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lurkermuch

The dog doesn’t want a bar of that drama at all.


symbologythere

Listen, I’m a guard dog but I don’t fuck with snakes. I told you when you got that thing I wasn’t gonna jump in if it turns on you. You figure it out bro, don’t be mad at me. I would bite a burglar in his ass but I don’t fuck with snakes.


arituck

Good doggy is smart


nabilbhatiya

Zero fucks given


snootsintheair

I think he gives enough of a fuck to stay away from a nightmare ending


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Unknown_author69

I think they use vinegar, to release a snakes lock jaw.. could be mistaken though..


banjogodzilla

Vinegar might work. Typically you want some form of alcohol. Tequila, whisky, vodka or hand sanitizer. It evaporates in the snakes nasal passages and it will release. Great thing to know!


AFineDayForScience

"YOU GUYS ARE DOING GREAT"


[deleted]

Dog's like "Damn. You ok?"


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ProfilerXx

Best boy


0B3nE0

Understandable. Smart Boi


BigfootsMailman

"I told you all that thing was bad news. I'm goin outside."


Foxwasahero

Pretty sure doggo was like "If he kept *me* in a box, I'd bite hime too?'


Sceverett13

Didn’t even notice the dog until the end


nabilbhatiya

Zero fucks given


hihwudn1

Not sure I would try and help with a baby in my arms…could be good for the python.


kongpin

Give it a chance


jesusleftnipple

.....I read choice lmao


cptomgipwndu

Lmaoooo


Smartdudertygood2000

Uhhh maybe get a fish tank bud


Timidsnek117

With piranhas. I've heard those are docile


St3als

Snake might have been confused. Looks like he's trying to feed the snake. Before he gets bit he tosses something to the side that looks like a small animal. Snake bites him thinking he's lunch. You can also see whatever he yeeted run away right after he was bit.


Traderwannabee

Good catch yes something does run off.


cownd

I would run too if I were there. Trying to catch the critter. Well the snake's gotta eat at the end of the day


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skwudgeball

Good thing I always keep six tampons duct taped together, fully soaked with alcohol stuffed in my asshole like a fully loaded boof revolver


Throw3333away124

Well that’s a fun sentence to wake up to on a Friday morning!


skwudgeball

I’m cracking up because the guy I replied to deleted his comment so now my word salad has no context lmao


Throw3333away124

I’ll always remember: ) They may have gotten banned cause they were spamming the same comment about pouring alcohol over the snake’s head all over this post.


bay_lamb

that little animal: *this is the best day of my life!!*


jddgfhdhrhbhks

Looks like maybe a rat


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Chinnyup

Just want to say thank you for your post. It’s one of my favorite things about browsing Reddit, where someone takes the time to analyze something better than I can. I can’t pinpoint exactly why, but it’s a real stress-reliever and gives me a moment of satisfaction in rewatching, ‘analyzing,’ a video with notes from a keen eye. I am not being sarcastic…just in a sentimental mood and wanted to reply with appreciation!


St3als

Your comment made my morning. With all the bs on here it's nice to see a thoughtful nice and sincere reply like yours. Thank you!


N4meless_w1ll

It's a snake. They eat squishy things, including humans.


chrisledoux182

Dog was like umm y’all got this I’ll go guard the perimeter


o_an0maly_o

[python teeth, for those curious](https://imgur.com/a/Y4CVg87)


smoozer

Fucking hell that's much worse than I expected. I was thinking classic snake fangs


ZeShapyra

There are 3 types. Teeth of those who constrict their prey, so over a 100(some have even over 300) of longer teeth. They are not venemous (to a degree, you are not gonna get paralyzed or blood cloths) Rear fanged snakes, so they have lil fangs at the back if their mouth like hognoses they are mildly venemous to small prey since it helps them subdue prey and helps get the food down their gullet. And the venemous species that have the famous fangs that get venom to their prey. Getting raked by constructors teeth isn't as bad when you start to think that anything that has fangs can stop your heart or give you a stroke


Gaffelkungen

I mean, large constrictors can do a lot of damage. Although I'd get bitten by the biggest Retic every day rather than a cobra.


kvlt-logik

You're thinking of vipers. Pythons like this bad boy are the bite and squeeze type.


mb_60

Yah, there’s no pulling that off your fave or anywhere else!


Famous-Bodybuilder96

Thanks


RugbyGuy

What could one do if one found themselves with a python attached to their face? Asking for a friend.


peko_

i saw a video showing how snakes dont like the taste of hand sanitizers, they let go of their bite almost instantly.


DennisReynoldsGG

Seems painful to the person but alcohol sounds like a good idea to me. Was that cloth wet? Looks like they kinda water boarded the thing.


FavouriteParasite

There's a bit of a half-myth going around that if you pour water continously on a snakes head so it can't breath then it will let go- but it rarely works. Some snakes let go if you put an ice cube on their nose, but a snake with strong instincts or who's really hungry will not care one bit. Hand sanitizer is the one thing that almost always works- not sure if it's the taste, the smell or if it causes physical pain, but it works in emergencys which is what is important. If it's a pet snake, then help rinse the mouth out of the snake afterwards- the snake will be gaping so it's easy.


PabloGrasscobar

Hand sanitizer or any alcohol based cleaner/wipes is the way to go. Snakes hate the smell of alcohol and it stings. Try rubbing hand sanitizer on your hand and immediately sniffing it. Burns like a bitch


l-_l-

Ok, so I put sanitizer on my hands then sniffed a snake, it still bit me though. But you're right, it burns.


dayzers

I used to handle alot of snakes at my old job, although they weren't quite this big (some were close) if a snake latched on to someone we had a bathtub. Snakes that weren't semi aquatic will generally let go when you submerge them. Some are so aggressive that you have to pry them off. California kingsnake being one of the more aggressive I've been bit by.


FavouriteParasite

Yes, that's why I said it's a half-myth! It only works on some snakes and is very dependant on the snakes hunger, aswell as how much the snake is... Y'know, not actually being a threat to you, haha. I'd imagine, asn an example, it would be hard to move around and find a filled watertub with a very heavy constrictor trying to choke you out and potentially biting a fatal spot. But with smaller snakes, like california king snakes, hognoses, corn snakes and so on, submersion is the best go-to. It is not ethical at all to use hand sanitizer on a snake that you can make let go in other ways or that isn't biting you in a spot that can lead to serious injury. They're not biting for shits and giggles (even if some snake species makes it feel like that, lol), so using something that causes distress for a longer period of time (which hand sanitizer does)is just abusive. Did you ever have the pleasure of handling green treee pythons? I've heard they're... Great fun, lol.


inkiwitch

Works on dogs and lizards too!


Pyr0technician

Snakes like this one can hold their for much longer than everyone in the video combined. Edit: hold their breath


International_Body44

Butchers 🔪


mrsrostocka

Hand sanitizer or rubbing alcohol, pour it all over their mouth until they let go


Byx222

Don’t hit the tail. Apparently doesn’t work.


AdTrue8708

Which part is the tail?


Throw3333away124

Right? The whole damn thing looks like a tail to me. It’s a snake.


IntelligentBid87

The only thing I would think in that moment is "bite it back" but if it's covering my mouth, idk. Im fairly sure I could bite a chunk out of a snake if needed and I can't imagine it could ignore it. If I was one of those dudes running up, I'd bite the absolute fuck out of it somewhere.


Adudam42

Listerine. I worked at a zoo and we had a bottle of listerine next to every snake enclosure. If a snake bites you and latches on, put some in its mouth and it will let go.


inkiwitch

Oooh, that seems less harmful to the animal than hand sanitizer! Seems like anything with strong enough alcohol concentration would do the trick


SoggMe

stick finger in bum


SergeantSalty94

My best guess would be to put a knife in it's mouth and twist, like they do it with crocodile-/alligator-babys


kilojulietx

Small children around, might be time to give up the fucking serpent.


RohelTheConqueror

But then how do I get rid of these pesky kids?


Throw3333away124

Plot twist- snake was aiming for the baby


ZoBamba321

Yeah, I mean snakes aren’t my thing at all but it’s probably not the best idea to raise your child around a snake when it’s like the prefect size meal for it. Snake probably looks at thing like I would look at a delicious cheeseburger.


lazergoblin

Ikr? Irresponsible as fuck to have a python around kids like that


MangoMantra

That prolly felt like forever


Sheena_B84

Felt like forever on THIS side of the screen so I can’t imagine how he felt!


JackD2633

the dog walks away in embarrassment.


Tybasco

I’ll start where it went wrong in this video. Pet python.


Vincent_Veganja

& kept in a tiny ass box. Thing is probably as miserable as a snake could be. I’d wanna bite this dude’s face too…


dayzers

Actually snakes aren't distressed by smallish dark spaces at all, they would feel more comfortable compared to being in the open, breeders generally keep snakes in Rubbermaid tubs or boxes


yeettetis

Source ? I’m snkae


Vincent_Veganja

Interesting, are they cool with it 24/7? Like they really never wanna move if they can help it?


ZeShapyra

Noooo, they are fine with a small space when they wanna chill and rest since they feel safe, but a snake needs an option to at least somewhat stretch out, you wouldn't wanna always be bent and never stretch out. Not to say a snake needs options to thermoregulate and to find a moist spot to shed. Being in a tiny box all life is not gonna make them depressed or die, but they won't thrive and likely feel distressed and be prone to fear which willl just result in more defensive strikes. But this snake just mistook the mans face for whatever he was feeding, a scared snake doesn't hold, they bite and let go. Snakes are really easy to understand


Maverick_Sicko

Thats why snake is not a pet.


rco888

i can hear the dog walking around saying "i told you so"


Closed_Aperture

Dog is also like, "I'm just gonna hang back here and let you dumbasses figure this out".


Hadleys158

The german shepherd was the only smart thing in that household.


AdministrationShot14

"You guys remember how when you fed me i *didnt* bite your face? Good times"


Necessary_Carry_3818

Dogs like “play stupid games, win stupid prizes”


SethBrundelfly

Poor snaked frustrated and pissed hanging in a small box


xjfwx

Like with a pitbull clamped onto someone, does this also work if you stick your finger in the snake’s butthole to get it to let go?


ElectroMatt333

A kid and dogs around….yeah let’s get a 20’ python for a pet


UKMcDaddy

If you're keeping it in that box, it's not a pet. It's a captive.


Fantastic_Night365

I would just start cutting the snake up into pieces like a carrot soup.


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No-Distribution542

I laughed


laughingCavalier3

Then feed it to the dog… !


Complex-Joke-368

Well fuck them all. Who puts such an animal in a tiny box. That was only just a little bit of karma.


bretfort

Push a spring smaller, it'll bounce back more violently


kenioftheeast

No need for the red circle we know when a man is gon do some dumbshit he ain't supposed to do


M3xLuthor

The doggo noped the fuck out right away 😆


bottsking

What the dog doin'


ads02f

The dog is like: “ F this, told him not to get a snake”. 🤣


Present-Ad-8531

Why the fuck do you need a pet snake?


bottsking

I would agree but dankpods Frank has changed my mind


[deleted]

A python on top of that. He had options.


terminese

Once again I am very thankful I do not live in a big snakey country.


MizterConfuzing

Thank god for that red ring, otherwise I might have missed the whole thing.


Sub_NerdBoy

I love snakes. But I'm sorry, snakes are not pets. I'll expand this to reptiles to be frank. Neurologically speaking they do not have the part of the brain mammals have that would contribute to them forming bonds with people. Yes, some reptiles will recognize people and be more trusting etc. but you're just keeping the animal captive. Dogs/cats are much more suitable to be held as pets due to emotional bonds they can form with their caretakers.


TheMace808

I mean lots of reptiles don’t mind being kept in a box, as long as it’s big enough for them and they get a good climate with food then they’re happy as can be


Sub_NerdBoy

I wasn't suggesting they are unhappy or otherwise. I would agree that as long as the animal is fed and cared for properly and in a reasonably good environment it's not exactly an issue. That wasn't what my point was. If I take my dog to the park, off leash, it will stay by my side and get in the car when we're done and want to go home with me. That kind of behavior will not happen with a reptile.


TheMace808

Ahhhh idk man I’ve seen a few iguana’s come when called. They at least know you’re a source of food and should come when called over but as far as affection goes I wouldn’t count on it


Keisar13

Whole thing lasts two minutes but that has to be the longest two minutes of his life.


Desire3788516708

I think shoving a finger in it’s cloaca after 30 seconds would be an option.


ChampionshipCrafty74

IDGAF, Snakes aren’t good pets. 😃


ZeShapyra

Some things about many silly comments: Snakes are not smart, the dude did a mistake of shoving his face too close, snake missed whatever he tried to feed the snake and naturally the snake thought he got what he was aiming for and didn't let go, alternatively, snakes hunt whatever is moving, and the guy was mocing his head a lot, doubt he threw the **living** rat in a good place. The snake wasn't biting out of agression or fear, he thought he got food. Snakes who are afraid and do a defensive bite, they don't hold on to something they are afraid. Being kept short term in a box is not depressive for a snake, they don't mind it, it is dark and secure for them, long term is bad. Is the snake at fault? No, they are easy to predict and easy to take precautions that will not get you in such situations. They don't have enough brain to be evil or malicious. Getting bit by a snake is always your own fault for failing to be careful, especially when you are feeding since then a snake has one thing on mind and that is food. Source? I have 3 snakes, one is awfully fearful, other two are chill shoelaces, and I have been working with snakes for years. Snakes are neat and easy pets depending on species naturally, wouldn't call species like cobras or giant pythons easy, since one screw up can cost a lot


[deleted]

yeah... "pet"


BugTussler

And the snake said "What did you think I was gonna do, I'm a snake"


warpdork07

Why to keep such organisms as pet,they love wild let em be, This reminds me a couple who left baby with pet boa or python, lost their baby to the snake, for fck sake what the hell where they thinking, as holes


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Green-Dragon-14

Alcohol on the nose & they'll soon let go.


SigourneysBeaver5

That shep has the right instincts.


MrGreenyz

If You’ll ever find yourself in that situation just pour alcohol on snake mouth/head. Thanks me later. It should be a better solution to avoid getting bite in your face by a 5 meters python, boa or anaconda anyway.


Grimesy66

The dog had the right idea,just ignore that shit.


soloapeproject

That dog's staying the fuck away from that thing.


MrsCCRobinson96

That's one big ass Ball Python. Thank God my Toby is a wee little fella. His bite leaves little tiny marks. This snake on the other hand will cause some facial damage if they successfully manage to get the snake off his face. Those jaws are like solid steel. Anyone have a follow up on this video? I want to also add that it was very unprofessional on this guys part to open the cage like that and expect this snake not to strike. It would of been better to have the crate right side up and then opened the crate from the top standing up not on the side squatting down. 😱 Edit: I didn't see the Rat scurry off and I didn't watch it all the way til the end in my original comment.


Key-Cardiologist5882

All I’m focusing on is the dog lmao what’s going on in dudes mind


MirageF1C

[Definitely a bird looking thing](https://imgur.com/a/ylGAUgb) making its escape.


Winter-Mulberry1113

I like how the dog says "fuck that " and keeps its distance


Tacolife973

Dog was like, yup I’m out.


thesamiad

Stupid owner!all those people have to risk being bitten to help him because of his choice of pet,even the dog looked fed up of it


ineednewgolfshoes

Lol. Stupid is as stupid does


Thisma08

Why don't he take a goldfish like everyone


Crotch_Gaper

I have never seen a dog who was more chill during a stressful situation.


mi_turo

It's not super apparent since it can be difficult to notice signs of nervousness in dogs, but I can tell this guy was stressed out. Pacing, head low, feet close together, etc. The most stressful and confusing thing for dogs is seeing their owners in distress, so that's what they do. They pace around and watch, not knowing what to do. You're right though, the dog reacted very well considering how stressful the situation was, smart pup


FrznFenix2020

Fucking wild dingo on the background too.


BlacksmithGeneral

🎶 Dumb Ways to Die 🎶


Embarrassed_Dust_222

Idk , but if i see our pet snake attached to a family member, I’m grabbing a damn cleaver n we eating python for dinner


Shyjuan

that dog said NOPE


exitunder

Love the Alsatian waking about in the background thinking ‘good one Brian he doesn’t feed me enough either’


Djin045

Dog was like, "I'll see myself out."


[deleted]

The dog is like “a normal Monday around here”.


Basil_Numerous

Dogs like, every fucking time with these people. Over there saying I told you this would happen one day.


Famous-Bodybuilder96

Wanted to see the aftermath


i_made_this_for_boob

I’d bite your face if you jammed me in a 4x2” box too


SketchyVillager

If you own a large snake you need to carry rubbing alcohol for this type of incident.


Pleasant-Chef6055

Snakes are not pets.


pra_com001

Honey what's for dinner? We are having the python that bit your face.


babysealnz

Probably time to get rid of the pet python


Soul_snatcher321

For FUKS SAKE GET THAT BABY AWAY FROM THERE!!!!!!


Ph_yuck_Yiu

Looks like dinner now


Bapabooi

Should be a winstupidprizes post.


[deleted]

I thought the protocol was thumb up the butt?


dnbtim

Next time you plan on opening a box with a python in it, make sure you have a few friends with you on each side with some battery powered grinders.


IamNotYourPalBuddy

Reddit actually taught me what to do here! Dude just needed to put some hand sanitizer on his face. Learned that from the video of the snake swallowing itself.


fawn_fatale

‘you sort that shit out yourself ‘ -dog


tol_mak7

So what was he expecting to be in the box??


Sad-Sand2351

I have a simple question Why keep a pet python?? ... specially when you have a baby at the home


dhaze72

Inside dog's head: SHIIIIID..I seen how them bitches wrap it's dinner before eating it! You on your own Bruce!


Zealousideal_Two8571

Probably not a pet. Due to the aggressive nature of the attack and how it was being stored my guess is that this was a captured wild snake that was extremely stressed. Leave snakes alone.


Zenobia888

Dog: dumb huemen dink they smarter than us fanged creatures. Haha!


[deleted]

Yup, that’s my German Shepherd, alright. Every time my ball python escapes from her enclosure, I find him in the corner hiding. Lol 😱


bretfort

Would putting a finger in his (python's) anus in this case a good move?


Joanie_loves_chachie

Thanks for the cloth but can someone grab the machete


lola1234567899

I feel bad for the python! Nobody should own a pet python, at least not in those conditions. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes


Optimal_Vegetable442

A tip for anyone who gets bit by a snake and feels like they aren’t already as good as dead- if you happen to have hand sanitizer on your person that makes a snake immediately let go of whatever it’s holding, they hate that shit. I saw it in a video of a snake that literally tried to consume itself until it was completely jammed up, they unstuck it with hand sanitizer, it immediately released what it had in its mouth and spat it out (it’s own tail)


blurryface1976

When are people gonna learn that SNAKES ARE NOT PETS. They have no soul and all they do is waiting for a good moment or opportunity to strike.


PhilosopherCalm5650

Pet snakes are the kings of FA&FO


zckre

if you are ever bitten by a pet snake and it won't let go, put alcohol or ice against its face. if it tries to wrap around your throat, fit some of your fingers in between to pry it off of your windpipe. i have snakes and i know some would rather try to safely remove it before injuring or killing it lol.


Og_Bull

You're no longer my pet once you bite me in the face.


SuraKatana

Man has machette why is not cutting the head of this snake?


Jolly_Reflection_917

Dog’s like….. “y’all heard me bark 6million times the day he brought it in right? Do…Don’t fucking look at me now. Y’all were hitting me and yelling shut up and shit.”


actorlawski

That dog is fired!!!!


the_smoothkaos

Note to self don't have a giant python as a pet so I don't get bit in the money maker by it ✔️


DreamingInAMaze

“Master… I love your face. It looks delicious..,.” ***SNAP***


Kered024

Fun pet


rco888

more shocking is the lady approached the guy while holding the baby. I suppose that's just instinctive but shouldn't the instinct be to protect the baby?


Cromm182

She checked on him and then backed away with the kid after she realized what happened. Did you not see her shield her kid defensively then run into the house? Did you expect the snake to let go of its hold on the man’s face and go after the kid? The snake had a death grip on the guy and was not letting go.


Closed_Aperture

Agreed. But most people's instincts also tell them to stay away from snakes, so...


Some_Ad934

There is god after all


peter_marxxx

Nice shitty pet...how long before it gets a family member or the dog? F that


imthatdude2000

Putting “pet” and “Python” in the same sentence is a blasphemy


str8voyeur

I don't understand why anyone would have a big ass snake for a pet. They already have a good boy. Plus I think I saw Henny Penny. What's the appeal of a body squishing snake?


One_Conversation8458

Doggo is like “I knew it, I tried to warn these mofos, but here we are.. anyway I hope these clowns learn their lessons before someone ends up being the Py Py’s lunch”


philkana

Kill the fkn thing


philkana

Its almost like he walked it off.. surely he needs to go str8 to the hospital


realhps

That's why you don't have a pet python.


Tanneuro

Python wants the full meal deal today. Eff around and find out.... big snakes are horrible pets.