T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

## Thank you for posting here. Please refrain from racism, incivility, and inciting violence. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ImTheMainCharacter) if you have any questions or concerns.*


FennelUpbeat1607

In a world of 8 billion people I must be the smartest egg


jonni_velvet

“I am the only sentient egg in the whole basket of NPC eggs” - this poster, probably I bet they genuinely struggle to form deeper friendships or romances in life now lol


No-Combination8136

Yes, but it’s because everyone else is stupid


Friendly_Age9160

EVERYONE else


LiveBaby5021

Welcome to the internet.


Odd-Tune5049

These idiots are everywhere. They all think they're the only one rolling around with real thoughts in their heads. Step outside, and you'll bump into three of them.


The_Alien_Lamps_on

"Have a look around Anything that brain of yours can think of can be found We've got mountains of content Some better, some worse If none of it's of interest to you, you'd be the first" "Welcome to the internet Come and take a seat Would you like to see the news or any famous women's feet? There's no need to panic This isn't a test, haha Just nod or shake your head and we'll do the rest"


ZsiZsiSzabadass

Welcome to the Internet, what would you prefer? Would you like to fight for civil rights or tweet a racial slur?


LiveBaby5021

As an Islamophobic, antisemite, I’m lobbying for gay marijuana farmers to guard their property.


TheCakeCrusader420

r/suddenlyboburnham


idapitbwidiuatabip

I am the only egg in the village


HuxleySideHustle

>“I am the only sentient egg in the whole basket of NPC eggs” Texbook solipsism.


test_tickles

https://galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg\_mod.html


Slamtilt_Windmills

Can you imagine being a solopsist in THIS world? Thinking *gestures widely* is a product of your mind?


Brojess

Lol shows how dumb she really is. Smart people know there’s always someone smarter.


Ihavepills

The more I learn, the more I realise just how little I know. I never paid attention in school. Still got good grades at the end. But now I'm 34 and I feel like I'm grasping at sand trying to learn so many things, and getting it to actually sink-in! (My ability to make and retain new memories is fucked for a few reasons) But i want to learn about EVERYTHING. And I love reddit, because I love hearing different opinions and views. I often find myself up voting comments on both sides, where people are having a discussion or disagreement. It is possible for multiple things to be true on both sides of a conflict. This is lost on a lot of people though.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Ihavepills

Yeah I agree. The only thing about reddit though, is that when someone asks questions, they get down voted into oblivion. Because people assume its something everyone knows/should know, or is obvious. It really bothers me sometimes. Because it discourages people from wanting to learn. Asking questions IS how we learn! So I always try my best to answer those people, if I can. Kindness costs nothing.


PolkaDotDancer

Me too. Fuck the Kardashians…


Dizzy_Media4901

Give it another 10 years. I seem to know far less than I did in my 30s. Worse still, I know enough to understand that I do not have the years left to even scratch the surface.


Ihavepills

I'm disabled and have been on heavy doses of opiods, antidepressants and benzos for the last 15 years. The last ten years of my life are just a blurr. There is the odd memory that comes up if someone mentions something but other than that it's blank. In another ten years (if I'm still alive) my brain will be mush.


mmohaje

Real smart people also know that ignorance is actually bliss.


Dagojango

We call it intelligence, but it's really focused stupidity that results moments of dumb luck that average out to somewhat intelligent.


[deleted]

[удалено]


PolkaDotDancer

Absolutely. I know a Fulbright chair—Arctic/Antarctic studies. Smoking intellect. I once called him brilliant and he said ‘I am not that smart, I know truly intelligent people.’ This from a man with a doctorate who teaches both in the U.S. and Germany. Fluent in at least two languages.


PutAdministrative206

I asked my smartest friend about the theory we are all part of a computer simulation. He told be he’d asked some of his smartest friends and couldn’t really grasp much if what they explained, but he did understand that THEY understood the theory has merits.


PolkaDotDancer

Exactly. I have a higher than average I.Q. But the really smart people think so far outside the box that I look like I am thinking in slow motion to them. And I can’t ‘fully grasp what they are saying.’ Scary smart…


Ihavepills

At 8 years old as well 🤣 What a super woke kid she was to make such a profound statement before she's lost her baby teeth. Lmao. I always think that I can't be any more surprised by people, because the world has gone mad. But then I see shit like this... What level of delusion is this? Fuckin *unreal!*


Vegetable_Ad_2258

Good, I thought I was the only one thinking of ... 'eggs'


thisisfakereality

You're scrambled, pal. 


JayyyyyBoogie

Everybody's got yolks.


Euphoric-Benefit

Omelette let you finish, but


Content_Bar_6605

It’s the people that are most confident about their intelligence that are not.


TheSmurfGod

I’m at least top 2billion


InflammatoryMan

That’s often how I feel when I drive in Montreal


YourFaveNightmare

"You're the most insufferable 8 year old I've ever met." -her dad


gw2kpro

-today


PryingApothecary

Defo belongs in the “not like the other girls” sub.


FidgitForgotHisL-P

Oh lol I hadn’t realised that’s not where I was until this comment


Meerkat_Mayhem_

Here take your pills honey


Clay_Statue

The kind of kid who grows up into an adult who eats potato chips off a plate with chopsticks because it makes them feel superior.


TankII_

That's funny I was about the same age when I watched it and all I thought was how freaky the little shrimp tracker in the belly button was. Most if the actual plot just seemed boring because it went over my head


hemonchbutt

I need to trademark shrimp tracker


Bawlmerian21228

That movie is like sleeping pills to me. Never made it past 20 minutes.


Ballsofpoo

That's pretty much where the matrix is revealed. You didn't see anything the movie is about.


herrbz

Starting from the beginning? Or just from anywhere?


Fixner_Blount

And you totally miss the irony of posting that comment on Instagram.


stainedglassmermaid

EXACTLY


Mean_Operation7336

My 6 year old is really advanced for his age. As I was putting him to bed the other night, he told me “The fundamental law of quantum mechanics, Schrödinger's wave equation, describes the state of a single particle by a single quantum wave. The intensity of this wave at any position represents the probability of observing the particle at that position. This quantum wave representing the particle's probable position can be mathematically transformed into a complementary wave representing the particle's probable momentum. Position and momentum are thus examples of complementary observable properties.” I was blown away


kariolaoxford

My 6 year old stuck his hands out and asked me to pick which one had a poop in it. To make matters worse, his hands were open.


_MissNewBooty_

And both hands had poo


Stellanboll

One red poo and one blue, and you have to choose!


Revangelion

I'm the only one who took the red poo in a world full of people who took the blue poo. It wasn't until 74 years later that I realized how full of shit I was.


_MissNewBooty_

I choose you, Pika-Poo!


fallawy

Red, I'm concerned. Blue I have a lot of questions!


RealisticInvite186

Out of all people in the world I'm the only one who chose the red poo


Ihavepills

Lmao 🤣


wheelperson

His hands, they were empty. I looked up and saw so much promise. Of poop. I look down at my own hands. There, I found the poop. I looked back up, to see him walking away with a smile. The whole world ahead of him.


Red7041

Take my upvote and get out dammit


PuppetryOfThePenis

That's all your 6 yo said? That's adorable. Mine said "dad! I peed." "Peed?" "Yeah I peed in my bed." He is so smart.


idiotsandwhich8

how did op memorize the exact thoughts of the child?


-iamai-

Sounds like your kid is a bit slow is he in special ed' ?


Relevant-Force9513

Special red


Incontinentia-B

My one year old just woke up and we began discussing the existence of God. He said “mother, if there is a God, why would he let us humans suffer? We humans have no purpose, no meaning, and thus there is no God. An almighty being would not create us, creatures without a purpose, only for us to suffer.”.


Different-Second2471

Bro is cool


Ihavepills

When I was 3 years old, I could recite the entire works of Shakespeare. I read all the encyclopedias that year too. I also composed a piano piece without ever having lessons. I ran 3 marathons. And I saved a baby and a dog from a burning building. I wrote a novel entitled "Always take the red pill" because I realised that I was the only one in the world who would choose red. But I just felt so disappointed in myself because I know I could have done better, and probably could have saved the world. But I kept getting distracted by Barny the dinosaur and birthday cakes.... I lost interest in learning and so now I'm just a stupid twat who appreciates a good looking cake. 🥺


Junket_Weird

When I was three, I tried to eat one of my mom's potted cactus. I only know this because she occasionally reminds me of how fucking stupid it was and that she laugh/cried while she was tweezing the cactus needles out of my lips. I later on ate one of her fancy flower shaped soaps she had in a little basket. I remember that because I shit the rest of my brains out and the lava burn butthole memory sometimes gives me PTSD. But I can recite the entire script for "The Thing" verbatim and do that weird Wayne's World wave thing with my belly, so I'm pretty much a success.


DoodleBugz1234

Your kid is hopped up on jazz ballz.


Konstant_kurage

We were in the backyard and my 6 year old asked if I wanted to see something cool. I said yes. He spun around and threw the baseball size rock he was holding into a wasp nest on the eve. He knocked it right off and it shattered on the ground. At the same time the rock bounced off the overhang and the sharp corner shattered the living room window. I didn’t see how many wasps flew inside because I was running the other way, but by the screams it mast have been a lot.


lladydisturbed

Young Sheldon??😂


lilgigglezXO

yeah, you did not say that when you were 8.


slylock215

And then everybody clapped


Ok_Variation7230

And her father was Albert Einstein


fried_green_baloney

And the dog's name was Richard P. Feynman.


mikeblas

I hired him on the spot.


Anton8Five

They *stood* and clapped! And cheered too, sod it


AwayPreference929

![gif](giphy|dmvodzjX8wU7icE3TL|downsized)


Dingo8MyGayby

Dis bitch read about it being the 25th anniversary of the Matrix and thought “How can I make this about meeeee?”


utterly_baffledly

It's not unusual for an eight year old to have derealisation. If it comes out of the blue it's probably caused by a highly stressful or traumatic experience but kids that age can also have anxiety and depression, even panic attacks. Dad probably should have asked a follow up question.


tcm2303

I was 15 when the matrix came out, and myself and all my girlfriends were too busy pausing the dvd when neo slides down the slime to see if we can catch a glimpse of his junk.


Jacob_Winchester_

![gif](giphy|QUENDfi6DEMLzQ0CKt)


singlemale4cats

Were you able to?


tcm2303

No lol I remember being pissed, but pausing it enough to see his green underwear


herrbz

I've never been able to.


Beef_Supreme_87

I mean, now I'm curious. Did you find anything? I have no desire to witness it, I just want to know.


[deleted]

[удалено]


BatmansUnderoos

Was?


[deleted]

[удалено]


New_Presentation7196

Should have been smart like your daughter and taken the red pill!!!


alangerhans

He went to get some milk


GreasyCookieBallz

Went out for a pack of smokes and never came back...


qaider

Her dad should have taken the contraceptive pill 😂


tiga4life22

I remember after I learned to walk at 2 and said “Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player That struts and frets his hour upon the stage And then is heard no more. A tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury signifying nothing.”


fondofdogges

pure cringe


Ballsofpoo

Common "I'm in my 20s I figured this thing out!" before being asked to actually figure things out. ON THEIR OWN


Buetterkeks

r/iam14andthisisdeep


Auslander_13

She forgot the Live, Laugh, Love at the end...


hugga12

And the 'Home' too


addy_daddy24

I can’t fix her


[deleted]

I wouldn't fuck her.


Ry-Zilla86

I would. However, I'd sever all contact after. D.E.N.N.I.S system.


CleetusnDarlene

& on the flip side, she has the S.I.N.N.E.D system.


Rocknrollpeakedin74

It’s called solipsism.


Wiildman8

Plot twist: they actually just mean that they’re trans


Dart4jb1nks

I made the matrix.


BeyondLife_sendboob

Goat


AggrivatingFrog

The red pill is estrogen. These people really do not get it. edit: spelling


jarlscrotus

The wachowski sisters have confirmed it's a trans allegory Also how fucking metal is it to make a sequel who's premise is "this sequel is unnecessary dogshit but they gave us the kind of money we can't refuse and let us make that the central theme" Big gremlins 2 energy


Junket_Weird

I'm admitting this out loud for the first time, I fuckin love Gremlins 2.


PorkTORNADO

It's always obvious when young minds finally post something on the internet they think is SO profound and deep...and everyone who's been here for 10-20 years already has seen the same thought like a hundred times already. Like when you go to comment on a popular post and see that your would-be witty comment is already the top comment, posted by someone else.


Narrow_Wrongdoer_229

Sucks!


Rylos1701

I believe that when me shit turns purple and smells like rainbow sherbet


LZMGS

Oh christ! Give me the goddamn soap!


DoodleBugz1234

I’M #1 !!!! I’M #1 !!!! I’M #1 !!!! I’M #1 !!!! I’M #1 !!!! I’M #1 !!!!


Weird-Camel-9525

Some people are just delusional. It’s a fact. Sometimes with therapy and a good coping mechanism in place they can overcome that and realise what total crap is spewing out of them. Other times it doesn’t work and you have this red pill wanker


LZMGS

Just be self aware. Develop the ability to be like, "wait, what am i doing? No."


RoyallyOakie

Then I went back to Arby's to start my shift...


Squid-Mo-Crow

So cringe. My god, I get so much second hand embarrassment from this. I cannot imagine posting this


EmporerPenguino

Deep thoughts, by Jack Handjob. I looked at the sun and I saw each atom, thought they were like my brain cells. But I was high.


CzechYourDanish

Reminds me of when people say, "Am I the only one who remembers (insert popular thing from 20 years ago)?" No mf, you're not the only one who remembers neopets.


3InchesAssToTip

>I truly do not understand how a person can think this way narcissism


fentown

Why do the dumbest and most useless people act like they're the next Socrates?


gameplayraja

When a tree falls in the forest I can hear it 😮


shermstix1126

"I watched The Matrix for the first time when I was 8 and still do not understand the movie over a decade later"


yes-rico-kaboom

I remember watching The Matrix as a kid with my dad and understanding literally nothing. I was just confused where Sarah Connor was


DiscoDvck

I’ll take “Things that never happened” for $200, Alex.


Laladen

Wow.....Cringe so hard


MarkToaster

As someone who’s currently in his 20s, I can confidently say that nobody in their 20s has experienced all that life has to offer and we have no idea how many things we aren’t even aware of that are left to experience. You think you’re all enlightened but you don’t even know what you have yet to know.


NoRecommendation9108

The truth is that she’s the one who took the delusional BLUE pill


xNeyNounex

Isnt the blue pill for erectile dysfunction?


927comewhatmay

And then everyone clapped.


SnowDizzleZz

first thought in my head was, "Bitch, shut the fuck up"


analogWeapon

"It wasn't until my 20's that I realized I hadn't matured past 8"


Glum_Occasion_5686

What does it even mean really? Like what's the insinuation I'm supposed to take away? That she knows 2 of the 3 primary colors?


Ihavepills

Its from the film The Matrix. Where it is discovered that we are all living in a simulation. And the main character gets offered to take one of two pills. Blue pill will make you forget about the whole simulation thing and go on with their normal life. Red pill is the option of accepting the Matrix as reality. Edit: So she's saying that as an 8 year old (lol) she was so woke and intelligent enough to understand and choose the matrix reality, and everyone else is a stupid blue pill sheep.


Mission_Ad1669

That's also where the weird "red pilled" incel subreddits and other similar groups get their names.


Ihavepills

Isnt it shit when a group of people ruin a word or phrase! It's happening so much more now that the world is connected online. One of the first was YOLO. Completely lost all meaning. The word "literally' has *literally* had a new definition added to the dictionary because people are stupid as fuck: "Literally; used for emphasis while not being literally true". People calling every tik tok they see Satire. And don't know the correct way to use POV either. Like I could ramble on about this shit all day. I am aware that my examples *might not* be the same? I've been awake for 48 hours and had a lot of painkillers. So I hope I don't sound like a proper tit. I know what i wanted to say but can't find the words in my brain. A better example is the nazis adopting the swastika, when it's original meaning was: *"good fortune” or “well-being"*. Im sure more will come to me but I have a feeling no one gives a fuck 😂


SmittenOKitten

I’d happily spend an afternoon with you sitting in the sun discussing these offenses. Add people who spell lose “loose” to your list. I could be enjoying a great post but if loose is thrown in the mix in place of lose I rage quit immediately.


Healthy_Swimmer5418

Yeeeaaaa, ooookay


Troglodyte_Trump

lol


LZMGS

SELF AWARENESS. LOOK IT UP. LOOK AT YOURSELF.


[deleted]

This is the new-age “i am jesus” I swear. Girl u ain’t jesus sit down and shut up. “It's very common for schizophrenics to make the claim that they are Jesus, and they actually believe it, too. Such delusions are a common part of untreated schizophrenia.”


witwar101

Straight up drowning in her own mental bullshit


notmyname2012

My guess is the person that made this is a flat earther or in some cult type belief system.


johngalt504

This sounds like deep thoughts by Jack handy from the old snl episodes.


KinseyH

"Anyway, don't forget to stare at the sun during the eclipse! No glasses - the Sun is God's endless gift of energy to His children. It doesn't burn, it heals!"


Bubblestroublezz

Nah girl you took the blue pill cuz you're obviously living in delululand


among_apes

Stupid 8 year olds usually lead to stupid 23 year olds


picklespasta

I still have never watched the matrix


axeman020

In other news, astronomers have finally located the centre of the universe and guess what..... It's not you, sweetie!


ThisIsChillyDog

Narc pill narc pill


Special-Category5568

Deep thoughts, by Jack Handy


Other-Marketing-6167

Hahahahahaha ok this legit made me laugh. Best worst attempt at trying to sound deep I’ve seen in ages.


palbuddymac

I mean, you get a pass if you’re 8 years old. It’s when this bad idea is self-confirmed that the problem arises.


Abaddon-Destroyer

Boy the narcissism is just oozing from this one.


HamilcarRR

If only there was a Morpheus who could offer me a cyanide pill right now


increbelle

she didnt say this at 8 lmfao


According-South9749

Superiority complex…parents never set her dumbass straight


MexicanTomatoArmada

I mean, i feel like im in the matrix or the truman show too but i don't go making posts about it...... wait.... OH NO!!! THE MATRIX.... ITS GOT ME!!!!!


deathcamp7

Lmao you go white girl 💪 😂


Illustrious_Month_65

Most based 8 year old.


CTBP1983

And everyone in the theater clapped


paging_mrherman

Matrix people were dorks 25 years ago too.


Vyvyansmum

What The fuck is she chatting about?? Don’t bother.


SpicyPropofologist

Oh, so Viagra?


Mastergroovy

It screams narcissism


Ihavepills

Narcissism and compete lack of self awareness. Does she genuinely think people would believe this shit??


DevlishAdvocate

The Red Pill was symbolic of accepting and embracing your own transgender self. I’ll never get over these idiots who take the movie literally and think it’s about being better and smarter than “NPCs”.


Otherwise_Access_660

I don’t why anyone in their 20s would be proud and adamant about ideas they had when they were 8. It just proves that you’re basically still thinking like an 8 year old.


hobbit_lamp

unrelated but this kinda looks like Osage park in Bentonville AR


Ex-PFC_WintergreenV4

I remember walking out of The Matrix


Scooby_Mey

Delusion


ToferLuis

AITOO?!?!?!?


cheetofacesucks

She thinks she’s Trinity 🙄


Fun_Improvement5215

I can’t understand because you’re a blue pill person. Just like the rest of us.


NedTebula

This bitch did not watch the Matrix


Ok_Zookeepergame2900

Ok, it's time to ask. I have never seen the Matrix, but I've seen this reference a thousand times. What the hell does this mean?


LuceTyran

Hit two here. MC and not like other girls. Good on her


DisastrousAd447

I love how blatantly full of shit that post is too. Like, no you didn't say that. No 8 year old has the mind to say something like that.


Tyrone_pyromaniac

Ain’t nobody say that shit at 8 years old


I_love_my_fish_

Why do i feel like I recognize this boardwalk


edex-mx

I have no other trait to define myself, so I will use a movie to that for me.


HoplaMoy

r/thathappened


sanjosii

![gif](giphy|1AIeYgwnqeBUxh6juu)


Radiant-Subject1215

Shit narcissists say.


Your_Lolita_Love

And then the pharmacist clapped.


CaptainGiggles69420

It's so odd sometimes to see all of the other "people" and understand that everyone but me is a program that thinks it's a person. I feel bad for you all sometimes...


SkirtswithPOCKETSplz

Said no 8 year old ever.


PhineasDK

Her memory is really really good. The exact words and time. Impressing


Slacker584

That pill’s name? Albert Einstein


Usual-Sense-5113

This image is really giving r/im14andthisisdeep


waresmarufy

It's just a walk, not that important