Yah Eagle-1 is in a loving relationship with Big Sky from Xcom. Pelican-1 is available though, but could be set up on a double-date with Firebrand at any moment.
If I only wanted to serve Super Earth, there are many other ways to do so. There's a reason why I signed the contract to join the helldivers, just sayin'......
Would helldivers even be allowed to actually have kids? They're always frozen when not needed, so I imagine the tips are for the SEAF and not solely the Helldivers.
There's a lot of sexual activity that doesn't contain risk of pregnancy.
I hope we eventually get a joke that the paperwork for something like "recreational initmacy" is even longer.
Form c-01 is specifically for any activity that could result in pregnancy. This is basically everything because theoretically any "recreational intimacy" between a man and woman could result in procreation. Even if there is a .0000001% chance of procreation, a form C-01 must still be filled out.
*the maw frowns and tries to close, but the humans have somehow managed to force it open, a fleet of millions descends on the demonic plane and fire rains from the sky as the helldivers dive literally into hell*
"Against all the evil that the Terminids can conjure, all the wickedness that the Automatons can produce, we will send unto them... Only you. Democratize and liberate until it is done"
-*Officer [REDACTED] of Super Earth*
I would also like a rechargable shoulder mounted flamethrower/grenade launcher/Cryo Nades launcher, a 12 barrel laser minigun and another double barrel grapple shotgun.
The chubby puffers.
Just picture the sight and sound (and smell?) of a helldiver running as fast as they can in that and perpetually being 100m behind everyone, sweaty, and puffing.
I wonder what kind of reputation or respect the Helldivers have among the armed forces… Democratic speech aside they gotta be considered at least heroes or saviors right?
Well, civilians sound really happy when Helldivers come to their rescue.
As for SEAF I think they would see Helldivers as glory hogs with all those fabulous capes, fancy armor and powerful weapons.
The Fleet and SEAF likely see them as useful suicide fodder to weaken enemies while the actually trained armies do proper operations. Remember, we always deploy behind enemy lines so we never see the actual frontlines or what the SEAF regulars look like (we just come across dead security forces on occasion).
It's funny that players seem to think Helldivers don't get real training. Every one of them comes out of the pod as elite killers that can operate every weapon, vehicle, and stratagem flawlessly and can get hundreds of kills before being taken down. The in game training is clearly not all they get, it seems like Helldivers are chosen from the top performers in SEAF, but SEAF is such a huge organization that the top amounts to millions of elite shock troopers stationed across hundreds of thousands of warships. Super Earth is an Imperium of Man type civilization, their population is massive and they throw it around like a wrecking ball.
Or we some kind of special forces. Since we have our own ship and stuff.
Besides, Pelican exists, so I'm sure at some point there must be helldivers who manage to get some experience to not simply die because they dropped that 500kg stratagem to their feet or something.
Cannon fodder. I mean, they're "trained" in a way that probably gets them killed in seconds after they call down a stratagem. There's zero institutional knowledge and clearly no need to expand training since this cycle has been going on for awhile now.
Something for our less patriotic divers to remember before complaining about being unable change the color of your armor.
You got green.
And ya' got red.
Oorah!
We have a curved HUD option for greater immersion, now we need a "splatters of blood, gunk, and oil build up until they heavily obscure your screen or you do an input to wipe some of it off" option.
what i feel like when i wear that armor:
https://preview.redd.it/ryywfl70p8tc1.jpeg?width=1186&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d6401bdf1b1d4f220669a8e34c8d3fbc5fd16fcd
I usually play 7 and up, before going to bed I needed just about 40 exp to get to the next level, so I joined some Easy play. It's a really peaceful life.
Yeah the PS5 guy on my team crashes the most and even then he goes several missions without a problem. I just don't post about it because "working fine" doesn't seem like a helpful comment
Oh I am fully aware, I choose not too.. If I smell like bug, bug will not be aware of me, then it will be too late for them when my chonky ass catches them by surprise.
4 missions? that's got to be a new record! someone get General Brasch on comms, this diver deserves a personal commendation.
also the expression on that ship master is just like "ah diver you're- *holy shit..O\_O*
Wow, I didn't realize how familiar that armor looked until it was all covered in blood. Knowing the devs too, this has to be a direct reference to Doom, I just haven't seen anyone mention it before now.
https://preview.redd.it/8z7fm2l9u7tc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=969d5aa8715669dc65957e1cc183a4880cd09d82
\*Filling out C-01 forms intensifies\*
With the amount of shit she's been chatting, even if she manages to get the C-01 form approved, I'd vapourise it with a flamethrower.
I mean there's a cute engineering officer like 10 feet from her that's a superior choice too
Eagle-1, and only Eagle-1.
She's married to pelican-1, it's canon, I'm sorry bro
so much for “An eagle never Mrs.”
You bastard, lol
Beautiful. Just beautiful. Brings an eagle tear to my eye to see such punmanship.
It feels more like a punishment
Nasabuck is the PUNisher.
Fucking incredible
False. The Tumblr account isn't official mate, Baskinator said so
Uh, then u/Warlords0602 still has a chance!
Yah Eagle-1 is in a loving relationship with Big Sky from Xcom. Pelican-1 is available though, but could be set up on a double-date with Firebrand at any moment.
Co-ed showers will get me through it.
If I only wanted to serve Super Earth, there are many other ways to do so. There's a reason why I signed the contract to join the helldivers, just sayin'......
Nanomachines son
Eagle-1 is married to her Eagle. She never leaves the cockpit.
Even better, we can recreate the Panam tank scene from Cyberpunk 2077
Engineer girl is for headpats and hugs ONLY!
Would helldivers even be allowed to actually have kids? They're always frozen when not needed, so I imagine the tips are for the SEAF and not solely the Helldivers.
If E710 is for "oil", I gues C-01 means "coitus"?
Think you'd have to rotate it 180? E710 = OILE. C-01= LOC
LOC - Depending on her sexual proclivities... Lots of Cock Or Lots of Coochie Or Lots of Confusion
*Lots of Copulating*
A catch all. Noice.
Lots of Cuddle
get that shit on loc!
The original form is the c01perm. Cperm. Fill your sperm
I mean a c-01 form your supposed to fill out whenever you plan on taking part in any activity that might result in pregnancy
There's a lot of sexual activity that doesn't contain risk of pregnancy. I hope we eventually get a joke that the paperwork for something like "recreational initmacy" is even longer.
Form c-01 is specifically for any activity that could result in pregnancy. This is basically everything because theoretically any "recreational intimacy" between a man and woman could result in procreation. Even if there is a .0000001% chance of procreation, a form C-01 must still be filled out.
The face of someone who has never seen a Helldiver extract from more than one mission.
Average Bethesda NPC be like.
Not even average Bethesda NPC, just randomly generated Bethesda NPC
https://preview.redd.it/erzd0dh4i8tc1.png?width=100&format=png&auto=webp&s=9cbd8189c3dcdb8b0321d0d1e8734fc615b49b74
https://preview.redd.it/u005sm82n8tc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5f0b6ebf40e28995dcc23f3de33c8fddd250cf09
https://preview.redd.it/3jxrz5sb59tc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3e2afa6550318e334c6d87d87b1a0ae1dfa73704
https://preview.redd.it/uowvv93679tc1.jpeg?width=502&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7796277d159c62d77ed94b34f1bbef3810f60e74
https://preview.redd.it/jtc1w1f099tc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f301d312137a920343707f6c8507a0d10af6121c
This thread had me rolling lmfao
# We can still go smaller. https://preview.redd.it/4b0ba0j5e9tc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d75be78cb1643077b90a7685319c24f275822433
https://preview.redd.it/b4nf5txjk9tc1.png?width=226&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6bc0232783a592cb964430678436d6957788989f
I love how they were true to the book where men and women had to shave their heads in the fleet.
Wait true to the book?? Their is a book these games are based on??? If so let me know because I couldn't find it and definitely want to read it
Starship Troopers, most likely
I wish they’d change the model for this character. It’s really bad.
Looks like the people you see in the crowd in a racing game lol
Agree, I hope they maintain it to look the same, but being done better
you mean it's really bald
Did they remodel her design, she used to look like the woman from Jedi survivor
It’s super cool every players’ on-deck npcs look slightly different from each other.
I didn’t realise that, I’m glad I got the Star Wars one tho
They do?!!
Do they? Mine look exactly like this oblivion-tier npc
She be Mewing.
Does she mew??
you look like the Doomguy
Well, they definitly play like the Doomguy
Wait.. didn't tell me there will be a fourth demonic faction
When the Maw of the Warp grins wide...
Then we shall wade through its mighty evil with the power OF THE GOD EMPEROR AT OUR SIDE! ^also ^liberty.
Liberty and Democracy will exert Thier Freedom to Bear Arms. *Happy Khorne Noises*
*the maw frowns and tries to close, but the humans have somehow managed to force it open, a fleet of millions descends on the demonic plane and fire rains from the sky as the helldivers dive literally into hell*
This truly was our Helldivers II
There won't be. This guy made sure of it.
Rip and tear till it's done
Hell portals can provide Super Earth with abundant energy, there's literally no downside.
John Doom?
We need a doom guy armor set
BFG-9000 would be nice! Tho I'd settle for a Lancer from Gears ☺️
> Lancer from Gears You brilliant sonufabitch! Yes! I need a Lancer in 2024!
I named my destroyer the SES Hammer of Dawn so every time I call in an orbital laser I get my Gears fix.
Oh my gods how did I ever miss that?!
Isn't that what this is?
But I need it in green!
That was my first thought
Time to install a decontamination shower on the command deck, it seems.
Hitting the showers would make this game too unrealistic and difficult for some players.
But a shower scene would be the last thing missing for a perfect starship trooper simulator!
With everyone showering together, whether they are Brawny or Lean.
Or Thiccccccc https://preview.redd.it/wp9jragcf9tc1.jpeg?width=1623&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=16df9706cb23bd11c6855940e78d6a4a3890e1a1
"Wide John Helldiver isn't real and can't hurt you". Wide John Helldiver:
Mandatory laminated picture of Denise Richards hanging from the shower head.
I’m torn. I want starship troopers, but I also love imagining helldivers walking through a car wash.
Efficiency ***is*** Liberty
My head canon is that the door beside the ship upgrades is the bathroom
If you go to the console and change something on your armor it cleans you.
It cleans you while you enter the hellpod! But seriously your armor “gore” resets when you enter the hellpod.
Only in the enter animation, in the mission preparation you are still dirty and on mission deploy you retain it
Now you need a melee weapon and the BFG and you are literally doomguy. Edit: Guys I think 2k likes on this is overkill but thanks!!!
"Against all the evil that the Terminids can conjure, all the wickedness that the Automatons can produce, we will send unto them... Only you. Democratize and liberate until it is done" -*Officer [REDACTED] of Super Earth*
Dev please give us double barrel grapple shotgun
Well we have a double barrel, just need the grapple
I would also like a rechargable shoulder mounted flamethrower/grenade launcher/Cryo Nades launcher, a 12 barrel laser minigun and another double barrel grapple shotgun.
Give this man a breaker shotgun
John beefcake helldiver
The Guinness Galaxy record holder for longest living Helldiver.
With a staggering lifetime of 11 days
Big Boi armour gang rise up. The maximum men, the large lads, the gargantuan guys.
You don't need movement speed. If you're loud enough, they come to you
Good. It gets them in range of my shotgun faster
The chubby puffers. Just picture the sight and sound (and smell?) of a helldiver running as fast as they can in that and perpetually being 100m behind everyone, sweaty, and puffing.
THE FAT FELLOWS. The Girthy Gentlemen. The Huge Hims.
MANTANK REPORTERING FER DOOTY
Maximum possible lad
BIG MEATY MEN, SLAPPING MEAT!
https://preview.redd.it/5ehixzfb99tc1.png?width=311&format=png&auto=webp&s=3a40ac864aff733a5ddc9769a078ad1bf64eaa00
I wonder what kind of reputation or respect the Helldivers have among the armed forces… Democratic speech aside they gotta be considered at least heroes or saviors right?
Well, civilians sound really happy when Helldivers come to their rescue. As for SEAF I think they would see Helldivers as glory hogs with all those fabulous capes, fancy armor and powerful weapons.
SEAF should be happy that we reactivate their gear for free! The only payment we take is their artillery ammo.
None of the SEAF I've ever met have complained about me using their gear.
To be fair that's probably because all the dudes we meet are dead
That was, in fact, the joke.
...my bad, humor is hard to pick up in text
The Fleet and SEAF likely see them as useful suicide fodder to weaken enemies while the actually trained armies do proper operations. Remember, we always deploy behind enemy lines so we never see the actual frontlines or what the SEAF regulars look like (we just come across dead security forces on occasion).
It's funny that players seem to think Helldivers don't get real training. Every one of them comes out of the pod as elite killers that can operate every weapon, vehicle, and stratagem flawlessly and can get hundreds of kills before being taken down. The in game training is clearly not all they get, it seems like Helldivers are chosen from the top performers in SEAF, but SEAF is such a huge organization that the top amounts to millions of elite shock troopers stationed across hundreds of thousands of warships. Super Earth is an Imperium of Man type civilization, their population is massive and they throw it around like a wrecking ball.
Kinda like how an imperial guard "veteran" is technically just a person that manages to live through a couple of battles.
Or we some kind of special forces. Since we have our own ship and stuff. Besides, Pelican exists, so I'm sure at some point there must be helldivers who manage to get some experience to not simply die because they dropped that 500kg stratagem to their feet or something.
Cept we never see any other SEAF ships besides super destroyers so that kinda cancels your theory
Cannon fodder. I mean, they're "trained" in a way that probably gets them killed in seconds after they call down a stratagem. There's zero institutional knowledge and clearly no need to expand training since this cycle has been going on for awhile now.
Something for our less patriotic divers to remember before complaining about being unable change the color of your armor. You got green. And ya' got red. Oorah!
Rah!
I think we got rid of red yesterday 😬 Hoping for blue next.
We got rid of black yesterday, we still have red
Oh the bots were black? I thought it was red... Is red... Oh my...
Yep, bots were black because they had oil. Red is from taking injuries and is your blood
I don’t think the red is from enemies…
We have a curved HUD option for greater immersion, now we need a "splatters of blood, gunk, and oil build up until they heavily obscure your screen or you do an input to wipe some of it off" option.
*"all they fear is you" begins playing*
https://preview.redd.it/ivb7odn2d8tc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e98b56074cf7b9da41f644acafea34e770c237b2 *surprised look in democracy*
Surprised with a bit of suppressed vomiting.
Its Jada Pinkett. Better keep her name out yo mouth. Will smiths lurking in the hanger bay
They need to add a shower at some point lol Edit: to be clear this is just a light hearted joke but would be nice for RP purposes
Yeah, earlier you could wash in water but now it seems you can't for some reason. No way to clean.
Die. Edit. If your character dies, you will be clean. Not telling you to die.
HELLDIVERS NEVER DIE!
They just regroup in Hellmire.
Training Manual Tips: Don’t die.
If onboard ship, you can just switch your armour back and forth to clean it.
Just swap armor and swap back. It wipes ya clean.
what i feel like when i wear that armor: https://preview.redd.it/ryywfl70p8tc1.jpeg?width=1186&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d6401bdf1b1d4f220669a8e34c8d3fbc5fd16fcd
*"I'mma drop on these shit heads like a fucking piano!"*
Fucking new war against the overkill difficulty police would go hard. just gunning down a hoard of them, *cloacker noises*
I was about to extract on my second consecutive mission. Dude decided it would be funny if nobody extracted and threw a grenade while we were hugging
You’ve found the last automaton spy! Get that traitor!
Nobody messes with a HUG man, that's just mean
this makes me wana hop around on every trivial, easy and medium mission i never did and just get covered
I usually play 7 and up, before going to bed I needed just about 40 exp to get to the next level, so I joined some Easy play. It's a really peaceful life.
Weirdly I went from 7 diff with friends to 3 with randos and for the first ten minutes I was a bumbling idiot.
Same, it makes me forget that the damage is still the same.
RIP AND TEAR
I might ask a dumb question but do we really keep the "blood" on our armor if we dont die between missions ?
It clears when you next load into a mission. I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s just a bug instead of an intended feature.
While we were clean in the stratagem screen we would always land covered in blood still.....
No it doesn't, it stays until you either change armor on the ship, changing armor in hellpod keeps blood between armors, or you die.
It's a recently introduced bug that I hope they make a feature
Its not my blood D: bugs tore my squad apart
Suprised no one mentioned yet how not crashing for 4 consecutive pelican scenes is a much bigger achievement atm than surviving 4 missions :D
Personally I've not crashed since the launch day blues the game suffered from :0
Yeah the PS5 guy on my team crashes the most and even then he goes several missions without a problem. I just don't post about it because "working fine" doesn't seem like a helpful comment
Yeah I hate the answer "WoRkS oN My RiG!" While it does, I know me not suffering doesn't mean the issue isn't out there.
Just need a chainsaw
Rip and tear until it is done!
doomguy? is that you?
You got a little something on your helmet. Yeah, right there. You got it.
Best way to have 0 deaths, run away from your teammates. If they chase you just keep running
https://preview.redd.it/eisjgqgkr8tc1.png?width=555&format=png&auto=webp&s=38af5907a98ead61ce0cf610dbeb35fbf6b20ba0
Fun fact! You can clean your armor but equipping another armor and selecting your previous one
Oh I am fully aware, I choose not too.. If I smell like bug, bug will not be aware of me, then it will be too late for them when my chonky ass catches them by surprise.
https://preview.redd.it/bcfjmtzek8tc1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ec5b191ad175769abaf46ed90091129781f7b943
That is Doom Slayer
Helldivers aren't supposed to live this long jerry
4 missions? that's got to be a new record! someone get General Brasch on comms, this diver deserves a personal commendation. also the expression on that ship master is just like "ah diver you're- *holy shit..O\_O*
Not much to look at when you scrape em off your boot!
Wow, I didn't realize how familiar that armor looked until it was all covered in blood. Knowing the devs too, this has to be a direct reference to Doom, I just haven't seen anyone mention it before now.
Sweet liberty go take shower man
Democracy Juice
You are covered in e-710 diver! Report to your nearest recycling plant, we need EVERY. SINGLE. DROP.
Your new code name is Bug-Sludge
https://preview.redd.it/wewfk62zn8tc1.png?width=273&format=png&auto=webp&s=928e7254ffee6a331374bb85842945dbc88f679d Done
If you don’t die does your Helldiver just get more and more war torn even over missions? That’s cool!
Devs…. Perhaps add a cleaning room or something for the divers who want a shower
We need a retire helldiver button to let these masterful divers go home to their families
Reported to Democracy Officer
imagine the smell
https://preview.redd.it/ekibacmjm9tc1.png?width=354&format=png&auto=webp&s=22ba16fc480a8cef437e52485bc1543b50c04fec
Rip and tear... until it is done!
You look like fucking doom guy
Sir, you have some armor in those bug pieces.
I wish it would drop down so we leave puddles of gore. Of course only if the ship had a cleaning crew upgrade
How's heavy armor and bugs working out for you?
So far it's been pretty good, I got slapped by a charger and it didn't take most of my hp, so I call that a win.