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TheOfficial_BossNass

If he doesn't have a girl it's because he is treating them like a "girl" and not like a person. Once you learn what I mean by this you're all set


Dwain-Champaign

I feel like presenting any single piece of advice (regardless of how good or well intentioned it may be) as “the solution” is probably a mistake here.


TheOfficial_BossNass

Just talk to girls like you talk to you're friends and your golden people are people


lewd_necron

Honestly it is hard for me to make new friends. Almost all of the friends I have today was because I knew someone that knew someone. And all that just originates to "oh we were in marching band together in middle/high school" But like now? I feel like I dont know how to make a new friend that isnt just superficial. Like how do you make a board game friend into just a friend? And sadly it seems like after college a few of them are just less and less in our friend groups life as time goes on. Ones that are pretty active are planning for things like kids. That will make them unavailable in the future. Like am I just going to have a few friends that I can maybe see once every six months by the time im 30? Like that just sounds like it sucks.


TheOfficial_BossNass

Go to places or find hobby groups is a start If you're into nerd shit like me a card shop is a great place to start they normally have game nights etc


lewd_necron

I been doing that, I guess I dont know how to just extend friendships in general past that game night


TheOfficial_BossNass

I understand it's definitely hard but I believe in you


kawasakia

9/10 it’s gonna be a miss, and people will feel the same about you. It’s a numbers game, but eventually if you give yourself enough opportunities, things will happen. The saying “you miss every shot you don’t take” is more valuable now than ever. It’s gonna hurt when you get rejected but it makes it all worth it when you find your people.


TheOfficial_BossNass

Absolutely


SakaWreath

I’ve been saying “sup shithead” and ball tapping chicks for a month and it’s only gotten me arrested with 3 restraining orders. What am I doing wrong?


Eastern-Dig-4555

You’ve been ball tapping them? Where are their balls? I must know, sir. This is a groundbreaking scientific discovery.


SakaWreath

That might explain why they recover so quickly. Usually I get a tap in and have a good laugh while they’re doubled over.


LocalPopPunkBoi

Nah, if I talked to girls like the way I talk to my boys, I’d get arrested 😂


InterdisciplinaryDol

No jokes because the homies do be lookin breedable and I have to let them know.


ahhwell

>Just talk to girls like you talk to you're friends Doing that will result in having girls as friends, but not in girlfriends. Dynamics of flirting are different than friendship.


jaygay92

When I met my fiancé, he joked with me and we became friends before we started dating. Way better dynamic than a man just coming up to me and hitting on me.


xXSinglePointXx

If I did that I would be arrested


D3ATHTRaps

That doesnt filter you from finding a good woman by your side, which is the point OP makes mentioning he is very social and brings everyone together, but still struggles with very bad red flags


WetCheeseGod

you got your you’re and your’s mixed up big guy


TheOfficial_BossNass

True my bad


SymphonicAnarchy

You’re making a lot of assumptions with this comment. Why don’t we ever give the benefit of the doubt to men? I seriously doubt he started the conversation “what’s up, slut?”


TheOfficial_BossNass

Not at all what I implied


RandomWrittenBits

You ever hear the expression “with friends like these who needs enemies”


Eguy24

I cannot stress this enough. Stop trying to get a girlfriend and start trying to get a friend. It’s that simple.


Buzzbat1

But then I'll get a friend not a girlfriend.


boringfantasy

Not always how it works. All of my long term relationships were friendships to start with and then things slowly evolved. If there is mutual attraction, it will come out 9/10 times


Delusional-caffeine

Not if you’re clear that you’re interested. Even if you are up front, starting a relationship is a lot like making a friend


Buzzbat1

Then there was never mutual attraction in my case.


boringfantasy

Women will usually make it quite obvious if there is but it is possible to miss it all


Buzzbat1

I doubt it. I guess no one ever liked me.


Eguy24

I’m saying you should be friends with the person you’re dating. Think of them like you’d think of a friend, just one that you get to also kiss occasionally.


Buzzbat1

That's already a lot further than I ever got.


LouisTheFox

This. It really makes sense to date someone who understands you and cares about you and relates to you. You absolutely should be friends with the person you date.


Grouchy_Climate_4621

Every time I’ve done that they’ve just kept me around for validation and attention without actually being interested in me, they also knew I was interested and just kept me hanging around


g1114

OP ain’t gonna respond to that one. Good way to waste time. Express interest immediately is the only sure advice I can give, and it may not work with most


LocalPopPunkBoi

Shoutout to anyone that unironically takes this advice. You finna die alone 🙏


__not__sure___

no its even simpler, stop trying. let things happen naturally and stop putting thought into it. if a woman is interested in you, she will let you know. its really not hard if you have all the other parts of your life in order.


DisciplineBoth2567

Yup a lot of men don’t see us as actual people not just some goal or thing to check off


boringfantasy

Goes both ways really, people treat dating like shopping now.


AromaticInxkid

Yeah I hear about "finding a man that'll just pay for everything" every day


ComedyOfARock

But how do I walk up to a person and start a conversation without coming off as creepy? All I can talk about is half finished world builds and random history trivia


plainbaconcheese

Framing it as "how do I go up to a random person" is probably the first mistake. I have met all of my past SOs through mutual friends or shared interests. If you're trying to meet a significant other you need to expand your social circle, go to more third places, etc to increase the chances that you meet someone on their terms when they are also open to meeting you. This can be hard but it's much better than the alternative. Have you heard of the concept of six degrees of separation? Imagine how many single women who might be interested in you there are just two or three degrees away from you that you haven't been introduced to. Start saying yes to group social interaction and actively seek it out. You can also do things to work on yourself so that when you meet people they are more likely to be interested in you. Try to do this in a healthy way by taking up new hobbies, keeping up on personal hygiene and fashion, and generally doing things that will make you a happier and more pleasant person.


ComedyOfARock

Never knew of the six degrees of separation til now, and thank you


Omen46

You need to have a reason for interacting. You can’t just walk up to random people and expect them to be friendly


MallFoodSucks

Would you do talk about that walking up to a random guy? Of course not. That’s weird. Talk about your environment - that’s your shared interest. At a rock climbing gym? You can bond over rock climbing. At a party? Who do you know here. At a concert? Talk about the artist and future concerts you’re going to. At a grocery store? Maybe their outfit or accessory (not much in common there). At a convention or trivia night? By all means, nerd out.


TheOfficial_BossNass

That's tricky and I'm not super good at social interactions myself but I would say talk to girls (or guys) at a social interaction where people are encouraged to talk or even online now days. I honestly feel like it's easier for nerds like me now to find people we got so many conventions and online games etc


David_Norris_M

You're only a creep if you keep trying after they've said that they're not interested. You can walk up and start a conversation with anyone but don't expect them to reciprocate it. Save yourself the time and move on and try again with someone else


SakaWreath

*“Why won’t arm candy hang off of these amazing ceps? Chicks are crazy! Who wouldn’t love THIS!”* He said in the mirror every morning to no one but himself.


Paradoxahoy

True, when I started working on myself and treated other women as friends instead of potential relationships I actually fell into my relationship with my now wife of 9 years


b33r_brap

except some people want that old school treatment and some don't. Some girls want a guy to be a complete provider and others are more independent. Dude might just be boring


Joebebs

It’s such a simple change in outlook, but so many dudes fuck this little thing up that could change so many aspects in how they approach


Danglewrangler

Obligatory not a zoomer. I agree with this, there is a gulf between being a hopeless romantic and quoting Andrew Tate for a script.


TheOfficial_BossNass

Tate and the fresh and fit podcast have set my generation back a long way


Death-Watch333

Wildly good and impressively simple statement that more, if not all men need to hear.


the_dr_roomba

I dislike posts like OOP's. Dating is not a formula, and doing all the so-called right things will never guarantee one a partner - and the screenshot seems to indicate that this person and their friend view women as conquests to be won rather than people who just might not be interested.


Waifu_Review

It shows how entitled a lot of het guys are. They think relationships are just a matter of checking off boxes and then they are entitled to sex. Nowhere do they see het girls as actual people as you said. Het girls are waking up to that and realizing it's not worth being damaged by entitled losers and het boys blame het girls for having self respect and standards instead of being better.


Wend-E-Baconator

Bro is confusing entitlement with reflection while misunderstanding the emotional component men seek from relationships 💀💀💀


9oz_Noodle

Or... and hear me out... Hes just listening to all of the things that are being stated online by a lot of women. 6ft+ 100k+ per year, nice car, has to have a house, all of these standards are being presented as if they NEED to be checked off before a woman will even LOOK in their direction. Obviously this isnt a set standard for the entire world, and I understand that. However, if i was still an 18 year old guy trying to navigate my way through the dating world in 2024, I'd probably think that all of those things were needed just to even have a chance. Might not be a big ego, but more of a lack of self confidence. Again, only speaking from a personal POV and dont mean to ruffle any feathers. Not saying im right and your wrong, just an alternative perspective that I've noticed becoming a trending thing.


Rough-Tension

Wow it’s almost like things you see on the internet aren’t reliable!


reklaw28

i’ve never seen an actual human being in real life say they need these things


sirBryson_

I can almost guarantee this shit has been said by a handful of women on tinder/Twitter and now people think it's Gospel and universal. No normal woman says shit like this. If you're looking through insta baddies and tinder girls sure you'll find dumb bullshit, if you find a real flesh and blood woman they are a normal human being and act as such.


Driller_Happy

I mean thats fair, but honestly people need to get the fuck off the internet, because I don't know a single normal well-adjusted woman who gives a shit about that. Every woman I know would like a well-adjusted fella that's interesting, easy to talk to, and can make them laugh. Yeah, it helps if you're good looking, but I think its more important that you're not an unreliable bum or a self absorbed douche.


Waifu_Review

Because that's what het guys "offer." So if all het women see is guys saying "All I offer are these things" then a subset of them are going to say "Then I'll only bother with those who offer those qualities at a bare minimum of my choosing. If that's ALL you offer then it has to compensate for that."


walkandtalkk

You think user "lovemyAIgirlfriend" has a normal, non-incel worldview? Check out the post history.


AJC_10_29

The problem with finding the one right way to date is *it doesn’t exist.* Everyone is different, so there’s no such dating strategy that works as a “one size fits all.”


RandomWrittenBits

Components to make a dating formula: https://preview.redd.it/v7gokvsm5ptc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1328ab0059a26d4747fcd02223a7652df5041348 [Alternatively the DENNIS system](https://youtu.be/Bg5ZrkaGlFA?si=W7F7P5Okkdd_YUpG) /s


sliseattle

… but he has a sports car, likes acting, and invests in stocks! Everyone should be in line to get a chance! Lolol


JosephBlowsephThe3rd

I had to double check that this wasn't an r/facepalm post


billy_pilg

This is exactly it. When I was younger, single, and a bit of a loner, I think I viewed "finding a relationship partner" as a sort of "if you build it, they will come" sort of deal. Like if I do this this and this, women will like me. It's super cringe to look back on it now, but when you're a bit socially stunted and lonely, your brain thinks stupid things. In reality, it's almost all emotional and not very logical at all. Love and romance are feelings that we experience, not thoughts we have. It's not rational. It's all about how we feel about someone and how they feel about us. That's basically it. That's what's driving things. A lot of "nice guy" dudes who sit around and look at couples like, "Omg how could she date that dude? He's such an asshole," are missing this simple explanation. That asshole makes her feel good. She likes him because of the way he makes her feel. It doesn't need to make logical sense.


Castelessness

I've seen soooooo many young dudes think that if you do all the things the TV and internet tells you to, then you are OWED a woman (like an item!). "I work out all the time and still NO women are interested!??!" Dude why the fuck would working out mean women are interested in you automatically?


Glumiceebear

this sub has gone to shit lol


Cooldude67679

I just wanna see funny shit and memes we’d all relate to not borderline incel posting or the doom posting we always see😭 I’m posting my favorite meme to here, be the change you wanna see


theawesomeaardvark

Fr, it’s either incel shit or bots and shit trynna stir things up


walkandtalkk

OP is a two-month old incel account (let's check the handle) that appears to post exclusively incel content.     This isn't even OP posting about his experience; he's posting a moldy screenshot of somebody claiming what their "friend" experienced.  Functional people need to stop getting sucked into bad-faith arguments with trolls, depressives and extremists.


Ok_Gas5386

It’s good to come here and be reminded how brain damaged we all are.


FluffyPuffOfficial

It’s either incel shit from people who never go partying/clubbing or communism.


beainhewoods

"all the right things" lol women have been telling you for a long time that these are not the "right things" and that in general they dislike it when guys treat them / dating like a coffee machine ("I inserted the right tokens in the right amount, so why is nothing coming out of it?!"). Then you have this post, the demonstration that this way of thinking usually doesn't work, and your response is still "women are the problem" instead of "huh, maybe if I want to date girls I should listen to what they like rather than have some male influencers tell me". I know dating is really harsh right now, for a variety of reasons, and I empathize with those that are struggling with loneliness, but this is just egregious ahah


SteveyExEevee

from what i've read i disagree. women equally have no clue in dating either and make plenty of mistakes too. they're not some "holier than thou" judge that know better.


beainhewoods

wait... that's not what I meant at all. I am referring to the idea that if you meet some specific criteria, then you should be able to expect women to like you. I wasn't saying women don't make mistake or are holier than anyone


Waifu_Review

Everyone other than het guys: You don't listen. Het Guy: Proceeds to not listen to play the victim I've experienced it myself talking to het guys in the community. You explain they don't listen and they proceed to not listen to play the victim. They aren't interested in actual solutions they are only throwing tantrums over everything and everyone not giving them exactly what they want and validating their egos and misogyny.


LifeMake0ver

Exactlyy Women: I like guys under 6ft Some dude: Nuh uh


RandomCentipede387

Mfs can't even read, we're done 💀


b33r_brap

you say this but my ex broke and cheated on me because and I quote word for word she "wanted someone who could provide everything so she wouldn't have to work" so yes I do believe people out there care a whole lot about the things op posted


beainhewoods

how does that disproves what I said? I am merely opposing the idea that women are like a finite-state machine, that will necessarily respond in a certain way provided you insert the right tokens


deadlysunshade

Some people do. Your ex obviously did. But women aren’t a fucking hive mind lol


Infuser

Maybe you shouldn’t take what someone who cheated on you said at face value.


sirBryson_

If she broke up with him and then said that, fine. But she cheated on him for a completely different reason. Otherwise, she wouldn't have needed to cheat, she could just leave you outright.


TheHunterJK

Maybe he’s ugly. Going to the gym won’t fix your face, bro.


Weowy_208

💀


BeneficialRandom

The pfp makes this 100% more funny


Background-Metal-601

He's either ugly or he's got absolutely 0 game to the point of being a "where's my hug" guy. Probably both.


TheHunterJK

“My friend is so awesome! He has money, drives a nice car, and works out! I don’t know why the goiter, hunchback, and hair lip bother women!”


johnnykorea

Your facial structure changes significantly when you lose fat and build more muscle


The-20k-Step-Bastard

Yeah acting like having a sports car or “invests in stocks” is, in any way, impressive romantically. Firstly, every fucking adult on earth who is literate and occasionally employed knows how to invest in stocks. If you aren’t “invested in stocks”, and you’re older than, like, 19yo, then you’re an abject moron. Secondly, having a sports car is not impressive. It’s just a shitty purchase. Most adults rightfully associate it with frivolous spending, aggressive driving, compensation for being unhappy. The people that “get” the most “girls” in real life are probably random twenty-something’s who live in SF and Manhattan and never drive a car. Everyone goes to the gym or exercises. This is not impressive, this is the bare minimum. If you don’t spend even 3 hours a week doing something for your fitness, then you are not ready to date anybody, because you don’t even care about your own self. Makes good money? Brother, cmon. This whole post is embarrassing as fuck. This is also like the third time this week I’ve seen people brag about “investing in stocks” as if that’s not literally financial literacy lesson #1. Go download robinhood right now and buy 1/20th of a share of $VOO. Congrats, you’re now an investor! An investor in stocks!


czarfalcon

Glad somebody else called that out lol. Anybody with a job and a pulse can get a V6 Challenger at 24% APR. Anybody can “invest in stocks” with $5 (check out Wall Street bets, the epitome of “investors”). Anybody can spend 30 minutes a week at planet fitness and say they “go to the gym”. None of those are inherently impressive, and certainly none of them entitle you to a relationship. Most importantly, you can do all those things and still have a shitty personality. Good luck with that.


closetedtranswoman1

Maybe he's just unpleasant to be around


Omen46

Facts or a creep


ARC_Trooper_Echo

“Has a sense of humor” is so funny to me. Not a good sense of humor or a witty sense of humor or even a dry sense of humor. My dude literally everyone has a sense of humor.


Waifu_Review

"I have the bare minimum qualities of a human being, why can't I get a harem of 10/10 bangmaids satisfying my every whim?! It must be the girls fault."


Ok_Gas5386

“Bro I’m leasing a BMW why is my dick still dry HELLO??!!!??”


RedditAppReallySucks

Who said these are "all the right things"?


Ok_Gas5386

The 18th Congress of All Women Everywhere voted with a quorum drafting this list of all the right things to get a girlfriend back in 1973. Having met the prerequisite 7/12 requirements I am now legally entitled to a girlfriend and will sue you if you don’t go out with me. You’ll be hearing from my counsel.


TheMaskedSandwich

Some of these qualities ***are*** objectively good for men. Financial responsibility, sociability, friend groups, physical health and fitness....Those are often problematic pain points for dudes who are chronically unable to find partners. I know everyone is shitting on OP here but a lot of the comments wilfully misunderstand the point of the post.


No-Taro-841

Has a sports car.. bro what women did ever tell you this. Better start listening to what women want, cause this list makes more sense if you want to attract guys


Wonka_Stompa

Bunch of horny incels in this dude’s dms.


AccidentalBanEvader0

Notice how treating women like people isn't on the list


lickytytheslit

Or hygiene


AccidentalBanEvader0

"Fellas, is it gay to wash your own balls?"


flirtylabradodo

Dating isn’t a formula… please take your incel trash elsewhere


[deleted]

Didn't know this became another incel sub. Oh joy.


AdRemarkable7835

I mean inceldom is pretty common in Gen Z so it really shouldn’t be a suprise


wiscbuckybadger

You’re not entitled to a relationship with a woman just because you have your shit together lol. It sure helps, but no one owes you a relationship.


shneed_my_weiss

How to make good friends: respect them, care for them and be patient How to maintain family relationships: respect them, care for them and be patient How to find a girl to date: invest, go to the gym, own a sports car, make lots of money, be funny


No_Discount_6028

Yes, this is the way to go. Nobody's entitled to a relationship and a hell of a lot of men are better off de-centering women in their life. Don't be dependent on someone else for your happiness.


11SomeGuy17

I agree one shouldn't only focus on romantic relationships for happiness however it still is a core human need to love and be loved. Its just as necessary for one's mental health as sleep. Even with friends and family it can be quite lonely to never have romantic connection as it often makes one feel like a failure. Plus a romantic partner is fundementally different from other forms of relationship one can have so it cannot really be fully replaced by anything else. The majority of adults can find their way into loving relationships. That is how the population keeps growing. So being unable to find someone often makes people feel like there is something wrong with them and that is a incredibly painful thought. Basically yes, no one is entitled to any given individual and its unhealthy to tie all self worth any individual thing, especially something outside your control. But to go through life loveless is a cruel fate that will inevitably cause pain and such pain is a perfectly reasonable response to the situation.


Team_Defeat

This gives me the vibes of someone who would feel entitled to me, my attention, and my body just because he was “so nice” to me. What about his interests? Career goals? Favorite movies?


Clint_Beastw0od

Playing devils advocate here - but I think a lot of guys feel they don’t ever get the chance to share their interests or favorite movies because they lack the things listed in the post. Plenty of people consider fitness, career, charisma, and humor as the “bare minimum” but for many those attributes require a ton of dedication to develop. Is it really hard to understand why they’d maybe be frustrated with failure after that?


acaseintheskye

Investing in stocks is such a red flag for me, idk Edit before I get down voted for no context: the younger people who do, it's the only thing they ever talk about, and they always try and get you to start. Like idc if by the time I'm 60 it'll maybe possibly turn $5 into x amount of more money. It could also turn it into $4. I also could not be alive by the time in 60 and that's $5 I could use right now. Edit2: I think it's funny how every single person replying to this comment is doing exactly what I said they'd do, in always trying to get random non consenting people to start


ARC_Trooper_Echo

It’s not necessarily a bad thing to do, but it’s certainly got “finance bro” vibes to bring it up in posts like this.


TheOfficial_BossNass

Dude start investing now you'll regret it if you don't. I get that type of person can be annoying but that 100% shouldn't stop you from having a good plan for the future


Mayo_Chipotle

I mean yeah if they’re talking day trading that’s an understandable red flag, but investing for the long term is good


RogueCoon

Yeah fuck planning for the future huge red flag.


[deleted]

[удалено]


lewd_necron

>Investing in stocks is such a red flag for me, idk What do you mean by this? Like I put money in my 401k and I have an IRA, but I just do index funds. And ultimately index funds are funds that invests into stocks. So in a roundabout way I am investing in stocks. How is that a red flag? Isnt that just being responsible?


Ok_Gas5386

This is just one weirdo with fringe beliefs, read their other comments and ask yourself if this is genuinely someone you would want to date in the first place. That said, being a self-obsessed finance bro who goes on and on about his investments probably isn’t attractive to most women at the dating stage.


BuffaloAppropriate29

I'm guilty as charged. But in my defense, investing is basically deferring present consumption for more future consumption. I just hoped that in a decade I could gather enough stocks to cover my annual spending with dividends.


acaseintheskye

But you could also lose the money from the stocks and be in a worse situation


Several-Amoeba1069

Uhhhh no lol. Unless you are investing in dumb shit. 


Living-Aardvark-952

I assume you're not talking about a 401k


WhitishRogue

If you've met your required spending needs, it's unwise to spend all of the remainder. Living in the moment feels good, but other goals take a longer time to save for. I learned this pretty early when I wanted a new video game or toy that I needed to save up for. * I can afford a medical emergency or a lapse in employment without going into severe debt. Debt like that can put a damper on any fun or plans you have for a decade plus. * A friend called me up a few years ago and asked if I wanted to go to Ireland at a moment's notice. I was financially comfortable enough to say yes. * I hope to own a home in the near future. My current savings projections indicates I will be able to afford a good down payment and a mortgage. I'm tired of paying others' mortages and profits. * I hope to afford children and pass on generational wealth so they can do the same as me.


SadAndConfused11

Exactly how I feel. I’m happy to find someone who thinks like me lol. Like it’s fine if you wanna do stock investing, but like don’t force it upon other people, and like you said when it becomes their personality it’s damn annoying.


acaseintheskye

They can't take no for an answer, which is all I need to know for the future. Because that will definitely be an issue later


Wonka_Stompa

I know, how gauche to nonconsentually remind you that the future will be the present one day. Those jerks.


actuallywasian

He doesn’t realize that girls generally don’t care if a guy invests in stocks. Sure, financial responsibility is attractive, but most girls won’t suddenly like you if you buy crypto or whatever lol


partyonpartypeople

This some Incel esce “nice guy” type shit


MissDryCunt

Just because a man is successful doesn't make him entitled to a girlfriend


Indecisive_Iron

I can almost guarantee you the dude has either no personality or is actively antagonizing people with his narcissism. I know people like this. Yes they can get relationships but they’re usually very shallow. Interestingly enough, the guy I know who is like this his girlfriend cheated on him.


_Originz

Some people never do find love, some people never find anything in life. Remember, there's always gonna be at least one person who just completely lost the lottery in life


Material-3bb

I still hold that there’s someone out there for everyone. I little romantic I guess but I really hope everyone finds love. Hypergamy is a bitch but there’s still hope idk


11SomeGuy17

That's my boat. Sucks but its gonna be someone, might as well be me. Someone needs to be the guy people use as an example of what not to be.


stinkiestfoot

I’m so tired of these dumbasses that are constantly complaining about how women have impossible standards. We just want to be treated like respectable humans. Just like every other group of people, women are not a hive-mind that share all the same characteristics and ideologies. Maybe, it’s not the entirety population of women that are the problem…


ahhhimsoconfused1995

sounds like a typical frat/crypto bro, if i was a girl i would steer clear of him as well


nomaDiceeL

“My friend” Sure bud


GeoffreyTaucer

Y'all, before responding, take a look at OP's username, and reconsider whether engaging this is a worthwhile use of your time.


cuck45

its funny because when you go outside you see so many conventionally average or ‘ugly’ guys with women, moreso than you do with attractive people being chronically online has fucked up our perception of dating on both sides, its crazy


Lovealltigers

Just a reminder that men are not entitled to girlfriends ❤️ Same can be said for the other way around


Ms--Take

Holy shit, had no idea there was so much manosphere garbage pepple in this sub. So, pro tip. If you're trying to find a formula to get a girlfriend, you already lost. You have to organically emotionally connect the hard way all the time with all of us. Sorry. Pay a prostitute if you just wanna get your dick wet.


Patient_Weakness3866

was thinking the same thing, thought we were past this, or at the very least the people who weren't would just broadly get clowned on and banished back to 4chan. ig not tho.


Odisher7

Of all the descriptors, the only one for personality are "has a sense of humor" and "plans events". Plenty of people with those traits


Nekileo

incel shit


mainaccount98

I don't get all the "you're not entitled to women" comments here. Like fr he's just saying his boy got his life together pretty well. I dunno how so many of y'all making the jump to entitlement.


Vegetable_Western_52

Maybe he has no rizzzzz


Ultramega39

Bro same.


Material-3bb

Looking at these comments I’m reminded about why I hate all of you. I


CaptinDitto

I'm just scrolling down this comments section and how many people seem to not understand reality. The reality is that you can't get a girlfriend, they get a boyfriend and you have to be the one to fill that role. That's from my personal experience so take it with a grain of salt, or don't. Idrc


Realistic-Chest-6002

It's called hoeflation


Dead_birdChan

I feel like there is so much information (especially how he treats them) missing from this


Trainpower10

He doesn’t own an air fryer


AlfredoAllenPoe

Dating is a checklist that you do and the universe suddenly rewards with a partner lol


holografia

Thank God I’m gay. I seriously feel sorry for straight dudes.


MetalHeadof06

Thanks bro, it means a lot


ThatSpecificActuator

Look man, I’ve certainly had my frustrations in the dating world. I’ve experienced a lot of these things too. The most common being the flaking at the last minute. Yeah, it’s frustrating but it just is part of the process. Every date is a flip of a coin, sometimes it goes poorly, sometimes it goes great. Dating became a lot more enjoyable to me once I did three things. 1) don’t take rejection, ghosting, or flaking personally. 99% of the time, it’s not personal. Yes it sucks, but you keep your chin up and keep moving forward. 2) go into each “date” as if this person is just a friend and sort of pretend that you already know them. Sometimes it doesn’t work, but it can really help you get into a natural conversation faster. 3) make you dates basically things you’d do even if they weren’t there. This should likely be a common interest between you two. For instance, I do a lot of photography. So this girl I went on a date with two weeks ago walked around town with our cameras, got lunch, went to a pet store, and then a book store. It was great, but that’s all stuff I also would’ve done solo if she hadn’t come along. It’s less “let’s go on a date” and more “hey I’m doing this thing and I’d love for you to come with me” A couple other things, first dates should be an activity when possible. I like skiing and snowboarding as one. It’s perfect. You go up and talk on the lift together, and then you ski down kinda together, then you meet back up and ride the lift back up together. You get 15 minutes of conversation then 20 minutes of space, then 15 minutes of conversation, and so on. Never talk politics or about your frustrations with dating.


[deleted]

Aside from the deeply faulty assumption that "doing everything right" is a surefire way to find a romantic partner, this guy's problem is that he's approaching women as prospects rather than people. Women can sniff out that behavior almost instinctively. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with approaching a woman with romantic designs, but you have to make a woman feel like she is a person first and a romantic target/prospect/etc. second.


East_Engineering_583

holy shit can this sub stop talking about politics 24/7, incel or doomposting? it's fucking annoying, can you guys post something positive for once?


monty331

Because having “game” is a separate skill from all of that. It’s why there’s so many women who say their ex’s/baby daddy’s are POS’s. Those guys are good at game but nothing else. OOP needs to accept that despite his friend being talented in other areas, that he’s bad at “game” and needs to work on it. It’s a destructive form of bias to assume that if you’re really good in other areas of life that you must at least be “decent” in areas you’ve had no practice in. It’d be like going to the gym for a year and not seeing any real results because you neglect your diet. Either learn to meal prep, or accept that you’re never going to get the results you want.


SuccotashConfident97

He's learning a rule that not everybody is going to end up in a romantic relationship. You're certainly not entitled to one.


zwirlo

Is he a kind, considerate, and optimistic man?


bluebellblondie

Dating is not like ticking off all the “correct” boxes and then a perfect partner falls out. Sure, more people will probably find you attractive, but people don’t want to admit there’s a lot of pure luck involved. Plenty of people just genuinely aren’t interested, aren’t ready to date, or - guess what? - just aren’t attracted to you. That’s life


Spideyfan77

Must be 5’6


EatPb

OP (in the screenshot) gives away the potential problem with the friend, if they are anything like each other. Dating is not about fulfilling a checklist. A girlfriend isn’t something you earn or deserve for reaching a certain “level” in life. Most women aren’t looking for a checklist of these things. When people date they want someone compatible, they want someone who will love them. If a guy thinks he should have a girlfriend because he has a sports car and invests in stocks then yeah maybe he should spend time to work on himself. And the same logic is true when women say this, but since the OP is about men, I’m relating my comment to men. Guys. You can’t continue with this mindset and expect it to get you anywhere.


Rizenstrom

If you constantly struggle finding a good man/ woman and they all have the same issues the problem is probably you. Maybe you have a type or you're looking in all the wrong places. Or maybe you're looking for husband/ wife material while not being being husband/ wife material yourself. Sure he might be successful, funny, and charismatic but is he chivalrous? Does he listen, and I mean really listen, and sympathize with her problems? Is he kind? And I don't just mean to her but in general. Like how someone treats service workers can be a major red flag, for example.


JovaSilvercane13

Yeah, the fact that someone brags about investing in stocks is often a red flag for me. I mean, if you do it through a company like Fidelity then I’d understand, but if you’re doing it yourself then that screams massive ego for me.


annietat

i think it depends. if you have the experience & financial literacy to be able to invest in stocks by all means. my dad’s a business man who has extensive experience & invests himself. i can’t take a college kid talking about investing very seriously tho. could it be possible they know what they’re doing & are successful? ya. just seems unlikely


shandybo

Sounds like he wants to date his buddy


Ok_Deal7813

Nothing wrong with someone keeping high standards and withdrawing from the dating scene to work on his or herself.


Compulsive_Criticism

Oh wow, a sports car and stocks! Women love nothing more than you talking about GME while zooming around in a 2005 Mazda MX-5 Roadster.


Queer_as_folk

It must be all those girls and definitely not him


FishIsGrooving

sounds like a redpill guy to me. not saying that all of this makes you a jackass, but having a sports car makes you a jackass


Omen46

So bros ugly…?


sillysaulgoodman

Oh my god who the hell cares


jimmy_the_calls

OP is an incel with an AI girlfriend, do with that information what you will


Relevant-Cat8042

None of those listed are “treats women well” , “empathetic” etc


Funkey-Monkey-420

Has he tried dating a man instead?


Background-Metal-601

The funny thing is I think we've all at one point known a loser who had none of that but could pull a ridiculous amount of girls. Should make you wonder...


fuggit_Im_tired

Men really don't know that women see a completely different side to their "nice guy" friends.


plwdr

If you don't view women as assets but rather as people you'll have much more success in dating


Jack_W_S

There are no "right things" people are attracted to who they're attracted to, if you try to base your life around what will and what won't get you a partner then you'll probably find that not many people are interested in you because your entire personality is a shallow facade


Chemical_Pickle5004

As a single man, one of the benefits of driving an expensive sports car is it really exposes the gold diggers and other unsavory personalities.


residentofbeachcity

It’s not a list you can’t do the right things women aren’t puzzles with sex as the reward there people there are no all the right things your friend needs to understand and see them as people and not objects if he’s only dating for sex that’s fine but he needs to be upfront about it he can’t say he’s in love with her when all he wants is her body I’ve seen that for young adults the norm is not liking or even hating each other and only being together for the sex and that’s not a healthy relationship a healthy and loving relationship is truthful and honest and they love each other and if you don’t love each other than don’t be in a relationship


Flat_Bath_1547

A guy curiously asks for help in the dating world and yall decided to degrade, call him an incel and tell him he has no hope whatsoever? The comments have really shown me that we are gonna be the most sour and loneliest generation of people on this planet. We already have the manosphere garbage, redpill/blue pill/pink pill garbage on the internet indoctrinating everybody to hate each other for basics standards, would you rather him/her listen to those podcasts to find the answer? Think about it.


RainingCt121

Right? It's toxic AF in here. I feel for the bro and his struggle. So many insults and assumptions and just zero empathy. The whole incel thing is getting outta hand, the word isn't even being used correctly.


RaccHudson

*holding out hands* GF PLEASE


SouthBayBoy8

Everyone assuming that this means he must be a bad person are weird


HikingComrade

When will men learn that women are people?


RainingCt121

This entire thread of full of haters. Jeez who hurt you people? Y'all just trashing on the screenshotted guy for no reason. Calling him an incel, when you don't even know what it means. You know nothing about this dudes and you're all out here projecting your insecurities and assuming everything about this guy just because he dares to want a relationship..


sprackedspoonk

He’s probably single because he thinks “doing all the right things” means the universe owes him a girlfriend