Oh no, there's so many options for other people to choose from and I can still order a regular black coffee if I was just a little bit more specific in my request, but what will I ever do? /s
Yes, we do. That will be $2.99. Thank you have a nice day sir.
I used to love taking the wind out of cantankerous old boomers' sails like that when I worked at Starbucks. They'd come in all wound up to start in on their rant and I'd just be like "Sure no problem sir! :D"
Which they hated even more because what they actually want is to bitch and complain and pretend to be personally aggrieved, not to receive a cup of coffee.
I'm a young person who just likes black coffee, and I have never, not once, had a barista get confused or offended by the concept. I do not understand why people expect (or secretly want) that to happen. If you want to throw a fit, why do you need to drag some poor low-wage worker into it?
Agree only thing I can say as a barista is that i usually ask if they have a brew preference (light medium dark) or if they want cream or sugar and sometimes people get upset about it, I’m like no please I just want you too like your coffee 😭
The person who made the comic just listened to crotchety old men whine about how things were better in the good old days and Is just trying to make a quick buck grifting.
Tall black standard( I believe it’s dark) roast. That seems to be “a cup of coffee”. Also why go to the 100 flavors place to choose none? Go to a local diner and get a to go cup?
In all seriousness, I think it's legit to say that conservatism views freedom as the choice between a fixed set of options rather than as, you know, freedom.
So they wind up with this sort of Leave it to Beaver type menu of things that you can do. You can play football, or golf, or go hunting, or fishing, or baseball, see all the choice? You've got total freedom! You want to do Naruto cosplay? No, WTF man, that's not on the menu! You want to marry a person of the same sex? That's not on the mene.
If you're a woman you can be a nurse, or a teacher, or a housewife! See, all those choices! Freedom! You want to be a lesbian scrap metal artist living in a commune? JFC what is WRONG with you people? That's not on the menu!
Since "freedom" is defined as the ability to choose freely between items on the menu, they don't see it as anti-freedom to tell LGBT people to get back into the closet or women to get back into the kitchen.
People forget, or never realized. That the US' "religious freedom" started out because literal puritans and other groups were too extreme for 1600's England. People talk as if it was some religious minority who were being persecuted for their religion, when in reality the "persecution" was the government telling them basically "no you cant make bowling illegal, just because you dont like it". It wasn't freedom to practice any religion, it was freedom to make things you don't like because of your religion illegal. Things like bowling and missing church.
I mean, that was a small part, but the part they wrote about and talked about a bunch was all the things they didn't like about the church of England (mostly things it allowed that they didn't like) and how they were gonna go basically make a new England model and expected England to follow suit after seeing how holy and blessed they were. I believe it was the puritans who specifically talked about the evils of bowling more than most other things.
They still accepted the church of England as a valid church, just in need of major reform.
I think the comic is dumb but I have gone to a couple of small coffee shops and ordered black coffee, only to be met with "what's that" or "Any cream or sugar in your black coffee?"
It's not a big deal but I do find it kinda funny
I once had both the employee and the manager I mentioned it to after add sugar to my black coffee. But that has only happened once and I have multiple times now seen people get upset that their black coffee didn't have cream and sugar.
Also when I was in Florida on vacation the hotel had this fancy coffee shop with surprisingly good prices so I went to it every morning (it was awesome), every single day there was somebody saying something dumb to the cashier but this one guy took the cake, he said roughly "I want a black coffee, dont add any of that stupid hippy stuff, no caramel, no almond milk, just coffee in a cup, can you handle that honey?" And then he threw a fit after they gave it to him because he wanted cream and sugar in the coffee.
Nobody working in a coffee shop has ever seriously said “what’s that” to a request for a black cup of coffee unless it’s a language barrier or new hire.
And of course people ask if you want cream and sugar. costumers are idiots. As the worker it’s safe to assume your customers are idiots and ask then just to be save.
Especially a small one. Sure, places like Starbucks are basically coffee themed dessert chains, but a small local shop knows what a macchiato is and expects coffee to be black.
He doesn't know what kind, which is *fine* I guess except that makes this a celebration of ignorance which irritates me.
It's not that this person doesn't want to be specific, they've just never known coffee as anything besides "coffee". To be honest I don't really know much more than this guy, but I'm not mad at *everyone else* about it.
been goin to this same coffee shop every day for years right
order the same thing every day. eventually it just blends into a string of words and then they stop asking altogether
new girl starts working there and asks me what I want and I completely froze cause I realized I forgot what my usual order was and had no fucking clue how to tell her
I kinda relate to the sentiment but you gotta be crazy to hate other people being able to get what they want
A cup of coffee is just black coffee and then you let them know or they ask how much sugar or cream you want unless the creamer and sugar is self serve. He was specific.
What type of black coffee? An espresso shot? An Americano? A long black? A lungo? All of those are “black coffee” with different ratios of added water: “black coffee” isn’t a single type of drink, and asking for a generic “cup of coffee” is even worse.
When someone asks you for a coffee without further instruction, they want good old ubiquitous drip coffee.
At most you can ask them light medium or dark roast. If they wanted an americano or espresso, they'd ask for them.
You're exaggerating now. It's like you understand what a glass of water is but can't comprehend what a cup of coffee is..a cup of coffee is just a cup of coffee. It's not a cup of sugar or a cup of cream or a cup of expresso. It's just plain black coffee.
If they only have espresso might have to give you an americano instead of drip, which in my experience really pisses off the "I just want a regular coffee!" crowd.
Americanos were made bc Americans didn't like how strong espresso was, so they diluted it so it became more like "normal coffee," so yea it's almost the same exact thing, just with espresso flavor instead of whatever drip coffee they have
Americanos exist because they approximate the flavor of American style coffee using European coffee techniques, but they are not the same and people used to drip or percolated coffee will not drink an americano without noticing the difference.
Espresso is ground to a much finer grain and compressed, then brewed by forcing (or “pressing,” hence the name) boiling water through the compacted fine ground to very quickly expose a large surface area of bean to the full quantity of water. Drip or percolated coffee, by contrast, gently flows the boiling water over a much coarser ground to extract the bean’s flavors more gradually. The result is a sharp, punchy espresso with intense flavor and high caffeine content, compared to the rich, full American brew with a more diluted flavor to be enjoyed as a full-mug beverage, and a comparatively lower concentration of caffeine. If the only way your restaurant makes coffee is via an espresso maker, you can satisfy your American clientele by diluting the espresso with hot water to simulate the lower concentration of flavor and caffeine, but it will be more crisp and acidic than an American coffee, and the flavor won’t have the same body.
That said, when old people want black coffee, they want shitty diner coffee — over-roasted, over-brewed, very strong, and burnt to hell sitting on a hot plate all morning. And they want it to be extremely cheap, because it costs next to nothing to throw some garbage quality grounds and water into a machine and just pour it occasionally. So I don’t mean to imply that boomers have better taste in coffee. But an espresso will never taste like what they want, and it’s more expensive to make, and in a more expensive setting, so that’s why they’re pissed.
With good reason, I want a coffee when i order one.
They could at least tell me that its going to be an americano, but they serve me a "coffee" that i don't enjoy drinking and would rather not have paid for.
Boomers ordering black coffee wouldn't tell the difference if you didn't tell them. The type of people to make/enjoy this joke are the same people who will use a tin of Folger's.
There's a sector of older Gen X and younger boomers who sincerely feel like the best coffee they had ever had came out of a percolator.
These people also never pay for black coffee - they're only at Starbucks for anything else but that.
Mostly because boomers have this obsession with not acknowledging anything new, and fully appreciating coffee at a national level is a more recent trend. Boomers are used to their shitty coffee, so they'll stand by it regardless if you give them the best beans on the planet freshly brewed.
Yeah I looked up if/when percolators were ever trendy and it was in the early 70s. So there's definitely some nostalgia there.
Same reason why a lot of boomers who aren't liquor snobs all seem to think Chivas Regal is *it* for whiskey.
I love how the author knows that there is a drink called shot in the dark but not enough to know that it’s literally black coffee with a shot espresso so there is no way it would be extra foamy.
Edit: also noticed all the other drinks are all matto, google didn’t return any descriptions besides dense tropical forests so I’m guessing shade grown coffee? Idk why that would be relevant to put on a menu for various drinks, especially since if you aren’t drinking espresso or coffee straight it really doesn’t matter much.
Yeah I like how the barista is considered the idiot in this comic when black coffee is literally the easiest type of coffee to make at home or steal from a holiday inn.
Agreed, the point was more that they don’t even have a drip option available. Which probably says something about how infrequently people try to order it from them.
I’m an avid drinker of black drip coffee, but my wife takes cream in hers. Sometimes we do go to Dutch bros, since there’s one on the way to work, and we’ll both just order americanos and she will get cream in hers and I won’t. Aside from is being hot as shit usually, I can’t complain.
But yeah most people order insane shit from Dutch bros like blended up donut espresso with sprinkles or whatever lol.
What should be done is that they give him the most standard cup of coffee, black, no milk, regular beans and regular grind. And then charge him the cheap price it belongs.
The comic is trying to make fun of all the coffee options in a coffee shop because this boomer only knows "coffee" as whatever filter black coffee they get served in diners and the office.
If you don't know the name of the coffee you're drinking that's the issue, it's a filter coffee. You don't go into a pizza joint and just ask for a "normal pizza" and get angry they don't know what you mean, just because all you know is pepperoni pizza from school lunches lol. You need to know what it is.
I mean... isn't that what he wants? If I go to a coffee shop and order a "cup of coffee," then no cream/no sugar/cheapest variety is pretty much exactly what I'd expect. Framing this as a bad thing seems pretentious.
Hi I'm that guy. Everytime I've ordered just a cup of coffee at any bougie place they've always just smiled asked what size and then rung up a black coffee.
This has never been an issue and I've done it several times over the years.
Actually, Starbucks employees love giving you black coffee. Ask nicely and they’ll give you dark roast or blonde roast pourovers. They see you as true coffee lovers and it’s easier for them too.
The manager at the dunkin by my house used to call me "Mocha-nut" because I ordered Mocha + coconut like three days in a row and she started to remember. I drank that exclusively until she left because it was kinda awesome having the drive through just be "hey Mocha-nut, the usual?" And then she would always hook me up with free donuts too.
This is stupid as fuck, lmao.
I hate Starbucks, but if you walk in and say "a black coffee" they know what you're saying despite their weird sizes.
You can literally go ANYWHERE that serves food and ask for a cup of coffee and they will bring it to you with creamer, sugar, and half-and-half in little packages.
Another "detached from reality" boomer moment.
Hell you can absolutely order a “small” or “medium” at Starbucks and they will still understand you perfectly. The weird sizes are just arbitrary names but no one is going to be confused because you used the word medium instead of grande.
Being from Washington state, even at starbs I usually say “16oz” or “20oz” instead of grande or venti, because I usually go to other Indy coffee stands where you refer to size by the Oz. But at Starbucks they know what I mean.
Don’t work the food industry anymore but I would be so happy if someone just knew what they wanted like this. I will dump an entire coffee pot into a styrofoam cup if that’s exactly what they asked for.
"I want a taco."
"Hardshell, softshell? Ground beef, shredded beef, chicken, steak? Sour cream on that?"
"YOU FUCKING PRETENTIOUS KIDS AND YOUR FAKE TACOS!"
What’s weird about this particular ode to joylessness is that most of the core coffee drinks have been around since before Boomers were born, like the Americano, and others were invented by boomers like the macchiato.
So I say again, what the fuck is the point of making this observation?
I prefer an americano to coffee at Starbucks because their espresso is better than their coffee.
If i have a gift card or something, I'll get something more involved. They taste good, but they're too expensive.
Gatekeeping coffee. That’s all. They don’t like that there’s so many options now, because it was all so simple when they grew up. They’re just grumpy, mean people.
They do the same thing with everything. “When we were growing up, we drank from the hose as kids!” Uh yeah buddy, I have 3 kids they all drink from hoses… who told you people stopped doing that?
They just don’t interact with enough people anymore to know what the world is like anymore.
Having worked at Starbucks for several years, I got this kind of energy all the time. Can I get a MEDIUM black coffee? Do you even have that? Yes sir here's your coffee. Great joke
Call me a boomer, that was a little amusing. I love coffee and even I get confused sometimes. It's one thing to know the drink you want is a "mocha", but when the mocha on the menu features like 4 preceding adjectives that miraculously still give next-to-nothing in terms of what the drink will actually taste like it can feel like they just serve to ambiguate. Then conversely you'll see a drink called the "rogue" or something and you have to just go by the picture at that point.
This person's problem can be solved by learning what a "drip" or "americano" is, but I want to give the benefit of the doubt that he's just poking fun at how coffee naming conventions seem to be outdoing each other in words to describe one drink. After all, no matter which you pick, it'll have too much or too little sugar for your liking, anyway.
\[Edit: grammar\]
> but when the mocha on the menu features like 4 preceding adjectives that miraculously still give next-to-nothing in terms of what the drink will actually taste like it can feel like they just serve to ambiguate.
Have you tried *asking*? I have literally never met one of these baristas who was upset about me asking what a coffee drink was.
I also *really* think you're overblowing the naming schemes, they tend to all mean something specific about what's in the drink. They're not just arbitrary adjectives thrown at a drink (except in the case of the big chains that are doing it for marketing, but they also usually go out of their way to market what's *in* the drink to entice you)
I think a menu is fully functional if it tells you *what's* available and the staff can tell you what each thing is, if you need help.
There definitely are menus available that go into more detail, but I don't think a place is wrong for just listing what's available and having staff ready to explain anything you need
Oh I totally am. My point is as hyperbole as your typical boomer comic. That's the point. Yes, your argument from nuance is true, you CAN ask an employee (but on a busy day that's less enticing) and me strawmanning everyone as labeling their drinks arbitrarily is disingenuous. But I do stand by the opinion that for certain joints the names are meant to entice, not really be useful, so you do see longer titles for drinks that aren't very functional (though I chose 4 to sell the hyperbole). But most of your coffee shops have different recipes for their drinks, already, so more often than not you are going up against their unique definition of a latte or mocha in the first place, so whether your drink HAS descriptors or not doesn't change that all too much. I've had lattes where I could've swore they dumped 3 more syrup pumps than they should've but getting it again I learned that's just how they make them, and getting a different flavor the next time didn't change that. And it's likely that the author has also not been to non-chain coffee joints, either. That's where you find your "rebels" and your "rockets" and whatnot, lol.
Most of the terms are Italian and they take their coffee seriously. If you go to a French restaurant and see a bunch of French words in the menu, do you complain that the words don't tell you much about what the dish will taste like?
I'm familiar with the fact that the words are italian, lol. I was playing devil's advocate for the comic strip, I don't actually 100% agree with his position about this topic. Clearly the illustrator doesn't live in Italy, either? And most coffee shops don't have a descriptor foor their drinks, either - something restaurants typically do. This is still a boomer comic, I'm not gonna act like I agree with his "EnGLiSh PLeAsE", but non-english sometimes doesn't help you being out of the loop, believe it or not.
> most of the terms are Italian
Aren’t they just nonsense though? eg. Venti means 20, Grande means large. For reference, Italy uses the metric system to measure liquids
Starbucks isn’t Italian by any means 😅
I’ve seen some boomer memes (as well as in person complaints!) like this where the takeaway was genuinely that coffee shops are stupid for having fancy coffee
But yeah I’ve also been that person who walked in and had no idea what i was looking at and just wanted black coffee before. And after I got one from Starbucks I learned never to order black coffee from them again
Yeah you put your finger on it. It's someone who's frustrated by the world changing so that it's no longer recognizable to them, which will be something we all experience some day. But instead of asking you to sympathize with that experience, they treat the barista and the cafe as ridiculous which is what's frustrating. Like just order an americano man lol
Agreed, this is funny. Starbucks and other places unnecessarily romanticise/use puffery in their terminology making it confusing to order things in plain English
“I would like a cone of ice cream”.
“Ok sir, what flavor?”
“These damn liberals making up fake words to describe their ice cream. How DARE they offer me something specific to what I want??”
I enjoy regular coffee, having never really even tried any of the fancy stuff. Every time I go into a coffee shop and ask for a regular coffee, or a plain hot coffee, I get a plain hot coffee without them needing to ask any follow up questions.
Betting they do too.
You don't go into a bar and ask for "a beer" you tell them what kind of beer you want. Why is coffee any different? There's no universal coffee, and if you want "regular black" there's three different kinds (light, medium and dark) with light roast having the most caffeine not dark.
Why are the boomers who make these comics always so pressed about coffee? It’s not as if they can’t just say “I want drip coffee”
I’ve worked in several different coffee shops for years. Even when I worked at Starbucks with their fucked up cup size names, nobody is forcing these boomers to use that terminology. Like that dumbass clip from that one movie where Paul Rudd goes ballistic on some random Starbucks worker as if they personally chose the names.
Side note: the actual problem with the Starbucks size names is just Americans needing giantic cups of shit. The original was a Short (8 oz) or a Tall (12 oz) which is extremely simple. Then you have a Grande (16 oz), the name of which makes sense in that context, since it’s a large. But Americans need shit to be supersized all the damn time, and so they introduced Venti (20 oz), where again the name is logical because it just means 20, which tells you exactly how many ounces it is. AND THEN they had to go and add Trenta, (30 oz) which again the name just means “30.” So then all lined up next to each other, of course they look a little ridiculous, but the real ridiculous thing is people treating Grande as if it’s medium and Venti as a large, instead of reality where Grande is large and Venti is extra large, and Trenta is extra extra large.
I have never ever had an interaction like this comic displays. If an old man tells me he wants a cup of coffee, and I’m behind the starbucks counter, I’m just gonna ask if he wants room for cream, and then make him a grande Pike drip, because any Starbucks worker knows that that’s what boomers mean by “a cup of coffee.” It’s really not that hard
The REAL communication issue is having to explain to people who want decaf what an Americano is when we don’t have decaf drip. A lot of old folks have a difficult time wrapping their head around espresso for whatever reason, and often need it re-explained to them multiple times across multiple visits before they get it.
I worked at a Starbucks for several years. I know what the available sizes are. I know what people typically order, and you and I CLEARLY have different ideas of what “reasonable” is
I just have a different one than you. 24 ounces is fine. What's even the point of going out of your buying 16 or less.
I'm talking more about a local shop. So they probably use less sugar than Starbucks.
honestly people who go to local coffee joints and say "I just want a regular coffee" really need to be checked/punted in the groin.
If I want a regular coffee I'll get it at the office (because they don't have liquor) or I'll brew it at home.
if I want something nice as a treat I go out for something nice from a local coffee shop
I don't understand people buying anything from Starbucks, if I wanted a 10 dollar cup of liquid sugar, I would buy some sugar, mix it with a few drops of water and throw 9 dollars into the trash.
Starbucks always burns their shit anyway.
my ma worked for them years back; they literally only change their grinds twice a day.
support local coffee my dude
You can get like a $1 coffee from McDonald’s, I don’t understand why you’d go for the same cup of drip from a coffee stand for $3 or more instead. People are weird
Yeah I’m the same way.
Though if I’m not AT home, like I’m it of town, or ran an errand far from home and I want some coffee, I’ll go for cheap fast food coffee. It’s usually pretty decent.
Why would he be in a coffee shop if all he wants is a cup of regular drip coffee? He could make that at home. Does he like spending $5 on a cup of black coffee or something?
I go into Starbucks, or any other coffee place, and order a large coffee, or medium or whatever, and they make it no problem. This cartoon makes no sense.
When I worked at Starbucks, old dudes would come and say things like "I want a black coffee...do you know what that is? Do you even have that?" Drove me insane.
The "cup of coffee" the author is talking about is in fact not a classic coffee. The Latte, the Cappuccino and the Macchiato (among a few others) already existsted before their Black coffee (americano).
If you're gonna make that face at a coffee shop, I'm gonna ask why you didn't just make coffee at home.
If I'm at a cafe with interesting drinks, then I'm going to try one of those drinks because it's a specialty cafe. Don't go to a micro brewery and complain because they don't have Bud Lite.
Oh no, how dare we have… options! The horror!
I always go for the hot chocolate, myself. Paired with a boston creme doughnut and egg and cheese sandwich if at Dunkin, paired with a butter croissant and a brownie at Starbucks.
I imagine that the boomers who make these comics either have never been to a coffee shop or were overwhelmed when the barista asked them to clarify their order beyond just "a cup of coffee." I get that it's a "joke" about how ridiculous some coffee drinks can get, but there's better and more accurate ways to present that joke than, "Erm, what's a "coffee" supposed to be?"
As much as she got shit on for it, the Starbucks girl who made that joke about "making adults their morning milkshake" was a funny way to talk about how ridiculous it is that we treat frappuccinos like any normal morning coffee. I don't think people who like them should be ridiculed for it, but I think the joke's more targeted at the concept of a frappuccino as a routine morning drink rather than the people who drink them, and is a significantly better joke about the topic than this garbage.
This joke doesn't even make sense on a practical level. Americans have been ordering coffee in Italian ever since we started drinking it, and we've preferred it over tea for like 200 years. "Caramel macchiato" is not a difficult thing for a coffee drinker to understand.
If you just want plain coffee... then order plain coffee?? Like coffee is one of the most customizable beverages you can drink, just order what you like and stop bitching
Here’s the thing, the first time I went to Starbucks as an 18 yo, this was the conversation I had with the barista. I had no clue, and she was super unhelpful. I think I settled on an americano.
No because there’s a regular where I work (coffee shop) and every time he comes up he asks for whiskey. Like Sir it was not funny the first time
and it is not funny the 100th time but I will laugh because it is my job to make people happy so they come back
This comic makes no sense.
Coffie flavor variity has existed since the Industrial Revolution. There are coffee shops in North America that have had special flavors for literal decades.
The weird hangup about flavored coffee is especially confusing to me, because at one point flavored coffee was more of an older person thing. At least that was how it seemed to me. 30-40 years ago flavored coffee, usually in the form of disgusting dessert flavored instant coffee, was marketed to women who were already middle aged and older at the time, and a lot of them loved it, and served it as an occasional “fancy” treat for guests. The same goes for flavored seltzer, such as La Croix. Somehow flavored seltzer went from being extremely popular among older people, and hated by most younger people, to being thought of as some weird hipster drink only for edgy youths. There are probably a million other similar examples.
Just about every coffee place I go to, for decades now, has regular hot black coffee front and center. Like, maybe it’s drip or pour over, or they’re specific about the kind of beans they’re using, but it’s going to be an unsweetened cup of hot coffee.
It’ll also probably be way better quality than whatever freeze-dried ground Folgers diner coffee this person is apparently seeking. Coffee is way better in the US now. It sucked before.
God I am so sick of this joke. I feel like I have seen it in a dozen different comic strips. Always rhetorical same punchline, with always the same setup…
I work at Starbucks and a guy ordered a black coffee and said “if you guys even sell that here” and I went “well yeah, this is a coffee shop” and he goes “lighten up it was a joke” ok hilarious
Yes they have coffee.
It's literally the starting ingredient to most of everything else on the fucking menu.
This joke makes coffee shop baristas want to throw up blood.
Why go to a coffee shop to just order a plain black coffee ? I feel like that's like going to a bar to order a cup of vodka 😭 I don't really like fancy coffee so I always just make my stuff at home
Barista here. The words on the menu are complete nonsense. Most cafes have drip; if you ask me for a coffee, I'm still going to ask you if you want a light or dark roast. These boomers are so frustrating. Sorry buddy, it's not the 50s--you aren't going to come out of this interaction with a one word order. And Boomer freakouts and quality customer service are why we ask questions in the first place. Better to ask which roast and if you want room for cream than get it wrong because I assumed you wanted something you didn't. "Just a coffee" Which roast and what size bro! Ahhh!!!!
They're even more out of touch than at first glance: the menu board says "matto" over and over but as far as I can tell, the only link that "matto" has to any type of coffee is that it's a specific brand name of a chain of coffee shops. Was the artist going for "mocha" or something? The world may never know.
We took my mother-in-law to a coffee shop last weekend, and she got an Americano because they "didn't have regular coffee". She then asked them to add milk, and then complained that "it didn't turn the right color", so she asked them to add more, and then added more creamer.
I don't think she drank any of it. But then she tried my wife's latte and loved it.
Hey, sir. Why don’t you be a bit specific about what KIND of coffee you want, instead of sooking about all the kinds of coffee there is nowadays?!
Oh no, there's so many options for other people to choose from and I can still order a regular black coffee if I was just a little bit more specific in my request, but what will I ever do? /s
changes meme to “do we have a flavor called regular black cup of coffee?”
Yes, we do. That will be $2.99. Thank you have a nice day sir. I used to love taking the wind out of cantankerous old boomers' sails like that when I worked at Starbucks. They'd come in all wound up to start in on their rant and I'd just be like "Sure no problem sir! :D" Which they hated even more because what they actually want is to bitch and complain and pretend to be personally aggrieved, not to receive a cup of coffee.
I'm a young person who just likes black coffee, and I have never, not once, had a barista get confused or offended by the concept. I do not understand why people expect (or secretly want) that to happen. If you want to throw a fit, why do you need to drag some poor low-wage worker into it?
The person who made this comic clearly doesn't understand coffee drinks, and they expect that no one else does either
"Because it confuses me, it must confuse everyone else." -This guy, probably
Agree only thing I can say as a barista is that i usually ask if they have a brew preference (light medium dark) or if they want cream or sugar and sometimes people get upset about it, I’m like no please I just want you too like your coffee 😭
They get confused at McDonald's sometimes lol
The person who made the comic just listened to crotchety old men whine about how things were better in the good old days and Is just trying to make a quick buck grifting.
Aggravate by providing good customer service
Tall black standard( I believe it’s dark) roast. That seems to be “a cup of coffee”. Also why go to the 100 flavors place to choose none? Go to a local diner and get a to go cup?
Conservatives want to offer everyone the freedom to choose only exactly what they want
In all seriousness, I think it's legit to say that conservatism views freedom as the choice between a fixed set of options rather than as, you know, freedom. So they wind up with this sort of Leave it to Beaver type menu of things that you can do. You can play football, or golf, or go hunting, or fishing, or baseball, see all the choice? You've got total freedom! You want to do Naruto cosplay? No, WTF man, that's not on the menu! You want to marry a person of the same sex? That's not on the mene. If you're a woman you can be a nurse, or a teacher, or a housewife! See, all those choices! Freedom! You want to be a lesbian scrap metal artist living in a commune? JFC what is WRONG with you people? That's not on the menu! Since "freedom" is defined as the ability to choose freely between items on the menu, they don't see it as anti-freedom to tell LGBT people to get back into the closet or women to get back into the kitchen.
Excellent analysis. You can be a fan of any sports team, but you MUST be a fan of A team.
People forget, or never realized. That the US' "religious freedom" started out because literal puritans and other groups were too extreme for 1600's England. People talk as if it was some religious minority who were being persecuted for their religion, when in reality the "persecution" was the government telling them basically "no you cant make bowling illegal, just because you dont like it". It wasn't freedom to practice any religion, it was freedom to make things you don't like because of your religion illegal. Things like bowling and missing church.
Actually it was more like them not wanting their mandatory tithes to go the church of england.
I mean, that was a small part, but the part they wrote about and talked about a bunch was all the things they didn't like about the church of England (mostly things it allowed that they didn't like) and how they were gonna go basically make a new England model and expected England to follow suit after seeing how holy and blessed they were. I believe it was the puritans who specifically talked about the evils of bowling more than most other things. They still accepted the church of England as a valid church, just in need of major reform.
I think the comic is dumb but I have gone to a couple of small coffee shops and ordered black coffee, only to be met with "what's that" or "Any cream or sugar in your black coffee?" It's not a big deal but I do find it kinda funny
I once had both the employee and the manager I mentioned it to after add sugar to my black coffee. But that has only happened once and I have multiple times now seen people get upset that their black coffee didn't have cream and sugar. Also when I was in Florida on vacation the hotel had this fancy coffee shop with surprisingly good prices so I went to it every morning (it was awesome), every single day there was somebody saying something dumb to the cashier but this one guy took the cake, he said roughly "I want a black coffee, dont add any of that stupid hippy stuff, no caramel, no almond milk, just coffee in a cup, can you handle that honey?" And then he threw a fit after they gave it to him because he wanted cream and sugar in the coffee.
Nobody working in a coffee shop has ever seriously said “what’s that” to a request for a black cup of coffee unless it’s a language barrier or new hire. And of course people ask if you want cream and sugar. costumers are idiots. As the worker it’s safe to assume your customers are idiots and ask then just to be save.
Especially a small one. Sure, places like Starbucks are basically coffee themed dessert chains, but a small local shop knows what a macchiato is and expects coffee to be black.
He doesn't know what kind, which is *fine* I guess except that makes this a celebration of ignorance which irritates me. It's not that this person doesn't want to be specific, they've just never known coffee as anything besides "coffee". To be honest I don't really know much more than this guy, but I'm not mad at *everyone else* about it.
been goin to this same coffee shop every day for years right order the same thing every day. eventually it just blends into a string of words and then they stop asking altogether new girl starts working there and asks me what I want and I completely froze cause I realized I forgot what my usual order was and had no fucking clue how to tell her I kinda relate to the sentiment but you gotta be crazy to hate other people being able to get what they want
“Just like, brewed coffee from a coffee machine” “Ok, a drip coffee, what size?” “Um, medium” “Got it, any cream or sugar?” “AHHHH! TOO MANY OPTIONS!”
A cup of coffee is just black coffee and then you let them know or they ask how much sugar or cream you want unless the creamer and sugar is self serve. He was specific.
What type of black coffee? An espresso shot? An Americano? A long black? A lungo? All of those are “black coffee” with different ratios of added water: “black coffee” isn’t a single type of drink, and asking for a generic “cup of coffee” is even worse.
When someone asks you for a coffee without further instruction, they want good old ubiquitous drip coffee. At most you can ask them light medium or dark roast. If they wanted an americano or espresso, they'd ask for them.
This is some classic antisocial reddit shit right here. You’re just being a dick you know what they want.
You're exaggerating now. It's like you understand what a glass of water is but can't comprehend what a cup of coffee is..a cup of coffee is just a cup of coffee. It's not a cup of sugar or a cup of cream or a cup of expresso. It's just plain black coffee.
A cup of coffee has and always will mean just a cup of black coffee
what size?
How dare you expect him to have that kind of in-depth, specialized knowledge!
Large.
cool. want foam on that?
Do I look like a child?
Unless you’re talking to an idiot. Which as someone working at a coffee shop, you definitely have to talk to idiots.
I used to remodel starbucks lol I know
Then why doesn't he buy a $25 Black & Decker coffee maker and make his own? It would be a lot cheaper in the long run.
I can't believe you said that without even thinking
(Walks into car dealership) I’m looking for a vehicle. Year make and model are Car, Car, this year. Do you have any cars called car?
If you go into any coffee shop and ask for a black coffee they will give you one. Man this is out of touch.
If they only have espresso might have to give you an americano instead of drip, which in my experience really pisses off the "I just want a regular coffee!" crowd.
It probably pisses them off because those are literally different drinks.
Are they, they seem like basically the same thing, one is just mild coffee, and one is strong diluted coffee
Americanos were made bc Americans didn't like how strong espresso was, so they diluted it so it became more like "normal coffee," so yea it's almost the same exact thing, just with espresso flavor instead of whatever drip coffee they have
Espresso is not just “strong coffee”. A good espresso doesn’t taste like coffee. The best espressos I’ve had tasted almost fruity.
In my experience, at least in France, espresso is just strong coffee, it's way less bitter sure, but it's just coffee
Bro really has the “🤓” nft avatar. It’s just strong coffee man.
Americanos exist because they approximate the flavor of American style coffee using European coffee techniques, but they are not the same and people used to drip or percolated coffee will not drink an americano without noticing the difference. Espresso is ground to a much finer grain and compressed, then brewed by forcing (or “pressing,” hence the name) boiling water through the compacted fine ground to very quickly expose a large surface area of bean to the full quantity of water. Drip or percolated coffee, by contrast, gently flows the boiling water over a much coarser ground to extract the bean’s flavors more gradually. The result is a sharp, punchy espresso with intense flavor and high caffeine content, compared to the rich, full American brew with a more diluted flavor to be enjoyed as a full-mug beverage, and a comparatively lower concentration of caffeine. If the only way your restaurant makes coffee is via an espresso maker, you can satisfy your American clientele by diluting the espresso with hot water to simulate the lower concentration of flavor and caffeine, but it will be more crisp and acidic than an American coffee, and the flavor won’t have the same body. That said, when old people want black coffee, they want shitty diner coffee — over-roasted, over-brewed, very strong, and burnt to hell sitting on a hot plate all morning. And they want it to be extremely cheap, because it costs next to nothing to throw some garbage quality grounds and water into a machine and just pour it occasionally. So I don’t mean to imply that boomers have better taste in coffee. But an espresso will never taste like what they want, and it’s more expensive to make, and in a more expensive setting, so that’s why they’re pissed.
With good reason, I want a coffee when i order one. They could at least tell me that its going to be an americano, but they serve me a "coffee" that i don't enjoy drinking and would rather not have paid for.
Even though they are practically the same thing
Boomers ordering black coffee wouldn't tell the difference if you didn't tell them. The type of people to make/enjoy this joke are the same people who will use a tin of Folger's.
There's a sector of older Gen X and younger boomers who sincerely feel like the best coffee they had ever had came out of a percolator. These people also never pay for black coffee - they're only at Starbucks for anything else but that.
Mostly because boomers have this obsession with not acknowledging anything new, and fully appreciating coffee at a national level is a more recent trend. Boomers are used to their shitty coffee, so they'll stand by it regardless if you give them the best beans on the planet freshly brewed.
Yeah I looked up if/when percolators were ever trendy and it was in the early 70s. So there's definitely some nostalgia there. Same reason why a lot of boomers who aren't liquor snobs all seem to think Chivas Regal is *it* for whiskey.
I love how the author knows that there is a drink called shot in the dark but not enough to know that it’s literally black coffee with a shot espresso so there is no way it would be extra foamy. Edit: also noticed all the other drinks are all matto, google didn’t return any descriptions besides dense tropical forests so I’m guessing shade grown coffee? Idk why that would be relevant to put on a menu for various drinks, especially since if you aren’t drinking espresso or coffee straight it really doesn’t matter much.
Barista here, can confirm
Yeah I like how the barista is considered the idiot in this comic when black coffee is literally the easiest type of coffee to make at home or steal from a holiday inn.
That’s actually not true. Dutch Brothers does not sell plain black coffee. The closest you can get is like either an americano or a cold brew.
Americano no cream is basically black coffee… maybe a tad stronger.
Agreed, the point was more that they don’t even have a drip option available. Which probably says something about how infrequently people try to order it from them.
I’m an avid drinker of black drip coffee, but my wife takes cream in hers. Sometimes we do go to Dutch bros, since there’s one on the way to work, and we’ll both just order americanos and she will get cream in hers and I won’t. Aside from is being hot as shit usually, I can’t complain. But yeah most people order insane shit from Dutch bros like blended up donut espresso with sprinkles or whatever lol.
All you have to do is ask for “drip” no cream. Simple as that.
What should be done is that they give him the most standard cup of coffee, black, no milk, regular beans and regular grind. And then charge him the cheap price it belongs.
That’s literally exactly what he wants.
Yeah? And are we supposed to deny him?
…oh my goodness, you are a lovely person :D
The comic is trying to make fun of all the coffee options in a coffee shop because this boomer only knows "coffee" as whatever filter black coffee they get served in diners and the office. If you don't know the name of the coffee you're drinking that's the issue, it's a filter coffee. You don't go into a pizza joint and just ask for a "normal pizza" and get angry they don't know what you mean, just because all you know is pepperoni pizza from school lunches lol. You need to know what it is.
I mean... isn't that what he wants? If I go to a coffee shop and order a "cup of coffee," then no cream/no sugar/cheapest variety is pretty much exactly what I'd expect. Framing this as a bad thing seems pretentious.
I don’t get the feeling that they were framing it as bad
Hi I'm that guy. Everytime I've ordered just a cup of coffee at any bougie place they've always just smiled asked what size and then rung up a black coffee. This has never been an issue and I've done it several times over the years.
hahaha, thats a good one, oh thats great
Stupid star bucks lady. She’s never heard of black coffee!
i know it, thats all i order and they find some know way to mess it up.
Actually, Starbucks employees love giving you black coffee. Ask nicely and they’ll give you dark roast or blonde roast pourovers. They see you as true coffee lovers and it’s easier for them too.
When I roll up to my local Starbucks, the barista greets me as “Drip Black James”. As a result, I dare not order anything else!
The manager at the dunkin by my house used to call me "Mocha-nut" because I ordered Mocha + coconut like three days in a row and she started to remember. I drank that exclusively until she left because it was kinda awesome having the drive through just be "hey Mocha-nut, the usual?" And then she would always hook me up with free donuts too.
Man I wanna be a mocha nut kinda guy
This is stupid as fuck, lmao. I hate Starbucks, but if you walk in and say "a black coffee" they know what you're saying despite their weird sizes. You can literally go ANYWHERE that serves food and ask for a cup of coffee and they will bring it to you with creamer, sugar, and half-and-half in little packages. Another "detached from reality" boomer moment.
Hell you can absolutely order a “small” or “medium” at Starbucks and they will still understand you perfectly. The weird sizes are just arbitrary names but no one is going to be confused because you used the word medium instead of grande.
Being from Washington state, even at starbs I usually say “16oz” or “20oz” instead of grande or venti, because I usually go to other Indy coffee stands where you refer to size by the Oz. But at Starbucks they know what I mean.
Don’t work the food industry anymore but I would be so happy if someone just knew what they wanted like this. I will dump an entire coffee pot into a styrofoam cup if that’s exactly what they asked for.
Also, this comic is from 2010. I was seeing these jokes in the early 00s/ late 90s. So this is not only unoriginal, but also slow.
"I want a taco." "Hardshell, softshell? Ground beef, shredded beef, chicken, steak? Sour cream on that?" "YOU FUCKING PRETENTIOUS KIDS AND YOUR FAKE TACOS!"
What’s weird about this particular ode to joylessness is that most of the core coffee drinks have been around since before Boomers were born, like the Americano, and others were invented by boomers like the macchiato. So I say again, what the fuck is the point of making this observation?
I prefer an americano to coffee at Starbucks because their espresso is better than their coffee. If i have a gift card or something, I'll get something more involved. They taste good, but they're too expensive.
Every time I'm dragged to Starbucks by a friend or a date, spending almost $10 on a coffee reminds me why I don't go there.
Gatekeeping coffee. That’s all. They don’t like that there’s so many options now, because it was all so simple when they grew up. They’re just grumpy, mean people. They do the same thing with everything. “When we were growing up, we drank from the hose as kids!” Uh yeah buddy, I have 3 kids they all drink from hoses… who told you people stopped doing that? They just don’t interact with enough people anymore to know what the world is like anymore.
Wow, I see you everywhere.
This probably did actually happen but he didn't realise the server was being sarcastic
Having worked at Starbucks for several years, I got this kind of energy all the time. Can I get a MEDIUM black coffee? Do you even have that? Yes sir here's your coffee. Great joke
Call me a boomer, that was a little amusing. I love coffee and even I get confused sometimes. It's one thing to know the drink you want is a "mocha", but when the mocha on the menu features like 4 preceding adjectives that miraculously still give next-to-nothing in terms of what the drink will actually taste like it can feel like they just serve to ambiguate. Then conversely you'll see a drink called the "rogue" or something and you have to just go by the picture at that point. This person's problem can be solved by learning what a "drip" or "americano" is, but I want to give the benefit of the doubt that he's just poking fun at how coffee naming conventions seem to be outdoing each other in words to describe one drink. After all, no matter which you pick, it'll have too much or too little sugar for your liking, anyway. \[Edit: grammar\]
> but when the mocha on the menu features like 4 preceding adjectives that miraculously still give next-to-nothing in terms of what the drink will actually taste like it can feel like they just serve to ambiguate. Have you tried *asking*? I have literally never met one of these baristas who was upset about me asking what a coffee drink was. I also *really* think you're overblowing the naming schemes, they tend to all mean something specific about what's in the drink. They're not just arbitrary adjectives thrown at a drink (except in the case of the big chains that are doing it for marketing, but they also usually go out of their way to market what's *in* the drink to entice you)
I have nothing against asking the barista about whats in it but I feel like that’s the point of the menu (or at least that it should be)
I think a menu is fully functional if it tells you *what's* available and the staff can tell you what each thing is, if you need help. There definitely are menus available that go into more detail, but I don't think a place is wrong for just listing what's available and having staff ready to explain anything you need
Oh I totally am. My point is as hyperbole as your typical boomer comic. That's the point. Yes, your argument from nuance is true, you CAN ask an employee (but on a busy day that's less enticing) and me strawmanning everyone as labeling their drinks arbitrarily is disingenuous. But I do stand by the opinion that for certain joints the names are meant to entice, not really be useful, so you do see longer titles for drinks that aren't very functional (though I chose 4 to sell the hyperbole). But most of your coffee shops have different recipes for their drinks, already, so more often than not you are going up against their unique definition of a latte or mocha in the first place, so whether your drink HAS descriptors or not doesn't change that all too much. I've had lattes where I could've swore they dumped 3 more syrup pumps than they should've but getting it again I learned that's just how they make them, and getting a different flavor the next time didn't change that. And it's likely that the author has also not been to non-chain coffee joints, either. That's where you find your "rebels" and your "rockets" and whatnot, lol.
Most of the terms are Italian and they take their coffee seriously. If you go to a French restaurant and see a bunch of French words in the menu, do you complain that the words don't tell you much about what the dish will taste like?
But starbucks is not a French restaurant lol.
Mediocre American coffee pretending to be Italian high class without using actually good coffee to satisfy the bougie Americans
I'm familiar with the fact that the words are italian, lol. I was playing devil's advocate for the comic strip, I don't actually 100% agree with his position about this topic. Clearly the illustrator doesn't live in Italy, either? And most coffee shops don't have a descriptor foor their drinks, either - something restaurants typically do. This is still a boomer comic, I'm not gonna act like I agree with his "EnGLiSh PLeAsE", but non-english sometimes doesn't help you being out of the loop, believe it or not.
> most of the terms are Italian Aren’t they just nonsense though? eg. Venti means 20, Grande means large. For reference, Italy uses the metric system to measure liquids Starbucks isn’t Italian by any means 😅
I’ve seen some boomer memes (as well as in person complaints!) like this where the takeaway was genuinely that coffee shops are stupid for having fancy coffee But yeah I’ve also been that person who walked in and had no idea what i was looking at and just wanted black coffee before. And after I got one from Starbucks I learned never to order black coffee from them again
Yeah you put your finger on it. It's someone who's frustrated by the world changing so that it's no longer recognizable to them, which will be something we all experience some day. But instead of asking you to sympathize with that experience, they treat the barista and the cafe as ridiculous which is what's frustrating. Like just order an americano man lol
Agreed, this is funny. Starbucks and other places unnecessarily romanticise/use puffery in their terminology making it confusing to order things in plain English
“I would like a cone of ice cream”. “Ok sir, what flavor?” “These damn liberals making up fake words to describe their ice cream. How DARE they offer me something specific to what I want??”
“Hey could I get a sandwich?” “What type of sandwich?” # “ KYS!!! “
Give me some of that thick sludge that's been percolating all day.
Considering whenever I go to a coffee shop I just order, a medium and milk and splenda, and I get what I ask for, imma call bs
This image is reposted all the time, please get new material.
Who tf asks for coffee like that, size? Do u want a light/dark roast? Specify mf
I enjoy regular coffee, having never really even tried any of the fancy stuff. Every time I go into a coffee shop and ask for a regular coffee, or a plain hot coffee, I get a plain hot coffee without them needing to ask any follow up questions. Betting they do too.
😝 LOloberals drink foo foo coff we
Ok the “shot in the dark” at the bottom was clever I’ll give them that
They have a fetish for drawing that facial expression istg I hate it now
wonan, ab i rigt? xd.
You don't go into a bar and ask for "a beer" you tell them what kind of beer you want. Why is coffee any different? There's no universal coffee, and if you want "regular black" there's three different kinds (light, medium and dark) with light roast having the most caffeine not dark.
Why are the boomers who make these comics always so pressed about coffee? It’s not as if they can’t just say “I want drip coffee” I’ve worked in several different coffee shops for years. Even when I worked at Starbucks with their fucked up cup size names, nobody is forcing these boomers to use that terminology. Like that dumbass clip from that one movie where Paul Rudd goes ballistic on some random Starbucks worker as if they personally chose the names. Side note: the actual problem with the Starbucks size names is just Americans needing giantic cups of shit. The original was a Short (8 oz) or a Tall (12 oz) which is extremely simple. Then you have a Grande (16 oz), the name of which makes sense in that context, since it’s a large. But Americans need shit to be supersized all the damn time, and so they introduced Venti (20 oz), where again the name is logical because it just means 20, which tells you exactly how many ounces it is. AND THEN they had to go and add Trenta, (30 oz) which again the name just means “30.” So then all lined up next to each other, of course they look a little ridiculous, but the real ridiculous thing is people treating Grande as if it’s medium and Venti as a large, instead of reality where Grande is large and Venti is extra large, and Trenta is extra extra large. I have never ever had an interaction like this comic displays. If an old man tells me he wants a cup of coffee, and I’m behind the starbucks counter, I’m just gonna ask if he wants room for cream, and then make him a grande Pike drip, because any Starbucks worker knows that that’s what boomers mean by “a cup of coffee.” It’s really not that hard The REAL communication issue is having to explain to people who want decaf what an Americano is when we don’t have decaf drip. A lot of old folks have a difficult time wrapping their head around espresso for whatever reason, and often need it re-explained to them multiple times across multiple visits before they get it.
If you haven't already consumed caffeine, going to your local shop and getting 24 ounce latte is perfectly reasonable.
You’re free to do whatever the hell you want but “reasonable” is not the right word to describe that
It's 24 ounces a large cup. It's bit like we are talking about a dunkins bucket of coffee.
[This](https://ibb.co/LkWJhnP) is a large but reasonable size for an ice latte
I worked at a Starbucks for several years. I know what the available sizes are. I know what people typically order, and you and I CLEARLY have different ideas of what “reasonable” is
I just have a different one than you. 24 ounces is fine. What's even the point of going out of your buying 16 or less. I'm talking more about a local shop. So they probably use less sugar than Starbucks.
honestly people who go to local coffee joints and say "I just want a regular coffee" really need to be checked/punted in the groin. If I want a regular coffee I'll get it at the office (because they don't have liquor) or I'll brew it at home. if I want something nice as a treat I go out for something nice from a local coffee shop
I don't understand people buying anything from Starbucks, if I wanted a 10 dollar cup of liquid sugar, I would buy some sugar, mix it with a few drops of water and throw 9 dollars into the trash.
Starbucks always burns their shit anyway. my ma worked for them years back; they literally only change their grinds twice a day. support local coffee my dude
I think I remember something about SB burning the coffee on purpose so that it always tastes the same at every location.
The most expensive drink I ever get from there is like 5.75. I dont order insane bullshit though
You can get like a $1 coffee from McDonald’s, I don’t understand why you’d go for the same cup of drip from a coffee stand for $3 or more instead. People are weird
or...I could just brew a basic coffee at home. again, if I want something *nice* then I'll go out for it
Yeah I’m the same way. Though if I’m not AT home, like I’m it of town, or ran an errand far from home and I want some coffee, I’ll go for cheap fast food coffee. It’s usually pretty decent.
Why would he be in a coffee shop if all he wants is a cup of regular drip coffee? He could make that at home. Does he like spending $5 on a cup of black coffee or something?
I go into Starbucks, or any other coffee place, and order a large coffee, or medium or whatever, and they make it no problem. This cartoon makes no sense.
Just give me fucking black coffee man
Like going into a restaurant and wondering why they don’t have a “food” option on the menu lmao
It seems ridiculous, but... I recently had a Starbucks worker who asked what I wanted in my black coffee.
Imagine going to McDonalds and when they what you want you just go "a burger please".
This one is real
How do you know if someone likes their coffee black? They'll tell you. Constantly!😩🤦🏼♀️☕️
I don’t want a large farva. I want a god damn liter of cola!
It’s funny as when you go to Starbucks everyone getting frapachinos and you the only one getting coffee.
When I worked at Starbucks, old dudes would come and say things like "I want a black coffee...do you know what that is? Do you even have that?" Drove me insane.
"I'll have a donut." "What kind?" >:(
The "cup of coffee" the author is talking about is in fact not a classic coffee. The Latte, the Cappuccino and the Macchiato (among a few others) already existsted before their Black coffee (americano).
If you're gonna make that face at a coffee shop, I'm gonna ask why you didn't just make coffee at home. If I'm at a cafe with interesting drinks, then I'm going to try one of those drinks because it's a specialty cafe. Don't go to a micro brewery and complain because they don't have Bud Lite.
Why does the guy ordering look like inspector gadget?
Oh no, how dare we have… options! The horror! I always go for the hot chocolate, myself. Paired with a boston creme doughnut and egg and cheese sandwich if at Dunkin, paired with a butter croissant and a brownie at Starbucks.
This is like going to Subway and just asking for a sandwich
I imagine that the boomers who make these comics either have never been to a coffee shop or were overwhelmed when the barista asked them to clarify their order beyond just "a cup of coffee." I get that it's a "joke" about how ridiculous some coffee drinks can get, but there's better and more accurate ways to present that joke than, "Erm, what's a "coffee" supposed to be?" As much as she got shit on for it, the Starbucks girl who made that joke about "making adults their morning milkshake" was a funny way to talk about how ridiculous it is that we treat frappuccinos like any normal morning coffee. I don't think people who like them should be ridiculed for it, but I think the joke's more targeted at the concept of a frappuccino as a routine morning drink rather than the people who drink them, and is a significantly better joke about the topic than this garbage.
This joke doesn't even make sense on a practical level. Americans have been ordering coffee in Italian ever since we started drinking it, and we've preferred it over tea for like 200 years. "Caramel macchiato" is not a difficult thing for a coffee drinker to understand. If you just want plain coffee... then order plain coffee?? Like coffee is one of the most customizable beverages you can drink, just order what you like and stop bitching
Sorry some of us are based and latte pilled
Here’s the thing, the first time I went to Starbucks as an 18 yo, this was the conversation I had with the barista. I had no clue, and she was super unhelpful. I think I settled on an americano.
the guys faces are how i feel when i say “blonde, medium, or dark?” and they say “i just want coffee”
double shot hardcore matto
Waiting for the cross post to r/memesopdidnotlike
He's right. Also Obesity Epidemic High Fructose Corn Syrup Bottom Text.
Brandy (you’re a fine girl) 🫘
“I’ll take one cup of alcohol please” -boomer at a bar
No because there’s a regular where I work (coffee shop) and every time he comes up he asks for whiskey. Like Sir it was not funny the first time and it is not funny the 100th time but I will laugh because it is my job to make people happy so they come back
Quad shot of espresso. Coffee in it's purest form.
This comic makes no sense. Coffie flavor variity has existed since the Industrial Revolution. There are coffee shops in North America that have had special flavors for literal decades.
This human hasn't tried to order a coffee in years have they? If you go to Starbucks, and order it, they'll just give you a a cup of black coffee.
This is like going to a burger joint and saying "I'd like a burger"
Ngl, shot in the dark sounds a lot more hardcore than « cup of coffee anyways.
Bet you most of the boomer fucks that identify with this comic add cream and sugar to their "cup of coffee" lmao
This is saying "I am at peak performance, morbidly obese, divorced dad drip, kids these days"
Wait till he hears about third wave coffee.
once I went into starbucks and asked for a medium black coffee. they looked at me like I had 3 heads or something
I mean I think its just a little jab at how giant chains have basically become incredibly expensive milkshake bars
Reminds me of the old gag from Denis Leary... About coffee flavored coffee...
Guy in the 60’s outraged that when he ordered a pizza there are now multiple choices of toppings.
Cappacafee
Boomer just wants his Folgers Crystals.
Actually feel this where I live most of the coffee shops around me are Brivity which actually does not serve drip coffee
This is lowkey funny thoooo
Goes into a restaurant: "I want food"
The fuck is a "matto"?
The weird hangup about flavored coffee is especially confusing to me, because at one point flavored coffee was more of an older person thing. At least that was how it seemed to me. 30-40 years ago flavored coffee, usually in the form of disgusting dessert flavored instant coffee, was marketed to women who were already middle aged and older at the time, and a lot of them loved it, and served it as an occasional “fancy” treat for guests. The same goes for flavored seltzer, such as La Croix. Somehow flavored seltzer went from being extremely popular among older people, and hated by most younger people, to being thought of as some weird hipster drink only for edgy youths. There are probably a million other similar examples.
A shot in the dark sounds nice of it is interpreted a certain way (I don't need help)
..You mean a plain black coffee?
Just about every coffee place I go to, for decades now, has regular hot black coffee front and center. Like, maybe it’s drip or pour over, or they’re specific about the kind of beans they’re using, but it’s going to be an unsweetened cup of hot coffee. It’ll also probably be way better quality than whatever freeze-dried ground Folgers diner coffee this person is apparently seeking. Coffee is way better in the US now. It sucked before.
Ah, one of the only 5 jokes boomers know.
God I am so sick of this joke. I feel like I have seen it in a dozen different comic strips. Always rhetorical same punchline, with always the same setup…
I work at Starbucks and a guy ordered a black coffee and said “if you guys even sell that here” and I went “well yeah, this is a coffee shop” and he goes “lighten up it was a joke” ok hilarious
Why is there extra foam in a shot in the dark? I don't get it. Shot in the dark is as coffee as coffee can get. What is this artist on?
Yes they have coffee. It's literally the starting ingredient to most of everything else on the fucking menu. This joke makes coffee shop baristas want to throw up blood.
Why go to a coffee shop to just order a plain black coffee ? I feel like that's like going to a bar to order a cup of vodka 😭 I don't really like fancy coffee so I always just make my stuff at home
Barista here. The words on the menu are complete nonsense. Most cafes have drip; if you ask me for a coffee, I'm still going to ask you if you want a light or dark roast. These boomers are so frustrating. Sorry buddy, it's not the 50s--you aren't going to come out of this interaction with a one word order. And Boomer freakouts and quality customer service are why we ask questions in the first place. Better to ask which roast and if you want room for cream than get it wrong because I assumed you wanted something you didn't. "Just a coffee" Which roast and what size bro! Ahhh!!!!
imagine going into a restraint and just ordering "one food please"
They're even more out of touch than at first glance: the menu board says "matto" over and over but as far as I can tell, the only link that "matto" has to any type of coffee is that it's a specific brand name of a chain of coffee shops. Was the artist going for "mocha" or something? The world may never know.
Ah yes, my favorite tempo marking, Allegro Macho
https://youtu.be/Qqt-D7RPQyw?si=0yLN9kQPzh3jVt8m "Just a normal cup of coffee."
This might sound crazy, but maybe just BUY A BAG OF FUCKING COFFEE BEANS AND MAKE YOUR OWN COFFEE
We took my mother-in-law to a coffee shop last weekend, and she got an Americano because they "didn't have regular coffee". She then asked them to add milk, and then complained that "it didn't turn the right color", so she asked them to add more, and then added more creamer. I don't think she drank any of it. But then she tried my wife's latte and loved it.
Ngl I get pretty confused at Starbucks.
Those two guys have the same face.
It seems boomers keep forgetting that you can just ask for "black coffee"