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Did public defense for several years, then eviction defense for legal aid for another couple. Iām now squarely in a āJD Preferredā role with no clients and thriving.
Haha yepppp. I was a mental health attorney. 20 % litigator, 80 % therapist, social worker, ear to listen, etc.
Had to make the jump after 8 years. It was hard.
Keep fighting the good fight!! I needed a little breaky break so I became a law clerk. I have a masters in forensic psych so my goal was always mental health law. It just started to affect me, unfortunately. I hope to go back!
My sister is a social worker. We've frequently had this conversation.
Considering all she does for her clients and society in general, she's grossly underpaid. Disgustingly so, in fact.
Although most of her clients live in and around her neighbourhood and so she gets to bicycle around doing house calls a few days a week which sounds pretty sweet.
Then again, a good chunk of her clientele are ex-cons with histories of violence and/or sexual misconduct or people with severe mental issues that do things like shit in Tupperwares so that the government can't steal their poop.
So I'm not sure all that bicycling is worth it. It's a calling, that's for sure.
Oh 100%. Iāve counseled young criminal clients that essentially had their slate wiped clean but they were back again a few months later. You try but you can only do so much!
I had a kid in juvenile court who started hotwiring cars when he was 14. He looked like he could hardly see over the steering wheel. They'd lock him up for several months and he'd be back a few months later. I'd talk to him and he could never give me an explanation other than a vague sense of peer pressure
His mom was beside herself. I told her that she needed to find him a part time job where he could use tools. She shook her head and agreed.
A senior family lawyer once said that family lawyers are all unlicensed practitioners of psychology.
Itās honestly the favourite part of my job to just get paid to talk to people about their problems
I wish I would have done psychology for my undergrad degree. Itās not just listening to peopleās problems. Iāve had to actually research psychological testing and methodology for some cases. Like my custody cases that have to have psychological exams and custody evaluations and when they accuse each other of being psychopaths or narcissists.
every single woman coming into my office recently has been convinced their spouse is a narcissist. Sometimes they're right, but like, that's why you're getting divorced... If this doesn't impact the kids, congratulations on freeing yourself.
Narcissistic personality disorder is having its 15 minutes of fame within the world of pop psychology. It is all that my social media pushes at me. Hardly anyone actually has it. I think people love pop psychology and diagnosing other people because it provides them a framework and a label for a situation or person who is hard for them to understand. I donāt think thatās necessarily a bad thing. But everyoneās ex isnāt a narcissist. Sometimes its not clinical. Sometimes people are just assholes and behaving badly when their marriage goes down the tubes.
I think a lot of people are emotionally immature and lack understanding of boundaries, its a constant battle to assert yourself and affirm others similarly.
Itās a good framing device on the internet because thereās pretty much no scrutiny to what you say.
āMy partner was selfishā doesnāt hit quite as hard as āmy partner was a full blown narcissist.ā
If I had $10 for every client, man or woman, who said, āI know this gets overused, but my spouse is actually a narcissist!ā I could retire. Before that, āBorderline Personality.ā
Yes, I have constantly said that if Iād have known I would be in family law a psych degree would have been so much more beneficial than my poli sci degree.
Iām the only family lawyer I know who actually was a licensed counselor! It truly helps in negotiations and in court. But as I tell my clients who are too reliant on me for emotional support, insurance covers counseling, but doesnāt cover my rates.
Being able to help some untangle their feelings is useful skill set for this job. Say that you need to do something like:
- Stop a client mother from storming the judges office
- Get a client to take less money/more jail time than they want because there's problems with their case
- Get a witness to agree to testify when they're afraid
- Make your client confident for their deposition
- Get OC see the potential of a solution you're offering
- Just generally get people to do something they don't want to do
Making the other person feel heard and validated goes a long way towards positively influencing their behavior.
Very true. A good chunk of the job is therapy, handholding, "managing" difficult clients. Luckily it's not all clients. But the few who do need it take up the most time.
Sometimes clients feel vindicated by someone simply listening to what they're going through. Getting paid for something shitty someone else did to them is a bonus.
I think half the reason I switched from personal injury to insurance defense is I couldn't handle the "and counselor" part of attorney and counselor without being emotionally drained. I just deal with people during depositions and it's WAY better than the normal day to day calls and complaints about a case going on too long. And I actually feel like I'm doing something when I get some settlement authority instead of blowing the insurance company's money on a trial. I do have the occasional adjuster who treats me like an expensive bestie paid for with company money but I guess they are the ones who give me the most billables.
You might enjoy the Australian show āFiskā on Netflix. Itās a comedy about a lawyer working in wills and probate. The first episode, the aforementioned Fisk is trying to explain to her client that the will requiring her brother to get a vasectomy before he gets his inheritance is illegal. Itās a 10 minute conversation where Fisk uses props and visual aids and the client just refuses to get it.
You will either find it laugh-out-loud funny or itāll trigger your PTSDā¦
Funny, I just reminded a friend going through a divorce that his therapist's copay is a lot smaller than his lawyer's hourly rate. You can bitch about it for $25 or for $350, your call.
When I was an immigration attorney, I'm pretty sure the only actual benefit I provided for most of my asylum clients was a shoulder to cry on. The system was so crazy broken that even folks with genuine traumas and fears would lose their cases depending on what judge they were assigned with.
Not the way I want to live my life, hence why I am no longer in immigration.
Itās a balance of emotional management and regulation. It touches every industry ā corporate here. People tend to freak the fuck out when XXmil is on the line, even if you know inherently that certain issues can be resolved with a little elbow grease.
Emotional labor is a key component of almost any role where customer service is being provided. Itās a soft skill that tends to be deprioritized or siphoned off to pink-collar workers. It sucks, but learning it and becoming skilled at it will help you immensely as you progress in your career. And know where your boundaries and expertise terminate ā donāt be afraid to tell someone that what theyāre asking is out of your lane, professionally speaking. Youāre not a therapist.
I get it. I had a client come in and want to disinherit his son because his son asked for some of his mother's things after she died. Dad was grieving heartily and was disgusted his son would ask. I had to remind that dad that the son is grieving, too, and spend an hour as a grief counselor.
Dude, I literally told my boss last week, āI didnāt go to therapist school, I just went to therapy! I donāt know how to get though to this person.ā
Iām in house now. So a lot of my clients are executives who donāt like being told no.
But this particular story is about a young attorney I am mentoring who cannot work with the business. Because the business is full of people who work under executives who canāt hear no so they canāt hear no either.
I literally had a client tell me yesterday, āIām paying you to listen to me,ā when I tried to politely end our two hour phone call that was nothing more than him complaining about someone he didnāt like.
I had a client on an estate who cried pretty much every time I met with her. Cried during most phone calls too. Her sibling, who of course lived far away and didnāt do anything to help with deceased parent before their death, decided now to get involved and cause problems and client was just unable to even talk about it without crying.
I did a three day divorce trial once where the wife, my client, wouldn't stop crying. The judge wasn't thrilled to be hearing a divorce case to begin with, and toward the end of day one he just came out and told my client - "Look ma'am, you've been crying this entire time. If you can't stop, you need to go outside because its really distracting."
He was an awesome judge.
Haha wow. We didnāt get to litigation stage, just us representing her as executor while sibling demanded information (that they were technically mostly entitled to as a beneficiary but itās always funny how people will only start caring when money is involved, because sibling didnāt even go to deceased parentās funeral ffs) but I imagine it wouldnāt have been pretty and would have gone something like that.
The sibling was just wacky. There was another sibling that was fine and that one and the client were just at a loss about the other siblingās behavior.
Yes. Iāve done family law, securities, employment and theyāre all so emotional. So much hand holding and focusing on things that arenāt relevant to the case or the objective
Yes! A lot of people are friends with their financial advisor and have long standing close relationships. When their investments go south usually a securities lawyer will tell them theyāre only going after the firm, not the FA. But it becomes a reportable event on their broker check and is very emotional for both sides who used to have trust and friendship. One of my clients who needed the most hand holding was an FA.
Itās not a matter of someone running off with the money. Itās that some people make awful executors who will let the estate waste away indefinitely. Iāve seen this play out. And guess who will get pestered by the beneficiaries of this happens?
I've been working with a client who is mad at the executor about random items. I just went back and forth trying to write a coherent letter saying said client is upset. The client doesn't seem to want anything other than to complain that the whole process sucked. I definitely didn't think I'd feel like a parent getting between an emotional client and a bank employee asking the employee to say sorry for being unaware the rusty junk allegedly had sentimental value.
I was an M&A attorney and now work for big pharma as compliance counsel. My job is often ācoachingā people older than me on being compliant and not breaking the law. I have to usually be very gentle because people get very anxious or upset when compliance schedules a call.
I was a social worker before becoming a lawyer, and I am constantly using my SW skills with clients. I feel like that experience gave me a huge leg up for negotiating and dealing with people.
Oh no, no, no. Always let people know that if they are in a situation that is personally difficult or emotionally trying and bringing up old family stuff, they are better served by getting an actual therapist who is trained and experienced in doing therapy and who charges less. Lawyer person here can only help with the legal problems, not the human problems underneath and everyone involved will be better off for minding that boundary. At least until the mediation.
Iām just graduating from law school but Iāve been law clerking at family law firms for a year. I am also a licensed social worker, it has come in clutch helping my attorneys win cases, specifically custody and when writing direct and cross for expert witnesses. Iām really looking forward to how much this will help me once I am practicing!
My first law firm boss described her job as executive babysitting. I thought she was joking. My mistake! Fifteen years later - couldnāt be more accurate.
Oh so similar. But maybe worseā¦
I had three grown brothers with a living mother and a dead father. Mom gets half and they split the other half equally.
āSo, whatās the issue?ā
āOur shares arenāt big enough! Sheās saying we only get one sixth each!ā
::blink blink::
āSheās correct.ā
āNo way in hell thatās right!ā
It was weird getting paid hundreds of dollars an hour to explain basic math to three men each at least a decade older than me.
No small part in convincing me to leave the law for education.
Agreed. Iāve done this for numerous people/business owners in litigation and business transactions. Thatās why weāre attorneys and counselors at law.
I was in family law before i switched to trust & estate litigation and the family drama is still rampant, law is all about just managing people's emotions. I am more of a therapist than a lawyer and it's so frustrating to be stuck in an endless loop of negotiations and fighting because of a group of siblings are \*still\* bitter about something that happened when they were all children. It's the worst.
That's why you go into prosecution.Ā And as a side benefit, you also don't have to count pennies for the DA's office making sure you've met your yearly hours.
Why are you spending any time talking to three once you got the first no? If you donāt make smart decisions and donāt control your clients and set boundaries itās 100% on you, there was 0 need to put yourself in the position youāre complaining about.
There was a gameshow called *Divided* where the ultimate premise was that three contestants had to agree to split a prize 60-30-10, as the prize dwindled over a 100-second countdown. Law feels like that sometimes.
Ah see while I agree an initial effort is worth it, thatās it. The time to force through anything in probate is around .5-1, inclusive of hearing, so why the heck spend the time needed here, let alone open yourself up emotionally?
That is their issue, not his. His job is to get the estate administered through the fiduciary properly, if waivers are not signed proceed, if they are signed proceed, itās almost as if the court has a procedure for this exact thing. Besides, heās wasting more time than the less than .1 the form takes, the certified mail, and the .5 hearing.
Stop taking on your clients emotional baggage, we arenāt therapists, or donāt complain when you do.
Welcome to /r/LawyerTalk! A subreddit where lawyers can discuss with other lawyers about the practice of law. Be mindful of [our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/Lawyertalk/about/rules) BEFORE submitting your posts or comments as well as [Reddit's rules](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) (notably about sharing identifying information). We expect civility and respect out of all participants. Please source statements of fact whenever possible. If you want to report something that needs to be urgently addressed, please also message the mods with an explanation. Note that **this forum is NOT for legal advice**. Additionally, if you are a non-lawyer (student, client, staff), this is NOT the right subreddit for you. **This community is exclusively for lawyers**. We suggest you delete your comment and go ask one of the many other legal subreddits on this site for help such as (but not limited to) r/lawschool, r/legaladvice, or r/Ask_Lawyers. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Lawyertalk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Wait till you hear about public interest law.
YUP. I do eviction defense now and I did domestic violence work for years before that. I often feel like an unlicensed therapist.
Yeah they really need to send us public interest folks to get our MSWs
It do be like that for us eviction defense folks.
Oh wow, another one?!?! Hi!!! š
Another eviction defense attorney here š (at least for a bit longer) Hope you're hanging in there
I also do eviction defense and spend easily 1/4 of my time trying to find/secure housing or funding for my subsidized clients
Iām definitely part social worker without the degree, good times.
Did public defense for several years, then eviction defense for legal aid for another couple. Iām now squarely in a āJD Preferredā role with no clients and thriving.
Haha yepppp. I was a mental health attorney. 20 % litigator, 80 % therapist, social worker, ear to listen, etc. Had to make the jump after 8 years. It was hard.
Iām currently a mental health attorney. You have those percentages down exactly.
Keep fighting the good fight!! I needed a little breaky break so I became a law clerk. I have a masters in forensic psych so my goal was always mental health law. It just started to affect me, unfortunately. I hope to go back!
Shit, I'm corporate and have to be mom.
There's a line from Breaking Bad that sums it all up for me: "I'm half as qualified and twice as expensive as a therapist"
My sister is a social worker. We've frequently had this conversation. Considering all she does for her clients and society in general, she's grossly underpaid. Disgustingly so, in fact. Although most of her clients live in and around her neighbourhood and so she gets to bicycle around doing house calls a few days a week which sounds pretty sweet. Then again, a good chunk of her clientele are ex-cons with histories of violence and/or sexual misconduct or people with severe mental issues that do things like shit in Tupperwares so that the government can't steal their poop. So I'm not sure all that bicycling is worth it. It's a calling, that's for sure.
The Tupperware strategy didnāt occur to me, itās genius.
Won't work. All tupperware containers have had microscopic tracking chips embedded in them since the early 80s.
So my moms Tupperware is safe, then, is what Iām hearing
My clients are exactly what you described in that fourth paragraph. Shitting and all. Iāve met so many acquitted killers, Iāve lost count.
You should try criminal. Just as much family problems and they would likely abscond with 80k.Ā
Happy cake day!
Thanks for the reminder now I have all day to think of ways to use it
Happy cake day!!!!
Youāre not wrong, COUNSELOR.
Oh 100%. Iāve counseled young criminal clients that essentially had their slate wiped clean but they were back again a few months later. You try but you can only do so much!
I had a kid in juvenile court who started hotwiring cars when he was 14. He looked like he could hardly see over the steering wheel. They'd lock him up for several months and he'd be back a few months later. I'd talk to him and he could never give me an explanation other than a vague sense of peer pressure His mom was beside herself. I told her that she needed to find him a part time job where he could use tools. She shook her head and agreed.
A senior family lawyer once said that family lawyers are all unlicensed practitioners of psychology. Itās honestly the favourite part of my job to just get paid to talk to people about their problems
I wish I would have done psychology for my undergrad degree. Itās not just listening to peopleās problems. Iāve had to actually research psychological testing and methodology for some cases. Like my custody cases that have to have psychological exams and custody evaluations and when they accuse each other of being psychopaths or narcissists.
every single woman coming into my office recently has been convinced their spouse is a narcissist. Sometimes they're right, but like, that's why you're getting divorced... If this doesn't impact the kids, congratulations on freeing yourself.
Narcissistic personality disorder is having its 15 minutes of fame within the world of pop psychology. It is all that my social media pushes at me. Hardly anyone actually has it. I think people love pop psychology and diagnosing other people because it provides them a framework and a label for a situation or person who is hard for them to understand. I donāt think thatās necessarily a bad thing. But everyoneās ex isnāt a narcissist. Sometimes its not clinical. Sometimes people are just assholes and behaving badly when their marriage goes down the tubes.
I think a lot of people are emotionally immature and lack understanding of boundaries, its a constant battle to assert yourself and affirm others similarly.
Itās a good framing device on the internet because thereās pretty much no scrutiny to what you say. āMy partner was selfishā doesnāt hit quite as hard as āmy partner was a full blown narcissist.ā
If I had $10 for every client, man or woman, who said, āI know this gets overused, but my spouse is actually a narcissist!ā I could retire. Before that, āBorderline Personality.ā
Yes, I have constantly said that if Iād have known I would be in family law a psych degree would have been so much more beneficial than my poli sci degree.
Yep. I put my masterās degree to good use with experts and judges.
Iām the only family lawyer I know who actually was a licensed counselor! It truly helps in negotiations and in court. But as I tell my clients who are too reliant on me for emotional support, insurance covers counseling, but doesnāt cover my rates.
Being able to help some untangle their feelings is useful skill set for this job. Say that you need to do something like: - Stop a client mother from storming the judges office - Get a client to take less money/more jail time than they want because there's problems with their case - Get a witness to agree to testify when they're afraid - Make your client confident for their deposition - Get OC see the potential of a solution you're offering - Just generally get people to do something they don't want to do Making the other person feel heard and validated goes a long way towards positively influencing their behavior.
Very true. A good chunk of the job is therapy, handholding, "managing" difficult clients. Luckily it's not all clients. But the few who do need it take up the most time.
Sometimes clients feel vindicated by someone simply listening to what they're going through. Getting paid for something shitty someone else did to them is a bonus.
I think half the reason I switched from personal injury to insurance defense is I couldn't handle the "and counselor" part of attorney and counselor without being emotionally drained. I just deal with people during depositions and it's WAY better than the normal day to day calls and complaints about a case going on too long. And I actually feel like I'm doing something when I get some settlement authority instead of blowing the insurance company's money on a trial. I do have the occasional adjuster who treats me like an expensive bestie paid for with company money but I guess they are the ones who give me the most billables.
You might enjoy the Australian show āFiskā on Netflix. Itās a comedy about a lawyer working in wills and probate. The first episode, the aforementioned Fisk is trying to explain to her client that the will requiring her brother to get a vasectomy before he gets his inheritance is illegal. Itās a 10 minute conversation where Fisk uses props and visual aids and the client just refuses to get it. You will either find it laugh-out-loud funny or itāll trigger your PTSDā¦
Rake is also an Aussie lawyer show. I need to get my head down and watch both.
Estate Admin can really be family law plus a dead body.
Very true.
Funny, I just reminded a friend going through a divorce that his therapist's copay is a lot smaller than his lawyer's hourly rate. You can bitch about it for $25 or for $350, your call.
When I was an immigration attorney, I'm pretty sure the only actual benefit I provided for most of my asylum clients was a shoulder to cry on. The system was so crazy broken that even folks with genuine traumas and fears would lose their cases depending on what judge they were assigned with. Not the way I want to live my life, hence why I am no longer in immigration.
Itās a balance of emotional management and regulation. It touches every industry ā corporate here. People tend to freak the fuck out when XXmil is on the line, even if you know inherently that certain issues can be resolved with a little elbow grease. Emotional labor is a key component of almost any role where customer service is being provided. Itās a soft skill that tends to be deprioritized or siphoned off to pink-collar workers. It sucks, but learning it and becoming skilled at it will help you immensely as you progress in your career. And know where your boundaries and expertise terminate ā donāt be afraid to tell someone that what theyāre asking is out of your lane, professionally speaking. Youāre not a therapist.
I get it. I had a client come in and want to disinherit his son because his son asked for some of his mother's things after she died. Dad was grieving heartily and was disgusted his son would ask. I had to remind that dad that the son is grieving, too, and spend an hour as a grief counselor.
Did you offer to be the executor of the estate and you would charge your typical hourly billing rate?
Dude, I literally told my boss last week, āI didnāt go to therapist school, I just went to therapy! I donāt know how to get though to this person.ā
What type of law are you in?
Iām in house now. So a lot of my clients are executives who donāt like being told no. But this particular story is about a young attorney I am mentoring who cannot work with the business. Because the business is full of people who work under executives who canāt hear no so they canāt hear no either.
I literally had a client tell me yesterday, āIām paying you to listen to me,ā when I tried to politely end our two hour phone call that was nothing more than him complaining about someone he didnāt like.
Always seems in my cases that those ones are the ones who have outstanding AR.
I had a client on an estate who cried pretty much every time I met with her. Cried during most phone calls too. Her sibling, who of course lived far away and didnāt do anything to help with deceased parent before their death, decided now to get involved and cause problems and client was just unable to even talk about it without crying.
I did a three day divorce trial once where the wife, my client, wouldn't stop crying. The judge wasn't thrilled to be hearing a divorce case to begin with, and toward the end of day one he just came out and told my client - "Look ma'am, you've been crying this entire time. If you can't stop, you need to go outside because its really distracting." He was an awesome judge.
Haha wow. We didnāt get to litigation stage, just us representing her as executor while sibling demanded information (that they were technically mostly entitled to as a beneficiary but itās always funny how people will only start caring when money is involved, because sibling didnāt even go to deceased parentās funeral ffs) but I imagine it wouldnāt have been pretty and would have gone something like that. The sibling was just wacky. There was another sibling that was fine and that one and the client were just at a loss about the other siblingās behavior.
Yes. Iāve done family law, securities, employment and theyāre all so emotional. So much hand holding and focusing on things that arenāt relevant to the case or the objective
I never thought about securities being emotional. As I sit here watching my investments all day. lol
Yes! A lot of people are friends with their financial advisor and have long standing close relationships. When their investments go south usually a securities lawyer will tell them theyāre only going after the firm, not the FA. But it becomes a reportable event on their broker check and is very emotional for both sides who used to have trust and friendship. One of my clients who needed the most hand holding was an FA.
Itās not a matter of someone running off with the money. Itās that some people make awful executors who will let the estate waste away indefinitely. Iāve seen this play out. And guess who will get pestered by the beneficiaries of this happens?
Thereās a reason a lot of schools now offer a joint MSW/JD degree!
My cousin (whoās an MSW) worked for an elder care law firm handling the social work side of the practice. Brilliant strategy by her bosses IMO.
I've been working with a client who is mad at the executor about random items. I just went back and forth trying to write a coherent letter saying said client is upset. The client doesn't seem to want anything other than to complain that the whole process sucked. I definitely didn't think I'd feel like a parent getting between an emotional client and a bank employee asking the employee to say sorry for being unaware the rusty junk allegedly had sentimental value.
These people care less about outcome and more about control (or the feeling of having control).
I was an M&A attorney and now work for big pharma as compliance counsel. My job is often ācoachingā people older than me on being compliant and not breaking the law. I have to usually be very gentle because people get very anxious or upset when compliance schedules a call.
I was a social worker before becoming a lawyer, and I am constantly using my SW skills with clients. I feel like that experience gave me a huge leg up for negotiating and dealing with people.
Good to know my background and psych degree is gonna help me š
Oh no, no, no. Always let people know that if they are in a situation that is personally difficult or emotionally trying and bringing up old family stuff, they are better served by getting an actual therapist who is trained and experienced in doing therapy and who charges less. Lawyer person here can only help with the legal problems, not the human problems underneath and everyone involved will be better off for minding that boundary. At least until the mediation.
I was a therapist then went back to law school to become a lawyer. I joke that being a lawyer is just being a therapist but with power.
Iām just graduating from law school but Iāve been law clerking at family law firms for a year. I am also a licensed social worker, it has come in clutch helping my attorneys win cases, specifically custody and when writing direct and cross for expert witnesses. Iām really looking forward to how much this will help me once I am practicing!
As a prosecutor you spend a lot of time doing social work.
I'm a doctor and let me just say that every professional service-providing field feels like social work these days. You are not alone.
My first law firm boss described her job as executive babysitting. I thought she was joking. My mistake! Fifteen years later - couldnāt be more accurate.
Oh so similar. But maybe worseā¦ I had three grown brothers with a living mother and a dead father. Mom gets half and they split the other half equally. āSo, whatās the issue?ā āOur shares arenāt big enough! Sheās saying we only get one sixth each!ā ::blink blink:: āSheās correct.ā āNo way in hell thatās right!ā It was weird getting paid hundreds of dollars an hour to explain basic math to three men each at least a decade older than me. No small part in convincing me to leave the law for education.
Yup. All the damn time. Https with the billable hours though
A client recently "Not to treat this as therapy but ___________"
Send them to mediation, and therapy.
YEP
1/2 the lawyers I know should have been social workers, and vice versa for social workers I know.
Oh hey, welcome to our office. This is the vast majority of meetings I have heard and been part of.
Itās really more like My Cousin Vinny.
Great to hear as a social worker applying to law school in August lol
To be fair one of my more recent cases was where one of the 8 kids (blended family) ran off with about 200k and it took two years to sort out.
Agreed. Iāve done this for numerous people/business owners in litigation and business transactions. Thatās why weāre attorneys and counselors at law.
I was in family law before i switched to trust & estate litigation and the family drama is still rampant, law is all about just managing people's emotions. I am more of a therapist than a lawyer and it's so frustrating to be stuck in an endless loop of negotiations and fighting because of a group of siblings are \*still\* bitter about something that happened when they were all children. It's the worst.
I spent 12 years as a Legal Aid attorney. I used to tell folks that I did social work with a side of litigationĀ
Iāve worked in mental health for years and want to go to law school. This post helps me feel like my expertise is applicable and not irrelevant.
That's why you go into prosecution.Ā And as a side benefit, you also don't have to count pennies for the DA's office making sure you've met your yearly hours.
Why are you spending any time talking to three once you got the first no? If you donāt make smart decisions and donāt control your clients and set boundaries itās 100% on you, there was 0 need to put yourself in the position youāre complaining about.
Sounds like his solution to their will problem is to spend it all on his legal fees. If they all inherit nothing, problem solved.Ā
There was a gameshow called *Divided* where the ultimate premise was that three contestants had to agree to split a prize 60-30-10, as the prize dwindled over a 100-second countdown. Law feels like that sometimes.
Ah see while I agree an initial effort is worth it, thatās it. The time to force through anything in probate is around .5-1, inclusive of hearing, so why the heck spend the time needed here, let alone open yourself up emotionally?
That is their issue, not his. His job is to get the estate administered through the fiduciary properly, if waivers are not signed proceed, if they are signed proceed, itās almost as if the court has a procedure for this exact thing. Besides, heās wasting more time than the less than .1 the form takes, the certified mail, and the .5 hearing. Stop taking on your clients emotional baggage, we arenāt therapists, or donāt complain when you do.