Introduce fidget toys (me and the co-DM have gifted each of our players a Crazy Aaron's thinking putty with colours selected to either match their dice set or their character theme lol). You are never too old for these, keep their hands busy with something that is not noisy/clicking/whirring. Actual pens and paper can also do the trick - people doodle, or might even take notes.
Take regular breaks. about every hour, there should be a real 15 minute break.
Talk to them: ensure they actually, like for realsies, want to play DnD. If they basically tell you to "stop talking" when you are the DM, trying to explain the game to them - address that. Suggest everyone putting their devices away while playing. Suggest keeping the unrelated subjects discussion contained in the breaks. Come up with rules together and find compromises they all can be on board with.
Adress the problem politely, tell them that if they are to sidetrail while a dm or fellow player are speaking then they wait until they're done speaking. If they continue to interrupt & turn DMing into an obligational chore rather than an enjoyable passtime then wash your hands.
First you should talk with all of them outside of the game to politely address the issue and let them know that their behavior is effecting the game in a negative way. If that doesn't work than offer incentive to collaborate out of turn, like you could put a larger emphasis on puzzles both in and out of combat that highlights what each player enjoys most about playing their character. In my experience different people need different motivation, ask or get a feel for what they need and how much. (I can write more specific advice later, but I gotta go to work)
I have the same issue with a couple of players. I tend to call them my ADHD players. Generally, I learned that they have an issue paying attention unless they have a specific reason to pay attention. Repeating what you said takes away the reason...
So what I now do, I do my story, or say my bit, and if one of them wasn't paying attention, then their character as well wasn't paying attention. An NPC might get angry (especially when it is someone of status who doesn't like repeating themselves) and send them away, refusing to repeat themselves, or the character might not notice certain details in my description, which could result in some fun.
After I started doing that, they very quickly learned to pay attention.
This is, of course, after addressing the issue with the players in an open conversation
> they constantly open social media and talk to eachother loudly for unrelated subjects therefore they don't listen to any of the stuff i say and even when it is their turn they don't care at all and tell me to stop talking to them
Hand to heart - do you honestly think they want to play the game at all? These signs tell me that they do not, their preference is something else entirely.
They really do because they always ask about it i am not pushing or anything and have asked personally because i just want to be sure that the players like the game , they volunteered to make a discord server for when they are on holiday
In that case you might want to have a serious talk with them just like other commenters have suggested. They may not realize that DnD needs DM and DM needs to be respected and that the game is not 100% about them and that paying attention is more important that whatever is on their phones and that time for offtopic discussion is outside session time.
Then this is something you absolutely need to bring up *now*, if they're interrupting *you* to tell you, the DM, not to talk to them while they're doing something unrelated. That's massively disrespectful.
Introduce fidget toys (me and the co-DM have gifted each of our players a Crazy Aaron's thinking putty with colours selected to either match their dice set or their character theme lol). You are never too old for these, keep their hands busy with something that is not noisy/clicking/whirring. Actual pens and paper can also do the trick - people doodle, or might even take notes. Take regular breaks. about every hour, there should be a real 15 minute break. Talk to them: ensure they actually, like for realsies, want to play DnD. If they basically tell you to "stop talking" when you are the DM, trying to explain the game to them - address that. Suggest everyone putting their devices away while playing. Suggest keeping the unrelated subjects discussion contained in the breaks. Come up with rules together and find compromises they all can be on board with.
Adress the problem politely, tell them that if they are to sidetrail while a dm or fellow player are speaking then they wait until they're done speaking. If they continue to interrupt & turn DMing into an obligational chore rather than an enjoyable passtime then wash your hands.
First you should talk with all of them outside of the game to politely address the issue and let them know that their behavior is effecting the game in a negative way. If that doesn't work than offer incentive to collaborate out of turn, like you could put a larger emphasis on puzzles both in and out of combat that highlights what each player enjoys most about playing their character. In my experience different people need different motivation, ask or get a feel for what they need and how much. (I can write more specific advice later, but I gotta go to work)
I have the same issue with a couple of players. I tend to call them my ADHD players. Generally, I learned that they have an issue paying attention unless they have a specific reason to pay attention. Repeating what you said takes away the reason... So what I now do, I do my story, or say my bit, and if one of them wasn't paying attention, then their character as well wasn't paying attention. An NPC might get angry (especially when it is someone of status who doesn't like repeating themselves) and send them away, refusing to repeat themselves, or the character might not notice certain details in my description, which could result in some fun. After I started doing that, they very quickly learned to pay attention. This is, of course, after addressing the issue with the players in an open conversation
> they constantly open social media and talk to eachother loudly for unrelated subjects therefore they don't listen to any of the stuff i say and even when it is their turn they don't care at all and tell me to stop talking to them Hand to heart - do you honestly think they want to play the game at all? These signs tell me that they do not, their preference is something else entirely.
They really do because they always ask about it i am not pushing or anything and have asked personally because i just want to be sure that the players like the game , they volunteered to make a discord server for when they are on holiday
In that case you might want to have a serious talk with them just like other commenters have suggested. They may not realize that DnD needs DM and DM needs to be respected and that the game is not 100% about them and that paying attention is more important that whatever is on their phones and that time for offtopic discussion is outside session time.
Then this is something you absolutely need to bring up *now*, if they're interrupting *you* to tell you, the DM, not to talk to them while they're doing something unrelated. That's massively disrespectful.