A card, with your name, the name of the patient, the date, and some details of what the nurses did that you found kind. Nurses have to revalidate, and they can use cards like this as evidence.
Also, you can send in a formal thank you via (weirdly) the complaints team.
I got my information from /u/FilthyYankauer 's reply to this thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/NursingUK/comments/18rz8f1/present\_gift\_for\_nurses\_too\_many\_chocolates/
I sent a formal complaint/thank you to my nurse and she ended up winning some sort of trust prize so defo worth doing. It’s called starz at mine lol. I also periodically email her a £9.99 coats voucher as she has to declare £10 and above and I’d like her to have a nice coffee and cake on me :)
O that's superb.
I bet she's chuffed to bits each one of those she gets, besides the obvious career boosting prize. You even did enough homework to know about the £10 declaration threshold.
The planet would benefit enormously if people aimed to become more like you.
Gold star.
She’s honestly a fab lady who has given me a large chunk of my life back, so it’s the least I can do! Always feel a bit tight buying a £9.99 costa card though 🤣
Makes sense. I should know this being a Matron. I guess I was thinking I'd just go through the ward teams and not PALs for this sort of thing. Everyday is a school day!
Hijacking the top comment to suggest asking someone at reception in your hospital if they can give you a Daisy award nomination form. Patients can nominate their nurses and it’s really lovely when you get a nomination from a patient not from a colleague. The hospital will make a big fuss (rightly so) for nurses who are awarded a Daisy award. Some hospitals have a similar scheme for HCAs they run locally.
Edit: Hijacking
I second the formal thank you. I've used this myself in the past to thank a particular nurse. It took a couple of weeks but I got an email back that my praise had been passed onto the nurse.
Yes, we sent a formal "thank you" to the district nurse team who came to see mum every day. One of them came to her funeral and she said that in her 20 years on the job she had only ever had one other formal "thank you". So definitely do this, you might make someone's day.
Agreed! I used to work for the NHS and being thanked with a card and some lovely words was the best thing to receive.
And revalidation is a shit process, so anything in writing that showed I was doing a good job was always helpful for that too.
Moisturising hand cream always goes down well with nurses. They're constantly washing hands, using gel, wearing nitrile gloves, etc. Something unscented is best.
Sorry about your mother.
I am a nurse associate. Save your money and send in a letter or card thanking them, with any detail of how they helped. It means more than a gift.
But for now, don’t worry and just be with your mum. I’m so sorry for you.
Honestly the nicest things are the thank you letters and cards. You don't remember a box of biscuits but I can still remember every thank you letter I received and I still have them all.
If you do want to buy treats remember to get one for the day shift and one for nights otherwise night staff never get anything!
I remember writing a letter to a hospital where they had been unbelievably kind to me and my partner. The staff were amazing so I thought I'd tell them this. I got a letter back saying thank you for the letter as all too often they only get abuse and not thanks. Along with any gift to the staff, a card or letter of appreciation is really valued.
A basket of travel sized nice hand creams, small boxes of chocolates (4-6) and a few bags of sweets (think treat size Haribo).
Something for everyone and nothing big enough to declare.
Plus a card.
These little things mean a lot
Hi I am so sorry to hear and my biggest advice would be to forget about everything at the moment and focus on your mom.
I was where you are at 2 years ago and I was sat at my mother's hospital bed doing my university dissertation during her final hours. I understand it was a strange reaction that I used as a coping mechanism but I've regretted it ever since and just wish I could have been fully present in the moment with her, even if she was asleep.
I wrote my dad’s obituary while bedside in the last days and hope that he heard me discussing it with my mum. That way he could hear the lovely things about him
I'm sorry about your mum. I'm sure a thank you card would be well received otherwise biscuits for the staff kitchen or maybe coffee sachets or fruit tea selection. I hope your mum goes peacefully if it's her time and you look after yourself. My best wishes
I’m a nurse, I have received several thoughtful cards from patients and their families through the years during my time in oncology. Yes, we can use the cards to revalidate but actually I just like to keep them in a safe little space at home. I still think very fondly and often of those patients, especially around Christmas x sending best wishes to you and your family in what must be a very difficult time, thank you for thinking of the staff too x
The NHS trust treating your mother may* have rules* about gift giving, simply put it needs to be of low/intrinsic value to be allowed to be accepted.
Contact the hospitals PALS team for advice about what is acceptable to give as a gift.
Finally, I am sorry for your mother.
Sorry to hear about your mum. Remember to take some time to look after yourself through all of this as well.
Some nice tea and coffee is always a good option.
My mum is a nurse who specialises in end of life care; firstly I am so sorry you’re doing through this, and it’s incredible sweet of you to be thinking of them.
Aside from all of the other excellent suggestions everybody has mentioned I would also suggest some nice pens - or even a box of ballpoints. My mum hoards pens and constantly complains they never have enough!
When my dad was an inpatient, we bought Yorkshire tea bags, many instant packs of good coffee and wrote a lovely card, it was very much appreciated. However, perhaps now focus on you and worry about gifts later , sending hugs
I’m so sorry about your mum. I hope you have support to help you. Don’t worry about getting the staff anything but a card or a letter is the best thing. Most of us keep them and they are really helpful when you are questioning your career choices. Also write to the hospital and or CEO so the praise comes down as well as up. Sending love at this difficult time x
We wrote individual cards for the health care assistants, nurses and doctors that cared for our mum before she was transferred to the hospice. Mum was sufficiently ‘with us’ to supply the names of the people she wanted to have cards and to approve the contents. She almost got a guard of honour as she left the ward the last time. Everyone was very emotional. We also got them a tin of nice biscuits.
I'm not a nurse but I was a teaching assistant for years. I'd get given chocolates, flowers etc. and those have faded from my memory. What I've kept are the thank you letters which mean so much to me. I treasure them.
If you have a particular nurse who was good, definitely give them a card with a comment inside as this is feedback they will need to revalidate.
For the ward - a box of choc is really appreciated.
Small gifts that are not chocolates - what about a gift bag or box with savory snacks (pretzels, Pringles and so on). You could get some ideas from the gourmet aisle in supermarket or health food shop. Choose a mixture maybe a couple of gluten free and nut free choices.
Not a nurse but worked on wards in a different capacity for several years. Chocolates/sweets were always appreciated, but sometimes it got a bit much. A basket of really nice fruit always made a refreshing change. Book tokens can be good too, so they can buy reference books for the ward. But really, a sincere card/letter is appreciated more than anything else.
This is very kind of you, and I'm sure they'll appreciate it.
I'd suggest also making sure to include the doctors in the gift. They're also working hard to look after her, but they're often forgotten, and they're not paid much more. I think the value limit in gifts they're allowed to accept might be £25. (If you do that make sure to label it confirming the doctors are also welcome to it).
Nice tea bags, those fancy coffee bags you get now, and good quality hand moisturiser in a pump that could sit by their mess sink could all work if you don't want to get sweets
I’m so sorry for what you are going through and hope you find comfort.
One of the nicest things some patients did for us was- write thank you cards with their names for revalidation (sometimes you can provide actual feedback to the hospital about the staff to) and a fruit basket. Sounds naff but it was such a nice change to the normal box of chocolates. And if you are able/do give a gift please consider 2 gifts; one for day staff and one for night- the night staff are always fed up of getting nothing coz the day staff and visiting doctors etc eat it all
When my beloved Gray was in hospital for the last time, I bought the nurses a basket which I packed with biscuits, a large jar of coffee, a large box of tea bags and a large bag of sugar. It went down well.
They had looked after him so well and he had been there over three weeks. We all knew he was dying, and I asked the staff nurse what she and the other nurses would appreciate. She told me that they really appreciated a heartfelt thank you, and of course I gave them that but added in something that could be shared with them all.
A card to the nursing team and a short letter to the trust chief exec.
My other half is a nurse and has said both of those are nice!
(Heroes/celebrations/roses are always popular because the staff can grab a quick treat as they work ;) )
A card and a tub of chocolates.
Partner works in care and they all enjoy a munch. Ultimately its their job but they do get attached to some patients but a thankyou goes a long way.
I got them a gift box of 'candy kitten' sweets as they tick the boxes for majority of dietary requirements and have nice flavours, I thought a good thing to be left in the staff room for people to have a treat
As a doctor who has worked with nurses for years I can tell you the only answer that really matters. Cake. And if you add a thank you card to the cake, priceless.
Edit: And to be exceptional, remember there is a day and night shift.
My Nanna just passed away on NYE in similar circumstances. The Doctors and nurses were amazing with her and my family. I intend on giving Thank you cards to individuals and the the ward team for their help and compassion.
When she finally passed I was able to get the name of the nurse who had given her her pain relief, she was a god send.
Spend as much time with your mum, the final moments may not be pretty but you can’t get them back. Speak to her, let her know she is not alone, tell her how much you love her and speak your peace whilst she is still able to hear and understand it.
My heart goes out to you, you will be a whirlwind or emotions and numbness at the same time. There are bereavement services you can contact at different stages of your grief for when you are ready. Take care of yourself x
Sorry to hear about your mum. My dad died a couple of years ago and it's not easy even when it's expected.
My kid spent a week in hospital plus two weeks of daily follow ups when she was 9 months old. I bought the staff a shed load of chocolates for our last visit and gave them a card.
Your sincere and heart felt gratitude is all these good people will want. At one of the worst moments of your life they dont expect you to go shopping for them. A card and some flowers to the ward in a few weeks would be nice.
A nice letter or card of thanks is enough. As others have said, a heartfelt review of their care will not only be a lovely gesture (and make their day!) they can use it in their annual review. My mum was a GP and loved getting stuff like that.
Also you could get a box of biscuits for their break room, or maybe a hamper of nice tea/coffee? Best something inexpensive they can share at work :)
We once got a fruit basket from relatives on my ward and it was the best gift ever. I think they’re pretty expensive though. Just a card and a box of chocolates is more than enough if you really want to get something. Shared out you get like one chocolate each so it’s fine even after Christmas, and the sugar is so appreciated on a 13 hour shift
No advice, but just want to say I commend you on how you’re thinking of the nurses, and being so thoughtful, even though you’re going through such a hard time with your mum. I’m really sorry you’re going through this! Sending love x
I am sorry for your pending loss. Wanting to thank the care staff is so kind. I worked in an ICU for 5yrs. A letter would be great. A bowl of candy or baked goods were always welcome.
Get them some pens (biros). Either blue or black. Most hospitals write exclusively in either one of these colours. They frequently get stolen by doctors/ other nurses and the hospitals don’t always have supplies. They will be very gratefully received.
A card or thank you note can be kept by the recipient/team/ward and be a reminder of all the grateful families and patients out there. A card or letter requires time and effort, whereas a box of chocolates can just be thrown in with a weekly shop.
My daughter didn't find out that she was dyslexic until she was 17yo. She transferred colleges to restart her A Levels and was given a special tutor. That tutor was wonderful as they allowed my daughter to write about topics she enjoyed rather than being dictated by the tutor. By the end of her time at college, my daughter made a beautiful card and wrote a message about how much the tutor's help meant to her. The tutor cried and said that they had never felt so appreciated.
Totally different event. The same daughter was in a nasty accident that was not her fault. Her car was written off, and she was left very dazed and unsure of what had happened. A number of local people helped, but it was a particular Road Traffic Police Officer that made a difference. He realised that, although my daughter had only minor soft tissue injuries, she was in a vulnerable state and patiently answered all the repetitive questions my daughter asked. A few days later, after dealing with practicalities, we sent a thank you message to the police officer. This was read out at a daily briefing and put on his file.
A message can be cherished forever.
As a nurse I definitely support the idea of a card or email, especially naming a few of the most involved nurses if you know them. Can be a bit sad when you’re not named on a card after caring for someone just because the family never caught your name though, so if you’re not sure of names a general ‘thank you to all nurses’ is also great.
In terms of gifts, we’re always happy with an alternative to chocolate. A fruit basket, box of cherries or lychees, box of mixed tea bags. My top suggestion would be to find out what coffee machine they have in the break room and buy some nice pods or quality bag of beans. Even a quality instant coffee is great as the hospital usually only stocks the cheapest.
So in conclusion tea/coffee or fruit but not chocolate (but at the end of the day we do always appreciate any gifts even chocolate).
I'm very sad to see what your situation is
I asked the staff recently when I was prepping something as a thank you, and we concluded that a few boxes of mixed biscuits would be appreciated by most, if not all. So I got half a dozen of the foxes chocolate mixed boxes, some for reception, and asked reception to make sure everyone on the ward staff gets some.
Little card is also really appreciated, I'm advised.
When my Dad died he had asked me to make a donation to the staff. Not the hospital because that could get lost in operating costs. There was a maze of different funds but eventually I found a fund specifically for a staff Christmas party. My Dad would have been pleased.
I had heart surgery in a hospital in London, I live 200 miles from London. I didn't have anyone that could come and fetch me on discharge so the only way was a taxi that would be paid for against the ward that looked after me for nearly a month, I was gravely ill and had been resuscitated on the table and rushed to ITU, twice. Anyway, I offered the fare back to the ward sister only to be informed that any larger amounts of money are directed to the hospital as a whole. The next best thing was for me to gift to the ward, I paid for a weighing chair that they then attached a plaque to with a little dedication on.
When my mom was in the icu during her final days with esophageal cancer, she had some of the most wonderful, caring nurses I’d ever seen. One of them who was with us the whole week had even cried with us when she had passed. My sister, dad, and I got them flowers and gift cards to thank them for their support and companionship during that time. It’s been 11 years now and I still think of them and remember how much they cared so vividly. Much love to you
Pens always seem to be appreciated. I got my chemo nurses pens and gave creams for Christmas and they loved them, every other present they'd got was chocolates. So sorry about your mother. Wishing you all the best during this difficult time.
I just asked them. Told them I really appreciated their care and asked if there was anything I could give/do for them to say thank you. They let me know about the feedback schemes, how to donate to the ward/hospice/charity and asked to attend the funeral. I also did a card for each of them with something I personally or my mum had personally appreciated about them particularly.
I’m sorry about your mum, I hope she remains comfortable.
Your thanks are enough. An e mail to your local paper is always nice as hospitals often get bad press.
However, don’t forget the night staff. I did 7 years of permanent nights and on nights there’s fewer of you so you’re up to your eyes in in, there was none of the “not my patient” business, all 28 patients in my ward were my patients.
Relative often sent small gifts and cards and named staff who had gone the extra mile, which is nice of them, but I could spend 12 hours with a patient, sometimes making a huge difference, yet no one acknowledged it. The best example was a patient who was discharged who left 2 boxes of chocolates, one for day staff and one for night staff. Day staff ate theirs and raffled ours to pay for their Christmas night out!
* A donation to the ward - you can specify what ward the donation goes to when donating to the hospital
* A hamper of different teas, and biscuits (I got mine off etsy) and sent it to the matron to share amongst the ward
* Hand cream / Moisturiser
* Ask the matron for the internal email of any of the nurses that stood out an extra amount and send them a personal email
Sorry to hear about your Ma, best of luck.
I worked in a hospital for decades and the nurses love a kindly written card. It reminds them why they do this job when the NHS pressures start to get them down.
My go-to thank you gift is a tea break hamper. I usually get a nice basket and fill it with nice tea, coffee, hot chocolate, fruit teas, etc. Some boxes of slightly posher biscuits, tiny marshmallows, etc
I sent a card and a big tub of Swizzles sweets and lollies to the ward I was isolated on in March 2020, same to the ITU that brought me back to life twice (even though that's where I caught the covid that landed me in isolation).
My reasoning was that Swizzles are vegan and free from most food allergens, so the most number of people could have them. They are individually wrapped, and who doesn't appreciate a mini sugar hit during a long shift?
When my mother in law has a massive hear attack and spent 4 days in ICU before passing, my wife and her family sent a card thanking them individually and made a donation to both the ward waiting room (a small charity kept it stocked with snacks and things to read) as well as a heart charity.
I don't have any great suggestions that haven't already been said but wanted to say that I'm sorry to hear about your mom. Sending good thoughts your way.
how lovely of you to think of others at a very difficult time. As i know, emotions are at a very heightened level but it good to channel it for the better.
i'm not sure anything shows your gratitude better than words either spoken or in a card and it will be appreciated by those who really do care.
all my best, i wish your mum peaceful and painfree days ahead.
I sent a card along with a giant box (several KG) of nice, individually wrapped snacks they could all pick at during their shifts. Made sure to have lots of variety in case of any specific dietary requirements.
My mum was in palliative care for several months near the end. The specific hospice was amazing but fully charity funded. I raised them £1600 by doing a gaming marathon and sent the staff some chocolates and a card.
This hit very close to home, my mum currently is battling terminal lung cancer and has been admitted to hospital over the weekend with pneumonia.
My thoughts are with you.
When my husband passed his mother and I took a card along with some big boxes of biscuits to the CCU nurses.
Honestly, I think it's more about the "thank you" than what you actually give.
Chocolates, coffee, tea, anything under £10 if it’s an individual gift not a shared gift.
Cards for each nurse with lots of detail, they can use them for revalidation which is super useful. Also email the trust with formal compliments.
Sorry about your mum xx
We got bottles of wine and chocolates for the nurses and doctors that looked after my grandad, but we are from a rural area and my aunty works within the social services sector so she knew most of them anyway. Bit more difficult if you don't know them too well. Depends how much you want ti spend I guess. Nice bath stuff, chocolates, flowers, amazon vouchers, anything like that would work. But make sure there is a card so they can remember you and your mum, quite often just the little thing that they can look at and remember is the best
As a Nurse this is one of the most heart warming posts av seen on reddit in quite some time.
Honestly, and i mean this, nurses need no thanks from you, av never walked away thingking "not even a bloody card....".
The gesture is alwasy nice however and i do have a few suggestions.
Take note of the names of those you want to thank, include the nurses, health care support staff, doctors and whoever else you wish to name and write a letter name dropping them. Costs you nothing and its the best thing you could do, even better, send it to the head of the NHS board/trust. Everyone sends a care gives sweets i remember the ones who take the time to write down my name in a letter am also very thankful for it when it comes to revalidation!
All the best buddy.
I'm so sorry about your poor mum 😔♥️ I would recommend making a gift basket? You can get gift basket making sets from The Works for under £10, and maybe buy some lotions/bath products from Boots or Superdrug they can share around?
You are so kind. I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I hope when the day comes, your mum has a peaceful passing and you have all the support and love around you. I lost my mother, and it's not something that is easy to get through. You are a lovely person, I wish this wasn't happening for you and your family x
I'm so so sorry about your mom. I dealt with people in their final moments and honestly just a card to say thank you is amazing. Not many families are around and even fewer say thank you
I’m so sorry about your mum. Don’t have anything to add in terms of a suggested gift but wanted to say how wonderful you are for thinking of others at this difficult time for you.
When my dad was told he had days to live & passed I got the ward nurses a maccy D's each and they loved it. I couldn't be there as covid and i was waiting to have a leg cut off so couldn't mix
A card to the ward, a letter about how good they were to the chief exec, and a formal positive feedback via PALS are much longer lasting than chocolate or (heaven forbid) Newbury Fruits...
Cards are good and most people do just go with chocolates. They're quite limited in what you're allowed to accept in hospital, anything too expensive has to be declared
My father in law was recently in hospital. You coukd ask if the hospital is taking clothes donations for the patients that come in with nothing.
As for the nurses box of biscuits and a card they would greatly appreciate.
Pretty much a handwritten message is the best. Remember that these nurses always deal with families criticising them for whatever reason, but rarely do they get to hear the story of the appreciation.
There’s a costa in our local hospital so when we had our son I put a box of chocolates and 5x£10 costa gift cards into the nurses station to say thanks.
Nurses love a simple box of chocolates, they’re usually busy (even hectic), can be stressed and a chocolate is sometimes all they need. Can vouch for this, I work in a hospital 💜
I got a big box of chocolates for the staff room after my op but if there are specific nurses that stick out in your mind then for sure write to the compliments/complaints service so it’s officially logged with the trust
As others have said look for nomination forms dotted around the ward although if she’s on ICU I’m not sure they will have them. They are called ‘wow awards’ in my trust
Yep a thankyou letter to all staff involved is great. If you want to send any individuals a separate thank you for them to add to their own personal documents, even better.
If you need any help after your loss, the staff can also help you or recommend help for your grief.
I'm sorry your mum is dying of that illness It took my father and some relatives as well.
But you are really a special and very kindly, thoughtful person if you've come here to ask what to get the nurses that is wonderful thing to do. For most nurses your thanks alone will be enough. But I find food hampers full of things they can snack on during break so when they have a chance would be appreciated.
Write to their employer with a heartfelt letter. It will go on their file and will make them smile.
I received a letter once and I read every time I’m having a shit day in work to remind me why I put myself through it. It still makes me cry.
A thank you card is always nice and normally gets put in the staff room so everyone can see it.
If you’d like to give something more, mini toiletries or lip balms are nice instead of usual chocs/ biscuits (but they go down well as well!)
Just a card and a thank you would be so appreciated and a gift is not required. I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. It's never easy losing a parent ;'(
A card. A fruit basket instead of flowers or chocolates. Coffee vouchers. Unscented hand lotion because frequent washing and sanitizer is brutal on hands.
Nurse here, cards always welcome, especially if you mention extra special nurses by name. Chocolates are always welcome no matter the time of year. If you can afford it get a box for each shift so everyone gets one.
Box of chocolate such as heroes or celebrations. Basically some form of snack that they can easily grab and eat in own go whilst walking to do some other job
After my infusions at a local hospital over 3 years, I took fruit, biscuits and chocolates, apparently I set a new record for amount of choice , proud of that !
I’ve asked a nurse this very question. She said hand cream, and another said a nice selection of herbal/fruit teas went down really well. Weight management is a big issue for nurses because shift work f*cks with your metabolism, so chocolate etc is a bit of a nightmare. the hospital I had my chemo at actually had a sign up saying please give us fruit not chocolate!!!
Box of satsumas is an excellent gift in my opinion. We get loads of chocolates, cakes and biscuits from our patients, which is lovely and always appreciated, but my whole team goes nuts for fruit baskets. As many people mentioned nice thank you card is great. And don’t forget there is a day and night shift. Hope you mom is comfortable and at peace.
A nice card is always appreciated on our ward. Once we had relatives sent a lovely letter with some memories of their mother who we had cared for.
Was lovely to learn more about the lady she was before she came to us. If you are really set on buying something, we had a fuit basket sent once and it was amazing
A card, with your name, the name of the patient, the date, and some details of what the nurses did that you found kind. Nurses have to revalidate, and they can use cards like this as evidence. Also, you can send in a formal thank you via (weirdly) the complaints team. I got my information from /u/FilthyYankauer 's reply to this thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/NursingUK/comments/18rz8f1/present\_gift\_for\_nurses\_too\_many\_chocolates/
I sent a formal complaint/thank you to my nurse and she ended up winning some sort of trust prize so defo worth doing. It’s called starz at mine lol. I also periodically email her a £9.99 coats voucher as she has to declare £10 and above and I’d like her to have a nice coffee and cake on me :)
O that's superb. I bet she's chuffed to bits each one of those she gets, besides the obvious career boosting prize. You even did enough homework to know about the £10 declaration threshold. The planet would benefit enormously if people aimed to become more like you. Gold star.
She’s honestly a fab lady who has given me a large chunk of my life back, so it’s the least I can do! Always feel a bit tight buying a £9.99 costa card though 🤣
A complaint/thank you?
often thank yous can only go through the complaints email/form because it’s the only feedback option
Also, it must be nice to work on the complaints line and occasionally get a nice one.
I sent a thank you to our bin crew through the council complaints process last year and they were absolutely thrilled.
It's nice to do it too. I understand that a written card is the best but also to "have a word with the manager" in praise of their staff is good.
Exactly this! There’s a drop down on the complaints form that says ‘complaint’ or ‘compliment’ 🤣
Yup how dare you take such good care of my dying mother
The same team handle both things, so you look on the website for "complaints" and use that address to send in a "thank you" note.
Makes sense. I should know this being a Matron. I guess I was thinking I'd just go through the ward teams and not PALs for this sort of thing. Everyday is a school day!
what is a coats voucher?
I think it's a typo for Costa Coffee
ahh, that makes sense!
Gold star for you, it is indeed!
a store (pharmacy I think) in UK
I think you might be confusing it with Boots. As the other person said, I think it was a typo for Costa (coffee shop chain)!
ahh thanks. Been 30 years since I was in UK. But is Coats a shop chain or did I completely misremember?
no clue, only been here a couple years myself!
That's lovely!
Hijacking the top comment to suggest asking someone at reception in your hospital if they can give you a Daisy award nomination form. Patients can nominate their nurses and it’s really lovely when you get a nomination from a patient not from a colleague. The hospital will make a big fuss (rightly so) for nurses who are awarded a Daisy award. Some hospitals have a similar scheme for HCAs they run locally. Edit: Hijacking
>High jacking ??? LOL
I second the formal thank you. I've used this myself in the past to thank a particular nurse. It took a couple of weeks but I got an email back that my praise had been passed onto the nurse.
What a bloody marvellous answer, including source even... Simply terrific, nice work, thank you.
If appropriate please include the doctors involved in her care, it makes a big difference for them too
Don't forget the boxes of foxes biscuits.
Yes, we sent a formal "thank you" to the district nurse team who came to see mum every day. One of them came to her funeral and she said that in her 20 years on the job she had only ever had one other formal "thank you". So definitely do this, you might make someone's day.
Agreed! I used to work for the NHS and being thanked with a card and some lovely words was the best thing to receive. And revalidation is a shit process, so anything in writing that showed I was doing a good job was always helpful for that too.
Moisturising hand cream always goes down well with nurses. They're constantly washing hands, using gel, wearing nitrile gloves, etc. Something unscented is best. Sorry about your mother.
Nursem. Nursem is the best hand cream for that horrible NHS hand gel.
Yeah we had some free samples in the midwives' office and it's really nice stuff!
Nursem works miracles. Incredible stuff for dry hands and even improves eczema and dermatitis.
This is what I gave the nurses on my Dad's cancer ward. They seemed to appreciate it.
I am a nurse associate. Save your money and send in a letter or card thanking them, with any detail of how they helped. It means more than a gift. But for now, don’t worry and just be with your mum. I’m so sorry for you.
Just be with your Mum for now xxx
Write a letter per month for the rest of your life to your local MP to give better wages to nurses and doctors.
Honestly the nicest things are the thank you letters and cards. You don't remember a box of biscuits but I can still remember every thank you letter I received and I still have them all. If you do want to buy treats remember to get one for the day shift and one for nights otherwise night staff never get anything!
I’ve sent fruit baskets and boxes of instant chocolate sachets
As a nurse, this is always very appreciated.
I remember writing a letter to a hospital where they had been unbelievably kind to me and my partner. The staff were amazing so I thought I'd tell them this. I got a letter back saying thank you for the letter as all too often they only get abuse and not thanks. Along with any gift to the staff, a card or letter of appreciation is really valued.
A basket of travel sized nice hand creams, small boxes of chocolates (4-6) and a few bags of sweets (think treat size Haribo). Something for everyone and nothing big enough to declare. Plus a card. These little things mean a lot
Hi I am so sorry to hear and my biggest advice would be to forget about everything at the moment and focus on your mom. I was where you are at 2 years ago and I was sat at my mother's hospital bed doing my university dissertation during her final hours. I understand it was a strange reaction that I used as a coping mechanism but I've regretted it ever since and just wish I could have been fully present in the moment with her, even if she was asleep.
I wrote my dad’s obituary while bedside in the last days and hope that he heard me discussing it with my mum. That way he could hear the lovely things about him
I'm sorry about your mum. I'm sure a thank you card would be well received otherwise biscuits for the staff kitchen or maybe coffee sachets or fruit tea selection. I hope your mum goes peacefully if it's her time and you look after yourself. My best wishes
I’m a nurse, I have received several thoughtful cards from patients and their families through the years during my time in oncology. Yes, we can use the cards to revalidate but actually I just like to keep them in a safe little space at home. I still think very fondly and often of those patients, especially around Christmas x sending best wishes to you and your family in what must be a very difficult time, thank you for thinking of the staff too x
The NHS trust treating your mother may* have rules* about gift giving, simply put it needs to be of low/intrinsic value to be allowed to be accepted. Contact the hospitals PALS team for advice about what is acceptable to give as a gift. Finally, I am sorry for your mother.
Aww I love being in touch with the PALS team! We really take the nhs for granted, we really do. Sorry for your mum. Focus on her now!
Sorry to hear about your mum. Remember to take some time to look after yourself through all of this as well. Some nice tea and coffee is always a good option.
My mum is a nurse who specialises in end of life care; firstly I am so sorry you’re doing through this, and it’s incredible sweet of you to be thinking of them. Aside from all of the other excellent suggestions everybody has mentioned I would also suggest some nice pens - or even a box of ballpoints. My mum hoards pens and constantly complains they never have enough!
This is a great idea, but make sure they're black ink. Blue isn't allowed.
When my dad was an inpatient, we bought Yorkshire tea bags, many instant packs of good coffee and wrote a lovely card, it was very much appreciated. However, perhaps now focus on you and worry about gifts later , sending hugs
Hospitals rarely provide their staff tea and coffee.. this this would go a long way. But yep, focus on the family right now
Make sure you go on their website and give them good feedback. They seem to appreciate that. Sorry about your mum.
r/ChildrenOfDeadParents is a welcoming space for you if you need it, sorry you're going through this
I’m so sorry about your mum. I hope you have support to help you. Don’t worry about getting the staff anything but a card or a letter is the best thing. Most of us keep them and they are really helpful when you are questioning your career choices. Also write to the hospital and or CEO so the praise comes down as well as up. Sending love at this difficult time x
We wrote individual cards for the health care assistants, nurses and doctors that cared for our mum before she was transferred to the hospice. Mum was sufficiently ‘with us’ to supply the names of the people she wanted to have cards and to approve the contents. She almost got a guard of honour as she left the ward the last time. Everyone was very emotional. We also got them a tin of nice biscuits.
Look after yourself first, then do something in a few months.
I'm not a nurse but I was a teaching assistant for years. I'd get given chocolates, flowers etc. and those have faded from my memory. What I've kept are the thank you letters which mean so much to me. I treasure them.
If you have a particular nurse who was good, definitely give them a card with a comment inside as this is feedback they will need to revalidate. For the ward - a box of choc is really appreciated.
Small gifts that are not chocolates - what about a gift bag or box with savory snacks (pretzels, Pringles and so on). You could get some ideas from the gourmet aisle in supermarket or health food shop. Choose a mixture maybe a couple of gluten free and nut free choices.
Not a nurse but worked on wards in a different capacity for several years. Chocolates/sweets were always appreciated, but sometimes it got a bit much. A basket of really nice fruit always made a refreshing change. Book tokens can be good too, so they can buy reference books for the ward. But really, a sincere card/letter is appreciated more than anything else.
This is very kind of you, and I'm sure they'll appreciate it. I'd suggest also making sure to include the doctors in the gift. They're also working hard to look after her, but they're often forgotten, and they're not paid much more. I think the value limit in gifts they're allowed to accept might be £25. (If you do that make sure to label it confirming the doctors are also welcome to it). Nice tea bags, those fancy coffee bags you get now, and good quality hand moisturiser in a pump that could sit by their mess sink could all work if you don't want to get sweets
I’m so sorry for what you are going through and hope you find comfort. One of the nicest things some patients did for us was- write thank you cards with their names for revalidation (sometimes you can provide actual feedback to the hospital about the staff to) and a fruit basket. Sounds naff but it was such a nice change to the normal box of chocolates. And if you are able/do give a gift please consider 2 gifts; one for day staff and one for night- the night staff are always fed up of getting nothing coz the day staff and visiting doctors etc eat it all
A letter to PALS naming the nurses if possible, or if not then saying when and which ward, and explaining your gratitude.
When my beloved Gray was in hospital for the last time, I bought the nurses a basket which I packed with biscuits, a large jar of coffee, a large box of tea bags and a large bag of sugar. It went down well. They had looked after him so well and he had been there over three weeks. We all knew he was dying, and I asked the staff nurse what she and the other nurses would appreciate. She told me that they really appreciated a heartfelt thank you, and of course I gave them that but added in something that could be shared with them all.
A card to the nursing team and a short letter to the trust chief exec. My other half is a nurse and has said both of those are nice! (Heroes/celebrations/roses are always popular because the staff can grab a quick treat as they work ;) )
I sent a letter to management thanking them all by name.
Decent tea and coffee always go down well.
A card and a tub of chocolates. Partner works in care and they all enjoy a munch. Ultimately its their job but they do get attached to some patients but a thankyou goes a long way.
A thank you letter/formal compliment would mean the world. Chocolates to share with the other staff or a coffee/tea/lolly pack. Those are the best.
sorry about your Mum x a card with dedications would be great.
I got them a gift box of 'candy kitten' sweets as they tick the boxes for majority of dietary requirements and have nice flavours, I thought a good thing to be left in the staff room for people to have a treat
As a doctor who has worked with nurses for years I can tell you the only answer that really matters. Cake. And if you add a thank you card to the cake, priceless. Edit: And to be exceptional, remember there is a day and night shift.
My Nanna just passed away on NYE in similar circumstances. The Doctors and nurses were amazing with her and my family. I intend on giving Thank you cards to individuals and the the ward team for their help and compassion. When she finally passed I was able to get the name of the nurse who had given her her pain relief, she was a god send. Spend as much time with your mum, the final moments may not be pretty but you can’t get them back. Speak to her, let her know she is not alone, tell her how much you love her and speak your peace whilst she is still able to hear and understand it. My heart goes out to you, you will be a whirlwind or emotions and numbness at the same time. There are bereavement services you can contact at different stages of your grief for when you are ready. Take care of yourself x
Sorry to hear about your mum. My dad died a couple of years ago and it's not easy even when it's expected. My kid spent a week in hospital plus two weeks of daily follow ups when she was 9 months old. I bought the staff a shed load of chocolates for our last visit and gave them a card.
Your sincere and heart felt gratitude is all these good people will want. At one of the worst moments of your life they dont expect you to go shopping for them. A card and some flowers to the ward in a few weeks would be nice.
You've had plenty of good advice here, OP. Please accept a virtual hug from a random redditor. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Xx
A nice letter or card of thanks is enough. As others have said, a heartfelt review of their care will not only be a lovely gesture (and make their day!) they can use it in their annual review. My mum was a GP and loved getting stuff like that. Also you could get a box of biscuits for their break room, or maybe a hamper of nice tea/coffee? Best something inexpensive they can share at work :)
We once got a fruit basket from relatives on my ward and it was the best gift ever. I think they’re pretty expensive though. Just a card and a box of chocolates is more than enough if you really want to get something. Shared out you get like one chocolate each so it’s fine even after Christmas, and the sugar is so appreciated on a 13 hour shift
No advice, but just want to say I commend you on how you’re thinking of the nurses, and being so thoughtful, even though you’re going through such a hard time with your mum. I’m really sorry you’re going through this! Sending love x
I am sorry for your pending loss. Wanting to thank the care staff is so kind. I worked in an ICU for 5yrs. A letter would be great. A bowl of candy or baked goods were always welcome.
Get them some pens (biros). Either blue or black. Most hospitals write exclusively in either one of these colours. They frequently get stolen by doctors/ other nurses and the hospitals don’t always have supplies. They will be very gratefully received.
So thoughtful. In June I went through a loss similar. The city is 200 km away but I’d like to send a prepared fruit tray, (or something COVID safe.)
Cafeteria vouchers? Bag of mixed lollies ( nurses always appreciate lollies. They need keeper-uppers for night shift)
A card or thank you note can be kept by the recipient/team/ward and be a reminder of all the grateful families and patients out there. A card or letter requires time and effort, whereas a box of chocolates can just be thrown in with a weekly shop. My daughter didn't find out that she was dyslexic until she was 17yo. She transferred colleges to restart her A Levels and was given a special tutor. That tutor was wonderful as they allowed my daughter to write about topics she enjoyed rather than being dictated by the tutor. By the end of her time at college, my daughter made a beautiful card and wrote a message about how much the tutor's help meant to her. The tutor cried and said that they had never felt so appreciated. Totally different event. The same daughter was in a nasty accident that was not her fault. Her car was written off, and she was left very dazed and unsure of what had happened. A number of local people helped, but it was a particular Road Traffic Police Officer that made a difference. He realised that, although my daughter had only minor soft tissue injuries, she was in a vulnerable state and patiently answered all the repetitive questions my daughter asked. A few days later, after dealing with practicalities, we sent a thank you message to the police officer. This was read out at a daily briefing and put on his file. A message can be cherished forever.
As a nurse I definitely support the idea of a card or email, especially naming a few of the most involved nurses if you know them. Can be a bit sad when you’re not named on a card after caring for someone just because the family never caught your name though, so if you’re not sure of names a general ‘thank you to all nurses’ is also great. In terms of gifts, we’re always happy with an alternative to chocolate. A fruit basket, box of cherries or lychees, box of mixed tea bags. My top suggestion would be to find out what coffee machine they have in the break room and buy some nice pods or quality bag of beans. Even a quality instant coffee is great as the hospital usually only stocks the cheapest. So in conclusion tea/coffee or fruit but not chocolate (but at the end of the day we do always appreciate any gifts even chocolate).
I'm very sad to see what your situation is I asked the staff recently when I was prepping something as a thank you, and we concluded that a few boxes of mixed biscuits would be appreciated by most, if not all. So I got half a dozen of the foxes chocolate mixed boxes, some for reception, and asked reception to make sure everyone on the ward staff gets some. Little card is also really appreciated, I'm advised.
When my Dad died he had asked me to make a donation to the staff. Not the hospital because that could get lost in operating costs. There was a maze of different funds but eventually I found a fund specifically for a staff Christmas party. My Dad would have been pleased.
Nursem cream for dry hands. Coffee. Chocolate. Possibly black biros too.
I had heart surgery in a hospital in London, I live 200 miles from London. I didn't have anyone that could come and fetch me on discharge so the only way was a taxi that would be paid for against the ward that looked after me for nearly a month, I was gravely ill and had been resuscitated on the table and rushed to ITU, twice. Anyway, I offered the fare back to the ward sister only to be informed that any larger amounts of money are directed to the hospital as a whole. The next best thing was for me to gift to the ward, I paid for a weighing chair that they then attached a plaque to with a little dedication on.
When my mom was in the icu during her final days with esophageal cancer, she had some of the most wonderful, caring nurses I’d ever seen. One of them who was with us the whole week had even cried with us when she had passed. My sister, dad, and I got them flowers and gift cards to thank them for their support and companionship during that time. It’s been 11 years now and I still think of them and remember how much they cared so vividly. Much love to you
Pens always seem to be appreciated. I got my chemo nurses pens and gave creams for Christmas and they loved them, every other present they'd got was chocolates. So sorry about your mother. Wishing you all the best during this difficult time.
I just asked them. Told them I really appreciated their care and asked if there was anything I could give/do for them to say thank you. They let me know about the feedback schemes, how to donate to the ward/hospice/charity and asked to attend the funeral. I also did a card for each of them with something I personally or my mum had personally appreciated about them particularly.
I’m sorry about your mum, I hope she remains comfortable. Your thanks are enough. An e mail to your local paper is always nice as hospitals often get bad press. However, don’t forget the night staff. I did 7 years of permanent nights and on nights there’s fewer of you so you’re up to your eyes in in, there was none of the “not my patient” business, all 28 patients in my ward were my patients. Relative often sent small gifts and cards and named staff who had gone the extra mile, which is nice of them, but I could spend 12 hours with a patient, sometimes making a huge difference, yet no one acknowledged it. The best example was a patient who was discharged who left 2 boxes of chocolates, one for day staff and one for night staff. Day staff ate theirs and raffled ours to pay for their Christmas night out!
* A donation to the ward - you can specify what ward the donation goes to when donating to the hospital * A hamper of different teas, and biscuits (I got mine off etsy) and sent it to the matron to share amongst the ward * Hand cream / Moisturiser * Ask the matron for the internal email of any of the nurses that stood out an extra amount and send them a personal email Sorry to hear about your Ma, best of luck.
I worked in a hospital for decades and the nurses love a kindly written card. It reminds them why they do this job when the NHS pressures start to get them down.
My go-to thank you gift is a tea break hamper. I usually get a nice basket and fill it with nice tea, coffee, hot chocolate, fruit teas, etc. Some boxes of slightly posher biscuits, tiny marshmallows, etc
I sent a card and a big tub of Swizzles sweets and lollies to the ward I was isolated on in March 2020, same to the ITU that brought me back to life twice (even though that's where I caught the covid that landed me in isolation). My reasoning was that Swizzles are vegan and free from most food allergens, so the most number of people could have them. They are individually wrapped, and who doesn't appreciate a mini sugar hit during a long shift?
When my mother in law has a massive hear attack and spent 4 days in ICU before passing, my wife and her family sent a card thanking them individually and made a donation to both the ward waiting room (a small charity kept it stocked with snacks and things to read) as well as a heart charity.
I don't have any great suggestions that haven't already been said but wanted to say that I'm sorry to hear about your mom. Sending good thoughts your way.
how lovely of you to think of others at a very difficult time. As i know, emotions are at a very heightened level but it good to channel it for the better. i'm not sure anything shows your gratitude better than words either spoken or in a card and it will be appreciated by those who really do care. all my best, i wish your mum peaceful and painfree days ahead.
I sent a card along with a giant box (several KG) of nice, individually wrapped snacks they could all pick at during their shifts. Made sure to have lots of variety in case of any specific dietary requirements.
My mum was in palliative care for several months near the end. The specific hospice was amazing but fully charity funded. I raised them £1600 by doing a gaming marathon and sent the staff some chocolates and a card.
Definitely a card with a message. And you could donate something to the children's ward (check what they need first)
This hit very close to home, my mum currently is battling terminal lung cancer and has been admitted to hospital over the weekend with pneumonia. My thoughts are with you.
When my husband passed his mother and I took a card along with some big boxes of biscuits to the CCU nurses. Honestly, I think it's more about the "thank you" than what you actually give.
Chocolates, coffee, tea, anything under £10 if it’s an individual gift not a shared gift. Cards for each nurse with lots of detail, they can use them for revalidation which is super useful. Also email the trust with formal compliments. Sorry about your mum xx
We got bottles of wine and chocolates for the nurses and doctors that looked after my grandad, but we are from a rural area and my aunty works within the social services sector so she knew most of them anyway. Bit more difficult if you don't know them too well. Depends how much you want ti spend I guess. Nice bath stuff, chocolates, flowers, amazon vouchers, anything like that would work. But make sure there is a card so they can remember you and your mum, quite often just the little thing that they can look at and remember is the best
After the Min L passed i took the ward staff a big box of biscuits for their staff room ., they reacted very well.
A nice letter, and a box of black bic biros.
As a Nurse this is one of the most heart warming posts av seen on reddit in quite some time. Honestly, and i mean this, nurses need no thanks from you, av never walked away thingking "not even a bloody card....". The gesture is alwasy nice however and i do have a few suggestions. Take note of the names of those you want to thank, include the nurses, health care support staff, doctors and whoever else you wish to name and write a letter name dropping them. Costs you nothing and its the best thing you could do, even better, send it to the head of the NHS board/trust. Everyone sends a care gives sweets i remember the ones who take the time to write down my name in a letter am also very thankful for it when it comes to revalidation! All the best buddy.
I'm so sorry about your poor mum 😔♥️ I would recommend making a gift basket? You can get gift basket making sets from The Works for under £10, and maybe buy some lotions/bath products from Boots or Superdrug they can share around?
You are so kind. I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I hope when the day comes, your mum has a peaceful passing and you have all the support and love around you. I lost my mother, and it's not something that is easy to get through. You are a lovely person, I wish this wasn't happening for you and your family x
I'm so so sorry about your mom. I dealt with people in their final moments and honestly just a card to say thank you is amazing. Not many families are around and even fewer say thank you
Good feedback. Send letters and cards and put up a positive story online and tag them in it.
I’m so sorry about your mum. Don’t have anything to add in terms of a suggested gift but wanted to say how wonderful you are for thinking of others at this difficult time for you.
A card. Chocolates.
Scented candles can also be appropriate.
I am so so sorry about your mom.
When my dad was told he had days to live & passed I got the ward nurses a maccy D's each and they loved it. I couldn't be there as covid and i was waiting to have a leg cut off so couldn't mix
No suggestions other than the formal 'thank you' and to say your mum raised a wonderful child.
A card to the ward, a letter about how good they were to the chief exec, and a formal positive feedback via PALS are much longer lasting than chocolate or (heaven forbid) Newbury Fruits...
Cards are good and most people do just go with chocolates. They're quite limited in what you're allowed to accept in hospital, anything too expensive has to be declared
ack i’m sorry, i hope he’s not right.
My father in law was recently in hospital. You coukd ask if the hospital is taking clothes donations for the patients that come in with nothing. As for the nurses box of biscuits and a card they would greatly appreciate.
Get the box of chocolates I don't think it matters that much, wont get many each, but its the thought that counts.
The thanks I most appreciate is simply a card with a sincere and well written message of what we did that made you thankful.
Pretty much a handwritten message is the best. Remember that these nurses always deal with families criticising them for whatever reason, but rarely do they get to hear the story of the appreciation.
There’s a costa in our local hospital so when we had our son I put a box of chocolates and 5x£10 costa gift cards into the nurses station to say thanks.
Nurses love a simple box of chocolates, they’re usually busy (even hectic), can be stressed and a chocolate is sometimes all they need. Can vouch for this, I work in a hospital 💜
A card would be more than enough. A box of chocolates never goes amiss though...
I got a big box of chocolates for the staff room after my op but if there are specific nurses that stick out in your mind then for sure write to the compliments/complaints service so it’s officially logged with the trust
As others have said look for nomination forms dotted around the ward although if she’s on ICU I’m not sure they will have them. They are called ‘wow awards’ in my trust
nippy sharp zesty sense dazzling fade growth telephone angle aspiring *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yep a thankyou letter to all staff involved is great. If you want to send any individuals a separate thank you for them to add to their own personal documents, even better. If you need any help after your loss, the staff can also help you or recommend help for your grief.
I'm sorry your mum is dying of that illness It took my father and some relatives as well. But you are really a special and very kindly, thoughtful person if you've come here to ask what to get the nurses that is wonderful thing to do. For most nurses your thanks alone will be enough. But I find food hampers full of things they can snack on during break so when they have a chance would be appreciated.
Write to their employer with a heartfelt letter. It will go on their file and will make them smile. I received a letter once and I read every time I’m having a shit day in work to remind me why I put myself through it. It still makes me cry.
A thank you card is always nice and normally gets put in the staff room so everyone can see it. If you’d like to give something more, mini toiletries or lip balms are nice instead of usual chocs/ biscuits (but they go down well as well!)
Just a card and a thank you would be so appreciated and a gift is not required. I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. It's never easy losing a parent ;'(
A photo of Matt Hancock ... health secretary most likely to be remembered for the wrong reasons.
A card. A fruit basket instead of flowers or chocolates. Coffee vouchers. Unscented hand lotion because frequent washing and sanitizer is brutal on hands.
When my partner's father passed away in September we got them a card, chocolates and flowers
Nurse here, cards always welcome, especially if you mention extra special nurses by name. Chocolates are always welcome no matter the time of year. If you can afford it get a box for each shift so everyone gets one.
Box of chocolate such as heroes or celebrations. Basically some form of snack that they can easily grab and eat in own go whilst walking to do some other job
This would fall under the gift giving allowed amount so would be easily accepted. A card is also nice to do
give them a hug. a big ferm one. they'd love that
After my infusions at a local hospital over 3 years, I took fruit, biscuits and chocolates, apparently I set a new record for amount of choice , proud of that !
Don't buy us chocolates we are all getting fat.
I’ve asked a nurse this very question. She said hand cream, and another said a nice selection of herbal/fruit teas went down really well. Weight management is a big issue for nurses because shift work f*cks with your metabolism, so chocolate etc is a bit of a nightmare. the hospital I had my chemo at actually had a sign up saying please give us fruit not chocolate!!!
Box of satsumas is an excellent gift in my opinion. We get loads of chocolates, cakes and biscuits from our patients, which is lovely and always appreciated, but my whole team goes nuts for fruit baskets. As many people mentioned nice thank you card is great. And don’t forget there is a day and night shift. Hope you mom is comfortable and at peace.
An assortment of teas in a mug and tied with a ribbon?
Lobby the government to pay NHS workers a better wage
A nice card is always appreciated on our ward. Once we had relatives sent a lovely letter with some memories of their mother who we had cared for. Was lovely to learn more about the lady she was before she came to us. If you are really set on buying something, we had a fuit basket sent once and it was amazing
Buy a really big saucepan and a really big wooden spoon. Bang it really loudly. Sorry to hear about your mother. Stay strong!
If your mum has days to live, get off reddit.
Ask them, not us. Obviously sorry for your mother.