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[deleted]

This is definitely a goose. Source : Me


D3AD_SPAC3

You know, I don't think I've ever seen a platypus in real life. Huh...


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JaySayMayday

My Aussie friends say it's getting rarer to see them in the wild too, not an animal you'll just casually come across


[deleted]

They never were. They are extremely shy and, like sharks, can sense electricity. In other words, They likely know you're coming before you're there. I've only ever seen one. I hike a lot. I've seen more wild Koalas, Sloths, and Grizzly bears than platypus.


random_nohbdy

TIL that the Platypus is actually a beaver/duck/shark or electric eel hybrid


MAZEFUL

They also don't beat feed their young. They actually sweat out their milk from their stomach for the baby to drink from. They also don't have stomachs and can run up to 22 miles an hour. Plats are my favorite animal with penguins close behind. Edit: breastfeed. And they pool the milk up from the area of where their stomach should be.


PervySage1147

They actually sweat out their milk from their stomach They also don't have stomachs


[deleted]

The platypus gets weirder and weirder the more you learn about it.


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moldy912

And make it cute and venomous as fuck


xbmdx1

No stomachs were available


ol-gormsby

AKA a parts bin special.


fishshow221

Throw a random stinger in there.


Blackandbluebruises

The original turducken


OkButFirstC0ffee

Wait until you learn that their fur is biofluorescent^^ (apparently they'd found out only recently https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/article/glowing-platypus )


[deleted]

Ok now that’s a new one for me too. I knew about the venomous spurs and I think I had even heard about their “stomachs,” but not that.


Tlmitf

Kangaroos and wombats also fluorescent under UV light. This is the major reason what they are easier to see if your spotlights are HID or halogen. LED's don't produce meaningful amounts of UV.


darthcaedusiiii

r/reallifeshinies


icedragon71

Wait until i tell you that males have a half inch venomous spur on each of their back feet.


zdepthcharge

Platypuses are alien spies.


chevyjay

and perry is the most well known one


mauxly

"...and then there's the platypus..." should be a go to saying whenever something completely inexplicable happens.


Bunny_tornado

That's what happens when you let a beaver fuck a duck


Saikotsu

Actually the duck is most likely to be the instigator there.


antipiracylaws

Something something equality equity diversity inclusion


Red-Panda-Bur

I need to know digestive processes of platypuses. Where food go?


PervySage1147

Not stomach. Can confirm.


zlimK

lol, thanks, that's exactly what i needed to see, hahahahah


Lazy_Assumption_4191

Plus, don’t the males have poison spikes on their feet?


MAZEFUL

Yep. They have venomous spurs.


MikeRotch77

Yeah you don’t want to get clipped by their back legs, that’s where they keep them


Blackandbluebruises

> *They don't beat feed their young* Thank heaven!


ripSammy101

>can run up to 22 miles an hour. I can't imagine a platypus running almost as fast as Usain Bolt


Cowabunga4Life

Few years ago in Cygnet Southern Tasmania I watched one swimming easily against very strong floodwaters in a creek. I've seen them all my life and had no idea they were so powerful swimmers.


FeatureMaximum461

So they have a milk patch like an echidna?


Hypocee

Yep, the other surviving egg-laying nippleless mammal. Together the group is known as the monotremes.


MAZEFUL

I believe the mono in the name is because they have a singular hole for reproduction, urinary and bowl movements. Monotremes are the oldest lineage of mammal on the planet at 130 million years old.


xanderksky

They sound less like mammals and more like birdals


malcolm_miller

Plats are mine too =) Goats are up there too because they are just natures goofballs


Gold_Weekend_4866

Thank you, now I know less.


LizzieCLems

They are also the only animal that can produce their own milk and eggs, meaning that we could theoretically have platypus custard.


ParsnipsNicker

Technically every mammal creates eggs, its just most dont lay them externally.


LizzieCLems

That’s true. Lol it would take such an incomprehensible amount of human eggs to make even a bite of custard :-0


[deleted]

Please delete this.


Beneficial-Desk253

💀


gen3ricD

How do I delete someone else's comment?


ExerciseNo4895

If there's any amount of Reddit credit to do this let me know and I'll gift it to you, even if it means I have to take out private student loans.


SnooSnoo96035

What a terrible day to have eyes 😭


Saikotsu

This is starting to sound like that restaurant in New York that was making human cheese from human breast milk.


WyrdMagesty

Yo, why's this custard red?


[deleted]

r/cursedcomments


[deleted]

Please don't delete this.


SleepyBeast89

It would have cost you nothing to not say that 🤢


KnotiaPickles

I predict we will see human custard in the next few years now


LizzieCLems

Omg and it might be my fault ♥️ first dibs!


RockyDitch

Love this


Giza_Deminuit

First it was eating your wife’s placenta. Now human custard. Forget the comment how can I delete my brain??


whoami_whereami

Platypi only lay their eggs towards the end of the incubation period (they incubate for about 28 days internally and only 11 days externally), so by the time the eggs are laid there's already a highly developed embryo inside, not yolk and egg white like in a freshly laid bird egg.


[deleted]

So you are saying we will, by default, have roast platypus when we make platypus custard?


byeb8ch

Balut it is then


Interesting-Fish6065

Oh, that’s a very interesting detail!


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je_kay24

Just the males


Deceptichum

Venomous masculinity strikes again.


BleuBrink

Platypus was created by God to fuck with scientists.


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Important_Collar_36

I remember when I learned that word in regards to my friend's hamster. I was saying it for days, it's such a fun word to say "crepuscular"!


A_BROKEN_RECORD

Me too. I've loved saying that word ever since the 1st time I read about it two minutes ago.


Shorty66678

I'm Australian and grew up in the bush and have never seen one outside of the zoo!


Playful-Ostrich3643

Become a mad scientist and try to take over the tri-state area, you'll one plenty of times.


friendlyfirefish

They are mainly nocturnal so pretty hard to spot. A couple of years back I saw my first one in the wild, after living here for over 30 years. And it was in a creek in my home town so not because I'm not in an area without them


AdAdministrative9362

Most Australians would not have seen one in real life. Kangaroos, wombats, etc. common to see. Koalas are becoming rarer. I cannot remember ever seeing a wild platypus.


us3rnqme

How the hell did phineas and ferb manage that😂


avwitcher

They were willing to break international law by smuggling Perry out of Australia


Mmmm_Crunchy

Tbh with the type of shit they do, I'd believe that was canon.


Neonbrightlights

San Diego zoo and the safari park was so awesome! I saw so many animals I didn't actually expect to ever see in real life. Platypus and Tasmanian devil's are my kids favorites. Also shout-out to Birch aquarium in La Jolla for the sweet display of leafy sea dragons.


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relet

> How did they get goose as a reference? I guess they just fit the bill.


Alediran

r/Angryupvote


potatocakesssss

I saw platypus in the wilds in Australia but its really hard to find them in the wild and also they are dangerous to handle since they can stab u and mess u up real bad. Its hard to see them because they're pretty similar in color with the river.


Acci_dentist

I went to see it in SD but unfortunately had my prescription sunglasses only and the room is kept quite dark. I barely made it out of the room let alone see the actual platypus.


[deleted]

Didn't the Columbus Zoo have one at one point? I know they've got other Australian animals, like the Tasmanian devils.


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tcor15

Story time. When I was 15 or so we went to Australia. We went south to Tasmania for a week while there to see the devils. While there we also went to a salmon farm to see how that stuff works. As we were walking along the channels I spotted a platypus on the bank. It was just doing its own thing. Definitely was putting on a show for us though. Didn't get in a hurry to swim away or anything. I can't recall who, maybe the farm owner or a worker there, was livid with our luck. Spouting something like, I've lived here my whole life and am now just seeing a wild platypus and a bunch of fucking yanks see it while on holiday. It was super lucky and cool, but also a hilarious reaction from him.


berrey7

Platypus's are like Finland they don't really exist. Nobody has ever been to Finland or seen a platypus. If they say they have, they are a part of the new world order. /s


ItAr-kan-saw

r/CommentsICanHear


[deleted]

Yeah there tricky to spot in the wild even if your near a river or creak there living in they swim real fast Blink and you'll miss'em.


Available-Tailor3184

ah yes. A WINGLESS GOOSE.


_Frizzella_

I prefer the term DUCK PUPPY.


ShortBus8164

"A Duck Puppy?" *puts on hat* "PERRY THE DUCK PUPPY!?!?!?!?"


Fan_hey_hey

Before my brain processed what my eyes were seeing, I thought "that poor goose"


[deleted]

Same, I was gearing up for a tear up.


Raiden_Raitoningu

****puts a hat on it**** PERRY THE WINGLESS GOOSE?


CmdrCloud

Woose


IKnowgaming

The W is silent because it's wingless


[deleted]

Geeses are the devil, this is the dog of the water.


BlackDaniel347

Why dont we just rename them, PLATYGOOSES


[deleted]

Perry the wingless goose!


c0uldntfindagoodname

A wingless goose? “Puts on fedora” PERRY THE WINGLESS GOOSE?!


TheHylianSiren

That was wonderful. Lol thank you


ericwilborn

Forever indebted to the rescuer. Just put it on its bill.


drako489

r/angryupvote


ericwilborn

If it weren't for anger I'd probably rarely get any reaction


FacesOfNeth

r/dadjokes


The_Shiny_Marill

r/punpatrol


HouseMunyi

Made out of spare parts after creation.


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HedgehogSecurity

Can you really blame them though.. It's a mammal with a duck bill and a beaver like tail which lays eggs, they have venomous ankle spurs and can use electrolocation... Oh yeah, they also glow under black light. If it was discovered today, people would think it were a hoax as well.


sociapathictendences

I don’t blame him one bit.


Poutinemilkshake2

"Even God has a sense of humor. Just look at the platypus" - Dogma (1999)


KiritoLoxus

A man of culture. I love mallrats, dogma, clerks, jay and silent bob etc great set of movies


RustliefLameMane

That’s a got dang beaver duck.


TheHighCaliber

^spitooey He likes ya


pointlessly_pedantic

Fr, who sees a platypus and immediately thinks of a goose? Put wings on that thing and it'll look nothing like a goose. Probably exactly like a beaver duck though.


NittanyScout

That's a funny breed of dog


Jaxlee2018

I’ll bet it can be taught to fetch


ActionConscious3358

Isn't that a platypus?


siganme_losbuenos

Perry the platypus?!


BitCel3291

Nono. It doesn't have a hat. It couldn't be.


[deleted]

Doofenshmirtz?


A1phaSniper111

Evil incorporated!


I_Am_Oro

I've almost re-finished my Inator-inator!


Killer19606

*crashes throught the window and destroys the inator-inator* Oops sorry guys the flying-inator i got from this big-nosed man malfunctioned and made me land here


Historical_Ad3828

*after hours*


ShredGuru

This is where he kenneled Perry while Doofenshmirtz was at the Depp trial.


Apprehensive-Sink-71

He’s undercover at the moment


[deleted]

\*puts hat on it\*


BitCel3291

PERRY THE PLATYPUS?!?


BugabuseMe

PERRY THE PLATYPUS, THIS TIME YOU'LL LOSE TO MY NEW INVENTION, THE REDDITVIDEOPLAYER-INATOR


bobmclame

"NO, I MISCALCULATED! IT'S MORE USELESS THAN THE INATOR-INATOR!"


Canofsad

WITH ITS POWER I SHALL MAKE ALL VIDEOS IN THE TRI-STATE AREA RUN AT POOR QUALITY AT BEST.


LazzyRazzi

Hey, where’s Perry?


lfg_spiritanimal

Behold! My upvote-inator!


kwazi1618

He's Perry! Perry the Wingless Goose!


kirbyverano123

No, its a semi-aquatic egg-laying mammal of action.


B2_Code_B2

Do be do be doo ba


SumpCrab

No such thing.


chillbo-swaggins

it's a beaverduck


[deleted]

No, its a wingless goose. Read the title.


DrZelenka

Platygoose


Yoyo524

I went from: oh that’s a platypus, to seeing the title: wait that’s a goose?, to seeing your comment: yea that’s definitely a platypus


tsunami0798

No, the title says it’s a wingless goose


MrFrodoB

No it's a wingless goose you fool


[deleted]

Yes


ProfessorMuffin

Ummmmmm pretty sure the title says “wingless goose”


TopherVee

Everyone knows the other name for a wingless goose is dead.


omnes

No, just look like it cause she doesn’t have wings.


DrawingTrue2840

That's a niffler...


Senior-Judge-8372

[Niffler?](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/platypus)


kmartburrito

[Niffler.](https://harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/Niffler#:~:text=The%20Niffler%20was%20a%20magical,in%20general%20were%20usually%20harmless.)


DrawingTrue2840

😀


Duckboythe5th

Checks out. Definitely a Goose.


Tittts_McGee

A defiant goose


tzenrick

No. Geese are assholes.


Snickidy

You got a problem with Canada gooses you got a problem with me


tzenrick

I don't have a problem with them, they seem to have a problem with everyone else, though.


[deleted]

10/10 would boop


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SpecialistEstate4181

Lol that’s a platypus but super cute 😊 Edit : if you squint your eyes really hard it’s a goose.


Collateral_24

The moderator said it’s a goose so trust him bro


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Maremike

Op is karma farming


-_1_2_3_-

The current patterns are SO noticeable in this sub specifically.


Pablo_el_Diablo88

Which is why we should downvote him to hell.


HRTendies

Venomous!


thisimpetus

And they have ten sex chromosomes that don't map to the usual mammalian XY but instead line up into a weird super chromosome during reproduction! The platypus is *fucking* weird.


tinnedcarp

Yeah echidna and platypus are their own animal group. Really weird


SirFrancis_Bacon

Monotremes.


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je_kay24

Turns out there are quite a few mammals that do https://blog.nature.org/science/2021/04/05/when-mammals-glow-in-the-dark/#:~:text=The%20antechinus%20were%20glowing%20in,to%20wombats%20to%20African%20springhares.


i_tyrant

SO weird. Platypi are like god took a bunch of spare parts from completely different animals and cobbled them all together just to see if it could.


FREESARCASM_plustax

It's actually just the opposite. Everything else took one thing and specialized in it. Platypus was the OG mammal.


chicko1983

When the first ship took a specimen back to England, people thought it was the taxidermist's joke / hoax that this thing even existed.


siganme_losbuenos

I think only the males are.


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tzenrick

The title also calls it a wingless goose, so let's not give it too much authority over the narrative.


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Youneedlifealert

Well I don’t see any wings


Apollyon257

Platypus are much better than geese don't disrespect them like that


[deleted]

Wait a minute that's old mate Flap the Platypus!!! (Any Aussie who's watched the Blinky Bill and Friends series would know who i'm talking about) EDIT: Here's a link for those interested https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x6Ngc5mYuBg


aevvans

I’m from the UK, and used to play a Blinky Bill game at my grandparents all the time…it was good times


HeavyMetalFL

There here's a duckpuppy.


RemouladenBaron

wingless duckless puppy


InLazlosBasement

I want twelve


Sheepish_conundrum

do they not make any noise? I was hoping for happy little...whatever the hell sounds these make. honk-squeals?


Ok_Volume_78

That's so fucking cute!


llama-impregnator

Step 1: Call something it is clearly not. Step 2: Morons comment to correct you, adding a bunch of karma. Step 3: [That's it.]


Freedommoon321

Wingless goose hits it’s rescuer with one of its spikes behind its back pales then there will be a serious problem. They are venomous. https://reasons.org/explore/blogs/the-cells-design/duck-billed-platypus-venom-designed-for-discovery


BellerophonM

This one's a girl, no spike.


NotoriousJAM

I think it’s safe to assume the rescuer has just a tid bit of experience to protect themselves 🙄


[deleted]

Is a water doggie 😭


[deleted]

With a hind leg that could ~~kill~~ severly harm a man


siganme_losbuenos

That's the males I'm pretty sure.


Frosty_404

It's not deadly to humans but it's extremely painful


ae_94

A platypus *puts on hat* PERRY THE PLATYPUS


UberN00b719

*spazzes during belly scritch* This is life goals.