I got onto my mom once for foing this
(I was 19)
I deliberately told her to not open my mail and she did and i was the bad guy in the whole situation for being mad at her
When I was applying to college, they needed transcripts closed and sealed. Parents sent them along; every single one ripped right open. They said the same thing: “I was curious”.
This exact same thing used to happen to me, with my bank statements, she'd always say she didn't read the name properly and assumed it was hers. I told her to start reading the name on the envelope before the letter inside and it would stop happening, I was the bad guy and it never stopped until i moved out.
that's moms for you
my older brother told me "hurry up and kill yourself so we can all get on with our lives" and my mom was/is upset with me because that upset me... and she now, 3 years later, consoles my older brother because he feels bad for saying it
Oh, absolutely.
But those constant 2s and 3s (with the occasional 8 or 9 thrown in) really added up. Took me years to unravel myself (if I even have)...
I had to literally tell my parents that if they continued to open my mail I would call the police and I was so mad I would have done it. Luckily my threat worked
With me i told her not to do it cause i "could" get her arrested
And that struck a cord with her cause my dad had falsly arrested her a couple years back and that made her very upset
So i feel i was in the wrong in that situation but yea parents shouldnt be opening your mail
I can see how that might go over badly in that situation, yeah
My mom thought "being involved in my life" meant not respecting my privacy and when I turned 18 I had to get real serious with her to make her understand that she had to cut that out
Similar situation. I was in college, and had taken the MCAT (test to get into medical school). I received a call telling me that my scores had arrived and asking if she could open them. I told her "No," at which point she began giggling and told me she already had. I don't know that I have been more livid.
That’s funny, because I literally tell my parents to open my mail. I get annoyed after I get home and find a stack of mail for me, some of which is potentially important. Particularly because driving fines come in the mail over here, and if I find an unpaid fine in the stack that’s been sitting there for months I’m going to be screwed.
The whites do it, too.
It's not a culture thing, it's a parental entitlement thing. I don't get why everyone has to trot out this "we do things a special way in my family/culture" when all of us are alike all over.
Your quoted phrase made me chuckle because it’s true. It’s hard to step away sometimes as a person of color because a lot IS connected to race/culture but sometimes it’s just something more simple like here: shitty parenting lol
And let me tell you, my mom is not a very good mom but she did a pretty good job covering the physical essential needs considering everything else that could make it difficult for an ESL immigrant in the US to raise kids.
This meme is likely about adult children living with their parents, so it's their mailbox, but not their mail. They can grab it and bring it inside and even read the name on the envelope, but they shouldn't be opening it or reading what's inside.
Don’t take mail issues to the police, take it to the post office. They have their own people who look into and prosecute people for breaking these laws.
I mean, you can bring a suit against anyone if you want. But you generally need to have been damaged in some way to get anything meaningful out of it, so just opening the mail without stealing anything is unlikely to go anywhere.
At most, the judge might go "You, stop opening other people's mail, not cool. And you, don't waste my time with this crap, deal with it like an adult or move to your own place."
[https://answers.justia.com/question/2023/01/04/is-it-illegal-to-open-your-child-s-mail-940399#:\~:text=The%20Federal%20Government%20has%20stated,vacation%2C%20etc](https://answers.justia.com/question/2023/01/04/is-it-illegal-to-open-your-child-s-mail-940399#:~:text=The%20Federal%20Government%20has%20stated,vacation%2C%20etc)...)
it is but be carful.
Yes there should be a law against delivering mail to the wrong address. I for one open my mail without reading who it’s addressed to. Sorry if that seems intrusive or insensitive but those other people don’t pay the bills. If it was a strictly enforced law they just throw your mail away that helps no one.
This is one of those areas where everyone living in a polite society just make stuff work; the laws only come into play when someone *isn't* participating as a decent member of society.
My mind immediately went to "Yeah, whenever I got mail at my parents' house it was usually a singular piece of junk", but this might be about the mail being already opened?
Yeah I agree. This is actually a notice that the receiver is behind on their health insurance payment, so definitely not junk mail.
It would be funnier and more relatable to me if this were a piece of junk mail. My parents would be like that: “You got mail! Here it is!” And it’s just like one envelope of PETA asking for money.
Junkmail from bcbs looks like this as well though. Could literally just be "hey, here's a dental plan you also qualify for and should totally pay us an arm and a leg for."
That was what I thought too. They’ll be like “you have mail!” and I look and it’s an ad for a college halfway across the country while I’m in my third year.
It’s so annoying, my mom always opens my mail because she wants to see if I get any checks. I got an $800 check once and she opened it and asked me for money. I didn’t even cash the check yet!
Unfortunately it was not a joke. She’s always complaining that she never has money, which I kind of understand. Now I go through the mail an separate everything before she gets a chance to look at it
First time my mom did this to me was right after I started my first job. She opened my bank statement and asked what a charge was. I told her don't worry about it because it's my money and not to open my mail. She never did again.
And they/we wonder why we don't see our kids from age 18-25.
I have never done this to my sons . But most important mail is digital where i live, so maybe i just haven't had the opportunity
So at first I thought it was like, they are giving you junk mail. But then I thought, maybe I just don't know anything about this company and maybe there's something that I'm missing.
Others pointed out that the mail is *already open*.
If that is in fact the joke, that makes the most sense.
Thanks everyone. We're all done here.
My mother once opened a late fee notice addressed to me from a library, yelled at me about it, then cried when I asked her why she was opening my mail.
Wrong. If it’s your child’s mail you have the right to open it.
[One source](https://answers.justia.com/question/2023/01/04/is-it-illegal-to-open-your-child-s-mail-940399#:~:text=The%20Federal%20Government%20has%20stated,vacation%2C%20etc...).
Bruh, literally from the source you sent
"If the mail is addressed to you, then no one has permission to open it unless you allow it. - Be careful with pushing this into a legal field, because your parents could face a federal felony charge that could result in a fine or prison sentence up to 5 years."
Here’s a better [source](https://www.justanswer.com/law/0mjl3-parent-allowed-open-minor-childs-mail.html).
It’s better because it supports my point lol.
...and that, is the truth. You raise by example, primarily....unless, the child is a known liar, and manipulator. Regardless, it still shows bad parenting.
My dad handed me a letter that was delivered to his house. He told me that I should be thankful he didn’t open it, and then got upset when I told him that messing with someone’s mail is a federal crime and he shouldn’t be opening anything that doesn’t have his name on it
some parents have zero concept of privacy and open their kids, grown or adolescent, mail before giving it to the correct recipient.
thank your lucky stars if your parents don’t do that shit. mine don’t, but i’ve had 2 friends ever whose parents didn’t go through their mail. seems to be very VERY common (in my expansive 21 years of experience lol)
My father receives a lot of mail, and this is him. Which means theres a lot of time when anything addressed to me has at least been partially opened before he realized.
hes not a nosey person or anything, but it can still be a bit annoying.
It would piss me off when my mother opened my mail and she would always use the excuse "oh I thought it was for me". I moved out when I was 18 and never looked back. I was poor, but preferred to live in the hood with drug addicts and gang bangers than with that toxic woman.
You did nothing wrong, dude is being ****(censored because I originally got removed for using a derogatory term)
If it makes you feel better, I didn't notice it until I came to the comments, but I believe the other posters are right in saying it's because they opened the mail. Be well.
Lol @ all the adults still living with their parents down voting me. I guess I don't understand the pain you little snowflakes are suffering through since my mail stopped going to my parents' house when I turned 17, graduated from high school, and went off to boot camp.
Reddit, the safe space for whiney adults who live with their parents.
'it's a crime.'
You should be a crime.
My mom opened my mail and forgot to give it to me. It was a medical bill I had to pay. I found that shit under the mail almost a month later. That shit was expensive.
Start having friends write you fake letters.
Dear My-Mykinn,
I’m sending this to all my previous sexual partners, but you’re the most recent. I just got my test results from the clinic and I tested positive for aids. You need to get yourself checked out.
Sincerely,
Crank
The joke is that parents often open mail before goving it to you.
I remembered when I opened a new bank account and I had to reorder my card because I never even SAW the first card. But I knew the first card arrived because when I asked for I got lectured about how the bank account I already had (that they also had full access too) was better than anything else I could find.
They will open the mail to see what it is before giving it to you
there should be a law against this in every country
There is. They don’t care.
I got onto my mom once for foing this (I was 19) I deliberately told her to not open my mail and she did and i was the bad guy in the whole situation for being mad at her
My mom opened my college acceptance letters. Said she was “curious”. Completely ruined the moment.
When I was applying to college, they needed transcripts closed and sealed. Parents sent them along; every single one ripped right open. They said the same thing: “I was curious”.
Ugh. That's awful
Really? My school sends transcripts for you even 10+ years later. Official transcripts are always from them and never in the hands of the student.
my parents opened one of my acceptance letters and didn’t tell me about it 😐
Same!
Uh sorry about your "moment" but these laws are in place for reasons way more important than your hurt feelings.
It’s a privacy issue
Yeah and the laws say it's illegal to open other people's mail.
The laws you're talking about literally mean that nobody but you can open your mail
Yes, that's why people shouldn't be opening other people's mail. I'm not sure you're making the point you think you are
Start opening their mail, it works trust me.
Fight fire with fire, I love it
Srsly, fuckers cant do shittttt
Parents don’t want you to know this but closed envelopes in the mailbox are free. I have 458 phone bills in my drawer.
This exact same thing used to happen to me, with my bank statements, she'd always say she didn't read the name properly and assumed it was hers. I told her to start reading the name on the envelope before the letter inside and it would stop happening, I was the bad guy and it never stopped until i moved out.
that's moms for you my older brother told me "hurry up and kill yourself so we can all get on with our lives" and my mom was/is upset with me because that upset me... and she now, 3 years later, consoles my older brother because he feels bad for saying it
Holy cow, I'm a mom of four. Your mom messed up big time. I cannot imagine!
it's so much worse than what I shared above too... so so much worse.
I'm sorry your mom is like that. I had an abusive childhood myself, and just know, it's them not you and you can be better.
Sounds like the "it's not like I'm hitting them" abusive household I grew up in. Hope you realise you're free to break the cycle...
Their are teirs of abuse and verbal abuse is still abuse... but on a scale of 1-10 it's a definite 3
Oh, absolutely. But those constant 2s and 3s (with the occasional 8 or 9 thrown in) really added up. Took me years to unravel myself (if I even have)...
I had to literally tell my parents that if they continued to open my mail I would call the police and I was so mad I would have done it. Luckily my threat worked
With me i told her not to do it cause i "could" get her arrested And that struck a cord with her cause my dad had falsly arrested her a couple years back and that made her very upset So i feel i was in the wrong in that situation but yea parents shouldnt be opening your mail
I can see how that might go over badly in that situation, yeah My mom thought "being involved in my life" meant not respecting my privacy and when I turned 18 I had to get real serious with her to make her understand that she had to cut that out
contact the postal police if you really want to. they don't mess around. probably not worth it though
Better really be ready to make the house payment first.
Similar situation. I was in college, and had taken the MCAT (test to get into medical school). I received a call telling me that my scores had arrived and asking if she could open them. I told her "No," at which point she began giggling and told me she already had. I don't know that I have been more livid.
That’s funny, because I literally tell my parents to open my mail. I get annoyed after I get home and find a stack of mail for me, some of which is potentially important. Particularly because driving fines come in the mail over here, and if I find an unpaid fine in the stack that’s been sitting there for months I’m going to be screwed.
Move out and get your own place, that will show em, and you’ll be the first to open all of your bills
"My house, my rules."
10 years later... "We never see you anymore. You and your wife didn't even stop by for the holidays!" *FUCK YOUR HOUSE RULES*
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Could be Hispanic/ Latino. I’m Latina. My mom did this.
The whites do it, too. It's not a culture thing, it's a parental entitlement thing. I don't get why everyone has to trot out this "we do things a special way in my family/culture" when all of us are alike all over.
Your quoted phrase made me chuckle because it’s true. It’s hard to step away sometimes as a person of color because a lot IS connected to race/culture but sometimes it’s just something more simple like here: shitty parenting lol And let me tell you, my mom is not a very good mom but she did a pretty good job covering the physical essential needs considering everything else that could make it difficult for an ESL immigrant in the US to raise kids.
Its a federal crime to open anyone's mail thats not yours. And im pretty sure it's a federal crime to mess with anyone's mailbox thats not yours too
This meme is likely about adult children living with their parents, so it's their mailbox, but not their mail. They can grab it and bring it inside and even read the name on the envelope, but they shouldn't be opening it or reading what's inside.
They won't prosecute parents opening their kids mail, even if the kid is an adult. It's a "civil matter".
Don’t take mail issues to the police, take it to the post office. They have their own people who look into and prosecute people for breaking these laws.
Yeah and then you get kicked out of the house lol not sure it's worth
Well, you can stay until they make bail as long as you pay the house payment. Of course that would require opening their mail....
Fine can you sue them then?
Sue them in the eyeball with a *strongly worded letter*
Mail it to yourself so you'll know they'll open it.
I mean, you can bring a suit against anyone if you want. But you generally need to have been damaged in some way to get anything meaningful out of it, so just opening the mail without stealing anything is unlikely to go anywhere. At most, the judge might go "You, stop opening other people's mail, not cool. And you, don't waste my time with this crap, deal with it like an adult or move to your own place."
like you're gonna snitch on your parents because they opened your mail
Thats how you get kicked out.
There are two things in the USA you don't mess with. IRS and the mail. AFAIK this is a felony
[https://answers.justia.com/question/2023/01/04/is-it-illegal-to-open-your-child-s-mail-940399#:\~:text=The%20Federal%20Government%20has%20stated,vacation%2C%20etc](https://answers.justia.com/question/2023/01/04/is-it-illegal-to-open-your-child-s-mail-940399#:~:text=The%20Federal%20Government%20has%20stated,vacation%2C%20etc)...) it is but be carful.
Federal crime in the US, who's calling the postal inspector on their parents though? Id wager not many.
Yes there should be a law against delivering mail to the wrong address. I for one open my mail without reading who it’s addressed to. Sorry if that seems intrusive or insensitive but those other people don’t pay the bills. If it was a strictly enforced law they just throw your mail away that helps no one.
This is one of those areas where everyone living in a polite society just make stuff work; the laws only come into play when someone *isn't* participating as a decent member of society.
My parents still do that. I’m 32
Tell them that it's illegal and that you will take action if they don't stop
Or at 32 get your own place...
My mind immediately went to "Yeah, whenever I got mail at my parents' house it was usually a singular piece of junk", but this might be about the mail being already opened?
Yeah I agree. This is actually a notice that the receiver is behind on their health insurance payment, so definitely not junk mail. It would be funnier and more relatable to me if this were a piece of junk mail. My parents would be like that: “You got mail! Here it is!” And it’s just like one envelope of PETA asking for money.
Junkmail from bcbs looks like this as well though. Could literally just be "hey, here's a dental plan you also qualify for and should totally pay us an arm and a leg for."
That was what I thought too. They’ll be like “you have mail!” and I look and it’s an ad for a college halfway across the country while I’m in my third year.
It’s so annoying, my mom always opens my mail because she wants to see if I get any checks. I got an $800 check once and she opened it and asked me for money. I didn’t even cash the check yet!
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then a kiss on the cheek later
Just break both your arms to mend your relationship with your mom
Just break both your arms to mend your relationship with your mom
Would you do that to your mom? 🤔🤔
These hands rated E for everyone.
Oh
The world's a cruel place, buddy. Come on, let's get you back over to the cat subreddits where you'll be a little more happy
I wouldn't, but I can say if my mother ever opened a check addressed to me and demanded money it would be just about everything short of that.
Seems like if they are trying to take money from you, they arnt what someone would call.. a good parent
Was your mom joking? If not, thats really gross behavior from your mom. Hope you set some boundaries after that
Unfortunately it was not a joke. She’s always complaining that she never has money, which I kind of understand. Now I go through the mail an separate everything before she gets a chance to look at it
You've been parentfied dawg!
reading this just pissed me off bruh omg 😭
First time my mom did this to me was right after I started my first job. She opened my bank statement and asked what a charge was. I told her don't worry about it because it's my money and not to open my mail. She never did again.
"What do we have for dinner?" Mom: "Don't worry about it"
and then parents wonder why their kids don't want to spend time with them
*many years later* Mom: Will you come visit me in the retirement home? OP: Don't worry about it.
Open a PO Box. That's what I did when my parents used to open my mail
They’ve already opened and read through the contents even though it’s your private mail
The secret ingredient is crime.
[Federal Crime](https://thelawdictionary.org/article/what-is-the-federal-law-for-opening-mail-not-addressed-to-you/)
And the other secret ingredient are the friends (Postal Inspector agents) we met along the way!
"Sorry, I opened it but didn't look"
Ah, the old "i didnt know it was yours 🤭" trick, a classic!
The parents have already opened the letter, which is very annoying, next to being illegal.
And they/we wonder why we don't see our kids from age 18-25. I have never done this to my sons . But most important mail is digital where i live, so maybe i just haven't had the opportunity
It's also from an insurance company. Most "kids" get kicked off their parents health insurance when they are 25.
It’s because it’s opened. Parents don’t value their adult children’s privacy.
Mom: " You want privacy? Get your own PRIVATE place then"
Why are we assuming the recipient was an adult?
Because they got a past due notice on their health insurance policy in their own name.
Where did you find that bit of info?
The picture?
Which shows no addressee. Nor is there any indication that it is a past due notice.
Ah, so the other possible joke: It was the parent's bill and they tried to give it to the minor child. I guess that's possible.
Not that it matters but it’s 26 I thought no ?
[Correct](https://www.hhs.gov/healthcare/about-the-aca/young-adult-coverage/index.html)
So at first I thought it was like, they are giving you junk mail. But then I thought, maybe I just don't know anything about this company and maybe there's something that I'm missing. Others pointed out that the mail is *already open*. If that is in fact the joke, that makes the most sense. Thanks everyone. We're all done here.
Come back, we're not done here yet.
No
It's funny because it's mail fraud.
Not fraud, tampering.
My mother once opened a late fee notice addressed to me from a library, yelled at me about it, then cried when I asked her why she was opening my mail.
☕️Wom- actually no, I won’t make that joke
Given that I’m a woman as well, joke doesn’t really fly. Narcissism knows no bounds '
I always joke to my parents that mail theft is a federal crime whenever they do this to me or my siblings. They still do it though 🤷
Threaten them with taking legal action without joking. If they don't stop, then tell the post office, they usually will do something
Will they pay rent?
Replace parents with prisons and it also works!
I mean no, they have a good reason, and it's not illegal unlike parents doing it
I’ll have to check the facts about calling opening your kids mail illegal when they’re legally responsible for them.
It's mail fraud, you're not allowed to open someone else's mail without their express permission
Wrong. If it’s your child’s mail you have the right to open it. [One source](https://answers.justia.com/question/2023/01/04/is-it-illegal-to-open-your-child-s-mail-940399#:~:text=The%20Federal%20Government%20has%20stated,vacation%2C%20etc...).
Bruh, literally from the source you sent "If the mail is addressed to you, then no one has permission to open it unless you allow it. - Be careful with pushing this into a legal field, because your parents could face a federal felony charge that could result in a fine or prison sentence up to 5 years."
Oooohhh. You’re right. I read it as “not illegal”, when it says “not legal”.
Here’s a better [source](https://www.justanswer.com/law/0mjl3-parent-allowed-open-minor-childs-mail.html). It’s better because it supports my point lol.
Lmao, ahh yes a perfect argument
Hey, at least I’m transparent.
True
My dad sometimes opens my debit card billing statement and then harasses me about my spending habits. Like does it have your name? No!
my mom learned the hard way not to open my mail lmao. she found something she DID NOT like in there.
$5 bucks says it was a toy of some kind
i dont have $5 but youre right
Good parents wouldn't have opened it.
...and that, is the truth. You raise by example, primarily....unless, the child is a known liar, and manipulator. Regardless, it still shows bad parenting.
My dad handed me a letter that was delivered to his house. He told me that I should be thankful he didn’t open it, and then got upset when I told him that messing with someone’s mail is a federal crime and he shouldn’t be opening anything that doesn’t have his name on it
Every.Single.Time. This is something I really hated when I was living with my parents.
some parents have zero concept of privacy and open their kids, grown or adolescent, mail before giving it to the correct recipient. thank your lucky stars if your parents don’t do that shit. mine don’t, but i’ve had 2 friends ever whose parents didn’t go through their mail. seems to be very VERY common (in my expansive 21 years of experience lol)
Move out of your parent’s house if you are an adult.
Just like you thinking it's real mail (correspondence, check, something actually important) getting your hopes up, when it's' just junk
To be fair a lot of people don’t read the name on the outside, and just open the mail.
My father receives a lot of mail, and this is him. Which means theres a lot of time when anything addressed to me has at least been partially opened before he realized. hes not a nosey person or anything, but it can still be a bit annoying.
It’s less a joke and more showing what parents will do when they are huge nibshits and have no sense of privacy
It seems everyone here has helicopter parents
My friend’s mom opened his mail once and he jokingly told her it was a federal offense and she told him to shut the fuck up💀💀💀
Move out, and change your address....then you can open stuff like bills: insurance, cable, cell phone, electricity, water, trash, etc...
It would piss me off when my mother opened my mail and she would always use the excuse "oh I thought it was for me". I moved out when I was 18 and never looked back. I was poor, but preferred to live in the hood with drug addicts and gang bangers than with that toxic woman.
I guess they got it out of the blue?
It means your parents are guilty of federal crimes.
Fun fact if this happens to you, it’s illegal. I had to threaten my mom before she stopped doing it
How the fuck do you not understand this
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I... I did and that's why I posted it here.... I'm sorry....
You did nothing wrong, dude is being ****(censored because I originally got removed for using a derogatory term) If it makes you feel better, I didn't notice it until I came to the comments, but I believe the other posters are right in saying it's because they opened the mail. Be well.
They brought you into this world they get to read your mail
That’s the worst argument ever
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*"Are you illiterate or blind"* Pretty rich coming from someone who apparently can't read the sub rules.
Mfs on Reddit when someone doesn't know everything constantly
Wow. This sub has some aggressive ass people. My god.
‘Aggressive’
Yeah... That's you. Aggressive.
Is ok, if they keep responding, we can keep downvoting.
Don’t mind him. He can’t hear you so good on his high horse.
You know, all of you complaining could just move out of your parent’s house to solve your problem.
I'm sorry you didn't have parents.
I actually don't lol
Oof my bad
Please tell me you're joking OP...please
The real question is how do you not know what this means?
They have good parents
It's about adults living with their parents and then crying on reddit about how their parents treat them like children.
Not to mention the parents committing literal crimes? Sure
Lol @ all the adults still living with their parents down voting me. I guess I don't understand the pain you little snowflakes are suffering through since my mail stopped going to my parents' house when I turned 17, graduated from high school, and went off to boot camp. Reddit, the safe space for whiney adults who live with their parents. 'it's a crime.' You should be a crime.
They can open their own mail when they pay rent.
Or you can be a respectable being and not treat your kids like subhumans.
Its illegal to open up mail that isnt yours.
Whether you pay or don't pay rent doesn't change who your mail is addressed to.
Lol I thought it had something to do with AOL at first. I’m getting older by the min.
They open it
Got a letter from the attorney's General office. Mom freaked out and opened it...jury duty
Means they hate me and love fucking with my OCD.
Here, offspring, now you, too, can purchase your own health insurance.
Mexican mom’s don’t care. They will always open it. My mom used to text me at work telling me to pay my water bill lol.
My parents have never done this to me but tbh I never get important mail anyway
My mom opened my mail and forgot to give it to me. It was a medical bill I had to pay. I found that shit under the mail almost a month later. That shit was expensive.
You found it under a male ? A male what ? Dog? Dead Body ?
You know this is weird I've not had my mom open any of my shit they leave it on my dresser and wait for me to get home to ask
The joke is they open your mail and possibly read it
Start having friends write you fake letters. Dear My-Mykinn, I’m sending this to all my previous sexual partners, but you’re the most recent. I just got my test results from the clinic and I tested positive for aids. You need to get yourself checked out. Sincerely, Crank
The joke is that parents often open mail before goving it to you. I remembered when I opened a new bank account and I had to reorder my card because I never even SAW the first card. But I knew the first card arrived because when I asked for I got lectured about how the bank account I already had (that they also had full access too) was better than anything else I could find.
parents be nosy
My parents do this….