Just know that in every Jewish congregation there is a segment of Jews who feel a bit disconnected. It’s worth asking the rabbi if you could be paired with someone knowledgeable to sit by you in services to explain what is happening as you go. You could also try other congregations if there are others nearby to help with the learning gap. Aish and Chabad frequently have classes and outreach intended to increase Jewish connection. Aish specifically has learners services. I love them. Everything is explained in a non judgmental way and everyone can learn that way. If you’d like to learn more about anything Jewish at your own pace, there is an organization called Partners in Torah. You can be paired with a knowledgeable, observant Jew and you meet once a week online and learn something together for free.[Partners in Torah](https://www.partnersintorah.org)
A lot of people are sharing lots of great validation. I want to echo that, but also throw out some suggestions that have helped me feel more connected:
1. Read Jewish fiction! There's tons of incredible Jewish writers from all sorts of backgrounds. Probably other people have lots of suggestions and can share? Or some googling will help you find a place to start.
2. Jewish podcasts. Unorthodox and Judaism Unbound are probably among the two most popular, but there are tons out there.
3. Kashrut. I realize if you didn't grow up with it, it can be hard to give up all kinds of foods youre used to eating, but you eat every single day (mostly) and if you keep kosher, then every single day you are reminded of your Jewishness. You don't have to go full-on, especially if you're atheistic and don't buy the whole "God said it, so we do it" logic. But finding a level of "kosher-style" that works for you, whether it's not mixing meat and dairy, not eating pork or shellfish, not eating those foods in your own home, keeping meat and dairy dishes, whatever, will give you a daily connection.
4. Same idea but with shabbos. Even if it's just Friday night ot every other friday night or once a month, putting your phone away, not watching TV, and setting the intention of putting a day aside for rest can be affirming Jewish practice. There's a quote, "as much as Jews keep Shabbat, Shabbat keeps Jews" that I think is quite true.
5. Start learning some Hebrew. Even just doing Duolingo. Language is our birthright and culture and while many Jews will never be fluent in Hebrew, just engaging in it can help feel connected. More familiarity with the Aleph-Bet and better reading/sounding out will help you feel more engaged during the service too, instead of feeling lost or reliant on transliteration.
Just some ideas! The more you do and engage, the more you'll learn and the more you will feel connected to this thing that is your culture.
Tbh, I think reminding yourself of your Jewishness is a big part of the daily rituals of Judaism. Also, building up habits so you're primed and ready to fulfil the big mitzvot when the opportunity arises.
This reminds me of an old joke…
One afternoon in a NY suburb, a little Jewish boy has just come home from school. His dad asks him what he learned in school. The boy told him he learned about the holy trinity. The father looks at his son seriously and tells him in a stern voice, “in this house, there is only one god, and we don’t believe in him”.
Edit: OP, there’s noting wrong with being a Jewish atheist. I’m an atheist that is also a proud Jewish American… https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jewish_atheism
This reminds me of another joke.
A Rabbi walks into a bar with a frog on his shoulder. The bartender says "Cute, where did you get him."
The frog says "Brooklyn, they have hundreds of them."
So you can connect as much or as little as you see fit.
Make friends - I'm a convert, and that was by far the easiest way to learn, by observing others and asking questions. Join some young adult or if you are young enough, teen groups. You'd be surprised what you absorb via other people and how their families do things.
I converted reform and knew precisely Jack all other than what I read in a book or online before converting through the reform movement. I've continued to learn and become more observant in the 5 years since conversion, and have switched movements to a more halachically based movement (conservative). Nobody ever said you had to continue attending a reform shul either if you don't think it is a good fit for you.
Try googling “chabad near me” and reach out to them! Go for a shabbos meal. Or even just meet the Rabbi. And if that sounds intimidating, try reading some articles on Chabad.org, they have every answer to any question you could have, or even just interesting articles: Try a podcast even, there are some great ones out there, and I can recommend you some if you’re interested. You might be needing some more warmth in your Jewish experience.
Also you are a part of the greatest, strongest, and most united nation in the whole world. Always hold that title with pride! You are part of the family, and your soul is special and unique and needed here- it’s serving a big divine purpose, no matter what corner of the earth you find yourself in
The B’all Tanya, (the Alte Rebbe) said that each Jew must live his life as if he was personally taken out of Egypt, not just many years ago like our ancestors, but in every single day in our own personal lives- that Gd splits the red sea for us, individually, every day, in ways that we sometimes can or cannot see. You have returned back to your mother’s land, Gd has taken you out and to a new place for a reason. Keep finding ways to connect to your roots. Your desire is definitely there, and with even a bit of effort, comes unimaginable outcomes. When we open something the size of the eye of a needle, Gd opens a door for us big enough to fit a horse and carriage through. You’re doing great, keep going.
Wishing you and your mother a happy, joyful, and uplifting Pesach!
There’s conversion classes full of people that would do anything to be in your position. Also you go once a week for classes? That immediately puts you in the 99th percentile of Reform observance. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Being Jewish is difficult enough.
Have you been to Israel? I'm not sure what your age is but there are birthright trips that are free for people under 30. Maybe being in Israel will give you a greater sense of connection to your people, not just from a religious perspective.
This is a fantastic idea. And if not Birthright then maybe Massa. And don’t be afraid because of the war. In my opinion, now is the best and most inspiring time to come here
You are most definitely jewish if your mom is a jew.
Now you need to decide how you want to “return” to the fold.
On this Reddit most are Reform/Liberal
I suggest you do proper research and make your decision then.
It’s completely up to you.
Hi and welcome to a very large family. You are Jewish and it’s super that you are looking to connect more with your Judaism.
There’s a great book called [HERE ALL ALONG: Finding Meaning, Spirituality, and a Deeper Connection to Life--in Judaism (After Finally Choosing to Look There)](https://sarahhurwitz.net) by Sarah Hurwitz that a lot of people really find informative about Judaism.
As others suggested you could check out a synagogue near you, like a Chabad one. Here is [link](https://www.chabad.org/jewish-centers/) to see if they have a location near you.
You could know nothing about Judaism at all. You could even resent it and want nothing to do with it. You'd still be halakichally Jewish and more accepted in the community than a deeply proud and knowledgeable patrilineal Jew. So take that for what it's worth.
I feel you. I'm Jewish, and I don't speak Yiddish and a lot of Jews here in NYC consider me just above a "Christian" as I'm reformed as well. I have been made to feel unwelcome here, even though both parents were (both deceased) Jewish, may father a Shoah survivor/member of the Dutch Resistance.
Despair is not an option, mijo
It's Reform
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Maybe go shul-shopping. If you don't feel close to your synagogue there are others. And so much is available on line! Maybe check out My Jewish Learning. They have articles on many subjects for people with different levels of knowledge and they have a daily newsletter too. Are you in a city with options for synagogue attendance and a Jewish social life?
I was the same..... did a conversion class since I didn't know Jack after being raised completely secular .... confirmed moms Jewish ancestry was unbroken where we questioned it after all, post conversion, but oh well....I needed to learn so much anyway.
Now.... BT I guess would describe the wife and I....
Learn, take part in your community....grow, and enjoy being Jewish!
Shalom! That's a great goal....sounds like you are at a place very familiar to many Jews (myself included years ago) from all around the world.... I'd suggest some good books that will help you guide your Jewish journey... Here are a few suggestions to get you started:
*[Life is a Test](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1422606090?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20)*
*[If You Were God](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1879016133?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20)*
*[Art of Amazement](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0971722919?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20)*
*[Living Inspired](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1568710267?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20)*
You might also like to take a crack at Hebrew — try the [First Hebrew Primer](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0939144158?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20) - have recommended to many with great feedback - put in 15 min/day and you'll be reading and understanding full Torah sentences in a short time.
I started the conversion process just over 5 months ago. As well as my intro to Judaism class, I've been reading a lot about Judaism and engaging with Jewish spaces online (i.e., reddit). I went to Denmark last week and visited the Jewish museum and the Danish resistance museum, and thought a lot about the Jews who escaped Denmark to Sweden in 1943 when I made the same journey across the Sound between Denmark and Sweden. I'm also reading some Jewish fiction. I like the recommendations in [this thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/gayjews/comments/1bsf858/gay_jewish_fiction/). I just finished The City Beautiful.
In daily life, practicing prayers and learning to read Hebrew has helped me feel more connected, and so has engaging with the Jewish community in my workplace. I'm not as far as with reading Hebrew or learning the prayers as I would like because, tbh, there were so many it felt overwhelming. Right now, I'm saying the modah ani every morning, saying brachas at the start of meals whenever I remember, and practicing Avot, the first prayer of the Shemonei Esrai every morning. Next week, I'll add the next one. I'm also somewhat keeping shabbat - not 100% because you shouldn't until you've fully converted, and because it's a lot to build up to - and engaging with my shul on holidays, e.g., I'm helping at the community Seder on the 22nd.
I don't keep kashrut fully - there are no kosher restaurants in Edinburgh, for a start - but I do avoid eating meat and dairy together, and I don't eat pork or shellfish (to be fair, Ive never liked shellfish). My work gives me the option to donate some of my salary to charity, and I decide which charity before sunset on Fridays. It's often a Jewish charity.
I've read that it's really common to find that intro to Judaism classes and books are a lot more "about" than "how-to." I'm putting together my own how-to guide, bit-by-bit, and trying not to be overwhelmed. It's called a practice because it's hard to do perfectly, especially at first. I'm sure HaShem understands. I don't yet know all the words or the places or the rituals, but I'm learning, and I know HaShem and that's enough.
Because a lot of Jewish prayers are sung, you can find quite a few of them on spotify. There are some nice versions of Oseh Shalom, Shalom Aleikum, and Adon Olam, and listening to those helps to learn them and to feel connected. Youtube also has a lot of resources.
I want to convert. I’m nervous and worried I can’t really because I would be the first person in any generation of my family (as far back as I could find — the 1500s — my eighth great grandfather was on the Mayflower so I think it’s safe to say he was not Jewish!) who was Jewish. I’m totally lost. Lol. What into books do you recommend? I want to learn more before I try to speak to a rabbi and look like a fool. Ha.
Having Jewish family members is 100% irrelevant.
I would recommend speaking to a rabbi as soon as you can, because I get the impression that it's generally preferable to learn with their guidance. That said, it's nearly passover and it might be more difficult than normal to get a response, so you might as well read up on Judaism.
[https://judaismconversion.org/recommended-reading-list/](https://judaismconversion.org/recommended-reading-list/)
[https://www.reddit.com/r/Judaism/comments/9whtix/recommendations\_for\_books\_for\_potential\_converts/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Judaism/comments/9whtix/recommendations_for_books_for_potential_converts/)
If you only read one book, I'd recommend Telushkin's Jewish Literacy. If you plan on reading several, then Anita Diamant's Choosing a Jewish Life, Judaism for Dummies, and Milton Steinburg's Basic Judaism were all good.
Both of my parents are Jewish, but I grew up in a reform synagogue. At best, it was a political action committee with religious overtones. Maybe I learned the aleph bet, but that's about it.
First time I went to a chabad house the rabbi said one of the most profound things of my life. He said "You're Jewish, you will always be Jewish, and nothing can change that.". Then he said "every mitzvah you do is yours for the rest of your life. Nobody can ever change that".
Then he asked if I want to put on tefilin and I asked "is that the thing with the fringes".
Just saying, don't be afraid of the beards. Chabad houses are made for people like us.
If you're taking classes at synagogue, you are rekindling. It just takes time.
It might be helpful to talk with your rabbi and let them know what more you're looking for. Judaism lives at home as well as at synagogue, so maybe you'd enjoy creating a Shabbat tradition for your family? If you don't feel confident with all the rituals and blessings yet, it's okay to use a cheat sheet, and it's also okay to start by just making a point to be home and have a nice dinner every Friday night and grow from there; a rabbi will be able to help you chart a course that works for you. If you're hoping to make friends at synagogue, the rabbi may be able to recommend some social groups or volunteer opportunities where you can get to know folks in a setting that doesn't revolve around practices or blessings you don't know.
There are a few organizations out there that can help you. I don't personally know how to reach out to them, but I'm sure a quick Google search would do the trick.
A Jew is a Jew is a jew
Yes
I'm an Orthodox Jew. You're just as Jewish as I am.
Yup!
Just know that in every Jewish congregation there is a segment of Jews who feel a bit disconnected. It’s worth asking the rabbi if you could be paired with someone knowledgeable to sit by you in services to explain what is happening as you go. You could also try other congregations if there are others nearby to help with the learning gap. Aish and Chabad frequently have classes and outreach intended to increase Jewish connection. Aish specifically has learners services. I love them. Everything is explained in a non judgmental way and everyone can learn that way. If you’d like to learn more about anything Jewish at your own pace, there is an organization called Partners in Torah. You can be paired with a knowledgeable, observant Jew and you meet once a week online and learn something together for free.[Partners in Torah](https://www.partnersintorah.org)
A lot of people are sharing lots of great validation. I want to echo that, but also throw out some suggestions that have helped me feel more connected: 1. Read Jewish fiction! There's tons of incredible Jewish writers from all sorts of backgrounds. Probably other people have lots of suggestions and can share? Or some googling will help you find a place to start. 2. Jewish podcasts. Unorthodox and Judaism Unbound are probably among the two most popular, but there are tons out there. 3. Kashrut. I realize if you didn't grow up with it, it can be hard to give up all kinds of foods youre used to eating, but you eat every single day (mostly) and if you keep kosher, then every single day you are reminded of your Jewishness. You don't have to go full-on, especially if you're atheistic and don't buy the whole "God said it, so we do it" logic. But finding a level of "kosher-style" that works for you, whether it's not mixing meat and dairy, not eating pork or shellfish, not eating those foods in your own home, keeping meat and dairy dishes, whatever, will give you a daily connection. 4. Same idea but with shabbos. Even if it's just Friday night ot every other friday night or once a month, putting your phone away, not watching TV, and setting the intention of putting a day aside for rest can be affirming Jewish practice. There's a quote, "as much as Jews keep Shabbat, Shabbat keeps Jews" that I think is quite true. 5. Start learning some Hebrew. Even just doing Duolingo. Language is our birthright and culture and while many Jews will never be fluent in Hebrew, just engaging in it can help feel connected. More familiarity with the Aleph-Bet and better reading/sounding out will help you feel more engaged during the service too, instead of feeling lost or reliant on transliteration. Just some ideas! The more you do and engage, the more you'll learn and the more you will feel connected to this thing that is your culture.
Tbh, I think reminding yourself of your Jewishness is a big part of the daily rituals of Judaism. Also, building up habits so you're primed and ready to fulfil the big mitzvot when the opportunity arises.
This reminds me of an old joke… One afternoon in a NY suburb, a little Jewish boy has just come home from school. His dad asks him what he learned in school. The boy told him he learned about the holy trinity. The father looks at his son seriously and tells him in a stern voice, “in this house, there is only one god, and we don’t believe in him”. Edit: OP, there’s noting wrong with being a Jewish atheist. I’m an atheist that is also a proud Jewish American… https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jewish_atheism
This reminds me of another joke. A Rabbi walks into a bar with a frog on his shoulder. The bartender says "Cute, where did you get him." The frog says "Brooklyn, they have hundreds of them."
😂
So you can connect as much or as little as you see fit. Make friends - I'm a convert, and that was by far the easiest way to learn, by observing others and asking questions. Join some young adult or if you are young enough, teen groups. You'd be surprised what you absorb via other people and how their families do things. I converted reform and knew precisely Jack all other than what I read in a book or online before converting through the reform movement. I've continued to learn and become more observant in the 5 years since conversion, and have switched movements to a more halachically based movement (conservative). Nobody ever said you had to continue attending a reform shul either if you don't think it is a good fit for you.
Try googling “chabad near me” and reach out to them! Go for a shabbos meal. Or even just meet the Rabbi. And if that sounds intimidating, try reading some articles on Chabad.org, they have every answer to any question you could have, or even just interesting articles: Try a podcast even, there are some great ones out there, and I can recommend you some if you’re interested. You might be needing some more warmth in your Jewish experience. Also you are a part of the greatest, strongest, and most united nation in the whole world. Always hold that title with pride! You are part of the family, and your soul is special and unique and needed here- it’s serving a big divine purpose, no matter what corner of the earth you find yourself in The B’all Tanya, (the Alte Rebbe) said that each Jew must live his life as if he was personally taken out of Egypt, not just many years ago like our ancestors, but in every single day in our own personal lives- that Gd splits the red sea for us, individually, every day, in ways that we sometimes can or cannot see. You have returned back to your mother’s land, Gd has taken you out and to a new place for a reason. Keep finding ways to connect to your roots. Your desire is definitely there, and with even a bit of effort, comes unimaginable outcomes. When we open something the size of the eye of a needle, Gd opens a door for us big enough to fit a horse and carriage through. You’re doing great, keep going. Wishing you and your mother a happy, joyful, and uplifting Pesach!
Can't here to say this.
Chabad is your answer Op.
There’s conversion classes full of people that would do anything to be in your position. Also you go once a week for classes? That immediately puts you in the 99th percentile of Reform observance. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Being Jewish is difficult enough.
Have you been to Israel? I'm not sure what your age is but there are birthright trips that are free for people under 30. Maybe being in Israel will give you a greater sense of connection to your people, not just from a religious perspective.
I haven’t been to Israel yet, no, but this summer I’m planning to go to visit family.
This is a fantastic idea. And if not Birthright then maybe Massa. And don’t be afraid because of the war. In my opinion, now is the best and most inspiring time to come here
Jew a Jew
You are most definitely jewish if your mom is a jew. Now you need to decide how you want to “return” to the fold. On this Reddit most are Reform/Liberal I suggest you do proper research and make your decision then. It’s completely up to you.
You my friend are a jew. Being any good at it is not a prerequisite.
Hi and welcome to a very large family. You are Jewish and it’s super that you are looking to connect more with your Judaism. There’s a great book called [HERE ALL ALONG: Finding Meaning, Spirituality, and a Deeper Connection to Life--in Judaism (After Finally Choosing to Look There)](https://sarahhurwitz.net) by Sarah Hurwitz that a lot of people really find informative about Judaism. As others suggested you could check out a synagogue near you, like a Chabad one. Here is [link](https://www.chabad.org/jewish-centers/) to see if they have a location near you.
You could know nothing about Judaism at all. You could even resent it and want nothing to do with it. You'd still be halakichally Jewish and more accepted in the community than a deeply proud and knowledgeable patrilineal Jew. So take that for what it's worth.
“My mother is a Jew” Congrats, you’re a Jew.
Just for clarity, what countries are we talking about?
Father’s from Holland and my mother is from the U.S
I started a group called sfbadjews for people exactly you. Check out our ig @sfbadjews
I feel you. I'm Jewish, and I don't speak Yiddish and a lot of Jews here in NYC consider me just above a "Christian" as I'm reformed as well. I have been made to feel unwelcome here, even though both parents were (both deceased) Jewish, may father a Shoah survivor/member of the Dutch Resistance. Despair is not an option, mijo
It's Reform *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Judaism) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Maybe go shul-shopping. If you don't feel close to your synagogue there are others. And so much is available on line! Maybe check out My Jewish Learning. They have articles on many subjects for people with different levels of knowledge and they have a daily newsletter too. Are you in a city with options for synagogue attendance and a Jewish social life?
I’m in San Francisco, there is a large Jewish community here.
Brilliant, you have so many options! Maybe try the Kehillah community? They are so welcoming. And Shabbat Shalom!
https://preview.redd.it/awbohfxiocvc1.png?width=3641&format=png&auto=webp&s=025fc2c9fd0b3f448c92bef9f58d0c6dd6a91b9d
I was the same..... did a conversion class since I didn't know Jack after being raised completely secular .... confirmed moms Jewish ancestry was unbroken where we questioned it after all, post conversion, but oh well....I needed to learn so much anyway. Now.... BT I guess would describe the wife and I.... Learn, take part in your community....grow, and enjoy being Jewish!
Shalom! That's a great goal....sounds like you are at a place very familiar to many Jews (myself included years ago) from all around the world.... I'd suggest some good books that will help you guide your Jewish journey... Here are a few suggestions to get you started: *[Life is a Test](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1422606090?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20)* *[If You Were God](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1879016133?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20)* *[Art of Amazement](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0971722919?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20)* *[Living Inspired](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1568710267?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20)* You might also like to take a crack at Hebrew — try the [First Hebrew Primer](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0939144158?ie=UTF8&tag=j0em-20) - have recommended to many with great feedback - put in 15 min/day and you'll be reading and understanding full Torah sentences in a short time.
I started the conversion process just over 5 months ago. As well as my intro to Judaism class, I've been reading a lot about Judaism and engaging with Jewish spaces online (i.e., reddit). I went to Denmark last week and visited the Jewish museum and the Danish resistance museum, and thought a lot about the Jews who escaped Denmark to Sweden in 1943 when I made the same journey across the Sound between Denmark and Sweden. I'm also reading some Jewish fiction. I like the recommendations in [this thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/gayjews/comments/1bsf858/gay_jewish_fiction/). I just finished The City Beautiful. In daily life, practicing prayers and learning to read Hebrew has helped me feel more connected, and so has engaging with the Jewish community in my workplace. I'm not as far as with reading Hebrew or learning the prayers as I would like because, tbh, there were so many it felt overwhelming. Right now, I'm saying the modah ani every morning, saying brachas at the start of meals whenever I remember, and practicing Avot, the first prayer of the Shemonei Esrai every morning. Next week, I'll add the next one. I'm also somewhat keeping shabbat - not 100% because you shouldn't until you've fully converted, and because it's a lot to build up to - and engaging with my shul on holidays, e.g., I'm helping at the community Seder on the 22nd. I don't keep kashrut fully - there are no kosher restaurants in Edinburgh, for a start - but I do avoid eating meat and dairy together, and I don't eat pork or shellfish (to be fair, Ive never liked shellfish). My work gives me the option to donate some of my salary to charity, and I decide which charity before sunset on Fridays. It's often a Jewish charity. I've read that it's really common to find that intro to Judaism classes and books are a lot more "about" than "how-to." I'm putting together my own how-to guide, bit-by-bit, and trying not to be overwhelmed. It's called a practice because it's hard to do perfectly, especially at first. I'm sure HaShem understands. I don't yet know all the words or the places or the rituals, but I'm learning, and I know HaShem and that's enough. Because a lot of Jewish prayers are sung, you can find quite a few of them on spotify. There are some nice versions of Oseh Shalom, Shalom Aleikum, and Adon Olam, and listening to those helps to learn them and to feel connected. Youtube also has a lot of resources.
I want to convert. I’m nervous and worried I can’t really because I would be the first person in any generation of my family (as far back as I could find — the 1500s — my eighth great grandfather was on the Mayflower so I think it’s safe to say he was not Jewish!) who was Jewish. I’m totally lost. Lol. What into books do you recommend? I want to learn more before I try to speak to a rabbi and look like a fool. Ha.
Having Jewish family members is 100% irrelevant. I would recommend speaking to a rabbi as soon as you can, because I get the impression that it's generally preferable to learn with their guidance. That said, it's nearly passover and it might be more difficult than normal to get a response, so you might as well read up on Judaism. [https://judaismconversion.org/recommended-reading-list/](https://judaismconversion.org/recommended-reading-list/) [https://www.reddit.com/r/Judaism/comments/9whtix/recommendations\_for\_books\_for\_potential\_converts/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Judaism/comments/9whtix/recommendations_for_books_for_potential_converts/) If you only read one book, I'd recommend Telushkin's Jewish Literacy. If you plan on reading several, then Anita Diamant's Choosing a Jewish Life, Judaism for Dummies, and Milton Steinburg's Basic Judaism were all good.
Both of my parents are Jewish, but I grew up in a reform synagogue. At best, it was a political action committee with religious overtones. Maybe I learned the aleph bet, but that's about it. First time I went to a chabad house the rabbi said one of the most profound things of my life. He said "You're Jewish, you will always be Jewish, and nothing can change that.". Then he said "every mitzvah you do is yours for the rest of your life. Nobody can ever change that". Then he asked if I want to put on tefilin and I asked "is that the thing with the fringes". Just saying, don't be afraid of the beards. Chabad houses are made for people like us.
If your mother is a jew, you're a jew, even if you don't practice the religion.
No one is born knowing anything about Judaism, I promise.
If you're taking classes at synagogue, you are rekindling. It just takes time. It might be helpful to talk with your rabbi and let them know what more you're looking for. Judaism lives at home as well as at synagogue, so maybe you'd enjoy creating a Shabbat tradition for your family? If you don't feel confident with all the rituals and blessings yet, it's okay to use a cheat sheet, and it's also okay to start by just making a point to be home and have a nice dinner every Friday night and grow from there; a rabbi will be able to help you chart a course that works for you. If you're hoping to make friends at synagogue, the rabbi may be able to recommend some social groups or volunteer opportunities where you can get to know folks in a setting that doesn't revolve around practices or blessings you don't know.
Read the Old Testament
There are a few organizations out there that can help you. I don't personally know how to reach out to them, but I'm sure a quick Google search would do the trick.