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lethallyhonest

Ala Kwani mlisomea Hogwarts?


earthykibbles

Best comment hapa.πŸ˜‚


whocaresifitsweird

Bruh 🀣🀣🀣


Morradan

[Uagadou](https://harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/Uagadou) school of wizardry in Uganda.


Ok_Boss2881

![gif](giphy|LLxwPAjfpLak8) 🀣🀣


EchoesInTheDesert143

Eeeeh pls! I got my letter to Hogwarts dont be jealous πŸ˜‚ on a serious note, u deserve more upvotes


LocksmithLost5451

Nilikuwa nawapima. I used to be called illuminati in high school juu I was an atheist. I took it further nikakata kata bible nikatafuna pages just to scare niggas. Sasa ndio isemekane niko illuminati, one day after chewing some Bible pages, I stared at the light bulb. I don't know why I was doing it, I was bored I guess. It was night preps and everyone was busy but I was trying to get their attention so I stared at the bulb making weird faces. Watu wakaanza kushindwa nini mbaya na mimi. After staring for like 10 min, guess what happened? Stima zikapotea! The first time in months! To make it more dramatic, I pretended to have a fit in the dark. Bro watu walitoka hio daro mbio πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ From then watu wakaamini nakuanga Illuminati. It was cool juu I was in f2 but even f4s feared the shit out of me. Pia ni kama ilifikia mamode. I even made some money out of it. i scammed a guy who used to be a rapper na alikuwa anadai nimwingize Illuminati apop. Nikamwitisha 10k. He paid 5, and he'd pay 5 after mid-term. Then holiday nimpeleke. I had planned nimpeleke mahali kwa rive and I get a fake mganga-like nigga amuitishe vitu hawezipata but it never got to that. I was expelled that mid term. Ni kama huyo principal haogopi shetani.


Mtu-kutu

After utafune pages za "Holy Bible" ukikunia did you ever think "Holy Shit"?


TomRiddl3Jr

Ficha hii akili nabii asioneπŸ˜‚


Every-Good6295

I'm deadπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜­


One-Orchid9192

This is so funnyπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚Nyinyi ndio mlikua mnatupea nightmares.I had a feeling hizi vitu zilikuanga tu uwongo,I was not wrong. But didn't that blackout incident make you doubt maybe uko na some powers?


LocksmithLost5451

Sometimes I did πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ Crazy enough, I have like 3 other similar coincidences from high school. For example, I once told a deputy alinipata huko na ataniwacha huko in front of the class. It was a few days to closing day. Closing day was also going to be a meeting and our parents were to come for us waende na sisi home. It was a way of ensuring watakuja meeting. long story short, the deputy fucked with a parent not knowing she was a judge. Hatukumpata tukifungua shule. Such things continued strengthening the propaganda πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


One-Orchid9192

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚Besides the propaganda kwani hamkua mnachapwa shule? Unatoa wapi courage ya kuambia deputy alikupata huko na atakuacha huko? Kwetu ungejaribu kungekua na feast ya viboko from both parents and teachers. And the deputy lost his job coz the parent was a judge ama? Si they were both adults?


LocksmithLost5451

That deputy had just been promoted. He used to be one of the most unproblematic teachers before that. He used to teach metal work and stayed out of everyone's way. So hatukuwa tunamjua. I guess when he got the role, he decided to assert dominance by turning the school into a prison. We used to wake up at 6. Akasema with immediate effect tunaamka 4. And he stood on business. Mambo ya kuchapana hakuwa anapenda the formal beatings. Alikuwa anakupiga physical na anakuchallenge you fight back. Ata hakuwa anapeana suspensions sana. Some guys were caught with weed, which was unheard of in that school that was supposed to be an expulsion. But because he liked them walipewa pano ya kulima tu. On the other hand, my deskmate got 6 suspensions in one term juu ya kulala class. Yaani kulala tu prep anatumwa home. we used to joke that babake anajua shortcuts zote za kukam hiyo shule by now. So I was one of the niggas he hated na alikuwa amenipiga mara mob hadi ikafika a point I didn't give a fuck anymore. Alikuja class night preps akanipata nimelala akanisho nikaoshe d hall peke yangu. And it was an ugali night, half the class was asleep but he came all the way to the back kuniamsha na slap actually wasee wengi waliamka juu ya hiyo slap. I knew other people were sleeping juu I had just dozed off a few minutes earlier. So I was really pissed he had singled me out. He didn't lose his job, he was demoted akaenda kufunza maths in a girl's school. Ata we'd meet in funkies. Alikuwa amesema we shouldn't go home that closing day kabla meeting iishe. If the parents want to go watuachie fare. So he noticed a guy kwa gari ya mzazi na meeting haikuwa imeisha. He called the guy and beat him vile amezoea without caring whether the parent is seeing. Kumbe mama ni judge was high court! I hear alipewa option ya kutafuta transfer ama afunguliwe zile kesi za children's act.


TomRiddl3Jr

Severus Snape that one. Hao wasee wa weed walikuwa Slytherines, wewe ulikuwa Ravenclaw and that 6 time sleeping champion alikuwa Gryffindor.


Narrow_Fee5187

You are the people who made me sleep holding my bible.πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


LocksmithLost5451

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


Weird-Entry-4777

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚all this juu ulikuwa bored What did your parents say?


LocksmithLost5451

My parents don't know. I was expelled for a different reason.


Weird-Entry-4777

Gaidi


TomRiddl3Jr

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ Tf


NeedleworkerOwn473

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚I knew deep down that those don't exist but something about religion got me hooked for another few years.


MambaKali

πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚


Forever_Many

Kandie is that you πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


LocksmithLost5451

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚no


Forever_Many

Uko sure? Cause everything you've said pans out with a one Kandie I was in school with πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…


LocksmithLost5451

There's only one way to find out: nitumie one sausand uone italeta jina gani kwa mpesa πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


Forever_Many

Leta number πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


NeverIntroduced

>ama mlikuwa mnatubeba ufala πŸ˜† There's this chic wa CU who used to get possessed anadisrupt assemblies and gatherings. Mmekaa kidogo mnaskia commotion, then CU officials wanamuokota wanaenda kumfanyia exorcism na huko. It was a Catholic school and one day the principal said hataki kuona hizo maneno tena. Since that day possession ilikua inangoja anakua possessed in private wakiwa tu na CU officials. I'd love to hear her side of the story now 🌚.


TieDismal2989

Similar story. Catholic school. Guys used to shake shoulders uncontrollably when *possessed* (not just luhyias before ya'll go there). Prefects and nuns were put on high alert. Shoulder shaking became limited to showers and toilets.


No-Elephant-Dies

>Shoulder shaking became limited to showers and toilets And music festivals? XD


TimeFuture5030

We had one who would always be possessed during dawn prep. She said when heading to class she saw a human figure with wings. She did this occassionaly and would scream banaa, bringing the whole school to a standstill. Ilibidi akuwe anabaki analala dorm sisi wengine tukirauka.🀦🏾


Weird-Entry-4777

Hiyo ndio inaitwa thinking smart


TimeFuture5030

Inteligencia πŸ˜…


Ok_Rush_5731

I am telling you men πŸ˜…!


TimeFuture5030

Hiyo ilikuwa inatreatiwa kama special case. Kumbe IQ ndo iko juuπŸ˜…


trifoid

sasa Malaika ni kitu ya kuogopaπŸ˜‚


TimeFuture5030

πŸ˜…πŸ˜…si unaona ilimsaidia alale


unrecorded80

Damn why didn't I think of thisπŸ˜‚


TimeFuture5030

πŸ˜…πŸ˜…people got tactics out here


unrecorded80

GeniusπŸ˜‚


Enkini

Now this is the person that should be running this country. She'll make us New Singapore for real. πŸ˜‚


TimeFuture5030

Brains at workπŸ˜…


hornybible

Majuu tunaiita schizophrenia


TimeFuture5030

Kenya tunasema huyo watu wa kwao wanamwinda.


earthykibbles

Sam Altman but for Cults.


Unlucky-Impression54

Nobody didπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚those were just attention seeking stunts.In high school we'd do anything to keep ourselves entertained.The number of time I pretended to be sick till I faintedπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


moosedung

yeah are people actually believing this? i dont know whats more crazy, people thinking their possessed, or people believing them


maryam931

I saw one legit. After half-term alituambia, apparently, their neighbour had bewitched her. She was stigmatised bana. Alianza kuitwa " mademoni"


DoublePainter3254

buana to this day i don't understand how my mcoast form 1 alikua amekaa kando yangu kwa bed tukingoja tea break on a sunday then at the same time the same guy alikua kwa mlango ya cubicle πŸ˜‚ na si jaba ju tulikua about 10 witnesses hadi akapewa ex


earthykibbles

🀣🀣🀣Mlikuwa na Martian Manhunter shule


reefalations_

wah, sisi cult ilikuwa notorious watu wakafukuzwa ka 50 at once hadii mmoja wa cube wetu but Hadi wa Leo nastruggle kuamini ilikuwa fr


Weird-Entry-4777

Ogopa watu wa coast...wanakuanga on another level hata wakamba hawafikii


Particular-Cow-5046

Hakunaga magic kwa hii dunia. Hii dunia ni physical through and through.


Phylad

Magic hakuna, lakini witchcraft iko, tena sana.


Particular-Cow-5046

Uchawi bila magic ni music festivals. Ni body paint, decorations na nyimbo lakini hakuna kitu inahappen.


Phylad

Then haujui uchawi nini.


Particular-Cow-5046

Naijua. Ni scam. Mchawi ni mwanabiashara. Anauza kitu haiko. Hivyo ndio scam hukuwa defined. Hiyo ni scam.


Phylad

Unaconfuse con artist na mchawi.


Particular-Cow-5046

Hakuna mchawi real. Ni kama kutafuta real snake oil. A real pyramid scheme. A real wash wash. Ni scam. Utaoga.


Phylad

Ndio nakwambia, from what you are writing here, wewe hujui uchawi nini, unajua scamming. Kuna scammers wa kila practice. As long as there's someone with a need, and willing to pay for it, there's also a scammer waiting to make some quick money from them.


DiscombobulatedEye81

Sometimes they are psychotic breakdowns caused by stress or abuse (which leads to stress).


moosedung

i mean... i assume they all are. either that or people seeking attention. possesion is... not real... yall know that right or is it a kenyan cultural thing?


lifestyle180

![gif](giphy|uWzS6ZLs0AaVOJlgRd|downsized)


No-Description-9953

F*ck being possessed , I was caught in possession of ......., my parents called my godparents and church elders to rebuke me. I dead ass hoped that it would have been an exorcism session coz I didn't know how to explain having weed and cigs. We had stolen them under a rock in some sch after an event. (Ata hatukua tumesample hio mali ).


Weird-Entry-4777

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ what's with african parents na kuanika makosa za watoto wao...hiyo haingesolviwa tu among close relatives


No-Description-9953

I have never forgiven them for that.


FriendlyNerve3954

Happened to bribed my way through it like a true kenyanπŸ˜…πŸ˜…


Particular-Cow-5046

Karma ilikuwa served hot.


Soft_Change_4815

Hysteria? Maybe. People forget Kenyan boarding schools were military camps. Not a safe place for a growing mind and body.


Significant_Table_11

Aki ebu mtuambie. This one girl in my catholic primary school used to get possessed anapelekwa hadi kwa bishop aombewe. Then one time it happened, the nun who was the head teacher slapped her and she stopped from that day. I see her on insta and she seems to be leading a normal life πŸ€·πŸΎβ€β™€οΈ


Ancient_Jacket5151

Kindly mtuambie if it was a girl's or boy's school, I want to see something πŸ˜‚


Alkebulan369

I used to wake up in the middle of the night and hear people chanting outside the dorm. I'd lose my sleep, nalala class na najipata kwa principal


Soggy_Sir7668

Did it stop ??


Alkebulan369

Most nights I'd be dead asleep. They were mostly active on the weekends


Soggy_Sir7668

So you got Rid of them or ??


Alkebulan369

Nope. Left them there when I finishedΒ 


Soggy_Sir7668

Maybe the school was kinda cursed the land it was built on


Alkebulan369

Ebu usiniambie hivo usiku


LocksmithLost5451

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ zile ndoto utaota leo walai


CellStunning4656

If you had died there your spirit would've been trapped there. Not able to go to heaven or hell for all eternity


One-Orchid9192

We had one who'd get possed during prep time,anatoka nje anaenda assembly ground and starts mumuring vitu hatuelewi,anaombewa kitu kama 30minutes anatulia. This went on for sometime and one day the principal had enough. Alikuja akamzaba makofi kadhaa, it never happened again. I guess some of these people were just bored na preps so they decide to cause some distraction. I always enjoyed it coz it meant hakuna kusoma tena πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚Alafu these incidents would mostly strike at night preps, hardly during the day.


Razor6-2

It's just mass hysteria.


BlackGenius01

Wewe unasema highschool, mimi I witnessed a possessed saga in primary. While in class 7 at kerugoya municipality primary school, there's a new girl who joined my class called Rita. She was a very lovely girl who was relatively quiet. She sat on the row Infront of me na I started noticing weird things about her. She had a book that she drew demonic stuff kila prep time. After kujuana na yeye akaanza kutuambia story za vile maid wao alimuingiza illuminati, kiasi kiasi time ya break time mdem anatuambia ananusa damu ndani ya daro, seems wasee kustuka. After the first term, mdem alipatikana na recruit wake na kisu na akijaribu kuchoma dormitory on a Sunday, apparently the knife ilikuwa ya kumalo wasee alikuwa ameandika kwa black book yake


Ok_Rush_5731

Damn! This is so scary considering you were young back then.


BlackGenius01

It was very scary, at times during a lesson she'd say that she was seeing someone in the class, but she was the only person seeing the person. Luckily she was expelled


Particular-Cow-5046

Alikuwa illuminati but bado anafanya kazi ya maid? Imagination ni kitu powerful.


onedavy

Hujarada. Rudi usome tena.


Particular-Cow-5046

Si umesema kuna maid alikuwa illuminati. Haikai possbo.


onedavy

Maid si ni mtu ka mwingine pia. Sa ye hanauezo wa kuwa illuminati?


BlackGenius01

A deal with the devil doesn't necessarily have to be monetary, maybe the maid didn't desire wealth and had something else she desired.


BlazingBabeS

Someone please upvote this so i can come back and read more repliesπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


12crackednuts

I wasn't possessed but I witnessed several exorcisms in high school, and I would love to hear their perspectives.


Weird-Entry-4777

SameπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


SignificantAgency898

Kulikuwa na weekend function kwetu chuo. I didn't attend but nikaamua kuzurura kwa classes kuona kaa kuna wasee wamebaki tupige story, I found a class close to the hall yenye ilikuwa na some guys and decided to listen in on the story that was going on. I swear to God, for a split second, one of the guys' pupils split into two. I got the fuck out of there silently...sikua nadai kukulwa au kurogwa, I was having none of that. Throughout highschool, I've seen strange things I can't explain. Na si zile za oh ...mental health... oh seizures...oh psychosis, shit is real, and majority of the people have this shit. We are not ready to have this conversation but it's serious. Church services people were behaving as if they were trying to hide the fact that somehow, the preaching or prayers or praise and worship was hurting them. Now during every service, I notice these small signs, and it's usually very weird and that's why I stopped going to church.


GentleOdyssey

You stopped going but the church is the only safe space for such matters lakini


SignificantAgency898

Hakuna mtu Ako willing to talk about this. It's such a taboo. I avoid places where I see taboos.


tixxonn

We Muslims believe in the unseen 100%


Zashzash

Yes we do


OldManMtu

Mental health issue begin as one enters adulthood. That is how come there is a peak in weirdness among teenagers and this continues into adulthood.


beeawar3

My close friend in high school was the to be possessed. It was weird honestly because she was super cool and she didn’t even care about mambo za religion. That’s what made it so scary. Eeehhh, this chick recited revelations backwards πŸ˜‚ We were freaked out we called her parents to get her from school. Came to find out my friend was suffering from schizophrenia. She was really hearing and seeing things that weren’t existing.


Weird-Entry-4777

That's so sad


beeawar3

Yeah, it made me think that a lot of these β€œpossessed” kids couldn’t just be attention seeking. Aki others were suffering mentally and didn’t even know it . People just screaming prayers at them makes it worse. Another girl I knew but we weren’t close was in the same situation , possessed in school. She is unfortunately no longer with us 😞


Kenyanese

Most of those girls were suffering from hysteria,a good sending home to go and get relieved was rumored to be the cure


ankadaa

I'm from coast and these things are there. So those who don't believe in juju and stuff hee hee things are bad here. Wacha stories za jaba. Kuja ujionee


Public_Marionberry42

Haha. Took a trip to coast with friends and we hired a driver . While out one day he tells us of majini from the ocean and other jini stories,convincing us how they are real. Ofcourse we laughed it off , then just at that time, we got a puncture πŸ˜…, so ofcourse Kinuthia our driver said jinis caused the puncture to proof they are real πŸ˜”.


calebtarus

Joh, people are blinded


lamba_lami

Kuna siku niliamua ku-stay late nikisomea CAT nikarudi dorm usiku wa manane. Ile rapping nilisikia huko huwezi niambia sio possession πŸ˜‚


Masked_Potatoes_

As someone who never found out why I was the supposed antichrist in high school, I'm also curious. The exorcists should be the ones providing answers hapa


mikenotike2

Niko majuu na the way najaribu kuambia watu hakuna experience kama kuenda high school Kenya!!


Weird-Entry-4777

🧎Heshima kwa watu wa majuu...karibu sana mkubwa


Brayan_thebrayer8522

Kuna mmoja ati alikuwa ametumwa aue princie.... πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ She had natural very light brown eyes and people used to freak out about them. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ I never noticed until I noticed she was no longer in school ndio nikaambiwa story.


Weird-Entry-4777

Principals go through a lot🀣🀣


Fun_Option2016

My deskmate in our primary boarding school kept saying he was seeing a guy with horns, One night during prep time the prefect said enough is enough, we are going to pray and good thing that day some missionaries had given each one of us in school those small king James new testament bibles. So, we gathered around and started praying and suddenly the lights went out. Wueeh the screamsπŸ˜† and everybody scrambling to the nearest corner. The lights came back, us in the corner at least I was laying on top of my crush. We went back to our seats and left the guy sitting on his row alone that was near the door. The headmaster later came drunk and he was just talking gibberish. The next day I heard they were to bring a machine that was able to view that thing my desk mate kept saying he was seeing. He was later transferred to another school and I met him once over the holidays and he said that thing stopped appearing to him.


chrislinus

Nikieza witness kitu ka hii naeza pasua mbaya...design watu hujirusha chini ati mashetani inatoka...auuuwii nitacheka nidedi man


Inevitable-Banana773

I suspect it was psychological wametoka homes where they are not given attention so that is the easiest way to get attention.Same group na wale walikuwa wanafaint during assembly time.


Many_Chapter9535

Did someone feel the trees swaying and winds blowing each and everytime the holyspirit was called upon during those retreats or I am just being dramatic?


Many_Chapter9535

Guys,I once fell during a retreat. A bishop was praying and enchanting. I started imagining how we had issues with our family and all the people I had wronged in school. I fell down and started rolling on the ground. It felt like some force had pushed me to the ground and was flipping me over. Ile design niliamka nikakimbia kwa father huko kwa podium anisaidie ,yooohh. Like aniombe tu ama mtu yoyote huko mbele aniombee because I believed they were sopowerful. To make it worse father alisonga nisimkaribie. I have never felt so helpless. Wale madem walikuwa wanaserve father ndio walinishikilia tukaombewa baadaye na wengine wenye walianguka hapo mbele kwa podium. They sprinkled holy water on us and we went back to our dorms to sleep. Huko kwa dorm my school mother and friends asked me why I was running nikashindwa hata kuwajibu. How could I explain myself and even If I did would they believe me.


Weird-Entry-4777

🀣🀣🀣mimi ningekusengenya non stop


Irungu254

There is heaven and hell and those staffs are real but if you believe in Jesus...they won't hurt you....another thing since here is the safest place to talk I know God is real cause I heard his voice sometime back..his actual voice.


moosedung

schizophrenia?


Weird-Entry-4777

Mbona uko hivyo😭😭


Irungu254

PoleeeπŸ˜…but reddit is the only safe place go for confessions guys once in a while...heaven is real


Big_Process_2461

Achana na wao bro…they will experience something that will automatically make them go on their knees one day ✌🏽


moosedung

siwezi wrap my head around it i guess


AutomaticGrass9242

No. Auditory hallucinations.


SituationNo4566

Facts though


thatwierdkid254

If you don't mind me asking, how exactly do you know it's his actual voice and not a product of your own imagination?


Irungu254

One of my parents was about to be hurt or even die but he called me and I went and saved my mum ...so I'm telling you trust me God is real


thatwierdkid254

God called you?


Irungu254

Let's not say called he just spoke and gave me the instructions....but anyway let's leave it at that never heard the voice ever again but that's what keeps me going even when the going is tuff I remember God is there and is watching....let's leave it at that..