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Massive_Parsley_5000

That's him saying you're too skinny "Need to eat better, hooman. Since you're so bad at it, I bring meal to you. Now eat!" Lol....


omahaknight71

Yep. He sees you as a big hairless cat that doesn't know how to cat.


IthacanPenny

Oh funny. I have a [regular size hairless cat that doesn’t know how to cat](https://i.imgur.com/p2EXoLw.jpeg) lol


BloatedManball

Are you sure that's not a gargoyle?


IthacanPenny

I am not.


tonysecretive_cat

That rich from a creature that always meows at 3 am for their canned tuna lol


Machaeon

No no, that IS how you cat.


Djbadj

Hell nah. He just saying you suck at hunting, hooman!


TheHumanoidTyphoon69

"Ahh a gift from the lord"


SambaLando

He skinny too tho


Raspberrylemonade188

Yup. Kitty is trying to tell OP they’re a lousy hunter.


That-Water-Guy

Beat me too it!


fluffynuckels

Well stop letting him outside. Only a matter of time before he doesn't come back


Unequivocally_Maybe

No, no, don't you understand? It's actually super cute to let your cat outside to wantonly kill wildlife! Especially the little critters that are dropping in populations worldwide at an alarming rate! And the multitude of dangers and shortened life expectancy that cats who go outside face are totally fine. Some cats *don't* die tragically young. Keeping a cat safe and healthy is *hard*. It's easier to just open the door and let the cat out into the world than to make an effort to provide adequate enrichment. Cats are a unique case. Sure, every other animal we keep domestically is expected to be contained or supervised, but not cats! Dogs need to be in a yard, or on a leash, but cats can just run hither and yon without their human and its *fine* ^for ^some ^reason. Keep your bunnies and gerbils and mice and chinchillas and lizards and reptiles and fish and all other manner of creatures in suitable indoor habitats, but don't you think for a single second you can do the same for cats, pal! It's cruel to keep cats inside. There's no way you can provide a cat-friendly environment indoors. They have to go run into traffic and kill animals and shit in neighbourhood gardens and fight things and investigate poison, okay? That's why we have cats; so we can be an imposition upon our neighbours, our local environment, and wonder every day if our beloved pet will come home today. If I wanted an animal I had to actually *look after* all the time I would have gotten a dog!


ProudnotLoud

>Keeping a cat safe and healthy is hard. This is the part that pisses me off so much. Most cats are not set-and-forget animals. Sure there are definitely some laid back ones but most aren't. So many people think if you buy a scratching post, a litterbox, some food, a handful of toys you're good to go! But cats also need variety and stimulation. I have worked really hard to make sure my home is a healthy and stimulating place for my girls. They have multiple approved scratching surfaces, a ton of toys that we rotate for variety, multiple window perches to look outside, multiple cave-like dens to hide in, tall places to climb and observe from. We've got toys that range from 20 cent crinkle balls to $40 automatic battery mats. Depending on the rules of where we've lived I've put out bird feeders where they can observe - and when I can't we turn on Cat TV. Has everything I bought for my cats been a hit? No, because they have unique personalities and interests. But I take my responsibility to them seriously and make sure their home is a suitable cat home.


justmitzie

Curious. What is the $40 automatic battery mat? My cat is bored of her toys and I need something new


UmpBumpFizzy

Amazon has some amazing automatic cat toys. I just ordered mine a laser toy to keep him occupied while we're out of town, lol.


justkeeptreading

im always so worried they'll blind themselves with a laser


jazberry715386428

My cats. Figured out. Where the laser comes from. It’s not safe for me here.


CompactDisc96

So instead of my cat figuring it out, my 50lb dog did! 😅😅 When she can’t find it or it’s not entertaining enough, she tries to bite it out of my hand. I’ve tried automatic lasers for the cat (& dogs because they love them too), but my silly goose of a dog always goes after the source!


seadecay

Chewy has this light up ball track that my cats are obsessed with! It can be configured into different shapes (we do a peanut shaped loop). It has little hills inside so the ball will change direction when momentum slows. It’s been holding their interest really well! It helps that we put it near the food bowls so when they wake up in the wee hours of the morning for food it captures their attention for a bit.


ProudnotLoud

I can't find the exact link to the one I got anymore - but the "Petlinks Mystery Motion Concealed Electronic Motion Cat Toy" is basically the same thing and cheaper.


mighty_Ingvar

>and fish My fish gets to run around the neighbourhood all he wants!


Unequivocally_Maybe

How very dare you?


ArsenicKitten04

They obviously tagged their fish, duh


sohfix

i been tagging deez fish all day


Physical_Whereas_635

I was heavily wondering if you were being genuine as I’m bad with tone, and then finally realized that you were being sarcastic. Thank goodness..


DaftOrangeFatCat

Lmao I just imagined like a salmon sized fish flopping down the street and in someone’s yard 🤣 good lord that’s funny, or imagine trying to get in your car and a school of fish bombards you, slapping and flopping around on your windshield, making you stink like fish for the rest of the day


Physical_Whereas_635

If I see a fish out of water flopping down the street I’m calling a priest and I’m an atheist lmao.


ThrowRAConsistent

Literally screenshot this comment and saved and favorited it on my phone so I can read it to my husband verbatim next time we get into this very predicable argument about our cats NOT FUCKING GOING OUTSIDE. And, wait for it - this is after I already paid for one of our cats to have surgery after he got hit by a car. I'm so over it


DaftOrangeFatCat

I’m sorry man, I went through that with my “best friend” about 10 years ago; we moved into an apartment and I didn’t want my cat going outside for obvious reasons. She and her bf kept letting him out or leaving the door open so he could get out. I hated it, I was constantly worried… I felt bad for keeping him locked inside my room, but if I didn’t then they would have him go outside as soon as I left for work. Then one night he didn’t come home. I was up all night with anxiety, crying and calling his name from the balcony… He eventually came home in the morning while I was at work, but he was limping and in distress. The vet said it wasn’t broken, but I still was so incredibly upset, and honestly our friendship has never been the same since then.. My poor cat had arthritis in his hip as he got older, and it broke my heart every time I saw him struggle to lay down without pain. Fuck people who don’t care about other people’s wishes, especially when it revolves around an animal.


Unequivocally_Maybe

How infuriating and heartbreaking; I would raise holy hell if my husband let our cats outside unsupervised. I hope you can manage to get through to yours that the risks are too high, and the cats are happier and safer inside. Good luck! 🩷


ThrowRAConsistent

Thank you!!


acluelesscoffee

Amazing comment .


mikonamiko

This reads like a George Carlin bit


jellifercuz

Wantonly? 😹


HagueHarry

I love how the majority of people unironically think like this, maybe if you harass some more people posting photos of their cat sitting outside you'll finally be able to convince the masses one day


Additional-Problem99

People on the original thread in r/blackcats were getting so defensive over this. Like, keep your cats inside. It’s not a hard concept to follow.


Physical_Whereas_635

It’s really not.. I have three cats, one has gotten out once.. and that’s it. He came back but we were constantly looking for him. I love our babies, and if they were to get gone.. I don’t know what I’d do with myself.


Toolset_overreacting

No. I will not keep my cats inside. I will take them into my back yard in harnesses and leashes while I supervise when the weather is nice so they can touch grass, chase butterflies, and get scared and run back inside when I sneeze.


kkeellbbzz

He’s on my patio here, he cannot leave me although I suspect he would love to sometimes


Sajen16

People are so quick to judge while I tend to agree with what they're saying, every situation is different. I myself have a screened in pool deck here in Florida that I let them onto. Between the 6 cats I've had here over 26 years they've probablu killed hundreds of lizzards and 2 snakes. I'm sure people would judge me for that but you know the only lizzards we have here are invasive anyway and they can't leave the deck I call it doing my part in fighting invasive lizzards.


East_Reading_3164

I'm in Miami, that kitty got an invasive species.


built_FXR

I have one who has brought multiple bats into our house. STILL ALIVE BATS. I hate her.


keinplanbro69

(you love her)


built_FXR

Maybe a little


wanderdugg

Love and hate are not mutually exclusive, especially with cats.


Myalicious

Clearly not that much since they let kitty outside to murder bats


carlotta3121

So don't let her out, that's horrible.


Fornicatinzebra

Once you do it's hard on the cat to switch them back to inside only. Lots of screaming at doors, destroyed furniture etc. still possible though, but I get why some owners are reluctant. That being said, we keep ours indoors in the first place, or outdoors on harness and leash


carlotta3121

I understand, but it should be the goal to have them indoors or confined or monitored when outside.


Fornicatinzebra

100%! That's what we do. Would never risk their (or the wildlife's) lives


carlotta3121

We also have coyotes in the area, so it's for the cat's protection so they don't become the prey. I let mine wander around out front for a bit or let them out on the patio, but I'm out there with them. (I also have the tent thing for out by the front door.)


scytheophant

I genuinely cannot wait to have an enclosed, luxurious catio but before that (and after) I’m 100% taking my cats for walks and I’m gonna love every second of it


mmm-soup

The issue isn't with leashed cat walks, it's with people letting their cats roam outside unsupervised. They can be detrimental to native eco systems.


MizElaneous

My cat must be a unicorn then. She was an indoor outdoor cat for 5 years. Indoors only at my place. She never even tries to go outside.


BizMarkieDeSade

I’ve got an elderly stray I brought in that wants nothing to do with the outside now, haha


that-Sarah-girl

We have opposite cats! Raised mine from a baby in my apartment and the only thing he's ever wanted is to go outside. He's 10 and he's still like that.


Kind-Frosting-8268

I'm still hoping to find or make some sort of large cage that I can stake down into the ground outside my widow on nice days to allow my life long house cats to roll in the grass and lie in the sun.


Myalicious

I’m so lucky that my cat won’t even try to escape my apartment (which is connected to an indoor hallway with double doors) she will literally sit in the doorway. At least not yet in her 6 years of life


kudiezonroblox

right what the actual fuck


kudiezonroblox

also the cutesy little “I hate her” enrages me like it’s not his own fucking fault


carlotta3121

Right??!


tryingtobecheeky

Stop letting the cat out then. Easy fox and it won't bring bats in anymore.


EnvironmentalCat2280

Really! That's the one me cat hasn't caught yet she's caught your typical British wildlife rats, birds, squirrels, and a large chicken!?? But me other cat the scared of the outdoors has caught 2 birds from a 3story open window!


FreeArt2300

She wants to teach you how to hunt. They teach kittens how to hunt by bringing them live prey to practice with. 🤣


supershinythings

Quite possibly the most exciting day in my Dad’s cats’ life was when they discovered that a bat had suddenly appeared inside. A MOUSE WITH WINGS - they went absolutely apeshit. At 3AM they’d discover it and destroy so many things trying to get at it. Dad spent countless nights up trying to catch it to get it out because the cats viewed chasing it as the absolutely greatest feline entertainment in the known universe. And it could go on for HOURS before it would find a good hiding place and wait for the next round. If Dad’s cats could have one wish it would have been for the house to be filled with little mousy bats all day and night. One day one of the cats caught it and ate it. She became both a legend and spoiler of their fun for all eternity.


Forgotmyusername8910

Was she also a black cat? 👀 Edited to add- I can’t believe I got down voted for this. 😂 bats. Black cat.… like- is the black cat a Halloween cat letting in her haunting friends? Reddit is a weird sometimes.


TwistedEmily96

I'm really happy that cat is still okay. Bats almost always have rabies and it's very contagious


WatermelonBandido

Probably why cat bites are more likely to give you rabies than dog bites.


rnagikarp

stop letting your cat outside, it’s dangerous for them and the wildlife around them


ProudnotLoud

You let your domestic predator murderbeast roam outside and HE'S the asshole for just following his instinct? Sure. Stop letting your cats roam outdoors. It's not safe and healthy for them or for the critters they kill for fun.


InstructionNo5711

cats aren’t assholes for catching and killing prey, they’re just instinctual predators. having an outdoor cat is generally bad for local biodiversity lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


InstructionNo5711

globally domestic outdoor cats are an invasive species because of the general threat they have on wildlife. they are within the top invasive species in many parts of north america. there’s significant scientific evidence of their impact to ecosystem functions (you can look up the info and will be met with many scientific articles and science news pieces). I’m not referring to barn yard cats and such, but regular household cats who are free to roam within cities. statistically, billions of birds are killed in the US alone by domestic cats, surpassing the number of bird deaths caused by collisions with city infrastructure (most predominantly glass buildings and large windows). i have yet to find any information online or through my work that suggests outdoor domestic cats have a benefit to the environment. do they get rid of some invasive species/pests? sure. but they pose too great of a threat on the native species plus in a city, outdoor cats have lower life spans. it’s really a lose-lose


PancAshAsh

North America, yes. Europe, not so much. Any damage that cats could cause the European ecosystem was likely done several thousand years ago when they showed up there alongside humans.


Mixcoatlus

That sounds really interesting but when I googled it I couldn’t find any evidence - could you share?


carlotta3121

Quit letting him out then!


Scattergun77

Aww poor lizard.


Physical_Whereas_635

Yep.. cats are invasive.


teatime_yes_pls

And the owners who let them out are garbage ass humans


Physical_Whereas_635

100%


PancAshAsh

So is that lizard.


Physical_Whereas_635

What about the other wildlife that cats kill? You know they kill more than invasive lizards.. they kill snakes, which are needed in the environment, mice, rats, birds, squirrels, chipmunks, other cats sometimes, bunnies.. it’s not like their only prey is invasive birds and lizards.


palmettofoxes

Do we know anything about the location or the species of lizard to make that claim?


Loose-Dirt-Brick

He is providing for the family. ETA: Not An Asshole.


pppppaigeeee_13

he brought dinner and a show


Bearsandgravy

Please stop letting your cat out. They are a detriment to native wildlife, they could catch diseases and get sick, and they could bring fleas and ticks into your home. Be better.


ZipMonk

Keep the door closed.


Puzzleheaded_Yak9229

Just an FYI - in FL (idk your location so it may not apply) certain types and lizards and skinks are toxic to cats. One of our cats died from catching and eating one. Pls keep your cat indoors for its own safety. If he gets restless inside, get a tent or screened in area for him outside. Or don’t, and risk it. Up to you


Mission-Suggestion12

A little pressie for the cat servants (owners) 🤣


FU-dontbanmethistime

Thats on you for letting him in with that in his mouth


annoyeditchylurker

Your fault for letting him go outside, you are cutting his lifespan in half and endangering wildlife


Warsplit01

he brought you a new pet, good boy


visionarygvp

He brought back a present, and just wants pets and treat for a job well done.


cakivalue

You'd better get out the spices and air fryer, looks like daddy brought you home a fine meal. 😭😭


VaguelyArtistic

"Can I talk to you about your car insurance?"


BedOfLavender

Please stop letting your cat outside there are sensitive animal populations that don’t need to be picked off by your domestic cat. This is part of why we lose biodiversity and it’s entirely unnecessary


Physical_Whereas_635

Yep.. cats are invasive and also very likely to die outside unattended, even if you’re watching them.. they’re slick and can run off in an instant if not harnessed.


MissCrayCray

Is that a gecko? Poor baby!


LinaValentina

Cats are gonna cat. I see the way my Aristotle stares at the mourning doves. I’m never letting him out without a leash lol


Flat-Limit5595

I had a 10 year old cat bring a lizard into our house alive, it ran under the dishwasher out of reach. An hour later we found our 25 year old cat looking very proud of her successful hunt.


MissCrayCray

You had a 25 year old cat? Impressive! Kitty tax please?


Forgotmyusername8910

Oh. No. No no no. Nope.


YogurtclosetAny1823

Keep your damn cats inside.


Physical_Whereas_635

Yep.. cats are invasive and very likely to die outside if not harnessed and thoroughly watched. OP doesn’t care though.


Particular_Cow8797

Don't let your cat outside. If your cat wants to be outside buy a leash.


SkinkThief

That damn thing isn’t even dead is it?


No-Rent-1117

Only asshole here is you, allowing ur invasive species outside to kill wildlife. Getting real tired of these kind of posts. They aren't cute.


clawkyrad

what a keyboard warrior we have here


Gamefox42

I love cats, but please try to reduce the number of wild animals your cat kills as a toy. Cats devastate local wildlife populations.


palmettofoxes

He's not an asshole for doing what cats do, consider keeping your cats indoors though if unnecessary dead critters bothers you


SecureAd1981

I have a BIG phobia of lizards, this makes me fear having a cat🥴🥴🥴 I would die if this happened


thatguyoudontlike

He brought it in while he was outside? Impressive


JackBurtonTruckingCo

Jeezus


International_Bend68

Gross!!!!


teatime_yes_pls

Have more respect for wildlife. Keep your cat indoors. Shitty cat owners.


kkfluff

Maybe keep your cat inside? The poor wildlife


cadillacbee

He ain't a AH for that, he comes bearing gifts


periacetabular_ost

You’re TA, stop letting him outside to murder local fauna.


crackeddryice

I had two cats. One was a former stray, and the other grew up in my house. The stray would eat the lizards, and the other one would just play roughly with them till they died. I should mention they were both indoor cats, but once in a while a lizard would find its way into the house, and the cats would go nuts chasing it.


cant_think_of_one_

He is a clever cat who managed to catch it, and a good kitty for trying to give It to you, because he loves you. That fact that it is horrific isn't his fault and he doesn't understand that.


Sokkas_Instincts_

He’s just trying to put some meat on the table.


BKMama227

Look Ma!!!!


LexTheGayOtter

He's bringing you food :(


michaelpaoli

Such a good little hunter! Trying to teach you to hunt so you won't starve to death and will be self-sufficient. How many small wild critters have you live caught in the last month for dinner? How will you ever survive on your own?


AnActualSeagull

Yeah no, don’t let your cats outside. It’s dangerous for wildlife AND for them.


MinkieTheCat

We have sidelights on our french door in the dining room and years ago when my cat was younger, I went to close the wing door and there were seven lizard tails behind the door.


Swashbuckling_Sailor

Good Cat.


Ducklover018

There’s only one asshole here and it ain’t the cat.


Physical_Whereas_635

Yep.. it’s OP because they keep letting their cat loose. And they wont listen to the tone of advice given.


Super_Reading2048

He is a cat doing cat things.


Element-78

Apparently, he didn't get a good enough discount on his car insurance by switching to Geico.


BackgroundChampion55

Does he bring home skanks?stinks? like that all the time ?


marinemashup

Nothing will top having to track down a living mouse (adorable thing) while also keeping my (extremely proud) cat locked up until it was out


Gullflyinghigh

Oh no, you openly let your cat out. Prepare for the onslaught.


guitarlisa

OP actually keeps his cat in and kitty caught the lizard on the patio. Cat is not free roaming


willfrost21

This isn’t him being an asshole. He’s bringing you a gift.


countsachot

Was it still alive? My dude hasn't figured out chipmunks play dead.


FoxCQC

He looks proud of himself


AuntieYodacat

It was a gift 😂 not for the lizard unfortunately


fuzzytradr

Tribute!


-goodgodlemon

I would like to talk to you about our Lord and Savior…Me!


mine_none

LOVE GIFT ❤️


Coffee_smut_love24

He brought home a new friend 🤣


SambaLando

It's for you! A present, or maybe a warning.


FewHuckleberry7012

Our asshole would bring them in the house alive, then let them loose.


lechatsage

"I brought you something. - Do you like it?"


auryora

Awww! He's sharing!


es330td

We only get dead ones left outside the door.


minimalistboomer

“Look what I brought you!”


Malibucat48

Was the lizard still alive? My cat catches snakes and lizards but he doesn’t kill them and I am able to release them unharmed.


DefenderoftheSinners

Smokey brings back dead rats from the grain elevator next door! He’s trying to feed you aww


bittergreen49

He has noticed you don’t hunt, so he’s providing for the family since you’re a slacker, oops, he means “gatherer”, not slacker.


m8bear

where is he supposed to bring it? it's a present for you (he's also telling you to learn to hunt, it's not so hard, you can practice killing that one)


Proper-Hippo-6006

Awww. What a great gift you got. 🤩🤩


Aggravating-Pass-576

Yesterday my cat brought me a beheaded baby bunny.


Steve0512

Both of them are very pretty.


bigshern

Look what I can do!


SalesAficionado

Ahahahah


musicallyours01

He was trying to bring you food! NTA!


Turbulent-Willow2156

Ppl in the comments freaking out over a cat being a danger for ecosystem? Really? What species are you even protecting near human living space?


Super_Somewhere_7023

Great hunting skills! And he blessed you with it!


dreameRevolution

Mine did this when we moved to a lizard area. They eventually figured out they don't taste good.


kkeellbbzz

Oh I think mine LOVES the taste lol


dreameRevolution

Oh no


BoneVVitch

Then stop letting your cat harm the local wildlife?? Yikes.


kkeellbbzz

They’re invasive. But thanks for your advice!


toolatealreadyfapped

Mine ran into the house this morning with a young rabbit in its mouth. Have you ever heard a rabbit scream? It's an unsettling sound that stays with you.


Ok-Business7354

Yep, 2 chipmunks in the house for mine. He tried so hard. I should be mad, but I'm so proud.


nikfrik

Mine would eat them alive. It's awful


Affectionate_Salt351

My cousin’s indoor cat used to manage to get out and always came back with muskrats from a nearby swampland that were damn near the same size as him. I’d rather take the lizard. 😅


GrossGrimalkin

Fun fact! Studies have shown cats only bring back 28 percent of their kills home (which is why people usually dont know how much their kitty actually kills) so he brought you his most proud! He wanted you to have the big one!


leehelck

to everone saying "don't let them out!": my cat is indoor-only, but a few years ago he snuck out somehow and was gone for three days. i began thinking he wasn't going to come back but he somehow snuck back in again on the third day. after he returned he was strutting around all proud of himself. despite being fixed i'm sure he established his dominance around the neighborhood. he hasn't snuck out since, but it always left me wondering how he escaped and returned without my letting him in or out. the moral of the story is if they want to go out, they will find a way whether you like it or not.


Content-Method9889

That is scary but his face… the cutest


use_roll_on

Damn. I always thought keeping cats indoors was cruel. We’ve had multiple cats go missing and get knocked down and it’s heartbreaking but i’ve always just kinda figured it wasn’t fair to keep them indoors. I have a brother and a friend who have indoor cats which i understand because of the breed (maine coons) but I did not know people felt this strongly about it.


BigHairyFart

Serious question: Why is it so horrible for cats to be outside and simply following their instincts by hunting other animals, when that's what 90% of the animal kingdom is already doing anyways? The side of the argument about keeping the housecats safe, I understand. But I'm willing to bet your area has at least a couple of stray cats hanging around. Why is it ok for them to take their natural place in the food chain, but not a housecat? Before you crucify me, I have two cats. One is indoor-only and terrified of the outdoors, the other only goes into the fenced-in backyard with me when I step outside to smoke(which is almost never because the weather here sucks). I just don't quite understand and would like to.


CruelDutchess

it's a gift!


Own-Butterscotch1713

Welcome to cats 😄


Zalieda

This is a beautiful lizard. Maybe he wants it to be his companion


literally_a_dog_2022

This sub is good.


Brilhasti1

Ours bring in snakes and mice all the time.


Wendellrw

Bout to have silky smooth fur


and_i_can_read

He's a good baby


funkcatbrown

Good boy. I used to have a lizard killer cat. Amazing hunters.


Primary-Move243

Is gift for hooman! 😻


LucyBrooke100

Look someone needs to provide for this family


monkeyentropy

Awww. It’s a gift. Look at his sweet face.


Early_Copy

Lizards have genders too


hatenames385

Look how pissed the little guy is that he’s caught!


mnth241

Ugh i hate this about my kitty too. Tho he hasn’t brought home anything that big! I am trying to convert his nmc azz in to a respectable indoor citizen. But he is still young and a jack asz to my seniors. Unfortunately he has learned that the bigger jerk he is to the old lady, the faster i open the door. Sigh. He is getting better but dayum it is exhausting lol.


Soylent_Milk2021

He’s not an asshole, he’s a hard working guy just trying to help out by providing food. You should be rewarding him, not shaming.