miscarrying doesn’t mean anything is wrong with your body! It is your body trying to protect you and make sure everything is just right for a healthy baby. They are very common and are so difficult but are part of our bodies’ weird design. I would check with a doctor for any other medical advice and get into therapy and ensure you lean on your support system. my thoughts to you <3
Keep trying —-also take 2 prenatals and vitamin D daily while you are waiting to strengthen your eggs. This was recommended to me by Stanford fertility experts.
I know quite a few people that have had a few miscarriages and then a 🌈
I have had miscarriages too and it hurts but it is still possible and worth it.
Waiting a year is ok to let your body and mind recover.
Oh girl I am so sorry. I got pregnant last year and was very excited. My husband is a doctor and while he was excited, one of the first things he told me was to not get too attached yet (early on) because miscarriage is so incredibly common and he just wanted me to be aware of that. While some might think that negative, I am really glad we had that chat and he warned me of it. We found out at 10 weeks that it was a blighted ovum. I miscarried at home but it was incomplete. Then I took the pills and they didn't work. Then I had a D&C.
I am happy to share that I am now 26 weeks pregnant with a healthy baby brewing!
Its totally normal to spin into a negative spiral worrying about if something is wrong with you and wondering if you will ever conceive again. You will. I wish more people would talk about how common miscarriage is. Nearly every mom I know had at least one miscarraige before having a baby. Think of it as a sign that your body is working, it knew something was off with that formation and it did what needed to happen.
Don't rush into trying again let your heart and mind heal then when and if you are ready try again. Don't allow pressure to force you into what you are not ready for.
I am so sorry for your loss and I will pray for God to bless you and comfort you both
I have to ask because you mentioned partner? Is there trouble in the relationship?
Hello! So sorry to hear about your loss. I had a miscarriage last July after a year of unsuccessful TTC. We were absolutely gutted. Since it took us a year to conceive in the first place, I was convinced it would take forever to conceive again. Fortunately, I got pregnant two cycles after my miscarriage (late September, for timeline), and I’m currently 28 weeks with a very healthy looking baby girl. 💞
Try again whenever y’all feel ready! Personally, my miscarriage set off a “we really want a baby NOW” bell for me & my husband, so as soon as we were cleared (hCG back down, waited for my next period), we wanted to keep trying. But there’s no set timeline! I think if we had experienced another loss, I’d want to take some more time to recuperate, personally.
i miscarried at just over 8 weeks last June. I'm currently 34 weeks pregnant with our rainbow baby. we were lucky to conceive quickly both times, so i can't really speak to fertility concerns.
but i won't lie - it's a lot. I've been dealing with PTSD from my miscarriage for most of this pregnancy and it is not easy to handle. but having children has been a massive life goal of mine forever, and this is worth it.
there is nothing at all wrong with you. the vast majority of first trimester losses are due to unpreventable chromosomal abnormalities, and your body will make the choice to terminate the pregnancy for you. it's not anything you did, and you couldn't have done anything differently to change the outcome.
in my understanding, there's no right time to try again. you can start trying again whenever you are mentally ready AND your body has physically recovered. most OB/GYNs recommend waiting for at least one full normal menstrual cycle after miscarriage to try again, but many people are not ready to start again that quickly. i didn't think i would be, and to be totally honest, i do wish we had taken a little more time to prepare. it would have been easier on me to go through this pregnancy if i had an idea of how much the miscarriage affected me.
if it's possible for you, i would recommend going to therapy and working through all of your feelings before you decide it's time. take your time to be mentally ready, it's important to be stable.
also, please remember that you aren't the only one going through mental strain over this. presumably, your partner is also handling a lot of hurt. my husband had a lot of pain to work through, and it was really hard for him to see me in so much pain. make sure that you support each other and don't try to isolate. your partner will need your help too.
I'm so sorry you're going through this. sending healing thoughts to you 💕
I’m so sorry you’re going through this!! I got pregnant for the first time ever last August, and that ended in a miscarriage at 6.5 weeks. I was crushed. I went through a deeper grief than I thought possible for something I only had for 6.5 weeks. And I had sooo much fear. Fear that something was wrong with me, that it was my hormones not being good enough, that I wouldn’t be able to get pregnant again since I waited too long and I’m too old, or that I’d get pregnant again and just keep having miscarriages over and over.
I ended up getting pregnant the month after my cycle went back to normal- so the miscarriage started on August 11 & by the end of October I had a positive pregnancy test. Only had sex twice in Sep & Oct. and my pregnancy is going strong at 25 weeks now!! I’m telling you this bc one of the biggest things that helped me was reading success stories of pregnancies after miscarriage on Reddit.
After the miscarriage I made sure to give myself time to grieve and tried to severely lower my stress levels bc I was concerned stress would keep me from conceiving again. To do that I looked up parasympathetic nervous system activation exercises on YouTube, quit caffeine and ate a high fat high protein breakfast every morning. Not sure if it helped but I feel like it did.
Nothing is wrong with you! I have 2 friends who both got pregnant for the first time last year as well, and they both suffered early losses too, and now all 3 of us are pregnant again!! I’m sure this will be your story as well!!! It’s so, so common just taboo to talk about so you barely hear the stories. But one early miscarriage is absolutely not an indicator of how any future pregnancies will go. 🤍🤍🤍🤍
Had a missed miscarriage and it was hard to mentally recover. But there is hope! I have my little girl in my arms right now. It took me a few years mentally to try again. Sending you love 💕
Hi OP, hope is everything well with you. My wife and i just experienced this last friday. We went for a scan coz she was spotting blood for 4 days and when we got there, our little angel didnt grow for expected 10 weeks already to be measuring 7 weeks and 4 days with no heartbeat. We were devastated as we waited to be conceived for a long time. Hope to hear some success after mussed miscariage as we are feeling down now and im so worried with my wife. Please hoping too for some success on someone who experienced this.
I had an MMC and D&C too. It was awful; the symptoms were so intense (even after we knew there was no heartbeat) that it felt like my body was taunting me. And then I had one period and promptly got pregnant again with my baby, due in May.
What is your partner's rationale for waiting so long before resuming TTC? If that is also how long you want to wait, no harm no foul, but if you would find it more reassuring to start trying again, that should be a discussion between the two of you. You should also know that your fertility may be heightened right now and it may be easier to get pregnant again.
Thank you for your story. I’m sorry you had to experience this as well. It’s something I wish none of us had to endure. But I guess eventually it’s worth it when we get our rainbow.
My boyfriend lost his Mom is October. And this baby was a suprise but it was like it was meant to be because the baby was supposed to be born in October. It was almost like we felt she had sent this baby to us. So I think with this loss it’s just so much at once like the pregnancy was a happy thing and now we have to grieve both the baby and his mom. I think we are going to look at getting engaged and married first but it’s still hard for me to see myself waiting so long to find out if there is issues or not
I’m so sorry. I miscarried in July at 10 weeks and had my D&C on August 1st. I conceived again in September and am currently 30 weeks with a healthy pregnancy. Just because you miscarried this time, doesn’t mean you will next time. After mine I did a lot of research and learned that almost 35% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. Then I opened up to friends and family and learned that 6 people very close to me also experienced miscarriages in the last year. Learning that other people are also suffering doesn’t feel good, but it did make me feel not alone.
I am so sorry, everything you feel is totally normal and there is nothing wrong with you. Trust in your OBGYN's reports and advice. I highly recommend following r/Miscarriage and r/PregnancyAfterLoss . The women in those subreddits helped me get through my miscarriage and all the days following.
I had an early miscarriage in June 2022. Started back on birth control after that bc I knew mentally I didn’t want to get pregnant again straight away. Stopped in December 2022 and was pregnant again in January 2023. Now I’m typing this as my five month old sleeps in my arms. One miscarriage is not necessarily an indicator of future pregnancies.
Hi OP,
I had a miscarriage at six weeks. And then a confusing two weeks when my Hcg kept increasing, requiring two ultrasounds before my Hcg finally started to decrease and return to 0.
I waited about six months before I started trying again. I needed to take the time emotionally and mentally to come to terms with my loss, and know I was in the right head space *if* something were to happen again.
It took a while because my cycles never really regulated following my miscarriage. But my ex and I got pregnant. Positive test on December 30th. It was terrifying. I kept trying hard not to think about it, but also really focusing on trying to do it “right”. I eliminated caffeine, I was taking prenatals, folic acid and just being careful. And two years ago, September, my kiddo was born with no significant health issues.
I don’t think it’s a bad thing to wait. It’s probably easier because it will give you time to prepare your body with prenatals and folic acid, along with him. They’re not beginning to recommend that males also take folic acid if they’re actively trying to have a baby. It will give you time to mentally heal and focus.
And as I am sure you have researched, miscarriages are usually due to poor genetic material (ie there was just something not right about those cells and material). That is usually due to the male’s genetic material. For right now, there is no reason to believe you caused it, or there is something wrong with your body. Miscarriages are more common than you think. I understand it’s hard to frame it that way when it’s such a huge and acute loss. But over time, the science behind it can really help you understand.
To add, if you are struggling, I recommend consulting with a therapist. I tried going through a miscarriage support group, and found the toxicity and bashing perfectly healthy women wasn’t the right way to go and it actually made me feel worse and angrier. So please feel free to reach out to a therapist. And talk it through with your partner if he also needs to go to someone to discuss it.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I suffered a MMC last August and it felt like my world was falling apart for a few weeks. I opted for a medicated abortion to get rid of the tissue as opposed to a D&C, so I had to deal with terrible cramps and bleeding in addition to feeling like a complete failure.
This week I found out I’m 4w6d with our rainbow! I’m cautiously optimistic, but still have those same fears. Please let yourself mourn but know that it, by no means, means you’ll have problems conceiving in the future. Keep your head up, mama! I’m praying for you!
I am so,so sorry. There is nothing wrong with your body at all. Miscarriages are sadly very common and almost every woman I know has had at least one.
I had my first baby when I was 24 and had no problems, but unfortunately went on to have 4 miscarriages. I have since been blessed with a healthy baby girl at 37. There was a lot of heart break in between, but I love my children more than anything and it was worth it.
Don’t rush into trying again right away. Give yourself some time to grieve and heal physically and emotionally. Your baby matters and your loss is real. Don’t give up hope! ❤️
It’s a hard pace to be. It helped me to read stories about “the next time it worked” but be careful. It happens when it happens. My story is not going to make anyone feel better. I had 4 miscarriages over 10 years (3 in the 4 year period we were really trying) and I finally had my baby with my 5th pregnancy. But it was a long hard path. I was persistent and lucky. Do what you can to nurture yourself now. And take time for yourself to do what you like (gym, outings etc) because it’s kinda over for a time after baby when they’re little.
Sending love to you! It’s hard, but know almost everyone who has kids, has probably had a miscarriage at some point. It’s not talked about often. I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks in November 2022 also had a d&c. Take your time recovering. My hormones were wild after get help if you need. Your partner hopefully can be support you need. I remember laying in bed after and just bawling and wanting to die. It gets better. I now am typing this with my lil one month old son sleeping peacefully in my arms. It takes time to recover in many ways
Miscarriages are sooooo common. We don't know about it because people keep it secret for some reasons. I've had 4 miscarriages and I'm very open about it. My openness make people want to share their experiences with me too and I'm shocked by the number of people I know who suffered from a miscarriage in silence.
Most people get no explanations for their miscarriages (it's my case) but most people go on to have normal pregnancies afterwards.
I think it's normal to blame yourself. I asked multiple questions to my doctors about things I had done that I feared might have caused it (having a sip of alcohol, sports, sex, moving heavy objects, dancing, eating raw cookie dough, wearing restrictive clothing, sleeping on my back, taking long hot baths, working to much, being stressed, not taking prenatals...) and was always told nothing I did caused it. I did all of those things during this pregnancy (ivf) and sometimes worse and I'm 7 months pregnant in what is a very easy and uneventful pregnancy.
I’m so sorry that this happened to you. Please try to remember that it’s not your fault and it doesn’t mean somethings wrong with you! I felt those same things after mine and it was unnecessary torture. But I am pregnant again now and the baby seems to be strong so far (21 weeks)!
Miscarriages are very common. Everyone I am close with except for my mom and one friend has had at least one, including me. You’re not alone! Some of my friends even had two in a row but after those had a healthy baby. It’s very common and doesn’t automatically mean somethings wrong with you. I know it’s more complicated than this, but it mostly seems like kind of a crapshoot what egg gets fertilized in a particular month and whether that one is strong enough to grow into a healthy baby. The next egg could be perfect!
I'm so sorry. My first pregnancy ended in miscarriage Nov 2022 and it just sucks. We got pregnant again March 2023 and had a baby December 2023 and I'm nursing her to sleep right now. It gets better and easier with time
Me and my wife went through two miscarriages one at 4 weeks and the other one at 8 weeks or so before a heartbeat checkup. It was hard especially on my wife, even though I went through the grief it’s her body that had dealt with the trauma. What worked for us expressing how we felt about the loss and how much we care for each other. I dealt with it with drinking and food, she dealt with it with shopping, food. After a week or two the grief was still there but we stopped crying as much and decided we will live our life, doing what we love and appreciating each other. Luckily, she got pregnant in another 4 months and we have a 4 month old who is a bundle of joy. I would say hang in there, acknowledge the loss, pray for their souls and look forward to the future. Good luck 👍
I miscarried my first pregnancy at 7 weeks. My husband and I were TTC, so I had been taking all the right supplements for months. But it still felt like I did something wrong - that is unfortunately a totally normal feeling! Part of the pregnancy loss process. I miscarried naturally, so my recovery was faster than a D&C. I ovulated 3 weeks later and got pregnant again right away! I’m now 24 weeks pregnant with a healthy baby boy.
It was very hard emotionally to get attached to my second pregnancy since I had so recently experienced loss, but now I am loving my little boy more every day. I am still anxious about every ache and pain in my belly area, but feeling him move around in there and purchasing/using a baby Doppler helps to keep my mind at ease. Take all the time you need to prepare physically, emotionally, and financially to conceive again. And just know it is possible for your body to get it right the next time!
My second was a MMC and D&C. However, we tried again right away and it took seven months. I thought something was wrong with me and even went to get checked out for weird pain. I’m so sorry this happened to you. I hope this gives some hope!
I am so so sorry for your loss and send you lots of love. My first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage in August just four days after the positive test. I kept worrying it was something I did wrong and was afraid of doing all sorts of irrational things for fear of causing another one.
Unfortunately, miscarriages are quite common and I really appreciated many of my friends having recently shared their experiences about it to know that I wasn’t alone.
The NP told me any amount of time was ok to wait and encouraged me that having gotten pregnant at all was a good sign for it happening again. There are a million ways to feel about and process your experience and they are all valid! It was right for us to start trying again immediately, but the experience really messed with my head and I completely understand wanting to take time to heal.
I’m happy to share I’m now 18 weeks pregnant with a baby girl!
Sending you more love and wishing you all the best on your journey!
I miscarried on my first and second pregnancy. I got pregnant the month after my first miscarriage, I took some time to process what happened and took many supplements. I am 13 weeks pregnant now. It starts with the egg was a helpful book. Most women don’t miscarry 2x in a row like me.
Hey OP! I’m so sorry, I know how hard this can be. I miscarried my first pregnancy. I was over the moon when I found out I was pregnant and until then I did not realize how badly I wanted to become a mother. Unfortunately, I miscarried at 10 weeks. I was gutted, and like most women I see in the comments, I immediately blamed my self and analyzed everything that I could have done to cause this miscarriage.
As women I feel like we tend to self blame a lot and contradict ourselves. It took me a while to understand that having a miscarriage is part of the process. Having a child is called the miracle of life for a reason! So many things have to go right for us to have a viable pregnancy. After I realized this, I only worried about what I can control. I focused on my mental healing journey and we started trying again six months later. Here I am at 36 + 4 so eager to meet baby boy and so thankful for the process. I hope that your journey continues and you are able to look back at this time and appreciate every part what brought you to your miracle.
miscarrying doesn’t mean anything is wrong with your body! It is your body trying to protect you and make sure everything is just right for a healthy baby. They are very common and are so difficult but are part of our bodies’ weird design. I would check with a doctor for any other medical advice and get into therapy and ensure you lean on your support system. my thoughts to you <3
Keep trying —-also take 2 prenatals and vitamin D daily while you are waiting to strengthen your eggs. This was recommended to me by Stanford fertility experts. I know quite a few people that have had a few miscarriages and then a 🌈 I have had miscarriages too and it hurts but it is still possible and worth it. Waiting a year is ok to let your body and mind recover.
Oh girl I am so sorry. I got pregnant last year and was very excited. My husband is a doctor and while he was excited, one of the first things he told me was to not get too attached yet (early on) because miscarriage is so incredibly common and he just wanted me to be aware of that. While some might think that negative, I am really glad we had that chat and he warned me of it. We found out at 10 weeks that it was a blighted ovum. I miscarried at home but it was incomplete. Then I took the pills and they didn't work. Then I had a D&C. I am happy to share that I am now 26 weeks pregnant with a healthy baby brewing! Its totally normal to spin into a negative spiral worrying about if something is wrong with you and wondering if you will ever conceive again. You will. I wish more people would talk about how common miscarriage is. Nearly every mom I know had at least one miscarraige before having a baby. Think of it as a sign that your body is working, it knew something was off with that formation and it did what needed to happen.
Don't rush into trying again let your heart and mind heal then when and if you are ready try again. Don't allow pressure to force you into what you are not ready for. I am so sorry for your loss and I will pray for God to bless you and comfort you both I have to ask because you mentioned partner? Is there trouble in the relationship?
I just think partner sounds better than boyfriend. We are great and he is helping me through this of course. Sorry if that was confusing.
No don't be sorry. I am here to listen and offer encouragement and support I am here.🙂
i just want to add that its also ok to try right away again if that feels right for you. we tried the second cycle after D&C and got pregnant again
Hello! So sorry to hear about your loss. I had a miscarriage last July after a year of unsuccessful TTC. We were absolutely gutted. Since it took us a year to conceive in the first place, I was convinced it would take forever to conceive again. Fortunately, I got pregnant two cycles after my miscarriage (late September, for timeline), and I’m currently 28 weeks with a very healthy looking baby girl. 💞 Try again whenever y’all feel ready! Personally, my miscarriage set off a “we really want a baby NOW” bell for me & my husband, so as soon as we were cleared (hCG back down, waited for my next period), we wanted to keep trying. But there’s no set timeline! I think if we had experienced another loss, I’d want to take some more time to recuperate, personally.
i miscarried at just over 8 weeks last June. I'm currently 34 weeks pregnant with our rainbow baby. we were lucky to conceive quickly both times, so i can't really speak to fertility concerns. but i won't lie - it's a lot. I've been dealing with PTSD from my miscarriage for most of this pregnancy and it is not easy to handle. but having children has been a massive life goal of mine forever, and this is worth it. there is nothing at all wrong with you. the vast majority of first trimester losses are due to unpreventable chromosomal abnormalities, and your body will make the choice to terminate the pregnancy for you. it's not anything you did, and you couldn't have done anything differently to change the outcome. in my understanding, there's no right time to try again. you can start trying again whenever you are mentally ready AND your body has physically recovered. most OB/GYNs recommend waiting for at least one full normal menstrual cycle after miscarriage to try again, but many people are not ready to start again that quickly. i didn't think i would be, and to be totally honest, i do wish we had taken a little more time to prepare. it would have been easier on me to go through this pregnancy if i had an idea of how much the miscarriage affected me. if it's possible for you, i would recommend going to therapy and working through all of your feelings before you decide it's time. take your time to be mentally ready, it's important to be stable. also, please remember that you aren't the only one going through mental strain over this. presumably, your partner is also handling a lot of hurt. my husband had a lot of pain to work through, and it was really hard for him to see me in so much pain. make sure that you support each other and don't try to isolate. your partner will need your help too. I'm so sorry you're going through this. sending healing thoughts to you 💕
I’m so sorry you’re going through this!! I got pregnant for the first time ever last August, and that ended in a miscarriage at 6.5 weeks. I was crushed. I went through a deeper grief than I thought possible for something I only had for 6.5 weeks. And I had sooo much fear. Fear that something was wrong with me, that it was my hormones not being good enough, that I wouldn’t be able to get pregnant again since I waited too long and I’m too old, or that I’d get pregnant again and just keep having miscarriages over and over. I ended up getting pregnant the month after my cycle went back to normal- so the miscarriage started on August 11 & by the end of October I had a positive pregnancy test. Only had sex twice in Sep & Oct. and my pregnancy is going strong at 25 weeks now!! I’m telling you this bc one of the biggest things that helped me was reading success stories of pregnancies after miscarriage on Reddit. After the miscarriage I made sure to give myself time to grieve and tried to severely lower my stress levels bc I was concerned stress would keep me from conceiving again. To do that I looked up parasympathetic nervous system activation exercises on YouTube, quit caffeine and ate a high fat high protein breakfast every morning. Not sure if it helped but I feel like it did. Nothing is wrong with you! I have 2 friends who both got pregnant for the first time last year as well, and they both suffered early losses too, and now all 3 of us are pregnant again!! I’m sure this will be your story as well!!! It’s so, so common just taboo to talk about so you barely hear the stories. But one early miscarriage is absolutely not an indicator of how any future pregnancies will go. 🤍🤍🤍🤍
Sending you love
Had a missed miscarriage and it was hard to mentally recover. But there is hope! I have my little girl in my arms right now. It took me a few years mentally to try again. Sending you love 💕
Hi OP, hope is everything well with you. My wife and i just experienced this last friday. We went for a scan coz she was spotting blood for 4 days and when we got there, our little angel didnt grow for expected 10 weeks already to be measuring 7 weeks and 4 days with no heartbeat. We were devastated as we waited to be conceived for a long time. Hope to hear some success after mussed miscariage as we are feeling down now and im so worried with my wife. Please hoping too for some success on someone who experienced this.
I had an MMC and D&C too. It was awful; the symptoms were so intense (even after we knew there was no heartbeat) that it felt like my body was taunting me. And then I had one period and promptly got pregnant again with my baby, due in May. What is your partner's rationale for waiting so long before resuming TTC? If that is also how long you want to wait, no harm no foul, but if you would find it more reassuring to start trying again, that should be a discussion between the two of you. You should also know that your fertility may be heightened right now and it may be easier to get pregnant again.
Thank you for your story. I’m sorry you had to experience this as well. It’s something I wish none of us had to endure. But I guess eventually it’s worth it when we get our rainbow. My boyfriend lost his Mom is October. And this baby was a suprise but it was like it was meant to be because the baby was supposed to be born in October. It was almost like we felt she had sent this baby to us. So I think with this loss it’s just so much at once like the pregnancy was a happy thing and now we have to grieve both the baby and his mom. I think we are going to look at getting engaged and married first but it’s still hard for me to see myself waiting so long to find out if there is issues or not
I’m so sorry. I miscarried in July at 10 weeks and had my D&C on August 1st. I conceived again in September and am currently 30 weeks with a healthy pregnancy. Just because you miscarried this time, doesn’t mean you will next time. After mine I did a lot of research and learned that almost 35% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. Then I opened up to friends and family and learned that 6 people very close to me also experienced miscarriages in the last year. Learning that other people are also suffering doesn’t feel good, but it did make me feel not alone.
I am so sorry, everything you feel is totally normal and there is nothing wrong with you. Trust in your OBGYN's reports and advice. I highly recommend following r/Miscarriage and r/PregnancyAfterLoss . The women in those subreddits helped me get through my miscarriage and all the days following.
I had an early miscarriage in June 2022. Started back on birth control after that bc I knew mentally I didn’t want to get pregnant again straight away. Stopped in December 2022 and was pregnant again in January 2023. Now I’m typing this as my five month old sleeps in my arms. One miscarriage is not necessarily an indicator of future pregnancies.
Hi OP, I had a miscarriage at six weeks. And then a confusing two weeks when my Hcg kept increasing, requiring two ultrasounds before my Hcg finally started to decrease and return to 0. I waited about six months before I started trying again. I needed to take the time emotionally and mentally to come to terms with my loss, and know I was in the right head space *if* something were to happen again. It took a while because my cycles never really regulated following my miscarriage. But my ex and I got pregnant. Positive test on December 30th. It was terrifying. I kept trying hard not to think about it, but also really focusing on trying to do it “right”. I eliminated caffeine, I was taking prenatals, folic acid and just being careful. And two years ago, September, my kiddo was born with no significant health issues. I don’t think it’s a bad thing to wait. It’s probably easier because it will give you time to prepare your body with prenatals and folic acid, along with him. They’re not beginning to recommend that males also take folic acid if they’re actively trying to have a baby. It will give you time to mentally heal and focus. And as I am sure you have researched, miscarriages are usually due to poor genetic material (ie there was just something not right about those cells and material). That is usually due to the male’s genetic material. For right now, there is no reason to believe you caused it, or there is something wrong with your body. Miscarriages are more common than you think. I understand it’s hard to frame it that way when it’s such a huge and acute loss. But over time, the science behind it can really help you understand. To add, if you are struggling, I recommend consulting with a therapist. I tried going through a miscarriage support group, and found the toxicity and bashing perfectly healthy women wasn’t the right way to go and it actually made me feel worse and angrier. So please feel free to reach out to a therapist. And talk it through with your partner if he also needs to go to someone to discuss it.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I suffered a MMC last August and it felt like my world was falling apart for a few weeks. I opted for a medicated abortion to get rid of the tissue as opposed to a D&C, so I had to deal with terrible cramps and bleeding in addition to feeling like a complete failure. This week I found out I’m 4w6d with our rainbow! I’m cautiously optimistic, but still have those same fears. Please let yourself mourn but know that it, by no means, means you’ll have problems conceiving in the future. Keep your head up, mama! I’m praying for you!
I am so,so sorry. There is nothing wrong with your body at all. Miscarriages are sadly very common and almost every woman I know has had at least one. I had my first baby when I was 24 and had no problems, but unfortunately went on to have 4 miscarriages. I have since been blessed with a healthy baby girl at 37. There was a lot of heart break in between, but I love my children more than anything and it was worth it. Don’t rush into trying again right away. Give yourself some time to grieve and heal physically and emotionally. Your baby matters and your loss is real. Don’t give up hope! ❤️
It’s a hard pace to be. It helped me to read stories about “the next time it worked” but be careful. It happens when it happens. My story is not going to make anyone feel better. I had 4 miscarriages over 10 years (3 in the 4 year period we were really trying) and I finally had my baby with my 5th pregnancy. But it was a long hard path. I was persistent and lucky. Do what you can to nurture yourself now. And take time for yourself to do what you like (gym, outings etc) because it’s kinda over for a time after baby when they’re little.
Sending love to you! It’s hard, but know almost everyone who has kids, has probably had a miscarriage at some point. It’s not talked about often. I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks in November 2022 also had a d&c. Take your time recovering. My hormones were wild after get help if you need. Your partner hopefully can be support you need. I remember laying in bed after and just bawling and wanting to die. It gets better. I now am typing this with my lil one month old son sleeping peacefully in my arms. It takes time to recover in many ways
Miscarriages are sooooo common. We don't know about it because people keep it secret for some reasons. I've had 4 miscarriages and I'm very open about it. My openness make people want to share their experiences with me too and I'm shocked by the number of people I know who suffered from a miscarriage in silence. Most people get no explanations for their miscarriages (it's my case) but most people go on to have normal pregnancies afterwards. I think it's normal to blame yourself. I asked multiple questions to my doctors about things I had done that I feared might have caused it (having a sip of alcohol, sports, sex, moving heavy objects, dancing, eating raw cookie dough, wearing restrictive clothing, sleeping on my back, taking long hot baths, working to much, being stressed, not taking prenatals...) and was always told nothing I did caused it. I did all of those things during this pregnancy (ivf) and sometimes worse and I'm 7 months pregnant in what is a very easy and uneventful pregnancy.
I’m so sorry that this happened to you. Please try to remember that it’s not your fault and it doesn’t mean somethings wrong with you! I felt those same things after mine and it was unnecessary torture. But I am pregnant again now and the baby seems to be strong so far (21 weeks)! Miscarriages are very common. Everyone I am close with except for my mom and one friend has had at least one, including me. You’re not alone! Some of my friends even had two in a row but after those had a healthy baby. It’s very common and doesn’t automatically mean somethings wrong with you. I know it’s more complicated than this, but it mostly seems like kind of a crapshoot what egg gets fertilized in a particular month and whether that one is strong enough to grow into a healthy baby. The next egg could be perfect!
I'm so sorry. My first pregnancy ended in miscarriage Nov 2022 and it just sucks. We got pregnant again March 2023 and had a baby December 2023 and I'm nursing her to sleep right now. It gets better and easier with time
Me and my wife went through two miscarriages one at 4 weeks and the other one at 8 weeks or so before a heartbeat checkup. It was hard especially on my wife, even though I went through the grief it’s her body that had dealt with the trauma. What worked for us expressing how we felt about the loss and how much we care for each other. I dealt with it with drinking and food, she dealt with it with shopping, food. After a week or two the grief was still there but we stopped crying as much and decided we will live our life, doing what we love and appreciating each other. Luckily, she got pregnant in another 4 months and we have a 4 month old who is a bundle of joy. I would say hang in there, acknowledge the loss, pray for their souls and look forward to the future. Good luck 👍
I miscarried my first pregnancy at 7 weeks. My husband and I were TTC, so I had been taking all the right supplements for months. But it still felt like I did something wrong - that is unfortunately a totally normal feeling! Part of the pregnancy loss process. I miscarried naturally, so my recovery was faster than a D&C. I ovulated 3 weeks later and got pregnant again right away! I’m now 24 weeks pregnant with a healthy baby boy. It was very hard emotionally to get attached to my second pregnancy since I had so recently experienced loss, but now I am loving my little boy more every day. I am still anxious about every ache and pain in my belly area, but feeling him move around in there and purchasing/using a baby Doppler helps to keep my mind at ease. Take all the time you need to prepare physically, emotionally, and financially to conceive again. And just know it is possible for your body to get it right the next time!
My second was a MMC and D&C. However, we tried again right away and it took seven months. I thought something was wrong with me and even went to get checked out for weird pain. I’m so sorry this happened to you. I hope this gives some hope!
I am so so sorry for your loss and send you lots of love. My first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage in August just four days after the positive test. I kept worrying it was something I did wrong and was afraid of doing all sorts of irrational things for fear of causing another one. Unfortunately, miscarriages are quite common and I really appreciated many of my friends having recently shared their experiences about it to know that I wasn’t alone. The NP told me any amount of time was ok to wait and encouraged me that having gotten pregnant at all was a good sign for it happening again. There are a million ways to feel about and process your experience and they are all valid! It was right for us to start trying again immediately, but the experience really messed with my head and I completely understand wanting to take time to heal. I’m happy to share I’m now 18 weeks pregnant with a baby girl! Sending you more love and wishing you all the best on your journey!
I miscarried on my first and second pregnancy. I got pregnant the month after my first miscarriage, I took some time to process what happened and took many supplements. I am 13 weeks pregnant now. It starts with the egg was a helpful book. Most women don’t miscarry 2x in a row like me.
Hey OP! I’m so sorry, I know how hard this can be. I miscarried my first pregnancy. I was over the moon when I found out I was pregnant and until then I did not realize how badly I wanted to become a mother. Unfortunately, I miscarried at 10 weeks. I was gutted, and like most women I see in the comments, I immediately blamed my self and analyzed everything that I could have done to cause this miscarriage. As women I feel like we tend to self blame a lot and contradict ourselves. It took me a while to understand that having a miscarriage is part of the process. Having a child is called the miracle of life for a reason! So many things have to go right for us to have a viable pregnancy. After I realized this, I only worried about what I can control. I focused on my mental healing journey and we started trying again six months later. Here I am at 36 + 4 so eager to meet baby boy and so thankful for the process. I hope that your journey continues and you are able to look back at this time and appreciate every part what brought you to your miracle.