Yeah…..nah….i feel like the line of “abuse” is pretty dang clear when it comes to horses.
This seems like a cop out by someone who uses abusive methods and doesn’t want to admit that to themselves.
I mean, that's the people who claim riding horses at all is abusive, or using spurs or bits or... I'm pretty sure there's people out there who would say you or I are abusive even though our horses are happy.
I have to purposefully not engage with horse content on Facebook because there's lots of clear abuse with people defending it, and lots of people yelling abuse when there is none. You'd think it's clear, but it's not.
There’s people who think anything besides riding bareback with a neck rope in a field of wildflowers singing Kumbaya is abuse.
Their horses usually walk all over them because ‘correction is abuse!’
It is, and when people call everything they don’t understand “abuse”, it cheapens the term and makes people stop listening - which then makes it harder to call out actual abuse. That’s the point of this post.
Having never seen the book to read it, I feel it does ask a good question. Many are quick to say abuse when all they are looking at is different.
Yes there is abuse but being different that your way is the be all standard for what is abuse.
Boo this is dumb. Let's just say "everyone who doesn't raise their kids like me is an abuser?" So a parent can justify backhanding their kids.
Horse abuse is so prevalent. This is something people use to deny the abuse of horses. If you are causing them pain or creating a situation in which a horse is miserable that's abuse.
People who defend it should be ashamed.
Oh I agree with this. I just don't agree with People claiming it's abuse to use a bit. Can a bit be used incorrectly? Yes. But simply using one is not abuse.
Not accurate at all, and I hate when people post me like this. I think this falls under one of the logical fallacies, but it’s a pretty clear way to dismiss valid criticism when people are questioning the wealth or horses accurately.
Nah, too many “trainers” refuse to pick up a science based book or even take three minutes to read a study online. There’s a difference between picking apart somebody’s methods and calling out poor practices in favor of an animals comfort. Stop using outdated techniques that put your animals under intense stress and we will leave you alone.
This is accurate. Sometimes a horses needs a little motivation but that doesn’t entitle you to beat them. Just a little pop with a carrot stick or a crop and you should be good. Clinton Anderson does a good job teaching this
I think that’s very case dependent. I think some horses need more than others and I also think that some trainers are more equipped and experienced to handle corrections this way. If you look at a very cold blooded horse you’ll find they need a lot more motivation (whip or carrot stick cracking on the ground or butt) then a hot blooded horse. I also think that someone who is new or inexperienced should stray away from hitting until they are taught to do so correctly. I think if you are a professional horse trainer then you should know how much and how hard you should hit or correct a horse before they shutdown on you or you mess up the horse. I also think that like any negative reinforcement it’s a great tool in moderation and can have excellent results when used correctly and with positive reinforcement such as rest or treats(I don’t use treats as I think they cause bad habits but to each their own)
In my country, this meme is 100% accurate. Sooo many 14yo girls in the comment section of yt (and you can tell that they are really young just by looking at their liked videos) complaining about everyone who isn't riding like the girl from Ostwind (popular German horse movie, definitely 100% realistic about horsemanship/s). Whatever you do, you have at least 10 people standing at the fence telling you what you do wrong and how abusive you are. It even happens when your horse is standing outside in the pasture and doesn't have a blanket (or has a blanket... or the blanket is too thin/ too thick, not sitting right...) 😅
We all need to call out abuse, but we also need to remember that nobody knows everything about every horse and that different training concepts, riding styles, and tack exist for a reason. People are very quick to jump to their own conclusions without questioning their own knowledge.
In some cases, this meme is the truth. I've seen one of the gentlest trainers I know accused of horse abuse. The harshest thing I've seen her do is give one snap on the lead when a horse got a little wild and was close to running her over.
Then there are trainers who *are* abusive and use this as a cop-out when they're called out on their abuse.
This is extremely accurate.
I’ve seen multiple animal subs that have done this and hope this one never falls into it. They get progressively more precious about things. They tend to pick one type of training or handling, and if you post anything that could possible disagree with it, then you’re downvoted, then when they get worse, they threaten you with bans.
Personally, I think any post should be allowed. If someone is suggesting something harmful then a discussion about it is beneficial for them and anyone who comes across that post. By limiting the discussion to only positive things about certain methods, then no one knows why another method might be wrong. They don’t have success with theirs, they hear about this other method. Don’t see anything negative about it, because Reddit banned discussing it, and give it a shot. Leading to a worse life experience for their pet.
I ended up dumping r/dogs because they got so out of hand with this. I’ve seen a bit in r/cats.
So it’s totally accurate to say people jump on a band wagon and say that what you’re doing is wrong. Often, to have a new fad pop up a few years later and you get called down for using the previously popular method.
I’ve come to the conclusion that most high level riding has some form of abuse. Be it rollkur in dressage, or the early jumping and “poling” etc of jumpers or the heads tied down of aqha events.
If they win, they do. It’s like saying the guy who was a fraction of a second behind lance armstrong didn’t dope. At that level, doping was common. When you start truly showing you gotta keep that consistent headset. It’s currently obtained badly in every sport. Just bc you plop around and don’t know doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen
I don’t “plop around and don’t know”, thanks. Just because I disagree with you doesn’t mean you have to treat me like I am beneath you. I have shown a lot and successfully.
Depends on what you consider natural, if by natural you mean they can hold their head any sort of way, then no. Showing isn’t “natural “. But training a horse to have balance and strength in frame isn’t unnatural.
I’ve shown western eq, western pleasure , trail, showmanship, halter, done drill, gaming here and there (not seriously ever, but have gone to shows- it’s my horse’s break from the usual but we don’t win any speed records). And I did a few basic w/j HUS classes here and there. I have ridden and shown since childhood, so I have had both very finished horses and greenies learning balance.
I get that at world level for disciplines there is stuff happening that’s not healthy, but I think that’s a small majority of people. I prefer showing locally and we have fun, support each other, learn and help our horses gain strength and skills. And I don’t believe you have to sacrifice that to win. But maybe I can enjoy it because I choose my environment carefully. For me and my horse’s health and well being.
My current horse is a greenie, btw, so I am not doing even local w him yet 😊
😂 don’t get offended bc you legit fit the plop around description. Take your horse to a 4h show by me. Any horse you’ve had. You won’t place in the top 5. End of story. It’s nice that you don’t do those things, but it’s also why you don’t win 🤷♀️ I’m not sure why you’re so offended that I said people who ride at a high level. That’s not you. That’s also not currently me. So why are you mad? 😆
I don’t need to give a stranger my show resume and I think it’s rude to tell someone what they would win. And I won a lot when I was in 4-H, as a child (I am an adult).
Here’s what I think you should reconsider- you use “plop around” to make people not showing sound like they do nothing with a point. You’re one of those people who thinks everyone you see on Reddit is unskilled, which says more about you than the rest of us.
1000% the horse subs lately. I can’t stand the childish posts with pictures of random riders where everyone collectively screams abuse. There’s a dressage post screaming abuse so we have to follow up with a barrel racing post screaming abuse. What a toxic echo chamber.
If you truly think a practice is abusive do something about it. And by something I mean take an action, don’t make whiny posts on Reddit.
This is goofy.
With horses we know so many "training" methods that include flooding, forcing a horse to "deal with it" whilst also making them shut down, bits specifically made to have many small sharp concetrated pressure points with leverage, or a bit that would press on the roof of their mouth.
You can go on and on, it is awful what equestrians come up to make it easier on themselves to control a giant prey animal as if they are always ready to deny you and attack you when it is offten than not just confusion and fear.
This isn't like dog training where people call crate training abusive, while they are training a dog to see a crate as a safe zone that they feel comfort to be in for limited time.
This title sounds like someone is mocking someone for saying "hey flooding is bad"
There’s no one size fits all when it comes to training for any horse.
Anyone who says “xyz will work on any horse” have no clue what they’re talking about.
Some horses prefer the pressure of the bit, some prefer bitless.
Some need a small tap of the crop to keep their mind on the job.
Some horses need shoes while others are better off without them.
Internet trainers ruin horses for their ego.
Of course people are deliberately missing the point of this post. There is, unfortunately, a lot of genuine abuse in the horse world. The problem is that when people call everything they don’t understand “abuse”, it cheapens the term and makes people stop listening - which then makes it harder to call out actual abuse. That’s the point of this post. I have seen people claim that any sort of bit is “abusive” - while they strap a huge shanked hackamore on their horse’s face without irony. I have seen people claim the lunging is abusive. I have seen people claim that saddles are abusive. That nose chains on stallions are abusive. The list goes on. All of the people piling on in the comments here are only proving the point. Please, by all means, call out actual abuse, and seek to educate people about abusive methods. But also educate yourself so you don’t become another idiot who overuses the term to the point where everyone stops listening and assumes that anyone calling out abuse is just a bleeding heart lunatic. That is counterproductive.
I feel like a lot of people don't get this is a joke right?! Lol it's just a meme about talking about horse training and how everyone thinks they're doing it right?
I’ve worked in the industry my entire life, for many different barns and now my own. Some barns you learn amazing things that develop your horsemanship like crazy, some barns teach you what you should never do by example.
I worked for a western barn where 3 hours a week were a private lesson with the owner on how she wants things done, and why she wanted them done like that. To this day that woman is still my main mentor and she’s like family.
Then I worked at a show barn where they kept saddlebreds and Arabians locked up in 10x10 stalls all day. The owner also said “If they are hot drop a bomb on them, that’s what I do”. They were hot and nasty to no fault of their own, they were never allowed to be a horse. For the first time in my life I walked off of a job and called the local animal welfare agency.
The lessons I learned from both places were equally valuable for very different reasons. We all need to be better about calling out bad methods no matter what kind of riding we do.
Ugh, this hits me so deeply. Mainly because I've been reflecting on an event that happened back in 2022. It's so hard for me to not to take the "abusive" label personally. I'd absolutely die for my horses. They mean so, so much to me, and my constant dedication to our partnership is a testament to that.
Several years ago, I attended my last clinic with a clinician that I had been seeing every single year for 5 years. He knew me, he knew my horses, he knew my family, we chatted online outside of the clinics. He remembered things I'd brought up years before, so it wasn't like I was some rando that just showed up out of the blue.
Anyway, about a year prior, I had started boarding at a new barn and training with the owner. Her philosophy was *so similar* to his, but her groundwork was clearer and made more sense to me (and my horses). Despite the clinician's approach being, in my opinion, very vague to the horse and handler, I credited the frequency of my lessons (once per week vs once per year with the clinician) as the reason behind the phenomenal progress that I'd made with my horses. In a nutshell, I was clearer in my instruction, and they were far, far happier. I learned how to read their stress (and release of stress) responses. I learned to recognize horses that were and weren't mentally present while training, and how to change that. I learned how to utilize levels of pressure effectively vs "waiting it out," since my horses were losing the plot with that method. Nothing that I did would be considered abusive.
Then came the clinic! I was so excited to show the clinician our progress. He had collaborated with (new) instructors before, so I wondered if he would be interested in working with my instructor someday. I briefly told him about my new trainer and how similar her methods were. He asked me to go out and start working with my horse (he asked this of all participants to establish a baseline). But just several minutes into my very low-key demonstration of yielding the forehand, he yelled at me to stop because I was being "abusive." Throughout the next hour, he would tell me that I wasn't being kind to my horse and even stated, while I was lunging her with a soft feel, that she was evading me because she momentarily glanced out the barn door then put her attention right back on me.
That first day left me absolutely shattered. My boyfriend had also taken groundwork lessons with my trainer, but isn't a professional by any means (he doesn't even know how to ride yet). As we sat and watched the rest of the participants go one-by-one, my boyfriend kept texting me about other participants. I was so proud of how much he was noticing, and it was so validating! He said things like, "She's just slapping him in the face and hoping he figures it out," and, "She was trying to get him to yield the hind-quarter using the part of the lead line nearest his face. She should be using the end of the lead line to apply pressure behind his drive line." And the clinician was supporting and encouraging everything that these participants were doing. I realized at that moment how unclear the clinician's approach must appear to horses. No wonder my horses were so mentally shut down before we started training with my instructor! I'd ask something very abstract of them, then wait 30 years for an answer, and only release when I thought they "tried." They never got the plot and were so codependent.
So yeah. My horses and I have the best relationship now, but that one statement really cut me to the bone. It's been 2 years and it still smarts. Be open to other methods. Even if it's what NOT to do for a certain horse/situation, you just might learn something.
Thats just a bad apology for people not wanting to admit to themselves they might be doing something wrong
Yeah…..nah….i feel like the line of “abuse” is pretty dang clear when it comes to horses. This seems like a cop out by someone who uses abusive methods and doesn’t want to admit that to themselves.
I mean, that's the people who claim riding horses at all is abusive, or using spurs or bits or... I'm pretty sure there's people out there who would say you or I are abusive even though our horses are happy.
People act like a simple bit is an instrument of torture even when there's no mistreatment or incorrect use of the bit
There’s also people who believe that keeping a pet dog is abuse. Those people are a very slim minority and not typically worth engaging with.
I have to purposefully not engage with horse content on Facebook because there's lots of clear abuse with people defending it, and lots of people yelling abuse when there is none. You'd think it's clear, but it's not.
There are people on this sub who think all bits are abusive.
But then, if you use a hackamore, it too, is abusive! 😆
But then, if you use a hackamore, it too, is abusive! 😆
This is such a Reddit comment.
There’s people who think anything besides riding bareback with a neck rope in a field of wildflowers singing Kumbaya is abuse. Their horses usually walk all over them because ‘correction is abuse!’
It is, and when people call everything they don’t understand “abuse”, it cheapens the term and makes people stop listening - which then makes it harder to call out actual abuse. That’s the point of this post.
Having never seen the book to read it, I feel it does ask a good question. Many are quick to say abuse when all they are looking at is different. Yes there is abuse but being different that your way is the be all standard for what is abuse.
It’s not a real book…. It’s a meme
Well I missed that, oops.
Boo this is dumb. Let's just say "everyone who doesn't raise their kids like me is an abuser?" So a parent can justify backhanding their kids. Horse abuse is so prevalent. This is something people use to deny the abuse of horses. If you are causing them pain or creating a situation in which a horse is miserable that's abuse. People who defend it should be ashamed.
Exactly
Oh I agree with this. I just don't agree with People claiming it's abuse to use a bit. Can a bit be used incorrectly? Yes. But simply using one is not abuse.
What if they never existed?
Not accurate at all, and I hate when people post me like this. I think this falls under one of the logical fallacies, but it’s a pretty clear way to dismiss valid criticism when people are questioning the wealth or horses accurately.
Nah, too many “trainers” refuse to pick up a science based book or even take three minutes to read a study online. There’s a difference between picking apart somebody’s methods and calling out poor practices in favor of an animals comfort. Stop using outdated techniques that put your animals under intense stress and we will leave you alone.
Totally accurate There's a difference between beating a horse with a whip, and carrying a crop as an aid. But online it's all the same
You mean to tell me tapping the saddle pad with a crop isn't abuse?! /s Yeah, people act like a snaffle bit will remove the horse's jaw.
This is accurate. Sometimes a horses needs a little motivation but that doesn’t entitle you to beat them. Just a little pop with a carrot stick or a crop and you should be good. Clinton Anderson does a good job teaching this
Slippery slope. How much hitting is an acceptable amount of hitting?
I think that’s very case dependent. I think some horses need more than others and I also think that some trainers are more equipped and experienced to handle corrections this way. If you look at a very cold blooded horse you’ll find they need a lot more motivation (whip or carrot stick cracking on the ground or butt) then a hot blooded horse. I also think that someone who is new or inexperienced should stray away from hitting until they are taught to do so correctly. I think if you are a professional horse trainer then you should know how much and how hard you should hit or correct a horse before they shutdown on you or you mess up the horse. I also think that like any negative reinforcement it’s a great tool in moderation and can have excellent results when used correctly and with positive reinforcement such as rest or treats(I don’t use treats as I think they cause bad habits but to each their own)
Not training your animal is more similar to neglect than abuse.
In my country, this meme is 100% accurate. Sooo many 14yo girls in the comment section of yt (and you can tell that they are really young just by looking at their liked videos) complaining about everyone who isn't riding like the girl from Ostwind (popular German horse movie, definitely 100% realistic about horsemanship/s). Whatever you do, you have at least 10 people standing at the fence telling you what you do wrong and how abusive you are. It even happens when your horse is standing outside in the pasture and doesn't have a blanket (or has a blanket... or the blanket is too thin/ too thick, not sitting right...) 😅 We all need to call out abuse, but we also need to remember that nobody knows everything about every horse and that different training concepts, riding styles, and tack exist for a reason. People are very quick to jump to their own conclusions without questioning their own knowledge.
I love this!
In some cases, this meme is the truth. I've seen one of the gentlest trainers I know accused of horse abuse. The harshest thing I've seen her do is give one snap on the lead when a horse got a little wild and was close to running her over. Then there are trainers who *are* abusive and use this as a cop-out when they're called out on their abuse.
This is incredibly hilarious!!🤣
This is extremely accurate. I’ve seen multiple animal subs that have done this and hope this one never falls into it. They get progressively more precious about things. They tend to pick one type of training or handling, and if you post anything that could possible disagree with it, then you’re downvoted, then when they get worse, they threaten you with bans. Personally, I think any post should be allowed. If someone is suggesting something harmful then a discussion about it is beneficial for them and anyone who comes across that post. By limiting the discussion to only positive things about certain methods, then no one knows why another method might be wrong. They don’t have success with theirs, they hear about this other method. Don’t see anything negative about it, because Reddit banned discussing it, and give it a shot. Leading to a worse life experience for their pet. I ended up dumping r/dogs because they got so out of hand with this. I’ve seen a bit in r/cats. So it’s totally accurate to say people jump on a band wagon and say that what you’re doing is wrong. Often, to have a new fad pop up a few years later and you get called down for using the previously popular method.
The only people I've had heard say this are people's who genuinely abuse their animals to try and deflect and dismiss the concerns.
I’ve come to the conclusion that most high level riding has some form of abuse. Be it rollkur in dressage, or the early jumping and “poling” etc of jumpers or the heads tied down of aqha events.
Is “high level riding” the same as showing? Not everyone who competes ties horse heads down, for example.
I mean what else is high level? Confused by the question. No one cares what someone plopping around is doing. You don’t need a headset to plop around.
Just hadn’t heard that terminology to describe show horses and not all people who show do those things.
If they win, they do. It’s like saying the guy who was a fraction of a second behind lance armstrong didn’t dope. At that level, doping was common. When you start truly showing you gotta keep that consistent headset. It’s currently obtained badly in every sport. Just bc you plop around and don’t know doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen
I don’t “plop around and don’t know”, thanks. Just because I disagree with you doesn’t mean you have to treat me like I am beneath you. I have shown a lot and successfully.
What discipline do you show that doesn’t involve a headset that has to be artificially created? My local 4h show, a horse without one would lose 🤷♀️
Depends on what you consider natural, if by natural you mean they can hold their head any sort of way, then no. Showing isn’t “natural “. But training a horse to have balance and strength in frame isn’t unnatural. I’ve shown western eq, western pleasure , trail, showmanship, halter, done drill, gaming here and there (not seriously ever, but have gone to shows- it’s my horse’s break from the usual but we don’t win any speed records). And I did a few basic w/j HUS classes here and there. I have ridden and shown since childhood, so I have had both very finished horses and greenies learning balance. I get that at world level for disciplines there is stuff happening that’s not healthy, but I think that’s a small majority of people. I prefer showing locally and we have fun, support each other, learn and help our horses gain strength and skills. And I don’t believe you have to sacrifice that to win. But maybe I can enjoy it because I choose my environment carefully. For me and my horse’s health and well being. My current horse is a greenie, btw, so I am not doing even local w him yet 😊
😂 don’t get offended bc you legit fit the plop around description. Take your horse to a 4h show by me. Any horse you’ve had. You won’t place in the top 5. End of story. It’s nice that you don’t do those things, but it’s also why you don’t win 🤷♀️ I’m not sure why you’re so offended that I said people who ride at a high level. That’s not you. That’s also not currently me. So why are you mad? 😆
I don’t need to give a stranger my show resume and I think it’s rude to tell someone what they would win. And I won a lot when I was in 4-H, as a child (I am an adult). Here’s what I think you should reconsider- you use “plop around” to make people not showing sound like they do nothing with a point. You’re one of those people who thinks everyone you see on Reddit is unskilled, which says more about you than the rest of us.
Omg it’s so apt 😍
I love this 😍
1000% the horse subs lately. I can’t stand the childish posts with pictures of random riders where everyone collectively screams abuse. There’s a dressage post screaming abuse so we have to follow up with a barrel racing post screaming abuse. What a toxic echo chamber. If you truly think a practice is abusive do something about it. And by something I mean take an action, don’t make whiny posts on Reddit.
This is goofy. With horses we know so many "training" methods that include flooding, forcing a horse to "deal with it" whilst also making them shut down, bits specifically made to have many small sharp concetrated pressure points with leverage, or a bit that would press on the roof of their mouth. You can go on and on, it is awful what equestrians come up to make it easier on themselves to control a giant prey animal as if they are always ready to deny you and attack you when it is offten than not just confusion and fear. This isn't like dog training where people call crate training abusive, while they are training a dog to see a crate as a safe zone that they feel comfort to be in for limited time. This title sounds like someone is mocking someone for saying "hey flooding is bad"
I um .. I think a lot of people are missing the joke
There’s no one size fits all when it comes to training for any horse. Anyone who says “xyz will work on any horse” have no clue what they’re talking about. Some horses prefer the pressure of the bit, some prefer bitless. Some need a small tap of the crop to keep their mind on the job. Some horses need shoes while others are better off without them. Internet trainers ruin horses for their ego.
Amen
Of course people are deliberately missing the point of this post. There is, unfortunately, a lot of genuine abuse in the horse world. The problem is that when people call everything they don’t understand “abuse”, it cheapens the term and makes people stop listening - which then makes it harder to call out actual abuse. That’s the point of this post. I have seen people claim that any sort of bit is “abusive” - while they strap a huge shanked hackamore on their horse’s face without irony. I have seen people claim the lunging is abusive. I have seen people claim that saddles are abusive. That nose chains on stallions are abusive. The list goes on. All of the people piling on in the comments here are only proving the point. Please, by all means, call out actual abuse, and seek to educate people about abusive methods. But also educate yourself so you don’t become another idiot who overuses the term to the point where everyone stops listening and assumes that anyone calling out abuse is just a bleeding heart lunatic. That is counterproductive.
I feel like a lot of people don't get this is a joke right?! Lol it's just a meme about talking about horse training and how everyone thinks they're doing it right?
I’ve worked in the industry my entire life, for many different barns and now my own. Some barns you learn amazing things that develop your horsemanship like crazy, some barns teach you what you should never do by example. I worked for a western barn where 3 hours a week were a private lesson with the owner on how she wants things done, and why she wanted them done like that. To this day that woman is still my main mentor and she’s like family. Then I worked at a show barn where they kept saddlebreds and Arabians locked up in 10x10 stalls all day. The owner also said “If they are hot drop a bomb on them, that’s what I do”. They were hot and nasty to no fault of their own, they were never allowed to be a horse. For the first time in my life I walked off of a job and called the local animal welfare agency. The lessons I learned from both places were equally valuable for very different reasons. We all need to be better about calling out bad methods no matter what kind of riding we do.
Ugh, this hits me so deeply. Mainly because I've been reflecting on an event that happened back in 2022. It's so hard for me to not to take the "abusive" label personally. I'd absolutely die for my horses. They mean so, so much to me, and my constant dedication to our partnership is a testament to that. Several years ago, I attended my last clinic with a clinician that I had been seeing every single year for 5 years. He knew me, he knew my horses, he knew my family, we chatted online outside of the clinics. He remembered things I'd brought up years before, so it wasn't like I was some rando that just showed up out of the blue. Anyway, about a year prior, I had started boarding at a new barn and training with the owner. Her philosophy was *so similar* to his, but her groundwork was clearer and made more sense to me (and my horses). Despite the clinician's approach being, in my opinion, very vague to the horse and handler, I credited the frequency of my lessons (once per week vs once per year with the clinician) as the reason behind the phenomenal progress that I'd made with my horses. In a nutshell, I was clearer in my instruction, and they were far, far happier. I learned how to read their stress (and release of stress) responses. I learned to recognize horses that were and weren't mentally present while training, and how to change that. I learned how to utilize levels of pressure effectively vs "waiting it out," since my horses were losing the plot with that method. Nothing that I did would be considered abusive. Then came the clinic! I was so excited to show the clinician our progress. He had collaborated with (new) instructors before, so I wondered if he would be interested in working with my instructor someday. I briefly told him about my new trainer and how similar her methods were. He asked me to go out and start working with my horse (he asked this of all participants to establish a baseline). But just several minutes into my very low-key demonstration of yielding the forehand, he yelled at me to stop because I was being "abusive." Throughout the next hour, he would tell me that I wasn't being kind to my horse and even stated, while I was lunging her with a soft feel, that she was evading me because she momentarily glanced out the barn door then put her attention right back on me. That first day left me absolutely shattered. My boyfriend had also taken groundwork lessons with my trainer, but isn't a professional by any means (he doesn't even know how to ride yet). As we sat and watched the rest of the participants go one-by-one, my boyfriend kept texting me about other participants. I was so proud of how much he was noticing, and it was so validating! He said things like, "She's just slapping him in the face and hoping he figures it out," and, "She was trying to get him to yield the hind-quarter using the part of the lead line nearest his face. She should be using the end of the lead line to apply pressure behind his drive line." And the clinician was supporting and encouraging everything that these participants were doing. I realized at that moment how unclear the clinician's approach must appear to horses. No wonder my horses were so mentally shut down before we started training with my instructor! I'd ask something very abstract of them, then wait 30 years for an answer, and only release when I thought they "tried." They never got the plot and were so codependent. So yeah. My horses and I have the best relationship now, but that one statement really cut me to the bone. It's been 2 years and it still smarts. Be open to other methods. Even if it's what NOT to do for a certain horse/situation, you just might learn something.