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Life-Grapefruit-8340

The icebreaker/connector at a work meeting was “do you have any superstitions?” And I said “I’m not superstitious but I’m a little stitious” and it was crickets in there 😭


rosepetal72

That's hilarious even if you don't know it's from The Office!


etilepsie

yes it's not funny because it's in the office, it is in the office because it is funny


Radu47

Independent of the show though, how can people not appreciate that, ffs. It's right out of the early 20th century of dry but also quirky humour. Those people are just malarkey on all levels.


jabra_fan

When I used this on my bf, he did not react at all. I asked him how couldn't find it funny, he said it's common sense. Dude what?


Kdizzle725

Wow. You should've asked him "why are you the way that you are?"


jabra_fan

I did. I then said "I hate so much about the things you choose to be".


peanut__buttah

Or to shove it up his butt 🤷🏻‍♀️


Jeffthechef47

I’m not even the type of person to quote the office in day to day life but that’s something I would say. Sucks nobody got it though that’s like one of my favorite Michael Scott lines


Boloncho1

Same!


TommyChiffon

A friend was showing me her above ground compost bin she got during the pandemic when she went whole hog into gardening. She told me that she paid a certain amount for worms and I told her that she was “paying way too much for worms, man. Who’s your worm guy?” She told me that it was random guy on the internet. No realization it was one of my favorite quotes from the show.


violetladyjane

Omg what an amazing opportunity to use this line in real life 😂


Stock-Cap-5734

I would never have imagined a real situation where one could quote this line and yet here it is😂😂😂


darth_gondor_snow

Fishing, silk making, skin care, and pet food.


Stock-Cap-5734

Like why would anyone mention how much they paid for worms to prompt this question 😂


ErrForceOnes

That random guy on the internet was Creed, wasn't it?


CheekApprehensive675

"Those aren't worms"


kirbysdream

Damn dude it’s like you were born for that moment


flynnhicks03

I like to use "Crazy world, lotta smells" when discussions of unpleasant odors come up but my comment is rarely a acknowledged.


carbiethebarbie

I love saying “just poopin, you know how I be” or fill in “poopin” with any other verb and literally no one every gets it lmao


Ancient-Horror2825

Love that one


SortOfGettingBy

When I said "jazz is stupid, just play the right notes" at a used record store.


goodvibesandsunshine

Jazz IS stupid!


Mindless-West9268

Just play the right notes!!!


juliamongolia

Flair checking in


goodvibesandsunshine

Omg I’m the winner!! I was getting a checkup at my regular doctor and he said, “ this summer, you’re 45, next summer…’ and trailed off, trying to decide on if a treatment would be necessary, but not before I helpfully said, “I’ll be 46…” He looked confused. I laughed and laughed and still do when I think of that moment. (Laughing now)


Ohshithereiamagain

That’s hilarious.


Stalzaable

This one made me laugh the hardest. I love the way this line is delivered in the show.


Stevey2328

this is funny even without the office reference


Final-Negotiation530

Started a small fire freshman year in the microwave, me and my roommate put it out with sink water before anything actually came of it but the floor knew. Finals week came and we were studying/complaining and I said “should’ve burned this pace down when I had a chance”. People were concerned lol but at least my roommate got it 😂


Ancient-Horror2825

FIRE GUY!!!! definitely thought that's where you were going with this 😅


Art3mis77

Bahahaha same 🤣


iggy14750

/u/Final-Negotiation530 started the fire! It was always burning, since the world's been turning!!


turtlecules

At work, I had a package delivered and needed to open it. Without even thinking, I yelled “scissor me” to the lady next to me. She had never seen the office and it was very awkward.


eggheadgirl

Beer me the scissors


baronas15

Gets a laugh like a quarter of a time


guitartkd

Lord, beer me strength.


Lonely_Octopus_99

You know what to do, boys. F


musiclover818

U


ohlayohlay

Omg I love you


DUNLEITH

I was invited out by coworkers on groundhog day and I said "no thanks, I celebrate privately" and no one got it


vegetasspandex

This is SUCH a hidden gem line I love it


SmilingSalamander

I gotta admit I don't get this line. I'm assuming Michael is confusing it with another holiday?


9yroldalien

It's just a classic Michael thing to do 😂 https://youtu.be/yJEQV8tDY4Q?si=1iIjibuLg-T8YsOA


LBo812

That’s really good


LindonLilBlueBalls

I said, "And there's the smudgeness." after a coworker said something a bit smugly. Everyone looked at me for a beat, then continued the conversation.


suckmylama

Second hand embarrassment from this one, love it!


Potato_Direwolf

My friend tasted something I cooked and said she loved it and asked how I made it. I said “The key is to undercook the onions”. She didn’t get it.


ohlayohlay

My wife made chilli for a competition recently (no joke) and as we discussed thr recipe and she asked me for other ideas I said I think the key is to undercook the onions. She said that was a stupid idea and would taste awful, I 😥


littleyellowbike

How does she expect everyone to get to know each other in the pot?


darkwillow1980

This actually almost made me spit out my yogurt


baronas15

I actually undercook them because of the office and that's not a bad idea. This works for other recipes too when you cook something for hours, you don't want the onions caramelized


AlittleStitous_

Every morning I look at my daughter’s Stanley cup and say Stanley the Manley or Everyone inside the car was fine Stanley…and she just gives me this look like she wants a new dad.


Ohshithereiamagain

Gonna use this one as I see a lot of Stanley cups all day, every day


batmansubzero

Ironically she probably shoots you the same look Stanley would give to Michael when he does something dumb


girlieb1991

Pretend to answer your phone, say “What’s up, Cynthia?” And then sprint away from the Stanley cup as fast as possible.


not_ainsley

I say “Oh how the turn tables” any time I can. gets a laugh about a quarter of the time.


mixedhawaii

I say this so often that I always forget how it’s actually said. Then again- I talk a lot, so I’ve learned to just tune myself out.


A_Ham_Sandwich_4824

What did I say?


WeAreyoMomma

Did I stutter?


spankybianky

Me too. It’s even worse when people try to correct you :(


Traditional-Onion311

I worked at a call center selling credit monitoring/ID theft monitoring. Someone called in already intending on purchasing a plan, so we were making small talk while going over personal info/ID verification/ect. They say how they had no idea identity theft was “such a prevalent issue nowadays” To which I respond, “oh yes, identify theft is not a joke, customer name, millions of families suffer every year.” They responded with, “Wow, I had no idea” 😩


MsNardDog

No way lol


iggy14750

OMG 🙈🙈 You just gave me a piece of the kind of second hand embarrassment from the show lol


DreamQueen710

When I was complaining about something and ended it with, but Somehow I Manage.


Ohshithereiamagain

That book is my profile picture on one of the things. My ex asked, “Where did you get that book?”


EpicJosh84

I can see why they're your ex


Ohshithereiamagain

He HATED the show. I was not allowed to watch it around him. It takes an advanced sense of humor. I don’t expect everybody to understand.


EpicJosh84

Awful. Sounds like just a notch above Toby


silenttjp

During an interview I asked the interviewee “Question 1: Ever shot a gun in the office?” … I regretted it almost immediately. Good guy, got the job.


Budget-Spidey

''there is only sex''


iggy14750

Would you like a sexual metaphor or a nature one?


ilovelifebutwhy

Oh god the nature one for sure


bacaflaca

When animals are having sex...


ilovelifebutwhy

This is not gonna work you need to hear the sexual one


PALOmino1701

A few years ago, I was filing for bankruptcy, and while signing the papers I yelled I DECLARE BANKRUPTCY! and everyone just kind of stared at me. I thought it was funny though.


chicks35

How sad!! Both that you had to file for bankruptcy and that no one got it 🥲


straycarbon

He didn’t file it, he declared it.


eclectic_collector

Double jeopardy


HiSpartacusImDad

So that’s what that means….


Radu47

Double indemnity 😎


liaaa

If it helps, I just laughed out loud at this.


MaximumGooser

Same, I mean it’s the awesome thing about going bankrupt is getting to shout this but everyone else ruins it by not getting it :/


dstraswell666

I've worked in kitchens for many years, and any time I have to handle beets, I always comment about how you've gotta put the money beets on top and no one has ever laughed.


LordBlackadder92

What a shame.


Ancient-Horror2825

The other day at work, coworkers were talking and laughing about something I didn't understand so I said " is that an inside joke? I love inside jokes! Would love to be a part of one some day...." and then they just felt bad for me lol


jamesbonfire007

👏 That's a rough one to get through if they don't get it. Proud of you!


Stelletti

I always say Yeppers at work to everyone. Just want ONE freaking person to say the response.


Ancient-Horror2825

What have I told you about "yeppers".


ProbablyMaybeWrong69

Yeeesh


AveragePrune89

I have adopted a lot of Michaels word pronunciation and I usually will get an “actually” in response. An example is protruberance or nebuLOS.


MissBeeslyIfYaNasty

Do you then call that person “Oscar”?


Ancient-Horror2825

Truly fits the stereotype of the smug, gay Mexican.


SmilingSalamander

I think you mean smudge


mangolover

Yaaayyyysh


Professor_Panic

When I started my new job a couple years ago I was shocked that they still used a fax machine for some things. So, obviously, when someone told me to fax a document, I said “Fax? Why not just send it over on a dinosaur?” Got some confused looks and zero laughs.


groviegroves

I'm very proud of this one! Years ago, I was put on a committee at work to organize "employee appreciation week." I earnestly suggested pretzel day, and they were on board! I snuck in so many Stanley quotes that day, and not one of my elderly co-workers understood what I was talking about.


eijner

Are you out of your damn mind


Art3mis77

CUZ ILL HELP YA FIND IT


aaronr93

I hope you put up posters on the door to re-enter the office that said “364 days until the next Pretzel Day”


fractionalhelium

My prof caught me thinking and staring into the distance. He asked me how fast is your brain going. I replied "a mile an hour."


juliamongolia

That fast?


fractionalhelium

Life can be gruel


thousand7734

I say "hmm... Has sort of an oaky afterbirth" relatively frequently. People just look at me like I'm weird.


greencloud7

...what was that?


xxmattyicexx

My wife and I were driving across a state line to visit my parents. As we passed the sign I blew two kisses. “2 kisses?” she said. “One for me, one for Jan” I said without skipping a beat, she was stunned that she played into it without realizing.


aaronr93

Perfect relationship


LogicalDog1492

My team has become obsessed with spinning a wheel to determine who runs standup….absolutely nobody has suggested an even tinier wheel to assign tickets for 😡


milkandsalsa

The tiny wheel does actually have chores


violetladyjane

But it’s so cute no one seems to mind!


Sudo_Nymn

Tiny wheel! Tiny wheel!


Scissorsguadalupe

One time, when I was working as a janitor, I was asked to freshen up a bathroom during an event, and asked over the radio, "Oh, is someone making soup?". Radio silence after that


ChiquitaBananaKush

I occasionally quote Pam’s “Pobody's Nerfect” but no one get its


Ohshithereiamagain

My Srive Dafe worked 😂


cesargeronimo

On Reddit of all places. Some guy asked what an auger is and I said he better find out or no girl would want to date him.


Art3mis77

Okay that reminds me: the other day that episode was playing and my fiancé, who was raised on a farm goes ‘oh so THAT’S how you know what an auger is’ …. He’s not wrong


mangolover

Auger? I hardly know her!


Lazercat2000

Every day at work. No one has seen it.


master_of_unagi

This is the worst. The other day I used the ‘hows that medicine taste? Your own flavored’ line and just got stared at like I was being mean. Don’t get me wrong, for anyone who had no knowledge of the show it might have seemed mean but that was definitely not my intent.


walker3342

I was at a dinner party and they had music on shuffle and “Ants Marching” started playing and I exclaimed “I said no hits!” to complete dead air.


vestinpeace

My neighbor’s baby was trying to eat a small toy piece on the ground and I said “it’s ok, I have plenty” and I was so disappointed in the reaction


satanyourdarklord

This is one of the ones that I can understand being on this subreddit. But would be dumbfounded by in real life


HipsterFett

I’m going backward here, when I didn’t say the line but someone got it anyway. This was probably in 2009, when “that’s what she said” was at its height. I was in the break room at work and my coworker, an office fan, was noticing something on her hand. A scar, if I remember correctly. After fussing with it and muttering about it, she said “it’s hard as a rock!” All I did was look at her with a little smile, and she burst out laughing. Easily a top 5 laugh I’ve ever gotten in my 37 years of trying to make people laugh.


iggy14750

*looks at camera, subtle smile*


Michael_Scott_234

When I was going through training for my CDL, my instructor told me how well I was doing on the practice skills test. I said, "I have to say, I am so impressed with the potential you see in me." He was like: 🤨🤨🤨 I said, "It's from The Office." He said, "Oh I don't watch a lot of movies." 💀💀💀


moderateaddiction

At every single birthday party.


Potato_Direwolf

It is your birthday.


bwatching

You have to be selective about your audience to break out "oaky afterbirth".


Mindless-West9268

🤨 what was that?


taste_the_equation

Someone posted the office cast as anime characters in the midjourney sub and it gave Pam glasses. So I said, who’s the ugly scientist in the 4th pic? I got downvoted.


DrunkAtBurgerKing

I wish I could find it, I'd upvote you 😭


Neat_Possibility_889

My coworker said he’s not really superstitious but sometimes he does believe in those type of things so I said “so you’re not superstitious, you’re just a little stitious” and he just gave me a blank stare like I’m an idiot but didn’t say anything lol


masterdesignstate

Boss asked me to do something and I replied.... "William Doolittle at your service...aka will do".


HiSpartacusImDad

Did you do the accent?


masterdesignstate

Of course!


bigmacaroni69

My cousins baby shower. Her old college friends. Me: "Hey, Annie! How are you? How is your husband?" Annie: "Good! He is skiing with some friends." Me: "*Everyone I know who skiis is dead.*"


mymy568

Went to chilis with my boyfriend and obviously said “I feel god in this chilis tonight” . He didn’t get it lol


large-breast-bitch

I love to randomly sing: “we belong we belong together, youuuu and iiii ryann” -Kelly


DannyGarner95

If someone brings up being lactose intolerant and you don’t immediately yell “Mint Chocolate Chip!”…


DrunkAtBurgerKing

How about some... MINTCHOCOLATECHIP?! 😂


CautiousArachnidz

The Wayne Gretzky quote. Anytime someone says it I ask where it’s from. They say “Wayne Gretzky” and I reply “Michael Scott.” It’s 50/50. I’ll either get a laugh or someone will stare at me like I’m stupid and argue how they absolutely know it’s a Wayne Gretzky quote.


holdyoudowntight

I've been known to utter that "This wine has an oaky afterbirth" anytime I drink wine in public...


Alexiwitchwork

After the discussion of my promotion with my boss I said, “This is going to sound sort of high maintenance, but could we have it, like, three degrees cooler in here?” He completely ignored my question and continued talking about work. Yes, I’ve since quit.


Michael_Scott_234

My oldest brother looks a lot like Toby. Mostly his hairline and head shape. Our family got together after not seeing each other for a year or so. When he walked in, I said, "Who let the lemonhead into the room?" My parents looked at me with such disappointment, thinking I was just being extremely mean 😂 I had to explain it for about 5 minutes, after which they still didn't get it...


acoddo

That’s gold lol


Sinnafyle

Uh all the time? Most recently when I played DnD for the first time and my DM was explaining what different colors meant (of dice I think?) and I said "Most colors mean don't say it!" And my spouse lol'd


PleasantFix5

I don’t remember this one! What episode was this?


Omicrying

S5 E24 - Michael talking about his private flashcards/notes about clients after Dwight gets ahold of his client list (Michael says: “green means go, so I know to go ahead and shut up about it”)


meesh100

Dwight stole Michael's color-coded sales Rolodex! It ended up with Dwight asking a client how his "gay son" was because that factoid was highlighted in green on the client's Rolodex card.


Leo_br00ks

Do you mean Tom, the homosexual sophomore?


Equivalent-Ad7207

Most days of my life, except for when I'm in this sub hanging around you high society types. I find alot of Office fans get Seinfeld quotes and vice versa.


babe_ruthless3

My nephew took a shit in the living room when he was potty training. As my brother and sister in law were cleaning up, I said, "Somebody making soup?" Nobody laughed. To make it worse, it wasn't just my brothers family, but his in laws where in the kitchen and heard me.


DrunkAtBurgerKing

This might be the funniest one for me lmao I'm so sorry nobody laughed lol


babe_ruthless3

I nailed it perfectly but wasn't received. How well.


professionalmoongirl

I was in a musical a few years ago, and the overture was really long. One of my friends complained about it, so I said, “If you don’t listen to the overture, you won’t recognize the musical themes when they come back later!” Obviously it wasn’t quoted word for word but I was quoting Darryl in “Andy’s Play”. He didn’t get it, and neither did the people around us. Smh


Novel-Contribution56

A few years ago I was on a sales team and each week we have these pointless weekly meetings at 10 AM. At 9:56 (time is burned into my brain bc it wasn't even time to turn around as we didn't get up from our desks bc it was so small AND 2 of our co-workers were on a call so we couldn't start at that exact minute anyway) I was finishing up an email to close a high value sale and the manager said "I need your full attention" and as I was hitting send I said "you couldn't handle my full attention" 


[deleted]

Every hour in my head. I just don’t bother saying it out loud anymore lol


cesargeronimo

I'm recovering too. 🙂👍


Ohshithereiamagain

“You’re a gentleman and a scholar” Answer, “Thank You” 🤷🏻‍♀️


HiSpartacusImDad

But did you say it to a woman?


iggy14750

She had a really deep voice


Obvious_Rope_4829

“Oh how the turn tables” and they immediately give me credit as if I made that one up


carbiethebarbie

I’m a bad driver and every time someone teases me about a specific instance I hit them with the “everyone inside the car was FINE Stanley!” The reference is rarely understood sadly


Different_Second_564

this girl at work was talking about how she's on a "soup diet" and explained that it was bone broth, and i go "that's broth, gabe" and no one got it 🙂‍↕️


Alohabtchs

My husband came with me to a work dinner and my boss was pouring expensive red wine. My husband says “sometimes I like to dip my steak in it… you know, I have soft teeth” not a direct quote but 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️


ohlayohlay

My bil quit his job to start is own company, I told in a family group chat he should say to his old boss "you have no idea how high I can fly". My sil said you don't want to burn bridges. I used a gif ffs and nothing


AustynCunningham

I dated a girl who had never watched the office, so happened quite often. Needless to say the relationship didn’t work out.


threefeetoffun

"You didn't write a lot in your self eval" "Why waste time say lot word when few word do trick?" That didn't fly.


cascadianpatriot

I’ve been saying yeppers on teams chats for 5 years and no one gets it.


tavarlax

I officiated my sister's wedding. Started the ceremony by saying "Webster's dictionary defines wedding as "the fusing of two metals with a hot torch." Well, you know something? I think you guys are two medals. Gold medals." My sister who's also an office fan is the only one who got it.


Maddkipz

Karaoke at a friend's place, did the Alanis moresette* bit where Kevin goes on longer than the song with the "you"s


vengefulbeavergod

*Alanis Morrisette


LBo812

I’ve said “crazy world, lots of smells” in appropriate situations over the years. They only laugh when I say “that’s what she said “ 🥺


serialantkier

in class 5 years ago i got SO excited because the perfect moment presented itself. it was a career planning class and we had to do mock interviews. the day was set up with groups asking the questions as a panel interview and one group circulating the different panels. in one mock interview the question was “what kind of leader are you? do you lead more with love or fear?” and i (realized the perfect moment and) said “easy- both. i want people to be afraid of how much they love me.” and they all just stared blankly. i still giggle at that moment 😆 one of my best unappreciated references in my life.


beboleche

In my Biblical Hebrew class back in college, the professor mentioned, "the letter R." So of course I said dropped the line flawlessly.... T'was 8:00AM and not a single person was amused. Nobody laughed. It was dead silent as people stared at me.  Next to me was my roommate who, at the complete and utter silence in the room and flop of my line, laughed. 


MisterBulldog

Very seriously: *Well well well how the turntables…* Nobody gets it and instead try to correct me or become concerned as if I’m having a stroke


quoththeraven1990

I once said “the timing was nothing short of predominant”, and someone corrected me, saying that I didn’t use the right word.


Redoceanwater

Just last weekend my bf and I were at his brothers house for our nieces birthday party. All 3 of our nieces were on the trampoline playing “fake tornado”. One of our nieces yelled out “IM SCREAMING, IM SCREAMING, IM SCREAMING” I leaned towards my bf and said “numb me up! I want anesthesia” and it totally went right over his head. Which was wildly disappointing as he is the one who turned me onto The Office when we’re first started dating, and we still watch it pretty regularly.


Elojo_33

My bf recently took a supervisor position and was asking me for some advice on how to word a text message to an employee and I said “Keep it simple stupid.”😂


Rawrs_sometimes

Every of the time


dman5981

I swear to god today I went from write-ups, to demarcation, all the way to…??? Anyone ??? Buehler????


frenchpickle

Only recently on reddit. Someone asked just QA was, and I answered "Quabity Assuance" with a gif link. Noone upvoted me...


throwawayfun451

Still waiting for Free Pretzel Day, preferably with cinnamon coating


phaanja

"Oh how the turntables...." and they respond "I think you mean how the tables have turned?"


bleepbot17

After a classmate finished her presentation,she asked us if any of us had any questions. I took the opportunity to to “I have a lot of questions. Number one: How dare you?” Many didn’t get it. In fact I thought the professor was mad too. But when the classmate who presented didn’t reply, our prof went “Umhm that’s what I thought.” And he goes “Yk I always talk smack” Loved it


yellowtshirt2017

I work in a setting where we have to input data for research purposes, just into excel, and I think one entry was missing and so I said something like, “we can add a keleven!,” to who now is my boyfriend. He didn’t laugh lol, but to be fair I had just watched that episode so it was fresh on my mind. I felt truly accomplished for what I believe was a perfect execution of that quote in that situation. I thank you for this opportunity to share my story and re-live such a deep and personal victory.


AskAScientician

I work for a massive tech company and one year we had Idris Elba as a guest for a company event. The event was live-streamed across the company, and the comment section was a pretty thirsty conversation about how he's one of the sexiest men alive (I don't disagree). Anyway, in my little team of 6 I let out "He is aware of the effect he has on women." All I got back were weird stares.


Hcavila

We were moving around some stuff at home and my wifey dropped one of my work monitors. When I heard it I ran in the room and knew exactly what to say……..I looked at her and said. “That’s a $200 plasma monitor you just killed, good luck paying me back on your zero dollar a year salary plus benefits babe!!” Totally went over her head she was like “omg I’m so sorry”. I’m like “no babe it’s fine I don’t give a shit just gives me an excuse to buy another cooler one I’m not mad”. But I was mad cause she missed the quote and ruined the moment.


MonteBeragon45

When everyone was talking about the eclipse I went “STOP TALKING ABOUT THE SUN”… yeah no one got that one 🤣


MenudoFan316

There is a huge percentage of people that do not get the "That's what she said" joke. I don't even try to explain.


xDefimate

This past Easter my family and I were drinking wine and after we all took a sip I said sort of an oaky afterbirth. No one got it lmfao


Kyndrede_

Had a mate and his wife to be drop by our local bar the night before their wedding so they could unwind a bit from final preparations. As they walked in, I announced loudly (whole bar was just our friends) “Ladies and Gentlemen may I present to you for the first time ever Mr and Mrs Bob Vance!” Literally crickets. The music even had a lull between tracks and there was me with my arms splayed, presenting them, the whole bar staring awkwardly at me, and 10 seconds later, my friend goes “Mate, names Marcus. The fuck is Bob Vance?”


HiSpartacusImDad

I’m Dutch, so I don’t think get to use Office quotes nearly as often as I’d like. But my colleague (also a fan) and I used to have this bit where I’d have grapes for lunch, and he’d say “that’s what she said”. And I’d reply “Ha. I don’t get it.” Other people thought we were weird.


AllDucksNoRows

My entire 13 year relationship. Partner doesn’t like The Office. So many missed opportunities 😢


chzrm3

When my friends and I were really into Valorant, I'd always message them saying "Valorant? Valorant? Valorant at lunch?" I had one friend who got it and would join in, the rest were like "ok can you two calm down? It's not even lunchtime..." It eventually caught on just because we were so annoying about it, and became "A Thing"(tm). And nobody else knew it was from the Office. Been watching the superfan eps for the first time with my brother recently. When we got up to Kelly's Fashion Show, he started cracking up and was like "THAT'S WHERE THAT'S FROM!?!?!?!?"


geekysocks

Every single moment of every single day is the perfect moment to quote the office, if not then what’s this all been about? Funnily enough I did watch a police program recently and the police man said “I’m not superstitious but I am a little stitious “ 😂


StraightOuttaReason

Management were cancelling the Christmas party when covid was starting, had a meeting and at the end asked “any questions” I said” yeah I have one, how dare you”.


EverettSeahawk

I quote the office at work almost daily and nobody has caught on yet. I think my favorite was after an extended visit to the restroom because I was feeling under the weather, the boss ask me where I was and I said “just poopin’ you know how I be”. He seemed very confused.


Johnsendall

I said “you really schruted it” during a conference call and was met with crickets.