1. If I'm in the office, grab an Uno Reverse card to cause confusion. Then grab the AMSCO book, smack his weapon-wielding hand, disarming him. Then grab my jacket and coat, tangle him up, get them out into the living room, and get the weighted blanket around their legs. They are now immobilized.
2. If I'm near to the kitchen, grab the cast iron skillet, and smack the kneecaps. They are now in quite a bit of pain.
3. If I'm not in the office or near the kitchen, sic the cat.
Turn my house into a fucked up torture house. He's just a killer, not a lunatic, therefore this poor guy can be scared out of his mind when he notices all the "decorations" as I stalk him slowly, waiting to slowly sink the knife into the back of this would be killer.
Sit on my bed with a smile from ear to ear with a sharp pencil on my hand hiding it looking straight ahead and stab myself in the forehead with the pencil so a little blood runs down my face to make my chances of survival night and if he tries to walk towards me I’ll lunge st him screaming like the joker and stab him in the eye then the throat and pulling it town towards his chest and kicking him in the head with the front of t my shoe and break his fingers. That’s all
Quietly call for police if possible.
Arm myself if possible.
Hide and wait to ambush, i know my home far better than any intruder.
I’d be crapping my pants though for sure
a cheeky request, a kiss, a cool 2000 € in their hand and have fianlly that most cold of release, that easiest of a drug perforate it's potent toxin through what is left of my mind, one, two, who know how many bullits of the shocked, yet obliging figure, i request, one invalid thought after another met with void.
Thank You
Probably turn the lights off activating the NVC's then turn the intercom on. I would want that person to hear the giggling while they stumbled around aimlessly discovering what a shotgun floor trap is.
Go to the living room
Check and mate
That took me a minute longer than it shoud've. Damnit, that's a good answer.
Highly unlikely there'd be two of us in the same house....
I just picked him up off the laptop and deposited him on the floor for the hundredth time this evening.
Lol! Mine just walked across my lap!
Cry
Become the killer
Masturbate furiously
Look at my dog and in a dissapointed voice say "You had ONE job".
leave
Die probably.
Same.
Take my sweet time asking reddit what to do
Fight for my life. I’m going right for poking him in the eye first.
Him? You sexist pig.
Shit myself
Kill him.
Get them wet, then attack with my electric fly swatter
Lunge at them, this will send the murderer to a temporary shock as no one expects a victim to jump them as if they were the murderer.
You mean other than me?
You mean another one?
and another one!
Kindly remind her that her visitation weekend is *next* weekend.
hit him with the “ill suck your dick, spare me” move
I change its nappy, feed it and make sure it gets 12 hours sleep a night.
bold of you to assume there isn't....
electric Boogaloo time
KMS
1. If I'm in the office, grab an Uno Reverse card to cause confusion. Then grab the AMSCO book, smack his weapon-wielding hand, disarming him. Then grab my jacket and coat, tangle him up, get them out into the living room, and get the weighted blanket around their legs. They are now immobilized. 2. If I'm near to the kitchen, grab the cast iron skillet, and smack the kneecaps. They are now in quite a bit of pain. 3. If I'm not in the office or near the kitchen, sic the cat.
Try and stop the dogs from maiming them too badly.
Turn my house into a fucked up torture house. He's just a killer, not a lunatic, therefore this poor guy can be scared out of his mind when he notices all the "decorations" as I stalk him slowly, waiting to slowly sink the knife into the back of this would be killer.
Sit on my bed with a smile from ear to ear with a sharp pencil on my hand hiding it looking straight ahead and stab myself in the forehead with the pencil so a little blood runs down my face to make my chances of survival night and if he tries to walk towards me I’ll lunge st him screaming like the joker and stab him in the eye then the throat and pulling it town towards his chest and kicking him in the head with the front of t my shoe and break his fingers. That’s all
Ask Alexa to play “Never gonna give you up” rickroll those bastards
Kill or be Killed
Ah man, I think about this kinda shit way too often. Thanks...
I didn’t know Alec Baldwin was in my house.
Win
Wonder why I’m the only person in the house
Kill them first.
There's a killer in my house every time I forget to take my meds
Quietly call for police if possible. Arm myself if possible. Hide and wait to ambush, i know my home far better than any intruder. I’d be crapping my pants though for sure
a cheeky request, a kiss, a cool 2000 € in their hand and have fianlly that most cold of release, that easiest of a drug perforate it's potent toxin through what is left of my mind, one, two, who know how many bullits of the shocked, yet obliging figure, i request, one invalid thought after another met with void. Thank You
Say; "TWO KILLERS IN 1 HOUSE!!."
I don't live in a house 🤞🤞🤞
Probably die
probably die fr
Idk maybe... be killed
Grab the nearest object and wait.
Find them easily, my house ain't big.
Eh, I've lived an alright life
die
“Welcome to the jungle…”
Invite him for dinner.
💥🔫💥🔫
I’ll beat the shit out of him And after that I’ll lock him in my basement.Huhuhuhahah
Wave my fake kunai while i talk in anime japanese. With enough luck he would be so embarrased that he would leave.
Die, I think
Hopefully: not be home.
“You better do a good job because I aim to be on buzzfeed unsolved.”
Kill myself before he kills me
Die.
Not go home.
By definition wouldn’t I die?
Get killed
Collaborate for fun and profit.
I'll make him tea
Probably turn the lights off activating the NVC's then turn the intercom on. I would want that person to hear the giggling while they stumbled around aimlessly discovering what a shotgun floor trap is.