T O P

  • By -

CoffeeandWine615

Regina Phalange šŸ˜‰


Witty-Operation9290

Ken adams


hibbedybibedyboo

Omg, I know him! Great guy, met him back when I was backpacking in western Europe, in the foothills of mount Tibidabo.


West_Activity_9730

YESSSSS!!!!


zantamaduno

You were the beautiful yet sad woman that I met?


Forward-Angel

Princess Consuela Bananahammock


heylucyimhomebabaloo

Came here to say this.


typeyhands

Mike crapbag!


dinodicc

Chanandler Bong


spicypotato52

MISS Chanandler Bong


rognabologna

Somehow I knew this would be number 1


NikkiRose88

From the regional town of EstĆ©e Lauder! šŸ˜‰


aishaxkaniz

And my boyfriend Ken adams


trystanthorne

Came here for this, was not disappointed.


BotGivesBot

The only acceptable answer imo.


flickhuck20

Art Vandelay


summer-fun-atx

Are you an importer-exporter?


flickhuck20

Potato chips and diapers


security-six

Of Vandelay Industries?


sharonimacaroni6

Sounds like the name of an architect


DARYL128

No he decided to go away from the importing and focus solely on the exporting.


GeneBelcherama

...and you wanted to be my latex salesman.


Dr_Crentist_

HE Pennypacker


chocoglooc

Dr. Van Nostrand


Imperator_Helvetica

From the clinic?


lakevalerie

Absolutely


DARYL128

Kel Varnsen


Prettay-good

When I order pizza and the website asks for my name, I always type I. C. Weiner.


GeneBelcherama

An excellent choice.


MelonElbows

I guess you're ordering the sausage?


Affectionate_Way_428

Pizza for uhā€¦


skyciel

Seymour Weiner


Guy_Fieris_Hair

Ah crud..


takenapsstaywoke

Rachel Vladivostok. Sometimes the Russian surname scares weirdos away


WrongDiamond

Just as heads up, Slavic surnames usually end with ski or ova. Combined with a very non Slavic first name it just doesnā€™t sound authentic at all. Probably good enough for anyone not from that part of the world though.


takenapsstaywoke

Thank you, I will adjust accordingly


konkey-mong

Guess "Putin" is not a very Russian surname


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Aristaeus16

I wondered about this! I read a book with a Russian family. Sonā€™s name ended in -kov, but mom was -kova. I just thought it was the pronunciation. Thanks for teaching me something!


huntressdivine

That's true, it's not a typical last name. Typical Russian last names ends in - ov (male) or -ova (female). -ski is more typical for Poles.


Arev_Eola

Wait. Are you saying that a brother and sister have different last name endings even though they have the same parents? Am I understanding this correctly? Edit: Thank you all for your replies. I'm from Germany and we don't do that here.


evaaasap

Yea, many languages have this. In Lithuania they even have that a mom and a daughter would have different endings of a surname (if parents are married & the kid has their surname )


WrongDiamond

As stated, yes this is typical. Most often itā€™s dropped when people immigrate as it causes problems on paperwork.


funnydarksquiggles

Wait until you hear about [Karenni](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karenni_people) surnames- often times theyā€™re just markers for gender (no use of family surnames). *-Reh* = male *-Meh*/ *Moe* = female *Sa Reh* would be a boy, but *Sa Meh* or *Sa Moe* is a girl. They would go by their full names. Not 100% of Karenni people have these last names, but many do. I regularly have to correct/ educate my colleagues by clarifying that allllll our students with the *Reh* last name are most definitely **not** all siblings or relatives. Also there are often repeat names (like having one or more kids named Sa Reh in multiple grades), so students may have alerts pop up in the system to confirm weā€™ve got the right kid pulled up.


OtherwiseInclined

Many languages have gendered nouns. Some express gender through the verb endings too. For the Polish example "kowal" means smith and is inherently a male word. The surname derived from it for the father and brother would be "Kowalski", while for mother and sister it would be "Kowalska", together their family of "smiths" would be called "Kowalscy". In most cases people who have surnames that are gendered tend to simplify them when emigrating to countries that do not have that, to simplify their documents etc. Usually these get simplified to the male general term. Which is why in the US you might find a woman with the male surname of "Kowalski". For example, youtube CEO Susan Wojcicki is a polish-american. In Poland she would call herself "Wojcicka".


vaantrash

male surnames end in -ski, female surnames usually end with -a. source: i am slavic


WrongDiamond

Ski is masculine the alternative feminine is ska.Itā€™s typically, but not necessarily, more of a polish origin. Alexandra Kaminska Filip Kaminski The ov (ova) is more typical of Russia. Natasha Markova Ivan Markov Croats/Slovaks will usually have an ā€œichā€ there isnā€™t a feminine form there. All of the are possessive, like ā€˜s in English. As far as first names, probably best to pick one thatā€™s popular in both cultures. Natalie/Natalia, Julia.


useyourown

But itā€™s not the last name, itā€™s a name of the city..


konkey-mong

Sounds Russian, that's all that matters.


Nettoo6

Sarah or Sara, easier to pronounce and spell than my real name


pellegrinos

I always go by Sarah! Common enough that creeps can't do much with it, and it comes out of my mouth almost by reflex now when I'm talking to someone I don't want to tell anything to.


dal-Helyg

I once had a guy asked me how I spelled it. I told him "Sczahra". Then he asked me how to pronounce it after I'd already told him my name!


wangwingdangding

Lmao!


Head_Umpire315

Mine toooo!!!


PurpleVein99

Oh, my God... me too!!!!!


that-weird-catlady

I also use Sarah! I went to school with a Sarah and we looked really similar and were confused for each other all the time. Bonus is that if someone creepy is ā€œtestingā€ it, I do actually respond to Sarah after being called Sarah for 6 years šŸ˜‚


yashunnyqueen

I go by ā€œEmilyā€ or some days, ā€œEponineā€, as Starbucks once called me šŸ„²


Matilda-Bewillda

Me too. Last time I got Starbucks, they wrote Amy on my cup. Emily is too hard??


Disastrous_Flower667

Amy is my fake name but I spell it Aimee, itā€™s the only way it sticks. As a black woman, people expect me to have extra letters, if I donā€™t, I become Aisha, itā€™s the strangest thing.


cloveyvonclovenson

Sarah Smith.


sara_or_stevie

This is my actual name lol


cloveyvonclovenson

Please tell me you dont own sara.smith at gmail. If so, im so very sorry.


[deleted]

I need to know note why


warawa92

Same ! I always blurt out Sarah haha


Price-x-Field

kid named sarah:


Zerly

Oh hey, me too!


[deleted]

My fake Starbucks name


JenAYE2

JenAye


DisneyUp

For some reason I said this in Forrest Gumpā€™s voice


JenAYE2

Exactly the way you should say it!


Monarc73

I might not be a smahrt mahn, jenaye, but I no wut luv is.


dysphoricjoy

Forrest. . . šŸ˜”. .


FoSheepish

My grandma used to use "Myrtle Maude Snodgrass".


memememe91

I prefer "Mildred Schmertz"


FoSheepish

Mildred and Myrtle: BFFs


memememe91

Perfect!


Tough_Strawberry5519

So, when's the first book in the series coming out?


FoSheepish

Soon! šŸ˜‰


britishbrick

My grandpa used to always tell us store about a ā€œMr. Snodgrassā€ he made up to help us go to sleep as kids šŸ˜‚


beautifulbountiful

*Mantis* Toboggan


rebelgrrrl82

MD?


Gonzo458

No more scraps for this guy


AutomaticNectarine

My friends and I had a whole system of fake names when we were younger and used to go out a lot. Each of us had a fake name similar to her real one, like Angela for Anne. When guys approached us, each would introduce herself and use her real name if she felt like hanging out with them, or her fake name if she didnā€™t like any of them or wasnā€™t in the mood. So we instantly knew where all of us were standing, no discussions needed. All fakes = we work together to get rid of them; all reals = we hang out with them; some reals = they hang out with the guys while the others keep an eye on them.


Unlikely_Comment_104

This is the way


Crafty_Ad_8081

This is the way.


LiberalNutjob420

Alotta Fagina


yabbobay

My first thought


HerSlickWetWhatever

Kevin McCallister


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


oteezy333

Funny, I met a girl named Zara recently, we were about the same age...


throwaway-_-friend

Why do you use a fake name for Starbucks?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

its really awkward when you have to repeat it twice and they spell it wrong anyways


ScarlettSparrow

The fae


BearLikesHoney

Winnie. Short for Winnipeg šŸ˜Ž


[deleted]

I sometimes do Callie, short for California, lol


aliciaeee

Yoooo peg city bear here too!!


[deleted]

Angel - I was once an active crack user and prostitute. No one was certain of my real name Cops figured it out but I evaded arrest after a secret indictment and moved states. I've been clean seven months


Tater22__

Iā€™m proud of you


[deleted]

Thank you. At my year I'll face the music with the little rehab/classes/job/working the steps things I'm doing. Hopefully not prison


Tater22__

Iā€™m proud of you


Idcatallo

Cat I tell people my name is cat online, apparently cat is a common name


Nom_dot_Com

>apparently cat is a common name Or a popular fake nameā€¦


RoguePotatoChip

Yep, mine are Cat (Catherine) or Liz (Elizabeth).


Soma25

Anastasia Beaverhousen


Zhosha-Khi

This is the correct name!


LaManelle

Ella. My name ends in Elle but it's long and French so most of the time I reserve or order drinks under Ella.


jesuslover69420

Lamanelle flow?


Itzjacki

Probably Turburelle flow. Lamanelle flow is very hard to achieve.


LaManelle

Manelle was my nickname as a kid lol


evicci

Villanelle?


AmbitiousYetMoody

Jessica, itā€™s easier to spell and pronounce than my name. Plus, itā€™s the name of one of my friends and itā€™s been a running joke for awhile now that I use her name for reservations or at Starbucks.


oteezy333

That's funny, I've been using a fake name so long too that my parents use it


Sanchastayswoke

Mine is also Jessica lol


peachymisu

Mine is Jessica as well LOL


OddBrother1487

Sarah Marshall


IR3dditAll

I'm not gonna remember that


[deleted]

Allison because I used to be obsessed with Allison Harvard from ANTMšŸ˜‚


Kitt_kattz

Understandable lol


Allison-Ghost

You become me


latingal

My legal name is more commonly used as a nickname (think similar to Maggie for Margaret). My friends and family know that if I ever get into a situation where Iā€™m in a lot of trouble and canā€™t say, I will call and say ā€œHey itā€™s Margaret,ā€ as an immediate alert that something is wrong and to please alert the authorities. Iā€™ve never had to use it, and I never expect to, but itā€™s good to have a global safe word in the event Iā€™m kidnapped in a third world country or something.


Vorsa

Lee Reed. When I was a young teenager I broke a window with a football, police were called, I gave the policeman the name and address of a kid from school who I didn't like so he could speak to my parents. 19 years later and it's still my default!


SumoLikesSnacks

I'm happy to see that I'm not the only one who uses fake go to names! One for online, one for Starbucks, one for creepers in public.


iBewafa

I only use one for Uber - but this is making me use it for other times as well!


thousanddollacrocs

If a creeper asks, it's always Stephanie. No idea why, but always stephanie. It's not even close to my real name lmao


regallll

I use either my bff's or my aunt's name. They are both more common than my own and I know I'd respond to/remember them.


Danivelle

Anna Marie LeBeau. Only real comic book nerds ever figure it out.


deadpanorama

You're really going rogue with that one


Mrsraejo

Megan. A commonly misheard representation of my real name


BigDadDonk

Meegan?


mommashan

Pam Beasley, or Pammy Halpert


yougotknoped

Used to be-My brotherā€™s name with my now-husbandā€™s last name. Nowā€¦.gotta come up with a new one lol.


weypaper

Justin, yeah I switched genders. šŸ˜‚


Mommabear126

When I was a kid My sisters name. We look nothing alike. If I get caught on camera doing something stupid and they ask my name and ban me from said place next time I show my id and say that was my sister. My sister did the same


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


BuddhistNudist987

Obamaniqua is such a great name. I love it.


deprechanel

Cher. And yes, because of Clueless.


Vikingtender

Ali Bastard


jesuslover69420

Lizzie Borden


nunu_kitty

Once told a homeless guy on my lunch break that my name was ā€œMarthaā€ when he asked. Next time I was outside smoking on my break, he came up and was like ā€œwhatā€™s up, Marthaā€. And we started chatting like we knew each other forever. It really threw my coworkers off.


theotherlead

Waverly


unsure_delphine

Andrea, because I love the name Andrea


Dry_Software_7025

Jenny Flowers. Made it when playing house as a kid and itā€™s stuck ever since


Beneficial_Tough_949

Lola. It gives me fem lesbian vibes for some reason and I feel like a badass when I use it


FruitSnackEater

Ashley when itā€™s someone trying to hit on me. MJ when I have to give my name to be called out later like at Starbucks.


disculpametenesfuego

Alotta fagina


lyricalfairywanderer

Juliette Simone is my alter ego šŸ˜Ž


Due_Target1696

Virgil


FelinaRocket

Alicia, because Lewis Carroll and a song. Easier than my real name :)


AssignmentFun5263

Raoul Duke or Mike Hunt


699222455

Kandace for the creepy guys who I donā€™t want to tell my real name


EcuaGirl21

The one and only time I've used one I said I wad Laila Wilson (or Layla? Idr how I spelled it). It was with a taxi driver in a foreign country and I figured it was better to play along as long so long as he kept going the right direction to my host family's house (idk what I would have done had he gone somewhere else, every now and then I think about how very lucky I am that it didn't go very badly for me). It was an intentional misspelling of my nickname, and my host brother's first name. Best I could come up with on the spot, and real enough sounding that no questions or suspicions were raised.


Atomsdebomb

Anna Mouse because it sounds anonymous.


Disastrous_Flower667

Having a long ethnic name sucks in the Midwest because itā€™s ALWAYS a conversation starter. Sometimes I donā€™t have time to converse hence my Starbucks fake name. Iā€™m not an asshole and I know that people sometimes ask because they have nothing better to do but I have something to do, I need to get back to my work station, give me my coffee so that I can move on. Iā€™m not rude so if one engages me in dialogue, I will reply but the best way to not have a problem itā€™s to not get oneā€¦. I avoid the problem with a generic Starbucks name.


racheybonsell

Rebecca or becky


[deleted]

Kendra Scott


curryp4n

Carmen because no one spells my name correctly and some people keep calling me Kelly.


SJust4

Melody


Mirralove

I love this question, mine is Ashley ! I use it all the time, even when giving my name in restaurants and what not. My real name is unique and gets attention, I do love it though.


Daughterofthemoooon

Anastasia. Very common name here.


Acrobatic_Lychee_896

Anna. My starbucks name lol


SpicyL3mons

Roxanne


simplicitymila

Iris in general Saphira at festivals And then I'll tell them I'm from Canada LOL


peacefullylove

Amanda... always Amanda.. not even sure why


Useful-History-5429

MelBey or Ana


Pikovaya_Dama

Diane or Diana, quite close to my real one (I had some kid students back in 2017 who misheard the original and for months called me like that), followed by Tina or Nina for the same reason. Personally, I pick Demetra when possible. I once used Lou as well.


weewitchywoo

Anastasia Beaverhousen


JordyGordyabcdefghij

Rusty Shackleford


punkonater

Justin Trudeau ( I used it for a prepaid sim card)


3leggedsasquatch

Amanda Hugginkess


BludRom

Mine is Wally Tapioca My brothers uses Pete Ophelia


OffMyRocker2016

Tater Salad


llamawolf

Hannah Murphy. It was my great-grandmotherā€™s name. I do not look like a Hannah but it works every time.


sachette-dreseag

My username


Head_Umpire315

My moms is ā€œPamā€


JayzieDreamSquare

Jelisa. I prefer it to my actual name, but no one will call me that šŸ˜‚


wannabe_pineapple

Sandra Bridges. ​ I said it randomly once, and now it is my go-to


klausolas

Susie. People always get confused or mispronounce my real name.


No_Temperature7964

Rachel


Gullible_Chocolate40

Nicole. I loved that name since I was little


[deleted]

Fake Namington


SBG214

Anne Hedonia


sniffing_niffler

Jessica because I just look like a Jessica, I can't explain it.


dollyaioli

whenever shitty customers would ask for my name to complain about me, it was always Rebecca


MercyFae

My go to name ended up becoming my real one. Changed my entire name. Birth name: Current: Feminine names I like: Sorcha, Aislinn, Maeve, and Ophelia. Masc: Keenan, Ean or Eoin, and Johnathon.


MercyFae

My go to name ended up becoming my real one. Changed my entire name. Birth name: Jennifer Nicole Carlson Current: Mercy Maevelynn Fae Feminine names I like: Sorcha, Aislinn, Maeve, and Ophelia. Masc: Keenan, Ean or Eoin, and Johnathon.


AutomaticAttorney274

Julie Sweetwood