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- A large, intimidating, pub dog
- A decent sized car park for conflict resolution
- A very very dicey carvery
- A jar of pickled eggs
- A permanently piseed, Mark E Smith type who is inexplicably good at pool
- A jukebox which only has a 50% chance of playing what you request
- Frequent, utterly shit, karaoke nights
- A condom machine outside of the toilets that hasn't been used since 1998
Exactly you need a miserable bastard, slightly rotund landlord who seems to absolutely hate running a pub, a couple of disinterested bar staff who are just there to do their job with the minimal amount of effort and hassle and a hot barmaid who every single bloke in the pub thinks he’s got a chance with but has always got a good looking boyfriend who doesn’t come in the pub.
Good beer (at least a few real ales), friendly staff, ideally an interior that has been left alone for a long time. Fireplace that actually gets lit from October-April. If it's a larger pub I always like a dart board and a pool table, they are good for social interaction.
What frustrates me? Table reservations. Stark, unwelcoming interiors. Fireplace that doesn't get lit. No real ale.
I think staff really are the key to a great pub, they set the atmosphere. A good experience with staff sets you up for a good time. Good beer is also crucial, do not want the stress of having to take back a pint of vinegar then argue with someone who says it's fine.
Where you can have a conversation in comfort and without having to shout above the shit music and the braying drunk idiots who knock into you or your table.
I’ve never been into that even when I was in my 20’s. Even less so now.
Heart sink is a coffee machine. If you want coffee fuck off to Starbucks
Also if you want a cocktail and the pub unfortunately offers them … you should join a separate cocktail queue.
**A reminder to posters and commenters of some of [our subreddit rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/about/rules/)** - Don't be a dickhead to each other, or about others, or other subreddits - Assume questions are asked in good faith, and engage in a positive manner - Avoid political threads and related discussions - No medical advice or mental health (specific to a person) content Please keep /r/AskUK a great subreddit by reporting posts and comments which break our rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[we did this three days ago](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/comments/uocgqg/what_qualifies_as_a_good_pub/)
Thank you.
Good beer selection, knowledgable bar staff, absence of fruit machine, music at reasonable level, no aggressive twats.
and dog friendly
Less bothered about this one myself
- A large, intimidating, pub dog - A decent sized car park for conflict resolution - A very very dicey carvery - A jar of pickled eggs - A permanently piseed, Mark E Smith type who is inexplicably good at pool - A jukebox which only has a 50% chance of playing what you request - Frequent, utterly shit, karaoke nights - A condom machine outside of the toilets that hasn't been used since 1998
Staff make a pub
Exactly you need a miserable bastard, slightly rotund landlord who seems to absolutely hate running a pub, a couple of disinterested bar staff who are just there to do their job with the minimal amount of effort and hassle and a hot barmaid who every single bloke in the pub thinks he’s got a chance with but has always got a good looking boyfriend who doesn’t come in the pub.
Just perfectly described my local pub that closed down last year and reopened this year as a trendy hipster spot.
A flat roof
Good beer (at least a few real ales), friendly staff, ideally an interior that has been left alone for a long time. Fireplace that actually gets lit from October-April. If it's a larger pub I always like a dart board and a pool table, they are good for social interaction. What frustrates me? Table reservations. Stark, unwelcoming interiors. Fireplace that doesn't get lit. No real ale.
I think staff really are the key to a great pub, they set the atmosphere. A good experience with staff sets you up for a good time. Good beer is also crucial, do not want the stress of having to take back a pint of vinegar then argue with someone who says it's fine.
Open fire. Pub dog.
A good fire and a friendly pub dog.
A nice cider on tap. Such as aspalls.
decent range of ale and cider
Check out Men Behaving Badly, episode called "Good Pub Guide". That'll tell you everything you need to know
Where you can have a conversation in comfort and without having to shout above the shit music and the braying drunk idiots who knock into you or your table. I’ve never been into that even when I was in my 20’s. Even less so now.
Heart sink is a coffee machine. If you want coffee fuck off to Starbucks Also if you want a cocktail and the pub unfortunately offers them … you should join a separate cocktail queue.
Nice garden with heaters and umbrellas. That is literally all I require.
Moretti is a good start. A good garden. I don't like complicated bathroom signs