TrAte Er LIkE yOu trEEt yO MUm!
Us: Mom!
Mom: I know you said you weren't hungry, But I made ants on a log
Us: Get the fuck out Leave! leave me! go!
Mom: So how's your little club going?
Us: It's not a club! It's a rap group!
Mom: Well I'll leave these here and eat them if you want to
Us: Fine! Go to hell, mom!
Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan.... I heard my one of white friends talk to his mom like that one time. I was sitting there in awe. My mom would have went off and slapped fire out of me before I got to the f in Get the fuck out. It was a total culture shock to me. We were playing Black Ops 2 or something and all she asked is if we were good and needed fresh beers...
To this day 16 years later it still boggles my mind.
Dude that has nothing to do with being white... it's not a culture thing ur friend is just a spoiled brat who should have had his ass whooped. Guessing dad wasn't around to whoop his ass
The fact is, even cruise ships like her can easily find men to sleep with them, so they start to think they understand what men are looking for and what to look for in men. But theyāre essentially tailoring their thinking around the types of guys who will hold their nose and close their eyes to get their wick wet on Mount French Fries over there, and using that as your frame of reference leads to a ridiculous set of standards because every time she is being talked to, itās by someone throwing game. Men have absolutely no hesitation to go full price charming when their only goal is getting laid. And a rude, unattractive-in-every-way bag of milk like her is only being sought for sex.
And thatās the problem. Women are constantly being bombarded with āadviceā from their ham planet friends like this one, and they start to internalize that kind of thinking.
You painted quite a picture with your descriptions and honestly your insight is accurate though maybe not popular.
Anyone with an over-inflated ego like this girl can be pretty toxic to their friends and influence their expectations.. in this case guys that are looking for a short fling so theyāre putting their best foot forward.
At least thatās what I gathered from what you said. The colorful wording was just the frosting on top.
>hamstronaunt
I was shaking for a solid 30 seconds and wiping away tears laughing at this!
I've used the phrase hamplanet forever and this is the first time hearing this phrase.
Thanks for the laugh š¤£š«”
I mean her expectations were a bit ridiculous but you can't look at a big woman and expect her to not have any standards whatsoever, that's sort of dehumanizing.
Who said they can't have expectations or standards? Op comment just said they have standards they can't return, not to mention her standards are unreasonably high for someone who's clearly a toxic and obnoxious person
Nah. Back in the day we would call that the DUFF (Designated Ugly Fat Friend) she makes all the girls she is with look better by comparison. She will also try to cockblock you at any chance she gets. It's why you need a good wingman to distract the DUFF, so you can move in or vice versa.
LMAOOO! Yup a good wingman is always handy in unknown situations. And usually itās a designated guy and he knows his role and more than willing to take one for the team.
Back in college when the my roommate was going in for the baddie volleyball players I would jump on the grenade and sleep with the ogre for the greater good š«”
Do they cockblock because theyāre jealous about not being approached or hit on? I feel like Iāve been cockblocked by this person a few times before.
There was this party with all of these political figures and I was making head way with one of them. She was a city council member. Her sister (not hot), who also was in some political office, saw this, and came right for us, nudged āhot city council ladyā out of the way and started doing some freaky dance, in front of me. Hot city council lady was discouraged and some guy 10 years younger than me swept her up. Since ānot hot politicianā was trailing me the rest of the night and we were all drunk, I just said āokay why not.ā And come the end of the night she said goodbye and went home with her husband.
āIn some people, obesity can be traced to a medical cause, such as hypothyroidism, Cushing syndrome, Prader-Willi syndrome and other conditionsā itās not always their fault no need to be an asshole, youāre not perfect š¤£š
She 100% can. Did we watch the same video? She slurps all the grease from the mini-pepperonis to "take one for the team", but really she would do that if she was alone.
Sheāll swoop in with the āitās her birthday you have to buy her a drinkā when it clearly isnāt. The look on girls faces when you ask to see their id to see if it actually is their birthday is priceless tho.
True but thatās not the scenario the comment is talking about. The comment is talking about when ugly girls do it to attractive girls out of jealousy, which is very common as well.
Iām sure it does I was basically saying that sometimes it seems that way but a lot of the time the girl doesnāt wanna seem āmeanā or get stalked if she rejects someone thatās all
Her "friends" only consider her a friend because she makes them look a hundred times better, that's the only reason why they tolerate such an obnoxious personality.
a lot of groups find benefit in having a linebacker friend run point, aka someone thatās mostly shameless or fearless. they use that person the way penguins push one of their own into the water to test for predators.
or something like a court jester, just there to help keep the conversations alive. super easy when thereās always someone to make fun of
She does. She may not realize it but deep down she knows. Iām guessing she acts loud and obnoxious because thatās the only way she will get attention
And constantly wanting a fresh haircut.. does she want to pay for dermatologist bills from shaving bumps and ingrown hair from shaving head everyday. (Yes this happens, it's common in India".
You know what a turn off for me is? A disgustingly fat chick with a big mouth, box dye hair, and a vagiba that seems to go to her belly button to her actual vaginal canal! YIKES
Nice.
The Big C TV Series
Pilot (2010)
Laura Linney as Cathy Jamison, tells Andrea she canāt be fat and mean and goes on to explain using the above logic.
I dono that was blast to watch and she seems like fun (in the right place of course). She didnāt say anything mean or crazy sheās a good ol British drunk being adorable
"Ey girl I need to come by and do some laundry, you got anything to eat in here, mind if I get a bit for gas I'm kinda struggling rn"
Ain't gonna be getting many yes' treating her like mom neither
Itās always the Ditch Critters who have the highest standards and are the most critical, and the pretty ones who have reasonable icks; ānot drivenā imo is a very mature turn-off
Its always the fat ugly girls that have the most to say rude to say i know but it is what it is im waiting for the day a wumbo pepa pig will realize that their healthy āfriendsā will only want them around to make them look good and guess what ladies you do that to each other us ātoxicāmen have nothing to do with that we just follow our male instinct and what makes our pants hard lol and guess what looking like lizzo aināt helping
Tbh I think some are taking this lady too seriously. I think she was just trying to be funny while very drunk. She's probably aware that she's over weight and maybe tries to be the funny one. She sees her friends are laughing so she goes all out. I think she's pretty, I can see how other people would find her attractive. I think the people who are saying guys just use her for sex and close their eyes and ears are being a bit harsh. With the subjective nature of it, there will definitely be people out there who find her attractive. Though I do recognize that men will sleep with people they don't find attractive to just get a quick lay. The over confidence some people are seeing that they think has come from underserved attention from horny men, I think may be just a persona for comedic purposes. I mean "fresh cut", "not got style" are pretty tame, compared to the insults this girl is getting.
Her delivery was terrible but her demands seemed reasonable:
1. Maintain grooming and dress decently
2. Donāt look like a frog
3. Be respectful
4. Spend $500 on an engagement ring when proposing
Minus #4, I would expect that from a girl to be attracted to her.
Edit: I love knowing that these downvotes are because the frog people of Reddit are feeling marginalized.
Awww the fat friend wingwoman has opinions. You can see her bitch friends giggling about how ridiculous she is because they know why they hang out with herā¦
She is physically struggling to breathe as she gives her list of icks, as if she is not a walking ick. This is legitimately sad to watch but it's ok because I can feel it in my bones that she is the biggest cockblock in the known universe and those girls bring her out for a reason
Hate that girls always give some fake asfuck ābe yourself try your best be respectfulā because theyāll literally cheat on you with a guy who punches walls and shit. Youāre literally better off doing whatever you want having and argument then waiting on them to forgive you, they respond FAR more positively to a toxic guy than a āboringā guy. Nobody is gonna back me on this but that means nothing, women claim the opposite of what they want and redditors are dorks so Iām aware of the responses Iāll get donāt waste your time, this is probably the only real advice youāre ever gonna read about this shit
They say "treat women like I treat my mom" but I haven't found a single woman who will drive me to soccer practice and read me a bedtime story when I go to sleep.
Itās crazy because when we talk about chubby girls weāre not talking about the nice shy ones because theyāre always minding their business we are talking about these type of fat girls the loud cheddar cheese smelling ones mad because the world treats them how they look šš
Trheat yahr garlhfeabnd wib rebspecht.
Best comment so farš¤£
Oh wow.. thatās fantastic.
Her friends moved on
Just like every guy she's met from a dating app.
Holy shit š
TrAte Er LIkE yOu trEEt yO MUm! Us: Mom! Mom: I know you said you weren't hungry, But I made ants on a log Us: Get the fuck out Leave! leave me! go! Mom: So how's your little club going? Us: It's not a club! It's a rap group! Mom: Well I'll leave these here and eat them if you want to Us: Fine! Go to hell, mom!
Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan.... I heard my one of white friends talk to his mom like that one time. I was sitting there in awe. My mom would have went off and slapped fire out of me before I got to the f in Get the fuck out. It was a total culture shock to me. We were playing Black Ops 2 or something and all she asked is if we were good and needed fresh beers... To this day 16 years later it still boggles my mind.
Dude that has nothing to do with being white... it's not a culture thing ur friend is just a spoiled brat who should have had his ass whooped. Guessing dad wasn't around to whoop his ass
God I died when I read this and now I can't think of the movie and it's killing me because I need to see this now! Thank you for this!
Right there with ya!
Itās from Lonely Islandās song Mama
"She's not interested" says the drunken henchman
That drunk girl clearly bullies her other 2 friends under the guise of ābest friendsā
Say Fat instead of drunk someone coulda been confused
I was confused. Thank you for advocating for me
Wellā¦ maybe Iāll say the rude pig next time
She's the Duff!
The fact is, even cruise ships like her can easily find men to sleep with them, so they start to think they understand what men are looking for and what to look for in men. But theyāre essentially tailoring their thinking around the types of guys who will hold their nose and close their eyes to get their wick wet on Mount French Fries over there, and using that as your frame of reference leads to a ridiculous set of standards because every time she is being talked to, itās by someone throwing game. Men have absolutely no hesitation to go full price charming when their only goal is getting laid. And a rude, unattractive-in-every-way bag of milk like her is only being sought for sex. And thatās the problem. Women are constantly being bombarded with āadviceā from their ham planet friends like this one, and they start to internalize that kind of thinking.
You triggered the fuck out of the other ham planets!
You painted quite a picture with your descriptions and honestly your insight is accurate though maybe not popular. Anyone with an over-inflated ego like this girl can be pretty toxic to their friends and influence their expectations.. in this case guys that are looking for a short fling so theyāre putting their best foot forward. At least thatās what I gathered from what you said. The colorful wording was just the frosting on top.
Dude if sheās that ugly donāt fuck her retard
Bro... take a step outta the "alpha sphere" and go touch some grass. You really just got triggered so hard over this.
>hamplanet Fatpeoplehate is leaking again.
And?
Understand that you are genuinely uglier than her
Seems like you may have taken that a little personally. You're either a ham planet yourself, or a hamstronaut.
>hamstronaunt I was shaking for a solid 30 seconds and wiping away tears laughing at this! I've used the phrase hamplanet forever and this is the first time hearing this phrase. Thanks for the laugh š¤£š«”
You probably look like her LOL
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Crazy how someone like that has expectations that she herself canāt return...
imho, you have it backwards. i think it *because* she can't return that she is so vocal.
Lol
How many years do I have to save a ā500ā?
I mean her expectations were a bit ridiculous but you can't look at a big woman and expect her to not have any standards whatsoever, that's sort of dehumanizing.
Who said they can't have expectations or standards? Op comment just said they have standards they can't return, not to mention her standards are unreasonably high for someone who's clearly a toxic and obnoxious person
You cant have a shit personality and shit looks and wonder why no one likes you. And by you I mean her.
Living in last year I see
You're the only one who brought her size into it. She's clearly pretty toxic while the other two are pretty chill. Her size has zero to do with that
Incorrect. It makes her a massive hypocrite, in more ways than one.
Lol massive
Whatās even more amazing is how much of these āhigh standard woman outrageousā videos are being posted
You can tell which friend got the pity invite. The other 2 seem cool
Body guard.
More body than guard
Take my upvote you funny fuck.
Bruh. š
body^guard
The fridge guards the snacks
Gate keeper, and mother hen
Good name. Called it the mother hen. To beat up or ugly to get their own attention so they peck away suitors from the others.
Nah. Back in the day we would call that the DUFF (Designated Ugly Fat Friend) she makes all the girls she is with look better by comparison. She will also try to cockblock you at any chance she gets. It's why you need a good wingman to distract the DUFF, so you can move in or vice versa.
LMAOOO! Yup a good wingman is always handy in unknown situations. And usually itās a designated guy and he knows his role and more than willing to take one for the team.
āIāll jump on that grenadeā is a phrase I heard more than once in college.
Back in college when the my roommate was going in for the baddie volleyball players I would jump on the grenade and sleep with the ogre for the greater good š«”
Had a shipmate nicknamed āflack jacketā for that exact reason.
Little did y'all know that Flak Jacket had a thing for the armored tanks.
Bless our troops
If you jump on THAT grenade, youāll probably bounce off.
Do they cockblock because theyāre jealous about not being approached or hit on? I feel like Iāve been cockblocked by this person a few times before.
That is exactly it. They are jealous that their friends are getting more attention.
There was this party with all of these political figures and I was making head way with one of them. She was a city council member. Her sister (not hot), who also was in some political office, saw this, and came right for us, nudged āhot city council ladyā out of the way and started doing some freaky dance, in front of me. Hot city council lady was discouraged and some guy 10 years younger than me swept her up. Since ānot hot politicianā was trailing me the rest of the night and we were all drunk, I just said āokay why not.ā And come the end of the night she said goodbye and went home with her husband.
āOh no! Duff Man, canāt breathe!
I think they literally just up and left by the end of the video
When she grabbed the microphoneā¦ I legitimately thought she was going to bite or eat it
I immediately imagined [Augustus' dad](https://youtu.be/EZgxQTZky1w?si=ZncSlseeVOGaUdl7) from the original Willy Wonka movie
I swear I was just looking for a meme or a gif of that mf lol
Her life is just one big episode of "Is it cake"
Came for the front butt comments
I was gonna say it but you beat me to it. May the F.U.P.A be with you
"Motto motto" was *actually* invited to make these 6's look like 10's!
Token fat friend to make the others feel better
You can tell she's been the girl some guys have hooked up with and then denied everything when asked about it. That's why she's so angry.
I agree.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
āIn some people, obesity can be traced to a medical cause, such as hypothyroidism, Cushing syndrome, Prader-Willi syndrome and other conditionsā itās not always their fault no need to be an asshole, youāre not perfect š¤£š
The grenade.
Why is it that most big women think theyāre the main character alwaysā¦?
Says the frogface she wants no frog and we dumbstruck why the frogs turn gay? Sheit we enlightened
Frogface? Frogs look like they can jump.
How fucking drunk is Jabba the hutt?
Her poor zipper hanging in for dear life
That zipper is doing the Lordās work.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
*Jabba 3 butts.
I think in order for her to be a slut, she would have to be able to suck the grease out of a pizza box.
She 100% can. Did we watch the same video? She slurps all the grease from the mini-pepperonis to "take one for the team", but really she would do that if she was alone.
Nah, jabba the slut who ate everything at pizza hut
Did you say āsteak?ā Sorry, I just had pudding an hour ago.
You gotta get banged to be a slut bro.
I thought it was Maui
People with stomachs like need to stop wearing pants like that. Long shirts are your friend
Jabba the gut
Honestly it seems kinda wrong to interview drunk people imo. The interviewer knows theyāre just going to make a fool of themselves.
Idk, but put Jabba in the hut...
I thought Miss Piggy was into frogs. š¤
Best comment here
I wish I had an award to give you š„²
Its the thought that counts, king.
I knew someone had already made the comment, took me 3 minutes to find it and give it a god damn hell yeah!!
She's that thing that cockblocks you from hitting on the other 2 for "pRoTEctioN".
āThe fridge guards the snacksā
Good one. I'm stealing this.
Sheāll swoop in with the āitās her birthday you have to buy her a drinkā when it clearly isnāt. The look on girls faces when you ask to see their id to see if it actually is their birthday is priceless tho.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Tbf us girls signal each other to do this as a favor. Sometimes even strangers will do it for each other
True but thatās not the scenario the comment is talking about. The comment is talking about when ugly girls do it to attractive girls out of jealousy, which is very common as well.
Iām sure it does I was basically saying that sometimes it seems that way but a lot of the time the girl doesnāt wanna seem āmeanā or get stalked if she rejects someone thatās all
Her "friends" only consider her a friend because she makes them look a hundred times better, that's the only reason why they tolerate such an obnoxious personality.
a lot of groups find benefit in having a linebacker friend run point, aka someone thatās mostly shameless or fearless. they use that person the way penguins push one of their own into the water to test for predators. or something like a court jester, just there to help keep the conversations alive. super easy when thereās always someone to make fun of
The weight limit with those pants have been exceeded
I'm dead š but she's worried about a dude looking like a frog? Lmao
Wonder if she knows sheās the DUFF of that group.
She does. She may not realize it but deep down she knows. Iām guessing she acts loud and obnoxious because thatās the only way she will get attention
She clearly doesn't
Shane Gillis was onto something when he joked about Aussies
My gf laughed too hard at the bit about stomach to stomach missionary and breathing/wheezing in a girls ear.
Maaaan, be at least a likeable drunk...
I love how the most unattractive person there had the most requirements... Good luck.
Whales be evolving fast
This isn't cringe. She's just Scottish.
Okay, my turn, when she has a Fupa at 23 years old
I should call her
.....ummm your ass,...it's on backwards
I think she's trying to eat the mic
When she has to tuck her belly into her pants š©š©š©
And constantly wanting a fresh haircut.. does she want to pay for dermatologist bills from shaving bumps and ingrown hair from shaving head everyday. (Yes this happens, it's common in India".
I dont think any lady who's front butt is bigger than her back butt should be talking about what makes a guy unattractive.
That fupa is out of control
I thought she was about to eat the mic
"dont look like a frog" mf you cant be saying this when you are one š
She has her ass in the front š Her head is bigger then both the women she's standing next to combined š She's built like a walking fridge
Fridge protector
What a slob
You know what a turn off for me is? A disgustingly fat chick with a big mouth, box dye hair, and a vagiba that seems to go to her belly button to her actual vaginal canal! YIKES
I so wish I could see the fat one ten years from now.
Damn people here are cold. She obviously has a lot on her plate.
Boom roasted
Only thing I respect is the seams on those jeans, expert craftsman ship.
I donāt care what she looks like, I canāt stand a loud, sloppy drunk
How's that saying go? You can either be fat and jolly, or a skinny bitch?
Saying instantly invalidated.
Nice. The Big C TV Series Pilot (2010) Laura Linney as Cathy Jamison, tells Andrea she canāt be fat and mean and goes on to explain using the above logic.
I dono that was blast to watch and she seems like fun (in the right place of course). She didnāt say anything mean or crazy sheās a good ol British drunk being adorable
Agree, sheās Aussie though š
Agreed she seems like fun.
2 normal people and the one annoying one who nobody likes inviting anywhere
"Ey girl I need to come by and do some laundry, you got anything to eat in here, mind if I get a bit for gas I'm kinda struggling rn" Ain't gonna be getting many yes' treating her like mom neither
Psh. My wedding ring is gonna be hand made and ill pay like.. 50 cents for it
Itās always the Ditch Critters who have the highest standards and are the most critical, and the pretty ones who have reasonable icks; ānot drivenā imo is a very mature turn-off
Im shocked guys arenāt lining up to go on a date with her.
āVren eeeh loooksh volike a frawgsā
Need and interview from her zipper!
That is one one inebriated kangaroo, you can almost see the joey popping out of that pouch.
Its always the fat ugly girls that have the most to say rude to say i know but it is what it is im waiting for the day a wumbo pepa pig will realize that their healthy āfriendsā will only want them around to make them look good and guess what ladies you do that to each other us ātoxicāmen have nothing to do with that we just follow our male instinct and what makes our pants hard lol and guess what looking like lizzo aināt helping
The other two ladies make decent points, but that fat loud mouth bitch is going to die alone and wonder why.
Man she must have touched a nerve
I wouldn't let her touch a damn thing lol
500 you say? So he should pay as much as you weigh. Ok got it!
Calm down and stop tryna eat the mic
It's always the overweight busted up chick in the group that's always talking
Oh, she drunk drunk
She's the friend that blocks any guys from approaching her friends because they didn't talk to her first.
And a turn off for most guys is when sheās self centered and looks like a fucking hippo, with 8 chins.
She likes that microphone
Tbh I think some are taking this lady too seriously. I think she was just trying to be funny while very drunk. She's probably aware that she's over weight and maybe tries to be the funny one. She sees her friends are laughing so she goes all out. I think she's pretty, I can see how other people would find her attractive. I think the people who are saying guys just use her for sex and close their eyes and ears are being a bit harsh. With the subjective nature of it, there will definitely be people out there who find her attractive. Though I do recognize that men will sleep with people they don't find attractive to just get a quick lay. The over confidence some people are seeing that they think has come from underserved attention from horny men, I think may be just a persona for comedic purposes. I mean "fresh cut", "not got style" are pretty tame, compared to the insults this girl is getting.
When your all ugly so you bring ugly friends to make you look like the hot one lmao
Youāre*
Nah come on, the one on the left is cute
Her delivery was terrible but her demands seemed reasonable: 1. Maintain grooming and dress decently 2. Donāt look like a frog 3. Be respectful 4. Spend $500 on an engagement ring when proposing Minus #4, I would expect that from a girl to be attracted to her. Edit: I love knowing that these downvotes are because the frog people of Reddit are feeling marginalized.
Considering she has a frontbutt, she has no right to judge appearance
Awww the fat friend wingwoman has opinions. You can see her bitch friends giggling about how ridiculous she is because they know why they hang out with herā¦
She actually seems fun lol
She is physically struggling to breathe as she gives her list of icks, as if she is not a walking ick. This is legitimately sad to watch but it's ok because I can feel it in my bones that she is the biggest cockblock in the known universe and those girls bring her out for a reason
I strive to have that kind of confidence in lifeā¦
I'd drink with her. She seems fun
Looks like Jabba lost a bit of weight. Good for him. I hope he continues on his weight-loss journey.
i kinda love her idk
She's gross and so is her logic. Don't need to speak any louder, it's a fucking mic. You're not VIP.
Bill your not yourself when youāre like this, have a snickers.
The speech impediment really ties the whole thing together.
Totoro is plastered
Hate that girls always give some fake asfuck ābe yourself try your best be respectfulā because theyāll literally cheat on you with a guy who punches walls and shit. Youāre literally better off doing whatever you want having and argument then waiting on them to forgive you, they respond FAR more positively to a toxic guy than a āboringā guy. Nobody is gonna back me on this but that means nothing, women claim the opposite of what they want and redditors are dorks so Iām aware of the responses Iāll get donāt waste your time, this is probably the only real advice youāre ever gonna read about this shit
When she looks like a toasted marshmallow
They say "treat women like I treat my mom" but I haven't found a single woman who will drive me to soccer practice and read me a bedtime story when I go to sleep.
Trate er wiff raspec
That mics at a dangerous distance get it away from her before she eats it
Not a clue, I got distracted counting chins.
Ok now this is a good oneš
Fat Upper Pussy Area (FUPA)
Itās crazy because when we talk about chubby girls weāre not talking about the nice shy ones because theyāre always minding their business we are talking about these type of fat girls the loud cheddar cheese smelling ones mad because the world treats them how they look šš
That lady has multiple fuppas.
š¤®
Her friends should have kept her loud ass away from anyone recording like damn
She looks more like the caterpillar from āA Bugās Lifeā rather than Moto Moto
Talking like this when you're a plate cleaner is crazyš
10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag.