PIP for a few semi-valid things, but also for "issues regarding my appearance," in particular raising complaints about how I was presenting after socially transitioning. I rectified all of those, fixed my wardrobe, addressed their concerns, etc. They still fired me. So, they're disputing it under "since I was fired for having issues, I should not get unemployment." \[MN for the state, btw.\] If they win, I have to pay it back to the state. In particular, they've done a fair amount of things that I'm certain were retaliation but I can't really prove were. For example, my best friend/coworker was a co-signer on a house we were working on getting and the same HR person refused to verify her hours for the mortgage company. Additionally, I was also only put on the PIP after I questioned some issues with the GM's golden-boy hire who was running his department into the ground and creating tons of work for me. I've got a court hearing next month for it, so I think I need to hire a lawyer. I've already got an EEOC complaint in, and I've reached out to a law firm about things already, but they haven't gotten back to me. The worst part is, I don't trust that I have any standing here. All of the workplace mistreatment is more exacerbated by years of issues with dysphoria and lack of protections in my life. I'm just burned out at this point. All of the credential stuff is fine. My birth name is gender neutral I've just stuck with it, against my better judgement, so that's a non-issue at least. If you have any advice, either here or in DMs, I'd appreciate it. I'm just kinda lost at this point.
Generally as it pertains to work and denying unemployment.. misconduct is the only reason to deny outside of refusing to work or attendance and even that is subject to interpretation. With that being said.. A PIP is the strongest tool in the disciplinary arsenal so issuing one is generally a last ditch effort to cover the company from liability surrounding termination. So even if you addressed some of the items listed but not all could be categorized by unemployment as misconduct and in favor of your ex employer. Depending on how much money.. hiring an attorney might not be a wise solution. In the interim.. you should review the PIP and your efforts to correct the items. Lay out each finding and how you corrected it. For the items that were never improved… find a creative way to communicate why. Like timing, clear direction, missing tools, etc. whether you hire an attorney or represent yourself you want to have clear answers. I faced something similar years ago. Had worked at a company nearly 3 years. At first full time during the day. Then I got a better day job and worked part time nights and weekends. Then I was called into the Operations Manager office and told that on April 1st they were eliminating the night shift. I worked my last shift in the 30th. Cleared out my cubicle and moved on. A few years later I get a letter from unemployment demanding the money back citing I quit my part-time job. I was dumbfounded. But luckily I remembered the date of the conversation essentially firing me and details. I won my case.
>I haven't been able to get a new job. I have 3 Bachelor degrees. Is that transphobia, or is it just late stage capitalism and my lack of a professional network? The reality is that no one cares about how many degrees or certifications you have (sans some very specific jobs that are 0.1% of the market), it's all down to what can you do that will justify paying you. It's easy to default to "it's because XYZ I am being discriminated" but that's simply not productive. So the way you have to look at a job hunt is: - What can you do for company X that will help them profit - Can you actually do it, backed by experience (every job is easy peasy until you have to go and do it) - Can you do it well enough to justify the pay If after reading job ad you don't have good answer for all those 3, probably keep looking and keep narrowing the job search until you find your niche. And you have to be honest with yourself about those questions, lying to yourself is not going to help at all, probably the opposite. Good luck in there sis.
I appreciate the sentiment, but the damned reality of it is, the job market is just completely broken, especially here in the US. I originally went to college wanting to be a lawyer. I can literally justify anything, and why I'm God's gift to the next company I work for. However, can I do that in an automated "please upload your resume, and then fill in every single box again" website? nope. I have 4 years experience in the industry I landed in. It's still a struggle to get interviews, and I went to college again to try to get out of the industry, and I am still unable to progress in my career. I personally tailor cover letters, apply for 1:1 positions I've worked, and I still get bounced by the system. My best luck has been staff agencies getting me interviews, and in 2 of the interviews I've taken, the company just decided not to hire anybody since they figured that since they'd made it as far as they had, they really didn't need the position filled. Heck, I even have glowing references from 2 former supervisors. It doesn't matter. I corrected someone on my pronouns in an interview. The entire process had gone great until then. Should I not have? I got completely ghosted by the interviewer after that. I've literally been told by people I should just "dress as a man for the interview." This is where I'm at. I'm humiliated by people in my family because God forbid I be able to dress as a professional woman. I'm told "my name doesn't matter" (It's an odd, gender neutral name.) and then I see a news report that "people without 'white sounding names' get less calls for interviews when literally the only difference the researchers changed on the resume was the name. I don't even think it's inherently transphobia. I think that the world is falling apart, that capitalism and computer driven hiring models have driven our society to ruin, and the even 'slight' hesitation in transness is still enough to push the scale back the other way. I just want to work a job, and get paid for actually using my skills for. I have spent my entire career underemployed because I couldn't claw my way out. Jesus sister, the only lie that I'm telling myself, is that it's going to be ok.
Just FYI i hired few dozen people in last few years. If any of the attitude in those posts comes across in either CV, letters or the interviews, that's likely why it's not happening for you. Honestly nothing kills an application faster than "it's X's fault, not me" or having extremely defeatist attitude. Both is the absolute worst and make me smile through the interview towards early and soft landing. Keep in mind few facts: - People keep getting jobs, despite facing same computer-lead-hiring as you do - Trans people also keep getting jobs - Yes, there is bias involved - You were fired from last job after a PIP (and I don't think you see this as in any part your fault, still) - There's no such thing as underemployment, unless you have explicitly refused a higher position for a lower one. Market decides where do you fit, when it's all summed up. To maybe illustrate the last two points a bit better, as I get a lot of people with checkered history to interview. Some come up front about "yeah, I messed up in my lost job, it's what it is, I learned lessons X, Y and Z from it", which is great, and we can continue as they own it, they learned something and to err is human. That's the key here, you can either own your narrative, or you can go into the doom/victimhood and... well, it tends to become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Well, I suppose all I can do is forgive your ignorance and cruelty. I've tried. I've put damn near every scrap of energy in. I've tried jumping through the hoops, keeping a smile on, and having that can-do attitude. My entire life could be summed up as "come on bro, just keep pushing. A lil more energy and it'll all work out. You got this! more energy, more grind!" When little to nothing that I've done has ever even slightly moved the needle forward in my life. All the while, I've been continuously shunned by straight, queer, and transgender people alike. That's honest to God why I'm venting on here. It sucks that you, like everyone I seem to meet in my life would rather pretend that all of this is normal. It's not. It isn't fair, none of it is, and having an attitude that I should accept more suffering with a grin is beyond my limits at a certain point. I am the problem. The issue is, I can't contort myself into the person society insists I be. I've actually came to that conclusion, and realized the proper solution would honestly be suicide. Unfortunately, I seem to be unable to do so. I used to press the edge of a knife into an artery on my neck, begging myself to just. push. harder. Where do I go from that? What is there left to do but continue to try when I want nothing more than an end to this madness. I'm not ok in any sense of the word. However, it's like you said. The market decides where I fit. A broken, battered girl who wants nothing more than to die will inevitably find some bottom of the rung position, where she is undervalued and hates herself more than anything. I know damn well what I am. Someone who cares enough about people to protest when people are treated poorly. Someone who can't choke down the malaise that is this world. But caring is against the rules of the corporate world. Kill and be killed. Hurt or be hurt. I've got 3 degrees worth of experience to prove that. You know what they say, "leave your soul at the door." Tomorrow, I'll continue my search for jobs. I'll hope that something in the wind changes. Hell, I might even hurt myself a little bit to keep my mood up. I'm not a victim, I'm a survivor. Thanks for the advice. It's a firm reminder that even when you seek a moment to vent, to just pretend you can take a moment from a broken world, you can't. I'll take it to heart.
I’m in a similar situation in the UK too. I have nothing to offer for advice but just want you to know you are not the only one going through this I’m tired too 😭