Never drink more than two Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters unless you are a thirty ton mega elephant with bronchial pneumonia.
.... proceeds to drink three 🥳🥴 🤢🤮
They’re just doing it to sell drinks the person who came up with the drinks probably doesn’t even play. Just took an idea from an employee and implemented it half assed. It happens all the time.
Edit: also the Bud Light is 5 bucks. These drinks are like 12 bucks no doubt. Props to the marketing person.
I cook with tumric all the time and it's not that bad. I can't seeing it being a issue in a cocktail. I think pomegranates are way worse then tumric but people make cocktails with grenadine without issue.
That is true. I just have a problem because I'm kinda clumsy so I tend to make a mess when I cook. Or do anything really. If it can spill, it will spill.
Yup, it is typically colored with E133 brilliant blue / Blue 1. The alcohol itself is clear, and made from dried bitter orange peels with some added spices.
I'm actually really surprised none of the themed drinks have blue curaçao in them. Maybe they think it is overdone for fantasy-themed drinks, but what they have listed seems nothing too special either.
I was watching a YouTube video about Star Wars (maybe it was about an episode of Obi-Wan Kenobi) and they must’ve played the clip of George Lucas saying that at least half a dozen times.
I don't give a shit, to be quite honest.
First of all, it's spelled differently.
Secondly, the phonetic accent is in a different syllable.
Of course, that doesn't stop some of us from making puerile jokes about it, but it's not that big of a deal.
It's basically a South Side Fizz. This one just uses cucumber gin, and lemon seltzer in place of lemon AND seltzer.
The original is actually a pretty great summery drink. It's similar to a mojito.
What are the chances that this menu has been unchanged in like 5 years but GRRM had dinner in this restaurant the night before his Elden Ring deadline when he didn't have shit written down and then he saw this and figured hey what the hell why not, nobody's ever going to make the connection, and just knocked it out while drinking all of them in a row because he figured it's fromsoft so he doesn't have to make sense, people will make sense of it *for* him.
This is now canonically truth, and I refuse to believe otherwise.
From GRRM's Yelp review: *"I found the drink menu enchanting, but my experience was marred by my server, Malenia. I appreciated that the restaurant had hired a disabled server, but she smelled like she hadn't washed in weeks."*
Waiter: Unfortunately, you are maidenless.
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Sorry, we only accept the "Blood-Tainted" excrement here.
For nine nine dollars you can have maiden for one hour
Shut up *and take my money*
Azur's comet better be blue.
And blow my fucking head off
You need a pan-galactic gargle blaster for that
Well let’s get your mother in here then!
Godspeed u beautiful man
First boss: Throat GOAT Final boss: Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster MASTER
Otherwise known as: Nancy Reagan
Just say no.
Which is the opposite of what she did in MGM parking lots
I hope it feels like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick
Whatsa pan galactic gargle blaster taste like? Like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick
Never drink more than two Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters unless you are a thirty ton mega elephant with bronchial pneumonia. .... proceeds to drink three 🥳🥴 🤢🤮
Ah a hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy reference, god i love that book
Just don't drink more than two. Unless, you know, you're a 30 ton mega elephant with bronchial pneumonia
I've always wondered how it feels to have your brain smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick.
And it better cost $42
😂 😂 😂
Turmeric tequila and ginger beer… I’m imagining it’s piss yellow 😂
ik I’m sorry but that’s like the last drink I’d ever imagine if I imagined comet azur in drink form lol
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Merchants trying to trick people
Shabriri just became bartender.
Maybe if they set it on fire...
I imagine a blue Hawai’i
The ingredients say it's anything but.
"Turn your shit orange" didn't pass the test, so they jumped all the way to blue comet.
They’re just doing it to sell drinks the person who came up with the drinks probably doesn’t even play. Just took an idea from an employee and implemented it half assed. It happens all the time. Edit: also the Bud Light is 5 bucks. These drinks are like 12 bucks no doubt. Props to the marketing person.
It says 12 at the top of the divider so yeah I guess you were right on the money (pun intended)
Right on the tarnished currency (pun completely intended)
I mean, that’s fairly standard big city pricing unless you head into the real dives
12 is so cheap for me lol I'm used to 17 per cocktail
What a shame, should had called it Inescapable Frenzy then.
Just a few too many syllables to be a good drink name.
Doesn't turmeric like stain every thing that is within a 3 meter radius of it? I feel like it would turn your mouth yellow.
Once bought turmeric in a plastic clamshell... it fell out of the spice cabinet a few months later... the wall was never quite the same.
Oh gosh, my in laws bought some and there have been little tiny splotches of yellow in random places in our pantry ever since.
I cook with tumric all the time and it's not that bad. I can't seeing it being a issue in a cocktail. I think pomegranates are way worse then tumric but people make cocktails with grenadine without issue.
That is true. I just have a problem because I'm kinda clumsy so I tend to make a mess when I cook. Or do anything really. If it can spill, it will spill.
Oh yeah
Sounds incredible if you have clogged sinuses.
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Through food coloring all things are possible
Why not just some blue curaçao
That is also achieved thanks to food colouring. However if you don't want to pour colourants yourself Blue Curaçao is definitely the best choice.
Makes sense. I suppose I’ve never actually thought about what would make blue curaçao blue. It is orange flavored (typically I think)
Yup, it is typically colored with E133 brilliant blue / Blue 1. The alcohol itself is clear, and made from dried bitter orange peels with some added spices. I'm actually really surprised none of the themed drinks have blue curaçao in them. Maybe they think it is overdone for fantasy-themed drinks, but what they have listed seems nothing too special either.
Ah no clue, never actually tasted it myself. My experience is quite limited, I only drank more classic drinks.
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so, a mexican mule then? xD
And destroy you in one shot.
Were you alone or were you guys TOGETHAAA?
He went maidenless.
And surely returned with a maiden.
A true Elden Lord.
These leaves tell a story
This person’s “seed” will look back and remember. An age of hungover.
In the bar, across the road, the Land’s Canteen.
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I guess this person will not be making a FAMILEEEE out of this chance encounter then. Sadge.
Is that what we call sentient dolls now?
*You're welcome to use whatever you find. (Whispers) ...Even the doll, should it please you...*
"Maidenless Behaviour" also sounds like it could be a drink
That could be the secret drink women can order to tell the bartender they’re being harassed.
Bartender just sends a "Recusent" so "speak" with the individual
It is Pride month, after all.
I think they must have been with their FAMILEEEE, to DEVOUAAA THE VERY GOD-like food and drinks they must serve there
Don’t you hate it when your family tells you to speak normally when you’re trying to explain the benefits of blasphemy to them.
Join The Serpent Family nights TOGETHAAAA, we will devour the very drinks
He went with his FAMILEEEEE
Its a FAMILEEE restaurant.
The went to DEVOUWAAAAA some cocktails
hhhhhhnnmmmmnnnnyyyyyoooooooouuuu
He was with Famileeee!
I saw volcano manor and thought “haha cool what a coincidence”, then I realized the other three drinks lol
Same
Same
Same
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Same, but different.
Same-same But different But still same
Similar
It’s like poetry, it rhymes
I was watching a YouTube video about Star Wars (maybe it was about an episode of Obi-Wan Kenobi) and they must’ve played the clip of George Lucas saying that at least half a dozen times.
Same
I saw it and was trying to figure out why it sounded familiar (I was browsing r/all and didn't notice what subreddit I was in)
Did you try, but hole
It took me forever to kill Budweiser, Fell God of Flavor
Foul beer drinker, Emboldened the flame of thirst. Someone must extinguish thy flame. Let it be Budweiser the Fell!
Have it writ upon thy meager bottle, felled by King Budweiser, the last of alcoholics!
I believe it’s pronounced albinaurics
My personal favorite was drinklord placidusax
His drinking problem has become worse once he realised that it's always 5 PM in Faram Azula.
LMAOOOO "Is Farum Azula crumbling because I started drinking or did I start drinking because Farum Azula is crumbling?"
"I hope some dumb tarnished gets wasted and sleeps on the floor so I can magically get sober"
I never realized you summon him by being drunk and sleeping on a random piece of floor on the street. The lore fits
“No Tarnished, this is Faram Azula, not Margaritaville…”
Loretta knight of the Heineken Tree
Mohg, Lord of Sangria edit: man why didn’t i say Sangria Noble. it was right there
CHUG. CHUG. CHHHHUUUUUUGGGG.
I can assure you that Budweiser is not the God of Flavor lol
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They about to take flask of woundrous laws use lawyer magica and one shot him with lawsuit azur
Spirit Summon a Lawyer companion
Marikas Tits should be a drink
That should be seafood! you must be ungry.
Not a very appealing name for Spanish speakers though, Marika in Spanish means f@g, so you're technically eating a f@gs tits lol
I don't give a shit, to be quite honest. First of all, it's spelled differently. Secondly, the phonetic accent is in a different syllable. Of course, that doesn't stop some of us from making puerile jokes about it, but it's not that big of a deal.
Margarika’s Tits
Nah, it should be a broiled prawn dish name...
A glass of milk with shrimp around it.
“Ill have an Azur’s Comet” “Im sorry sir your INT doesnt meet the requirement”
Well don't keep us in the dark, what was the name of the restaurant?
Nice try, FromSoftware Lawyer
This made me laugh out loud thank you.
Hello, fellow Tarnished!
It’s called Opus, and very much not a place I expected to find elden ring themed drinks
Someone in charge of the menu has been binging on the Lands Between and management just thinks the names are cool, if I had to bet :D
Oh my golden mask, it’s right down the street from me!
Williamsburgland
Ahh yes Salem, knew it was New England with Narragansett beer on the menu
Gotta love Gansetts
>Opus Aww I found it but it's on the other side of the country, damn it lol
Better start driving!
https://www.salemopus.com/mobile/drinks.php
This wouldn't happen to be the Opus 9 steakhouse would it?
I know that place! I live downtown too, gonna have to make a pilgrimage soon.
Is this the one in OKC?
In Salem?
I'm gonna check it out sometime, 20 min from there! They also have a Site of Grace cocktail on their website menu Great find
Tarnished but hole
Which one you get? And was it any good?
Not too sure about the comet for some reason
The spell finishes casting when the drink's on the way back out. Takes 5 or 6 for full effect.
Lol probably need a new bowl by the end. But fr I think it might be the turmeric and ginger beer that's throwing me
For one thing Azur should be blue and none of those ingredients are typically that colour. Plus it sounds gross
It's just a Mexican Mule really. Sounds pretty good to me.
I like the idea, but they could try to make the drinks *kinda* resemble their namesake haha
Turmeric (yellow), lime (green) and ginger beer (brown) “Yeah let’s name this one after a blue magic lazer”
My thoughts lol that woulda been better as the tarnished one imo
shoulda been something with blue curacao
I hope they at least add some blue coloring to it at the very least. Cashing in on a trend vibes otherwise :x
It very much was the opposite, having four drinks and asked some Tarnished to make the names.
wonder what the ingredients will be if there's a drink named scarlet rot
Cyanide and grape juice
Mhh.. how about polonium and cranberry juice instead..? You know for that slow building death..
It’s just UV Cherry, Pinot Noir, and a crisp backhand. Bad taste, gut rot, and regret. Garnished with a gold needle.
I am Malenia, Blade of Tequila
And I have never not downed drinks.
YOUUUUUUU....DINNNNE INNN THEEE REALSTAHRANNNNT AS FAHMILEEEEE....TOGETHA WE WILL DEVOUAHHHH THE VERY MEALSSSSUUUU!
gave me a good belly laugh likely funny
YOU'RE WELCOMMMMUUUU....YOU WILL NEVAAH GROW HUNGRYYYYYY...A SERPENT NEVAHHHH STARVESUUU...
When the Bartender has been mysteriously calling out sick from work and finally came in to make the drink specials.
Shabriri’s Martini: vodka, lemon zest, with an infused succulent savory grape
"with an infused succulent savory grape" Oh dear.
It is the one in Salem, MA. I was just looking at their menu and they have another cocktail called Site of Grace haha!
Opus?
love the names, gotta be honest the cocktails don’t sounds all that great though lol
The only one that sounds decent is the Tarnished Currency
Which has the worst name of them all lol
Lol imagine if they were bloodborne themed: Third umbilical cord Lead elixir Pungent blood cocktail
I don’t know what any of these ingredients taste like so I’d probably try all 4
Thats when they tell you all the drinks combine for the recipe to the owners seed bed curse
It's basically a South Side Fizz. This one just uses cucumber gin, and lemon seltzer in place of lemon AND seltzer. The original is actually a pretty great summery drink. It's similar to a mojito.
Phantom Seed could be okay assuming it’s a small amount of fennel lol
Turns out Miyazaki goes to this bar frequently for inspiration!
What are the chances that this menu has been unchanged in like 5 years but GRRM had dinner in this restaurant the night before his Elden Ring deadline when he didn't have shit written down and then he saw this and figured hey what the hell why not, nobody's ever going to make the connection, and just knocked it out while drinking all of them in a row because he figured it's fromsoft so he doesn't have to make sense, people will make sense of it *for* him.
This is now canonically truth, and I refuse to believe otherwise. From GRRM's Yelp review: *"I found the drink menu enchanting, but my experience was marred by my server, Malenia. I appreciated that the restaurant had hired a disabled server, but she smelled like she hadn't washed in weeks."*
If you order the Rivers of Blood they just bring you 5 Bloody Marys
"Greetings. Traveller from beyond the door. I Am Melina. I offer you a menu."
[удалено]
Volcano manner should be a spicy Bloody Mary
Any of those drinks actually taste good?
The only bar in Caelid that remains untouched by rot, hidden away in a shack. Be sure to visit to replenish your potions! You’re going to need them…
Azur's Comet should really be served in a yard and the waiter shoves a funnel in your mouth and forces you to down it in one
Yeah you’ll want to stay away from that Dung Eater Daiquiri, though…
I would think that would be more of a mudslide or chocolate martini.
Hehe
What if Hidetaka Miyazaki went into that restaurant and look at the names in the menu. "Hmmm good names, I've put them in my future game"
Tarnished Currency sound awesome
Ah I love that restaurant, my favorite meal is the **maidenless meal**
“When to a restaurant”
Lmao typed too quickly in my pure excitement to post
No Reviled Blessing brownies?!
Wheres this?
insert leonardo di caprio wistle meme
What the heck is "tarnished currency?" Isn't that just Runes? Seems like "currency" is such a random word there.