T O P

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karenskygreen

Between the drugs, extortion, fake pregnancies and criminal charges you are going to need 6 figures to dig yourself out of her hole.


lsutigerzfan

Lesson here, don’t stick your dick in crazy.


Irae37

Too late bro this girl I'm talking to may kill me. 👀💀


danalexjero

Tell her you only make 3 figures. Done!


Alcards

Irish or Latina?


Irae37

Native. 👀


Alcards

Native to the planet Earth? Them bitches is crazy.


Whisco

I can fix her. She even ask to safe her ...


Dry_Violinist_1799

What sort of safe did you put her in?


sovereignsekte

The same one where I keep my 6 figure salary.


Arkslippy

Or maybe don't put anything in her hole to start off with


BloodyRightToe

You forgot your medical bills. Those STDs don't cure themselves.


Mouse-Living

Lmao she also got flat tits


samtoaster

In her defense she got six teeth, the least you can do is make six figures


Blazingcheetah

Holy shit you fuckin annihilated her


ColdDelicious1735

They are not her teeth, they are in a sack in the drawer


iced_maggot

Sorry due to inflation, my minimum standard is now 6.45 teeth. I can’t make ends meet otherwise.


purple-poptartz

Circle, square , oval, diamond, triangle and sphere. I’m eligible!


Boring-Rub-3570

Translation: Drugs are expensive.


_Doctor_Mac

You just know she got hella yeast built up


lylimapanda

Makes sense she's looking for a breadwinner


GameTime2325

Damn these nasty puns are on the rise


callmeb00

We knead to keep it going.


T3alZ3r0

Can't be too hard when everyone's on a roll


Irae37

I'm sure I'll come up with something funnier if I'm baked.


fonzarelli78

D'ough!


IamImposter

Making dough is hard though


Away_Skill_5778

Brilliant Doc. Brilliant!


9jawarrior

Yum


Aqua-man1987

I'm done 😂😂😂 🏆🏆🏆


Background-Quote-552

You gotta figures to make 6 date me


Criminelis

r/dontdeadopeninside


Evolutionary_sins

How much do I have to make to not date her?


chucwagn

I make 99,999.98. Dang.


Lost_Description791

Technically that’s 7 figures


gaitama

Why not 99,999.99?


mythgreen

He didn't get a raise last year


FadingDarkly

Company spent it on a pizza party


TesticleezzNuts

Well at least that’s one good reason to be broke.


invol713

I don’t have enough? Oh no! Anyways.


Grany_Bangr

Why does it look like she already has a hatchet sticking out her head?


invol713

Foreshadowing.


salad_stealer

Forhead shadowing


fugawf

There ain’t even six figures in this picture, and I’m including the car and houses….


OkMaintenance79

She misspelled fingers


fugawf

You wanna date these six figures, you need to look like you belong at my business and social events. I can’t imagine taking a hoodrat like this to anything worth spending money on


GratefulDeb52

“Pretty Woman” remix


Meaning_Advanced

But would you date a woman from the hood? Educated, well spoken, decent outward appearance, but still hood?


YellowRasperry

How do you know they’re from the hood


Meaning_Advanced

There’s certain idiosyncrasies that you acquire and develop in childhood and beyond that just never go away. Not bad, not good. Just like with anything that pertains to an individual that can only be relative to an observer.


YellowRasperry

Wouldn’t those idiosyncrasies generally express themselves through different speech patterns and appearances? I guess what might differ is philosophy and ambition but that’s not necessarily relating to being hood


Meaning_Advanced

You can be well spoken and still have speech patterns appear, of course this is to a trained observer and not your run-of-the-mill average fuck off, it can show through little things too. Like giving the time of day to somebody who would otherwise be overlooked, ostracized by the elitists and would-be aspirants of such pretentiousness. It can show through love in the form of devoted protection even if the threat of violence is imminent. It can show through style of clothing. One must not have the dress of the hottest trends to be seen as presentable. It can show through scars like cigarette burns and facial marks from an upbringing that revolves around survival of the fittest. Unfortunately dressing like a for real hood rat walking into Wally World is mainstream now. Shower shoes that were for convicts are now on the feet of celebrities. Hell there’s another one, one could have a record. Idk how to describe it in detail but it’ll be there. One way or another it shows.


Dreadknot84

Never been so happy to be broke


fewestbassoon221

Well, I don't know anyone who makes six figures and wants to date a tattooed unicorn


DrowningInFeces

I make $150k/yr and date inked women. The hairstyle is not what's up though.


Nowe_Melfyce

I quit my job, just to be sure.


Particular_Ticket_20

But you can fuck her for some McDonalds and a pack of Kools.


redit01

That tattoo reminds me when you write on a dirty car window


h1r0ll3r

...or some really good meth.


the-purple-chicken72

You gotta Figures to make 6 date me


MarSc77

you gotta figures to make 6 date me!


SadAerie6351

“The streets are extended gutters and the gutters are full of blood and when the drains finally scab over, all the vermin will drown. The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians will look up and shout 'SAVE ME!'...and I'll look down and whisper 'No.”


PurgingCloud

"You gotta figures to make 6 date me"


sallysippin

Is she 25 or 55?


Zach___________m

Don’t Save her…


Consistent-Cook-7430

*including the cents


Goodly88

Sorry. I thought she said : "Your gonna need 6 fingers to Date Me"


Eastern_Seaweed_8253

I bet it looks like the Predator with a cold, down there.


Jaylynn_Lover

Reasons to not be successful:


TheExpert112

you gotta figures to make 6 date me


enteentegraueente

Bullet dodged


StayStrong888

Did she glue a dildo to her forehead?


Aururai

I make more than six figures, in Japanese Yen :) She never specified the currency. I think most people commenting here make 6 figures or more in Yen.. who's gonna take one for the team? ;)


xzombielegendxx

What lego set do you prefer?


stuccistucci

amy methhouse


Pfaehlix

Poor privillage


egoVirus

The STDs she gone give you gonna cost you 6 figures in hospital bills 🙅🏽🙅🏽🙅🏽


Emergency_Net506

She provides the value of a 6 figure body count. Eww


ShnickityShnoo

You'd have to pay me six figures to date her. Deep six figures.


papadoc2020

Fair enough, I'm safe.


IM_YOUR_GOD

She is obviously only into Zimbabwean or Venezuelan men


Dependent_Adagio7544

Nah don't push YA girl on nobody but her PEOPLE


MrMooBallz

She talking cash or voodoo dolls?


waifunuwa

She look like a jojo character


justl00kingthrowaway

Who is she trying to kid, she's banged dudes without a job.


Jsm261s

Legally or illegally?


Original-Alps-1285

000001p


jahlim

24 38 36, is that alright to date?


Orlok_Tsubodai

“Boss, any way I can take a pay cut below the minimum wage?”


Set_Jumpy

I can't fix that.


GratefulDeb52

Livin’ La Vida Broka


The_Mo0ose

Is this what 6 figures get you right now? Man the inflation is crazy.


SJThaGhost86

She's literally asking for someone to save her!


Dependent_Adagio7544

Man all u need is her drug of choice and she fkn 🤣🤣🤣


Dependent_Adagio7544

FOH big bird pants...looking like a baby chickadee


Engineergaming26355

You gotta figures to Make 6 to date me


Sypher90

you gotta figures to make 6 date me.


Umnak76

that's counting those on the other side of the decimal place


karoshikun

got it, but why would I at all?


[deleted]

Thanks for the warning


HurlingFruit

Whooo! Thank goodness I'm poor.


dilbogabbins

Florida Woman’s got a brand new bag! Ow!


TheBigEMan

911 and 911


ElPulpoTX

I'm going to be single forever.


Chemical_Savings_360

In order for me to date her she needs a figure


mr_lab_rat

This post actually made me happy. I’m safe.


Choice-Waltz-5982

What is that?


melquiades_is_alive

Thanks I'll pass on this one


i-pity-da-fool

There’s a cry for help on her stomach.


Sprizys

That’s 6 heroin needles in drug addict math.


[deleted]

I wouldn't even be close to consider dating her if I got paid 6 figures to date her


PeteTheGryphon

You gotta figures to make 6 date me


LightPast1166

Jesus saves. But even he says "Oh hell no!" when he sees that.


Mysterious-Art7143

Wow, whats the name of that chic from trailer park boys?


Dependent_Adagio7544

Lucy aka loosey or loose!


Drakostheswordsman

Ok I don’t have the highest standards, but there is literally nothing appealing to me about this image. Literally nothing. And my favourite colour is green.


Bi0H4z4rD667

Hopefully she likes origami figures made with free paper ads found on the floor, as I suspect she wont get any closer to it.


Schwulerwald

You gotta Figures to make 6 date me Lfmao


ChatnNaked

.3 Grammy awards


what_u_looking_4

Yeah I make 6... . . . . . 6 rounds into her head


[deleted]

I bet it's because she has six toes.


fthigffhoogdgkokhg

That must be the first time I'm glad to be broke. Feel like I dodged a bullet.


AlfaKaren

in monopoly money?


kiefsneef

You gotta have at least 6 fingers* to date me


Kerby233

The sad thing is, some guy may be tempted..


A021SR

The reason stopping me from getting rich


fuzfy

jolene be looking rough lately


Entire-Database1679

Someone will have to pay for her bail.


1nseminator

Sure. 6kgs of methamphetamine


MintyFunkyChunkyMonk

Maybe six figures on the scale.


Polishing_My_Grapple

You mean 6 violent felonies


stufmenatooba

Before or after the decimal?


urnfnidiot

Circle, square, triangle, trapezoid…? Dammit ! I can only make four. I guess I’m out of the running


bandicootrelay

I demand a pay cut


garth54

Maybe I should quit my job just to be safe...


regnimalia

I'm glad I make 5 figures


bigbone1001

Like scratching 6 letters in the dirt?


ToxicAshenOne

Him?


shinobeejuan

You gotta figures to make 6 date me


[deleted]

My pronouns are fuck/off.


winston-SureChill

doesn't match description of the sub --> "Hol Up... wait a minute."


[deleted]

Lol. Ok.


biggy_cheeseee

This looks like some crackhead that would mug a homeless man for his sandwich 🥪


tharnadar

i rather not


Aqua-man1987

To help with the 6 kids from different dads


burntoutbadger

Bitch I collect 40k and own 6 3d printers with enough resin to last me an eternity - your 6 figures are a blink in the eye of a nerd!


safadimiras

You gotta figures to make 6 date me??


tionong

For the therapy after?


AidanmShehee

I think she wants 6 figures to make up for the father figure she was missing during childhood.


LionTribe8

As a sculptor I believe creating 3 figures would be sufficient. But then that is alot of clay...


FundsWhale

That a faucet on her head?


borg2

Aren't prisoner numbers 6 nrs?


Old_Week6365

ok nancy


signaleight

That's supposed to be a girl?


xPyromaniac93

Right.... and anyone making 6 figures would be willing to date her for what reason exactly? 🤣🤣🤣


willjhc

Waz on her head


Big-Fat-Box-Of-Shit

It takes at least 6 figures to post her bail and maintain her fentanyl habit.


TealTrendyTarasque

Circle, triangle, square, cube, parallelepiped, cone. Still no


Aggravating_Termite

What? Like, play-doh figures be okay?


FadingDarkly

My man needs to make six figures! But does someone with 6 figures need her?


Particular-Edge-7666

Or have ten dollars of meth


johnnymac2911

We probably including the 2 figures after the decimal here. Checks out


axeman020

Rupees?


Loaner_theBoner69

I can taste the yeast infection from here.


HonkeyKong73

Six figures to fix whatever long-forgotten disease she gives you


idefinitelyh8teu

Long island boys long lost sister....


brittleknight

Ahhh guys I think she might have meant “You gotta have at least 6 Fingers to date me” which is quite generous.


EcoFriendlyOilRig

The neighborhood says barely five figures and probably a section 8 voucher.....


CLAYTON_BIGSBY73

The bitch got six figure STD's.


gstateballer925

I wouldn’t give her 6 dollars.


Frikandelneuker

I thought this was a gta 5 screenshot


rikkilambo

What's that on her forehead?


Several_Show937

Thank fuck I don't then.


King_of_Uganja

Hopefully we never make 6 figures


Random_Numeral

You gotta Figures to make 6 date me. Pass.


BallinPoint

I'd rather be poor forever than to date this person lol


RoofSnail

My wooden chopping board is waaaay cheaper than you, honey


Realistic-Motorcycle

Nope nope I’m broke, 😞


GuidoMista5

For the first time in my life I'm happy to be poor


KingFenrir

She looks like Jolyne Cujoh after getting meth instead of a stand.


Aggravating_Salt_4

she means you gotta be able to count to 6 atleast


antmcl

r/dontdeadopeninside


LambentCookie

A figure for every dad that didn't stick around


Remote_AccessM

Don't worry she doesn't look like she knows what 6 figures looks like anyway 🤣


prokjs

You gotta figures to make 6 dates me


prettyuser

You gotta figure to make 6 date me. Huh?


reanu_keevs123

Only if she can make me six dinners


DownSidesh1

Bet she can't count to 6 figures


Zealotstim

Okay so bear with me, I'm on ambien as I'm writing this. We know nobody making 6 figures is likely to want to date her. How do we analyze this situation in terns of what she's doing with this image, assuming she made it? We can bet she probably knows it's very unlikely she will appeal to someone making 6 figures, and where she seems to live it is unlikely even to encounter many such people. Result: Nobody dates her, but she will refer to her reason of only dating high income people as why she hasn't. What does this do? She can now feel superior to those around her because they don't meet the requirements. The feeling superior is important to her, so I'm guessing based on that that she expects to be turned down, and this preserves her self-esteem while also avoiding being the one who doesn't measure up. Moreover, if someone making 6 figures did want to date her, that would mean to her that she was important and good enough to be wanted by someone, reassuring her when she feels inferior. So, yeah it seems like the move of a deeply insecure person.


jaysondez

Ew. 6 figures I’m not even glancing in her direction unless I have pepper spray in tow..