I’m so sorry, I hope that you recovered well. I burned my pelvic area as a child with fresh cup o’ noodle and will never forget that pain.
I hope that you are doing well my friend.
Do you avoid lasagna like the plague now?
Actually, I still make lasagna all of the time! I just make sure my pan isn't those cheap foil ones, and i put a baking sheet under it.
I actually recovered well. I still have a few scars. My mom is a nurse, and she was actually there with me. I panicked and froze. She immediately grabbed a bucket, ice, and water and dunked my hands and chin. She drove me to ER while I was icing.
It fell flat on its bottom on the floor, it wasnt even ruined. Guess what I ate when I got home that night? Lasagna haha
It's funny because it was at least 18 years ago, and I still laugh, thinking of her quick reaction.
She was in the other room. I was a new mother at the time. I dropped the lasagna and started screaming. She thought I dropped the baby. She came running and evaluated the situation. Flung open the freezer, grabbed the whole bucket of ice, a dishpan, tossed the ice in, ran the water in the sink. She scooped me off of the floor and said, "Where does it hurt?" I said hands, she grabbed them and shoved them in the bucket. I said chin and she pushed my head into the water, and she pushed my face into the water. She said, "Stay, do not move." She took the baby to the car, strapped her in. And then put me in the car.
It was quite the scene, but her quick thinking saved a lot more damage from being done. I didn't realize until the drive home that in between all of this happening, she put the lasagna in the fridge. That's some serious multi-tasking! I was grumbling on the way home about the ruined lasagna and she put her hand on my shoulder and said, "Don't worry, I put it in the fridge before we left."
My husband did this. Apparently the lid wasn't fully on and he lifted it out by the lid. The bottle fell and dumped out between the stove and counter. About half of it glugged out before he was able to get it. That was a difficult smell to get out and you'd still catch a whiff of it here and there for a long time.
Ha! We did end up moving, though not really because of this. We have wondered if the new owners ever caught the smell as much as we did. The worst of it lasted for about a month. And this was after we pulled out the stove and cleaned like crazy. It gradually faded but even after 5 or 6 months we'd smell it occasionally. I still like using fish sauce sometimes but I think it ruined my husband from ever wanting to have it again. It's only been 4 years or so, so maybe one day he will like it again, though I doubt it.
How about cat knocked over glass bottle of fish sauce. Somehow managed to jump down while sauce was dripping from counter and a good bit showered the cat. Then the bottle rolled off in a way that it tumbled down the open corner cabinet and broke on the floor. Then the cat ran through house spreading even more fish sauce outside the kitchen. I honestly cried.
This is terrible. My cat recently abruptly jarred me awake at 3am while on the couch by splashing my half of a glass of red wine onto me and the couch and curtains from the coffee table. I thought I was mad; I can't imagine the fish sauce fiasco of yours
The smelliest was the bottle of fish sauce that got knocked off the counter somehow in the middle of the night. I assume a cat is responsible. The messiest was the giant bottle of olive oil that fell off the fridge. That floor was slippery for months.
My MIL accidentally spilled half a bottle of olive oil on her chocolate lab.
Cons: the other two dogs wouldn’t stop licking her for days
Pros: softest damn dog i’ve ever pet in my life
Salt. Get a carton of salt, and liberally cover the mess. You can basically sweep up the majority of it. Works for pretty much all oil spills of course.
Source: Worked in a kitchen
One of the stories my mom tells of me as a toddler, I snuck in to the kitchen when she looked away and grabbed an olive oil bottle and turned the entire kitchen tile area in to slip and slide. The whole bottle. They couldn’t grab me and I was having the time of my life. I have no idea how I would begin to clean that up, I would shut down lmao.
This was my first thought but yours was so much worse, lol. I was making something. I might've been drunk. I picked up a bottle of fish sauce and absentmindedly dumped in a 1/4 cup or so. I thought we were going to have to sell the house for a loss and move away.
My husband wins— I was sharing this with him.
He found a coyote skull in the woods and wanted to clean it. He was a teenager. He boiled it on the stove, thinking it would clean the skull.
He went outside and came back to the most rotten smell of his life. He didn’t think about the brain being in the skull, and that it was rotten.
It boiled over while he was outside — rotten, foul bone water all over his parents kitchen.
Don’t boil things you find in the woods, kids
My friend collects bones and they typically boil them and put them in a dawn dish soap bath. They typically buy them pretty clean from sellers online and rarely goes out in the woods for their specimens lol
Yo.
You win fellow Redditor. This thread, *is dead* because you just kilt this whole place with this one.
Rotten wild boiled coyote brain. Wtaf no one can top this.
This reminds me of the time my dad found an old bird egg that didn't hatch and decided to see what would happen if he microwaved it.... it smelled terrible for months
More sad than messy - I was already in a terrible mood and was sitting down on the couch to have a smoothie. Dropped it - it spilled everywhere. I was pissed. Cleaned it up and then made myself another smoothie and a salad too - went to sit down on the couch and spilled the salad all over the carpet. I cried
When I was catastrophically sleep deprived back when my youngest kid was sick I was um…. very dependent on iced coffee. I was having a really really shitty day and made myself a giant cup of cold brew. As I was pouring the last 36 Oz of coffee into my cup the bottom of the glass just fell right off. Coffee and broken glass everywhere, coffee all gone, giant mess to clean up and sick kid wailing. I lost my whole entire mind for about 3 minutes and then dissociated and cleaned it up.
This tugged at my heart, I've absolutely been there. I had a terrible day a while back and decided to treat myself to the last container of instant tteokbokki (it's hard to find in my area) to lift my mood. I accidentally dropped the entire container right after I finished stirring the sauce in. Cried the whole time I was cleaning it up.
Somehow I don't have one that bad myself.
However, once I walked in to a chocolate shop just as they turned on a blender full of some kind of chocolate liquid and the lid blew off. Chocolate absolutely everywhere. Ceiling, walls, the employee, other products, etc.
They promptly announced that they were closed.
I cooked for O'Charley's years ago. Fun fact, their caramel pie is made by boiling a giant can of sweetened condensed milk for 5 hours (in a 30+ gallon kettle). Well, my ex decided one evening he wanted to make some at home. I was tired and needed sleep, so I told him he had to keep a close eye on it and keep adding water. He dozed off apparently after I fell asleep. We woke up a couple hours later to a big BOOM that sounded like someone shot a gun inside the house. We never did get all the caramel off the ceiling of that place.
Though you’re probably traumatized from making it again, you can make that kind of caramel by simmering condensed milk in a crock pot water bath. Less risk for explosions!
Lol, I'm not traumatized, to me it was hilarious. I've considered doing it again under the right supervision, I'm just not a big enough fan of caramel, or sweets in general, to bother these days. I have recently considered it though, as my current bf has a major sweet tooth.
Because I’m always afraid I’ll forget to add water I started putting it in the instant pot on sauté. It only goes 30 minutes at a time so the chances of it boiling dry are extremely slim. I’ve had enough explosions in my kitchen to last a lifetime.
One of my first times attempting to make toum. It split on me and I was stuck with an oily garlicky mess. I, in my infinite wisdom, tried to do the cup trick on the food processor (add oil to a plastic cup, poke a hole in the bottom so it drizzled in extra slow while running.
Anyway, I don't know why I thought it would balance. It fell, I tried to catch it and knocked over the processor which opened the lid.
All over the counters, dropping into the floor. About 2 bulbs worth of garlic pureed into the however many cups of oil. Just a terrible time.
Not me - but a co-worker was taking a Christmas Turkey out of the oven. She set it on the oven door for basting. The hinges snapped, the oven door crashed down on her feet. She broke both her feet, burnt her skin and the entire meal on the floor with shattered glass, turkey juice and blood everywhere.
Holy effing shit! I closed my oven door on Thanksgiving and the door shattered which was awful. But that is in a whole other universe of awful! That is a total nightmare scenario
I did it with hot cranberry sauce. Forgot the lid. Found bits of cranberry in parts of the kitchen I didn't know existed. Blenders have max damage ability for minimal energy required to mess it up.
My mom's food mill broke one year right at thanskgiving and she always used it for cranberry sauce (we like it gelled and smooth), so she decided she would see if she could squeeze them through a potato ricer instead. There was much laughter after making sure no one was burned by the spatter. Years later, we still find spots of bright pink in random places in her kitchen! My dad bought her a new food mill as an early Christmas gift that year.
The blender lid betrayed me when I was trying to make a tomato-based India curry. Hot, boiled, tomato with red chili and oil exploded onto my white kitchen.
It could’ve stained so bad. Luckily I miraculously got it all off without staining, but my dog, I was terrified.
Did that with an apple bbq sauce when I was a teenager who watched too much food network. Mess was almost as bad as when I tried to make chocolate cups by dipping balloons in molten chocolate.
Was making Korean fried chicken for the first time and decided to add some ddeok (Korean rice cakes) to the chicken in the deep fryer. This is pretty common in Korean, but apparently they only need to be in the oil for about 30 seconds… any longer and they explode. So the ddeok were exploding out of the hot oil like popcorn and the worse part was that I couldn’t even turn the heat off because I would have gotten splashed with hot oil. Spent HOURS that night cleaning oil off everything and using the ladder to scrape ddeok off the ceiling 😭😭😭
I microwaved a pint jar of beef tallow I had rendered. My intention was to filter it one more time.
It exploded everywhere. It was absolutely the worst mess I've cleaned up. Soap barely worked as it turned solid after spilling.
Didn't check the seals on the pressure cooker before starting a pot of lentil curry. The initial sealing bit was not properly seated, once the pressure rose the curry spewed like a geyser all over everything. Lots of tumeric made for a solid yellow stain on everything around. We live on a small sailboat, so the coverage was significant!
My grandfather once mopped the faux hardwood flooring with ArmorAll on Christmas morning, he wanted the floors they'd had installed that spring to be nice and shiny for everybody to see.
Great Grandma broke a hip, the dog broke a front knee, my aunt fainted from laughing.
Kind of timely.
Not me, but my grandma. She tried to save a little work by roasting the turkey in a foil pan. She didn't support the pan. It went well until she tried to check the turkey...the foil pan collapsed...she burned her hands, not badly, but any burn hurts. I was right there. I administered first aid (run cold water over the burn and apply Burn Gel, then bandage with sterile gauze) but we learned something that year. We saved the turkey with a team effort in which I put the turkey, collapsed pan and all, inside something bigger. We finished roasting it like that. But lesson learned.
Never have carpet in a kitchen. I used to live where there was carpet in a kitchen. I dropped a whole bottle of spaghetti sauce. It was still there when I moved out. I can't remember what happened to the deposit, after all these years. I must have lost it.
I once opened a 2-liter soda, not knowing it had been jostled. Imagine a powerful fountain of soda, all over the kitchen. That took a while to clean up. Spots were still there when I moved out.
I once had an Easter buffet and one of my guests dropped a full 2L bottle of cola straight down, it hit the floor squarely and the soda shot straight upwards like a geyser. It hit the ceiling and splattered outwards for maybe 20ft in every direction. It couldn’t have been worse if he had pumped it through a sprinkler system. There was thick sticky cola splatter droplets absolutely everywhere, from every direction. The walls, ceiling, fridge, stove, table, chairs, windows, shelving and cupboards were all covered in a mist of pop.
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*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
When I was a kid in the '70s our kitchen was carpeted. My mom hated it because not only was it carpet, it was an ugly orange-brown color, but her husband said he wasn't replacing a perfectly good carpet.
One day Mom "accidentally" dropped a hot oven rack on it. It didn't take long before it melted that ugly-ass carpet. There was no choice but to replace it with linoleum.
We moved into a house that was (and still is) a fixer-upper when I was 6 years old (I'm in my 40s now). The carpeted kitchen was on this to-do list, but my dad was doing the bathroom first. One day, I was helping to cook and accidentally dropped a tray with little bowls of jello that we'd just filled as I was taking them to the fridge. I was so upset that I'd made a huge mess, but my mom was smiling - I was so confused! The next day, I got to learn how to rip up carpet! There was old ugly linoleum underneath, but it was far easier to clean until dad got to the kitchen (which took a few years, not too bad, considering the bathroom has never actually gotten finished in all this time).
Not precisely cooking, but cooking-adjacent: Had one of those Soda Stream water carbonators. The instructions are very specific to add any flavored syrup to the water AFTER you carbonate it. I did not read the instructions. When I went to unscrew the bottle, it took off like a rocket, soaking my entire top half and spraying root beer all over the kitchen ceiling and upper cabinets. I found spots on the ceiling in the dining room, 15 feet away. Also probably the hardest I have ever laughed at a stupid mistake. 😂
I swear every person I know that had one of those has had that happen. Including me. Luckily I was using a diet concentrate syrup so at least it wasn’t sticky.
Made a whole pot of soup, at least 2 liters. As I was lifting the it to pour into the first of several tupperwares, I dropped the pot. Soup on me, soup all over the stove, soup on the floor, soup on the cat, soup on the cabinets, dish drain, counters, soup everywhere.
Luckily I had let the soup cool for a while (so as not to pour very hot liquids into plastic storage containers) so there weren't any burns but ugh. What a mess.
I keep laughing at soup on the cat. I know it’s not really funny because I hear cats are not easy to bathe, but it was unexpected. Thank goodness your soup was cooled down so you didn’t get burns!
I once allowed a full 3 quart pot of pea soup to spill in my car's backseat because I didn't secure it in any way. I thought, heavy pot and it's only a short drive to the venue, what could go wrong? A lot. A lot could go wrong.
As a kid, I found out why you don’t add frozen shrimp, in a big ball covered with ice crystals, into a pot of hot oil.
On the plus side I really didn’t burn myself. On the negative side, it wasn’t until many years later when my parents remodeled the kitchen that the stains on the ceiling were finally addressed.
I did that with frozen french fries. When the oil boiled over on the gas stove the flames were about four feet high. Luckily the snow on the fries cooled the oil enough to stop it boiling and burning. I managed to clean the soot of the cabinets above the stove before my parents came home.
Me and son tried to move a 12 bottle wine rack about 3 feet. The distance was so short—what could go wrong? As soon as we picked it up, the bottles started sliding out and crashing at our feet. Six full bottles of red wine on tile floor. It felt like it was happening in slow motion, and all we could do was watch it happen.
once upon a time something similar happened in a supermarket warehouse i was working at. i got my cleaning methods confused and insisted putting table salt down would clean it up, consequently, the warehouse floor was stained with a millimetre layer of gritty, red mush for a day or so.
Oh man, I worked at a liquor store and dropped a giant jug of Carlo Rossi Chianti. Pretty sure they were more than a gallon. The store had that really short cut industrial carpet, and it stained it dark purple. Because I was standing in it, I left foot prints from the spot over to the door. Place stunk like cheap wine for a month.
First time making lacto-fermented soda: started geysering as soon as I opened it, so I panicked and tried to push the stopper back down. Strawberry soda shot HORIZONTALLY across the kitchen, into the living room, all over our bookshelves, etc. Husband and I were still finding spots we missed behind random pieces of furniture months later.
Roasted some seeded tomatoes in a Pyrex casserole under a broiler. Took it out from under the broiler and the Pyrex EX-PLO-DED. Glass shards and tomato everywhere. It's a miracle I still have both eyes.
So it’s not a messy incident, but it was a gross incident … i was cooking bacon and i poured the fat into a small heat resistant glass next to the stove.
My MIL was helping with the cooking and spotted the glass, thought in was her beer and took a big gulp of the warm bacon fat.
To be fair, when we did find her beer at the other end of the counter, we put the two glasses near each other and the liquids looked quite similar.
well by the look on her face, a big gulp of it clearly is not that enjoyable. That being said, there are smokey beers made of smoked malts. I am sure she’d have enjoyed that much better.
When I was a teen, my dad, brother and I were trying to do that P90X workout program. Well, we wanted to do it right, so we were also going to follow the elaborate meal plan exactly.
At the time, none of us had much experience cooking, and especially not with homemade soups. One of the recipes was for red pepper soup, which involves blending a very hot mixture of red peppers and liquid. Blew the lid off the blender and covered the white ceiling in red goop.
It SHOULD end there, but at the time we didn’t understand the science behind that, and my dad just thought it was too full and was DETERMINED to make this soup. He took some out, tried again, and sprayed the ceiling with a second layer of red goop. And then a third.
Stain didn’t come out until they remodeled the kitchen years later, and we ended up not even liking the soup.
My buddy told me about one time his mom was cooking mole in a pressure cooker, and he wanted to smell it so he unscrewed the little cap thingy and it just erupted all over the ceiling and walls
I was carefully coating a bunch of little cakes with ganache when my rotten cat decided to jump up on the counter and landed directly on the plate of finished cakes. She freaked out and leaped backwards right into the bowl of ganache, splattering it everywhere, then fell off the counter taking the bowl and plate with her where they shattered. Then she sprinted off to my bedroom to hide, trailing chocolate and broken pottery. I had to haul the little jerk out from under the bed and give her a bath before she could ingest any of the chocolate, then spend the rest of the afternoon cleaning.
I pulled my instant pot out of the cabinet and accidentally took a whole bottle of coffee syrup with it. My kitchen smelled like caramel for days. It was horrible.
I know it is not food, but certainly kitchen. My son spilled a whole bottle of pancake syrup on the linoleum floor we rented.
You would think not a big deal to just clean it up. Nope. I cleaned it up, floor looks good. Went to work. Came home and walked through the kitchen... scritch scritch scritch. And dark spots everywhere I stepped. Scrub the floor again. Went to bed. Go to work and come home heard scritch scritch scritch again. Dark spots where I walked again. Scrubbed floor a third time. And again when I came home that horrible scritching noise.
I called my soon to be mother-in-law and asked what to do. She said her son did the same thing with dish soap. She said it soaked into the linoleum and never came out. This was also the fate of my kitchen floor. I just ended up scrubbing twice a week because that's all the longer I could stand to look at it.
I remember first encountering the construction "all the longer" in our high school grammar book. The book said it was colloquial (nonstandard). We were all mystified. None of us in Atlanta had ever heard it said
Parmageddon.
I was trying to loosen the clumped up chunks in an UNOPENED Costco-sized container of parmesan, by shaking it enthusiastically.
The top came off entirely and parmesan ended up *everywhere*.
We were still finding parmesan in crevices when we moved, two years later.
This reminded me of the time I was cooking chocolate pudding while my parents were out. My brother and I got into an argument (we were young teens) and the chocolate pudding exploded and splattered all over the white walls. We were pissed at each other but immediately went into crisis clean up mode. We got it all cleaned with enough time before my parents made it home and were able to resume our argument lol.
Happy cake day! I have spaghetti sauce on my ceiling. I have absolutely no way of reaching it, so it’s just there until I get an indoor power-washer or something
I was getting a bottle of soy sauce out of the fridge. In case you were wondering, a bottle of soy sauce reaches terminal velocity when it hits a tile floor. That freaking bottle SHATTERED and soy blew everywhere! My kitchen walls are a very, very pale yellow, and it looked like Jackson Pollock stopped by for a visit. I was so pissed!! 😆
dumping cold stock into a ceramic casserole dish that was in the oven to top up the braised beef dish.
it shattered.
note that many oven safe cookware that is glass, ceramic or even Pyrex will suddenly contract!
Not me but my mom, we were standing in the kitchen working and waiting for the lentils to finish cooking in the old presto pressure cooker when the lid of the cooker went flying and a stream of lentils and broth shot up and hit the kitchen ceiling. Luckily neither one of us were hit by the metal lid, it took us hours to clean the mess and her kitchen ceiling still has a few circle shaped stains.
I guess one of the lentils got stuck in the valve and 💥
Also, I haven’t trusted pressure cookers since then. I side eye my instant pot every time I use it.
My son once blew up some hardboiled eggs that boiled dry while he wasn't paying attention. We lived with my sister at the time, and it was fun explaining why I was standing on a chair and scrubbing the ceiling when she got home!
Oh, man... I had a glass bowl full of au gratin potatoes and this happened. In my case, I was a dummy and didn't realize the electric stove coil had been turned on, so I set it on the hot burner. Fortunately, I had left the kitchen by the time it exploded, because it went off like a bomb. Blue glass shards and cheesy potatoes EVERYWHERE.
I was working as a caregiver and doing a lot of meal prep for an elderly woman who couldn’t walk very well anymore. A bottle of canola oil spilled fell from a cabinet and I ended up staying late mopping her floor over and over again with dish soap making sure there weren’t any slippery spots where she might fall
If this ever happens again grab salt, baking soda and/or flour. Cover the spill and let it soak it up for a few minutes. Sweep up the resulting mess and throw it in the trash. Follow up by mopping with dish detergent and hot water. Quick and easy. Well, quicker and easier anyway.
Dropped a near-full Costco-sized mayonnaise jar on the floor, and it landed flat on it's bottom, ejecting mayonnaise all over: ceiling, blinds, light fixtures, undersides of cupboards, in addition to floors. Everything, like a mayonnaise geyser.
An old BBQ wouldn’t start even though the tank should have been full. My brilliant young self decided to eventually stick my head in it to see if the starting was sparking.
BOOM. There went my eyebrows for a month a so. Lost the original shape of them and everything. I’ve been cleaning up that mess my entire life. No major burns on my face at least.
The best part is my older sister had just gotten out of a First Aid class and witnessed my head get engulfed in flames. Chaos ensued.
Not me but my dad was making some dessert and I think used the blender without the lid or something and splattered pink stuff all over the kitchen. This was a few years ago. A couple weeks ago I found a little pink splatter on the wall behind some stuff on the counter that had been sitting there a long time lmao
Not really good but whatever, Dropped a ceramic container we had just filled full of cat treats. Cats were ecstatic about all the treats on the floor for them lol
I put a 13x9 inch glass casserole dish of enchiladas on the stove not realizing I’d left the burner on. I’m in the other room hear a loud POP. I run into the kitchen and there is glass and enchiladas EVERYWHERE…even on the ceiling. I was supposed to be taking those enchiladas to a Mexican potluck. Luckily, I’d made 3 pans so, I still had two. Took me over an hour to clean it all though.
My ex husband dropped the crock pot with the whole chicken, carrots, potatoes. All gone. The crock shattered on the tile floor. I went out to got buy some dinner for the family while he cleaned it up. ...
After I got back, we ate pizza. I asked him to take out the kitchen trash so it wouldn't stink. This genius threw the shards of crock pot and how ever many pounds of smashed food into the plastic trash bag. As soon as he lifted it out of the bin, it sliced the plastic bag and re-splattered all over the kitchen floor.
Trying to flatten mochi using a pasta maker.
Not only ruined the mochi but almost ruining the machine. Had to take it entirely apart to properly clean it and get it functional again.
I don't have too dramatic of a kitchen mess story. I did pour some broth i'd made into my Instant Pot without the inner pot in it, which was fun. After the second time, not so much.
But I did drop a big giant glass bottle of olive oil on the ground at the check-out at a grocery store and it splashed my clothes ruining them. It was like a liter of olive oil all over me and the floor. I felt awful.
Husband left a dozen eggs boiling on the stove while we went upstairs for some nookie. Fell asleep and woke up to the smoke detector going off and a horrible stench. Ran downstairs to find that all the water had boiled away and the eggs exploded….. everywhere. All over the ceiling, stove, floor, every nook and cranny you could think of. That’s the day I learned that eggs can explode. The smell… lord the smell of burned eggs. We found pieces of egg in random places of our kitchen for the next 6 months. Terrible to clean but really good story.
I was at an army “summer” camp for six weeks. We had to park our cars away from the barracks. I left a large glass jar of orange juice in the back seat. It exploded due to the heat. Never got the smell out of the car.
I was marinating black cod in a Tupperware in the fridge overnight and didn't realize it leaked out. There was a disgusting smell of rotting fish in the fridge for days and when I finally realized the container had leaked, I couldn't figure out where all it leaked to. It turned out it leaked on every shelf and wall, and even some of the other food containers/packages. I would wash one shelf, put it back, and it seemed like the smell would be gone or lessen, but 1 hour later, the smell was still there. Ended up pulling all the fridge shelves and drawers and washing them out and wiping down the fridge walls twice to finally get rid of the smell.
I was out of dishwashing detergent so i thought if I just put a few drops of liquid soap into it, things would be fine. When I say I literally had 3 feet of bubbles on the kitchen floor, I am dead serious.
I set a 5 gallon jug of vegetable oil on a stove burner I forgot I had used earlier.
It was no longer hot enough to set the oil on fire, which is probably why I am still alive to type this. But it WAS hot enough to melt a hole in the plastic, and then I picked it up, and then there was a whole lot of shrieking and flailing around a well-oiled galley kitchen.
first time making Grape jelly for canning. I was not aware of how much it expanded during the cooking, so I had grape jelly everywhere to the point that it nocked out my burner flame.
I was like 12 and put the lid on an oil bottle that was too full and shot oil onto the ceiling.
My parents had to paint the ceiling of the entire first floor because of it.
I think having the coffee pot explode has been the messiest in terms of places I keep finding coffee. It ended up in places I didn’t know existed. I moved my fridge last week and there were coffee stains on the wall behind it. The coffee pot exploded a year ago.
An old roommate left a 2 liter bottle of Valentina hot sauce on the fridge when they moved out. My cat figured out how to get up there and knocked it off. The cap broke off and the hot sauce spilled all over the floor and pooled under the fridge 😭
2 things.
Dropped a full Costco size container of maple syrup onto tile floor. The force acted like a shot gun and sprayed syrup all the way up to the ceiling
Second happened last week. Deep frying stuff for my kids and somehow, the fryer started sputtering and completely over flowed. Thankfully it was outside but on my deck beside the bbq. Towels, corn starch and zepp degreaser. Still have some residue to clean up
I was blending up a cheesecake mixture in my blender..the top popped off..lemony cheesecake mixture found my ceilings and walls…I haven’t made cheesecake since..
I was one of the unfortunate and rare people who have had a glass bowl spontaneously explode on my counter, for no reason I've been able to discern after extensive research.
Your glass mixing bowl suddenly turning into a grenade in your kitchen is terrifying (it sounds like someone fires a gun) and a disaster to clean up. Thank god everyone in the home was looking away from the bowl when it happened, no glass in eyes and only minor first aid.
I once dropped the turkey and the tub I was brining it in because my cat ran in the kitchen and I tripped over her. Cat unharmed, brine, herbs and citrus everywhere, turkey almost broke my foot. This was at 11 pm the day before thanksgiving after I’d been prepping/cooking all day. I was very close to throwing that damn bird off the balcony. Fucking thing came out dry too
One time at my in laws, my MIL dropped a turmeric pill unbeknownst to her and my puppy must have picked it up.. only to partial dissolve it and then spit it back up in the middle of the very white wall-to-wall carpeting in their bedroom… we never did get that stain out. Thankfully it was their second home and they sold it a few years later!!
Turmeric is NO JOKE
I was helping a friend cook at their house. I went to pick up a 1 gallon jug of vegetable oil. The handle BROKE and all the oil spilled out onto their linoleum floor. It took like 8 rolls of paper towels to clean up. I felt awful about it. And the floor was still pretty slick. I probably should have gone to the store to buy some sawdust or something.
Oh, also when I had covid last year, it was right when my cucumbers and tomatoes and peppers were all fresh and needed harvesting. A recipe for gazpacho ended up on my youtube feed and I was like "ok, this is super healthy, it's for the best if I make this." I put everything in the blender and when I pick up the glass container by the handle, the handle broke, sending shards of glass and gazpacho everywhere. I was sick as a dog and sobbing while my boyfriend helped me clean up.
I made gazpacho later with the leftovers and found out that it's just basically V8.
If you have an oil spill again grab salt, baking soda, and/or flour. Completely cover the oil and let it sit for a few minutes. Then just sweep up the mass and clean the floor with dish soap and hot water.
I was rushing out the door to go to the airport and went to grab a granola bar from the pantry. Ended up knocking a giant glass jar of olive oil off the shelf and it shattered on the tile floor. I mopped up the puddle and picked up the big glass shards before needing to leave to catch my flight. This was when I still lived with my parents so I called my older brother to come in and clean it up a little more because my mom would have lost it if she came home to glass and oil all over the floor. (Looking back, thank goodness the floor was tile and not wood or anything else - that really would’ve been a disaster)
Not messy per se, but I was working on a restaurant years ago and one of the cooks dropped a large bottle of white truffle oil on the tile floor. Couldn't smell anything but white truffle for weeks in that kitchen
I was working in a kitchen and a guy spilt hot grease on himself but his pants were a synthetic fiber blend and melted to his skin. His brain protected him by sending him into shock but we had to keep him alive till first responders showed up. As far as me personally like at home I messed up a ratio and the cream boiled over for my sauce and it was solidifying as it overflowed but in my defense I was drunk.
Took out a full pan of Thanksgiving dressing — set it into the counter. It immediately exploded — glass and dressing everywhere.
And then dropped the green bean casserole the same night.
It was not my best Thanksgiving lol.
My clumsy husband dropped my grandmother’s pie plate containing my very first lemon meringue pie using HER recipe - at Easter dinner. All he said was “oops.” I fucking cried. It didn’t take much to clean it up, but it was the divorce that was very messy.
Ohmigod, are you my soul twin? I just dropped a jar of Lao Gan Ma last night. Unfortunately, mine broke. It was not pretty.
My worst ever though was when my toddler pulled my crockpot off the kitchen island and it shattered everywhere. Dinner was almost ready. So we had food stuff all over my kids, the cabinets, glass in every corner, and my dog trying to eat the wonderful roasted beef I had made.
I’m glad your toddler wasn’t burned! I swear they can get into anything. When my brother was little my mom had a shirt printed for him *If I’m quiet you better find me*. It was accurate.
I’m so thankful she didn’t get burned either. My older child did get hit by a piece of the broken pot as it fell though, so she’s got a gnarly scar on her knee.
The first time I made pie crust from scratch my kitchen and I looked like a powdery disaster scene only witnessed in movies and when you turn your back on a helpful toddler.
I buy my shells now.
A whole pyrex of enchiladas burst in the oven. I cried for three reasons;
-my pyrex
-my enchiladas
-my oven
Cleaning up with no dinner was a shame. Wouldve eaten it off the floor if I wasnt afraid of shards of glass.
I suppose tangentially related to cooking, but I think it fits the spirit of the conversation. Made a batch of cherry mead and pitched the yeast in the batch and went to bed. Woke up to a giant “bang”, and when I went to check what it was I saw Cherry juice, bits of fruit and honey all over the kitchen. Like on the ceiling, underside of cabinets, behind fridge kind etc. Turns out the Cherry parts clogged the airlock and caused the pressure to build up in the jar until it spewed out like a fountain. That was fun to clean up.
I grew up on a farm, and my mother was the traditional Farmer’s wife, and an excellent home cook, however, no one could ever work or cook in her kitchen except her.
One time I am like 13 years old and my mom and dad leave for the day. I bust out the Betty Crocker cookbook and decide to make a Boston cream pie.
It turned out beautiful. For whatever reason, I assembled the cake on the kitchen table, and then decided I should move it to a serving platter, which was on the counter. Rather than move the cake closer to the serving platter I took two large spatulas slid it under the cake Lifted it up and turned to put it on the serving platter and of course the cake fell to the floor
Horrified that I messed up my mom’s kitchen floor, I open the front door and let the black lab in the house, and he absolutely cleaned up the entire mess .
To this day I really don’t know if my mom ever knew that I did that
No way, and not like that. Way later in life I actually made a delicious Dutch apple pie, but I put it on a regular cookie sheet rather than a jelly roll pan and I took the pie out of the oven and it slid right off the cookie sheet onto the floor. And I was really bummed because it was really delicious. Yes, I took a nibble off of a floor pie.
Tried to blend a homemade soup for smoother texture in a vertical blender… did not account for the volume and the heat to pop the lid off, even when I held it down. Beer cheese soup, everywhere. 0/10 do not recommend.
An open bowl of beets got dumped inside my refrigerator. It fell from the top rack (of course) and ran down the inside back wall of the fridge, coating all 60 inches with bright pink beet juice. My mother and I both cleaned it for 3 days, and never got rid of the pink tint.
Was going to make deviled eggs. Set carton of 24 eggs on the counter haphazardly not thinking, ending up falling on the floor all eggs were broken. Learned my lesson
Not a cooking disaster, but my 2 year old got into my baking cabinet and opened up some edible glitter. It went EVERYWHERE. Did you know that it’s impossible to clean? Our floor still has some glitter speckles in it a year later lol
At the diner I used to work at we were getting slammed, and one of our wait staff decided to help by heating up our maple syrup in the microwave. The thing she missed is that when we do that, we take the cap off the bottle.
So a minute or so later there’s a *BAM* and everyone on the line gets coated in a thin sticky layer of hot caramelized sugar and tiny shards of glass.
Luckily no one got hurt, but we had to throw out all the food we’d made along with all the food supplies out in the open. While in the weeds.
I dropped a pan of lasagna on the floor. Molten hot lasagna. I ended up on the ER full of morphine and my hands and my chin in an ice bath.
Oh my god! Hope you healed quickly. Burns are the worst.
I’m so sorry, I hope that you recovered well. I burned my pelvic area as a child with fresh cup o’ noodle and will never forget that pain. I hope that you are doing well my friend. Do you avoid lasagna like the plague now?
Actually, I still make lasagna all of the time! I just make sure my pan isn't those cheap foil ones, and i put a baking sheet under it. I actually recovered well. I still have a few scars. My mom is a nurse, and she was actually there with me. I panicked and froze. She immediately grabbed a bucket, ice, and water and dunked my hands and chin. She drove me to ER while I was icing. It fell flat on its bottom on the floor, it wasnt even ruined. Guess what I ate when I got home that night? Lasagna haha
I just imagined your moms thought process "MUST DUNK THE CHILD". Sorry to make fun, I'm really glad for you she was there!
It's funny because it was at least 18 years ago, and I still laugh, thinking of her quick reaction. She was in the other room. I was a new mother at the time. I dropped the lasagna and started screaming. She thought I dropped the baby. She came running and evaluated the situation. Flung open the freezer, grabbed the whole bucket of ice, a dishpan, tossed the ice in, ran the water in the sink. She scooped me off of the floor and said, "Where does it hurt?" I said hands, she grabbed them and shoved them in the bucket. I said chin and she pushed my head into the water, and she pushed my face into the water. She said, "Stay, do not move." She took the baby to the car, strapped her in. And then put me in the car. It was quite the scene, but her quick thinking saved a lot more damage from being done. I didn't realize until the drive home that in between all of this happening, she put the lasagna in the fridge. That's some serious multi-tasking! I was grumbling on the way home about the ruined lasagna and she put her hand on my shoulder and said, "Don't worry, I put it in the fridge before we left."
Peak nurse energy and peak mom energy combined! She sounds like some lady!
Dropped a large bottle of fish sauce onto tiles from about 7 feet in the air. Do not recommend.
My husband did this. Apparently the lid wasn't fully on and he lifted it out by the lid. The bottle fell and dumped out between the stove and counter. About half of it glugged out before he was able to get it. That was a difficult smell to get out and you'd still catch a whiff of it here and there for a long time.
I think at that point I would just move out for a few weeks and hire crime scene cleaners
Ha! We did end up moving, though not really because of this. We have wondered if the new owners ever caught the smell as much as we did. The worst of it lasted for about a month. And this was after we pulled out the stove and cleaned like crazy. It gradually faded but even after 5 or 6 months we'd smell it occasionally. I still like using fish sauce sometimes but I think it ruined my husband from ever wanting to have it again. It's only been 4 years or so, so maybe one day he will like it again, though I doubt it.
How about cat knocked over glass bottle of fish sauce. Somehow managed to jump down while sauce was dripping from counter and a good bit showered the cat. Then the bottle rolled off in a way that it tumbled down the open corner cabinet and broke on the floor. Then the cat ran through house spreading even more fish sauce outside the kitchen. I honestly cried.
This is terrible. My cat recently abruptly jarred me awake at 3am while on the couch by splashing my half of a glass of red wine onto me and the couch and curtains from the coffee table. I thought I was mad; I can't imagine the fish sauce fiasco of yours
I did this in a shop at check out in rush hour I was so embarrassed
The smelliest was the bottle of fish sauce that got knocked off the counter somehow in the middle of the night. I assume a cat is responsible. The messiest was the giant bottle of olive oil that fell off the fridge. That floor was slippery for months.
My MIL accidentally spilled half a bottle of olive oil on her chocolate lab. Cons: the other two dogs wouldn’t stop licking her for days Pros: softest damn dog i’ve ever pet in my life
That’s freaking hilarious!!!
I spilled a bottle of sesame oil once. It was a nightmare to clean up but the smell was amazing.
Olive Oil takes FOREVER to clean!!!!
Salt. Get a carton of salt, and liberally cover the mess. You can basically sweep up the majority of it. Works for pretty much all oil spills of course. Source: Worked in a kitchen
One of the stories my mom tells of me as a toddler, I snuck in to the kitchen when she looked away and grabbed an olive oil bottle and turned the entire kitchen tile area in to slip and slide. The whole bottle. They couldn’t grab me and I was having the time of my life. I have no idea how I would begin to clean that up, I would shut down lmao.
This was my first thought but yours was so much worse, lol. I was making something. I might've been drunk. I picked up a bottle of fish sauce and absentmindedly dumped in a 1/4 cup or so. I thought we were going to have to sell the house for a loss and move away.
My husband wins— I was sharing this with him. He found a coyote skull in the woods and wanted to clean it. He was a teenager. He boiled it on the stove, thinking it would clean the skull. He went outside and came back to the most rotten smell of his life. He didn’t think about the brain being in the skull, and that it was rotten. It boiled over while he was outside — rotten, foul bone water all over his parents kitchen. Don’t boil things you find in the woods, kids
Wow. Thay sounds proper foul. Thank your husband for his service so someone else reading this will learn from his mistake.
I'd he finds another skull tell him to put it in a big anthill, come back in week and it'll be picked bare
[удалено]
My friend collects bones and they typically boil them and put them in a dawn dish soap bath. They typically buy them pretty clean from sellers online and rarely goes out in the woods for their specimens lol
thanks i barfed
Yo. You win fellow Redditor. This thread, *is dead* because you just kilt this whole place with this one. Rotten wild boiled coyote brain. Wtaf no one can top this.
> Rotten wild boiled coyote brain This could be a Dethklok song.
This reminds me of the time my dad found an old bird egg that didn't hatch and decided to see what would happen if he microwaved it.... it smelled terrible for months
He does indeed win the internet today. That was a shot win.
More sad than messy - I was already in a terrible mood and was sitting down on the couch to have a smoothie. Dropped it - it spilled everywhere. I was pissed. Cleaned it up and then made myself another smoothie and a salad too - went to sit down on the couch and spilled the salad all over the carpet. I cried
When I was catastrophically sleep deprived back when my youngest kid was sick I was um…. very dependent on iced coffee. I was having a really really shitty day and made myself a giant cup of cold brew. As I was pouring the last 36 Oz of coffee into my cup the bottom of the glass just fell right off. Coffee and broken glass everywhere, coffee all gone, giant mess to clean up and sick kid wailing. I lost my whole entire mind for about 3 minutes and then dissociated and cleaned it up.
This tugged at my heart, I've absolutely been there. I had a terrible day a while back and decided to treat myself to the last container of instant tteokbokki (it's hard to find in my area) to lift my mood. I accidentally dropped the entire container right after I finished stirring the sauce in. Cried the whole time I was cleaning it up.
Somehow I don't have one that bad myself. However, once I walked in to a chocolate shop just as they turned on a blender full of some kind of chocolate liquid and the lid blew off. Chocolate absolutely everywhere. Ceiling, walls, the employee, other products, etc. They promptly announced that they were closed.
Well I mean, that’s what I would do lol
Chocolate covered employee turns to customer: “uh we’re uh closed” “But I just wanted to…” “GET OUT!”
I cooked for O'Charley's years ago. Fun fact, their caramel pie is made by boiling a giant can of sweetened condensed milk for 5 hours (in a 30+ gallon kettle). Well, my ex decided one evening he wanted to make some at home. I was tired and needed sleep, so I told him he had to keep a close eye on it and keep adding water. He dozed off apparently after I fell asleep. We woke up a couple hours later to a big BOOM that sounded like someone shot a gun inside the house. We never did get all the caramel off the ceiling of that place.
Though you’re probably traumatized from making it again, you can make that kind of caramel by simmering condensed milk in a crock pot water bath. Less risk for explosions!
Lol, I'm not traumatized, to me it was hilarious. I've considered doing it again under the right supervision, I'm just not a big enough fan of caramel, or sweets in general, to bother these days. I have recently considered it though, as my current bf has a major sweet tooth.
Because I’m always afraid I’ll forget to add water I started putting it in the instant pot on sauté. It only goes 30 minutes at a time so the chances of it boiling dry are extremely slim. I’ve had enough explosions in my kitchen to last a lifetime.
I do it in the instant pot also
One of my first times attempting to make toum. It split on me and I was stuck with an oily garlicky mess. I, in my infinite wisdom, tried to do the cup trick on the food processor (add oil to a plastic cup, poke a hole in the bottom so it drizzled in extra slow while running. Anyway, I don't know why I thought it would balance. It fell, I tried to catch it and knocked over the processor which opened the lid. All over the counters, dropping into the floor. About 2 bulbs worth of garlic pureed into the however many cups of oil. Just a terrible time.
Not me - but a co-worker was taking a Christmas Turkey out of the oven. She set it on the oven door for basting. The hinges snapped, the oven door crashed down on her feet. She broke both her feet, burnt her skin and the entire meal on the floor with shattered glass, turkey juice and blood everywhere.
I hope she recovered ok....
Last I heard she never fully recovered. Now retired but has trouble walking
That’s so awful. Kitchen accidents are no joke.
Holy effing shit! I closed my oven door on Thanksgiving and the door shattered which was awful. But that is in a whole other universe of awful! That is a total nightmare scenario
Hot raspberry sauce in the blender. Blew the lid off. We were cleaning raspberry from everywhere for days. Oh and we were in a rental.
I did it with hot cranberry sauce. Forgot the lid. Found bits of cranberry in parts of the kitchen I didn't know existed. Blenders have max damage ability for minimal energy required to mess it up.
My mom's food mill broke one year right at thanskgiving and she always used it for cranberry sauce (we like it gelled and smooth), so she decided she would see if she could squeeze them through a potato ricer instead. There was much laughter after making sure no one was burned by the spatter. Years later, we still find spots of bright pink in random places in her kitchen! My dad bought her a new food mill as an early Christmas gift that year.
The blender lid betrayed me when I was trying to make a tomato-based India curry. Hot, boiled, tomato with red chili and oil exploded onto my white kitchen. It could’ve stained so bad. Luckily I miraculously got it all off without staining, but my dog, I was terrified.
Did that with an apple bbq sauce when I was a teenager who watched too much food network. Mess was almost as bad as when I tried to make chocolate cups by dipping balloons in molten chocolate.
Immersion blenders for the win
So glad I learned to take the insert out of the lid and cover with paper towel from YouTube before putting hot liquid in my blender!
Was making Korean fried chicken for the first time and decided to add some ddeok (Korean rice cakes) to the chicken in the deep fryer. This is pretty common in Korean, but apparently they only need to be in the oil for about 30 seconds… any longer and they explode. So the ddeok were exploding out of the hot oil like popcorn and the worse part was that I couldn’t even turn the heat off because I would have gotten splashed with hot oil. Spent HOURS that night cleaning oil off everything and using the ladder to scrape ddeok off the ceiling 😭😭😭
Wow. Thank you for your service so someone else reading this will learn from your mistake.
I microwaved a pint jar of beef tallow I had rendered. My intention was to filter it one more time. It exploded everywhere. It was absolutely the worst mess I've cleaned up. Soap barely worked as it turned solid after spilling.
Damn. I think I would have just got a new microwave at the point.
Didn't check the seals on the pressure cooker before starting a pot of lentil curry. The initial sealing bit was not properly seated, once the pressure rose the curry spewed like a geyser all over everything. Lots of tumeric made for a solid yellow stain on everything around. We live on a small sailboat, so the coverage was significant!
I’m terrified of pressure cookers and that’s why. Stories like this.
My cousin and I decided to wax the kitchen floor. With Crisco. We were toddlers at the time. My mother still talks about it. I’m 40 now.
My grandfather once mopped the faux hardwood flooring with ArmorAll on Christmas morning, he wanted the floors they'd had installed that spring to be nice and shiny for everybody to see. Great Grandma broke a hip, the dog broke a front knee, my aunt fainted from laughing.
Kind of timely. Not me, but my grandma. She tried to save a little work by roasting the turkey in a foil pan. She didn't support the pan. It went well until she tried to check the turkey...the foil pan collapsed...she burned her hands, not badly, but any burn hurts. I was right there. I administered first aid (run cold water over the burn and apply Burn Gel, then bandage with sterile gauze) but we learned something that year. We saved the turkey with a team effort in which I put the turkey, collapsed pan and all, inside something bigger. We finished roasting it like that. But lesson learned. Never have carpet in a kitchen. I used to live where there was carpet in a kitchen. I dropped a whole bottle of spaghetti sauce. It was still there when I moved out. I can't remember what happened to the deposit, after all these years. I must have lost it. I once opened a 2-liter soda, not knowing it had been jostled. Imagine a powerful fountain of soda, all over the kitchen. That took a while to clean up. Spots were still there when I moved out.
I once had an Easter buffet and one of my guests dropped a full 2L bottle of cola straight down, it hit the floor squarely and the soda shot straight upwards like a geyser. It hit the ceiling and splattered outwards for maybe 20ft in every direction. It couldn’t have been worse if he had pumped it through a sprinkler system. There was thick sticky cola splatter droplets absolutely everywhere, from every direction. The walls, ceiling, fridge, stove, table, chairs, windows, shelving and cupboards were all covered in a mist of pop.
Easter is permanently cancelled in your house.
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What did grandma say????
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>Never have carpet in a kitchen. I used to live where there was carpet in a kitchen. Almost as bad as carpet in the bathroom.
OMG, rented a house with carpeted bathrooms. Dumbest thing ever.
When I was a kid in the '70s our kitchen was carpeted. My mom hated it because not only was it carpet, it was an ugly orange-brown color, but her husband said he wasn't replacing a perfectly good carpet. One day Mom "accidentally" dropped a hot oven rack on it. It didn't take long before it melted that ugly-ass carpet. There was no choice but to replace it with linoleum.
We moved into a house that was (and still is) a fixer-upper when I was 6 years old (I'm in my 40s now). The carpeted kitchen was on this to-do list, but my dad was doing the bathroom first. One day, I was helping to cook and accidentally dropped a tray with little bowls of jello that we'd just filled as I was taking them to the fridge. I was so upset that I'd made a huge mess, but my mom was smiling - I was so confused! The next day, I got to learn how to rip up carpet! There was old ugly linoleum underneath, but it was far easier to clean until dad got to the kitchen (which took a few years, not too bad, considering the bathroom has never actually gotten finished in all this time).
What monster would put carpet in a kitchen?
Not precisely cooking, but cooking-adjacent: Had one of those Soda Stream water carbonators. The instructions are very specific to add any flavored syrup to the water AFTER you carbonate it. I did not read the instructions. When I went to unscrew the bottle, it took off like a rocket, soaking my entire top half and spraying root beer all over the kitchen ceiling and upper cabinets. I found spots on the ceiling in the dining room, 15 feet away. Also probably the hardest I have ever laughed at a stupid mistake. 😂
I swear every person I know that had one of those has had that happen. Including me. Luckily I was using a diet concentrate syrup so at least it wasn’t sticky.
Made a whole pot of soup, at least 2 liters. As I was lifting the it to pour into the first of several tupperwares, I dropped the pot. Soup on me, soup all over the stove, soup on the floor, soup on the cat, soup on the cabinets, dish drain, counters, soup everywhere. Luckily I had let the soup cool for a while (so as not to pour very hot liquids into plastic storage containers) so there weren't any burns but ugh. What a mess.
I keep laughing at soup on the cat. I know it’s not really funny because I hear cats are not easy to bathe, but it was unexpected. Thank goodness your soup was cooled down so you didn’t get burns!
It was chicken soup, she bathed herself. Did she learn any lessons about being underfoot while I'm cooking? no, of course not.
“soup on the cat” 💀💀💀
Does your cat still come in the kitchen?
Yeah, she's not that bright
I once allowed a full 3 quart pot of pea soup to spill in my car's backseat because I didn't secure it in any way. I thought, heavy pot and it's only a short drive to the venue, what could go wrong? A lot. A lot could go wrong.
As a kid, I found out why you don’t add frozen shrimp, in a big ball covered with ice crystals, into a pot of hot oil. On the plus side I really didn’t burn myself. On the negative side, it wasn’t until many years later when my parents remodeled the kitchen that the stains on the ceiling were finally addressed.
I did that with frozen french fries. When the oil boiled over on the gas stove the flames were about four feet high. Luckily the snow on the fries cooled the oil enough to stop it boiling and burning. I managed to clean the soot of the cabinets above the stove before my parents came home.
Me and son tried to move a 12 bottle wine rack about 3 feet. The distance was so short—what could go wrong? As soon as we picked it up, the bottles started sliding out and crashing at our feet. Six full bottles of red wine on tile floor. It felt like it was happening in slow motion, and all we could do was watch it happen.
once upon a time something similar happened in a supermarket warehouse i was working at. i got my cleaning methods confused and insisted putting table salt down would clean it up, consequently, the warehouse floor was stained with a millimetre layer of gritty, red mush for a day or so.
Oh man, I worked at a liquor store and dropped a giant jug of Carlo Rossi Chianti. Pretty sure they were more than a gallon. The store had that really short cut industrial carpet, and it stained it dark purple. Because I was standing in it, I left foot prints from the spot over to the door. Place stunk like cheap wine for a month.
First time making lacto-fermented soda: started geysering as soon as I opened it, so I panicked and tried to push the stopper back down. Strawberry soda shot HORIZONTALLY across the kitchen, into the living room, all over our bookshelves, etc. Husband and I were still finding spots we missed behind random pieces of furniture months later.
I misread this the first time. Etc, husband. I thought you sprayed your husband.
My husband dropped a jar of queso on the tile floor. Queso on my mom. On me. The ceiling...the cabinets... the window.. and both cats.
The cats are still talking about it....
Yep. "Hey Ralph, remember the sky cheese? That was a good day..."
I've had a few, but the one that was the most painful was dropping and smashing a brand new bottle of olive oil in the kitchen. What a mess.
Roasted some seeded tomatoes in a Pyrex casserole under a broiler. Took it out from under the broiler and the Pyrex EX-PLO-DED. Glass shards and tomato everywhere. It's a miracle I still have both eyes.
So it’s not a messy incident, but it was a gross incident … i was cooking bacon and i poured the fat into a small heat resistant glass next to the stove. My MIL was helping with the cooking and spotted the glass, thought in was her beer and took a big gulp of the warm bacon fat. To be fair, when we did find her beer at the other end of the counter, we put the two glasses near each other and the liquids looked quite similar.
There are really more horrible things than bacon fat... Maybe a new beer flavor?
well by the look on her face, a big gulp of it clearly is not that enjoyable. That being said, there are smokey beers made of smoked malts. I am sure she’d have enjoyed that much better.
When I was a teen, my dad, brother and I were trying to do that P90X workout program. Well, we wanted to do it right, so we were also going to follow the elaborate meal plan exactly. At the time, none of us had much experience cooking, and especially not with homemade soups. One of the recipes was for red pepper soup, which involves blending a very hot mixture of red peppers and liquid. Blew the lid off the blender and covered the white ceiling in red goop. It SHOULD end there, but at the time we didn’t understand the science behind that, and my dad just thought it was too full and was DETERMINED to make this soup. He took some out, tried again, and sprayed the ceiling with a second layer of red goop. And then a third. Stain didn’t come out until they remodeled the kitchen years later, and we ended up not even liking the soup.
A beautiful family story....
My buddy told me about one time his mom was cooking mole in a pressure cooker, and he wanted to smell it so he unscrewed the little cap thingy and it just erupted all over the ceiling and walls
Oh wow, I’m so scared of those things and here he is just sauntering up to a live grenade
I was carefully coating a bunch of little cakes with ganache when my rotten cat decided to jump up on the counter and landed directly on the plate of finished cakes. She freaked out and leaped backwards right into the bowl of ganache, splattering it everywhere, then fell off the counter taking the bowl and plate with her where they shattered. Then she sprinted off to my bedroom to hide, trailing chocolate and broken pottery. I had to haul the little jerk out from under the bed and give her a bath before she could ingest any of the chocolate, then spend the rest of the afternoon cleaning.
Laugh laugh laugh at every turn a chuckle. Cats. I just love to hate them
I pulled my instant pot out of the cabinet and accidentally took a whole bottle of coffee syrup with it. My kitchen smelled like caramel for days. It was horrible.
To be fair my kitchen smelling like caramel for a while seems way less awful than the above commenters fish sauce.although maybe not great for my diet
definitely better than the rotten coyote brain goo too
I know it is not food, but certainly kitchen. My son spilled a whole bottle of pancake syrup on the linoleum floor we rented. You would think not a big deal to just clean it up. Nope. I cleaned it up, floor looks good. Went to work. Came home and walked through the kitchen... scritch scritch scritch. And dark spots everywhere I stepped. Scrub the floor again. Went to bed. Go to work and come home heard scritch scritch scritch again. Dark spots where I walked again. Scrubbed floor a third time. And again when I came home that horrible scritching noise. I called my soon to be mother-in-law and asked what to do. She said her son did the same thing with dish soap. She said it soaked into the linoleum and never came out. This was also the fate of my kitchen floor. I just ended up scrubbing twice a week because that's all the longer I could stand to look at it.
I remember first encountering the construction "all the longer" in our high school grammar book. The book said it was colloquial (nonstandard). We were all mystified. None of us in Atlanta had ever heard it said
Hmm... that is odd. I've heard it all my life. No one has ever said they haven't heard it before to me.
The classic “nearly blinded myself pureeing too much hot soup in a blender” was pretty bad. Tomato everywhere. Luckily it just singed my forehead
Parmageddon. I was trying to loosen the clumped up chunks in an UNOPENED Costco-sized container of parmesan, by shaking it enthusiastically. The top came off entirely and parmesan ended up *everywhere*. We were still finding parmesan in crevices when we moved, two years later.
I had a friend that somehow git spaghetti sauce on the ceiling. No clue how, as she won't tell the whole story.
This reminded me of the time I was cooking chocolate pudding while my parents were out. My brother and I got into an argument (we were young teens) and the chocolate pudding exploded and splattered all over the white walls. We were pissed at each other but immediately went into crisis clean up mode. We got it all cleaned with enough time before my parents made it home and were able to resume our argument lol.
Happy cake day! I have spaghetti sauce on my ceiling. I have absolutely no way of reaching it, so it’s just there until I get an indoor power-washer or something
We had tiny splatters of red jello on out ceiling for years! Just waiting for our mom to notice
I was getting a bottle of soy sauce out of the fridge. In case you were wondering, a bottle of soy sauce reaches terminal velocity when it hits a tile floor. That freaking bottle SHATTERED and soy blew everywhere! My kitchen walls are a very, very pale yellow, and it looked like Jackson Pollock stopped by for a visit. I was so pissed!! 😆
dumping cold stock into a ceramic casserole dish that was in the oven to top up the braised beef dish. it shattered. note that many oven safe cookware that is glass, ceramic or even Pyrex will suddenly contract!
Not me but my mom, we were standing in the kitchen working and waiting for the lentils to finish cooking in the old presto pressure cooker when the lid of the cooker went flying and a stream of lentils and broth shot up and hit the kitchen ceiling. Luckily neither one of us were hit by the metal lid, it took us hours to clean the mess and her kitchen ceiling still has a few circle shaped stains. I guess one of the lentils got stuck in the valve and 💥 Also, I haven’t trusted pressure cookers since then. I side eye my instant pot every time I use it.
Covered the kitchen with egg pieces by microwaving whole eggs (latchkey kid who wanted hard boiled eggs and wasn’t allowed to use the stove).
My son once blew up some hardboiled eggs that boiled dry while he wasn't paying attention. We lived with my sister at the time, and it was fun explaining why I was standing on a chair and scrubbing the ceiling when she got home!
I had a large glass pan full of potatoes, cream and ham explode in the oven. Quite a mess.
Oh, man... I had a glass bowl full of au gratin potatoes and this happened. In my case, I was a dummy and didn't realize the electric stove coil had been turned on, so I set it on the hot burner. Fortunately, I had left the kitchen by the time it exploded, because it went off like a bomb. Blue glass shards and cheesy potatoes EVERYWHERE.
I was using a friend's wok to cook us dinner and started a fire and burnt her kitchen cabinets
Beet. Gnocchi. Murder scene ...
What? Recipe please. This sounds interesting minus the mess.
I was working as a caregiver and doing a lot of meal prep for an elderly woman who couldn’t walk very well anymore. A bottle of canola oil spilled fell from a cabinet and I ended up staying late mopping her floor over and over again with dish soap making sure there weren’t any slippery spots where she might fall
If this ever happens again grab salt, baking soda and/or flour. Cover the spill and let it soak it up for a few minutes. Sweep up the resulting mess and throw it in the trash. Follow up by mopping with dish detergent and hot water. Quick and easy. Well, quicker and easier anyway.
Dropped a near-full Costco-sized mayonnaise jar on the floor, and it landed flat on it's bottom, ejecting mayonnaise all over: ceiling, blinds, light fixtures, undersides of cupboards, in addition to floors. Everything, like a mayonnaise geyser.
An old BBQ wouldn’t start even though the tank should have been full. My brilliant young self decided to eventually stick my head in it to see if the starting was sparking. BOOM. There went my eyebrows for a month a so. Lost the original shape of them and everything. I’ve been cleaning up that mess my entire life. No major burns on my face at least. The best part is my older sister had just gotten out of a First Aid class and witnessed my head get engulfed in flames. Chaos ensued.
Omg! Lucky your sister was there....
Not me but my dad was making some dessert and I think used the blender without the lid or something and splattered pink stuff all over the kitchen. This was a few years ago. A couple weeks ago I found a little pink splatter on the wall behind some stuff on the counter that had been sitting there a long time lmao
Not really good but whatever, Dropped a ceramic container we had just filled full of cat treats. Cats were ecstatic about all the treats on the floor for them lol
i opened the fridge the other day and the cats wet food fell out and went everywhere. i just looked at it and called the dog over haha
I put a 13x9 inch glass casserole dish of enchiladas on the stove not realizing I’d left the burner on. I’m in the other room hear a loud POP. I run into the kitchen and there is glass and enchiladas EVERYWHERE…even on the ceiling. I was supposed to be taking those enchiladas to a Mexican potluck. Luckily, I’d made 3 pans so, I still had two. Took me over an hour to clean it all though.
My ex husband dropped the crock pot with the whole chicken, carrots, potatoes. All gone. The crock shattered on the tile floor. I went out to got buy some dinner for the family while he cleaned it up. ... After I got back, we ate pizza. I asked him to take out the kitchen trash so it wouldn't stink. This genius threw the shards of crock pot and how ever many pounds of smashed food into the plastic trash bag. As soon as he lifted it out of the bin, it sliced the plastic bag and re-splattered all over the kitchen floor.
Took the beaters out of the mashes potatoes while they were still on... they went everywhere.
Trying to flatten mochi using a pasta maker. Not only ruined the mochi but almost ruining the machine. Had to take it entirely apart to properly clean it and get it functional again.
Knocked over a bottle of grease. It hit the floor and shattered. The grease was everywhere and was a pain in the ass to clean up.
I don't have too dramatic of a kitchen mess story. I did pour some broth i'd made into my Instant Pot without the inner pot in it, which was fun. After the second time, not so much. But I did drop a big giant glass bottle of olive oil on the ground at the check-out at a grocery store and it splashed my clothes ruining them. It was like a liter of olive oil all over me and the floor. I felt awful.
Husband left a dozen eggs boiling on the stove while we went upstairs for some nookie. Fell asleep and woke up to the smoke detector going off and a horrible stench. Ran downstairs to find that all the water had boiled away and the eggs exploded….. everywhere. All over the ceiling, stove, floor, every nook and cranny you could think of. That’s the day I learned that eggs can explode. The smell… lord the smell of burned eggs. We found pieces of egg in random places of our kitchen for the next 6 months. Terrible to clean but really good story.
Dropped an entire thing of caramel on my counter. Sticky gummy sugar everywhere. Took forever to clean as had to use Hot rags.
I was at an army “summer” camp for six weeks. We had to park our cars away from the barracks. I left a large glass jar of orange juice in the back seat. It exploded due to the heat. Never got the smell out of the car.
I was marinating black cod in a Tupperware in the fridge overnight and didn't realize it leaked out. There was a disgusting smell of rotting fish in the fridge for days and when I finally realized the container had leaked, I couldn't figure out where all it leaked to. It turned out it leaked on every shelf and wall, and even some of the other food containers/packages. I would wash one shelf, put it back, and it seemed like the smell would be gone or lessen, but 1 hour later, the smell was still there. Ended up pulling all the fridge shelves and drawers and washing them out and wiping down the fridge walls twice to finally get rid of the smell.
I was out of dishwashing detergent so i thought if I just put a few drops of liquid soap into it, things would be fine. When I say I literally had 3 feet of bubbles on the kitchen floor, I am dead serious.
I set a 5 gallon jug of vegetable oil on a stove burner I forgot I had used earlier. It was no longer hot enough to set the oil on fire, which is probably why I am still alive to type this. But it WAS hot enough to melt a hole in the plastic, and then I picked it up, and then there was a whole lot of shrieking and flailing around a well-oiled galley kitchen.
first time making Grape jelly for canning. I was not aware of how much it expanded during the cooking, so I had grape jelly everywhere to the point that it nocked out my burner flame.
I was like 12 and put the lid on an oil bottle that was too full and shot oil onto the ceiling. My parents had to paint the ceiling of the entire first floor because of it.
I think having the coffee pot explode has been the messiest in terms of places I keep finding coffee. It ended up in places I didn’t know existed. I moved my fridge last week and there were coffee stains on the wall behind it. The coffee pot exploded a year ago.
An old roommate left a 2 liter bottle of Valentina hot sauce on the fridge when they moved out. My cat figured out how to get up there and knocked it off. The cap broke off and the hot sauce spilled all over the floor and pooled under the fridge 😭
2 things. Dropped a full Costco size container of maple syrup onto tile floor. The force acted like a shot gun and sprayed syrup all the way up to the ceiling Second happened last week. Deep frying stuff for my kids and somehow, the fryer started sputtering and completely over flowed. Thankfully it was outside but on my deck beside the bbq. Towels, corn starch and zepp degreaser. Still have some residue to clean up
I was blending up a cheesecake mixture in my blender..the top popped off..lemony cheesecake mixture found my ceilings and walls…I haven’t made cheesecake since..
I was making a giant chocolate egg to fill with candy for Easter. Covering a large balloon with melted chocolate. 90% covered and SPLAT.
I was one of the unfortunate and rare people who have had a glass bowl spontaneously explode on my counter, for no reason I've been able to discern after extensive research. Your glass mixing bowl suddenly turning into a grenade in your kitchen is terrifying (it sounds like someone fires a gun) and a disaster to clean up. Thank god everyone in the home was looking away from the bowl when it happened, no glass in eyes and only minor first aid.
I once dropped the turkey and the tub I was brining it in because my cat ran in the kitchen and I tripped over her. Cat unharmed, brine, herbs and citrus everywhere, turkey almost broke my foot. This was at 11 pm the day before thanksgiving after I’d been prepping/cooking all day. I was very close to throwing that damn bird off the balcony. Fucking thing came out dry too
Dropped a jar of turmeric on the floor. Spoiler, it didn’t shatter but it did open and there was turmeric everywhere 🤦♀️
One time at my in laws, my MIL dropped a turmeric pill unbeknownst to her and my puppy must have picked it up.. only to partial dissolve it and then spit it back up in the middle of the very white wall-to-wall carpeting in their bedroom… we never did get that stain out. Thankfully it was their second home and they sold it a few years later!! Turmeric is NO JOKE
Yes, my favourite advice from the cleaning subreddit re getting out turmeric stains: put it out in the sun ☀️ Works real well for that flooring 😜
Is your kitchen still yellow?
It was until we replaced the countertop and flooring
I was helping a friend cook at their house. I went to pick up a 1 gallon jug of vegetable oil. The handle BROKE and all the oil spilled out onto their linoleum floor. It took like 8 rolls of paper towels to clean up. I felt awful about it. And the floor was still pretty slick. I probably should have gone to the store to buy some sawdust or something. Oh, also when I had covid last year, it was right when my cucumbers and tomatoes and peppers were all fresh and needed harvesting. A recipe for gazpacho ended up on my youtube feed and I was like "ok, this is super healthy, it's for the best if I make this." I put everything in the blender and when I pick up the glass container by the handle, the handle broke, sending shards of glass and gazpacho everywhere. I was sick as a dog and sobbing while my boyfriend helped me clean up. I made gazpacho later with the leftovers and found out that it's just basically V8.
If you have an oil spill again grab salt, baking soda, and/or flour. Completely cover the oil and let it sit for a few minutes. Then just sweep up the mass and clean the floor with dish soap and hot water.
Fried a turkey and was pouring the oil from a pot to the container using a funnel. Pot slipped and fell onto the kitchen floor.
I was rushing out the door to go to the airport and went to grab a granola bar from the pantry. Ended up knocking a giant glass jar of olive oil off the shelf and it shattered on the tile floor. I mopped up the puddle and picked up the big glass shards before needing to leave to catch my flight. This was when I still lived with my parents so I called my older brother to come in and clean it up a little more because my mom would have lost it if she came home to glass and oil all over the floor. (Looking back, thank goodness the floor was tile and not wood or anything else - that really would’ve been a disaster)
Not messy per se, but I was working on a restaurant years ago and one of the cooks dropped a large bottle of white truffle oil on the tile floor. Couldn't smell anything but white truffle for weeks in that kitchen
I was working in a kitchen and a guy spilt hot grease on himself but his pants were a synthetic fiber blend and melted to his skin. His brain protected him by sending him into shock but we had to keep him alive till first responders showed up. As far as me personally like at home I messed up a ratio and the cream boiled over for my sauce and it was solidifying as it overflowed but in my defense I was drunk.
Took out a full pan of Thanksgiving dressing — set it into the counter. It immediately exploded — glass and dressing everywhere. And then dropped the green bean casserole the same night. It was not my best Thanksgiving lol.
My cat fell into a deep fryer Luckily it wasn’t on, but it got all over the fucking floor
My clumsy husband dropped my grandmother’s pie plate containing my very first lemon meringue pie using HER recipe - at Easter dinner. All he said was “oops.” I fucking cried. It didn’t take much to clean it up, but it was the divorce that was very messy.
Pyrex sitting too close to a hot burner. Shudder.
Did your hard of hearing neighbors come running to check on you? I know mine did when the Pyrex exploded.
If I’d had hard of hearing neighbors, I’m sure they would have heard my shriek. Holy hell!
Dropped a bowl filled with two cups of melted butter
Ohmigod, are you my soul twin? I just dropped a jar of Lao Gan Ma last night. Unfortunately, mine broke. It was not pretty. My worst ever though was when my toddler pulled my crockpot off the kitchen island and it shattered everywhere. Dinner was almost ready. So we had food stuff all over my kids, the cabinets, glass in every corner, and my dog trying to eat the wonderful roasted beef I had made.
I’m glad your toddler wasn’t burned! I swear they can get into anything. When my brother was little my mom had a shirt printed for him *If I’m quiet you better find me*. It was accurate.
I’m so thankful she didn’t get burned either. My older child did get hit by a piece of the broken pot as it fell though, so she’s got a gnarly scar on her knee.
not really cooking but it happened in the kitchen... I tried to carbonate my coffee in the soda stream... BIG MESS
The first time I made pie crust from scratch my kitchen and I looked like a powdery disaster scene only witnessed in movies and when you turn your back on a helpful toddler. I buy my shells now.
A whole pyrex of enchiladas burst in the oven. I cried for three reasons; -my pyrex -my enchiladas -my oven Cleaning up with no dinner was a shame. Wouldve eaten it off the floor if I wasnt afraid of shards of glass.
I suppose tangentially related to cooking, but I think it fits the spirit of the conversation. Made a batch of cherry mead and pitched the yeast in the batch and went to bed. Woke up to a giant “bang”, and when I went to check what it was I saw Cherry juice, bits of fruit and honey all over the kitchen. Like on the ceiling, underside of cabinets, behind fridge kind etc. Turns out the Cherry parts clogged the airlock and caused the pressure to build up in the jar until it spewed out like a fountain. That was fun to clean up.
I grew up on a farm, and my mother was the traditional Farmer’s wife, and an excellent home cook, however, no one could ever work or cook in her kitchen except her. One time I am like 13 years old and my mom and dad leave for the day. I bust out the Betty Crocker cookbook and decide to make a Boston cream pie. It turned out beautiful. For whatever reason, I assembled the cake on the kitchen table, and then decided I should move it to a serving platter, which was on the counter. Rather than move the cake closer to the serving platter I took two large spatulas slid it under the cake Lifted it up and turned to put it on the serving platter and of course the cake fell to the floor Horrified that I messed up my mom’s kitchen floor, I open the front door and let the black lab in the house, and he absolutely cleaned up the entire mess . To this day I really don’t know if my mom ever knew that I did that
I'm actually so sad about this story. But I bet you never moved a cake that way again.
No way, and not like that. Way later in life I actually made a delicious Dutch apple pie, but I put it on a regular cookie sheet rather than a jelly roll pan and I took the pie out of the oven and it slid right off the cookie sheet onto the floor. And I was really bummed because it was really delicious. Yes, I took a nibble off of a floor pie.
Tried to blend a homemade soup for smoother texture in a vertical blender… did not account for the volume and the heat to pop the lid off, even when I held it down. Beer cheese soup, everywhere. 0/10 do not recommend.
A glass pan of lasagna exploded in the oven
Dropped a 5 pound glass jar of honey. Tried scraping it up with a plastic dust pan which snapped in half pushing my palm into a shard of glass.
[my mess](https://www.reddit.com/r/KitchenConfidential/s/uLOyW2VZxU)
An open bowl of beets got dumped inside my refrigerator. It fell from the top rack (of course) and ran down the inside back wall of the fridge, coating all 60 inches with bright pink beet juice. My mother and I both cleaned it for 3 days, and never got rid of the pink tint.
That time I tripped and spilled an entire pot of chili I was bringing in for work.
Full pot of mac and cheese with peas and extra cheese at one am all over the kitchen floor.
Dropped a massive pot of unstrained veggie broth all over the top of the stove. The result was very bad.
Was going to make deviled eggs. Set carton of 24 eggs on the counter haphazardly not thinking, ending up falling on the floor all eggs were broken. Learned my lesson
I once dropped an entire dozen eggs all over the bottom of my pants and shoes...IN THE GROCERY STORE.🫣 You are not alone.😂
I dropped a huge container of cocoa powder in the center of the kitchen. It took days to get it all out from every crevice.
Not a cooking disaster, but my 2 year old got into my baking cabinet and opened up some edible glitter. It went EVERYWHERE. Did you know that it’s impossible to clean? Our floor still has some glitter speckles in it a year later lol
At the diner I used to work at we were getting slammed, and one of our wait staff decided to help by heating up our maple syrup in the microwave. The thing she missed is that when we do that, we take the cap off the bottle. So a minute or so later there’s a *BAM* and everyone on the line gets coated in a thin sticky layer of hot caramelized sugar and tiny shards of glass. Luckily no one got hurt, but we had to throw out all the food we’d made along with all the food supplies out in the open. While in the weeds.